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It was supposed to be a simple trip to Inazuma. A little break from his work as an assistant to Lesser Lord Kusanali. ‘Surrounding yourself in a different environment does a lot to enrichen your mind’, was the thing Nahida told him, even though he didn’t see how that will be useful to him in the future.
But Wanderer’s idle standing was cut short as he was spotted by the Traveler, who apparently was busy with doing the one thing they were best at - helping others with negligible problems. Paimon waved her arms around, not only drawing Wanderer’s attention but also the attention of various monsters nearby. But she did not seem to care and shouted the following words at him -
“Oh, Wanderer! Great timing! We gotta show you something!”
Not wanting to further spend his time doing absolutely nothing, he decided to follow them.
That was his mistake.
One thing lead to another and he found himself in the outskirts of Inazuma City - right in front of the Raiden Shogun - or rather Ei herself. Wanderer shot a doubtful glance at the Traveler. Just what did he agree to?
“Oh, and he - is he your friend?”, Ei asked, completely unaware of the history between them.
“That’s right. We uh… we met in Sumeru.”
“Hello, it’s an honor to meet the Electro Archon in person“, he said, repressing the urge to make a grimace.
‘It didn't matter’ , Wanderer thought to himself. Irminsul made her forget about him. But it’s not like she would’ve cared about him in the first place. She was the entire reason he was abandoned.
“So what is your name?”, her question pulled him back into the conversation.
“Me? Oh, I’m just a wanderer, haha.”
She seemed to accept that answer, but her eyes were still fixated at him. Just what did she find so fascinating about him? There was no way she would know - she could know. Then he realized that she wasn’t looking at him , she was staring at the vision or rather the golden ornament attached to it. It was… How did it get there at all? Wanderer couldn’t make sense of how the reality that Irminsul made for him gave his incarnation that attire. Was it really just to fit the new narrative of the fabricated memories? Or was it an attempt at a sick joke? Whatever it was, in the end he still couldn’t bring himself to discard it.
“Curious, I feel like I have seen an ornament like that before”, she finally pointed out. “It must have been a long time ago…”
“Is that so”, he responded, trying to sound indifferent about it.
“Yes… Ah, I must apologize. I didn’t mean to be so sentimental all of the sudden.”
It didn’t matter. Wanderer repeated to himself. It didn't matter. Then why? Why did he feel sad about it? Was it even sadness or was it anger? A regret about a time that never was and never will be? Irminsul did not change the past, only the memories of the past. But do these memories change the emotions of that past?
“It’s strange, really”, she continued. “I can almost picture it in my mind, but I cannot remember the details. It’s like a blur.”
“Oh, Paimon gets it! It’s like when you’re taking a test and you can’t think of the answer of that one question but you’re sure you actually know the answer!”
“Uh, yes, I suppose it’s like that.”
Wanderer now frowned at the Traveler. If they were somehow expecting Ei to be an exception to Irminsul’s memory erasure, they must have drawn a conclusion by now. Though it seems the conclusion it not as clear cut as presumed. He mentally shook his head. It didn’t matter.
Finally the Traveler decided to say something.
“I guess, we can’t expect archons to be blessed with an excellent memory”, they said rather jokingly.
“It would seem that way”, Ei responded. “Well, it was nice talking to you, but I have other matters to attend to now.”
Wanderer didn’t even bother to listen to the Traveler and Paimon saying their goodbyes to Ei. He just stared blankly at the horizon, processing the entire conversation, until Paimon called out to him.
“Hey, Wanderer - are you okay?”
“I’m fine. I just wondered what you tried to gain from this little meet-up? Surely you weren’t hoping we could have a heartfelt reunion or something?”
“Uh, no?”, Paimon replied while the Traveler gave Wanderer an apologetic look.
“Well”, they started. “We were thinking about telling Ei about you, but we felt like if anything it should be you to tell her…”
“And with this meeting we first wanted to see if uhm a miracle would happen”, Paimon continued.
“Miracle?”, Wanderer asked.
“You know, like if she would just remember - like an instinct or something!”
“As you can see, that did not happen.”
“Are you mad at us?”
“No, it doesn’t matter”, he said. “Go ahead and try to tell her the truth. See if she believes you. I won’t be there to care about it. But I’d rather that you didn’t. It was actually quite good to find out that she does in fact not remember me. Less to worry about then.”
“What about her reaction to the ornament? Wasn’t that weird? Don’t you care about that?”, Paimon asked further.
“No, I don’t.”
Maybe it was a lie. Maybe deep down he did care about what that was all about. But he said to himself that it did not matter. And why should it? Ei never was a mother to him - just a person that brought him into existence. Would a mother abandon her own child like this? All alone, no loving hand to guide them and no caring words to advice them. No, she had failed to do even the barest minimum. Neglecting him wasn’t an act of mercy or an excuse to not intervene in his fate, it was just running away from her responsibilities.
“But… what if you could reconcile? What if she apologized to you? Do you not wish to know? Are you really okay with that?”
“Yes, I’m okay with that.” He laughed at their concern for him. “It’s okay, really. After all, I wouldn’t remember me either.”