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Ava was mad. She was furious. Not only did she get stuck having to be in what was essentially an oven suit but she had to deal with kids having to be assholes to her too? Fuck this shit! It may be 11-year-old Michael's birthday but she will not tolerate his stupid friends who won't stop trying to hit her head because they think that the head of this godforsaken costume is a helmet, which makes it somehow okay in their tiny pea-brain minds?
Now little Michael is hugging her right leg, begging her not to go. Rittany the Rat is his favorite. But Ava has HAD IT so despite the fact that she has to drag her child-imprisoned leg to the other side of the restaurant she walks up to the manager and pulls Rittany's head off her face. Duretti looks at her, bewildered. Oh she hated him. Him and his stupid little hat, always clean from all the grease and ketchup that stain everyone else's uniform, and his stupid holier-than-thou look, and his stupid shiny fucking manager badge!
"I hate you." Ava says with hate seething out of every syllable. "And I hate this job, and I hate your face, and I hate this stupid costume, and I hate these stupid kids! I quit!"
Ava grabs the ketchup bottle nearest to her and empties it on Duretti's uniform. She half-hears someone cheer at this. That may have been Vincent, one of the regulars.
Duretti stands there, too shocked to react. Also maybe because he's just old, Ava thinks passively, as she looks down with a hard glare at the little boy on her leg. Not that she was a psychopath but if looks could kill...
Michael's mother appears beside her and pries the little boy away, no doubt thinking she'll do something outrageous like make Michael explode or something.
Finally free from the shackles of the little blonde kid, Ava turns around and walks straight out the door. She flips her middle finger as she walks out, feelings of vindication undamped even by the knowledge that the costume only shows her holding a paw up in the air.
~~~
Beatrice heaves a deep sigh. She wonders for the nth time how she got herself into this. She can blame it on her pride or her exceptional work ethic, but she won’t. Instead she will absolutely blame it on her friends, who are, at the moment, the bane of her existence.
She never took it seriously because she never thought it was serious. She had no inkling whatsoever that the stupid bet she took when she was drunk two years ago would come back and bite her in the ass.
Well now it has. Because Camila is showing her a video of her drunken promise to go through with the most horrendous idea she may have ever come up with, even in the midst of a drunken stupor.
Beatrice glares at the screen as she watches her younger, drunker self, slur out the nightmare she’ll live in the next few hours.
The grainy footage echoes in her living room as Mary, Camila, and even Lilith look at her with shit-eating grins.
“I swear on my entire book collection- *hiccup* that I -*hiccup* am going to the beach dressed in a frog suit! *hiccup* a bright and green frog suit *hiccup* so long as I don’t have a girlfriend by the year 2023! And Camila absolutely! *hiccup* has the right to steal my whole collection if I don’t *hiccup* do otherwise. I promise this *hiccup* on everything I hold dear!”
The video stops and there’s absolute silence as Beatrice seethes at the video and her friends try their best not to laugh.
“Don’t worry.” Mary says. “We already have the suit. All you have to do is wear it.”
Beatrice pales as she watches Lilith pull up the hanger with the garment bag and opens up the zipper to reveal shiny green fabric.
~~~
Ava doesn’t know how long she’s been walking but she takes special pleasure in knowing that she’s fucking up Rittany the Rat’s fake fur by stomping around everywhere. And then it sinks in that she’s still wearing the Rittany costume. Ava suddenly notices the many many passersby who are looking at her. She sees someone hold up their phone in her direction and she does the only thing she can think to do. Put on Rittany’s head and run far far away from the pier.
~~~
Beatrice knows her face is red with embarrassment, and maybe a few shots. She couldn’t possibly do this without some form of alcohol thrumming in her veins. So, she takes another shot as her friends egg her on for a picture.
They are at the beach, all slightly drunk, Beatrice most of all. Camila is recording as much as she can on her phone and Lilith is doing the same as Mary tried to corral Bearice into posing for the camera. The good news is that the more alcohol she has in her system the more the embarrassment flows away.
It also helps that they are on a deserted part of the beach and it was getting dark. So, Beatrice poses for her friend's benefits and starts laughing at the circumstance.
But the frog suit is starting to get hot and itchy, especially with all that got in from the multiple falls she’s had on the beach. Not to mention the mess of her hair, as she’s been trying to keep the frog hat/head on as much as she can in her intoxicated state.
“Can I please change now?” Beatrice slurs as her question falls on deaf ears, drowned out by the laughter of the other three.
Maybe they’re way more drunk than Beatrice gave them credit for. They should really stop doing this.
“I’m going to change now!” Beatrice shouts at them.
Camila and Lilith are dancing together and Mary is drinking from a bottle that Beatrice can’t quite make out. She gives up trying to get them to notice her and instead stumbles her way toward where she remembers the comfort rooms should be. She’s sure it’s only a couple minutes walk in this direction. Yep. She is definitely sure of it.
~~~
Ava finds herself running on the beach. It was getting dark and Rittany’s head wasn’t doing anyone any favors. She has limited vision in this thing and it’s fucking terrible, but her adrenaline and embarrassment won’t let her stop running. So she runs and runs and runs and-
Suddenly she is sprawled on the floor, her weight on top of… something.
It’s big and very very slippery. Her eyes open to an expanse of green body and gaping black mouth, tentacles where lips should be, topped by its weird wandering eyes.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” Ava screams in utter fear!. It’s a fucking monster! She’s gonna fucking die! Holy shit holy shit holy shit!
Ava scrambles away from the thing and runs as fast as she can away from it, falling on the beach a couple of times, before she realizes the thing isn’t chasing her. She looks back to see a green blob where she left it.
A million thoughts rage in her mind, about possible death by alien life form, and possible fame from discovering said alien life form.
Ava decides it would be best to check on it. It didn’t seem to be moving anyway.
She moves to take Rittany’s head off of her but hesitates last minute. The more protection the better. She decides to leave it on as she heads back to the blob of green. She picks up a piece of driftwood the size of half her arm on the way, just in case it gets violent.
~~~
Beatrice was in a daze. She wasn’t sure what happened but she’s pretty sure she passed out for a while. She’s also pretty sure she heard an ungodly noise right before that.
In her half-consciousness she can make out the sounds of approaching footsteps. Was it Mary?
She moves to wipe the hair off her face, craning her neck to get a better look when a high pitched noise greets her ear and the sight of a giant furry monster greets her eyes. She rolls away just in time as the monster thwacks the ground she was on with something. What the fuck!??!
Beatrice gets up and sees a giant monstrous creature threatening her with a stick. Beatrice gets sober real fast.
~~~
Ava is in a state of complete panic as she watches the thing leap to its feet, squaring off with her. She tries to hit it again with the piece of driftwood but it was fast and Rittany’s head still offered limited vision.
Fuck this shit! She wasn’t going to die tonight!
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Ava screams her lungs out as she tries to hit the thing with her stick.
The figure dodges out of the way and she finds herself on the ground, driftwood-less and in a fetal position as the thing assaults her head. Those boys were right though, Rittany’s head was a great helmet actually.
“STOP STOP STOP!” Ava yells out, hoping by some miracle the thing would stop. And miraculously it does.
~~~
Beatrice feels like she’s living a fever dream. She’s sweaty and heaving and a giant furry thing just spoke English. Fuck. She must be way more drunk than she thought. The moment she thinks this her nausea gets the better of her and she vomits right on the beach.
“Holy fuck. What the fuck.” Beatrice hears behind her, as she takes the stupid frog head/hat off and pulls her hair back as she wipes her face with it.
“What the fuck.” Beatrice hears from the same voice, as she spits on the ground. She turns to the giant furry monster and sees the head of a girl where the furry head used to be.
~~~
“You’re a girl.” Ava says, baffled at the girl in green before her. “What the fuck?”
The girl looks at her incredulously.
“You almost killed me.” the girl says.
“Excuse me!? You’re the one that hit my head! Multiple times, may I add!?”
“You were looming over me like some creep and tried to hit me WHILE I WAS DOWN! You’re clearly the one who tried to murder me first!”
“Well maybe if you didn’t just appear out of nowhere looking like some reptilian alien creature type shit I would have known you were a normal human being!”
“You’re wearing a fucking furry costume! AND FROGS ARE AMPHIBIANS NOT REPTILES!”
Ava looks at the insane frog girl.
“It was for a kids party and her name is RITTANY THE RAT!”
~~~
Beatrice stares at the woman in front of her, still incredulous, and not knowing how to react. The woman stares back at her, also incredulous but also full of rage, as if Beatrice was in the wrong when she was the one who knocked her out. Wait, yes. She was the one that knocked her out. That’s what that godforsaken noise was. It was that woman’s scream. Beatrice was also suddenly mad because what the fuck?
“You were the one that ran into me and knocked me the fuck out!”
The woman stares at Beatrice and blinks.
“I-” she starts.
“Fuck.” The woman says, trying to run her hands through her hair but failing because all she had were giant rat paws.
“Okay,” the woman says, “Let’s calm down.”
Beatrice was more than fine with this and she lets herself breathe and lose some tension.
~~~
Ava takes deep breaths and looks at the woman in front of her. She would judge her for wearing a full green bodysuit in the middle of the beach but who was she to judge really?
“Are you filming something?” Ava asks.
“What?” the woman looks at her, confused. Was that a British accent? Maybe it was an English film or something.
“Like a movie or something? That’s what the bodysuit is for right? Special effects?”
The woman blinks at Ava. Then she shakes her head.
“No,” she says. “This is completely all because of my dumb friends and their dumb ideas.”
“Oh…” it dawns on Ava. “You lost a bet, didn’t you?”
The woman lets out a deep breath. “Something like that.”
~~~
“What about you?” Beatrice asks the woman in front of her. “Is the birthday party over?”
The woman glances down at herself and also heaves a deep sigh.
“Something like that…” the woman says, looking up at Beatrice as if deciding something. “I just quit my job.”
“Congrats,” Beatrice says, with a nod. “Seems like it was a shitty job anyway.”
“Thanks,” says the woman. “I’m Ava, by the way.”
Beatrice looks at her. Ava. That seems to suit the woman in front of her.
“Beatrice.”
Ava scrunches her face at this. “Huh. I thought you’d be a Sally or something.”
Beatrice snorts. “What about me makes you think I’m a Sally?”
“Well,” Ava gives her a once over. “That, for starters. Sally seems like the type to dress up in a frog costume when she’s drunk. Or maybe a Rebecca, I don’t know.”
“That’s fair,” Beatrice nods. “Very white, but fair. How’d you know I was drunk?”
“You literally just vomited a few minutes ago. I’m pretty sure that wasn’t from fear… am I wrong?”
Beatrice shakes her head, confirming Ava’s conclusions.
~~~
Ava and Beatrice just stand there for a while, not exactly knowing what to do. It’s Beatrice that breaks the silence.
“Do you know where the bathroom is?”
“Uh… I think it’s just a few minutes walks this way.” Ava points in the direction she came from.
“Okay. Well, that’s where I’m going.” Beatrice makes a move to leave but Ava stops her.
“Wait!”
“Yes, Ava?” beatrice says, testing the name out on her tongue. Ava likes the sound of it.
“Can I go with you? I would also like to change.”
Beatrice nods. “Yeah, sure.”
They walk in silence to the bathroom. Ava, swinging Rittany’s head while they go and Beatrice fighting the urge to throw the frog head/hat away.
“I’m sorry, by the way. For essentially almost bashing your head in.” Beatrice says, eyeing Rittany’s head.
“Oh it’s no problem. Rittany is a tough cookie,” Ava says, holding up the now-deformed looking head. “Besides I almost hit you and you didn’t have a helmet just as good so I’m pretty sure I was the one closest to committing a murder tonight,” Ava says chuckling.
Beatrice gives a little laugh at this too and they continue their peaceful journey through the beach.
They finally reach the bathrooms before Beatrice realizes one crucial thing.
“Oh no…”
“What?” Ava asks out of concern.
Beatrice sighs and slumps her head on the wood of the bathroom wall. “I forgot to bring my clothes.”
Ava stares at her. And then starts hysterically giggling.
Beatrice glares at Ava but this makes Ava laugh even more. Beatrice eventually gives up and lets a smile form on her lips as she watches Ava clutching her stomach in what are now full blown fits of laughter.
Beatrice lets a laugh escape her lips as well. Ava’s laughs are contagious. They eventually end up leaning on the same wall, as their laughter ebbs away.
“Oh!‘ Ava exclaims and reaches the other side of the wall. A moment later the light from the bathroom ceiling switches on.
Beatrice lets her vision travel down from the light and onto the woman beside her. Ava has short hair and a blinding smile.
“What a night,” Ava says as she looks at Beatrice with a glint in her eyes.
“Indeed.” Beatrice says, with a smile of her own.
Ava looks at Beatrice under the lights and feels her stomach flutter. Oh. She was really pretty.
They look at each other’s eyes, not wanting to look anywhere else.
“You know, I just realized I also forgot my extra clothes and all my stuff at my job that I just quit, after squirting ketchup at the manager,” Ava whispers with a mischievous tone.
“No…” Beatrice whispers back, grin wide and free.
“Yep,” Ava nods. “Underneath this Rittany costume is sweat and stink galore. I can feel my shirt and shorts soaked all the way through.”
Beatrice laughs at this. “You know, this day started off horrendously but you and your Rittany costume have saved tonight.”
“I feel the same about you and your bodysuit,” Ava replies.
They smile at each other like idiots and they realize, well it really isn’t so bad at all. Nature works in weird ways and amphibians and rodents can get on quite well actually.
