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The snow was spiraling down in a misty, chilling haze, piling on the one-inch blanket of fluff covering the ground and trees, creating an almost otherworldly atmosphere.
Although it wasn’t his favorite season, Ren had a healthy appreciation of winter. And winter in Japan was, well… something else. In China, in the Tao estate surrounded by wild and boundless nature (not to mention the undead Jiang-si down in your basement), it was almost eerie, downright creepy for any other person. It was easy for him, the heir of the long prosecuted clan, to imagine powerful enemies using the white haze as a shield, biding their time for an attack. That, along with the extreme cold, were reasons why he never looked forward to the season in his youth.
In Japan, however, especially in the last month of the year, the flurry of activity seemed to never stop. People go around in families or as couples, filling various shops in their need to but gifts and souvenirs and whatnot.
Which was something his mind couldn’t quite grasp. For a nation which was not pre-dominantly Christian, Japan seemed to celebrate Christmas with a fervor.
Looking at the wandering couples and listening to their fading laughter, Ren tried to name the feeling that was growing inside his chest. It wasn’t wistfulness, not exactly… But he couldn’t help but think it would’ve been nice to have someone to share the unwelcome cold with. It was not like Ren would admit this openly to anyone, and his friends (with the annoying exception of Yoh) tend to leave him to his own vices lest they face his grumpiness. He wasn’t sure if what he was searching for was a friendly contact, anyway.
Soundlessly, he extended his hand forward to allow a few flakes to land on his gloved palm. Silent and tranquil… Holding somewhat of an enchanting beauty…
Stringing these words together, he had a surprising picture in front of his mind’s eye.
Ren felt the heat that was the telltale of red color spreading on his face, and knew that it had nothing to do with the cold. This rush of feeling was nothing new to him, although still quite foreign, seeing that it was one of the many he had locked inside his heart for so long. Shyness… Embarrassment… Words he had purposefully forgotten the meanings of, even.
All these emotions triggered by the one person… which he had to remind himself, with a frown slowly etching in place, he had no right to harbor any kind of interest.
‘Don’t make me laugh,’ whispered a voice inside his head, a permanent fixture in his life after he allowed Yoh to cleanse his spirit. ‘You are too much of a coward to even admit to her what you did. Yet you talk about emotions and fluff like some kind of sentimental old fool. You make me sick.’
It was true… he felt sick to his stomach just thinking about it. The night when he had attacked Meiling, his first opponent in the preliminaries who he lost against, out of spite. There was no other way to describe it – the defeat had been a harsh blow against his set goal. Kill them all… Kill so he could lessen his pain, and he couldn’t let go of a humiliation like that. One cleverly planned ambush and nothing more than a slash of his guandao, since these lowlifes deserved nothing more, and he had left her there, right in the middle of the street to die.
At least that was what he believed… he still had absolutely no idea how she survived, he knew his blows when he delivered them and it had been a deadly one, point blank. It was the kind of blow one would require a miracle to survive.
He didn’t know what happened with her but often found himself grateful for that miracle. For all it’s worth, it was hard imagining a world without Meiling.
Ren sighed and brought a hand to his eyes as the images of that night still kept playing in his mind. “Go away,” he muttered in an undertone, not sure if the simple phrase was directed to the images, his feels or the annoying voice.
Another voice answering him was, by far, the last thing he had expected.
“Go away? Why, I only just came.”
It wasn’t one of his proudest moments when Ren jumped up, startled, to face the sound of the voice. Although he didn’t need to see the person to know who had just spoken. Indeed, the redhead girl stood behind the bench, a big smile on her face and her hands held suspiciously behind her.
“What are you holding back there?” Granted, not the best welcoming phrase, but this was just his way of dodging the uncomfortable churn of turmoil he had just been in.
Meiling merely chuckled. “No no, one thing at a time.”
“Why are you here?” Another defensive question, maybe even a little accusatory. Ren didn’t know what to think of her sudden appearance, as if just simply thinking about her had somehow summoned her.
She moved to sit next to him, skillfully managing to hide her hands all the time. “Well to be frank, I was looking for you. Everyone kind of is.” She looked around. “Although I didn’t exactly expect to find you in a park.”
“I do like nature.” He reminded her, or did she forget? That was almost disheartening.
Meiling gave him a roll of her golden eyes – a feature they both shared, although hers looked warmer, like the sun, while he always found his cold, like the imposing gold. “I know, dummy. But you are not a people’s person. You wouldn’t run away from friends to hide in a crowd.”
“Who is hiding?” he asked, the usual irritability coating his tone. “Can’t I just want to be alone among people I don’t know?”
She shrugged. “Eh, I guess. But not on New Year’s eve, I imagine.” She nudged her head to the busy street.
Ren was taken aback for a moment. How could she read him like clear water? His gaze also drifted to where she was looking, and they watched as a young couple walked by, hand in hand. That earlier feeling Ren refused to identify as wistfulness returned, but considerably lightened.
“Didn’t think people would still be interested in spending unnecessary money,” Ren observed in a matter-of-fact tone.
“It’s not just Christmas,” Meiling informed him. “People use the transition to a new year to show their love and support too.” She paused, making Ren give her a sidelong glance. She appeared to be… blushing? “Which reminds me…”
And that was when she revealed what she had been hiding all this time. Behind her was a gift package, wrapped in some bright colored paper.
Ren was rendered speechless for a moment. “I…” he started to say, not being used to receiving gifts. “I didn’t get you anything.” Not that he knew exactly what to gift her, but it seemed appropriate.
He was surprised when this only caused the girl to laugh openly. “Dummy,” she said again, light-heartedly while she leaned a bit closer. “Only you would go and forget your own birthday.”
Another surprise, although one that Ren felt a little… peculiar. His birthday had never really been an occasion he looked forward to, and it was largely due to his family’s idea of celebration. The gifts he received had never been ones considered suitable for children - all only to further the Tao drive to hone his skills and lust for revenge to perfection.
But then, there was something infinitely different and more powerful here. This was a heart-felt gesture, one that was truly meant for him instead of his accomplishments. One that… made his heart grow warm.
He took the gift from her without a word and began unwrapping it, taking his time. For some reason, he didn’t want to damage the paper.
It was a scarf, a long and warm looking one in colors of dark purple and gold.
“Figured you could do with a new one,” Meiling said with a small shrug, a smile still lingering on her lips.
Feeling the material, Ren shifted his gaze back to the girl and his smile was a small but genuine mirror of hers. “Thank you. I… appreciate it.”
Pulling off the scarf from around his neck and draping it over one arm, he pulled on the gift. Meiling clapped her hands in joy, her smile growing big.
“Okay, we can go back now. I promised the others I would drag you back in less than an hour.”
Ren almost groaned. Almost. “Don’t tell me you have this big party planned.” He still wasn’t fond of big celebrations.
“Depends on your definition of big.” Ren couldn’t quite manage to hide rolling his eyes. Getting up, the girl offered him her hand to make him stand. There was a brief rush of electricity between them… one Ren wanted to think he imagined and was not sure if Meiling felt it herself. “C’mon, let’s go.”
Her holding onto his arm, they turned and were ready to depart when the girl stopped once more. “Wait just a second…”
“Now what?” Ren mumbled.
Taking a deep breath, Meiling untangled her arm from his and took a step forward… only to let herself fall into the snow, back first. Under the boy’s bewildered gaze, she then started to move her arms and legs rapidly, creating an interesting shape in the snow covered ground. Then she just laid there, a content expression on her face.
Ren raised an eyebrow. “What… was that?”
“Something I haven’t done in some time,” came her reply as she gazed at the sky above. Then she raised her head to look at him. “Don’t tell me you never did a snow angel?”
“No,” was his flat response. “Seems pointless. They will be erased with the next snowfall anyway.”
“It’s for fun.” she said almost chastising. Clearly, he had a different idea of fun than his friends… most likely any people. Then she patted the ground next to her. “You do it too.”
Ren crossed his arms, not giving in. “I don’t fancy wasting my time. Besides you said people are waiting for us.”
“They can wait a little longer.” Meiling replied stubbornly. “Come on… it probably won’t kill you to let loose for a moment.”
Ren regarded her levelly, and it seemed like he would only refuse again. But another second and he unraveled his arms, his sigh creating a mist in front of him. Mirroring her, he fell on the ground. Flailing his arms and legs on the freezing ground felt stupid at the beginning… but soon he was feeling warmth build up inside of him despite the cold. Silly or not, she was right… this had been fun – and light.
“It wasn’t that bad, was it?” Meiling asked in a hushed voice when they were both lying down on the snow. There was a moment of silence.
“No.” Ren replied, equally soft. He felt… fulfilled. He had longed for company in the midst of crowds… and in a way, he had the best. The cold didn’t feel numbing right then… he could almost welcome it.
Maybe they should be heading back… but right now, he didn’t feel any rush.