Chapter Text
Darth Sidious hated Padmé Amidala.
He hated everyone, of course, but the girl he hated most of all. Ever since she was first elected queen she managed to get in the way of almost every single one of his carefully laid out plans. He underestimated her the first time and truly believed that he wouldn’t again. But unfortunately she continued to somehow, beyond all reasonable odds, manage to outwit him without even knowing she was doing so.
He was very grateful when she finally died. That victory was made even better by the effect it had on his apprentice. Still even then, Amidala somehow managed to beat him one last time, though it was many years later.
Two seeds of Padmé Amidala were planted and took root without his knowledge. They each proved to be just as troublesome as her, just now there were two of them.
Her offspring was just as kind and compassionate and determined as she had been. It made Sidious sick to think about. Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa had everything their mother had. He tried to swiftly deal with them by either turning or killing them. But in the end it was Vader’s love for the girl and their son that defeated him.
But not once and for all. Sidious had always prided himself on his ability to plan for any foreseen and unforeseen circumstances. Slowly he began to come back. There was a slight roadblock when his clone first was not Force sensitive and then, for some reason, decided to run away.
Luckily though, that clone foolishly married and had a daughter who was very strong in the force indeed.
A young girl, intelligent and strong of heart, much like Amidala had once been.
This time, he would not underestimate the ways of Amidala. This time he would use them for his own gain. This time it would be a Palpatine who employed all those tricks to get ahead of her enemies. He always used Naboo as a testing ground, she would do that for him. One last time.
~
When he was little, Ben would always ask his mother for stories. Those that she told would always enchant him. Leia had a way with words, she knew how to captivate an audience. It made her a damn good story teller and an even better politician.
She told him about her life as the Princess of Alderaan. Her parents, the Queen who ruled her people with fairness and grace and her husband who fearlessly led the Rebellion behind the scenes. She told him of meeting her husband and brother for the first time, the tragedy of the Death Star, the victory of the war.
Not all the stories she told were from her own life. She also told him about legends and histories. She taught him as much as she could about the force, unless his questions became too far out of her knowledge range, then she’d kindly tell him to ask his uncle instead.
One day, apparently his questions became too much for her and she sent him away to live and train with Luke.
Luke too told stories. This time about his own life. He recounted his journey to becoming a Jedi and what that meant. Ben’s uncle was a strong leader. He couldn’t help but to admire him. Of course, he admired his parents too. However, things were difficult.
One of Ben’s favorite things growing up at the Jedi Temple were the infrequent but still ever exciting visits from Sabine and Ahsoka. Sabine told him all about her adventures and the rebellion. They both told him the long story of the journey to find Ezra and how they finally did and he was fighting a noble fight that they agreed to join. They told him about the Chiss ascendancy and the people there. But, most valuable to him was when Ahsoka sat down and told him stories about his grandparents and his namesake.
It was those stories about Anakin Skywalker that made Ben want to be just like him when he grew up.
Ben started to read books for himself. He read stories about two people who were destined to be together. It made him smile, thinking of his grandparents and everything he heard of their love. He wanted something like that when he grew up but all his own.
In those stories was a word: soulmate. Ben wanted one of those ever since he was little, but even more so when his parents sent him away. Someone who was meant to be his one and only, a lover, a friend, a partner for life. If he found them he wouldn’t feel so alone anymore. Sure he had his family, but for some reason as he grew older he felt as if an invisible wall was being built between himself and them.
Ben thought he might find that person. First it was Poe, then Cheyenne, then Jacen. And none of them worked out. None of them understood him or fit perfectly with him the way he imagined a soulmate would. He was starting to think that maybe soulmates weren’t real. All of the myths about them were just that, myths.
At 22 years old, Ben didn’t think he would ever find that person. At 23 he found out that the people who supposedly loved and cared for him most had been lying to him since the day he was born. Every single one of them had repeated the story that Anakin Skywalker had died at the end of the Clone Wars. He found out that was not true. Anakin Skywalker was Darth Vader.
That wall he felt growing between himself and his family ever since he was 10 years old solidified. So he ran. He stole the Millennium Falcon and flew as far as that old piece of junk would take him. He ran spice and helped pirates. He explored the edges of the galaxy. And he finally crash landed on a desert planet.
Jakku. There his parents loomed over him just like the crashed star destroyers. He was out of money to pay for repairs so he was forced to work off his debt by some crook called Unkar Plut. It was honestly little more than indentured servitude. Dark solutions to his problem had crossed his mind more than once but he didn’t feel it was worth it. The darkness, just like his family, expected too much of him and he wouldn’t fall for its tricks. Not in this life.
However, on Jakku he didn’t have the burden of legacy. A burden which he hadn’t completely realized was weighing on him so much. There his name didn’t mean anything, He was just Ben. Not Ben Solo of House Organa. Not the nephew of the Jedi Grand Master. Not the grandson of a Queen of Naboo and Lord of the Sith. Just Ben.
He thought he would get away with it too. He thought he could just live his life as just Ben. But he should’ve known that the force would always get its way. He should’ve known that the force would want him to be involved. So, while he was annoyed about it, he wasn’t necessarily surprised when a man named Finn and a droid called BB-8 came along constantly going on and on about the Empire and the Rebellion.