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Donatello was being ghosted by a feeling that watched his shell from behind, ready to attack at any given moment. It was truly terrifying when the slime-like touch creeped onto his shell, reminding him of the uncomfortable atmosphere he had to endure during the battle against the Kraang.
The terrapin would struggle to breathe whenever the tentacles tried to tug off his battle shell to get to his sensitive back, desiring to tear him apart from his weakest point. Donatello would bite down to silence his panicked cries, trying to cloud his mind with something other than that horrible feeling against his skin. He didn't want anyone to hear him. He didn't want his family to know he was struggling with something like this- he didn't find it significant enough compared to what they all had to deal with.
Compared to them, Donatello felt insignificant.
Raphael could barely see through his injured eye, his body recovering from how it morphed into a monstrous figure. Leonardo had wounds that barely healed, his insomnia only getting worse with nightmares and yelling thoughts that ravaged his mind. Michelangelo couldn't even use his hands- his fingers and arms were covered in glowing scars that would become bright out of nowhere or when the boy tried to use his mystic gifts.
To them, Donatello had the least to worry about.
Tonight it seemed as if he were to be haunted once more.
The purple clad leaned over his desk, tinkering away at a new security system he was trying to build in hopes of protecting his family. Most of the lair's protective layers were destroyed during the battle, so he wanted to rebuild each and every one of them and more. Donatello was ready to defend his brothers and father at any cost necessary. No matter what it took.
Him losing sleep was more than okay with him since he already barely slept. It was no big deal.
Donatello stuck his tongue out in concentration, eyes squinted as he worked, connecting wires and editing the code that he put into the device. It was small, however, there would be many around the lair, all connected and working as a unit. He thought about adding lasers or some type of weapon to fend off an intruder until he arrived at the fight. Donatello chuckled silently at the thought of seeing a group of rats dancing around shooting lasers. Splinter would either be offended or find the sight funny. Donatello thought about finding out. 'It would be humorous to see Paps trying to not get shot' he thought to himself, keeping another chuckle to himself. Perhaps if he set it up outside of Splinter's room..
Slip..
The boy froze, hands beginning to shake at the familiar sound. Slime-like noises slithered around the laboratory, creeping up behind him slowly as if it were trying to sneak up on him. It wouldn't work. Donatello knew what was coming- it happened every night, sometimes even during the day when he least expected it. He inhaled a shaky breath, carefully placing his tool down to form fists. Nervously, he flexed his fingers, his fists closing and opening repeatedly. He had to stabilize himself- he had to calm down. It wasn't really there- it was just in his head. He was being irrational.
He was fine.
Donatello could feel his breathing rapidly increase, his body shaking when the slimes peeked onto his battle shell, wrapping around every corner. He gasped, his nails digging into the metal under his hands, eyes shutting tightly in an attempt to relax. The soft-shell turtle bit back a sob of desperation, hot tears threatening to fall and soak his mask. It hurt. Everything hurts. He couldn't breath- he couldn't move. His protective shell was being tugged in, his weakness close to being exposed. Donatello whimpered, a hand mindlessly searching around his desk for anything- a knife, a screwdriver- anything!
Everything seemed to be hiding from him.
Unable to take it anymore, Donatello shot up, hurrying to the doors and fumbling to open them before nearly falling onto the ground outside. All he saw was blurred darkness. The ground shook beneath him, causing him to become dizzy. He shook, crawling forwards, wanting to get away from the tentacles that sought after his shell. All he knew was that he had to get away from his lab and to find a safe spot to hide in until he calmed down enough to think straight. But with his current state of mind, moving and hiding had a very low possibility rate.
He just wanted to get away from this haunting touch.
The terrapin curled up into a ball, eyes shut as tight as possible, nails digging into his arms. His shoulders hurt.. His shell hurt.. When was the last time he took his battle shell off?
Donatello couldn't think right now.. Everything was too fuzzy. Maybe he'd just let the slime devour his sensitive shell while he cried silently.
He wouldn't want to wake his family after all. Although, part of him said that there was a low chance that anyone was actually sleeping- especially Leonardo. Perhaps the slider would find his brother there on the floor, going in and out of reality as he tried to escape an invisible attacker?
No no.. That was silly. Leonardo wasn't going to come find him at this ungodly hour.
Donatello was all alone.
The soft-shelled turtle shook on his place on the floor, red marks starting to surface on his arms due to his scratching. His eyelids were heavy as stones upon stones trying to crush his dark orbs into darkness. Donatello liked that idea. He wanted to be surrounded by comfortable black without having to feel anything. Then, he could wake up feeling better and no one would know a thing. Brilliant!
Just when Donatello could even attempt to focus on falling into darkness, something touched him.
It was back.
Donatello curled up further, wishing he could retract into his shell and truly hide in the darkness he so craved. His wrists were grabbed, making a cry leave his throat as he started to struggle. More tears streamed down his cheeks, teeth clenched as he kicked at whatever had him. His silence was replaced by his yelling and sobs, begging to be left alone and untouched. It was too much. His battle shell was digging into his shoulders- it was heavy. His mask felt drenched. His tears were salty and wet. Too much. Too much. Donatello cried, his wrists being held together tightly. He didn't want to go through this. He didn't want to be touched- his shell was too sensitive. It was too much!
"Donnie! Donnie, you need to calm down!"
The terrapin's sob broke, hands clenched into fists. He was shaking so much- it hurt. Everything hurts. He was exhausted.
The voice started speaking again.
"Donnie.. It's me, Leo. Can you take some deep breaths for me? Remember, inhale for two seconds, keep it there for four seconds, and exhale for another two seconds. Can you do that for me?" the voice muttered, his tone soft and gentle. Donatello listened, unsure at first if he should trust the newcomer. He followed the instructions, breathing in for two seconds, holding it for four, then exhaling for another two seconds. He repeated this action slowly, his shaking coming to an end. He felt the hands on his wrists slide to his shoulders, earning a quiet gasp at the touch. His shoulders ache due to his battle shell.
The male peeked through his eyelids to see the familiar face of Leonardo smiling down at him. He wasn't wearing a mask nor any of his equipment in general. Donatello stared at him confusingly, taking a slow look around. He was laying across the blue clad's lap, his own hands resting on the ground. They sat in front of his lab doors, surrounded by the lair's lack of light. Donatello breathed carefully, noticing how he was still shaking. It wasn't nearly as bad as a few minutes ago though. That was a relief.
He glanced back up at his brother, blinking at a snail pace. Leonardo gave a small chuckle, tilting his head. "Hey man.. You look horrible," he muttered, causing Donatello to crack the smallest of smiles.
"Go look in a mirror, Nardo.. Your eyebags could carry groceries," Donatello said, cringing at how hoarse he sounded. The other rolled his eyes, helping the other sit up, taking notice how the purple clad flinched when his hand met the back of his battle shell.
"Do you.. Wanna talk about it?" Leonardo asked, offering a grin that he hoped looked comforting. His brother looked exhausted and shaken. Donatello had immediately shook his head at the question, looking away from his lab doors, finding the floor rather interesting at the moment. The slider hummed, not saying another word. Silence fell between the two for what seemed like endless minutes. Leonardo didn't like silence much.
"My butt hurts sitting on the floor.. I'm heading to the kitchen for some hot chocolate.. You wanna come? It might help." Donatello didn't answer for a few seconds, silently glad that his brother waited patiently for him to respond. Soon enough, he nodded, and carefully placed a hand in Leonardo's outstretched fingers. It was oddly comforting knowing that his 'twin' was so close and patient with him. The soft-shelled turtle quietly followed as his brother led him to the kitchen, the pale light making him squint until he grew used to it. Leonardo headed straight to the hot chocolate ingredients, already starting to make his beverage. Donatello leaned onto the counter for the time being, orbs still heavy.
"I'm making you one too. No sugar right?" Leonardo asked, not looking at the other as he grabbed Donatello's #1 Dancer mug from the cabinet.
"Yeah.. Three of the little marshmallows too."
The two sat in silence as the hot chocolate brewed, the sound of the coffee maker filling the room with a comfortable vibe. Donatello kept his breathing quiet, despite the shakiness of it at times as pain itched at his shoulders. His mask was still wet- it was uncomfortable. He tried to raise his arms to untie his face coverage, hissing when his limps only fell back down. Leonardo glanced at him as he grabbed the now chocolate filled mugs, adding some sugar to his own while adding exactly three small marshmallows to Donatello's. He carried them as he gestured for the other to follow. The purple clad did so without a word, barely noticing how Leonardo led him to his room. The fairy LIGHTS were a nice touch, he thought. He liked the dimmed light.
The slider dragged a box up next to his bed to put the mugs down onto before turning to his brother. "Here, come sit down. I'll take your mask off for you."
Donatello stiffened at the thought of being touched where he couldn't see. He guessed that Leonardo noticed because he smiled gently, sitting and patting the space next to him. "Don't worry, I'll be careful." The shorter of the two hesitated, before nodding and taking a seat next to his brother. Leonardo whispered that he was going to untie the mask now, giving him a warning before pulling the mask tails out of the knot. Donatello gripped the blankets underneath him, feeling his face covered slip off.
"There, all done! I'm putting it over here, okay?" Leonardo said, placing the mask on the box besides the bed. He offered Donatello his mug, saying to be careful as it was hot. He blew on the beverage for a few moments, taking a small sip, a shiver falling down his spine at the warmth that soaked his dry throat. His twin chuckled, following suit. Silence once again covered the atmosphere. It was comfortable, despite the tiredness that hugged Donatello's shell and shoulders. He wished to take his battle shell off.
But he was scared. He was frightened that it would be touched. He didn't want it to hurt- he didn't want to feel the slimy tentacles tugging on his most precious weakness.
Leonardo glanced at his brother, sighing as he leaned back by his hand. "When was the last time you took your battle shell off..?" he asked, voice barely above a whisper. Donatello met his orbs, blinking slowly as he shrugged.
"Three.. Four days ago..? I don't remember. But it's fine- it doesn't hurt much.." Lies.
The slider rolled his eyes, placing his mug down to properly face the other. "That's bull, Donnie, and you know it. You can't sit up straight and it's obvious that it hurts. You need to take it off." Donatello gave Leonardo a glare, his snout scrunching up.
"Oh please- you can't tell me what to do Nardo.. I'm fine, seriously. Just drop it."
He flinched when Leonardo placed his hand on his upper bicep. "Donnie.. Please, just take it off. You're safe here. It's just me and I won't let anything happen to you." Donatello didn't like how Leonardo stopped himself from saying anything else. It was obvious that there was to be another word in that sentence, but he decided not to mention it.
He looked down at the dark drink he held, lips trembling slightly. He didn't want to take his battle shell off. However, if he didn't, the pain would only get worse and he could risk damaging his actual shell or shoulders. He weighed the pros and cons carefully, noticing how he still shook at the thought of his mind attacking him again.
He was safe now, right?
At least for the time being?
Donatello let out a shaky sigh, giving a small nod. "Just.. Please, be careful. Don't touch my shell directly." Leonardo smiled lightly, giving an 'okay' as he moved behind his brother to unlock the protective shell. The shorter of the two was tense and uneasy- he didn't like this. Leonardo gave him a warning as he unclipped the piece of equipment, a choked gasp coming from his twin. He got up to put the shell against the wall, looking back at Donatello who was slouching, his face contorting between relief and pain. The slider frowned, sitting back down and tapping the other's knee. "Hey, come lay down on some pillows. I'll make a barrier around you."
Glad that Donatello didn't argue, he watched as he climbed closer to the wall and carefully laid onto his shell, wincing slightly at the sensitivity. Leonardo made a mental note to look at shell jell- if that was even a thing. He'd look into it later. For now, he needed to get his brother comfortable enough to sleep, the hot chocolate forgotten about.
Creating a small barrier of other pillows and blankets around Donatello, Leonardo made sure that the pile wasn't too heavy or loose. Donatello seemed to grow at ease soon enough, humming at the nice feeling of being surrounded by such coziness. As his eyelids grew heavy enough to fall, he closed his eyes, breathing softly as he started to doze off into a nice slumber. Leonardo rested next to his twin, smiling lightly as he lazily rested a hand on his arm.
"I'm here.. You're safe now, Don. Sweet dreams, bro."