Work Text:
Everyone was giving Ghost dirty looks and he definitely deserved it. In all honesty he didn't know why he said it. Maybe he was having a bad day, but that still isn't an excuse. All he knew is that he broke you. He broke you.
Your eyes didn't have that shine in them as they use to. You barely smile. You barely talk... That's the worst part. You talked all the time. Always entertained the Task Force with stories, jokes, or your random thoughts. Now he has made you revert back into your old ways. The timid, silent, "Speaks when spoken to" you. The main person sending daggers in his direction was Alejandro Vargas. The 141 have been in collaboration for a while now. You and Alejandro seemed to have been getting close. Maybe that is another reason why he snapped. All your attention was on him at that particular moment, but now that he thinks about it that wasn't the case at all. He can still remember how you recoiled and curled in on yourself. Something he knew very well which hurt him even more.
Everyone was sitting at the table in the mess hall. Alejandro and his second in command Rudy were in the UK for a time. Deciding that it would be best if they congregate there before starting a mission that required some of the Mexican Special Forces expertise. You and Alejandro were sitting next to each other with Ghost sitting in front of you. You had been talking to everyone at the table. Well more like talking over everyone, but no one seemed to mind. They knew that you went on tangents on occasion, and they always let you ride it out because of how shy you got afterwards. You get this cute blushy look on your face. As of right now however, Ghost was in the middle of planning a training exercise when he said something that triggered a memory from when you were in boot camp. It has been fifteen minutes and he just snapped.
"So the person who did the least pull ups would have to go streaking around base!" You exclaim.
"Y/-" Ghost was cut off by the groups laugh as you continued.
"But I mean look at these guns!" You say as you flex your arms.
"Y/N we need to fo-" Ghost tries to say. He has a set glare as Alejandro pokes your bicep and you giggle as he shows you his own.
"We nearly tied at thirty, but I did an extra five to rub it in that dudes face!" You say boasting.
You glance at Ghost for a moment and that made him instantly mad. Were you choosing to ignore him? All because you want to boast about some bullshit they have probably heard five different times.
"Y/N! Can you shut the fuck up for five minute and get it through your head that not everything is about you!" The table was immediately silenced.
The mess was equally as quiet. His voice echoed across the entire building. The look of shock on your face was prevalent. Then it turned to hurt, before ultimately turning to sorrow. Your body language morphed into a scared child. You curled in on yourself. You face was red with embarrassment. You clenched your fists around your food tray and bit your lip to the point he was sure was going to bleed. Your head then ducked down to your chest to hide your face.
"S-Sorry sir. I will meet you on the training grounds in 0100 hours as scheduled." You say before swiftly standing up and clambering out of your chair.
The group sees you rush over to the trash can and scrape your half eaten food into it. Then you scamper over to the sink to wash your tray before ultimately running out of the mess hall.
"Not cool Mate..." Ghost heard Soap say from beside him. Soaps voice had lowered an octave.
"She was boasting. We needed to discu-" Ghost was cut off by Alejandro.
"She wasn't boasting Hermano. She was trying to impress you, and I think you just broke her heart." He says as he stands up to follow after you.
Alejandro followed after you as quick as he could. He saw you duck into their specific barracks made for the 141. He followed you quickly into it and then to the shared bathrooms He hesitates for only a moment, but rushes in when he hears the stall doors slam open.
"Y/N?" He asks
When he walks in he hears gagging and the plops of puke entering a toilet mixed with the sounds of choked up sobs. He swiftly comes up behind you and squats then holds your hair up and rubs your back.
"I-I didn't mea-" Gag "I-I won't do it again!" Gag "I-I promise I won't p-please." The sound of more puke entering the toilet echoes throughout the bathroom.
Once you were done Alejandro pulls out a handkerchiefs from his pocket and he guides your body away from the toilet. You end up collapsing against him to which he falls down from his crouched position onto his butt.
"I-I'm sorry! I di-" "Shh it's okay Mi querida" He says as he brings your head to his chest.
He moves your hair from your face before wiping your mouth and chin. He then pockets it again. He adjusts himself so he is leaning against the stall wall with you between his legs. His legs go into the stall next to theirs. Your tears and babbling can't seem to stop so he wraps his right arm around your waist while his other hand goes across your body and entwined in your hair behind your head. He begins to hum and murmur words of encouragement.
Your breathing eventually evens out as murmurs of 'I'm sorry's' fall from your lips.
"You are so strong mi querdia... You have no reason to apologize. He shouldn't have raised his voice like that..." Alejandro whispers.
"N-No... He's right. It's not all about me. I shouldn't talk so much when a superior is around. I was being a disturbance." You say quietly as you sit up and shake off his hold.
Alejandro feels disappointed as your warmth disappears from his chest. "Vida... No he didn't mean it like tha-"
"You might want to change your shirt... I'm sorry for crying like that... It was unprofessional." You mumble.
Your posture still mirroring a scared child despite the words you were saying. You stand up and step over Alejandros legs and exit the stall, then out the door.
You had been this way for a month now and it really did a number on the 141's mood, but never have you been so deadly on the field. The change in you was scary and very instantaneous. It got to the point that. that's all the group would talk about. Like they are doing now as you are keeping watch.
"She didn't laugh at the meme I made..." Gaz says quietly. His face glum and his shoulders slouched. "All she did was grunt in response before carrying on with her ammo counting."
Alejandro just sat there glaring at Ghost while Ghost sat and glared at him, but Alejandro won this staring contest.
"She doesn't laugh anymore." Soap says.
"I wonder why!" Alejandro snips.
"Alejandro not no-" "Yes now! This cabrón hasn't apologized yet!" He says cutting Gaz off.
Ghost only meets his eyes again with a glare.
"The reason she hasn't talked to any of us is because WE are all her superior." The group looks at him confused.
"What does that have to do with anything?" Soap asks.
"We... We had a mome-" He sighs. "It isn't my place to tell but I will say that you..." He says turning his head to Ghost. "Triggered some form of childhood trauma, y quiero patearte el culo, perra estúpid-"
Alejandro is cut off by Rodolfo. "Calm down Colonel... She will get back to herself eventually..." He says soothingly.
"Anyway! We need to focus on the mission. I am going to go relieve Y/N of her watch." Gaz says as he stands up and walks in your direction.
The group then goes silent. There are murmurs from your direction before you come over and sit down. You have developed a new posture since the argument as well. Shoulders are now very tense and in a hunched position unless you are addressed directly. Eyes always pointed at the floor, and your fingers picking at your cuticles. Alejandro and Ghost both look at you for a moment and as if you are feeling their gaze you curl even deeper.
"Think it's best we rest for the night." Soap murmurs and you nod.
You roll out your small sleeping bag toward the edge of camp, but still in the fires light. You turn with your back facing the camp and try to relax. That is until you feel footsteps and then some dirt of someone plopping down their sleeping bag. You could tell by the pattern of their steps that it was Ghost. You decide to keep your eyes closed and pretend you are asleep, but Ghost knows better. He lays down about a foot away from you with his back facing yours. He isn't going to go to sleep, but He feels like this is the necessary privacy he needs to have a small talk.
"I should have spoke to ya sooner..." He starts. "I was a proper wanker and I'm sorry... "
He takes in a deep breath. " I am not going to talk to you in detail now since we are on a mission, but... Don't let that light die in you because of me..." He then is silent and he shifts onto his back.
"I destroy a lot of things... The last thing I want to do is destroy you..." He finishes.
The night then went on to be silent. The fire crackling and the birds in the surrounding forests were slowly falling asleep and like those birds so did you.
