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“I WANNA SEE YOU BLEED!! COME TO ME, MY TENDER SWEET MEATS!!”
The screams of terror spread throughout the camp as the alarm was raised - a burly intruder was slicing through the bandits with his buzz axe, which was now stained with red. Bodies littered the battlefield, their intruder stepping on and over them like they were nothing. The badass who led these bandits groaned - knowing the bandits’ stupidity, the surviving members wouldn’t last much longer, two seconds, tops. He propped up his shield where the midget was strapped, who was perking up from his slumber to scream profanities at him, wailing with misfortune. The badass nomad just laughed, lumbering outside to see very few of his men left standing, some of which were running past him.
“You idiots!! I’ll teach y’all how to squish an insect.” The badass bellowed, turning to his opponent, drawing his weapon.
Krieg laughed maniacally, eye twitching as the new enemy drew near. Another meat for the slaughter? That was fine by him. ‘You won’t be able to take this one, you’ve lost too much blood.’ His inner personality warned him, though he was unsurprised when he was completely ignored, the Psycho pounding the blunt end of his axe into his hands, brandishing it at the sky.
“TIME TO CRACK OPEN YOUR RIBCAGE, BADASS!” With that, he launched himself at his foe, only to be met by his midget shield, slamming into it. The nomad swung his shield with incredible force, flinging Krieg into a wall. The Psycho stumbled as a spray of bullets embedded themselves into his skin. Krieg clenched his teeth, spitting up blood, which dribbled down his face from the edges of his mask. ‘I told you so.’ “SHUT UP!!” Krieg snapped, growling as he stood up on wobbling, aching legs. The inner personality quieted, helpless to watch as his other personality attacked the badass relentlessly, regardless of his well-being.
With a vicious roar, he threw all of his strength into his buzz axe, the spinning blade catching at the chains imprisoning its midget. The bandit squeaked with glee, squirming at his restraints as the chains started to break. The nomad scoffed, bashing Krieg with his shield again as the smaller of the two bandits was launched free, screeching with utter delight at his newly found independence. It was short-lived, unfortunately, as the nomad bashed the midget in the head with his heavy shield, knowing the midget would only attack him. He had to focus on the task at hand.
‘Well, I guess this is the end. This life was nice while it lasted,’ the inner personality thought as Krieg launched himself at the nomad once again, only to be bashed with his shield and thrown into the dirt. More sprays of bullets whizzed past Krieg, some hitting their mark in his skin. ‘You’ve lost too much blood, big guy.’ Krieg howled in anger, refusing to give up, despite his inner personality telling him the truth. Torrents of bullets came his way, and he lazily dodged them, pain hissing through his entire body. It was getting more and more difficult to stand with every move he made. ‘Was it worth it?’
“THE PAIN NEVER ENDS, THE WAR GOES ON, FOREVER, AND EVER!!!” He screeched, gasping for air at intervals, snarling and gnashing his teeth. The nomad chuckled, walking up to him with a confident gait, knowing the Psycho wouldn’t last much longer. Krieg collapsed to the ground, too many bullets in his legs, his wounds covered in dirt, which only worsened the pain. He looked up at the badass with a snarl, who had a pistol pointed straight to his head. The nomad pulled the trigger - the bullet pierced his brain, his body slumping to the ground lifelessly as blood poured from the hole in his head.
What greeted Krieg was darkness, pure and utter darkness, and echoing cold. All he could do was hold himself, hugging his knees up to his chest, shuddering and salivating, fear, anticipation, anxiety, and anger all cycling through him like a tornado. ‘We knew this would happen eventually. Was this what you wanted all along?’ The inner personality was deeply saddened by the turn of events, knowing he’d never get his chance to find out if he would ever become even slightly closer to normal. ‘We could have had it good, you know that? Why couldn’t you just let us have that…!!’ He let out a crying roar in the echo of Krieg's mind, upset at the loss. They’d never feel the sun on their backs again, or hear that satisfying chnk when their buzz axe sank into the flesh of the deserving… or that cool Pandoran breeze on those particularly hot days in the Dust. His other personality was strangely quiet other than his strange snarling and shuddering, perhaps his own way of crying.
The initial anger and sorrow eventually wore off, the pain numbing to a throb. ‘Is this what Hell is like? Huh. Thought there’d be more fire.’ Krieg laughed to himself, continuing to shudder in the freezing dark.
It felt like years but was probably only a few minutes until light enveloped them. Krieg’s bones and muscles and skin rematerialized, and he writhed in pain, everything feeling like burning compared to the cold darkness he had only just become accustomed to. He collapsed to the dirt, laying there trying to understand what just happened. Even the inner personality was stunned, unsure what just happened. ‘Were we just given… a second chance…?’
“The Hyperion corporation wishes to clarify that the bright light you saw after death was our digistruct technology, and not a higher power.” A woman’s voice said in a cheerful tone from behind them. Krieg’s head swiveled to see the strange technology, labeled “New-U Station,” with a blinking antenna above them. “Not higher than Hyperion, anyway.”
He scrambled up to stare at it, awed speechless. Of course it had something to do with Hyperion, who -- “SILENCE!! I will strangle the memories of you with a CHAINSAW to the jellied monstrosities of youth…!” Krieg screamed threateningly, trying to suppress the memories, holding the sharp end of the buzz axe to his head. He seemed to feel better real fast upon learning that he was actually alive again. When the Little Man went quiet again, he bashed the side of the machine with one foot. Getting no response, he snarled at it, glancing around with his eye to get a handle on where he was.
After all, there was a badass nomad he needed to pay a nice visit to.