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Niner shivered under the showerhead pelting hot water onto him, rubbing the soap suds up and down at his ribcage. Standard GAR soap would be expected but Ordo’s gift giving through Fi has perks.
The smell of charcoal fizzled in bubbles around his nose, his chin, his t-brow, dripping down his eyelids out of sight into shower water. Just the kind hand to the weariness of resting on ground zero. Just that. Waiting.
Waiting for the next pin drop, waiting for news of some wayward assignment from General Zey; waiting for more osik to hit the fan between his team and Delta. Though not as often nowadays thanks to their forced intermingling.
There still lies this hesitant tension between him and Boss paths before it’s bubble pops, leaving some fluttery what now pause in it's wake.
Lately he'd assumed their tango bladed showoff at CSF would’ve dull it, the mixed mingling between dinner and late meals would dull it; even damn limmie could settle the unease in his stomach whenever they’d gather together. The ka’ra sake at least on assignment staking his life on a task doesn’t make him feel so,
Not off, no, no.
No, not off weren't the right words anymore.
What would Ordo call it- testing his intelligence score? Well, maybe in matters of.. piecing things like this together (feelings wise). He might have this one up on Kal Null, but thats sucidical talk for any vod to say aloud; and one with a taste for an early demise. He'll keep both lips sealed unless he wanted a good smash to the floor via Ordo kama skirt. That fabric is intimidating.
“Don’t whine.” Niner scolded himself, scrubbing the last of the charcoal smell off himself. “The others don’t need your melodrama mixed with everything."
Peering downward squint eyed, he wasted no more time to absorb the shower’s warmth, watching the soap suds taking a swift exodus down his body to his ankles, dissolving in the white porcelain floors. Thirty seconds later he was standing in dissolving steam fog.
The warmth was fleeting in that quiet bathroom of peace he gained. Sighing he got out, but not before again reaching for his ribcage. He feels warm, yet the warmth he desires wasn’t there. Another louden sigh, in no time he left the bathroom in sleep shorts and one burrowed shirt, sleepily stepping for bed.
“Going to sleep Nines?” He heard, looking up to Atin passing him in their hallway to go out, casually dressed in clothes Niner knows he’s hadn’t peeked before. Ordo influence strikes again.
Atin normally pensive stare was replaced with concern, dipping his head down to investigate his fellow vod in arms. The cut of his trousers and button down struck an impressive figure on his well muscular form but that mischievous familiar kindness in his eyes called him home.
“Feeling off.” Niner croaked, attempting to smile Kal’buir style at him. “Be assuring like Kal’buir, just confirm assurance like he does- Go have fun okay? Tell Laseema I said hi.”
“Sure but are you…. good? You look off, like that sniveling Vau shrill when it needs to shit.” Atin stated, bringing his palm to Niner forehead. “We can’t get sick so maybe you caught the uglies virus from the Delta hog heads.”
Niner eyes fluttered under his warming palm touch and repeal shuddering. "Just pack it own and in, don’t be a hindrance, it can affect your team-"
“No hog heads shabuire for once.” Niner joked reaching to smack his hand. “Only me being dumb, go have fun. I’ll sleep it off.”
“Ni-ni the day you decide you're legally dumb will be the day Mereel calls hail Maria and joins the Chandrila theater.” Atin cracked making Niner stifle in laughter. “Don’t wait up, but I’ll leave it to you okay? Aalar jate’shya.”
Niner opened his mouth to correct him but pause, picking on how warm he actually felt under Atin hands and tried again.
“I’ll be okay.” Niner assured, swallowed at the hand retreating away. He almost wanted to pull it back and let more of his warmth swallow him. Like a needy child wanting extra attention after their buir or ori’vod already gave up sparse free time for attention.
“Go At’ika, have fun.” He nudged him away, making way back to their bunks without stopping. “If you love me bring warra nuts back, Obrim can hook you up I bet.”
“Yeah if you want!” Atin called after him, his voice bouncing off their quieted hallway. Niner managed a shaky okay hand gesture right as he turned the corner to his and Fi room. Hopefully Atin caught it.
Not minding who occupied his and Fi room Niner shuffled to bed, throwing himself onto his bunk with a low moan of suffering. Sheltered under a coarse blanket with nothing to cling onto, he tried dozing off.
Yet Niner for all he pushed could not sleep. He could only laid there, tossing and turning recklessly; thoughts churning like the machinery gimmicks of the many elevators he’d passed at Quilra shopping mall. Passing by their translucent mirrors in his civilian disguise use to bother him playing pretend with strangers. Acting like they had the capabilities to live a normal life how these those civilian do, it was a unease he’s try shrugging off to no avail.
His hand knuckles knocked his dimmed lit data tablet skewed aside his bunk wall and reach to grab it. Wincing at the assaulting lights he winced and quickly lower it and made way to the shared music library Fi sent him some time back. Resettling himself under his blanket he closed his eyes recalling the time he first saw it.
“When you get too much in your head Niner sometimes you stress us out by default.” Fi cheerfully winked from his side of the room as Niner whistled over the impressive size file of music options.
He was in bed, ready to crash after eighteen-one-too-too-many exercises that left them all bone weary. How Fi summoned the energy to smile was beyond him, though it wasn’t discouraged.
“What's all this Fi?” Niner asked staring over his data tablet. Glancing over it he peeked names from song tracks and holo-films he’d yet to watch and likely won’t, knowing himself.
“Listen to this instead of drowning in your gloom Nines, you know how you get moody sometimes. And don’t you know worrying makes you age faster?” Fi laughed at himself pleased, stretching his hamstring out on his bunk with simple ease. “Well, that Mirialan beauty advertisement said any how..” Fi stopped, sheepishly rubbing his forehead. “Yeah do or don’t it’s no hard feelings.”
He must really like him enough to put this together and the thought made Niner throat swell up. Perhaps his team indeed likes him.
“When I out-do you in the beauty pageant because I listen to your music don’t be upset.” He recalled grinning then, flicking through the playlist forefinger steady. “Be prepared for direct sabotage.”
The smile Fi gave him was enough to counter the dissipating fog sitting lukewarm in his chest.
“Ni-ni? Hey.” A hand tapped the metal of his bed off-beat, pulling him from his doze. Huh, guess he was starting to sleep good.
Niner sluggishly peek his head out from his blankets, curls sprawled messily from his cocoon to find Fi standing aside his bunk. He had changed from his gym wear to more familiar sleep wear, striped red socks included.
“I’m coming in make way.” Fi announced cheekily pulling the blankets back. “Atin caught me coming in, said you’re stressed bad.”
“…..What.” Niner rasped out rubbing his eyes to adjust to the window lights coming through. It must’ve been one hour since he laid down. “I was literally sleeping it off….. your too big for us both up here.”
“You talk a lot of osik for someone supposedly knocked out.” Fi said waving the blanket around Niner’s legs as if airing washed laundry. “And I told you already I ain’t big, I’m thick bone with lots of love to give.” Assuredly stating this Fi pulled his leg up to nudge Niner stomach. His persistent kicks were enough to jolt Niner from his doze, making him jerk over to the wall whereas his noisy guest made way in grins abound.
Cheeky fucker.
“Mmmm Fi.” Niner couldn’t help a low sigh of resignment over the matter. He waited for him settling in before kicking him rightfully so back. “That’s, that’s the problem.” He yawned out tiredly.
“What is?” Fi asked lying down facing him, his own warmth calling to Niner. “If this is about my love curves, thanks! I get it from mama naturally.”
“No jackass I mean I think.. thinking about things makes me feel weird.” Niner grunted, propping himself up on his elbows with a sleep mused face.
“That’s good?” Fi questioned. “Tell me that’s good or disaster level bad.”
"I don’t know and it’s annoying.” Left Niner muffled, his face pressed in his pillow. “It’s stressing me out and I don’t want Kal’buir to get gung-ho about me sipping like this. I might get you all caugh- “
“Nuh uh, no buir, this is about us.” Fi stated opening his arms up. “So while you’re all overthinking as the great, never-ending leader of the GAR Omega Commando squad come over here won’t ya? Give me some sugar for my sweetheart~.”
“Ka’ra Fi.” Niner mustered out a laugh letting himself curl closer. Shifting down to Fi own ribcage he wrapped his arms around Fi torso, entangling his knees between Fi sweatpants covered one.
“You’re lucky your loveable.” Niner said muffled in Fi shirt fabric, clutching its cotton fabric between his fingers. Fi smelt of something lighter than the charcoal scrub bar still on the shower self.
“Now you’re making me shy Ni-ni!” Fi laughed wrapping his arms about Niner’s shoulders to rest his hand through Niner hair. “Was it always your job to be all broody and strict like buir or is that still off the table?”
“All three of you can do it, it’s expected more on me.” Niner said.
“Says who?”
“Me.” He deadpan, smiling to the snort of amusement leaving their team’s sniper.
“Well you’re the best, toughest cyare we got, got it?” Fi trailed though washed hair curls. “Be lost without your direct-directionzing.”
“Ade you do that on your own just fine.” Niner muffled out. “Don’t be shocked if messing with Sev gets you like this too.”
“Sergeant Niner Skirata are you being cheeky with me? I didn’t teach you that.” Fi squeezed him tight. “What boys you been hanging around with huh? I’m going to entice a private investigation… though in the hypothetical, the wildest shot, the longest one in a millionth chance I get to that point."
"You hate doing long-range math outside your station."
"Bro I mean it, if and I mean if." Fi heavily stressed. "If i hit the point of no return? The point of, I don't know, maybe get a little crazy...I’ll come to you just like this and maybe, maybe have a little cry.”
“Just a little.” Niner mumbled. "For what, I'm okay keeping out your business, unless." He cleared his throat, wondering why the room grew so tense. "Unless I'm doing it too?"
Fi stared down to him with understanding in his unsaid melancholy and smirked.
“If I come to you like this and you don't reject me, to me," Fi started, a strained husk covering his words. "It means you're probably trying to shut me up, or you're already crying a little something about Boss.” he whispered, wincing at Niner freezing up. “A sniper sees all, not just what he wants remember? Dar thinks its sweet though Atin.” He sucked in a breath, giving another silent squeeze. “ Bet my verpine it’s me over you more he'd bitch at.”
“Gedetye, gedetye, not now.” Niner mumbled quietly into their hug. Hearing one of his teammates confront him like this made him want to fade into the crumple folds of his blanket, never to return. “He makes my head hurt.”
“Okay Ner’ika, no boy talk.” Fi assured, kissing his crown unexpectedly, making Niner spook enough to quicken his heart. “When Atin comes back from seeing his girl we’ll drag him in for funsies. Our fun insider critic, won’t that be fun?”
“Ni aalar guuror osik.” Niner said annoyed with himself and Fi held back laughing from the sheer done in his voice. “I’m bothering everyone being weird, you should be enjoying your off night more.”
“Shhhhh rest now. Ni ganar gar resol.” Fi uttered, reaching vainly for Niner tablet tucked by his mushed pillow, powering it on to the dimmest light setting. Bracketing Niner in his embrace he didn’t comment on the nuzzling he felt on his stomach.
“You’re lucky you’re cute.” Fi thought biting his tongue at the faint whine he heard cupping the back the of Niner scalp with fingers calloused from a tough soldier’s life. “I’m exactly where I need to be stationed so accept your fate."
“Gar’re te jatne.” Niner mumbled closing his eyes. “I don’t deserve you all.”
“Shush yes you do. Sleep.” Fi said rubbing a particular spot that made Niner melt like starch paper wrapping off frozen butter.
Tucked precariously from observant eyes of vod and strangers alike with the loudness of the world, Niner slept. Squished face first to Fi stomach, he was encased in his familiar smell of gunmetal and soap and cut meiloorum fruit. Not the charcoal one he knew but Fi regardless smelled and felt like familiar frothy warmth now clinging to his ribcage and gathered in his belly.
The grey static noise and hum of Triple Zero dimmed away in their shared bunk. And that way it stayed.