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It was that time of morning when the breeze smelled of dew and the quiet mumble of a waking city was echoing in the streets of downtown San Francisco.
Cosima inhaled the air as she awaited a train; it was refreshing but it was by no means as close to what a cup of coffee could do to awaken her. She watched as the sun leaked in between the cracks of crowded buildings. There was something about the dawn that made the rest of the day more hopeful.
The train screeched to a halt. Cosima grabbed a handful of Clipper cards from her bag; she was unsure of which ones still had money on them, but knew there had to be at least one.
As she tried to find an empty seat on the train, she found herself looking at the endless line of tired, sleepy faces — the aura was contagious. Cosima let out a big yawn and lost her balance as the train began to move. She found herself unintentionally stumbling into a seat between two other people. Squished into an awkward sandwich, Cosima decided to glare at her phone to avoid any conversation.
The train made its second stop and suddenly Cosima felt a tug coming from underneath her.
“Excuse me, you are sitting on my jacket,” said the person that was sitting next to her.
“Oh, I’m so sorry!” Cosima immediately jumped up. She looked at the person who was talking to her. The sunlight that seeped in from the windows of the train illuminated the woman now standing before her. She was tall with golden, curly, hair that fell just above her shoulders. The sunlight shone into her eyes too, enhancing their color; they reminded Cosima of autumn.
For a moment, Cosima wasn’t sure where she was. She just kept staring at the beautiful woman before her.
“That’s okay.”
When the woman smiled softly at Cosima she didn’t feel butterflies, no, she felt somersaults in the pit of her stomach. Cosima watched as she exited the train. The woman looked back at her, still smiling, and Cosima shyly averted her gaze. She could feel the blood rushing to her face.
Am I blushing?!
Cosima sat back down, unsure of how to process what had just happened or how to settle her rapid heartbeat. She was used to seeing pretty girls and admiring them but this one was different. Cosima kept replaying the moment in her head over and over again. She slumped against her seat.
I’m so stupid! Why did I just stare?
“Hey,” a grumbly voice brought Cosima out of her trance. “Can you move your wallet, it’s taking up the seat and some people are trying to sit.” She looked up at the man who seemed agitated, his eyes were staring at the seat next to her. Cosima followed his gaze and surely enough, there was a brown leather wallet.
“Uh, yeah. Yeah sure — sorry about that.” Cosima quickly snatched the wallet. It was her only clue, and she could not help but smile like a little girl who just received a puppy.
Cosima was determined to find the beautiful stranger.
Cosima could feel the low rumble of the train course through her as she anxiously awaited the next stop.
She kept staring at the brown leather wallet in her hands. Conflicted with the morality of opening it, she justified this invasion of privacy with the fact that there had to be information inside that would help her return it to its rightful owner.
Cosima took a deep breath and unzipped the wallet. Inside she found some cash, a few gift cards to clothing stores and chain coffee shops. Cosima found what she was looking for tucked into one of the slit pockets.
“Delphine,” she whispered as she read the name off of a french identification card. A smile appeared on Cosima’s lips.
The train stopped. Cosima hurried off so that she could figure out a plan on tracking down the beautiful stranger.
Maybe I’ll just walk back towards the last train stop. I’m bound to run into her, right?
Wrong.
Cosima spent almost an hour wandering back and forth between the train stops.
She passed the baseball stadium where groups of people in their GIANTS uniforms were already starting to crowd. Cosima wondered if she would find Delphine there, in the mess of orange and black. She felt her heart skip a beat every time she caught a glimpse of blonde hair.
Convinced that Delphine was probably not a baseball fan, Cosima wandered up Embarcadero. She felt a wave of nostalgia as she walked past the exploratorium— the place that opened her to the wonders of science. She gazed at the building remembering how as a child this was the place she begged her parents to take her every weekend.
Suddenly, someone bumped into her shoulder.
“Ahh!” Cosima cried out, exaggerating her pain.
“I’m so sorry!” The man said with a look of concern. This expression quickly changed as he looked at the face of the woman he bumped into. “Wait,” he began with a careful tone, “don’t I know you?”
“I don’t think so?” Cosima said, examining his face and trying to dig deep into her memories, but she came up short.
“Hmm, you just— you just look so familiar.” He kept staring at Cosima with an innate curiosity. After a moment of uncomfortable silence, mostly felt on Cosima’s part, he finally broke his gaze. “I’ll figure it out,” he said. A smile appeared on the man’s face, something similar to determination; he had truly meant it.
“Yeah, you do that,”Cosima muttered as she started walking away. “Man, people are weird,” she added.
The air that was once full of hope and adventure was now masked by the murky scent of the sea breeze. Cosima could hear the noise of blurred conversation and the cries of seagulls that flew overhead. She felt a wave of uncertainty in her gut that was almost nauseating. She wasn’t sure if this was the right choice, and that maybe she should drop her cult movie plot adventure and leave the wallet at a police station.
Cosima decided to clear her head with a cup of much needed coffee. Luckily for her, there was a small coffee shop that she used to frequent just a block away.
When she entered the shop the smell of roasted coffee beans were already heightening her senses. She figured this the unhealthy signs of an addiction but quickly discarded the thought.
Cosima approached the counter and met the polite, familiar, face of the woman who worked there.
“Hey, haven’t seen you in a while!” The cheerful voice made Cosima cringe — she wasn’t in the mood for happy people. “Do you want the regular?”
“Actually I could really use an espresso,” said Cosima bleakly.
“Tough morning?” The woman’s cheerful smile was now a pout with exaggerated concern.
“Every morning is a tough morning for a hopeless romantic,” Cosima chuckled, trying to make light of the honesty in her words.
“Well, you’re not wrong,” the woman responded, adding a coy laugh.
In a cozy booth adjacent to a large window, Cosima watched the once quiet streets become a steady stream of moving people. She could easily tell the tourists apart which entertained her for a while as she sipped her espresso.
Something caught her eye in the blur of people — A tall woman with curly, blonde hair. Cosima’s heart started to race. She felt the strong urge to run out of the shop and chase after the blonde. Perhaps she would have if the woman hadn’t turned around and met Cosima’s stare with dark blue eyes. She quickly looked away.
Fool.
Cosima sighed. She walked out of the shop with a new sense of lost hope.
Cosima found herself wandering towards the pier. She could smell the salty ocean, and watched the boats swaying with the gentle wind. Her mind was thinking about where she was in terms of her accomplishments — a common symptom of any failed ambition.
“Are you having a bad day too?” Cosima turned to meet the face behind the comment.
“Oh my god!” Cosima blurted out.
“I’m sorry, I did not mean to startle you,” Delphine began before she eyed Cosima curiously, trying to remember how she knew her.
“No, it’s not that— well yeah actually you kind of did but it’s just that I’ve sort of been looking for you everywhere.” Cosima was rambling.
Delphine’s eyebrows burrowed.
“Oh, no, don’t give me that look. I’m not weird I swear!” Cosima began to dig through her bag.“You left this on the train this morning.” Cosima handed Delphine the wallet.
“Mon dieu! Oh, Merci!” Delphine grabbed Cosima and hugged her tightly, “I’m so happy I could just kiss you!”
Cosima could feel the blood rushing to her face again.
Fuck.
“ I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. You just made my day so much better.” Delphine smiled.
“I’m glad to help,” Cosima shrugged, trying to remain calm on the outside but her stomach was doing somersaults again.
“How did you know you would find me?” Delphine asked, more out of general curiousity than doubt.
“I didn’t, actually. I thought I’d get lucky if I walked towards the stop you got off at, but it didn’t really work out.”
“Well, I’m glad my wallet was picked up by you,” Delphine pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, “I’m glad I decided to talk to you.”
The two shared a moment of awkward silence, realizing the impossibility of their coincidence.
“Are you busy right now? I would really like to thank you somehow.” Delphine kept looking at Cosima with admiration. Cosima couldn't help notice Delphine's smile. She had this soft smile that never faltered. The same one that Cosima first saw on the train that drove her crazy.
“No, I’m super available.” Cosima said without realizing the double implication.
“Perfect! I know this crepery near by. They’re not like the ones my mom makes, but when I miss home I like to go there.”
“Yeah, that sounds awesome.” Cosima shyly smiled at Delphine, glad that the frenchwoman didn’t catch her word slip.
The two began walking together, joining the flow of people on this busy San Francisco day. Cosima wasn’t sure how, but she knew that Delphine was going to ruin her.