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John beamed unsteadily at Greg. “You’re my mate, you are. And I really, really love you.” He staggered a bit closer. “I love your hair. And your eyes. And your arse…”
“That’s lovely. Thank you,” said Greg, as he tried to remove John’s hands from the specified body part.
Greg’s best friend Andy sniggered.
John abruptly removed his hands himself and spun round to face Sherlock.
“And you’re my best friend in the whole, wide world.” He stared at Sherlock intently. “But I like Greg even bester. Is that OK?”
“It is, John,” said Sherlock, solemnly.
“You’re a good man, Sherlock Holmes. A good, good man.”
John pressed his face into Sherlock’s chest and attempted to pat him somewhere in the vicinity of his right shoulder.
Greg glared at Sherlock over John’s head. “I am going to kill you for this.”
Sherlock glared right back. “I told him I was conducting an experiment. I told him not to drink from that bottle. This is not my fault!”
“Oh!” John looked up from Sherlock’s chest and turned back to Greg. “Almost forgot. I’m going to love you for forever and ever and ever. And ever.”
He smiled at Greg in satisfaction.
“Thank you very much.” And Greg once again concentrated on removing John’s hands from his bottom.
A short distance away, under a splendid hat, Mrs. Hudson watched the four men and furrowed her brow.
“It’s not the most conventional set of wedding vows, is it?” she whispered.
“Mm,” said Mrs. Turner.