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He is always told his accent gives him away, with a good-natured laugh. His superiors usually smile indulgently when they hear the slight drawl to his words, “Ah, a cowboy. Explains your flying son”.
He only smiles in reaction. He quickly learned that to just let people draw their own conclusions will work out in his favour. Hangman is a good ol’ southern boy. Hangman is a Cowboy. Hangman was probably raised on a farm and calls woman ‘ma'am’ unironically. Hangman is the poster boy for the goddamn American dream. Hangman is untouchable.
Jake Seresin grew up in a small flat in downtown Austin Texas. In walking distance to bars and liquor stores, which is just about the only relevant criteria his father had for their living situation. His mother left them when he was two and Jake knows better than to ask about her.
Jake knows he can’t complain that his dad forgets that he exists most of the time, just like he forgets to buy food or to pay the electricity bill on time. His dad is not a mean drunk and has never raised a hand against him. Some of the kids in his neighbourhood are not as lucky and there are worse things than to be ignored.
The first twelve years of his life are uneventful and pretty lonely.
He has some kids he hangs out with after school but that camaraderie is more about being out of their parents way than about real friendship. The only time he spends with his father is when they watch movies when the money for booze runs out. They always watch war movies but he doesn’t mind and when he tells his dad he wants to be a navy pilot, his dad actually smiles at him.
When Jake turns thirteen and all his classmates start having crushed and even dating, a fear blooms in his chest. He worries that deep down he is just incapable of loving someone or maybe just incapable of being loved. It’s hard to tell the difference as a thirteen-year-old who never has experienced either.
That fear stays with him, buried in his ribcage, until college, where he meets his roommate.
Becoming friends with Javy heals that part of him - mostly. For all his faults and flaws, there is no doubt that he loves his best friend with all that he has. And that relieves him even more than being important to someone in return. That he can love someone truly, despite his parents never showing him how.
It scares him, to care that much about a person and he is an asshole about it in the beginning, especially until he figures out the difference between platonic and romantic love. When he manages to untangle that knot and stops being terrified, he is so glad that the Machado’s raised a son as stubborn as a mule and not willing to give up on him, no matter how hard he pressed.
At first, he lets Javy think that he was struggling to come to terms with being gay, and that was why he pushed him away. It’s only in their last year of college that he tells him about how he grew up. The next holidays he is invited to stay with the Machado’s and every single freak out he has about that is worth it because he is finally learning what home means.
The first time someone just assumes he is an all-American farm boy he is too baffled to correct them. Navy people are gossips, it turns out and before Jake knows it, it’s what everyone thinks. People view him differently, his supervisors think “Cowboy” before they think “loose cannon”, so he runs with it. The only person who knows the truth is Javy, who would never rat him out.
By the time he meets Bradley Bradshaw – Rooster, he already learned to imply just the right things for people to draw the conclusions he wants them to.
They fall together fast and fall apart even quicker. It’s what happens when two people refuse to talk about their past. A part of Jake still feels guilty because he knows Bradley thinks it was mostly his own inability to talk about anything real that doomed them, but they are equally to blame. Jake never told him that his scheduled call once a week was with Javy’s grandmother or that the drawing on his fridge was from little Mila Machado, and not from family back in Texas, and Bradley never asked.
So it’s not his first and only real romantic relationship that brings the tower of cards tumbling down, but his second confirmed air combat kill and saving Rooster and Mavericks life. Because now the navy has decided to give out medals to all the aviators involved and they are allowed to invite family to the ceremony.
….
Jake is still staring at the form when Javy finds him. He sits down on the couch next to him and plucks it out of his hands.
“You could just say your parents are busy, you know.”
It’s a thought Jake himself has had, but something is stopping him.
“I know but I actually want to invite Grammy, if she’s not busy.”
Javy beams at Jake, like he always does when the blond acknowledges that he is an honorary Machado. It took them years to get to this point and the novelty still hasn’t worn of.
“Like she would ever be too busy for you. We all know you are her favourite.”
Jake smiles at that, small and pleased, and bumps Javy’s shoulder with his own, “that’s because I call once a week like a good grandson.”
“That’s because you will gossip with her about her neighbours that you never even meet.”
“I am invested now. I need to know how Louise’s affair is going to play out.”
That earns him a snort from Javy. According to Grandma Machado, her neighbourhood was more entertaining than any Soap Opera, the only one to buy into that however was Jake.
“So maybe it’s time to be more honest about your upbringing. Not like the daggers are going to care”, he suggests gently.
Jake sighs. “Yeah, I guess. I just don’t want to deal with the questions.”.
“Are you worried Rooster is going to ask about it?”
Jake shrugs, “He never has before.” And he is not sure if he wants that question answered. It would not be easy to talk about but Bradley not caring enough to even ask would be even worse.
Javy thinks about that before replying, “Yeah, but he’s different now. Done some growing as a person, starting to unpack his baggage and all. Maybe you should do that too. Who knows what could happen?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Javy gives him a look. “It means that you two are about as subtle as a kick in the teeth. Now that you’re apparently done with the homoerotic antagonism, you’re right back to the pining looks.”
“Javy, what the fuck?” Jake sputters completely caught off guard.
His best friend raises his hands in defence, “Just being honest.”
…
After they were dismissed, Phoenix jogs to catch up with Bradley, “Hangman was being weird about the family invites. What’s up with that? Didn’t he grow up on a farm with like a million siblings?”
She can’t deny feeling curious, for as long as she’s known Hangman, she still doesn’t really get him.
“I don’t know actually.”
“You dated for months. How can you not know?” Phoenix can’t help but feel slightly judgemental, “that’s first date small talk.”
“I avoided talking about my family so much, I never asked about his. But he never mentioned sibling,” Rooster frowns “or growing up on a farm, come to think of it.”
“Huh, well, you going to ask now?”
Ever since the mission, he feels like a huge weight has lifted off his shoulders, and Jake has stopped trying to goad him into a fight every time they are in a room together. And if trying to ignore how he still feels about Jake has been hard when the blond was actively trying to piss him off, it is pretty much impossible when he genuinely smiles at him again. It still makes Rooster weak in the knees.
“I‘m not sure it’s my place. We’re just starting to be friendly again, I don’t want to ruin it.”
Now Phoenix is really judging him. “If you avoid any conversation about real stuff, how are you going to tell Hangman that you’re still I love with him?”
Bradley’s ears turn bright red, “What the fuck, Phoenix?”
In return he just gets a raised eyebrow.
…
The day the ceremony happens, Jake is nervous but also excited. He hasn’t seen the Machados in person for a long time and the whole family was coming when they heard that Jake was receiving a medal. Jake is honoured and overjoyed that they all made the trip to San Diego just for him. Almost the entire family has been able to make it. Javy’s parents, his two sisters Danny and Jordan, with her husband and daughter in tow, and of course Grandma Machado.
They all went out to dinner the night before and arranged to meet up at the park where the ceremony is happening.
When the ceremony is done and Jake has his shiny new medal pinned to his uniform, Grandma Machado presses her phone into Javy’s hand and forces him to take about 50 photos of them together until she is satisfied.
“Alright, these will do”, she declares after inspecting the latest few “and don’t think I can’t see you role your eyes Javier. Make yourself useful and help me sent some photos to my book club, I doubt any of their grandchildren have been awarded medals.”
“Yes Grammy”, Javy complies, knowing better than to argue with the older woman.
“Now Jacob, introduce me to your teammates. I would like to meet the people who you work with”, she orders next, looping her arm through his.
“Yes ma’am.”
He starts with Payback and Fanboy, who are standing with their families nearby and afterwards make their way round to Phoenix.
Phoenix doesn’t outwardly react to Jake introducing Miriam Machado as his Grandmother but she has always had a great Poker face. She is however delighted when the woman tells her that her Callsign is the only she likes so far, including both “Hangman” and “Coyote”.
Rooster is hovering a few feet away, having heard the introduction, clearly confused but afraid to ask. Jake takes pity on him and waves him over.
“Rooster, this is my Grandma Miriam Machado, Grammy this is Bradley.”
She clearly recognizes the name from her calls with Jake and gives the man a scrutinising once-over.
“It’s nice to meet you ma’am”, Rooster says, oddly nervous, for reasons he isn’t going to look at too closely right now.
“Young man, that moustache makes you look like a criminal.”
Jake bursts into laughter at Bradley’s face after that statement. Rooster knows he is staring, quite obviously, at the sight but he can’t help it. A happy Jake is still a mesmerizing sight.
Fondly, without looking away from Jake, he manages to reply, “I can see where Jake get’s his opinion on the subject.” When he looks back to the older woman, she is giving him such a knowing look, that he feels himself blushing.
“Good to know I am raising my boy right. Now Bradley, why don’t you join us for a talk with your captain, I want to see for myself if he is good enough to teach my boys.”
The thought of getting to see Mav exposed to that scrutiny has Rooster smiling and he quickly shoots Jake a look, to make sure the other man doesn’t mind him joining before he replies. The Blond seems to think in a similar vein, going by the widening smirk on his face.
“I would love that.”
…
The first day after the weekend, when most of the dagger’s family members have left again, they meet up at the hard deck.
Later in the evening, when the group slowly starts to disperse, Rooster takes his chance to catch up with Jake. He gets two beers and hops on a stool next to him, from where he’s watching Javy play darts.
“Your grandma is one terrifying lady.”
Jake snorts and takes the offered drink, “yeah, she’s a feisty one.”
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but you didn’t grow up with a big family on a farm, did you?” Bradley carefully prods.
Jake finds it surprisingly easy to answer truthfully, “Nah, I grew up in a shitty flat in downtown Austin. With my dad, when he was there anyways.”
“You never talked about it.” Bradley makes sure to keep his tone light, not wanting to sound accusatory.
Jake shrugs, fiddling with the label on his beer as an excuse to avoid eye contact. “Just was easier this way. Everyone was always so charmed with the idea of me being some sort of Texas farm boy, I never disagreed. Not like there was anything else worth talking about.” He pauses. “It wasn’t terrible. Just… lonely.”
Rooster is glad Jake hadn’t brushed him of and is being honest instead. He half expected to be hit with a ‘you never asked’ – which wouldn’t have been undeserved.
“So how did you meet Grandma Machados?”
Jake brightens and smiles. Happy to talk about his real family - in any way that matters at least.
“The first time Javy took me home to meet his family, I was terrified. But as soon as I was through the door, Grammy Machado started bossing me around, telling me to put up decorations and stuff, since I was the tallest one in the room. I felt less like a pity project and more like I was useful being there, that helped a lot.” Jokingly he adds, “she was apparently satisfied with my work because I was allowed to stick around after that.”
“What about you? How are things with Mav?”
Since Jake let his guard down with him, Bradley makes an effort to return the honesty, “Good. Weirdly awkward sometimes but were both trying.”
“I am happy for you.” Jake says sincerely and gives Rooster another genuine smile.
As always, that smile pauses Roosters brain for a moment, and he can’t help but blurt out “Would you like to go on a date with me?”
Jake seems to be taken aback by the sudden question, and nervously Rooster goes on, “I still care about you, a lot, and I want to give us another chance. I promise I’ll do better this time, you know, actually communicate and stuff.”
“It wasn’t just you who was not communicating”, Jake acknowledges “but I’d like that. To try again – really this time.”
Bradley doesn’t even try to hide the pleased grin taking over his face and before he can overthink it, he turns a bit on the bar stool, so his knee ends up pressed against Jake’s and he takes the Blondes hand in his own.
They spend the rest of the night sitting there and talking, smiling at each other like idiots. Happy.