Work Text:
‘Qanika’ is what the Inuit people call the prototypical shape of spring snow, and it is all that matters to her. ‘Qannik’ is what they call her, and it means ‘snowflake’. ‘Quai’ is what the father of her child calls her, and it reminds her that he does not believe what she tells him yet. Minsu is a man of empiricism – he has to see things with his eyes, feel them in his bones, he goes by previous experience and that is why he still trusts Wilford. Qannik believes that mind defines any experience, and to really see things as they are, you only have to be brave enough to let them in. People in the Tail Section will not see the spring for the lack of windows. People in the Front Section will not see the spring for the lack of eyes. People of the Middle Section will, but they will be crashed by both of their neighbors.
Qannik cannot let that happen, because her daughter is her arms. Because the first sound she hears after Yona is born is rattling. That is these men’s experience. That is what they know – how to build trains and lock each other in parts of it. That is what Qannik cannot allow to become Yona’s experience. They will all go insane on this goddamn train, relying on nothing but survival instinct that is already turning them into animals.
But Minsu, the man she loves, the father of her child, the man for whom she was willing to go into this hell, calls her crazy. He calls her crazy and he hides his eyes, when Wilford’s soldiers take her to the Prison Section. He sneaks in there sometimes, only to tell her they have to wait. That she is out of her mind, if she lets Yona freeze to death owing to her people’s beliefs. He tells her that, when the people who are sane by his logic have just put her in a metal coffin. He tells her that, when the exact same people have done everything to separate them.
She would be scared if this madness has left any fear in her. Wilford and his brainwashed scum can find a million clever words, but these lies can’t fool Qannik, just like this train cannot fool snowflakes falling outside – they will find a way to change and prove those ignorant beings wrong.
If they step outside, it can all go away.
If they stay in the train, they will have to devour each other like beasts.
If they can survive, they will be free and human. If they cannot be free and human, there is no need to survive.
If she freezes to death now, then Minsu and Yona will be seeing her each year from the window.
They will see the Qanika arriving, when the ice will get thinner on her skin.