Chapter Text
Ichiro started a group chat with Jiro and Saburo.
Ichiro: Now that I bought us all phones I figure we’d better have one of these
Saburo: Awesome idea, Ichi-nii!
Jiro: Thx for everything niichan!
Saburo: I’ve wanted a smartphone for a long time, so I really appreciate this.
Jiro: Yea this is sick as hell I can finaly add my friends from school on snap and stuff
Ichiro: You’re welcome I’m happy you like them
Ichiro: But cell phones and data plans for each of us ain’t cheap
Ichiro: You guys had better use these responsibly got it?
Jiro: For sure!!
Saburo: I absolutely will.
Saburo: But that might be a tall order to fill for some of us, Ichi-nii…
Saburo: Who knows what dastardly, nefarious activities young Jiro might get up to on the Internet?
Saburo: He might need parental control locks to keep him safe.
Jiro: Wtf
Jiro: Your one to talk Saburo
Jiro: Your always on the computer doing shady shit
Saburo: Oh, please.
Saburo: I will not suffer texts from a fool who can’t even use the correct form of you’re.
Jiro: Oh yea?? I’ll make you suffer you little basturd!!!!!!
Saburo: Dumbass. Not even spellcheck can save you.
Jiro: TOUGH WORDS FOR A KID RIGHT DOWN THE HALL FROM ME
Saburo: Aww, has the belligerent gorilla discovered the caps lock?
Jiro: DONT CALL ME WIERD LONG WORDS YOU PRICK I WILL RING YOR NECK
Saburo: LOL. Maybe YOU should be the one in middle school, idiot.
Jiro: You pain in the ass you’re like a freakin toddler you shouldn't even be allowed to have a phone
Saburo: I don’t recall it being appropriate to hand smartphones to monkeys, either, and yet here we are.
Jiro: YOUR THE MONKEY YOU LITTLE FREAK
Saburo: Excuse me? I don’t understand monkey language.
Jiro: I WILL END YOU
Ichiro: Knock this off right now or I’m deleting this group chat
Saburo: Sorry.
Jiro: Sorry niichan
Saburo: I sent sorry first.
Jiro: Shutup
Saburo: Make me.
Ichiro: Guys
Ichiro: Don’t make me regret this
Ichiro: Now without being idiots tell me what you want for dinner
Saburo: Can we have beef curry?
Jiro: I was gonna say that
Ichiro: Got it I’ll stop by the grocery store on my way home
Ichiro: See you later bros
Saburo: Thank you, Ichi-nii!
Jiro: Thanks!!!!!!
Saburo: You don’t need that many exclamation marks.
Jiro: I do what I want
Saburo: Tell that to your zookeeper, monkey.
Ichiro: STOP
******
Jyuto Iruma started a group chat with Samatoki-san and Chief Rio Mason Busujima.
Jyuto: This is a group text chain. It will help us keep in touch and is useful in emergencies.
Samatoki-san: The fuck are you explaining it to me for? You think Im stupid?
Jyuto: The explanation was for Rio, Samatoki, not you. It’s his first time using a smartphone.
Chief Rio: This is Rio. That is correct. I have texted before but not on something like this. Over.
Samatoki-san: Damn
Samatoki-san: Well whatever it takes to keep me from having to go out into the bumfuck boonies just to tell you we’re going out for drinks or some shit
Jyuto: I thought the same. You can stay in your campsite, Rio, but now you have a better connection to the world at large.
Chief Rio: This is Rio. Thank you for your hard work setting this up for me, Jyuto. I am in your debt. Over.
Jyuto: Think nothing of it.
Samatoki-san: Rio you don’t have to type like you’re on a fucking walkie talkie
Samatoki-san: Enough of that over shit
Chief Rio: I understand your concern. However, I am trying to remain respectful to all persons sharing this channel. Over.
Samatoki-san: Jesus christ there’s only three of us
Samatoki-san: We’re not going to talk over one another because we’re texting
Samatoki-san: You just get the text when the motherfucker typing it sends it
Jyuto: Rio might not have as good of a connection out there as we do within the city.
Samatoki-san: Then he’ll just get the text when he gets it
Samatoki-san: It’s not that big a deal
Jyuto: Rio simply wants to be respectful to us, Samatoki.
Samatoki-san: He can be as respectful as he damn pleases but there’s no need to drag military lingo into it
Samatoki-san: So cut that shit out
Jyuto: What’s got you so worked up about this?
Samatoki-san: Look I guess I’m used to texts being to the point
Samatoki-san: Guys that text me either don’t have a lot of time or need to be discreet or are rightfully afraid of me
Samatoki-san: So they keep it short and sweet
Jyuto: I too do not have a lot of time and yet here I am humoring you.
Samatoki-san: Is that some kind of insult you dirty ass cop?
Jyuto: It’s not. By spending my precious time on this nonsense, I’d say it’s proof that I care about my team.
Jyuto: Rio is also trying to show that he cares in his own way.
Jyuto: I for one am happy to have the opportunity to contact him freely now, and I will not look this gift horse in the mouth.
Samatoki-san: Alright alright get off the soapbox
Jyuto: One might say I need to get off my high horse?
Samatoki-san: What the fuck
Samatoki-san: Wait are you making goddamn horse jokes at me?
Jyuto: Now Samatoki, don’t be so hasty.
Jyuto: That is, hold your horses.
Samatoki-san: You goddamn piece of shit bunny cop I will fucking kill you it is on sight next time I see you
Chief Rio: Jyuto is correct. In terms of bars, I only have one out of the possible four. Therefore I will continue to use this style of communication for the benefit of us all. Over.
Samatoki-san: What
Jyuto: As I guessed, it seems there is a significant delay.
Chief Rio: This is Rio. Many texts have come in at once. Please hold your fire until I may catch up. I will check back in later. Over and out.
Samatoki-san: This is going to give me a goddamn headache
******
Ramuda 💕🍭 started a group chat with DICE and Gentaro Yumeno.
Ramuda: hello my posse! °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°
Ramuda: now that dice won his phone back (yay dice!) i remembered something i wanted to do for a long time~!
Ramuda: it’s this group chat!! ＼(￣▽￣)／ welcome!!!!
DICE: YESSSSSSSSSSS
Ramuda: hi dice! congrats on your recent win! (ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ
DICE: hell yeah! ofc a gambling genius like me wouldnt be without his phone for long!
DICE: next time ill win my wallet back too 😤
Gentaro: Since when do you carry a wallet?
DICE: wdym ive always had a wallet
Gentaro: Ah. Perhaps I do not know of it because ‘tis always empty.
DICE: NO TIS NOT
Ramuda: hahaha! dice said tis too!
DICE: that was a typo!!! i meant its not 😠😠
Gentaro: On a different note, I must be frank.
DICE: i thought u were gentaro
Gentaro: You astound me.
Ramuda: hahaha! his name IS gentaro! or so we’ve been told…!!! (↼_↼)
Gentaro: To the point: While I deeply appreciate the sentiment behind this group chat, Ramuda, I would be remiss if I did not admit that it is not in mine own best interest.
Gentaro: As an author, I am constantly bombarded with texts, calls, and emails from individuals in the publishing industry. I make it a point to be off my phone as often as I can be. I do not wish to add more notifications to my proverbial plate.
Ramuda: wahhhh noooo gentarooooo!!! ｡･ﾟﾟ*(>д<)*ﾟﾟ･｡
DICE: oh cmonnnnn don’t be a buzzkill
Ramuda: i don’t want my only texts to be from my ladies! i love them to bits, but i’m a guy too, you know! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ
DICE: you gotta stay in the gc gentaro! how else am i gonna send you my dankest memes??
Gentaro: Why wouldst I desire anything damp and moldy? Especially from you.
Ramuda: what is a meme! (°ロ°) !
DICE: HOOOOOLLLLLY SHITTTTT
DICE: RAMUDAAAA BY GOD DO I HAVE SOME LINKS TO SEND TO YOUUU
Ramuda: hehe~ ok!
Gentaro: My point exactly. This is bothersome white noise. You must excuse me.
Ramuda: wait wait wait!!
Ramuda: if you leave how are you going to know about all of our super duper secret and cool team meetings?? ┬┴┤･ω~)〜☆
Gentaro: I will stop by your shop on a regular basis, as per usual.
Ramuda: but isn’t it faster to read texts from dice and i?
DICE: group chats are fun man!!!! and ramudas right there useful too!
DICE: if we start annoying you then you can mute the chat for awhile
DICE: i wont take offense! promise!
Ramuda: yeah!!! as long as you check in every once in a while, i’ll be happy~~! (b ᵔ▽ᵔ)b
Gentaro: Very well. If I am to stay, then you two shall conduct yourselves in a courtly manner.
Ramuda: courtly? well i love courting cute ladies~!
DICE: wdym by courtly? like a basketball court?
Gentaro: 𝒪, 𝓂𝓎 𝐿𝑜𝓇𝒹 𝒟𝒾𝒸𝑒, 𝓈𝑜 𝑔𝑒𝓃𝓉𝓁𝓎 𝒷𝓇𝑒𝒹 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓃-𝓉𝑒𝓂𝓅𝑒𝓇𝑒𝒹, 𝓉𝒽𝑜𝓊 𝓂𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝓆𝓊𝒾𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑒 𝓈𝑒𝓃𝓈𝑒𝓁𝑒𝓈𝓈 𝓆𝓊𝑒𝓈𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔, 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝒾𝓈 𝓃𝑜𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝑜𝒻 𝓈𝓅𝑜𝓇𝓉 𝒷𝓊𝓉 𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝑜𝓌𝓃 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉𝑜𝓃, 𝓎𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒽𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓉𝓈. 𝒪! 𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝑔𝒶𝓂𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓈𝓉𝒶𝓇𝓈 𝒹𝑜𝓉𝒽 𝓅𝓁𝒶𝓎 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽 𝓊𝓈 𝒶𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝒾𝓇 𝓉𝓇𝒾𝒻𝓁𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝑜𝓎𝓈!
Ramuda: wowie! (o´▽`o)
DICE: wtf how did u change ur font like that
Gentaro: My uncle works for the company that makes these phones. Therefore, I have access to many secret features.
DICE: WOAH FR?? how come ive never heard of this guy???
DICE: hes gotta be some tech billionaire right? could he lend me some dough?????
Gentaro: I said he makes phones, dear Dice, not that he was a baker.
DICE: tf?
Gentaro: Neither my uncle nor I can provide you any dough.
Gentaro: All that I can provide you…
DICE: ??????
Ramuda: (ಠ_ಠ) ?
Gentaro: …is yet more of my eloquent lies.
Ramuda: oooh!! gentaro with the dramatic pause and everything~!! ヽ(°〇°)ﾉ
DICE: soooooooo that’s a no on the loan? 😞
Gentaro: No.
Ramuda: hehehe aww poor dice~
DICE: 😭😭😭😭
Gentaro: I have changed my mind. This group chat is worthwhile after all.
******
Jakurai Jinguji started a group chat with hifumin 💛🌹 and Doppo Kannonzaka.
Jakurai: Good evening. I hope you are well. Have you found an elastic hair tie in your home? I seem to have misplaced it. I must have forgotten it the last time you had me over for dinner. Thank you for the meal, by the way. I apologize for this inconvenience.
Jakurai: Oh, what have I done here?
Doppo: Good evening Doctor. Were you trying to text both Hifumi and I at the same time?
Doppo: Doing that creates a group chat with everyone in the “To:” line, including yourself.
Jakurai: That wasn’t my intention. I must apologize again.
Doppo: No it’s completely fine!
Doppo: In fact it’s a good way to get in touch with both of us at once.
Doppo: If it’s OK with you, we should probably keep it.
Jakurai: That’s fine. It does sound useful. There will surely be many times I will wish to say the same thing to both of you, as I’ve already done.
Doppo: Right. I haven’t seen a hair tie, but I also haven’t been home all day, so…
Jakurai: You’re still working, Doppo-kun?
Doppo: Yes…I really shouldn’t be on my phone at all…but I’m waiting for a call and have nothing else to do…
Jakurai: If it is a call from a client that you’re waiting for, why can’t you do so in the comfort of your own home?
Doppo: Because they’re going to be calling my work number, which is a corded phone attached to my desk…so I can’t leave until they call
Jakurai: That sounds like quite the inconvenience to you. But, it is important to remain on good terms with your clients. I shall text message with you to pass the time until you are finished with your work.
Doppo: Oh Doctor that’s really not necessary!
Jakurai: It would be my pleasure. I am on call myself, with nothing to do unless the hospital requests my presence. I would enjoy passing the time by making conversation with you.
Doppo: That’s very kind Doctor. Thank you.
Jakurai: Again, it’s my pleasure. How has your day been?
Doppo: Business as usual…nothing major happened…
Jakurai: A peaceful day can be nice.
Doppo: Can it? I feel like it’s an omen…
Jakurai: An omen?
Doppo: If nothing bad happens all day long, that just means it’s all saving up for one giant horrible mess that will drop on me and crush me to death…
Jakurai: Doppo-kun, that point of view is too pessimistic. While there will always be mistakes and problems in life that we must deal with, it’s important to recognize the triumphs and joys in equal measure.
Doppo: You’re right…I’m sorry…
Jakurai: That’s alright. What is a nice thing that happened to you today?
…
Jakurai: Doppo-kun? Did you receive your call?
Doppo: No Doctor, I’m sorry. I’m still struggling to think of something good from today.
Jakurai: Still? Ten minutes have passed.
Doppo: I know. I’m sorry
Jakurai: That’s alright, Doppo-kun. I shall share something nice from my day and perhaps you can use it as inspiration. This morning, I had a particularly delicious cup of coffee. I’m not sure what made it different from the norm, but it was refreshing.
Doppo: I could use some coffee…
Doppo: Well…my lunch today was delicious. Hifumi packed a bento with potato salad as one of the sides.
Jakurai: That sounds wonderful. Hifumi-kun’s potato salad is superb.
Jakurai: That reminds me. Hifumi-kun, did you receive my initial text message?
Doppo: Oh he doesn’t text when he’s at work, Doctor. I mean when he’s wearing his suit.
Doppo: It’s against the rules of his host club for him to have a media presence besides what they approve
Doppo: So his “host mode” tends to forget about his phone…
Jakurai: I see. I suppose it is in the best interest of their company image to have such a rule in place.
Doppo: Yeah, but it can be really frustrating sometimes…
Doppo: There are times when I really need to contact him, but he won’t pick up the phone…
Doppo: I guess it’s my fault for distracting him while he’s at work, though…after all, his job is to focus on his clients…
Doppo: Imagine if those women had the time they paid for interrupted by someone as worthless as me…
Jakurai: Doppo-kun, please stop this.
Doppo: Sorry, Doctor.
Doppo: It’s so easy to string those thoughts together when I’m typing. It’s my stream of consciousness.
hifumin: Hallo halloooOOooO! Did somebody request the hifumeister?!?! 😙✨🌹🧸🎉💛
Doppo: Oh hi. What are you doing texting at work?
hifumin: I’m on a breaaak~~~
hifumin: It’s soooo hot tonight (wink!) so I took off my suit! I’m in the back drinking water and saw SOOOOOO many notifs from y’all! 🌟📳
Jakurai: Good evening, Hifumi-kun. How is work?
hifumin: It’s fiiiiiiiine~~ The night is still young tho so I have a loooooong while to go 🥱💨
Jakurai: I understand. I am on call until six o’clock in the morning, so I cannot rest until then.
hifumin: Wow Doc!!!!!!!!! It’s like we’re on the same shift!!!!!!! 🤩🌙👯♂️
Jakurai: That’s a funny thought. I do not wish to take time away from your break, though. Please ignore my text messages until it is more convenient for you to answer them.
hifumin: Whaaaa⁉️⁉️⁉️ No way!!! I usually text Doppochin when I’m on break anywhosits, even when I know he’s asleep~~
hifumin: But you’ll actually reply to me Doc! That’s super duper stellar! 🌟💫⭐️✨
Jakurai: Very well. I was just now in conversation with Doppo-kun while he waits for a call from a client.
hifumin: Mweeehhhh how boring~ 😪🛌💤
Jakurai: I must admit, I agree. I feel as though the polite thing to do, as a client, would be to wait until business hours to contact him. However, though I am proficient in using the equipment he sells, I am not at all knowledgeable in the details of Doppo-kun’s job. Therefore, perhaps I am grossly off the mark.
hifumin: Nahhhh I think it’s rude as HECKIE to make Doppochin wait aroundddd
Jakurai: Indeed.
Jakurai: He has not sent a text message in a few minutes. I wonder if they finally gave him the call.
Doppo: I SW AE A R TO FU CKIGNG GO D DHKJDHEWKHHWLK
Jakurai: Oh my.
Doppo: THEY RH WANT ED TTO CONFIRM AN APPOTINTMENT TIME EOHFM M YF UCCKKKKKK
hifumin: Whaaaaaaaaaaa~~~?
Doppo: IT TTOOK TWO MINUETES THIS CUDLVE BEEN A FUCKING EMAIL ARAAAAHAHAHFDFKJSDFHSFSDF I HAT E M Y LIFIFIFEEEEEE
hifumin: Yayyy, so the call’s all done~!! 🎉🎉 Go home now, Doppochin! 💛
Jakurai: Yes, please be safe on your way home.
Doppo: ASJKHDAHAKHD;;;’;WUEIFHSKDHSJH AAARERRAAHHHHHGHAJDSAJHDAAKH
Doppo: I’m sorry. Thank you very much. Have a good evening.
******
kuko harai started a group chat with Xx14th_MoonxX and Hitoya Amaguni (Personal).
kuko: aight heres the gc
kuko: we’re gonna use this to keep tabs on each other got it?
kuko: its a good way for all of us to stay on the level
kuko: you leave or delete it or spam this shit and ill kick yr ass
Hitoya: No complaints here.
Hitoya: Except one. The hell is up with your name, Jyushi?
Xx14th_MoonxX: 𝔉𝔬𝔬𝔩𝔦𝔰𝔥 𝔪𝔬𝔯𝔱𝔞𝔩𝔰... 𝔚𝔦𝔱𝔥 𝔰𝔲𝔠𝔥 𝔭𝔞𝔩𝔱𝔯𝔶 𝔠𝔯𝔞𝔫𝔦𝔞𝔩 𝔠𝔞𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔦𝔱𝔶, 𝔱𝔥𝔬𝔲 𝔞𝔯𝔱 𝔲𝔫𝔞𝔟𝔩𝔢 𝔱𝔬 𝔠𝔬𝔪𝔭𝔯𝔢𝔥𝔢𝔫𝔡 𝔪𝔶 𝔦𝔩𝔩𝔲𝔰𝔱𝔯𝔦𝔬𝔲𝔰 𝔳𝔢𝔯𝔟𝔦𝔞𝔤𝔢. 𝔒𝔫 𝔪𝔬𝔬𝔫𝔟𝔢𝔞𝔪'𝔰 𝔟𝔞𝔠𝔨 𝔡𝔬𝔱𝔥 𝔪𝔶 𝔠𝔥𝔞𝔯𝔦𝔬𝔱 𝔯𝔦𝔡𝔢, 𝔭𝔲𝔩𝔩𝔢𝔡 𝔟𝔶 𝔰𝔦𝔵 𝔰𝔦𝔩𝔳𝔢𝔯-𝔣𝔢𝔞𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯𝔢𝔡, 𝔰𝔦𝔵-𝔴𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔢𝔡, 𝔰𝔦𝔵-𝔢𝔶𝔢𝔡 𝔠𝔯𝔬𝔴𝔰! ℌ𝔞𝔯𝔨! 𝔗𝔥𝔢𝔶 𝔡𝔬𝔱𝔥 𝔞𝔫𝔫𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔠𝔢 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔭𝔯𝔢𝔰𝔢𝔫𝔠𝔢 𝔬𝔣 ℌ𝔦𝔰 𝔇𝔞𝔯𝔨 𝔈𝔪𝔦𝔫𝔢𝔫𝔠𝔢, 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔇𝔢𝔳𝔦𝔩 𝔓𝔯𝔦𝔫𝔠𝔢 𝔣𝔯𝔬𝔪 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔙𝔬𝔦𝔡 ℑ𝔱𝔰𝔢𝔩𝔣! 𝔗'𝔦𝔰 ℑ, 𝔉𝔬𝔲𝔯𝔱𝔢𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔥 𝔐𝔬𝔬𝔫!
kuko: not this shit again
Hitoya: Kid, I can’t read this. It shows up as squares on my phone. You know this.
kuko: jyushi brother you HAVE to use normal fuckin text
Xx14th_MoonxX: sowwy (´• ω •`)
kuko: absolutely the fuck not
Hitoya: Was that a typo?
kuko: i wish it fuckin was
Xx14th_MoonxX: i was just trying to say sorry…
kuko: yea yea yr forgiven
Xx14th_MoonxX: i’m not rly used to texting anybody except my online friends! plz be patient with me! (⌒_⌒;)
Hitoya: I still don’t get it.
Xx14th_MoonxX: hm? whats the matter? (•ิ_•ิ)?
Hitoya: That. What’s that mess of random characters?
Xx14th_MoonxX: oh!!! its called a kaomoji hitoya! from the word for face!
Xx14th_MoonxX: the characters combine to make the image of a cute lil guy!! and there’s lots of different expressions to use!!!!
Xx14th_MoonxX: this guy is angry: (＃`Д´)
Xx14th_MoonxX: and this one is blowing you a kiss!! ( ´ ∀ `)ノ～ ♡
Hitoya: I see. Cute.
Xx14th_MoonxX: right?? 。.:☆*:･'(*⌒―⌒*)))
kuko: so yr internet pals put up with u texting them like that?
Xx14th_MoonxX: put up with…?
Xx14th_MoonxX: umm we all text like this (・・;)ゞ
kuko: how do you get to the goddamn point of anything??
Xx14th_MoonxX: huh?
kuko: you spend all that time lookin thru the fuckin emoji keyboard for the shit u want right
kuko: sounds like a goddamn waste of time
Hitoya: It does seem kind of superfluous.
kuko: uhhhh yeah that word
kuko: that too
Hitoya: If you’re texting effectively, you shouldn’t need a kaomoji to show how you feel. That should be clear in your words.
kuko: as they say “a man should be as forthright in his words and actions as a blacksmith precisely strikes his steel”
Hitoya: I’ve never heard anyone say that.
Xx14th_MoonxX: stop it!!!!!!!!!!
Xx14th_MoonxX: it’s not superfluous!!!!!!!! it’s cute and fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! stop stop!!!!!
Xx14th_MoonxX: (ﾉಥ益ಥ)ﾉ
kuko: aight jesus
kuko: look homeslice if it brings you that much fuckin joy then i’ll quit being such an ass about it
kuko: im sorry
Hitoya: I am too. Don’t get upset.
kuko: we all express ourselves in our own ways
kuko: and that shit is valid
kuko: except that goddamn cursive horseshit
kuko: dont ever do that again
Hitoya: Seconded.
Xx14th_MoonxX: i wont! not with you guys 🖤
Xx14th_MoonxX: changed their name to Jyushi Aimono🖤.
Jyushi: i’m so excited to be in a groupchat with you!!!!
Jyushi: ヽ(☆▽☆)ﾉ
kuko: heard
kuko: every good family needs one
Hitoya: There are two things I like most. Firstly, a well-kept classic Gibson guitar. Secondly, efficiency.
Hitoya: This seems like it will be the most efficient way for Bad Ass Temple to communicate.
kuko: i already said that shit when i started the damn chat
kuko: pay attention to my messages you shitty ass corrupt ass lawyer
Hitoya: I never thought I’d say this, but you need to learn new curse words. There are only so many ways you can call me an ass before it starts to lose its bite, you foulmouthed excuse of a monk.
kuko: hahhhh????
kuko: you wanna see me REALLY cursing???
Jyushi: plssss i must ask u to stop again!! ..・ヾ(。＞＜)シ
Hitoya: Both of you need to learn proper syntax and grammar.
kuko: ill shove yr fuckin syntax up yr asshole you slimy bitch
kuko: dont listen to him jyushi you text fine
Hitoya: Switching sides, are we?
kuko: wtf are yu talkin about shithat
kuko: im alredy used to it and those damn kao things are kinda cute
Jyushi: (ノ*°▽°*)
kuko: so youd better get on board or be lost to the endless blue of isolation as they say
Hitoya: I get the ship reference, but again, no one says that.
kuko: i say that
kuko: so there
kuko: bitch
Jyushi: (＠_＠)
******
Sassyra NuRUDE started a group chat with Rosho Tsutsujimori and 06-XXXX-XXXX.
Sassyra: OK! Here’s a bunch of French kitties – we’ve got a group chat! 😽🐈🐈🐈
Rosho: God.
Rosho: Can we not start on this foot?
Sassyra: If you’d rather start with a hand Rosho I’d be happy to give it to you! 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Rosho: This is hell.
Sassyra: Hey hey why is Rei’s number not showing up with his name?
06-XXXX-XXXX: You kidding me? Of course this is a burner phone
Sassyra: Whoa!
Rosho: That’s shady.
06-XXXX-XXXX: Lol I’m kidding. I haven’t put my name in that’s all
Sassyra: Whoa part two! The old man even knows lol!
06-XXXX-XXXX: Heyyyy watch yourself. I’m 40 something not 100 something
Rosho: Lol? I don’t get it.
Rosho: Lots of love?
Sassyra: Damn this is a whoa-ller coaster!
Sassyra: Rosho you’ve been my friend this whole time and you don’t know what lol means????
Rosho: Should I?
Sassyra: Yessssssssss 🐍
Sassyra: It means laughing out loud!
06-XXXX-XXXX changed their name to Rei Amayado.
Sassyra: Nice!!
Rosho: That explains why you don’t use it, then.
Sassyra: Oh? Whaddyamean?
Rosho: When you write laughter via text, you type out “haha” over and over.
Rosho: Which is kind of annoying, honestly.
Sassyra: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU MEANIE
Rosho: Q.E.D.
Rei: Sasara what is this for?
Sassyra: Whaddyamean II: The Sequel?
Rei: The group text. You got something you need to say to us?
Sassyra: Oh no not particularly! I just thought a group for all 3 of us to msg in would be REELy beneFISHal! 🎣🐟🐠🐡
Rosho: I’m blocking you.
Sassyra: Noooooooo Rosho please! I promise I won’t make any more puns
Rosho: I don’t believe you.
Sassyra: Scout’s honor!
Rosho: You were never a scout.
Sassyra: How do you know? Hmm?
Sassyra: You don’t even know how many patches I got
Sassyra: I’m rocking a full sash
Rosho: Okay! Fine. Cut it out.
Sassyra: Hooray!!!!
Sassyra: Thank you so much Rosho!
Sassyra: You’re a PUNderful guy!
Rosho Tsutsujimori left the group chat.
Sassyra: NOOOOOOOOOOO
Rei: Reap what you sow
Sassyra NuRUDE added Rosho Tsutsujimori to the group chat.
Rosho: Do NOT drag me back here against my will.
Rosho Tsutsujimori left the group chat.
Sassyra: But Roshooooo we need youuuuu it’s not DotsuHon without you!!!
Sassyra: Aaaaaahhhhh he’s gone again 😣
Rei: Looks like you’d be better off just texting us individually
Sassyra: I was hoping a group for all of us would be good for team bonding
Rei: I was under the assumption you two were close pals
Sassyra: Well
Sassyra: We WERE
Sassyra: But now he’s blocked me 😓
Rei: Well isn’t that a twist
Rei: Maybe I’ll go have a talk with him
Sassyra: Oh no!
Sassyra: I was jk
Sassyra: This happens sometimes
Rei: Does it?
Sassyra: Yeahhhh it’s this funny bit that we do!
Sassyra: Give it five minutes and he’ll come craaaawling back to me mwahaha
Sassyra: Then I can re add him!!
Rei: Alrighty then
…
Rei: So what was that about five minutes?
Sassyra: 😑😑😑😑
Sassyra: Ok believe me this is super out of the ordinary
Sassyra: It doesn’t usually take HOURS for him to get back to me
Rei: You know Sasara maybe this time was the last straw
Sassyra: No way!! The only straws I have are bendy ones! 🥤
Rei: You sure do like using those emojicons huh
Sassyra: Hahahahahahaha emojicons
Sassyra: You really ARE an old man!
Rei: Rosho was right
Rei: Where’s the block button
Sassyra: WAIT WAIT WAIT
Sassyra: You can’t abandon me too!
Sassyra: Then it’ll just be me…
Sassyra: All alone…
Sassyra: I’ll be…
Sassyra: Sad-sara Boo-hoo-de…
Sassyra: Rei? Are my texts sending?
Rei: I see them. I just wasn’t going to let you have that one
Sassyra: HOLD ON ROSHO IS TEXTING ME
Rei: 🎉
Sassyra NuRUDE added Rosho Tsutsujimori to the group chat.
Rosho: Good afternoon everyone.
Sassyra: Good afternoon my booty!!! What is the meaning of this, young man!!!
Rei: I have to admit I’m curious too
Rosho: I did not intend to ignore you all day! I was going to unblock you and put my phone away before I started class.
Sassyra: SEE REI I TOLD YOU
Rei: Yeah you told me
Rosho: However, my phone experienced
Rosho: Sorry I hit send too soon
Rosho: However, my phone experienced an unfortunate accident.
Rei: Your phone did?
Sassyra: What happened????
Rosho: One question mark is acceptable.
Sassyra: No, it’s questionable!
Rei: Lol what kind of accident?
Rosho: My class was weirdly quiet this morning and I got anxious with all those eyes on me. So I dropped my phone in my cup of coffee.
Sassyra: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Rei: How do you manage that?
Rosho: My hands were shaking! It was serious! Leave me alone!
Sassyra: Oh my goddddddd
Sassyra: So let me guess
Sassyra: Did your phone sit in rice all day?
Rosho: I didn’t have any, idiot. I was at school.
Rosho: I put it by the window.
Sassyra: SO IT COULD DRY FROM THE HEAT OF THE SUN?
Rei: A smartphone overheats when you leave it out like that
Rosho: That is correct.
Sassyra: ……Did your phone overheat?
Rosho: That is correct.
Sassyra: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Rosho: CUT IT OUT
Rei: You’re texting us again now though
Rei: So is everything OK at the end of the day?
Rosho: Thank you for asking, Rei.
Rosho: I have some techie students in my afternoon block and they were able to help me out.
Sassyra: I’m so glad your phone works again Rosho! 😊
Rosho: Excuse me? Don’t go flipping the script on me now.
Rosho: You were LOL-ing at me a minute ago.
Sassyra: 😮😮😮😮😮😮😮
Sassyra: Yayyyy Rosho! You’re learning how to text!
Rosho: I know how to text dumbass! I’m more literate than you!
Sassyra: At least I take care of my phone, unlike SOME people, I’m not naming names (Rosho)
Rosho: I TAKE CARE OF MY PHONE
Rei: You guys are a riot
Sassyra: Riot? No no, Rei, he had to DRY IT!
Sassyra: 😝
Rosho Tsutsujimori left the group chat.
Rei Amayado left the group chat.
Sassyra: GUYYYYSSSSS