Chapter Text
Emotions are an ever changing aspect of human life. Different variables that influence a person's feelings, also result in changes of a person's perception of others
People who were strangers at the beginning of the year could easily find someone's family that could never be replaced. Someone who used to be your worst nightmare could easily be your closest brother, and sometimes… You may start to feel even more…
Growing up, Alban Knox never knew what it felt like to have an actual family. He was too busy trying to survive, to think about why his parents would leave him alone. His earliest memories were filled with coldness and darkest of nights. When he met Victor, the man took him under his wing. He felt warmth for the very first time. It wasn't at all better, but Alban thought he wouldn't be alone anymore.
Until Victor was taken away from him. He remembered staying beside his body, feeling the last of his warmth fade away… And he was left to deal with cold nights on his own, again.
He survived for a few years, perfecting his craft. He never got close to anyone again… The pain of losing someone was too much, and he couldn't go through that again.
When he somehow got transported through a wormhole and became a part of Noctyx, he was confused as hell for a while (to be fair, the rest of the group were probably in the same condition). He initially thought that he would only be working with the guys, he hadn't the heart to be close to them (after all, one of them was literally a cop – his worst enemy—).
Contrary to his expectations, they all easily became close, even Alban and Uki (probably the one with the most cruel past, along with Alban) found themselves finding warmth within the group.
Alban never thought he would become close with Sonny either (he remembered how much he avoided the blond like a plague), since the man was a cop. Someone he never had any good relationship with. But for someone that was used to having authority, Sonny have always been gentle with Alban, always caring. The first week of them being on speaking terms he had already declared "Alban is my special younger brother" right as they were having dinner with the guys.
His declaration that night made him blush up to his ears, feeling happy for the first time in a long while.
Of course, he never expected his fondness of Sonny to develop into something more.
Yes, despite Alban's self-inhibitions, he found himself falling for his 'brother'.
It was stupid, he knew, Sonny had been very vocal about them being long lost brothers, he knew that he would always be just that.
The little brother.
For the longest time, Alban told himself it was okay. He allowed himself to play the role of the cute younger brother.
Only the cute younger brother…
He thought he was going to be okay with that. As long he stayed close enough to joke around and experience Sonny's warmth and caring personality.
But he knew the more selfish part of him wants to be more than just a brother.
"Alban~." Sonny's sudden low voice in his ear was playful, and effective in breaking Alban from his fantasies.
He found the blond's face inches away, looking at him directly.
"S-Sonny!" He yelped, voice rising a couple of pitches that would have made Yugo proud. "W-What the hell, O-Onii, you startled me!" He wasn't even kidding. His heart felt ready to jump out of his ribcage at their proximity.
Sonny simply chuckled. "You were so lost in your thoughts I couldn't help it," he teased.
Alban huffed, feeling his face warm a little. "You're just being mean~," he glared at him.
Doesn't his man know how dangerously handsome he is?
The grin on the man's face just served to make his heart flutter even more. As Sonny reached out to ruffle his hair affectionately. "Yeah, you're right. I'm just messing with my cute precious little bro~," he cooed.
"I hate you~." Well, no, not really… It's actually quite the opposite—.
"Aww, don't, please, okay?" Damn it. Sonny pulls off his pouting face and Alban simply melts away.
Oh, he is so fucked.
"Fine~!" He never could get mad at Sonny anyway.
A pinch to his cheeks sent Alban's face even redder. "You're the best, otouto!!" The VSF commander declared, before he bolted out the door, leaving Alban to his thoughts once more. "What the heck did he even come into my room for? Just to mess with me?" He shook his head.
He remembers Sonny having a long stream today, so he should be tired and need to be resting instead of messing with him like that.
Or maybe… Nah, that can't be the case.
But his heart beat faster at the thought of Sonny wanting to spend time with him before resting.
Once upon a time, Alban thought about confessing his feelings to Sonny. It had been a year or so that Noctyx had been together, and they were as close as ever.
Heck, even their fans think something was up between them. Although neither of them really said anything to address the speculation. Their managers said to play into the 'fan service', as they called it.
Sonny simply chuckled and said he found it cute, even suggesting their 'ship name' as 'SonnyBan'. Alban laughed with him and agreed with the ship name, feeling himself falling further for the man.
But Alban, being the scaredy cat he was, always stepped back whenever he thought about coming clean to Sonny.
He was afraid that the man would change if he knew how Alban really felt about him. That he would start to avoid Alban.
That thought terrified him more than anything else.
But… He also didn't want to live his life behind a lie.
And so, Alban decided he'll definitely confess to Sonny… Once he gets the chance.
Another thing he didn't expect was that he'd probably never have that chance.
Alban was in his room that day, planning what he should stream next. There were a lot of games on sale on steam, but he wasn't sure what would be good to play for his Takaradachis.
He was actually thinking about asking Sonny, since he was the one streaming everyday (Alban was still on his pseudo break), what would be good when Sonny came into his room.
"Hey Sonny~," he greeted. It has been a while since they called each other ‘Onii~ and Otouto’ now, despite still being close. Alban thought maybe he was starting to look into something else in the blond's eyes, "What's up?"
Sonny looked a little fidgety. Like he had something on his mind that he couldn't quite say out loud. "Well, I…"
"Aww, what's wrong? Everything okay?"
Sonny didn't really speak after a while, and Alban patiently waited for him to open up. The man sighed and sat down next to him. "Alban, you're my closest friend, my brother, right?" He began seriously
"Huh? Of course I am!" Alban wasn't sure why he was saying so, but he nodded, waiting for him to continue
"Well, I haven't told anyone about this, but I wanted to be honest to you, since you're my baby brother and all…" he sounded hesitant, and Alban felt a little worried about what he wanted to say.
"You can tell me anything Sonny. Anything at all," what is he saying?
It was a full minute before Sonny decided to break his silence.
"Alban… I… I think I might be in love with Uki."