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El could barely stand, her pale hands gripping the sink and her eyelids felt heavy, she didn't even have the strength to see herself in the mirror. The dried trails on her cheeks got wet again as a unique tear fell, stopping at her chin. Her throat burned when she tried to stop the incoming sobs. She could hear the countless voices of her friends and family outside of the bathroom but didn't pay attention.
She forced her eyes open, her reflection full of bruises from what they hoped was the final battle. El exhaled, finally, she felt as if she had been holding her breath for years. They had finally stopped him, the Upside-Down was gone for good. She and Will had gone back together and had finished Vecna, One, Henry. She could finally breathe.
The sharp pain was still present in her chest, every time she breathed; the bruises of the electric machine that had restarted her heart were still red and itchy, the burns on her arms, the pain that covered her body as she tried to stand straighter. She just wanted to sleep, and sleep, and sleep a little bit more.
And yes, she knew she was strong, but she was still a person, and she had the right to be exhausted after saving the world for the fourth time in her very short life. She was only fourteen. She should have been dancing to music, going to the mall with Max, drawing, and anything but battling interdimensional beings that kept trying to destroy everything and everyone she loved.
She should have been braiding her pretty hair, she didn't even have it now. Her fingers reached the short strands, and she tried to smile at her reflection. She felt like the little kid in the Wheeler’s bathroom, lost and afraid after escaping the lab. The girl without a name.
She reached for the doorknob and stepped outside. The cabin was full of all her family and friends, everyone was chatting softly as they held each other. Her eyes wandered around, looking for Will.
“El?” Her brother's voice came from beside her, he looked exhausted. His arms wrapped around her waist after she threw her own around his neck, and she finally let herself cry. Sobbing loudly in his chest as he cradled her head carefully.
Will started to sob, and she tightened her grip. I never want to let you go, again. She said in her mind and knew he heard her when he hugged her even closer. Everyone was probably watching them. She didn't care.
“We are okay now” he breathed out, pulling away from her after a minute, she nodded. Trying to clean her face with her dirty sleeve, her flowery shirt ruined forever now, full of dirt, blood, and whatever else was in hell.
Joyce made her way toward them, enveloping both of them in a quick but tight hug, kissing their foreheads. El felt warm inside, content. Joyce had always known how to comfort her after the worst times, like when she looked for Will in the bath, or when she came home from school with teary eyes and destroyed books. She wonders if she har wanted a daughter as much as she always wanted a mother.
“You two should go to sleep now, your bed is still in your room, El.” She said when they pulled back, she couldn't do anything else than nod and drag Will to her old room. El glanced at the room again, Dustin and Eddie were sleeping on the old couch, and Hopper was holding Mike close to his chest, weird, El thought. Jonathan and Nancy were sitting on the floor by the door, tangled together. And the rest must be outside, resting in the dark of the night.
When they reached her room, Will threw himself on the old mattress, exhaling loudly, El curled next to him, looking up at the stars through the hole in the roof. She had always liked stars. She still didn't understand what they were or why they were in the sky, but they were nice to look at. She remembers that Jonathan took them to the desert to see the shooting stars one night, back in Lenora; it was beautiful and they filled her chest with a weird feeling. Which made her remember,
“My heart stopped”
“What?”
Well, maybe she shouldn't have said that without explaining first, because Will had tensed and was now sitting up, looking down at her with wide eyes and concern written all over his face.
“Before, when I was getting my memories back,” She started, resting a hand on his shoulder, hoping that would relax him and make him lay back again, which worked partially, as he was still concerned, frowning at her. “I got scared. There was blood everywhere, and-” She tried to stop a sob, “I thought I had done something bad to- to my siblings. But it wasn't me.” She let the tears roll down her cheeks, finally letting them out.
“And, I am okay now.”
She felt Will’s arms envelop her in a hug as she cried silently. She felt a tightness in her chest as she tried to breathe, the memories still clear every time she closed her eyes.
“It's okay El. I know, I know you didn't do it, we don't have to talk about it now, you are tired.”
Will hugged her close to his chest as El started to breathe evenly. She nodded, giving in to the tiredness of her body and mind.
Then, in the small and destroyed cabin in the woods of Hawkins, Indiana; El Hopper finally had her well-deserved sleep, after years of fighting she could finally stop, and she knew that there was a lot to fix and a lot to heal, but for now, she was safe, everyone was safe.