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“Vax’ildan!” His father whispered over the light orchestral music gliding through the great hall of the elven palace. “Stand up straighter and stop picking at the lace.”
The elven court was holding a dinner party for ambassadors and their families, so therefore their father had his hand forced to bring the twins. Normally he would never bring them to an event, but they were directly invited. So now they stood, side by side in opposite color frilled dresses, among high elven nobles.
“I wish I wasn’t wearing this in the first place,” Vax murmured to himself, continuing to pick at the lace collar suffocating his neck.
“What was that!” his father asked, his tone violent.
“Nothing, father,” Vex said, stepping in front of her brother.
“I wish I wasn’t wearing this stupid dress,” Vax said, disregarding Vex’s attempt to save him as she gripped his arm tightly.
Their father said nothing, instead grabbing Vax’s arm, digging his fingernail into his flesh as he pulled him towards the hallway. Vex, still holding Vax’s arm, followed them until their father turned and snapped.
“Know your place Vex’ahlia,” he growled, ripping her hand off of Vax’s arm. Vex was left in the ballroom alone, watching her brother trip over his own feet to keep up with their father.
***
Vax startles awake to footfalls below him. The branch he’s sleeping on is about 8 feet off the ground, with a perfect view of the grove below where all his friends are sleeping. Vex is in a tree to the right of him, peacefully sleeping in the moonlight. Vax looks down to see Keyleth walking below him.
Keyleth.
He needs to tell her, he knows that. It’s probably why he was dreaming of that night. He has never told any of their friends, except Pike, who saw him without his shirt while healing a wound. She saw the top surgery scars. Being Pike, she didn’t ask, but Vax told her anyway. She would not hurt him. He knows the others wouldn’t either, but he can’t help but be scared. It’s such a long kept secret he doesn’t know how to break it. And then there’s Keyleth.
He loves her. Her strong will, her willingness to face the things she fears for her friends, the way she always comes through. He loves every part of her. And it would break him if she hated him for this. Something he can’t change. A part of him that he hates and loves in the same breath. He knows Keyleth would not hurt him, but hiding is easier.
Vax wants her to know. Wants her to know every part of him and choose to love every part, like he does for her.
Below him Keyleth does circles around the party, keeping watch for anything meaning harm. Her red hair flows back and forth with her steps, her hair seems to glow under the moonlight and-
She’s staring right at him. Her bright green eyes look at him in shock for a moment, not expecting him to be awake. Then she waves at him and Vax feels his cheeks flush as he realizes how weird he is being. Watching her from a tree, being a total creep. Stupid.
Vax, distracted by his own embarrassment, doesn't notice Keyleth until she is right under him. He watches in awe as she sits down and lets vines form under her, pushing her up to his height.
“Can’t sleep?” she says quietly, settling on the branch next to him.
“Yeah, bad dream,” he says gruffly, tucking his knees up to chest.
“Do you want to talk about it-”
“No!” he says too quickly and Keyleth flinches back, a look of hurt crossing her face.
“Sorry, just not now. I will later, if you're willing” he says, reaching his hand out.
“Of course Vax,” she says, taking his hand and blushing at the physical contact. They sit there for a while, drinking in each other, hand in hand and looking at the stars.
***
The hallway was empty. Its giant golden arches and white walls loomed over Vax as his father halted and turned his menacing glare on Vax.
“Care to explain why you are choosing to disrespect me in public, of all places?” he asks,his voice dripping with spite.
He can do this. Maybe his father will listen this time.
“I want to wear pants like the other boys,” he says quietly, looking at the ground before his father’s feet.
His father leaned down, forcing Vax to look him in the eyes and see his anger filled expression.
“You are not a boy,” he said in a hushed tone, hate filling every word. “No matter how much I give you children, you never think it’s enough. That dress cost more than you are worth! You waste my time, then publicly attack me for having you dressed well. You and your sister are just leeches, and that’s all you’ll ever be. You barely even count as my daughter!”
Tears rolled down Vax’s cheeks as his father told him of his hatred.
“Get out of my sight!”
And Vax ran.
***
Vax wakes in the morning to find Keyleth gone, and the others packing away camp. They just finished a job in the area, and decided to rest until morning before portalling back to the keep. He jumps down from the tree and joins the others, helping pack everything and leave no trace. Every once and awhile he meets Keyleth’s eyes and then looks away quickly, guilt filling him. Finally with everything packed, Keyleth presses her hand to a tree and a swirling mass of green breaks forth. It still impresses him everytime she does it, the calm concentrated look on her face as she does her magic. It’s beautiful.
Once they are back at the keep after weeks of tracking through the wilderness, Vax waits for a couple of hours before seeking out his sister, taking a much needed bath in the meantime. He finds her in her room brushing Trinket, his armor spread out to be polished. Vax closes the door and Vex looks up with a questioning look on her face. He sighs, stepping forward and flopping onto the bed.
“Is something wrong? You're being awfully dramatic,” She asks, continuing to brush Trinket.
“I need to tell her,” he says, pressing his face into the covers.
“You’re going to have to be more specific dear.”
“Keyleth, about well the whole-” he waves vaguely at himself.
“Oh, I see,” she muses. “Well, you could just tell her.”
“You’re not being helpful,” he says, looking at her irritated.
“I know,” she laughs. “But be realistic. Keyleth is one of the most accepting people I’ve met, so you’ll be fine darling.”
“I know, it’s just hard,” he says, suddenly feeling like he might cry. Vex gently rubs her hand on his back, turning all her attention to him now.
“You’ll have to tell her eventually if you're going to… you know.” She shrugs off that last part, sex being the last thing she wants to talk to her brother about.
“Okay, that’s it. I’m leaving” he says, pushing himself off the bed and rushing out the door.
“Good luck darling!”
***
Vex found him in a tree, sitting on a high branch of an oak while staring aimlessly at the star filled night sky. She hiked up her skirts, etiquette be damned, and climbed.
“What’s wrong, sister?” Vex asked as she pulled herself onto a branch just below him. He flinched hearing her speak.
Sister.
Wrong. It all feels wrong. The dress seemed to choke him as his mind screamed at that word.
Sister.
Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong-
“Vax.” He felt his sister’s hand brush against his. He looked down at her. Her eyes widened as she saw his red rimmed eyes. “Did he hurt you?”
He nodded, showing his inner arm where bloody half-moon shaped cuts laid where his father held his arm.
“I’m going to kill him,” Vex said, reaching up to lightly touch his arm.
“I’m a boy.”
“What?”
Vax avoided eye contact with his sister, focusing his eyes on the stars.
“I’m not a girl, I'm a boy,” he repeated.
Vex moved, reaching up and putting herself onto the same branch as Vax. She faced him.
“Look at me,” she said softly. their hazel eyes met. “You are my brother and I will never forget that.”
Vax’s eyes widened.
Brother.
It feels right.
Vex pulled him into her arms as he started crying again with the moon and the stars as witness.
***
Vax finds himself at a door covered in ivy, trying to knock. He wasn’t sure about any of this, he had only come out to two people in his life, Vex and his father, the latter of which went very poorly. Vax’s life is full of going into dangerous unknowns and putting his life at risk, but this is harder. If Keyleth hates him he’ll have to go on living knowing that she hates him. That thought scares him more than any monster. But if he is to continue whatever this relationship is, he knows he has to do this. He can’t keep this from her, the guilt would kill him. He knows her, knows she wouldn’t hurt him, but it’s hard to expose such a hidden part of himself.
With his heart beating in his ears, he knocks on a space on the wooden door that isn’t covered in vines. A crash comes from inside, followed by quick footfalls before the door opens, revealing a slightly bruised Keyleth.
“Sorry I just-” She looks up as she opens the door and stops talking, seeing Vax standing in the doorframe.
“Vax,” she says, a blush spreading across her face.
“Is everything okay?” he asks.
“Yeah everythings fine, why would it not be?” she giggles, flustered.
“I heard a clash?”
“Oh well, plants kind of took over my room and it's hard to move around in there,” she says, her face growing increasingly red.
“Oh.”
A silence falls as they continue to look at eachother.
“So, can I come in?” Vax breaks the silence, feeling awkward about just standing in the hallway.
“Oh oh! Yeah, just be careful of the plants,” she says, opening the door wider to let Vax in.
Keyleth’s room is overgrown with plants. Her collection of house plants had turned into a sprawling mess of vines and flowers, to the point of there being very little floor space left. Every piece of furniture has some sort of vines crawling up the surface.
“Wow,” Vax says, scanning the room.
“Yeah, when I leave for too long they kind of grow out of control,” she says awkwardly.
Vax nods, still looking around the room at all of the different plants and flowers, in awe of all the chaos. He agilely makes his way over to windowsill, one of the very few places to sit, and sits down. He takes a deep breath, gathering his courage.
“I want to talk about last night,” he says quietly, part of him wishing she didn’t hear.
“Oh sure,” she says, sounding more serious, and walks toward him to sit on the windowsill. They sit there, not close enough to touch, but close enough that one move would bring skin to skin. Vax sighs, tilting his head up to look at the ceiling where a red flower looks down at them. He curls his hand open on his thigh, hoping that Keyleth will take it. She does, her gentle hand braces his, squeezing.
“Kiki,” he says lightly, looking into her concerned gaze. “I was born a girl.”
Vax braces himself, waiting for the punch.
“Oh okay,” she says. Confusion crosses her face first, then giving away to a smile.
“You’re not mad?”
“Why would I be?” Confusion crosses her face again.
“I hid this from you,” his voice cracks on ‘you’, emotion taking over his voice. He’s crying, he wishes he wasn’t. He wants to run, but Keyleth’s hand holds him in place.
“Vax,” she says quietly, bringing her other hand up to his face, wiping away his tears and gently cupping his face. “I like you for you, not who you used to be.”
Those words hung heavy over the two as Vax gripped her hand tighter.
“I thought you would hate me.”
“I could never,” she says quietly. She scoots her body closer, pressing their thighs together, a blush coming back into her cheeks, and pulls Vax into a hug.
They sit there together, reveling in each other's touch with the moon and stars as witness.