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Here’s the thing about Uchiha: they are not dead. Yes, no matter what you may think, they can still breathe...when they feel like it, of course. For Sasuke especially, it is a force of habit, one developed over a few hundred years. Another thing about Uchiha: they haven’t lived together for a long time. Sure, they met on birthdays and holidays and other special occasions, but the last time Sasuke stayed with a family member was when he was eighty-nine. He’d moved out before his ninetieth birthday, just like his brother, and his parents had separated soon after that. Every Uchiha could contact one another, and it was confirmed that Sasuke’s parents were the last ones to live within an hour of each other. One final thing about Uchiha: they don’t like the hand that they’ve been dealt by the universe. Really, who would? It’s said that they’re all loners who have forgotten too many things for them to be sane.
In case you are wondering, no, Uchiha are not vampires—or zombies or any other undead monstrosity for that matter. In actuality, no one is quite sure what the Uchiha are, much less the Uchiha themselves, but since the red-eyed immortals rarely ever make contact with the public and cause a minimal amount of trouble, everyone is quite happy to ignore them. Like this, the two groups (that is, the Uchiha and literally everyone else) stayed in something close to harmony. Until, of course, Sasuke Uchiha had enough.
Over the course of multiple letters with his older brother, Sasuke gradually revealed something. “I,” he had confessed in one of them, “am bored.” It was understandable. Sasuke was always hard to please and staying cooped up in his house all day was probably draining for him. “I,” Sasuke had said in the next letter, “have a plan to not be bored.” Itachi was supportive—he always wanted his little brother to be happy. “I,” Sasuke had said in one memorable letter, “am going to start dating someone.”
Itachi Uchiha had to look up what the word “dating” meant because apparently he had a different definition of it than his dear younger brother. After all, what could he possibly find exciting about figuring out the general time-frame someone lived in from nothing but their corpse? After scouring the dictionaries he kept in his house—all of which were dark and faded and practically falling apart in his hands—he realized that whatever new definition “dating” had acquired was much newer than he suspected. So, he requested his errand-runner to grab him a modern dictionary. His errand-runner did not disappoint.
After figuring out this new definition, Itachi was still confused. “So,” he had written to Sasuke, “you want to marry someone?”
“No,” was the reply (and Itachi could hear the exasperation through the paper), “I just want a relationship. No serious commitment.”
Itachi had stared at his paper, stunned. Dating...he’d never thought of something quite like it. He definitely didn’t suspect that anyone he knew would partake in it. He was hopelessly lost, but he was also Itachi Uchiha, older brother of Sasuke Uchiha, and he would act accordingly. He had picked up his brush and written a letter in reply. In that letter was one very distinct sentence: “I’m happy for you.”
You see, Itachi Uchiha did not need to understand, he only needed to know that his brother was happy. That is the mark of love, and Itachi Uchiha wasted no time in providing it.
As for Sasuke Uchiha, his older brother’s support was all he needed. Sasuke grinned. “I,” he’d said, “am going to date someone!” The only problem was that he had no idea who’d be willing to date him.
And that, dear readers, brings us to the current situation, in which Sasuke is sitting at a table at a food-stall that has been set up for the night’s festivities. No one comes close to him out of fear and confusion—why is an Uchiha out of his house? Aren’t all Uchiha shut-ins? After the third time a panicked mother pulls a young child away from his general direction, Sasuke despondently sips his tea and thinks, This isn’t working out well. He pauses. Well, at least I haven’t been asked to leave the area. Judging from the looks of the guards, though, he’s about to be.
Realizing that there is no way to win, he pays for his tea, stands up, and walks away. He can hear the muttering behind him. Sasuke Uchiha walks for a good while—a few days in fact—just wallowing in his misery. He wants many things—one of which being someone to console him—but he doubts that he’ll ever get them. Is this what he is doomed to? Really, Sasuke doesn’t even need to date someone. He wants someone to be happy with—lover or friend. And yet it seems like no one wants to get near him.
After three days of non-stop walking, he arrives at someplace unfamiliar. It’s a peaceful little lake in a serene corner of this pristine forest. Sitting on the dock of the lake is an equally picturesque woman. Her lovely sunset hair is tied up in a knot and her obviously expensive kimono is pulled up so she can freely dangle her legs in the water. (If Fugaku Uchiha had seen this, he would have been scandalized. Itachi would have been uncomfortable, and his mother, his lovely mother, couldn’t have cared less.) Sasuke would have been interested—possibly enthralled—if another quality about her hadn’t made itself abundantly apparent: this woman is no human.
Sure, she looks human, but there’s a distinct sense of “other” coating the entire area. She radiates peace and power in a way Sasuke has never witnessed before, and it immediately sets him at ease. Maybe that is why he approaches her instead of walking away. Despite not looking at him even once, she scoots aside and lets him sit next to her when he arrives at the edge of the dock. And, when he does, she says something that he is not expecting: “Hi, Sasuke.”
He pauses. If her aura wasn’t so calming, he would have immediately given into his reflex to jump a good one hundred feet away from her and get into a defensive position—the Uchiha have lived for this long for a reason—but instead he just feels mildly disturbed. “How do you know my name?”
She turns and gives him a lovely little smile, full of fondness. “Why wouldn’t I know your name?”
“For any number of reasons, one of which being that you live in the middle of nowhere.”
“Ah, Sasuke Uchiha, how do you know I live here?”
And Sasuke frowns and wonders why he had said that because, yes, he doesn’t know where she lives...except she does. Sasuke knows without a doubt that she lives here—that, every day, she breathes this air and walks this earth. He knows the same way he knows that she’s not human.
(Sasuke is a thousand years old, ancient compared to many. In his family, he is the youngest, but the rest of the Uchiha are only five hundred or so years older than him. A third thing that Sasuke is absolutely sure about this woman is that, compared to her, he is not even an infant.)
He comprehends this in a few seconds, and still he remains silent. The not-human next to him tilts her head. “You want to know something.” She smiles again and leans closer. “You just have to ask, and I will tell.”
Sasuke considers very carefully, the cogs in his brain slowly starting to turn—he resurfaces many memories that he has long since compressed into simple facts. He remembers in seconds what it would take a scholar five lifetimes to learn. Slowly, he remembers a woman who stood next to him when he was so young that he only reached up to her knee. He remembers her smiling sweetly as his parents watched on. He remembers her gently caressing his face. He remembers a voice: “Sasuke, child, we will meet again one day, and until then, you have my blessing. Live on.”
Slowly, Sasuke comprehends. “Sakura,” he says, eyes faraway. “Are you Sakura-sensei?”
“You remember!” she exclaims, absolutely delighted. “All on your own, too. I thought I would have to remind you.”
“I apologize, Sensei.” He bows his head, only for her to gently bat at his arm.
“Sasuke, you’re over five hundred years old, and I haven’t taught you in a long time. You are not to call me Sensei.”
“I apologize again.” He pauses, hesitates, and asks, “What has happened to—“
“Your other Sensei?” she finishes, eyes soft. “It’s long past their time Sasuke. You know that you are one of the few you live this long. I will have you know that your Kakashi-sensei and Iruka-sensei would be proud of you.”
Sasuke stares down at his legs, slightly overwhelmed. “I forgot you,” he confesses.
Sakura snorts. “I am not surprised. Your parents have forgotten me, too, as has your brother. In fact, I’d say the only Uchiha who remembers me is Shisui.”
Sasuke concedes to that. Shisui seems to remember everything and is always eager to share his memories—the only family member that is able to deal with his particular brand of annoyance is Itachi...and, well, that is because he’s Itachi. He would deal with anything for Sasuke and Shisui.
Another question enters his mind. “I need to call you Sensei one more time—I have a question for you to answer.”
“What is it?”
“What am I, Sakura-sensei? Why am I still alive?” It sounds deep and philosophical, but it really isn’t. Sasuke has lived longer than any empire and he doesn’t know why—it’s not necessarily a question that troubles him, but he figures that it would be nice to know.
Sakura hums, considering. “Sasuke...you were born to two people who are not human. As for what you are, let me ask you this: can you walk into a holy shrine of Heaven yet?”
Sasuke sighs. “No.” Every time he tries, he’s overwhelmed by an overwhelming sense of wrongness, an intuitive feeling that he does not belong. It’s not unbearable, but it’s abundantly clear to Sasuke that the members of Heaven want nothing to do with him. “But I can walk into your shrines.”
“Well, I’m no Yes-man. I will do what I believe is right—Heaven be damned!” A roll of thunder resounded through the woods despite the bright, clear sky. Sakura looks like she couldn’t care less. “I believe that, despite your unholy origins, you Uchiha are wonderful. You certainly haven’t given me any reason to believe otherwise.”
“I am unholy?”
“You were,” she corrects. “Demonic warlords, once upon a time. But look how far you have come! Even Heaven has learned to tolerate you!” She smiles and looks up at the sky. “You’ll accept my dear Sasuke Uchiha one day! You’ll have to!” The sky gives her no response, and yet she still looks quite smug. Then, as if realizing something, she says, “Oh, Sasuke, why have you come out of your little village? I know you’re a man of the times, unlike the rest of your hermit family, but this is quite a stretch, even for you.”
“Not really. It’s only a three day walk.”
“Sasuke, dear, I don’t remember teaching you how to walk on water.”
Sasuke has to dig through his memory a bit before he remembers that, yes, he had walked across the sea to arrive here and, yes, he was taught how to walk on water a good deal after he parted ways with Sakura. (It was on a lazy afternoon while visiting Shisui with his brother when the man had offered to teach him. Sasuke was curious, and so it was done.) “I learned,” is all he says. He then pauses. “I came here because I was sad.”
She frowns and squeezes his arm. “Why were you sad?”
“I have recently learned that I have no friends—no one seems to like me, actually—and, thus, I can’t seem to get a date.”
Sakura stares at him blankly for a moment. “Ah, I knew this day would come but I still wasn’t prepared. Sasuke, I taught you people skills, didn’t I?”
“What good are people skills if no one will get close to me? Moreover, you’re a deity—your people skills are probably not very well developed.”
“Fair enough,” she concedes. “But you’re an avid reader, are you not? Have you learned things through that?”
“Well, yes,” he mutters, a bit red. “I love romance novels, but I don’t think that I could ever do something quite as bold as the men in them do.”
“So you need someone who will be bold with you,” Sakura concludes. “Someone who will take charge of the situation and shower you with love and affection.”
“Ideally,” Sasuke agrees. “But I doubt it will be easy to find someone like that.”
“If,” she says softly, “you can’t find another...I’m always here for you, Sasuke.”
Sasuke considers. Really, he had expected her to say something similar, but not quite in this context. Sasuke stares at the woman who loved and cared for him and is offering to continue to do so. He stares at the woman who is prepared to care for him in a way that he thought no one ever would. And then Sasuke looks at himself—at the descendant of a demon who had ascended from Hell, a man who desperately wants companionship and who ran away when he realized that he would get none at his home. He wonders at both her and himself, sitting here on this dock. Sasuke finds himself full of yearning and Sakura full of patience and kindness.
Sasuke can only find it in himself to say, “Thank you, Sakura.”
Sakura smiles. “You’re very welcome, my dear Sasuke.”
One week later:
Shisui Uchiha is completely unprepared for when Itachi shows up at his house, completely unannounced, with a look of complete and utter desperation on his face. Shisui, of course, lets him in, because he’s nice like that.
“So,” he asks brightly, “what’s wrong?”
“Sasuke is dating someone.”
Shisui blinks. “That’s great! Who’s the lucky person?”
“Some girl named Sakura,” Itachi says dismissively. “But I’m still confused. Should I visit her? How should I address her? What is even the point of dating?”
Shisui, however, has stopped listening. Instead, he exclaims, “Sakura-sensei?!”
Itachi pauses. “You know her? Is she nice?”
Shisui just puts his head in his hands and, slowly, starts to remind Itachi of the woman that he used to hug whenever he felt sad and constantly demanded that she carry him everywhere. His response is expected: “Sakura-sensei?!”
Good times.
the end