Chapter Text
“So,” Giovani said, standing in front of the room of rangers. “We have a new CO coming in today, and I need everyone on your best behavior. So, that means Sada and Turo, just, don’t say anything stupid. Cyrus, no more angry outbursts. Lysandre, Piers, no disparaging comments about the rest of us. Guzma, just, just don’t.”
“Hey,” Guzma yelled, straightening up in his seat. “Why aren’t you calling out Rose and Lusamine?”
“Because they can be polite,” Giovani said, looking up to glare at the ceiling. “Do you remember the incident with Professor Birch?”
“He bumped the Jenga table, and you know it,” Guzma pouted.
“Point is we need to make a good impression on the new CO,” Giovani sighed.
“Seems a bit cruel to lie to them, don’t you think?” Piers shrugged, picking at his chipped nail polish.
“It’s not like they’re going to stay long anyway,” Lysandre pointed out, leaning down to pet his Pyroar. “No one wants to be sent to such a backwater outpost. They’ll just leave as soon as a better spot opens up.”
“Be that as it may,” Rose said, straightening his posture. “We should strive to put our best foot forward.”
“If we’re trying to put our best foot forward than we should probably send Guzma home early,” Cyrus smirked, kicking his feet up onto his desk.
“Cyrus!” Giovani snapped. “What did I literally just say?”
“You told Piers and Lysandre they couldn’t make disparaging comments,” Cyrus reminded him. “You never said I couldn’t.”
“I crave death,” Giovani groaned, letting out a heavy sigh. “Just get to work. Dismissed.”
*Meep*
“So…” Piers said, walking over to Guzma’s desk to toss down a file. “Giovani wants you out of the office.”
“Oh, come on,” Guzma whined, crossing his arms. “What did I do this time?”
“Cause there’s a Joltik swarm at some guy’s house and you’re the bug type specialist dumb-dumb,” Piers smirked, flipping open the folder with the complaint. “Also, you’re taking Ortega with you. His fairy types should be useful against them; also, I just don’t wanna deal with him today.”
“Why do I have to babysit?” Guzma asked, glaring back at the Galarian.
“Look, you can take Turo if you want,” Piers shrugged, gesturing over to the other side of the room where the aforementioned ranger had his fingers stuck in a finger trap. “Might take a while though.”
“Doesn’t he have a doctorate in Time Brake science or something?” Guzma asked, mouth hanging open slightly. “How does this shist keep happening?”
“I have no clue,” Piers agreed, shaking his head. “Maybe he invested all his brain cells in that and left out common sense? Either way, I’m pretty sure you can handle this yourself. And it’ll be a good first job for Ortega. I already warned Melli.”
“Melli’s place again?” Cyrus asked, turning away from his desk. “Do we need to have another talk with Emmet?”
“That sounds like a future CO’s problem,” Guzma shrugged, grabbing his pokeballs off his desk. “Ya boy’s gotta go.”
“Ortega’s waiting for you in the lobby,” Piers called after him. “And don’t let Emmet offer him a glass of Joltiks; we don’t need another Bede incident.”
*Meep*
“Excited for your first mission kiddo?” Guzma asked, barreling through the lobby towards the carts.
“Um, more worried actually,” Ortega corrected, fiddling with his staff. “Why did Bede warn me? And why did I have to grab buckets?”
“Well, you’re about to find out why almost everyone here has a Galvantula,” Guzma grinned, gesturing for Ortega to throw the buckets into the back of the cart. “And why Professor Sycamore’s started handing them out as a second starter.”
“Great,” Ortega nodded, reluctantly climbing into the cart. “Is it too late for me to just go to Juvie?”
“Yep,” Guzma agreed, gesturing for Ortega to fasten his seatbelt. “You’re the most responsible person here. And if you leave then I’m gonna have to be responsible.”
*Meep*
A few hours later they arrived back at the base with only 3/4ths of a bucketful of Joltiks and a brand-new shiny member added to Ortega’s team.
“Behold!” Guzma called, striding into the Bouffalant pen, holding the bucket of Joltik above his head. “Our new CO, the bucket o’ Joltiks!” he yelled, not noticing a tall, red-haired man standing by the podium, or Giovani and Rose franticly trying to gesture him to shut up, or even Piers and Lysandre trying to hold back their laughter. “And their first decree as Commander of the Nine-Nine is that the bugs shall take over the region, and we shall help them in their quest.”
“Ah,” the new red-haired man said, voice dripping with sarcasm. “I suppose if you already have a new commander I should go back to headquarters.”
“Guzma,” Giovani said through tightly gritted teeth. “This is our new commander, Maxie Matsubusa.”
“Oh,” Guzma said, freezing from the embarrassment. “Well, there went my dignity. Sense it seems like I’ve already blown my chance at a good impression I’m gonna leave now. I’m off to surrender myself to the Joltiks.”
“Nice try,” Rose snorted, letting his Copperajah out to block the doorway. “You’re not getting away from this that easy. And you never had dignity to begin with.”
“I’ll take those,” Lysandre said, still trying to hold back his laughter as he took the bucket of Joltiks away. “I’m sure Augustine would love to meet our new commander.”
“Well then,” Maxie said, clapping his hands to get everyone’s attention. “I am Maxie Matsubusa, and I have been assigned as the new commander of the Nine-Nine. I will be observing you all for the next few days to see how you all carry out your investigations. If any of you need Giovani or me, we will be in my office.”
*Meep*
As soon as the door to the office closed behind them, Giovani heard Piers finally crack and let out his badly contained laughter, followed closely by Guzma starting to complain while Lusamine mocked his expressions behind him.
“Now,” Maxie said, gesturing for Giovani to sit across the desk from him. “Could you please tell me about the team? Headquarters didn’t tell me much of anything.”
“All right then,” Giovani sighed, covering his face with his hands while sighing deeply. “First up is Dr. Sada. She is one of the world’s top experts in prehistoric Pokémon and the issues with reintroducing them to the wild in modern times. However, she cannot be allowed out in the field by herself, after the incident in Pacifidlog Town. Dr. Turo is also one of our top experts, but in manmade Pokémon. And just like Sada, he’s not allowed out on missions by himself after the incident in Fallarbor Town. Volo is currently out on assignment checking in on the People of the Underground, but he’s specialty is in the religions and cults focused around Pokémon. He’s the one to make sure that all Pokémon required for rituals are being properly taken care of. He’s not nearly as bad in the field as Sada and Turo, but…” Giovani continued, looking up at the ceiling as though asking for strength. “He is also the reason why there are scorch marks along the side of the building.”
“Dear Arceus,” Maxie said, mouth slightly hanging open from the shock. “No wonder they didn’t tell me anything about this station.”
“Thankfully those are the main problem children here,” Giovani said, trying to reassure his new boss. “Next up would be Piers; he’s the head of our Youth Program. If you ever need help with the members of the Youth Program, ask him. Just, fair warning, he is completely incapable of not being snarky. Lysandre has the same sarcasm problem as Piers, but instead of doing administration work, he specializes in rehabilitating abused Pokémon who still want to work with trainers. His husband helps reintroduce them to young trainers by handing them out as starters. They also run a Pokémon adoption agency for ones who would be better suited as pets. Lusamine is in charge of Pokémon that don’t originate from Earth, making sure that they can either return to their home world or get integrated safely for all involved. She’s normally quite level-headed, but when she cracks, things can get … a little wild. Rose is the expert in Pokémon used for industrial settings – making sure they are being treated fairly. He’s also the one who came up with the idea of using Joltiks to help power this station.”
“Is that why Guzma came in with a bucket of Joltiks?” Maxie asked, massaging his head to try and alleviate his headache.
“Oh no,” Giovani shook his head, flinching from the memories. “That’s Volo’s fault, his roommate is a Joltik breeder. Which reminds me, you’re going to need to have a talk with him soon.”
“Wonderful,” Maxie sighed, glaring down at the desk. “Let’s just wrap this up so I can talk to Piers about the Youth Program.”
“Good luck with that one,” Giovani said, glancing over at the window to the office to see Cyrus lying prone on the ground while Guzma was trying to sneak up behind Sada to hide one of the extra Joltiks in her hair. “Ahh, Cyrus. Despite being quite abrasive, he’s the one here in charge of caring for Pokémon who have suffered abuse – usually ones that either come to us knowing the move Frustration or who were unable to evolve because their evolution required high friendship. His entire team is made up of rescued Pokémon. And Guzma, well, he’s very good at his job, he specializes in bug types, who are at higher likelihood of being abandoned by trainers. The only problem is… he has no idea how to be a competent adult.”
“You don’t say,” Maxie nodded, watching as Sada threw a confetti bomb at Guzma. “You’re dismissed, please send Piers in here?”
*Meep*
“You asked for me?” Piers asked a few minutes later, leaning back in his seat while picking at his nail polish.
“Yes,” Maxie said, shuffling the paper work on his desk around to pull out the list of students in the Youth Program. “I wanted to go over the students, Headquarters told me nothing about this station.”
“Course they didn’t,” Piers snorted, flipping his hair back. “They didn’t want to scare you off like the last five people. So, what exactly do you want to know?”
“Could you tell me about the members of our Youth Program?” Maxie asked, leaning forward to listen more closely.
“Sure,” Piers said, putting his feet up on the other chair. “First up would be N. He’s the one closest to graduating to becoming a normal ranger. His main role here at the Nine-Nine is translating what Pokémon have to tell us, as he’s able to speak directly to them. Jessie, James, and Meowth also help with translating between humans and Pokémon. The main difference being N usually translates for Pokémon who are staying under our care, whereas Jessie, James, and Meowth mostly work with our Outreach Program for new trainers.”
“We have an Outreach Program?” Maxie asked, clearly frustrated with how little he knew about his new posting. “I hate Ghetsis so much. He told me literally nothing about this station.”
“Sounds like him,” Piers agreed, fiddling with his hair. “Also tell the team you hate Ghetsis, they’ll love you forever for that. Not even his own likes him.”
“Trust me,” Maxie said darkly. “If I hadn’t met his husband myself I would have thought no one liked him.”
“Anyway,” Piers shrugged. “Next up is Bede. He doesn’t really specialize in anything. However, he is a strong trainer with good type coverage with his Psychic and Fairy types. He’s also pretty good with raising Pokémon from eggs – so if we find any abandoned eggs, he’s the one who takes care of them until they hatch. And finally, there are the members of the former Team Star, all of whom are here as community serious after the incident with the Paldean League. Penny is basically our Tech Department. Ortega helped build our vehicles. Mela helps take care of the Charcadets who help fuel the carts and the Joltiks who power the station. Giacomo, Atticus, Eri, and Carmon don’t specialize in anything in particular; they mostly do whatever needs being done around the station.”
“Thank you, Piers,” Maxie said, gesturing for the dark type trainer to leave the office. “This has been very helpful.”