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The Big Gay Divorce

Summary:

Two love birds get DIVORCED. This is the reason Purple didn't go to Huggy Wuggy's wedding.

Work Text:

Once upon a divorce, two love birds sat in the grim divorce office.
“Huggy Wuggy, I don’t love you anymore.” said Purple.
“Why would you say that :(.” Is what Huggy would have said if he could speak, instead he just made a noise similar to a barn owl screech. Nagito was the divorce lawyer guy, as he recently discovered his passion for breaking up relationships 👏.
“Purple, do you swear that you will always hate Huggy Wuggy for as long as you shall live ?”
“I do” with the 😈emoji.
“And Huggy Wuggy, do you take Purple as your thoughtfully hated ex-husband? To hate each other in sickness and in health?” Huggy Wuggy let outs scream of confirmation.
“Then I, Nagito Komaedo, hereby sentence you as EX-HUSBANDS!” Nagito-being one for dramatics- slammed down a giant gavel on his desk.
Outside the Divorce Office, Huggy Wuggy was sitting on the pavement and crying. He knew he did the right thing divorcing Purple-who had committed various acts of mail fraud since he met him- but he couldn’t help but feel terribly alone. Nagito had given him some commemorative popsicle sticks, but he had already eaten the popsicle part, so he was just left gnawing on the stick part.
Suddenly, a figure began approaching him. He had the most beautiful blue skin, with a gorgeous shining crown, and with the most striking blue orbs. Huggy gasped and jumped up. Him and the blue stranger began sniffing one another-like cats do-.
“Hi, I’m Blue 😏” Says Blue. Huggy greets Blue with his turkey vulture hiss. Blue blushes at his directness.
“So.. you wanna hang out at Medieval Times with me, babygirl?” Huggy nodded. And so was the beginning of the most beautiful-and slightly horrifying- relationship between two gay monsters.

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