Chapter Text
Gusu Lan University has officially accepted your admission application."
JC read these lines over and over again, partially because he couldn’t believe he had made it! into his dream university—well, 'their dream university.'
As the joy of the news slowly dimmed, JC felt sadness rush in. Tears trickled down his face as he stared at his laptop. It hurt, truly. how he wanted to celebrate this news with him or even attend the same university. It was all gone; his dreams were shattered, and there was no way he could fix them. He couldn’t move on; his whole world revolved around that person, and when the time came, JC was all alone. JC wiped his tears and stood up, gathering his things. It was better if he left sooner to arrange everything early. Or perhaps the silence of the house haunted him.
(first day of university)
JC softly caressed the picture that had become worn out. Two figures intertwined tightly as they laughed towards the camera. JC doubted if he would see such happiness in his own eyes again. He tore his gaze off the photo and stuffed it into his bag. Carrying the bag on his shoulder, he made his way to the living room.
Thoughts continuously spiralled in his head.
"What should I wear?"
"Will I be able to make it?"
"After all, it is a prestigious place for elites."
He returned his attention to the house and walked through the familiar rooms, watching and dreaming of that lost joy. Reaching his room, he opened his closet. Violets, fuschias, and burgundies filled the whole closet to the point that it was disgusting. Scratching his cheek with embarrassment, he hesitated about his outfit.
"I never really realised my obsession for purple was that bad!" He murmured. Regardless, he finally put together a decent outfit (that was completely purple.).He put on an extremely pale lilac shirt underneath with a darker violet sleeveless sweater on top. The lilac shirt's ends peeked from underneath the sweater, giving it some depth, while he put on the most basic jeans, which just gave a slight shade of purple. He topped off his outfit with a pair of purple sneakers with black outlines.
Looking at himself in the mirror, he knew he was going to stand out. JC tried to imagine people looking at him, and a wave of uncomfortable goosebumps spread all over him. He removed his sweater right away and put on a plain black hoodie in its place. He was relieved that he had chosen something that would not draw too much attention. His umber-coloured hair was a mess to tie. He ran his fingers through the locks a few times before tucking it beneath the hood. Checking himself out for the final time, he rushed out of his apartment with his stuff.
The imposing stone castle towered over the apartment buildings below. Cloud Recesses was known to be a backwards area, with its residents still adhering to old ways of life. In spite of the latest progress in technology, you could still spot distinct remnants of the old city here and there. The massive castle was nestled among the many houses that intertwined down the streets in the city's heart. Reminding the people of the Lan family's past, the castle evoked a sense of awe, mystery, and nostalgia. The castle had now been wonderfully transformed into an educational institute. The walls, which had previously been stone grey, had been painted a warm cream, and the narrow archer holes had been replaced by massive windows. It was a far cry from the gloomy atmosphere of its past, and now a new generation of students filled the hallways, learning their subjects in language, science, and literature, among others.
JC inhaled deeply and craned his neck to survey the entire massive structure. Around him, an excited crowd bustled around. The campus's entrance gates were lined with expensive cars, with butlers and servants escorting students to the stairs. Everywhere he looked, JC saw signs of affluence and privilege. Despite the comparatively subdued attire owing to Lan University's conservative standards, Jc was able to identify the expensive accessories and name-brand clothing. He felt like a black sheep among the flock. He had worked hard to get here, and he was proud of his achievements, yet he felt like an imposter amidst the more privileged students who could afford such luxuries.
He had run away from his hometown. Perhaps to avoid the shadows of his youth or because familiar faces continued to haunt him, He felt like a bird in a cage because of the disapproving looks and the expectations he could never meet. No matter how great he did, his hard work paled in comparison to his brother, regardless of whether it was actually superior. His brother's successes seemed to come effortlessly, and it was often too much for him to bear. Running away from the hell hole to greet a better life was just his wishful thinking, as yet again he was broken by someone he loved most.
Someone nudged him as they walked by, and JC woke up from his trance. He hurried towards the building, as he didn't want to be late to his classes on his first day. Entering the establishment gave JC the shock of his life. Light reflected from the massive crystal chandeliers that were suspended from the ceiling in the grand hallways. Antique paintings decorated the walls, and all of the furniture was immaculate. JC had never seen such luxury, and he began to worry that he was in the wrong place. When he turned to look at the other students, he was surprised to see that they were all acting very casually about the grandiosity of the setting, as if they were accustomed to such lavishness.
"Can I help you?" A light voice rang
JC spun around to see a young woman smiling politely at him. Around her neck hung a staff identity card, spelling "Rose" and "student guide" underneath it. Despite the grandeur of the setting, Rose's demeanour and attitude were very down-to-earth and friendly. JC felt relieved to find a person; he could ask for help without feeling condescending.
"I am looking for my class; I don't really know where to go." JC
Rose replied warmly, "Don't worry! ""It's easy to get lost in a place like this."
"Well, can I know the subjects you signed up for?" Rose reached into her bag.
"Uh, medicine," Jc replied immediately.
Rose smiled as she took out a clipboard. She turned through the pages as she searched for JC's subject.
"Ah, there we go! ""The introductory class is in room 8, so go to the left corridor and follow the signs; I'm sure you'll find your way there." She gestured left.
While walking down the left corridor, JC said a quick thank you. His footsteps echoed on the tiled floor as he ventured further, following the signs that pointed him in the right direction. As the bell rang sharply, JC realised how much time he had wasted trying to find his class.
Jc rushed towards his class, filled with dread.
"Alright, since everyone has gathered here for the class, let's start." I am sure many of you originate from the same circles among yourselves, but let us have everyone do their introductions regardless. Starting from the young man at the far left, introduce yourself."
As he waited his turn for introductions, Jc was still gasping for air.
"The boy in the black hoodie!"
JC eyes shot up to the professor, and he realised that everybody was staring at him.
"My name is Jiang Cheng."
Silence falls in the lecture hall.
"And? What inspired you to choose this topic, and where are you from? What do you intend to do after that? Jiang Cheng, what else do you know about yourself?" The professor spoke up.
JC thought for a second, then replied.
"Medicine appears to be the most stable path; in general, I intend to continue in medicine, and my hometown isn't exactly interesting."
The professor nodded and gestured for JC to sit down. JC felt anxious under everybody's scrutiny, so when the gaze moved onto the next person, he finally took a breath. The imposter syndrome was something that had been ingrained in JC's mentality since birth. He was never the right piece to fit the puzzle, be it his family, his class, or any of his relationships. No matter how hard he tried, he always felt like an outsider. And though he had forced himself to understand that people don't really care about strangers, he would still subconsciously feel that there was someone judging him regardless.
Albeit the initial hesitation, JC felt that the professor was a wonderful person, unjudging, and maintained a flow in the class. He breathed out in relief; perhaps his life at this university wouldn't be too bad if he didn't bump into LXC again.
"The gentleman in the back, last introduction," the professor called out.
A clear, silvery sound rang out.
"People may know me as Lan Xichen; I am studying medicine, well, because why not?" The man replied with a laugh.
JC immediately turned back to the source. Catching a glance between the seated students, Jc's heart froze. As if time had stopped, everything around him had halted. His eyes met his old love, now a stranger, with whom he had not kept in touch for so long.
Cedar-coloured hair cascaded all over the back, revealing a chiselled, charming face. In the distance, at the back of the row, stood a tall gentleman. His face was soft and slender, and he had light brown eyes, straight brows, and a jaw that was sharply defined. He smiled softly as he glanced at everyone. He wore an immaculate white suit that hugged his figure and a blue-patterned tie, which added a touch of vibrancy to the otherwise dull palette. The man's presence was unmistakable; his demeanour was refined and gentle, but with a hint of something mysterious beneath the surface.
Jc's stomach tightened as he took in the sight of his old love. The bane as well as the boon of his existence. The man for whom JC was once ready to sacrifice everything.
Lan Xichen
.
.
Lan Huan
.
.
His gaze lingered on him for a few moments before being broken when LXC met eyes with his. Jc was overwhelmed with emotion, feeling both nostalgia and a new-found admiration for the person his love had grown into. From a bumbling, awkward teenager, he had magically become the everything-perfect prince of one's dreams. And worst of all, he attended JC's university. Every time JC would see LXC, it would feel like a wound had been reopened.
Jc immediately turned back, facing the professor as he stared holes into the table. All the sounds around him had turned into blurs.
"Shit, shit, shit," JC kept repeating in his mind. It was as if the heavens truly didn't favour him. He had to coincidentally be in the same UNI and even the same class as his ex. JC wanted to break something (preferably his own head). Concentrating on the rest of the class was basically mission impossible for JC, as he kept being paranoid that LXC was staring at him.
The bell rang again, indicating the end of the introductory session, and students began pouring out of the classroom. JC couldn't keep up with the rushing crowd, seemingly quite used to the layout of the building; hence, he decided that he would remain seated until the last second. An old trick he learned using local transportation most of his life As he sat there, he observed the chaotic scene and packed his belongings casually. He knew that once the crowd dispersed, he would be able to navigate through the building with ease.