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It was 10:45 am, which was far too early to be awake on a Sunday morning, but brunch was at 11:00 sharp and Bruce wasn’t about to argue with Alfred, particularly after the man’s very poignant “I expect you all there at precisely eleven” which, while spoken to all members of the family then present in the Cave, had been said while staring directly into Bruce’s soul.
That’s what it had felt like, at least, so here he was, only slightly regretting the fact that he had managed just three and a half hours of sleep. It had been important. And once he was fully awake he would remember what it was and thus be able to adequately justify his late night.
It was 10:58 and Bruce wasn’t the last one there. Perfect.
It was 10:59 and Tim and Duke came sliding around the corner. Damian rolled his eyes at the two and Bruce chuckled softly at the sight.
It was 11:00 and the doorbell rang.
Heads shot up and confused looks were exchanged.
Jason was the only one missing, but a) he didn’t have a reason to ring the doorbell, and b) he hadn’t been here last week and had already told them he might not be there today either. Okay, so he had told Steph, who had told Cass, who had told Dick, who had told him, but the point stood.
It was 11:01 and Bruce was ten steps behind Dick who had managed to reach the door first.
As Dick opened the door all movement came to an abrupt halt. A few more steps and Bruce looked out the door at whatever had caused the sharp pause. Who, more accurately.
“Hi,” said a small boy, looking perfectly comfortable standing outside the manor.
Bruce consciously closed his mouth, aiming for a cheerful look rather than a bewildered one.
“Hi,” Dick said back, crouching down to the boy’s level. “What’s your name?”
The boy stared at them for a moment. “I’m not supposed to tell my name to strangers,” he said.
Before either he or Dick could reply, however, the boy turned his head back to the minivan that Bruce was just now noticing was parked several yards away.
“Can I tell Grandpa my name?” He yelled.
Bruce bluescreened momentarily but valiantly recovered.
And then a much more familiar voice called out, “Go for it, bud.”
Who was this small child and why did Jason have said small child. And where on earth had his son gotten a minivan? And why?
“My name’s Liam,” the boy said proudly.
Well, at least that answered one question.
It was 11:05 and Bruce was looking at not one, but four children. The minivan was making more sense, even if the presence of the children had yet to be explained.
“Alright, kiddos, just follow Uncle Dickie into the dining room, okay?”
Three of the four cheerfully followed a bemused “Uncle Dickie” down the hall.
The fourth was in a baby carrier, so was understandably transported differently.
Bruce had so, so many questions.
Jason, however, did not offer any answers and instead followed the others as if this happened every day.
It was 11:06 and Bruce was the last one back in the dining room. He had been there on time, he wanted to point out.
“Sorry I’m late, Alfie,” Jason said, still neglecting to give any kind of explanation.
“That’s quite alright,” Alfred responded, looking and sounding equally as unperturbed.
Had he already known? Alfred was certainly someone Bruce could see Jason confiding such things to. But then again, Alfred was setting out places for the children now, so it was unlikely he had known either… You could rarely tell with Alfred. He never let a single thing slip.
“Uhh…” Steph’s confusion was mirrored by the rest of his kids.
“Right,” Jason said, setting the baby carrier down and undoing the buckles. “Introduction time. Kids? This is Grandpa Alfie, Grandpa Bruce, Uncle Dickie, Uncle Duke, Aunt Cass, Aunt Steph, Uncle Damian, and Uncle Tim. Guys, this is Gabriela, Liam, Zander, and Saylor,” he said, lifting the baby up at the last name.
“I’m Gabriela,” the oldest girl said “But call me Ellie. I’m seven.”
“It’s very nice to meet you,” Damian said, surprising at least half of them if anyone’s faces were anything to go by.
“Can you show me your swords after we eat?” Ellie asked.
Damian practically puffed up in his seat. “Of course,” he said proudly.
One more clue to this unexpected mystery; Jason had obviously told these kids something about the family already.
“How old are you, Liam?” Dick asked.
The boy apparently took that as an invitation to climb into Dick’s lap, and, once comfortably situated to his satisfaction, replied, “I’m six.”
“What about you, Zander?” Steph asked the younger boy who, though originally eager to follow Dick into the dining room, had now retreated behind Jason’s leg.
Zander peeked out and looked up at Jason who gave him an encouraging smile. Slowly he held up four fingers.
“You’re four?”
Zander’s face scrunched up. “I’m three,” he corrected.
Bruce’s mouth quirked at that, though he was far from the only one to do so.
Jason chuckled out loud and took a seat, managing to situate the baby while simultaneously hoisting Zander into his lap on the other side.
“And this is miss Saylor,” he said, “who is four months old now.”
“Saylor’s the baby,” Zander added sagely.
A few solemn, amused nods followed that statement from around the table.
“She can’t eat food,” Liam said. “Cause she’s a baby.”
“That’s right,” Jason said, giving the boy a fond grin. “Not yet, anyway.”
“Shall I prepare a bottle for the little lady?” Alfred asked, looking as if he might start cooing at the baby at any moment. Bruce wouldn’t blame him if he did.
“She ate right before we came,” Jason said, “so she should be good for a while.”
“She poops a lot,” Liam said.
“And it’s really stinky,” Ellie added.
And, with that vital piece of information shared, brunch began.
It was 12:37 and Bruce still hadn’t learned where these children had come from. Already he could hear his kids’ snarky replies in his head. Yes, he knew where babies came from, thanks. But what he didn’t know was how these children had arrived in Jason’s care or when. He had last seen Jason…nine days ago, he thought after a brief calculation. How was that anywhere close to enough time to acquire four children? Bruce again ignored the replies he could hear in his head, but even he hadn’t gained children that quickly. There had been at least eight months in between any of them. And Stephanie wasn’t even his kid (legally speaking, at least), so by that measure he could say sixteen months.
Regardless, it was a lot more time than nine days, if it had even been that long. For all he knew it had been yesterday that Jason had suddenly obtained children.
It was 1:20 and Bruce was mentally planning out his grandchildren’s bedrooms. Baby Saylor might not sleep in her own room for a while, but it never hurt to be prepared. He wondered what colors or themes the other kids would like.
It was 2:08 and Bruce had learned that Zander liked anything that could fly (including but not limited to birds, planes, and Superman - Bruce could work on that later), Liam’s favorite color was green and he liked dinosaurs (the Cave could be baby-proofed, surely), and Ellie wanted to be a doctor. Maybe she’d be a surgeon someday if her interest in sharp, pointy things to stab people with was anything to go by, a voice that sounded far too much like Steph said in his head. He put that thought aside for now.
“Why do we need rooms, though?” Ellie asked. “We already moved.”
“What, you buy a house or something?” Dick asked Jason teasingly.
“Yeah, the first few I looked at didn’t really fit so we didn’t get moved in until Friday,” Jason answered completely seriously.
Again. Nine days. Jason was a highly competent individual, of course, but Bruce had to be impressed with his efficiency.
“Wait, really?” Tim asked. “You actually bought a house?”
“Yes? Obviously. The old one didn’t have enough bedrooms.”
A moment of silence and then, “You already had a house?” came the question in five versions from five directions.
“Yeah. The one on Clintwood?”
Silence.
“Wait, you guys seriously didn’t know about that? I didn’t even try to hide that one.”
“Did you actually live there?” Cass asked.
“Well, no, not really. Mostly only stayed there when Lian came over.”
Lian. Liam. That was going to be a challenge.
“So what’s your house like?”
It was 2:42 and Bruce had learned from the kids that the house was “big” and “had a playground” and “tons of beds” and “a slide down the stairs.” He had learned from Jason that the house had five bedrooms, a basement (with a slide going down to it as Ellie reminded them all), a backyard, a full security system, and a garage apparently big enough to fit Jason’s bike, his other bike, the minivan, a sedan Bruce hadn’t known Jason had had but which he was now offering Steph, and the SUV he had apparently also managed to acquire in the last week or so.
The kids’ statement of the house having “tons of beds” was also not entirely exaggerated, as at Damian’s demand of when he could stay there Jason informed him that apart from the five bedrooms there were also multiple bunk beds in the basement.
Bruce had an entire manor with many, many bedrooms, yet his children were now loudly claiming bunks in a house they had never seen or known existed an hour ago.
It was 4:50 and Jason had just left the room to go get Zander from the room he had been taking a nap in. Bruce didn’t know why they had a baby monitor when pretty much the entire house was fully covered by security cameras, but Alfred had whipped one out of somewhere.
Liam was over in one corner playing a game with Dick, Duke, and Cass, and Ellie had enlisted Damian’s help in drawing a pirate ship now that Steph, the beloved fairy queen of an hour ago, had gone home.
Tim, meanwhile, had baby Saylor who was enjoying a post-nap bottle.
Bruce closed his eyes and relaxed in his seat a bit. This was nice.
“Looks like it’s your turn for a nap, Grandpa,” Jason teased as he came back into the room.
Bruce’s eyes shot open.
Grandpa.
That’s what Jason had called him this morning, but…
He was a Grandpa now.