Chapter Text
The clock's hands on the kitchen wall read 11:17pm. Normally by this time Dick would have been running across the rooftops of the city for over an hour, but things had been different the last few days. It had been two nights since there had been any sightings of Blüdhaven's protector, since the fight between the bluebird and Blockbuster, which ended with the police finding two bodies - one of the troubled vigilante Tarantula and the other belonging to the villain who had been causing trouble in the city. The news speculated what had happened and where their black and blue protector was. And, from what he could find out, it was circulating among criminals that while she would have killed Blockbuster, someone else had taken their chance and killed her. The question hovered over what Nightwing's role in all of this would have been. The police, oddly enough, seemed inclined to believe the criminals' theory on the matter, after all it was known that their vigilante did not kill. The acrobat, however, didn't care about the theories circulating about him, especially since he doubted anyone would find anything that related or connected them to what really happened on that rooftop. Jay was a trained bat and he knew how to clean up after himself, and if his little brother said he'd taken care of the problem, then he was pretty sure Jay had done what he said.
As for the matter of Nightwing's disappearance, the first night he didn't go out because Dick was too shaken up by all the recent events to even think about patrolling. No matter how much evidence he had that Jason was alive, he couldn't shake the fear, honestly not so irrational, that his little brother would disappear if he so much as walked away for a few minutes. Luckily, he had taken a leave of absence from his duties at the police department for a few days, something that coincided with his weekend off – an excuse he used to deal with the whole Blockbuster situation – so, only on Monday would he have to worry about his job. The following night Nightwing didn't come out again, Dick still wasn't well physically and even his fear of Jay disappearing had not subsided. By the third night, however, the acrobat knew he could no longer avoid the call of duty, even if the thought of going out on patrol and leaving Jay behind made his stomach in knots. Still, he persisted and struggled to put on the uniform – his cracked ribs reminding him all the time that this wasn't the best idea. Minutes later, while crossing the room towards the window to the fire escape, he found his path blocked by a 6'1 muscle wall. There was a thunderous expression on his little brother's face and Dick already knew what was coming before he even opened his mouth to speak.
"Jay, I need to go."
"You're still hurt, don't think I didn't see you flinch every time you took a deep breath."
"I've fought with worse wounds." – he knew he had used the wrong argument when he saw the acid green glow in his little brother's eyes, deepening even more the already existing frown. – "Jay, I've been away for too long and with Blockbuster out of the picture I'm sure the power vacuum will only bring problems. I cannot in good conscience stand by and let the city burn.”
"You know you're not alone anymore, right?"
"Jay-"
"I was there, Dick. I still see green when I think about what would have happened if I hadn't come when I did." - Dick fought against the involuntary shudder the thought of that night provoked, it didn't stop him from feeling his skin crawl and the bile threatening to rise in his throat whenever the memory of the phantom touch of slender fingers emerged in his mind. - "You need help." – his little brother persisted – "From a partner who won't turn against you. Someone you can trust to watch your back."
"I can't drag you back into this life."
"You're not forcing me into anything, it's my choice. If anything, I'm the one not giving you a choice. If you want to keep fighting, you are not going to do it alone. And especially not when you're not in good physical condition.”
He knew he should have expected that kind of reaction. You can leave the Robin costume, but you never stop being a vigilante. Dick should know, after all when Bruce took Robin from him Nightwing appeared. He was also aware that he couldn't stop Jay from returning to that life, even though he would rather his little brother stay well out of harm's way. It was a hypocritical wish on his part when he constantly put himself in danger. And if the fire in his little wing's blue-green gaze meant anything, it was that this desire to protect was mutual. Jason didn't want to see him get hurt any more than he wanted to see Jay get hurt. Knowing that didn't stop him from feeling that accepting the imposed help was the same as dragging his little brother back into danger. It also didn't help that, even though he was reluctant, Dick had to admit that a part of him was thrilled by the idea of fighting side by side with Jason like the brothers they were.
“If the situation is so bad, what do you expect to do with your ribs about to break? The first idiot who gets lucky could send you to the hospital with a punctured lung. And then instead of a few nights soaking, it's going to be a lot more time in the bench. Besides, if you insist on leaving anyway, we both know I'll just follow you.” Jason saw his silence for the hesitation it was and went in for the kill with his argument.
Dick felt himself deflate. He knew how to recognize a losing battle when he found one and stubbornness now would get him nowhere. Furthermore, he had decided that he would not do anything that would alienate Jason from him, and rejecting his help was undoubtedly a way of alienating him. And Dick wasn't stupid, he knew he needed that help. He had been fighting for a long time on sheer willpower, caffeine and, as Jay had already pointed out, sugary cereal. He had been approaching a breaking point for a long time, in fact everything that happened that night his little brother returned was very likely his breaking point.
He had spoken to Jay about Bruce becoming a threat to himself and others leading to Tim having to intervene. Well, it looked like he was on the same path as his mentor and father figure, only it was his little wing who was the one intervening.
"I suppose if the city hasn't already burned with Nightwing gone for two days, it can hold out for one more night." - He found himself relenting with a sigh, only to be refuted.
"Three."
“Jay-
"It's either that or I'm taking your place."
"The uniform wouldn't fit you." – it was such a stupid argument that escaped his mouth, that Jay just stared at him for a few seconds as if making sure he had heard correctly, before answering slowly, his expression making it clear that he couldn't believe the two were even discussing it.
“I suppose not. This thing is too tight even for you. But then again, you've always been an over-the-top exhibitionist with poor fashion sense.”
“Hey! There's nothing wrong with my fashion sense, and the uniform isn't over the top, it's just tight enough to allow my acrobatics.”
“Need I point out the fact that you haven't denied being an exhibitionist? And tight enough? I had to get you out of the damn thing when I dragged you back. How you even get into that is beyond me.”
“I was born into a circus family, Jay, exuberance is part of the charm of any good act. And I never had any problems with the uniform.”
“Okay, whatever. Forget the damn thing. That was never the point of this conversation in the first place.” – his little brother complained, throwing him an exasperated look. – “The point is, you stay three more nights off the streets and let your cracked ribs heal a little longer and, if necessary to intervene in an emergency, I will do it for you, with or without the damn uniform.”
Dick opened his mouth to protest, argue some more, only for Jay to go straight for the jugular again.
“We both know that if Alfie was here, you'd be on the bench for at least a week, so don't even try.”
And just like that, he found himself deflating for good. Alfred was always the final card pulled whenever one of the bats was being especially stupid. The worst part was that it always worked. Nobody wanted to receive the butler's disappointed look, not even Bruce dared to cross that line without suffering the devastating effects that accompanied it.
“Three nights. Not anymore." - he acquiesces, receiving a nod of confirmation from Jay. - "As for being my partner... You're serious about it.” – it wasn't a question, not really, he could see in the intensity of his little wing's gaze that he hadn't spoken lightly. Which suggested it was something his little brother had already given thought to.
"Absolutely." – the answer came anyway.
Dick let out a sigh making his way over to the couch where he sank on the cushions with a shudder he didn't bother to disguise, it wasn't like he'd managed to fool Jason's trained eyes before. Honestly the acrobat was aware that he couldn't find a better partner. Even without knowing the full extent of the training his little brother had in his time with the League of Assassins – Jay had been rather vague about it, though he did mention a strange order of warriors who helped him in controlling the pit's effects –, the two of them had been trained by the Bat, and add in the boy's new physique and stature, and the fact that Jay wouldn't betray him and, well... It wasn't even a choice; it was obvious that his little wing would be perfect to fight by his side.
“I know it's hypocritical of me to say this, but I don't want to see you get hurt again. However, I understand that I cannot stop you, as yourself said. And I also know that I need help. It's just... Losing you was terrible, Jay.” – had been more than terrible, it had broken their family. Since Jason's death everything just seemed to fall apart more and more. Dick couldn't go through that again.
At his words the expression of Jay, who had collapsed on the sofa beside him, swayed a bit, something glinting in his eyes, a vulnerability that spoke to how much the acrobat had failed his little wing, to the point where the boy still looked surprised that Dick admitted to having suffered from his loss. This reminder crushed his heart, as it was proof of how foolish he had been. Back then Dick had been hurt, furious and childishly jealous. Bruce had kicked him out and given his colors and what his mother called him to another boy without even telling him anything (a pattern that never really changed). He had fought and sometimes dragged the boy into their fight. He would regret for the rest of his days the time wasted on his rage, inadvertently hurting a child who had nothing and no one else, who had grown up without real support and affection. Regretting taking so long to be the big brother figure Jason deserved. Because when he got his head out of his ass and finally realized that B had given him a little brother to love and care for, when he started to make any real progress in their relationship, Jason was ripped violently from them.
“I can't promise that nothing will happen. And you can't make me that promise either. That's not how things work and we'd be lying if we said the opposite. The best we both can do is try to protect each other.” - Jay's voice pulled him out of his spiral of dark thoughts, seeing his lil' brother there, alive, was a balm for his heart, as much as a reminder of his past failures. He had a second chance to right his wrongs and he was going to seize it. – “No one dragged me into this life the first time. No one is forcing me now. I knew what I was getting into when I put on that uniform, even though I never considered getting murdered the way it would all end. I chose to fight so I could protect those who couldn't do it themselves. Dying and coming back didn't change that. I may not be Robin anymore, but I still want to fight. I still want to protect the innocent.”
And what was Dick supposed to say in the face of such determination? How could he deny his little brother his wings when they had already been taken from him once? He understood how Jay felt, because he felt the same way. He couldn't keep him pinned to the ground because of his fears, his little wing might not be Robin anymore, but he could still fly, even if it was with new colors - like Dick himself did when he became Nightwing.
As he had been doing since Jay came back into his life, Dick ignored his instincts that screamed at him to hug his little brother and not let him out of his sight. Rather than giving in to his desires, he chose the next best thing he could do. As Jay said, they could protect each other, but only if they fought together.
“Okay, little wing. I'm guessing you have something on your mind, because it's pretty obvious you've been thinking about it. But we need to plan carefully.” - Jay's expression spoke volumes about what he thought of Dick's comment. – “Besides, I will choose your vigilante name.” – he added, more as a joke to lighten the mood than with real intent, the response he got was still priceless.
“You have to be kidding!” - The affront on his little brother's face was so familiar that Dick found himself laughing, something he hadn't done in a long time, despite his ribs protesting the movement.
“Big brother privileges.” - he proclaimed, enjoying the childish joke he thought he would never have the chance to play with his little wing again.
“Ah, now you’re demanding privileges. It will not happen. And don't even think I'm going to let you pick my uniform. You can't be trusted after that damn Discowing.” - despite the sharp look, blue was predominant in Jay's irises as he complained.
“Jaybird, are you going to deny your big brother this request?” – he whimpered wrapping his little brother in a hug, feeling the smile on his lips widen when Jay didn't make any move to push him away. – “We can have matching names!”
“Holy hell, no!”
“But Jayyyy.”
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In the end Dick still managed to pick the name, although he almost ended up with a black eye because of his comments and puns. It was totally worth the threats of violence when his Nightwing gained the company of Flamebird.