Work Text:
In the future, Mineta happily reaches the ripe, middle age of 45.
He let his hero license lapse years ago, in his early 20s, but keeps active on his quirk registration in order to continue his easy construction job. He’s been certified as a Construction Specialist and his quirk allows him to hold various construction materials together until they are permanently welded into place.
Shortly after he turned 22, Mineta married an incredibly attractive, tall, large-breasted young woman named Hana. She was, and he means this in every sense of the word, crazy. Sure, she was capable of living on her own and holding down a job, but beyond that - Mineta honestly isn’t sure how she survived past childhood. How had he even been attracted him to her in the first place? Ah, right, right right… it was her body that drew him in. It had been (drooling) love at first sight.
Mineta and Hana had a daughter together before they divorced. Thankfully, his daughter turned out sane, unlike her mother, and after raising her into adulthood Mineta had firmly decided that life should be lived as easily as possible. No wife, no young children to take care of, easy job.
He had been a registered hero for less than 5 years. He enjoyed the job, and as a naturally quick thinker and people pleaser, he had excelled in disaster-type rescues. But the novelty of hero-work and the ability to pull attractive friends and hang out with incredibly fit, scantily clad heroes wore off quickly. Hero work was, by nature, hard, stressful, and constantly filled with the threat of an early death.
Shortly after he got married, Mineta began stepping back his official duties. And by the time his daughter had turned one year old, he had officially retired as a hero.
Picking up a random, well-paying job in construction had been a stroke of luck Mineta still thanked the gods for. He loved working in that more blue collar environment anyway. At least half the people he worked with were as horny as him, and the type of perverted jokes they constantly told each other would not have been allowed if he were still a hero.
He fit in perfectly.
One of his best friends was a much younger, handsome man called Migi. He’d said of himself his first day on the job, “If I’m not with a woman at night, I’ll be with my right hand!” and the nickname Migi had naturally stuck.
Migi lived the sort of life that Mineta had only dreamed about when he was younger, sleeping with so many women the man had lost count years ago.
“Ah, I dunno how many women I’ve slept with, Min-chan!” Migi crossed his arms and closed his eyes in thought. “Maybe… if you average, say, 1.5 women during the week, up to 4 during national holiday weekends, and subtract the couple of times I was actually dating someone so I didn’t sleep around then… and I started when I was 15… and I’m 24 now…I’d say…” Migi hmm’ed and haw’ed a bit. “I’d guess around 400 women? Give or take another 50?” Migi took a quick glance around. “And I’ll share this with you, but don’t you dare spread it around!”
“Ooooh no! No no no, I would never!” Mineta clasped both his hands to his chest, excited to learn a secret.
“Well, back when I was younger I experimented with a few men too. Maybe 10 of them? Before I decided that no, I definitely like women best.”
Mineta couldn’t stop his bark of laughter. “Ain’t nothing wrong with that Migi-kun! I get it eh? Lots of dudes can have some go~orgeous asses on them.”
Migi laughed, too. “It’s true, it’s true!”
Mineta felt his eyes flutter as he let his mind drift to the thought of women’s bodies. “But, nothing beats a woman, with their full hips and soft skin and breasts that fit just right in your hands!”
Migi’s eyes were fluttering, too. “Oooh, don’t I know it Min-chan!” he whispered conspiratorially.
“OY!” The shift supervisor, Touji, had spotted them. “Migi! Min-chan! Stop screwing around dreaming ‘bout women and get back to work!” he shouted.
Mineta laughed loudly, throwing his head back. “Touji! You know you want in on this conversation!”
“Yeah, yeah - there’s 2 hours left of work Mineta!” Touji had an impressively loud voice, able to be easily heard over the general construction sounds. “We’ll get a drink on Friday and you can tell me all about it then!”
“It’s a deal Touji! I’m holding you to it!” Mineta pointed a forceful finger at his supervisor and Touji waved his assent.
Mineta and Migi turned to each other. “See you after shift, Migi?”
“At Buba’s, yeah?” Migi gave him a pat on the back and began to turn away. “I gotta go finish up inspecting the new I-beams that arrived on site. Might be running a little late after shift end.”
“Don’t sweat it Migi! I’ll just be sitting at the bar, doing my thing. I’ll see you there if you don’t get off too late.”
Migi did get off too late to meet up for dinner after. Mineta didn’t mind though. Buba’s was a bar and restaurant with a bowling alley attached to one side. It was a popular place for high school students to come hang out after class, and Mineta happily ate his burger and drank his beer while watching young girls bounce around and cheer each other on.
Yes. He did so enjoy his life.