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Ayaka walked beside Lumine, the beaten path crunching beneath their shoes. They were supposed to be focused on the sun as it lowered past the horizon, painting the sky an indigo blue. Dark clouds of a similar color floated past, stars began to twinkle in the sky, and she knew behind her that moon was rising, ready to replace the sun for twelve hours.
It was beautiful, of course, but nothing in comparison to Lumine. Her first and best friend–the friend that made Ayaka’s heart flutter, that inspired rushes of eagerness and energy, that with one of those bright, kind smiles made all of her problems melt away, even if it was just temporarily. A strong, adventurous, kind woman who had saved her nation. She was brighter than the sun, and more lovely than the moon. Lumine was everything good in the world.
A sad thought flickered in her mind, dimming the warmth that thinking about her friend had brought. Lumine was leaving for Sumeru soon, continuing her search for her brother.
Ayaka would never stop Lumine. If she ever begged Lumine to stay, to abandon her flesh and blood, then she would never speak to her again. No matter how many times her heart cracked, waiting for Lumine’s radiant presence to seal it. I can’t be selfish, Ayaka reminded herself.
And Lumine wasn’t gone. Not yet, anyway. She was still walking next to Ayaka, her slender fingers intertwined with Ayaka’s gloved fingers. Her gaze was on the sky, her amber eyes reflecting the last snippets of sunlight. Her soft lips were curled up in a faint smile. What would they taste like? Would it taste like the boba they’d drank earlier? Or would it taste like tea-soaked sakura blossoms, sweet and soothing?
Ayaka’s cheeks began to burn with the thoughts and she swatted them away. No one thought about kissing their best friend. It was weird and extremely indecent. And, oh archons, had she been staring at them? She bit back a groan. Maybe Lumine leaving was affecting her more than she originally thought.
“Ayaka,” Lumine said, her voice low and gentle. It was as if her name was a secret between them, and Ayaka’s traitorous heart raced. “Did you have fun today?”
“Yes.” She did, even as the bitterness of her departure slightly tainted the day. Unsurprisingly, Lumine had many friends she had wanted to see, and Ayaka had tagged along, smiling and nodding. She couldn’t wait for them to be alone though, without other people injecting themselves into their conversations. Lumine was her best friend, was it so wrong to want to spend her final day together alone?
It was, Ayaka realized. She couldn’t hog Lumine like some toy. She was a human, and she deserved to visit her other friends. Ayaka doesn’t own her; someone like Lumine couldn’t be bought anyway. She pushed the dark thoughts farther back in her mind. What was wrong with her?
Lumine stopped abruptly, her fingers untangling themselves. Ayaka stopped as well, albeit a little late. Her hand felt cold now, almost lifeless, even with the gloves. She wanted that heat back, that comfort of the traveler’s callused hand pressing against her own.
“Is everything okay, Lumine?” Ayaka asked, concern twisting her gut. Had she done something wrong?
Her amber eyes met Ayaka’s ice-blue, and heat crept up her neck. Why was she staring at her? Was she about to–
“I’m fine, Ayaka. I just…” Lumine sighed. There was tiredness dimming those gorgeous eyes and her bottom lip quivered ever so slightly. She took a deep, unsteady breath before speaking. “Can I vent… to you?”
Ayaka’s heart cracked, and she nearly wrapped Lumine into a tight embrace. Very rarely did Lumine ever expose the sensitive side of her. It was covered up by humor and strength, but now all of that had been peeled away. Lumine was left unfiltered, and she looked defeated, like a warrior who’s lost many battles.
Her feet moved closer to Lumine, bridging the gap between them. “Of course, you can. You don’t ever have to ask that of me, Lumine.”
Lumine nodded and seemingly braced herself as if she could be stricken in the heart at any moment. “I– You know about my brother, right? I… um… He’s with the Abyss. One day, with the help of someone else, I found him. Finally. And I was so happy,” she chuckled, though it was dry, and there was no sincere joy behind it. “But then, he left. He told me: ‘You have to discover this world for yourself’, even after I practically got on my knees and begged him to go home with me.
It’s foolish now, but I really, truly thought he would say ‘Okay. Let’s go.’ We’re twins–we’ve never been this far apart for so long before, and he simply said no.” A tear rolled down her cheek and Ayaka brushed it away with her thumb. Her own brother left her for the Abyss. Her chest tightened, yet Ayaka just continued to listen.
“I know he wants me to discover some big truth about Teyvat. And I’m going to, because that’s what it’s going to take to get back to him, to go home. There’s this ball of fear, though. Just nibbling at me, whispering: ‘What if something happens to him?’ Or if she comes back and actually kills him this time? I just…” Lumine trailed off, tears flowing and words finally failing her. Ayaka pulled her into a hug, and Lumine rested her head on her shoulder. She stroked her back as her best friend sobbed, her heart splintering with every gasp and shudder. Anger wanted to rise up, to take over Ayaka’s body and find whoever she is and kill her. It burned in her chest, clawing at her mind, however, Ayaka simply ignored it.
It wasn’t about her anger. It was about Lumine, the gorgeous, loveable woman breaking down in front of her. Lumine deserved better, and Ayaka vowed to give her better, to give her everything she deserved.
Minutes passed, and Lumine’s sobs finally subsided into the occasional sniffle. She inhaled before speaking. “I’m sorry, Ayaka. I didn’t mean to do that in front of you.” Her eyes trailed to the wet spot on Ayaka’s dress, and they went wide. “Oh, and I stained it. I’m really sorry–”
Boldness surged through Ayaka. “You don’t have to apologize. Don’t ever apologize to me for being honest with me, Lumine.” Her voice was stern, almost like she was reprimanding Lumine. She knew she should stop, but the words kept tumbling out. “You’ve been severely hurt, and I wish I could trade that pain away. I wish I could be enough to where you never have to feel that again. You’re amazing, Lumine. Nothing can prevent you from reaching your goals, and I know you’ll get your brother back and leave this world.” She took Lumine’s hand and squeezed them. Her eyes were glossy with tears and wide with surprise. Her cheeks were flushed pink, and Ayaka couldn’t tell if it was from her crying or not.
“Ayaka…” Lumine whispered.
The boldness drained away, rapidly replaced by embarrassment. Why did she say that? Why did she even say anything? That probably offended Lumine somehow, and she sounded like a complete idiot. This was Lumine’s moment, not hers, and she made it about herself. Why did she have to be so selfish? Why–
Her brain short-circuited as Lumine cupped Ayaka’s face and pressed her lips against Ayaka’s. She stiffened, and she could feel Lumine about to pull away. No. She kissed her back, the milky caramel taste suiting her best friend’s lips so perfectly. It was delicious, like a snack she couldn’t stop eating, and her body relaxed as she continued to kiss her. The humiliation that should’ve come with being so indecent never arrived. Best friends don’t kiss each other on the lips, yet Ayaka couldn’t stop herself, even as she felt the last of the air in her lungs draining.
Lumine broke the kiss, the both of them panting. Her lips were swollen, and her face had grown pinker. There was a bright gleam in her eye, and Lumine smiled. “You kissed me.”
Ayaka nodded before the weight of what she did came crashing down on her like an anvil falling from the sky. She kissed her best friend who was leaving tomorrow. Her face burned, and she prayed it wasn’t completely red. Her hands covered her face. “I’m sorry! I– I don’t know what came over me. I should probably go.” Ayaka stepped back, providing more than enough breathing room. She messed up. Lumine wouldn’t want to be her friend anymore. She probably didn’t want to be kissed. Why would she do that? Why was she doing so many horrible things today?
Lumine shook her head, her blonde hair swishing. “No, no! It’s okay, Ayaka. I… I wanted to kiss you. I have, for a while,” she admitted.
Her mental tangent paused. “You’ve wanted to kiss me?” Ayaka asked. That didn’t make sense. Best friends didn’t think about kissing each other. “But we’re friends, Lumine. We don’t do… that.”
“Then why did you kiss me back?” Lumine put her hands on her hip, shooting Ayaka a defiant look. “I don’t see you as just a friend, Ayaka. I’m in love with you.”
“In love with me?” Ayaka dropped her hands, dumbfounded. Lumine was in love with her.
“Yes. And I know you love me too. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have kissed me back, or still look like a tomato in the face.” Lumine grinned teasingly.
“I…” Ayaka opened and closed her mouth. A part of her wanted to defend herself, to say that it was just a moment of idiocy, and it’d never happen again. But, that wasn’t the truth. Ayaka did love Lumine, even if it took her a painfully long time to realize it. “You’re right.”
“Oh, I know.” Lumine hurried back to Ayaka’s side and pressed a light kiss to her cheek. Ayaka’s heart skipped a beat, and Lumine grasped her hand. It instantly warmed up. “Now, let’s finish our walk before dinner. I’m hungry!”
As they continued walking, Ayaka couldn’t help but glance over at Lumine. She seemed even more radiant: walking with a bounce in her step, a smile on her face, and her hand squeezing Ayaka’s. She caused that. She was a source of Lumine’s happiness, and her pride spread through her chest.
She could love Lumine, even when the world would not.