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It’s a bracelet that almost causes Felix to commit murder.
A stupid, ugly, cheap bracelet.
“Do you like it?” Chan asks, lifting his wrist to show Felix the ugliest piece of jewelry he has ever seen in his entire life. “John gave it to me.”
It takes every ounce of self-control that Felix has not to smack Chan in the mouth. He has to remind himself that John is a good friend, a wonderful friend, a good person who was there for Chan before Felix could be. John makes Chan happy, and whoever makes Chan happy, makes him happy too, even if they are a boyfriend stealing whore. “It’s—pretty.”
Chan frowns, lips coming together in a pout. “You don’t like it.”
Felix schools his face into a happy smile, made just a little bit easier by the malibu and pineapple coursing through his veins. “I love it,” he says, glancing around quickly to make sure that no one is paying attention before he wraps his arms around Chan’s shoulders, pulling him closer.
JYP is here. If they get caught being too cozy staff will never let them be alone in a room together ever again, but John is hanging around here somewhere too, and he wants that whore to see him cuddling with his boyfriend. “I’m just wondering where the bracelet I got you went,” he pouts, because Chan has never been immune to a Felix-pout, “you always wear it on that wrist.”
Chan grins, all big and happy, but instead of kissing Felix like he’s supposed to, he draws away, lifting up his right wrist to show off the old bracelet. “I’m still wearing it.”
Anger boils under Felix’s skin. His bracelet—the bracelet he spent weeks humming and awing over, the bracelet that has always been on Chan’s left wrist, has been reduced to the right. He doesn’t know if he should kill Chan first, or John. Probably John, since he sort of needs Chan if he wants to continue world domination as a pop idol.
Chan seems none the wiser to Felix’s anger. “John has to get going soon, so I’m going to go say goodbye. I’ll find you on the dancefloor, okay?” He kisses Felix’s cheek before Felix can protest, leaving him alone in their hidden corner to fume.
John Aquino better count his days. He better pray to whatever god he believes in that Felix doesn’t get his hands on him. All sixty-something of Felix’s Taekwondo medals are going to come in handy if he gets anywhere near John.
He’s being irrational. He knows that he’s being completely irrational, but it doesn’t do anything to stifle the anger and jealously coursing through his body. He’s so used to having Chan’s sole attention on him that when it’s not—when it’s directed at someone who’s smarter and funnier and prettier and more talented and all these other things, he starts to get worried.
He knows that Chan loves him, that Chan would never cheat on him, but that doesn’t stop Felix from getting jealous, from believing that he’s easily replaceable, especially when the evidence is right in front of him. Chan took off the bracelet Felix gifted him to replace it with one from John. If he could replace a bracelet so easily, he could replace Felix too.
Felix helps himself to the bar in an effort to try and calm himself down. The alcohol goes down easy, helped by the mixer. He thinks about doing a couple of shots, but JYP is still hanging around, and Hyunjin and Jeongin already have their hands full trying to keep Changbin and Seungmin from getting too drunk and telling their boss what they really think of him.
Minho and Jisung have already disappeared to the bathroom to make out, which leaves Felix alone to sulk in a corner and down drink after drink until the world starts to tilt a little to the left. He tries tilting his head to the right to make everything go straight, but that only makes his head spin and his stomach do flips. He has to clutch the bench he’s sitting on and count to ten to keep from throwing up all over his shoes.
Their managers are going to kill him. JYP is probably already typing up the hello, this is JYP … note for his upcoming hiatus. He’s going to be sent back to Sydney with his tail between his legs. John is going to replace him in danceracha. Chan is going to buy John that house that he always wanted and become Berry’s new stepdad.
He sobs, ready to mourn the loss of his life and his boyfriend and his step-dog when a shadow appears in front of him, blocking out the dim green lighting that’s been hurting his eyes since they arrived.
It’s probably one of their managers, ready with his passport and a ticket straight back to Australia.
“Baby,” Chan says, on his knees in front of him, head tilted at an awkward angle so he can see Felix’s face under the sweep of his hair. Felix doesn’t even remember leaning forward and stuffing his head between his knees.
“Baby,” Chan says again with a grin, amused at Felix’s misfortune. “You’re drunk.”
“’m not drunk.” As soon as the words leave Felix’s mouth, he knows that he is. “I’m just—” He has to stop talking, immediately overwhelmed with the need to be sick.
Chan frowns, soothing some of the hair clinging to his forehead away from his face. “I’m taking you home now.” He goes to grab Felix around the waist, but Felix pushes him away, sitting up far too quickly. The whole room spins. He almost chokes on his own vomit, but he manages to swallow it down, gasping when the acid burns the back of his throat.
Chan stands up. Despite Felix’s earlier protests, he manages to get an arm under Felix’s armpit, lifting him. “Let me take you to the bathroom.”
Felix wants to push him away. Chan can go find John and take him to the bathroom if he wants to be such a good boyfriend, but even his drunk brain knows that he needs to get to a toilet before he barfs his brains out all over the dancefloor.
He lets Chan take most of his weight and maneuver them across the dancefloor, head down so his hair can cover his face. He knows that they’re being watched, but no one stops them on their way, and Felix is grateful for that because as soon as they’re in a stall he’s on his knees, puking into a dirty toilet bowl.
He hates being sick. It’s in the top five worst things to ever happen to him every time it happens.
Chan holds his hair back from his face and rubs his back until nothing else can come out of Felix’s body. He helps Felix lean against the stall door when Felix collapses away from the toilet, trying to keep him from falling onto the dirty floor. “I’ll be right back, okay? I’m just going to get you some water.”
Felix closes his eyes, listening to Chan leave. His mouth tastes so nasty and the world spins, even with his eyes closed. He doesn’t know how long he sits there alone, but Chan is back quickly with a bottle of water.
“Here,” he says, voice calm and sweet, even though he must be embarrassed by Felix’s behavior. He tilts the water bottle, helping Felix swallow down gulp after gulp. The water feels refreshing, scrubbing away the taste of acid and alcohol on Felix’s tongue.
All Felix wants to do now is close his eyes and take a nap, not caring about how dirty the floor is. There’s a toilet right there if he needs to get sick again, and the tile, despite the stains, is nice and cool.
Chan, of course, won’t let that happen. “You can’t sleep here, babe. Let me take you home.”
Felix blinks his eyes open. Going home with Chan sounds nice, but they’re not going home. They’re going back to a hotel room. A hotel room Chan can take John back to and fuck him in, because John doesn’t get drunk at parties and throw up in the bathroom and embarrass his boyfriend.
Felix starts to cry. It’s dumb. He feels so dumb. But Chan took his bracelet off because he likes John better. John is prettier and smarter and probably can hold his alcohol a lot better too. He’ll probably be a better stepdad to Berry than Felix could ever be.
“Baby,” Chan murmurs, wiping away tears from Felix’s cheeks. “Why are you crying?”
The words tumble out of Felix’s mouth before he can stop himself. “You took your bracelet off because you hate me.”
Chan looks dumbfounded. “What?”
The anger that caused Felix to get drunk at a company party like an idiot comes raging back. He tries to stand up so that he can get away from Chan, but his legs feel like jelly, and any sudden movements makes the whole world spin and his stomach churn. “You—you can take John home since—since you like him so much.”
“Hey, hey,” Chan says, steadying Felix with one hand on his waist and the other on his shoulder, helping Felix sit back down. “Felix, what are you—”
“You took your bracelet off!” Felix is distantly aware that he’s being too loud, but Chan needs to know how hurt he is. “That’s—that’s like taking off your wedding ring so you can go cheat!”
“The bracelet? I’m still wearing—”
“It’s on the wrong wrist, Chris!” Yelling makes him want to be sick again, so Felix lowers his voice and drags his knees up to his chest so he can wrap his arms around his legs. “It’s supposed to be on your left wrist, and you took it off for John’s bracelet.”
“I’m sorry,” Chan says, sounding genuinely sorry. He settles on the floor next to Felix, tentatively putting an arm around his shoulders. Felix lets him pull him close. Even though Chan’s a no good, dirty, lying, cheater, he still gives the best hugs. “I didn’t realize switching the bracelets would hurt your feelings.”
Felix rubs at his eyes, smearing eyeshadow and mascara all over his knuckles. Now he looks even grosser. John probably doesn’t rub his eyes with makeup on. “It hurt my feelings a lot.”
“I’m sorry,” Chan says again, removing his arm from Felix’s shoulder. He takes off both bracelets, stuffing John’s into his pocket. “I should have thought about what it meant to take off the bracelet, even if it was just to put in on my other wrist. I wasn’t thinking about what that meant and how it would make you feel.” He slips Felix’s bracelet back onto his wrist where it belongs. “I don’t mean to dismiss your feelings, babe. But can I please take you home? This tile is pretty gross, and I think you need to get some sleep. We can always talk more when we get you into bed.”
“Maybe you should take John home instead.” Felix doesn’t mean to say it, but he can’t help it. “He doesn’t get drunk at company parties and rub his makeup all over his eyes.”
“No, he doesn’t,” Chan agrees, which makes Felix want to start crying all over again, “but he doesn’t hold my hand on rollercoasters, or rub my feet when they hurt, or tell the hairstylists that they’re being too rough with my hair, but most importantly, I don’t love him.”
“You love me?” Felix sniffles.
Chan giggles, shaking his head in disbelief. “Yes. Yes, I love you. I tell you I love you every day.”
“You’ll love me even when JYP sends me back to Australia?”
Chan frowns, once again wiping tears away from Felix’s eyes. “Why would he send you back to Australia?”
“I’m drunk. You had to carry me to the bathroom before I threw up all over my shoes. He’s going to replace me with John. You’re going to buy John a house and raise Berry with him because he’s prettier than me.”
“Baby,” Chan says, holding Felix’s face between his hands, forcing Felix to look him in the eye, “that’s by far the stupidest fucking thing I’ve ever heard you say, and you said yogurt was a fruit once.”
“I know it’s not a fruit!” Felix starts crying again. He’s not dumb. He just thinks too fast for his mouth to keep up with his brain sometimes. “Why are you being so mean to me?”
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” Chan giggles, leaning forward to kiss Felix on the forehead. “I’m taking you home now because I want to take you home, no one else. Come on, let’s get you up. We can talk more about how much I love you once you’re safe in bed.”
Chan ends up giving him a piggyback ride back to the hotel. Felix closes his eyes as soon as he’s safely on Chan’s back so he doesn’t have to look at anyone when they leave the bathroom. He hears Chan tell someone that he’s taking him home, but he stubbornly refuses to open his eyes to see who it is. Someone slaps him on the butt as they walk past—Minho, most likely—but no one else stops them.
He manages to fall asleep on the short walk home, and only wakes when Chan gently deposits him on the king size bed. “Sunshine,” Chan says as he starts to adeptly strip Felix of his clothes. “Tell me if you’re going to be sick again, okay? I have the trashcan right here for you.”
Felix looks at Chan. It takes a few seconds for the world to stop spinning, Chan’s face slowly coming into focus. He’s looking at Felix so softly, so enamored with him that Felix feels completely and utterly stupid. “Chris,” he whines. “Chris.” He makes grabby hands, wanting Chan next to him. “I’m sorry. I’m being so stupid. I’m sorry.”
Chan quickly shimmies out of his own clothes, crawling up the bed and between Felix’s spread legs. His body feels so good on top of Felix, so warm and strong and protective. He would die before he lets anyone else feel this safe in Chan’s arms.
“You’re not being stupid, Lixie.” Chan smooths the hair away from his face tenderly. “You’re drunk and I hurt your feelings.”
Felix nods. Chan did hurt his feelings. He hurt them a lot. He almost cheated on him with a man named John of all things. He almost let John become Berry’s stepdad. “You really hurt my feelings, Chris.”
“I’m sorry.” Chan kisses the corner of his mouth. “I won’t ever take the bracelet you gave me off again. Will you forgive me?” he pouts, looking like a kicked puppy, which is so unfair because he knows that Felix can’t say no when he pouts.
“I forgive you,” Felix concedes, head not spinning so much anymore. He doesn’t feel like he needs to be sick again, but the need to sleep is starting to kick in.
“Thank you,” Chan grins, kissing his cheek. “I think you should get some sleep now. You’re going to have a killer headache in the morning.”
Sleep sounds good, so good. He lets Chan roll him onto his side and spoon up behind him, one arm thrown over his waist, a leg between his thighs to bring him as close to Chan as possible. He closes his eyes, feeling safe and warm and a little stupid.
“I want you to know,” Chan says as Felix is just about to fall asleep, “I wouldn’t buy a house and raise Berry with anyone but you. If JYP sends you home I’m going too, but he won’t because Changbin was on top of the bar dancing without his shirt on, and Minho and Jisung were definitely attempting to make a baby on the dancefloor. It’s me and you until the end of the world, baby.”
Felix grins, too drunk and too tired to get his mouth to form any words, but he does grab Chan’s arm and brings his wrist to his lips, kissing the bracelet and the skin of Chan’s palm until he can’t keep his eyes open any longer.