Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Pearl was pacing back and forth in the living room as she tried to compose her thoughts. Ever since Lapis came back after Garnet's wedding, she had grown feelings for her. She relished every moment she had spent with her, and those feelings had grown so much that she couldn't keep them to herself anymore. Pearl wanted to be with her more than anything else in this world, but would it even work? Would Lapis take her feelings seriously or just brush them off like a fly landing on her forehead?

"Maybe I can talk to Steven about this," Pearl said to herself. She heard someone coming downstairs only to find Steven stopping on the stairs checking his phone. "Steven!" Pearl shouted joyfully while running to him. "I need your help! I need to talk to you."

"Um... you okay?" Steven asked when he saw how excited Pearl was. Her excitement now turned to nervousness.

"Well, I've been dealing with something for a while now." Pearl started to fidget with her fingers.

"Oh? What is it?" Steven asked curiously.

"It's about Lapis Lazuli..." She started to blush. Even the mere mention of her would cause certain feelings to well up in Pearl.

"Lapis?" Steven asked confused. "What about her?"

"Well... I think I might have fallen in love with her. She's just so beautiful. The way she moves the water gently and gracefully, and how she cares about every living thing on Earth and wants to protect it. I've can't keep these feelings inside any longer! I am in love with Lapis Lazuil!" Pearl confidently stated. She looked at Steven and blushed lightly. "Um...Did I say too much?"

He stared at her and dropped his bag down on the floor. He didn't respond for a few seconds.

"Steven?" Pearl asked nervously. "I should've kept it to myself, I'm sorry-

Before Pearl could finish what she was saying Steven sprinted in her direction and hugged her tightly.

"Steven!" Pearl cried out.

"I knew it!" Stars formed in his pupils. "I'm so happy for you!"

"Thanks, Steven." Pearl let go of him. "Wait... How did you know that I have feelings for her?"

"You're the smartest person I know, Pearl," Steven said smiling. "And if any one of us has feelings for another Crystal Gem, I think we all would know about it." Pearl blushed bright red at Steven's words. If anyone could see them they would know there was no way she hid her feelings well enough.

"Don't worry," Steven smiled. "We'll figure something out."

Pearl nodded and gave him a slight smile as a sign of assurance.

"So, what are we going to do?" Asked Pearl.

"Trust me Pearl, I have the perfect idea, but we're gonna need Garnet and Amethyst for this."

"Okay," said Pearl. He took her by the arm and started to make their run to the warp pad. "Where are we going?!"

"To Little Homeworld," Steven replied.

Pearl was nervous. What if Lapis rejects her, or what if the plan goes wrong? Maybe she could turn back, it's wouldn't be too late! Or maybe Lapis had feelings for Pearl and felt the same as she did. After all, it wouldn't be that hard to see what happens.

Next thing Pearl knew they were now at Little Homeworld snapping her out of her worrying thoughts.

"I hope you're doing the right thing, Steven." Pearl thought to herself.

Chapter Text

Steven and Pearl walked up to Garnet who was teaching Gems how to paint. They were learning how to paint things that made them happy. Steven had no idea what the gems would paint, but he knew it'd look like a rainbow of happiness.

"Garnet," Steven said as he approached her. "We need you for a second."

Garnet looked at him and gave him a thumbs up.

"Alright class, we will resume finishing your wonderful paintings tomorrow. Thanks for coming!" Garnet waved goodbye to the Gems leaving then returned to Steven and Pearl.

"So what's up?" Garnet asked.

"We wanted to come to you for advice," Steven said while Pearl was blushing and putting her hands in her pockets.

"Oh? Anything I can help with?" Garnet smiled. She knew exactly what the problem was, thanks to her future vision.

"Uh yeah… Well, um…" Pearl stammered.

Steven could see Pearl's embarrassment about asking Garnet this, so she gave her a comforting smile.

Pearl felt a bit better now so she took a deep breath before continuing. "I-I am in love with Lapis Lazuli."

"Is that so?" Garnet tilted her head to the side. "Well then, why don't you ask her out already?" Garnet gave Pearl a smile of encouragement.

"But I'm not sure if she feels the same way about me!" Pearl blurted out. She didn't want to tell Garnet that because she was embarrassed by the whole thing. The others didn't know that Pearl was in love with Lapis because she never told anyone.

"Pearl," Garnet put her hands on Pearl's shoulder. "I see a lot of possibilities for you and Lapis together. But that will only happen if you're brave enough to take the chance. Even if she does reject your feelings at least you had the courage to try."

Pearl sighed and nodded.

You are a very strong Gem, Pearl.

Pearl smiled widely and Garnet continued. "And right now you need to be even stronger than normal."

"Thank you, Garnet," Pearl said. It was nice having someone like Garnet around who understood her problems. Garnet always came through when Pearl needed help, and was really good at giving advice.

"Don't worry. You'll do great," Garnet smiled. Then she winked at the young Pearl. Pearl couldn't help but blush.

"Now, how do you feel?" Steven said.

"I think I'm ready to go talk to Lapis," Pearl said as she took a deep breath.

"Alright, let's get going!" Steven said, and they left.

***

Steven and Pearl saw Lapis sitting outside at one of the tables of the Big Donut. Steven looked over at Pearl, who nodded. Pearl walked up to the table where Lapis was sitting.

"Hello, Lapis!" Pearl said nervously. "Mind if we sit here?" Lapis smiled at her and gestured for them to join her. Pearl and Steven sat down across from Lapis.

Pearl took a deep breath. "U-uh… I… um…" Pearl started to fumble her words.

"It's alright," Lapis said calmly. "Just spit it out already."

Steven reached out his hand and grabbed hers. He squeezed her hand reassuringly. Pearl stopped fumbling her words and cleared her throat. She looked into Lapis' eyes, trying to find the courage to say what was on her mind.

"I-I'm in love with you, Lapis!" Pearl blurted out. Lapis was shocked. She didn't expect Pearl to just come right out and say that to her. Pearl took a deep breath and continued.

"Ever since you came back to earth, I've fallen for you. The way you carry yourself, and how you now want to protect the Earth and all the living beings that exist here. How funny and thoughtful you are. You're just so amazing! And I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Lapis Lazuli."

Lapis was speechless. She didn't know what to say. She couldn't believe this was happening.

"P-Pearl… w-what?" Lapis stuttered.

"I love you, Lapis," Pearl repeated. Pearl could see the confusion on Lapis' face, but she kept going. "I love everything about you. Your smile, your attitude, and especially your voice. I want to hear you sing every day. I want to kiss you and hold you in my arms. "

"Pearl," Lapis started. "I... I…"

"I know." Pearl interrupted. "And I understand if you don't feel the same way about me. But I just wanted you to know how I fe-"

"Yes, Pearl," Lapis cut her off. "I feel the same way about you."

Pearl was stunned. Her heart was beating rapidly. She leaned forward and kissed Pearl. She leaned forward and kissed Lapis. Pearl responded immediately, wrapping her arms around Lapis's neck and pulling her closer. Lapis wrapped her own arms around Pearl's waist and pulled her close. They were kissing passionately, their tongues exploring each other's mouths. Lapis could feel Pearl's heartbeat as she pressed her body against hers. It made her feel warm and safe inside.

Pearl broke away from the kiss and looked into Lapis' eyes.

"Thank you, Pearl," Lapis said. "You have no idea how long I've been waiting to hear those words."

"Oh, I think I do now," Pearl replied. "I know I've waited forever to say them to you." Pearl planted many kisses on Lapis's cheek which made her giggle.

"Pearl stop!" Lapis said laughing. "You're embarrassing me in front of Steven!" Pearl giggled back. Pearl got up and stood next to Lapis. She took Lapis' hands in hers and looked her in the eyes again.

"Lapis Lazuli," Pearl said softly. "Would you like to go on a date with me?"

Lapis smiled and nodded. Pearl and Lapis then Looked at Steven. He had a mouth opened with his eyes wide.

"Uh...Steven, you okay? Lapis said. Steven didn't respond for a while.

"Oh, my stars!" Steven ran to Pearl and Lapis giving them a big hug. "This is amazing! I'm so happy for you two." Pearl and Lapis started blushing at each other.

"Thank you, Steven." Lapis let go of Steven. Pearl then pulled Lapis in for one more kiss.

"How about we have a nice dinner by the beach tomorrow," Pearl said while caressing Lapis's cheek.

"Sounds great," Lapis said excitedly.

Pearl and Lapis agreed on a time and place for their first date. Then they parted ways, with Pearl walking towards Steven and Lapis running in the other direction.

"I'll see you later my little raindrop!" Lapis turned around and smiled at her warmly.

"See you later, Pearl!"

"See? Was that bad?" Steven said to Pearl.

Pearl laughed and shook her head. "No Steven, it wasn't bad at all. It was wonderful" She gave Steven a tight hug. "Thank you, Steven, for everything."

"Anytime." Steven hugged her back. "Let's go home now."

***

Steven and Pearl were now home. As they entered the door, Amethyst, Garnet, and Greg were waiting for them.

"Pearl!" Amethyst shouted with joy in her voice. "Did everything go well?" Steven and Pearl smiled at each other.

"Yes, it did," Steven said. "Pearl asked Lapis out on a date and she said yes."

"That's great!" Garnet said. "I'm glad you guys worked it out."

"Thanks, Garnet," Pearl said.

Pearl and Steven started to go upstairs.

"Aww, are you sure you don't want to stay longer?" Amethyst asked.

"Nah, we should get some sleep," Pearl said. "We have an early morning tomorrow."

"Well then, goodnight," Greg said.

"Good night Dad! Good night everyone! Steven said.

Steven and Pearl went upstairs. Both go to their separate rooms.

"Night Pearl!" Steven said. Waving to her.

"Night Steven!" Pearl waved back to him.

Pearl laid down on her bed and fell asleep immediately. Her dreams were filled with Lapis singing beautifully to Pearl rocking her gently and Pearl smiling at her. Enjoying every second of it.

Chapter Text

It was now the next day, and Lapis was talking with Peridot. Ever since Pearl confessed to her, nothing has been on her mind but the words "I love you Lapis Lazuli." She felt glad that she had friends to talk about these things to. After she went home last night she told Bismith and Peridot everything. Although, Lapis can't really figure out why she loves Pearl so much.

"How do you feel?" Peridot asked.

"I don't know," Lapis replied. "I felt so many things that day. I haven't been in a romantic relationship ever since..." Lapis started to hold herself. Peridot placed her hand on her shoulder.

"Hey, It's ok," Peridot said in a comforting tone. "She isn't here to hurt you anymore, and you know Pearl isn't like that." She looked up at Peridot and tried to give her a small smile, even though it was unsuccessful.

"I know," She sighed. "But she wasn't just hurting me, I was hurting her too. And even though I've gotten better, I can't put myself through the pain again. I...I can't give her that pain."

Lapis buried her head in her shoulders. She felt scared to pursue the relationship. She loves Pearl to the moon and back, but she doesn't want to give Pearl hell. Just thinking about it made Lapis sick
to her stomach.

Peridot noticed Lapis' behavior and tapped lightly on her shoulder. Lapis looked up at her.

"I'm sorry Peri," Lapis said sadly. She tried to fight back the tears that streamed down, but she couldn't fight back.

"H-Hey Lapis, It's ok," Peridot said. "We don't have to talk about it anymore." Peridot got up from her chair and brought Lapis some tissues.

"No, It's fine," Lapis wiped away her tears. "I think I just need some time to think right now."

"Alright," Peridot said. "Well, if you ever wanna talk I'll be here for you." She started to leave the room when Lapis started to call out to her.

"Hey, Peridot?" Lapis asked.

"Yeah?" Peridot turned around.

"Thanks." Lapis gave a weak smile.

Peridot gave a small smile and left the room. Lapis kept her head buried in her arms. She didn't know what to do. She loves Pearl, but if they got together, she feared it might end horribly. Her mind brought back horrible flashbacks to the times she was with Jasper. She started to shiver. She remembered the boat trip. God, the boat trip, the desperate look on her face when she begged her to fuse. Lapis chaining them both in the sea. The times they fused into Malacite. She couldn't go back to that again. Lapis took a deep breath, she had to tell herself this is the past. She can't change it, but she can heal. She has Peridot, Steven, and the rest of the Crystal Gems, but Lapis feels a piece of her is missing.