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"Hi, dad."
June swung her legs on the edge of the cliff, enjoying the breeze in her hair. It was much longer and she was still getting used to that, and god did it get hot, so she had it up in a ponytail.
Her own planet had been the best candidate when she'd decided on a spot for her dad's proper grave. It was nearby where the house had ended up and right on the edge of this big drop off that overlooked the prettiest winding rivers and soaring, spiky mountains her world had to offer. It's what he would have liked, she thought.
"It's been a little while since I last visited... sorry about that, been busy! Karkat and Dave have been working on the buildings for these schools we're trying out, and with Jade off doing all of the important stuff she's always doing with her super cool space powers, I had to help them out. Didn't ever think I'd be the one offering the muscles for heavy lifting, huh?" June joked as she held up her arm, admiring the muscles she pretended were there. "Dave's aspect is time, which is cool and all, but sometimes not the most helpful for the sorta infrastructure we've been working on for... dang, what, five years? Feels a lot shorter." She looked at the tombstone and smiled. "I guess a lot longer, too."
She flopped down, legs kicking up enough for a summoned breeze to blow her head-over-heels and into a sitting position right beside the well-maintained stone. She fixed her hair- Rose called it her wind-swept look and said it was thematically quite fitting- and she sighed.
"I was a little nervous to come and talk to ya... well. This rock that I decided represents you! Which it does. I don't know if dead people have eyes or whatever but if they do, you might be able to see why." June adjusted her glasses. "If you don't have eyes, my hair is up in a ponytail and I have these cute earrings now! They’re shaped like little cats- Roxy gave them to me. You were all about hygiene and never really gave off... like... toxic-ly masculine vibes, so maybe it would make you happy that I'm shaving every day now? Heh heh, not for the reasons you'd expect, I bet!"
June stared at the grave a moment longer before looking out over the horizon. She was a full and proper god now, one who felt pretty at home in the sky, but jeez if it still wasn't a sight to behold. She'd already told her dad all about that, but this latest thing felt even bigger and that was kinda weird.
"I'm a girl now, dad," she said softly. She knew very well that there wouldn't be a response, but the silence still made tears come to her eyes. She'd had the forethought not to wear any makeup.
"It's kinda sad," she said with a sniffle, "that I don't know what's worse... if you were still here and didn't accept me, or that I'll just never ever know."
The wind howled sadly, no doubt echoing her own feelings.
"It still doesn't feel fair sometimes, y'know? Dave got to give Dirk a big hug, Rose and Roxy are pals, Jade has Jake... I mean, Jane's dad is a little bit like you but it's mostly just looks. It's not like he's you but transplanted into a different universe, he's just... not you. It actually makes it worse, kinda." June pushed her bangs out of her face before they got wet. "Plus he has a daughter! Like, a daughter from the start! Well, I mean, I guess I don't know for a fact that Jane is cis since that's not a normal question and I'm not very close with her, but... but if she's trans too that makes it double worse!"
June thought for a moment and then shoved her hands in the pockets of her pants. "Okay, well that sounds mean, but I just mean that I don't have any idea if you'd be... cool. With me now... but... I think I'm just going to pretend like you are cool with it."
She watched some fireflies dance around below, saw a couple consorts and Dersites wandering around one of the little towns that had cropped up on the different planets.
"I think you would have been, honestly," she said as she wiped her tears away. "You were always so supportive and it isn't like you ever said you hated gay people or anything crazy like that- not that... you..."
Fresh tears came and June didn't fight them very hard. She scooted over to lean against the grave- she saw the purple and green flowers and it made her cry even harder knowing that Rose and Kanaya had been here recently.
"I wish I could've known you when I was an adult, too," June admitted. She hiccupped. "I was a brat sometimes and it really, really sucks that that's all I have to remember you. My friends were always talking about their guardians and strifing and how annoyed they were- okay well Jade didn't really but- but I remember saying the same about you! What the hell! I was so dumb. Sorry about that. I really hope you knew that I loved you even back when I didn't act like it..."
June put her head back and stared up at the sky. She closed her eyes and called up the powers that just felt like they'd always been there and soon the wind swept the fireflies into the sky, billowing the clouds and making the whole planet come alive. She could hear the distant 'oohs' and 'aahs' of the inhabitants at the display but they went quiet as the wind began to play a song. June's fingers moved on her lap like she had a piano there, but that was just muscle memory.
Her dad had loved listening to her play the piano. Even when she was a stunted little dweeb of a kid, allergic to most emotion, she felt seen and loved when he'd sit down and just... listen. Anytime she practiced or played, he'd tell her afterwards that she was getting better at it everyday, to keep at it, that he was proud of her.
"I hope you're still proud of me, dad. I miss you a lot," she whispered, tilting her head back to look at the stone above her. The lullaby continued in the wind. "A lot has changed since you left, but I still love you."
She relaxed against her dad's grave, mindful of the flowers and other little tributes that had been left there. She stared up past the sky, into space and the void and whatever was up there beyond the horrorterrors and she hoped some little piece of him was still out there somewhere. That maybe she'd get to see him again and finally get the closure the kid inside never got.
She must have fallen asleep at some point, because a hand on her shoulder woke her up. She groaned, back stiff from the position, and started patting the ground to find her glasses.
"Jinkies, I've got them right here," Dave said. June snickered and took them, putting them on to see him holding out his hand.
"Zoinks, like, thanks, man," June said in her best Shaggy impression. Dave shook his head but pulled her to her feet anyways.
"Not sure you make a good Shaggy but keep on it, maybe in a hundred years. Not that anybody by then will know what the fuck Scooby Doo is, but for your own personal fulfillment or whatever."
June dusted her butt off. "How'd you know where I was? Thought I'd been sneaky enough so you and your boyfriend wouldn't come make me do more work."
"Okay, well first, not my ‘boyfriend’, that's so human of you to reduce us to, and second..." Dave rubbed the back of his neck, the same guy who hid just a little bit behind humor like he'd always been. "... S'your dad's b-day. Now I'm a pretty fantastic sleuth but I really didn't need those skills to figure out where you might be."
"Heh, guess you're right..." June smiled, eyes on the blue grass below.
"You okay, man? Or, uh, wo-man?"
"Ew, stop it, now who's being reductive?" June said, sticking her tongue out and shoving her friend with a giggle. He held up his hands, smiling a little himself.
"Hey, hey, don't get your god-hood in a knot, just being inclusive and shit."
"You're being a goober and shit," June said. "I'm just teasing. Where's Karkat, though?"
"Inside seeing if Nannasprite’s got any cookies. You know how he is," Dave said with a wave of his hand. "Kinda loud and usually hungry. Also still a little constipated on the whole, like, emotions thing."
"Aww, you two have so much in common," June cooed, and then it was Dave's turn to do the friendly shoving.
"Shut up, for real. You're as bad as Roxy with the hopeless romantic schtick- probably why you like her so much-"
"OH y'know Nannasprite did just make cookies let's go inside and stop talking right now," June said as she took Dave by the shoulders and started shoving him towards the door.
He laughed in earnest, and it was nice to hear him be more open about stuff. In the years since they'd all won he'd really started to drop his 'cool guy' act and be himself- he was still a cool guy, of course, just more genuinely.
"Seriously for real though, you okay?" he asked when June stopped shoving and walked beside him. She could see his red eyes looking over at her from behind his shades.
"I'm seriously, absolutely okay," June said with a smile. "Just filling him in, y'know? Makes me feel a bit better."
Dave leaned over, a hand up as he whispered: "how'd he take the whole 'waman' thing?"
"... I think it turned out okay," June replied. Dave gave her shoulder a pat and a thumbs up before Karkat pulled open the door and started yelling at them about being gay and slow and how he was going to eat all of the fucking cookies and that Rose and Jade were coming soon so they better hurry before the cookies were gone-
June went home and ate some of the controversial cookies- that reminded her of her dad and made her cry- but her friends were quick to cheer her up. Rose and Dave had brought their instruments to play some music and Jade space-magic’d hers up out of thin air. Karkat even gave June her own separate hug and the awkwardness only made it sweeter.
Things had turned out okay. She showed Karkat how to play the My Little Pony theme song on the piano while the others argued about which cartoon characters would best survive a zombie apocalypse, and June knew that things had turned out okay.