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Matt remembered every word she ever said to him that night. If he closed his eyes and thought hard enough, he could actually conjure the vision of her face, looking up at him with the saddest eyes he’d ever seen. Her sigh was bittersweet - full of longing for a thing far beyond her reach.
That thing was him.
It didn’t matter that it had happened well over a decade ago. It didn’t matter that after her rejection, he threw himself into an ill-timed relationship and stuck to it for so much longer than was wise. It didn’t matter that they remained friends - not the best of friends, but friends nonetheless - and they stayed in sporadic contact. It didn’t matter that she’d drawn that line on their relationship, a line she refused to cross.
Because he remembered.
“I’m sorry, darling,” she whispered. Her gaze wasn’t pitying, but rather one full of sincere regret. As she raised a hand to caress his cheek, he let a tear fall. “We’re just in such different stages of our lives. I don’t have room in my life for a relationship right now. Maybe in another time, or another life - maybe even in this one, when we’re older - maybe we could work then. But not now.”
At the time, he’d just nodded in resignation. He accepted her answer, never pushed for more from her, treasured the friendship they had and would continue to have, but he never, ever forgot her.
Every poem he read was about her. Every song he listened to was about her. Even while in a committed relationship with someone else, he would think of her from time to time, never fully allowing the corner of his heart that she’d already taken to heal. It remained steadfastly hers and he knew no one else would ever be able to hold the entirety of his love.
He did try, for a time. Moving on. It simply didn’t work - her words had given him hope. And when she broke up with her long-time boyfriend during the pandemic, he almost pounced on the chance to be closer to her. But he held himself back. He didn’t want to be just a rebound to her.
He wanted everything.
Getting cast in House of the Dragon was a blessing for his career, but it threw a wrench in his plans where she was concerned. Suddenly, his entire calendar was filled, limiting his chances of contacting her.
Then Motor City Comic Con happened, and he found himself facing an entire day of being in her presence. It wouldn’t be enough - he had a flight to catch in the wee hours of the morning, but he resolved to drink coffee the entire day. There was no chance of him missing the opportunity to spend time with Alex, sleep be damned.
Karen, bless her perfect heart, declined Alex’s invitation for a catch-up dinner at her hotel room. Though they never talked about it, Karen suspected for years of his true feelings towards Alex. She never said anything though - a few raised eyebrows at him when he flirted with Alex, a couple of knowing looks thrown his way whenever the topic of conversation shifted to her - but she never verbalised her suspicions.
It was only just before the panel that all three of them were doing that she whispered to him. Alex was mere metres away, performing a mic check.
Karen leaned into him, red tresses tickling his shoulder as she whispered, “Invite her to the Galapagos later. Tell her you’ve been pining away for a decade, hopefully she’ll feel sorry enough for your pathetic arse to say yes.”
He trod on her toes quite purposefully.
During the panel, they talked with the comfort of being reunited with Alex. Karen was particularly excited to see her, as it had been a long time since they last saw each other - Alex was unable to make it to Karen’s wedding in Scotland, something that both women reflected upon during the panel as something they regretted. They spoke very fondly of each other as Matt watched, something akin to longing in his eyes.
Of course, as the subject of their friendship evolved, Alex found an opportune moment to crowbar in the topic of their age difference once again - highlighting the fact that she was two decades older than both Matt and Karen and was therefore old enough to be their mother. Matt pursed his lips slightly as she talked, exchanging a furtive look with Karen as he did.
It was something Alex always did - and it always bothered him because - well, who cared? At the end of it, even sans Matt’s lingering feelings for Alex, they always got on well together. All four of them - Eleven’s original Team Tardis - got on like a house on fire, and he found it quite unnecessary that she brought up their age difference over and over again when it hardly mattered. When they were out together, the four of them as mates, it was glorious and wonderful and the subject of their ages was never at the forefront of their minds.
Karen swiftly moved the topic along, sensing the sudden tension in Matt’s shoulders. Matt bit his lip as the next question from the audience was asked, throwing a look at Alex and catching her eye for a few seconds.
He looked away when he realised that she was examining his expression. Alex was perceptive - quite irritatingly so, sometimes - and she would be able to spot the annoyance in his features without any difficulty whatsoever. He masked his expression as he turned his attention towards the audience once more.
Throughout the day, Matt spied glances at Alex. They were both so incredibly busy, meeting fans, signing autographs and posing for photos that there was hardly enough time to do more than give her a passing glance. He wasn’t able to catch her eye - she seemed just as swamped as he was. This fact quite pleased him. Alex deserved absolutely everything.
He let out a quiet sigh as the last of the fans cleared the hall, giving them a cheery wave and a thumbs up. Alex’s booth had been packed twenty minutes ago, and he rummaged in his pockets for his phone.
His face lit up with a smile when he saw a text from Alex.
Headed back to the hotel to freshen up first. Let me know when you’re done and I’ll order dinner for us! Room 2316.
His fingers moved across the screen quickly, typing out a reply.
Just cleared up, I’ll head to you now! And nonsense, Kingston. I’m paying this time.
Matt looked up from his phone to see a few of the convention staff waiting patiently for him. His ears turned red and he mumbled an apology, but they merely gave him smiles that were just a little too knowing.
He didn’t get another text from Alex all throughout his journey to their hotel, which probably meant that she was taking a quick shower. She would usually protest quite heavily when he offered to pay for anything, even the most innocuous of items - but Matt wasn’t willing to negotiate this time, given what he had planned for the evening.
He stood outside her hotel room, taking in a deep breath and preparing to ring the bell - when the door swung open to reveal Alex standing on the other side.
“Oh darling, I thought it was you,” she smiled and stepped forward, enveloping him in a warm hug.
“What - How did you know?” he asked, having just gotten over his surprise.
He froze when he realised that Alex was wearing nothing but a hotel robe and the accompanying slippers. His lips brushed against her hairline, her curls tickling his cheek, and he relaxed at once, wrapping his arms more firmly around her to give her a tight squeeze.
“Your gait - the rhythm of your footsteps. I heard you coming down the hall,” she said into his shoulder, pulling away from him.
He let her go regretfully, his eyes immediately catching a tantalising amount of cleavage and a hint of a deep green lacy bra she had on. His throat let out an involuntary groan before he even realised what was happening. She looked up at him in surprise before her expression morphed into one of amusement.
“Been a long time?” she asked, half-jokingly. “Was all that rutting on House of the Dragon not enough to keep you sated?”
“Shut up,” he said good-naturedly, turning to shut the door behind him and following her into the room. Her laughter floated into the air, making everything around him glow brighter. “That rutting was just for show.”
“None of that slipped off-camera?” she said innocently, a cheeky smile on her face as she made herself comfortable on the plushy sofa. “Not even with that stunning brunette?”
The giant window behind her shone with twinkling lights down below, and the view was quite magnificent - at least, he was certain it was. It just wasn’t quite as magnificent as Alex.
He shook his head as he settled himself beside her, angling himself so that he faced her properly.
She tilted her head at him, her cheeky smile still in place as she continued to rib him. “Must be a long time for you if you’re reacting to this, darling.”
“I reacted this way to you even when I was quite satisfied, Kingston - it’s just your effect on me,” he said honestly, shrugging slightly.
Her expression changed into one of surprise. She looked genuinely taken aback by his admission and it confused him - surely his attraction to her was as plain as day? He hadn’t exactly hidden it very well. He knew his feelings weren’t known to her, but his attraction was something he never kept under wraps, nor did he ever see any particular need to - the woman was the type of beauty Renaissance painters could only dream of replicating on canvas, and yet she showed such surprise at the prospect of anyone being attracted to her.
The silence stretched between them as Alex seemed to absorb his words. When she looked back at him, it was with a slightly softer, fonder gaze.
“I ordered wine,” she gestured at the table in front of them, where two filled glasses and a bottle sat, waiting. “I didn’t have a chance to order food yet, though.”
“No worries, I’ll get it,” he assured her. It was a mark of how surprised she was by his admission that she didn’t argue like she usually did. “You can buy for us next time.”
She seemed to tug the robe tighter around her, as though she wished it covered more of her skin, and it dawned on Matt that maybe his admission had made her uncomfortable. To him, it was something he always knew - something he’d lived with for over a quarter of his life. It was a fact of life. He couldn’t remember a time when he didn’t find Alex impossibly gorgeous.
“I…” he trailed off, hesitating. He didn’t want to make Alex any more uncomfortable, but he wasn’t sure if he should even ask. “Is there something wrong? Alex?”
“No, of course not,” she answered entirely too quickly, and he frowned at her.
“You’re a horrible liar, Kingston,” he said.
She paused. He counted ten seconds before she spoke again.
“I thought it was all for show,” she said quietly.
“What?” he asked.
“Your flirting, the comments - things you said to fans, or on panels, or when you’d compliment me - it was always around people, so I just - I don’t know, I always just thought it was for show,” she said, in the same quiet tone, her eyes trailing over his figure cautiously.
“What? That can’t be true.”
His frown deepened. Surely he’d conveyed to her - but she was right. It was always during rehearsal, or on set, or at conventions and panels and premieres and screenings. Never in private, never when it was just the two of them - or even when it was the four of them, with Kaz and Arthur in the mix - never.
She was worrying her bottom lip, outrightly clutching at her robe now, and he felt such deep shame and horror. He didn’t quite understand why it wasn’t obvious to her regardless - she must hold his acting abilities in high esteem if she believed he was capable of playing all of that for more than a decade. He realised that somewhere along the way, after Alex’s rejection, he’d concentrated all of his longing for her in such a way that would enable him to explain it away easily should anyone else notice. An unconscious act of self-preservation.
“I was sure you moved on,” she continued hesitantly. She wasn’t shying away from his eyes, and he appreciated that - he wanted to be able to read her face, her expressions and her gaze. “But you haven’t, have you?”
He felt his world closing in on him rapidly. He couldn’t lose Alex - not now. He couldn’t have his relationship with her, even one where they merely regarded themselves as the barest of friends, turn sour. He couldn’t bear it.
“It doesn’t matter,” he said, shaking his head quickly. His throat was closing up but he cleared it roughly and continued, determined not to make clear the way his heart was turning itself inside out. “I - your answer still stands, I know that. I cherish your friendship, Alex, and I wouldn’t do anything that would make you uncomfortable. So none of that matters.”
Her eyes were glassy as she gazed at him. “It does to me,” she whispered.
“Well, it shouldn’t,” said Matt adamantly. “I wouldn’t dream of doing anything, not without your express permission - and I know you don’t see me that way yet, and that’s… just how it is.”
He was about to say it was fine , but it seemed too big a lie to pull off, even in his own head. He sighed and looked straight into her eyes, hoping she could sense his sincerity the way she always seemed to be able to perceive everything else.
“I don’t want to lose your friendship,” he said, as earnestly as he could. “I don’t want this - or anything, in fact - to affect our relationship. I want you in my life, even if it isn’t -” He closed his eyes and sighed again, attempting to find the right words. “I cherish our friendship, Alex, more than I’ve probably let on.”
“I cherish you too,” she said quietly, looking straight back into his eyes. She reached out a hand hesitantly, taking one of his in hers and grasping it tightly. She sniffled a little, wiping her nose with her other hand. “Well, this is awkward, isn’t it?”
“I’m sorry,” he offered apologetically, but she shook her head.
“No, no, I meant - well,” she paused, letting go of his hand to gesture at her robe. “I was actually quite… relieved when Karen said she wasn’t up for a reunion dinner tonight.”
Matt frowned. “What? Why?”
Alex blushed, still clutching at the tie of her robe, and Matt felt the pieces click into place in slow motion.
“I wanted to… seduce you,” she spoke the words quietly, so quietly he almost didn’t hear them.
“What?” he said, utter disbelief dripping from his tone.
She turned even redder, looking down at the plush sofa they’re on. Her fingers itched to find a loose thread on the covers and she pulled at it, clearly nervous and fidgety.
“I thought… if there was the barest chance you were still interested…” she bit her lip. “I wanted it. You.”
Matt’s eyes fell to her cleavage once more and he shut his eyes, shaking his head. He might be in love with her but he couldn’t do this to himself - he couldn’t sleep with her if it didn’t mean anything to her. He wouldn’t survive it. He would become a shell of himself, a man who lived only for her.
He would die from longing and loving, and he wouldn’t ever have her again.
He stood. “I can’t,” he said shortly.
She looked up at him in surprise. “You can’t?”
He shook his head.
“Why not?” she asked. “I thought you just said…”
He looked at her. She was looking up at him, utterly confused, and he was so utterly in love, so completely at her feet even when he was towering over her. He loved her and it was painful. He loved her and it was bliss. It was agonising joy like he’d never known; something he was sure he would never feel for anyone else.
“Because I love you,” he said plainly. She gasped, gaping at him. “Because to me, I would be making love to you and to you, it would be… it would be less. Maybe nothing. And I - I’m not strong enough for that.” He smiled wryly. “I’ve always been weak when it comes to you, Alex.”
She remained silent, simply staring at him with those beautiful eyes. He thought he saw a hint of pity in them. He swallowed, wondering if the cracks in his chest were beyond repair this time.
“I would still like to be your friend,” he said quietly. He cleared his throat, now clogging with emotion, and tried his best to continue as though it didn’t feel as though his heart was being pierced with blunt knives. “I know this changes things, but if you - if you cherish me the way you said you did, then I would love to -”
She frowned to herself and mumbled something indiscernible underneath her breath.
“What?” he asked.
She looked straight into his eyes again and stood from the couch. “Shut up.”
And then she was kissing him. And he was kissing her. And they were kissing each other.
Fireworks exploded beneath his eyelids as she kissed him as though he was the very air she needed to breathe. He kissed her thoroughly, moaning roughly as he tasted her tongue for the first time in a decade. Her hands pulled at his neck, nails digging into his scalp, while his slid up her back and into her hair, grasping at her magnificent curls and holding her close.
They moaned together, their breaths mingling and their lips fusing again and again as they seemed to inhale each other.
It was euphoric, a happiness he never knew before. The mere action of kissing her seemed to breathe life into him. He was vital in a way he’d never been since he fell in love with her - since he accepted his fate of always loving her from afar.
“Alex, Alex, ” he breathed against her lips.
It seemed like several nighttimes had passed before either of them parted. An entirely different world would be greeting them outside the hotel room - a world in which Matt Smith could kiss Alex Kingston.
“Matt,” she whispered back, but she seemed just as reluctant to stop kissing as he was.
Finally, when their lips were red and very slightly swollen, they parted.
“What is this, Alex?” he asked honestly. “Because I can’t… I told you I can’t, if it doesn’t… if you don’t - “
“It’s us, Matt,” she whispered back, tears springing into her eyes. She wiped her thumb across his cheek and he realised that he’d shed tears, too. “It means I want more than friendship from you. I want everything, everything you can give me.”
His knees buckled underneath him at her confession. She followed, landing hard on the sofa while he fell at her feet, exactly where he’d been for the past decade.
“Alex,” he said, tears falling fast now, his breath coming faster. He felt a sob building in his chest and he tried with all his might to fight it, because he needed her to know - “Alex, you are everything. I’ve been giving you everything, even when you didn’t want it, even when you couldn’t see. I love you so fucking much, Alex, I need you to know that.”
She pressed trembling lips to his forehead. “I thought one night with you would be enough. I thought it would be what you wanted, and all those fantasies you had back when you liked me would come true, and I could forget about you.”
“Please don’t. Don’t forget about me, Alex,” he pleaded softly, now unable to fight the sobs building in his body and clinging onto her middle.
“Oh darling,” she sighed, and he could feel her quivering breath on his forehead as she kissed the top of his head. “I could never.”
He held tightly onto her, as if she might disintegrate somehow if he let go; as if his arms were the only thing holding her down, and if he loosened his grip she would merely float away into the abyss.
“We still have much to talk about,” she whispered softly to him after several long minutes of merely holding each other. “You can’t stay, can you?”
He looked up at her, eyes red, and shook his head regretfully. “I have a flight to catch in the morning. Kaz and Arthur planned a surprise for me to the Galapagos Islands for my 40th.”
Alex nodded in understanding, but she was visibly disappointed.
“You could come with us?” he asked hopefully.
“Sorry, Matt,” she said, shaking her head. “When I planned this, I thought you wouldn’t want anything to do with me after. I had my schedule filled until early November.”
He sighed sadly and brought a hand to her cheek, stroking her face gently. “Even if you didn’t want me this way, I’d rather feel bittersweet happiness for you than suffer your absence, Alex.”
She closed her eyes and leant down towards him, their foreheads touching as they gazed into each other’s eyes. Her breaths were still shaky and tears were still falling from his eyes, but his heart felt lighter than ever now that she’d finally accepted it.
“Alex, I love you,” he started softly, his other hand coming up so that he was cradling both her cheeks. “And this won’t change, no matter your answer. But I need to know, because you haven’t said… do you love me?”
His earnest, tender and hopeful gaze melted her from the inside out. She wiped his tears with her own fingers, softly tracing the stubble growing on his chin and tucking his growing hair behind his ears fondly.
“Not yet,” she said honestly, her voice still soft. She could see the disappointment in his eyes, but they quickly lit up again. “But I know I can, with time. Once upon a time, I was right on the edge for you, but there were so many things holding me back… those things have changed now.”
His entire face seemed to radiate light as she looked down at him, still on his knees for her.
“Oh darling,” she said, pulling him up from the floor. He followed willingly, settling on the couch but pulling close so that she was practically on his lap. Her hands reached for his knees and rubbed them over his jeans, wincing sympathetically. “I wasn’t thinking, your knees must be killing you.”
“I didn’t feel it, honest,” he said, taking her hands in his and holding them tightly. He brought her hands to his face and kissed them. “They were the furthest thing from my mind.”
She shifted herself, and he could tell she was trying not to put too much weight on him.
“Stop squirming,” he said, his voice soft but strained. She relaxed on top of him, wondering how she ended up straddling him on the couch of her hotel room. “Let me hold you.”
Her spine straightened again when she felt the tent in his trousers. He chuckled at her expression.
“Did you think it would take more than that to get me going?” he asked, pressing small kisses to her jaw. “Because I’ve been half hard since I saw you in your robe.”
She blushed, her cheeks turning pink in such an adorable way that Matt simply smiled against her skin, utterly enthralled by her.
He pulled away just enough to look into her eyes once more. “I should ask… I read that menopause can affect libido, so I was wondering if there’s anything I can do for you -”
Alex kissed him, her lips sliding urgently over his as she moaned and her hips began to move. He groaned into her mouth, surprised but pleased and slightly confused by her reaction. Their lips smacked against one another noisily, her hands delving deep into his hair and messing it up; his own hands wandered over her body, stroking up past her tiny waist and back down towards her bare thighs, feeling the smooth skin there.
When they pulled away, both entirely breathless and panting against each other, Alex’s eyes were considerably darkened. Matt stared, wide-eyed, as her eyes seemed to study him, an unreadable expression on her face. Her fingers stroked his chin and jaw reverently, as if he was a precious art piece, something to be admired and handled with care.
“Menopause affects every woman differently,” she said softly, and Matt felt it was hard to focus on her words when her lips were moving and so close to him. If he moved just an inch closer, he could - “IVF treatments made my libido practically non-existent - but once I went through menopause, it came back, stronger than ever.”
She smirked and bent her head to mouth at his neck, licking and sucking at a point that made his eyes roll back. His fingertips pressed into the bare flesh of her thighs, brushing up against the hem of her robe, and making her rock her hips more steadily against his.
He groaned heavily against her, his hips moving of their own accord counterpoint to hers. He could hardly even believe this was happening to him - his brain wasn’t working properly, filled with Alex and her lips and her touch and her scent and her taste and oh God , Alex!
Her smirk widened against his collarbone and he realised that he’d moaned aloud. In retaliation, his hands moved over to her backside and squeezed hard, making her squeak against him.
“It still might take longer,” said Alex, her voice lower and sexier and God did it make his pants tighten like never before. She continued speaking as though she wasn’t the sexiest thing he’d ever seen or would ever touch; as though she wasn’t tempting him with her perfect voice and her perfect fucking body and her perfection and everything about her. “For me to be ready for you,” she clarified when he didn’t answer, and honestly his brain was processing her words on a lag, too distracted with pulling the robe up so he could feel her magnificent arse without the fluffy wool covering it. “Think you can take it, darling?”
“Don’t worry about me, sweetheart,” he said, his voice hoarse and gravelly and full of lust. “I’ll make it worth your while.”
They made love for hours and hours. Alex was delighted to discover that Matt was an equal and ardent lover - to him, fucking and making love was one and the same - and oh God , was he good at it. He fucked her to within an inch of her life and she rode him to within an inch of his, and at the end of it all they collapsed in a heap of sweaty limbs and sighs, utterly content.
“I don’t want to leave you,” he whispered to her as they lay back in her hotel bed. Her head was on his chest and he was stroking her arm leisurely, and he couldn’t remember being happier than this. “One night isn’t nearly enough.”
She lifted her head from his chest to look at him. Her hair was wild and he loved the look of her post-shag. She looked satisfied and sated and he wanted to be the one to put that expression on her face for the rest of their lives.
“It isn’t just one night,” she whispered, pressing a soft kiss to his chest. Her hands splayed out against his body possessively and it warmed parts of him he didn’t know still existed; parts of him that had craved exactly this for more than a decade; parts of him he assumed had long frozen to death without Alex. “I meant what I said, Matt. I want everything .”
He blinked, feeling his eyes burn with tears. His voice was clogged with emotion as he replied.
“This feels like a dream,” he said. “I… I’m afraid if I walk out that door and leave then I’ll wake up and -”
She pressed her lips to his again, but this time she kissed him slowly, thoroughly, until their lips were red and swollen once more.
“If I could, I wouldn’t ever let you leave,” she spoke against his mouth, so close to him that their lips brushed against each other. “But we both made commitments we can’t break. You’ve made it this long without me, honey, what’s another week?”
“I only made it this long because I never had you before,” he said seriously. “Now I know what you taste like - what you look like when I’m inside you, how you like to be a little rough - all I’m going to think about for the next week is you, love.”
“Just me?” she teased, and he smiled at her.
“Just you.”
“You never know… maybe you’ll meet some pretty girl in Ecuador and forget all about me in a week,” she smiled teasingly, and he kissed her again.
“That is literally impossible, Kingston,” said Matt adamantly.
“Well, maybe I still need some convincing,” she whispered, her cheeky smile returning.
His eyes moved to the electronic clock, and he let out a regretful sigh. His flight was in three hours - he should be getting ready to leave.
“I need to shower,” he said regretfully, pulling away from her.
She stopped him with a hand on his chest.
“Ever heard of multi-tasking?” she asked, raising an eyebrow at him.
“You,” he said, lifting her with him as he got up from the bed. She laughed and squealed in surprise, legs wrapping around his hips. “Are a minx, you know that?”
His shower was three times longer than usual and he was late for his car, but he put the blame squarely on Alex’s shoulders. He knew they couldn’t risk being seen in the lobby, but Alex was insistent on walking him to the lift. He dragged his luggage behind him, admiring the sight of Alex fresh from the shower, her hair wet and hanging in wavy curtains around her face.
She tilted her head at him, her smile wide but her eyes sad as she looked at him, and he shook his head at her before pressing the button for the lift.
“No, don’t look at me like that.”
“Like what?”
“Like that ,” he gestured towards her face, “I’m hanging on a thin enough thread as it is. If you keep looking at me like that I’ll cancel everything I have for the next three years to stay with you.”
She laughed, and he smiled at her.
“I’ll miss you,” she said softly.
“I’ll miss you,” he whispered back, his hand cupping her face and stroking her skin tenderly. “I’ll see you in a week, love.”
She nodded, her throat closing up. She leant up for a kiss and they managed a sweet, chaste kiss before the elevators dinged in front of them, signalling its arrival.
Matt peered down at her and pressed a quick peck to the corner of her mouth.
“See you,” she finally answered as he got in the lift.
Their eyes never left each other as the lift doors closed.
His fortieth birthday was predictably bittersweet.
His holiday with his long-time mates, including Kaz and Arthur, was rejuvenating and his love for the people with whom he’d been friends with for several decades continued to grow and blossom. There was just that one thing missing that would’ve made everything absolutely perfect .
He spilled his guts to his friends the moment he could. Every one of them could read him like a book, and he knew that they would try their hardest to make the trip memorable for him - he was blessed with friends like that. But they had to know that nothing they did would ever make up for the fact that Alex wasn’t there with them.
Arthur ribbed him continuously for days about Alex, joking about what would happen if Matt ever hurt her. Karen, in an uncharacteristically gentle moment, congratulated him quietly before telling him that she would be on Alex’s side in any argument they might have in the future. His other friends teased him about finally getting his crush, and it was a mark of true friendship between all of them that they didn’t express surprise at the revelation that the object of Matt’s affection for over a decade was the one and only Alex Kingston.
Alex was busy on his birthday. He woke up to a brief text wishing him the best day he could have and promising to call him when she was done for the day. Unfortunately, her call came in the middle of the party that his friends threw him at night. The way his face lit up when he saw her caller ID was a dead giveaway to everyone that Alex was the one calling, and he answered her while his friends hooted and hollered at him, his face bright red as he stepped out into the night.
Their call lasted well over an hour. Arthur and Karen had interrupted briefly to talk to Alex, but otherwise it was just Matt and her, chatting about nothing and everything.
“And what did the birthday boy wish for this year?” she asked.
“I didn’t wish for anything,” he said, shrugging.
“No? Nothing at all?”
“Nah,” he said. “Seemed a bit selfish to keep wishing for things when I’ve got everything I ever wanted. I think I’ll save my wish for next year.”
He wanted so badly to be with Alex but he knew his friends had put in a lot of hard work planning this trip for him - he didn’t want to disappoint them. But his friends were the best people in the universe, and they could tell he was beginning to mope.
So his week-long trip was cut by two days. He didn’t tell Alex anything, hoping to surprise her. He knew that her schedule was cleared the day before, and she was planning to do some gardening.
He landed in London 15 hours later. He knew people were noticing him more often these days because of House of the Dragon , and normally he would be much more accommodating to anyone who wanted pictures with him. But he wanted to get to Alex before she heard that he was in the UK two days earlier than planned - and so he put on a slightly sour expression as he walked briskly through the airport, stopping only momentarily to purchase a bouquet of flowers for Alex.
He was practically bouncing with excitement and delight during the drive to Alex’s. He couldn’t wait to see her again, couldn’t wait to breathe her in and bask in her presence for five whole days. He looked down at the bouquet - it was a mixture of sunflowers and white roses with little green bits that he didn’t know the name of because the shop attendant spoke too fast and he was in a hurry. It was the only bouquet in the shop that wasn’t made up of red roses, which seemed entirely too cliche and ordinary for someone as unconventional as Alex.
He was at her doorstep an hour later, the bouquet held tightly in his fist as his suitcase dragged on behind him. His heart was pounding in his chest and he could already feel such a flurry of emotions just by breathing the same air as Alex. He just wanted to be near her; to feel her presence; to confirm that the past week wasn’t merely a dream, but the start of the rest of his life with her.
His heart was in his throat when he pressed the doorbell, waiting patiently for an answer. Less than a minute later, the door opened to reveal a distracted Alex, wearing an apron and covered in flour.
“That better not be another one of your deliveries, Salome, because I am on the -”
“Hi, love,” he greeted, his voice hoarse.
She gasped, her eyes wide as she froze to take him in fully.
“I came back early for you,” he said softly.
She didn’t reply, merely staring at him as though he was some kind of vision. He waited a few more seconds for a response but when he was met with none, he indicated the flour stains on her clothes and face.
“Didn’t know you did cocaine. Struggled without me, did you?” he joked to ease the tension.
That worked, because Alex let out a breathless laugh and hit him in the shoulder.
“I was making pasta, you idiot,” she said, but there was still some surprise left in her expression. “I wasn’t - I didn’t expect you back until Tuesday.”
He smiled at her. “Me mates knew I was moping without you,” he said softly. “They told me to go home because I was being a downer.”
“Oh, darling,” she sighed, and then her smile was wide and her arms spread in welcome. “Come on then.”
He stepped into her arms, enveloping her into a tight hug that crushed the bouquet of flowers between them. The moment he was holding her a warmth spread across his chest, making his entire body lighter as he sighed in contentment, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.
“God, I’ve missed you,” he whispered against her hair.
She responded by leaning up to capture his lips in a passionate kiss, licking and sucking at each other gently. He dropped everything in his hands, choosing instead to bury them in her hair as he kissed her hungrily, wanting to make up for all the time they missed being apart, wanting to ensure that his tongue would never forget the divine taste of her.
She moaned into his lips, clutching his shirt in one of her small hands while the other gripped tightly at his neck, forcing him down towards her. They kissed as though they never would again, as though this was the last thing they’d ever do, as though they needed to taste each other to survive.
When they pulled away, Alex’s eyes were red and watery. She looked up at him, her gaze so loving and tender, and he felt his heart grow three sizes beneath his ribs. All that love for her, and he couldn’t wait to start showing it.
“Mom, did you say something about a package for - oh!” said Salome, pausing halfway down the stairs when she caught sight of who was at the doorway. “Matty.”
He grinned at her. “Hello poppet.”
Salome’s eyes travelled over them, and he could clearly see that she was computing the way Alex’s hands were around him, and the fallen bouquet of flowers on the floor, and the way his clothes were now covered in flour too.
“Hm,” said Salome, her eyes narrowing at her mother. “I see.”
“I was just about to invite Matt for lunch. Is that okay, Salome?” asked Alex.
Salome paused, now diverting her narrowed eyes towards Matt instead. He distinctly felt that he should be afraid. He hadn’t spoken to Salome in years and years - and she was quite grown now - but even as a child, she was bright and smart and she hardly ever missed the opportunity to throw barbs where she saw fit.
“I suppose,” she relented finally. She traversed the remaining steps down and crossed her arms. “Hi.”
The greeting was short, and Matt exchanged a look with Alex that clearly told her he was both bewildered and terrified. Alex merely pursed her lips together, holding back laughter. She shut the front door behind Matt.
“I’ll be in the kitchen,” she said, ignoring Matt’s pleading eyes. “You two should catch up.”
Matt watched her go, making a mental reminder to punish her for that later. Salome’s footsteps echoed almost menacingly as she walked slowly closer, her eyes catching the suitcase behind him.
“Hm,” she said again. Matt decided that he definitely did not like this new thing of hers. “Brought your suitcase, did you? Bit presumptuous, no?”
“No, this was - I - I was on holiday,” Matt floundered over his words, and he could distinctly hear Alex’s giggle through the hallway. He threw a look in her direction even though he knew she couldn’t see it. “Came straight from the airport to see your mum.”
“Hm,” she repeated, and with her arms still crossed, she slowly made her way over to him. She stood, a little shorter than Alex but with as much confidence as her, and Matt distinctly felt that he was going to have to work hard to curry favour from Salome if he wanted to be with Alex. “Mom told me what happened at Motor City.”
“She did?” asked Matt in disbelief. He couldn’t imagine Alex telling her daughter about the sordid details of their union.
Evidently, neither could Salome. She scrunched her nose in disgust at his implication.
“Not that ,” she said, her voice full of exasperation. She pulled a face so like Alex that Matt couldn’t help but feel amused. She fixed him with her withering gaze once more. “She told me that you told her you love her.”
“She did?” asked Matt, and this time his disbelief was genuine.
“Yeah, she did,” confirmed Salome. “And she believes you. I don’t believe you yet, but I’ll know soon enough. And I’ll take appropriate action as I see fit.”
“You’re… threatening me,” he stated. He was a bit discombobulated by the entire situation - he’d known Salome since she lost her first tooth, and now here she was and - what exactly was happening?
“No, I’m just letting you know that I have a course of action,” she corrected. And then, quite suddenly, she smiled at him. “I’m happy for you. Both of you.”
She stepped forward to hug him, and he reciprocated tentatively.
“But I will hurt you,” she whispered into his ear.
Matt pulled back from Salome. “You’ve really changed, you know that?”