Archive of Our Own

Robin sat looking out over the land. It’s going to happen today. She thought, feeling a deep pit of uneasiness in her. The sun was barely beginning to rise, and Robin was unable to sleep. She was, in all likelihood, going to die today.

I should have faith. She reminded herself. Naga herself said I might live. She sighed. That’s probably a futile hope. She dropped her head in a silent prayer: less for her own well being, that was pretty much out of the question– but more for her husband and children. I hope they have a happy life. I hope Chrom is able to recover from what I’m about to do. She shed a few tears, silently. Chrom was still asleep in their tent, probably convinced that he was going to be the one to land the final blow on Grima.

I’m sorry, Chrom. I can’t let you seal Grima away, not when we have this chance to kill it outright. She looked over toward her tent, where her beloved husband was sleeping. Just the night before, Robin had lied– lied directly to his face, telling him that she would not kill Grima, that she would favor her life over others. Knowing that Grima will never hurt anyone ever again… it means my life is meaningless in comparison.

Robin felt herself beginning to sob. I’m determined to follow this path, so why am I so SCARED? Now, as the last day of her life came hurtling closer and closer to her, she found herself wishing she could have just one more day. Another day to hug little Luci, the baby she’d left back home. Another day to tell future Lucina how proud she was of her. Another day to play chess with Morgan. Another day to spend with Chrom. Dammit. I'm still a coward after all this. I still don't want to die.

I’m going to abandon them all. I’m going to hurt Chrom worse than the bolt of lightning I pushed into his gut. She began crying more freely. The last memory he’s going to have of his wife is going to be me lying to him, then committing suicide right in front of him. The camp was beginning to stir now. Robin was going to have to put on a brave face soon. She sniffed, wiped her eyes, and looked at the sunrise one more time. I’m going to be selfish– I hope he still loves me when all is said and done.

Eight and a Half Months Later

Robin awoke with a scream. She’d had a nightmare that Chrom and her children had abandoned her, and that with no one caring about her, she’d crumbled to dust all over again.

“Robin?! What’s going on? Are you alright?” Chrom sat up next to her. “Is anything hurting? Breathe!” He’d been somewhat clingy in the two weeks since her miraculous return, understandably so– Robin returning had been a surprise to both of them.

“Ch… Chrom…” Robin bent forward in bed, hyperventilating. “I’m sorry! I'm so sorry I abandoned you!” She put her face in her hands and started weeping. “I abandoned you… but please, don’t leave me alone!”

Chrom placed a hand on Robin’s back. He was pretty sure that she was all but asleep, still– she was hardly registering any outside input. “Shhh… Robin, it’s ok. I’ll never leave you. You made it back! You’re back with us now.”

Chrom expected her to calm from this, as she had before when she’d had similar nightmares. Quite unexpectedly, though, she whirled and looked right at him, tears freely running down her face. “I know I came back! That’s what was so scary! I dreamed that the kids left and you… you either got disgusted by my behavior, or got tired of putting up with me, or something… and with no one left to love me, I just… crumbled away again, forever.”

“Robs, that could never happen. No matter what, I could never tire of you, and I could never stop loving you.” Chrom hugged her, reassuringly.

Robin returned the embrace but found herself crying harder. “How do you KNOW? We’ve only been married for four years, and I was just DEAD for most of this last one! I can’t imagine how you’d want to stay with me much longer… I’ve been an unreliable wife at best, and a dagger directly in your heart at worst.” She sniffled.

“Robs, do you know when I first fell in love with you?” Chrom asked, pulling her face up to meet his gaze. “It was moments after I saw your face for the first time. I didn’t know you at all, I didn’t even know your NAME, but the moment I saw your face, my heart leapt. Something beyond understanding told me I had found my true soulmate. It was right. You've never been a dagger in my heart. You've been the sword at my side.”

“But… *hic* but I hurt you, over and over!” Robin sobbed. “I hurt you! I lied to you. I abandoned you! I’ve been a terrible wife and mother!” She looked at Chrom, tears pouring from her eyes. “I lied to your face the night before we fought Grima. I did that, knowing I was going to kill myself in front of you– and I still did it!” She wrapped her arms around him, crying uncontrollably. “I’m sorry, Chrom! I don’t want you to hate me, but it feels like you SHOULD!”

“Robin… my precious little bird.” Chrom held her closer. “I was awake that morning. I saw you sitting there, trying to get your head straight. I knew what you were planning. I was going to try to beat you to the punch, of course, but I know you too well to be fooled.” He kissed her gently.

“You… you did?” Robin said, stunned out of crying.

“I did.” Chrom hugged her again. “I knew from the moment you found out that you could actually kill Grima. You have a light in your eye that sparkles when you have a plan.”

“But… the night before… I said that I wouldn’t…” Robin mumbled quietly.

“I know the only reason you’d lie to me is to protect me, Robs. It’s why you made sure to make love with me the night before, why you suffered alone in silence that morning, why you waited until the very last moment to throw me aside before striking Grima down. You wanted my memories of you to be as good as possible.” Chrom kissed her again. “That’s why I could never leave you. Even when you think you’re being selfish, you’re selfless to a fault.”

Robin teared up again. “Dammit, Chrom… why can’t you be angry with me?” She pounded her fists against his chest lightly. “This would be so much easier if you resented me! Then I'd at least be getting some of what I deserve.”

“I’m sorry, but this is the most I can do:” Chrom took a breath and put on a deeper voice. “You almost left me, Robin. As your commander, I order you to never do anything that reckless again!”

Robin sniffed, wiped her eyes, and chuckled softly, half in relief, half in amusement. “Chastisement received, commander. It won’t happen again.” She cuddled up to him. “Chrom? Can you still put up with me? Even with all my faults? Will you still love me?”

“Always and forever, my sunshine.” Chrom hugged her tight, one arm around her shoulder, the other softly caressing the back of her head. He kissed her and held her until she fell asleep. Like I said to myself that morning: I’ll love you, always and forever, come what may. Through thick and thin, through good and bad. Not having to say goodbye forever was already enough for me.