Chapter Text
"Good job for today, Kageyama."
Chikara smiles gently and pats Tobio's shoulder, the younger man who's still sitting pensively with his legs hanging off the bed.
"You can move your legs up just fine and you don't need a crutch anymore." He continues. "So we can practice bending your knees again next week."
"Yeah." Tobio gives a short answer, his eyes still glued to the deep blue colored knee brace that wrapped around his left knee.
Chikara sighs softly, "I know you must be tired of hearing this, but please, be patient of it. Always take your vitamins and medicine, get lots of rest during your break—"
"Thank you for today, Ennoshita-san."
"—I've called a taxi for you. Don't walk too far yet. When you're not feeling any pain already, you can try to walk to the bus stop by yourself. If you're feeling even better, then you can go to the train station and so on, since there are stairs there and I’m afraid you still can't bend your legs properly that quick. Okay?"
Again, Tobio is in no mood to say anything other than thanking the generous physiotherapist who's responsible for his recovery as well as his senior during school days. After redeeming some medicines at the reception desk, Tobio steps slowly out of the lobby while stuffing both hands in his hoodie pockets.
Overcast skies and drizzling rain towards the end of spring colored his gloomy day. As if mocking him for still wandering here while his teammates are training very hard for the upcoming summer.
To be specific: Summer Olympic Games . Even more specific: his dream since high school, right in front of his eyes and had to collapse instantly just because he was 'pushing himself' too hard.
At least that's what some people said who saw him so exhausted, tried too much as he didn't want to let the opponent's ball land on his arena and instead sacrificed his knee to hit the gym floor very hard.
Instead of being in pain at the time, Tobio felt ashamed of himself. His closest friends said that such things and accidents were unavoidable, but Tobio, felt that he had extraordinary experience and talent. He didn't feel that was normal at all.
And now he has to experience the greatest fear of an athlete that he had never imagined. Got injured.
As if that wasn't enough, his position as the main setter in the Japanese national volleyball team was replaced by one of his seniors who everyone and him admits is indeed much better than him. Tobio doesn't have another chance. His games seemed to just disappear and say goodbye before they even met.
This team would be better off without a king of the court like you.
Painful memories of 10 years ago, when he was so small and didn't know how to control his emotions, leading to the destruction of his own team, haunted him lately. He didn't want to remember. He has evolved so far from that moment and it feels unfair if he is suddenly kicked out to return to those dark times.
Tobio takes a deep breath, wanting to scream in the rain if only he wasn't in a crowd right now. Cabs and cars come and go in front of him, the passengers taking turns getting in and out so quickly.
Tobio also participates, with his face lowered deeply, steps towards the black colored cab with the number plate that Chikara told and at a glance he could see two tall men coming out of the passenger door.
"Ah, you didn't bring your cane?" The man in the blue hat was still looking for something into the taxi they had been sitting in, Tobio waiting impatiently.
"You were in too much of a hurry because the taxi was already in front of our house for minutes, so I forgot to take it."
Tobio's eyebrows, which had always been furrowed lately, lifts up at the familiar unexcited voice, as well as his face which rose to see who had spoken just now. His eyes widened as he found the face of the man who usually wore glasses in his little memories, with blonde hair that seemed longer than the last time he saw it, and with pursed lips whenever he was annoyed or embarrassed by something.
However, Tobio's tongue felt stiff. His mind suddenly goes blank just by looking at him who didn't look back at her at all.
"Sorry, Kei. Here, let me hold you." The first man immediately grabbed the blonde and led him inside the hospital with great care.
Tobio is still rooting to the spot, until the cab's horn interrupted his reverie and he immediately got into the vehicle, with his eyes fixed on the two men who had started to disappear behind the lobby door and his mind imagining a name that had not appeared for a long time.
Tsukishima Kei.
"Four days before the 202x Summer Olympic Games to be held in Rio, Brazil, the Japanese volleyball national team announced a new list of players who will officially join the game after their main setter got injured. According to a representative, Kageyama Tobio, 25 years old, has been in pain during the last two days they did daily practice. During his absence, Miya Atsumu, 26 years old, who has been awarded Japan's best setter award for three years in a row will step up as main setter in his stead-"
beep
Tobio turns off the television in the living room and threw away the remote. His intention to look for entertaining cartoons had disappeared because whatever channel he used always broadcast the same news, especially the sports channel just now. Two whole days Tobio's name and face plastered everywhere, but no news talking about his success in the past months and years.
He feels devastated and broken. This should have been his debut playing overseas with his team, especially when he had some of his schoolmates with him.
"Why..." he sighed several times. "Just why…?"
In four days the Summer Olympic Games will open. There, his friends will fight to win the cup without him. They can do it without him since they got Miya Atsumu, right? Tobio hit his own head imagining his senior's happy face when he found out he was no longer a reserve player.
"Of course he's way above me," he mutters. "But I'm also great. They should know too, right?"
King of the court . ‘Friends’ who had been on his team in the past had called him that, which led to people knowing him as the 'King'. In the past Tobio was very annoyed with this nickname, after a while he also got used to it because he thought of it as 'flattery', even though the person who first called him that meant to mock him because of his selfish play.
A king does have to be 'selfish' for the common good, right? But what if the throne is shifted suddenly?
Tobio suddenly remembers someone who also often called him by that nickname, the same person he had glimpsed at the hospital days ago. The same person he hadn't seen for a long time, either because time didn't bring them together or Tobio refused to meet even to remember him.
Tobio becomes unsure whether the person in the hospital was really Tsukishima Kei just because he didn't wear glasses and had longer hair than when he was in high school. But just hearing his voice, Tobio's memory couldn't help it.
"Ah, here comes the 'king of the court'. Anyway, it's Tsukishima Kei and I don't care if you'll be such a dictator like those said cause I'll play with my own way and you have to bear with it."
"What's with you being so angry, your majesty? Is your nap disturbed?"
"The way you apologize doesn't sound intentional. You don't have to do it at all."
"How many times have I told you? I'm not Hinata, stop forcing me to do as you want!"
"Don't hold back. I know you have done and will continue to do your best."
"Kageyama, I want to see you at the full game."
"That’s true." Tobio mutters. "He moved to Sendai, didn't he?"
He groans loudly, then rubs his face. Never mind, he had enough of remembering his past trauma, why should he be reminded by other unwanted memories?
The sun has positioned itself directly overhead, making anyone who is outside want to immediately take shelter in a building or whatever it is to protect themselves from the scorching rays. His friends must have been in Brazil and playing on the beach while waiting for the arena to open.
Damn, Tobio hates it there.
Tobio tries to stand up, and after he felt his leg was fine, he stepped to the kitchen. His knees weren't as swollen and livid as the first time it happened, it's just that from the lack of movement, he felt his legs a lot stiffer. The problem is even when moving, Tobio also feels pain, that alone made him feels uneasy to go through therapy sessions even though he knows well who the therapist is.
Just as Tobio wanted to warm up the lunch his sister had left behind, his eyes accidentally landed on a rectangular, pastel-colored object lying nicely on the dining table.
Tobio groans, "She left his phone again."
He cradles the smartphone which is smaller than his in his hand, contemplating whether to deliver it to Miwa's cafe which was less than 1 km from the apartment or let it be and enjoy his cold lunch.
But if he think about it again, the weather today is no longer as hot as minutes ago and starting to show a little friendliness towards humans.
Tobio gives up on the situation. He takes his hoodie and put his phone and Miwa's into his pocket. While living in Miwa's apartment, Tobio admits that he really troubles his older sister who is as fussy as their late mother. A little guilt that is in him now makes Tobio go to face the outside world besides hospital after weeks he was injured and locked himself in his room.
"You look like a hobo from a distance as well as up close."
Tobio looks up when Miwa came to his table, she’s placing a glass of blueberry smoothies and a plate of plain donuts for him.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Tobio replies lazily. "You're welcome."
"Are your legs okay? You looked a bit limping."
"I'm bored." Tobio takes a bite of his donut, didn’t really answer his sister’s question. "That's why I want to cool off here first."
"You didn't have any more therapy sessions with Chikara?"
"No. I asked for next week. I'm tired of having lectures all the time."
Miwa chuckles, then returns to her place at the counter. Tobio knows that his sister was very happy to see him outside. Must have been very tired of facing Tobio who's always frowning and bemoaning his fate at home.
Of course Tobio almost thought that leaving the house like this was a good idea, apart from a breath of fresh air, no one recognized him because of his messy appearance because after all, he was also a big star who always kept his appearance.
But Tobio’s wrong. A few minutes later, the Moonlight cafe radio broadcast again the news about him being 'dropped out' from the team due to his injury. Miwa rushes to replace the news with another channel, but it turns out that the television, which seems to be working with the devil, suddenly broadcasts the same news, plus Tobio's face fills the screen.
"Ah, too bad we can't see Kageyama-san." Tobio's sensitive ears heard his name being called by a group of students gathered at the farthest corner of the table. "He said he also wanted to resign from the national team, even his respective team, Adlers."
"Huh?? Are you serious???"
"There are several news portals saying that he's not actually injured, but squabbled with Miya-san over the main setter position."
"But didn't Miya-san really play better and have more experience during high school? Whereas Kageyama-san came from a small school-"
"Hey, how dare you! They're both great setters in their own way! Didn’t you watch Black Jackals vs Adlers tournament??? The way they play is different, but I'm sure the problem is because of the injury."
"Hm, but I still think Miya-san is better."
"No! Definitely Kageyama-san!"
"Ah, if you are already a fan, you will defend it no matter what."
For God's sake, Tobio regretted not carrying his usual airpods anywhere because now his ears will definitely explode. His blood feels to boil when he heard how he compared to ordinary people. He feels like he was being mocked and started to think, could it be that his team also thought that way about him?
In fact, they're not entirely wrong. He did have a fight with his team, more precisely, he fought with his mind, became insensitive to other people's feelings and again caused misunderstandings with his team. Just like the old days, before he joined the school team that changed his life.
Amidst his anger, a tired yet familiar voice interrupted his inner debate.
"Excuse me... Can you tell me where the empty table that has a sofa?"
Is this person joking and on purpose? Obviously that is-
"Right in front of you, can't you see?" Tobio holds his voice not to snap back while looking at the person who seemed to have flicked the boundaries of his anger.
But then, Tobio freezes. His eyes were already scanning the face of the person standing next to him and just asked him about the table. The man he hadn't seen for a long time, hadn't been erased from his memory so he could recognize the silky blonde hair that looks longer than the last time they met even without the black-framed glasses he usually wore.
The same man he saw at the hospital yesterday.
Tsukishima Kei.
"No, sir. That's why I asked," the person replies calmly, smiling cutely which seemed fake and annoying, "Thank you," then tapped the cane he was carrying forward until he found the seat he was looking for.
Wait. It’s really Kei. Tobio is more than 200% sure.
If it's really Kei, why doesn't he recognize Tobio?
The pale face of Kei lookes down and types something on his cellphone, while the other hand was feeding a spoonful of strawberry shortcake to his mouth. Tobio kept watching him from a distance, hoping that Kei would look at him back, but that didn't happen. Then a girl entered the cafe and approached Kei, reaching out her hand for a handshake, but the man didn't do the same accurately and it was almost like greeting the wind until the girl grabbed him in a hurry.
Tobio's eyebrows shot up. Still too surprised. Kei... What happened to him? He looks like the same person and different at the same time, but Tobio didn't dare to conclude that at all.
Kei seems to be fumbling around the table looking for his fork even though his eyes were directed at the object, accidentally made it fall because of his nudged hand and the girl help him get a new one. Likewise with the following things where Kei was asked to read something on the girl's laptop and all he did was listen to the voice of an automatic translator.
Only then Tobio realizes that Kei didn't recognize him.
Kei couldn't see him.
"Your eyes can make holes in people's heads, you know?"
Miwa tells him when Tobio came to the counter asking for another drink. How come? Since Kei came until his meeting with the girl ended and she left earlier, Tobio's eyes were still on him.
"You know him?" Miwa asks. "He's been here so many times, only sits with his clients and never comes alone. I actually didn't expect such a well-to-do-looking man to like something as cute and sweet as strawberry shortcake- Don't look at me like that Tobio! I'm not going to take him away from you, I'm not interested with a boy the same age as my own brother!"
"It's not what you think!" Tobi dodges. "But Nee-chan, you really don't feel anything strange about him?"
"Eh?"
Tobio didn’t finish his words and immediately chase after Kei who left through the rear customer door, as if he already recognized the ins and outs of the cafe. The street wasn't that crowded, but the anxiety of losing that figure began to eat away at Tobio until he forced his legs to walk faster, almost running, which made him gasp for breath.
"TSUKISHIMA!!!" Tobio finally shouts, for a moment he felt nervous because people must be watching him with judgmental eyes right now.
But Kei turns to facing at him, which meant, Tobio wasn't in the wrong person and that was the most important point at the moment.
However, what next? What will Tobio do now as he stopped right in front of Kei, standing at the bus stop while waiting for the public transportation to take him away?
"Tsukishima..." Again, that was all that came out of Tobio's mouth. "It's... Kageyama."
Kei frowns, both surprised and already expecting it, then smiles crookedly. "Oh. So that's you, king. No wonder I felt familiar to the arrogant voice at the cafe earlier."
His two hazy brown eyes didn't point directly at Tobio, nor did they scan from head to toe like people who had just met someone they had not seen for a long time. However, he still looks taller than Tobio. Kei had always been thin and pale to the point that their school volleyball team was worried and kept feeding him nutritious food, but this time, he looked much more fragile than before. From a distance, he looks cute with his thick, wavy blonde hair that fills his forehead and nape, unlike when it was cut short at school, but if you look closely, his hair looks damaged.
It's been seven years. And during that time, Tobio didn't hear from Kei at all. Because he didn't ask and Tadashi, who was Kei's best friend, also lost contact with him.
'Tsukki never leaves any messages.' Tadashi told the story one week after Kei left them during their 3rd year. 'His brother only said he was having trouble, but didn't go into details because Tsukki asked him to keep it secret.'
Or maybe, Tobio didn't want to know and chose to swallow that statement wholeheartedly.
Maybe it's privacy, but why? Why can't Kei be honest and leave them? Why did Kei, who motivated him to be at this point, just leave?
Are you okay? "What's wrong with you?" Damn it Tobio! That's not the right way to ask!
Kei raises an eyebrow, then chuckles, "You're still the same, aren't you, king." Didn't answer Tobio's question. "How about you? What made you end up here? Apart from injuries of course."
Tobio gasps, didn't expect that Kei would know what happened to him. He thought Kei really threw away all about volleyball. Or maybe he knows that information because too much media has reported it.
"You usually don't get tired easily," Kei continues, his tone sounded a little sympathetic. "This is the first time I've heard you panting after running for a while."
He hasn't changed much. There were times when the two of them were just like this and chatted without provoking each other's emotions. In fact, they never fight when it's just the two of them. Talking from heart to heart in outline, conveying their next vision and mission after graduation. In front of their friends, they only argued a bit about technique, the rest was just messing around because Kei found Tobio's reaction of his saltiness is quite amusing.
Until Kei told the rest of the team that he was resigning right after their defeat, Tobio was the first to inflame him. Saying that lately Kei always seems to have no intention and misses his good tosses. Kei replied that he had tried and didn't want to be compared to their ace, whose physical abilities were far above him. At that time, they not only argued, but also beat each other. The quarrel made the relationship between players complicated, as colleagues and friends.
'A lazy person like you really doesn't deserve to stand in any match.'
Maybe Kei really didn't want to go. Tobio made it that way.
He didn’t just lost the match. He lost Kei too.
"Tsukishima." Again, Tobio could only call out his name. He looks down and clenches his fists tightly, not really knowing what to say at this point to make him feel better.
"I'm not accepting any apologies. It still sounds gross when you say it." Kei raises a hand, his expression shows that he knew exactly what was on Tobio's mind. "Obviously I was wrong for not being honest with you. Mental and physical fatigue certainly makes things worse, right? And I don't like to dwell on the past, so it's not a problem anymore. We're still 100 years too early for a serious argument."
Tobio sighs. "Okay." Kei definitely doesn't want to remember anymore.
A bus comes and Tobio had doubts whether Kei would get on there? And seeing Kei being taken over by other people, Tobio had thought about helping him get up or ordering a taxi, but again, he was still speechless.
"Instead of you taking care of me, you better focus on your therapy sessions." Again, Kei seems to read his mind that easy, just like years ago. "Obviously the Olympics isn't your last game, is it?"
"Ennoshita-san, can't I have 5 sessions in one day?"
Chikara sighs heavily at Tobio's nonsensical question. "You neglected your one week of therapy sessions and now you want everything done in 24 hours? That's not how you heal yourself, Kageyama."
Tobio chuckles, then looks away and instead his gaze landed on the calendar on the wall.
"Today is the opening of the Olympics." Tobio lowers his legs and lets them hang over the bed. "There are still 2 more weeks before they finish the entire game and I have to be ready to play with Adlers after that in upcoming matches."
"Yeah, I know that. But you have to think about your condition too. Your knees are still stiff, but at least you don't need a cane anymore, which is good. I suggest not using it for going up and down stairs first, running and jumping much less, and do the light movements that I demonstrated yesterday on a regular basis. And don't forget to take your medicine and vitamins! Just trust the process, okay?"
Chikara pats Tobio's shoulder repeatedly. He's happy to be trusted as the athlete's personal physiotherapist who was also his teammate when they were still on the high school volleyball club, so he knows very well how Tobio's mental state is right now.
"I know you can be more patient. This process will feel very slow but also very important, so while you heal yourself, you can think about your new and safe way of playing."
"Ennoshita-san."
"Yes, Kageyama?"
"How long have you lived in Sendai?"
"Eh? Since I graduated, maybe? Right, I went to college and continued to work here, so maybe it's been over seven years. Why?"
Tobio is silent for a long time, then shakes his head and get off his bed. "It's fine. Thanks for today, Ennoshita-san. Tomorrow I want to take two hours sessions like today!"
"Eh??? Kageyama, I told you to slow down! You need to rest too!"
"I know that. I just can't stand by and wait!" Tobio answers while putting on his jacket. "There's so much I want to do besides figure out a new, safe way to play."
Chikara stares at him for a while and asked, "Kageyama, did you and Tsukishima meet?"
Tobio almost touched the doorknob, then withdrew his hand and turned to Chikara who looked like he wanted to say more but didn't have the heart to say it. This feeling, Tobio could already guess. The people closest to him already know about the latest news on Tsukishima Kei.
Only Tobio, who knows nothing.
After graduating from high school, Tobio didn't completely cut off contact with his friends. He would still answer messages as needed, but to meet, he still couldn't answer because of his busy schedule and Tobio regretted not lowering his ego to just exchange more news with them. Ask about Kei's news more precisely, for example.
In a way, this is the first time he has met his volleyball club friends again, apart from Shoyo who has joined the national team and Chikara here of course.
Ah, thinking about the big opportunity he should have made Tobio furious again.
"Yes." Tobio answers while looking away. "I saw him in the lobby after my previous session."
Chikara's expression softened as he tidied up the utensils on his desk. "I also just met him two months ago, my co-worker is handling his therapy."
"Is he all right?"
"I can't judge it." Chikara shrugs, looking apologetic for not knowing the complete information and Tobio felt that his senior was telling the truth. "You could say, it's like playing volleyball."
"What do you mean?"
"You know, how we play volleyball is to keep the ball on top and not fall on the ground, right? Tsukishima is more or less the same, his conditions are similar to volleyball. Only, it's like a very long rally that seems to have no end, very tiring only to keep his condition stable."
Slowly, memories of Kei at a time when he began to lose his ability to play, fills his mind again.
How could he not notice it? Is he really that greedy king like those people always tell?
Tobio returns to Moonlight, which surprises Miwa because she didn't expect her brother to be back from the therapy session so soon.
"If you keep going out like this, a lot of press might find out where you are and come after you, though I like this better than seeing you being grumpy all day at home." Miwa reminds him while giving Tobio a glass of warm milk. "If my cafe gets crowded because of fangirls who don't come to order drinks and instead ask for your picture, I won't hesitate to kick them out!"
"I know."
"Don't wait for the moon guy, okay?"
Tobio rolls his eyes. "No, I'm just bored if I go straight back to my room."
"Ah, all right."
Tobio props up his chin and looks out the window, just as the oven beeps indicating that the cake was ready and Miwa hurriedly returned to her kitchen. The drizzling rain in the beginning of summer wet the city of Sendai again and the temperature inside the cafe was getting hotter as Tobio's inner debate continued.
It seems impossible. Kei couldn't come by chance again because Miwa said yesterday, he is not a loyal customer and only comes occasionally when there is a meeting with other people. After all, Tobio would never have had the chance to talk privately on purpose, were it not for yesterday's coincidence.
But apparently, nothing is entirely a coincidence.
Because this was the first time Tobio wanted to know who had just opened the front cafe door and it didn't take a second for him to recognize a tall, towering body that came inside half soaked. Miwa greets him, shocked that he got wet because of the rain and told the blonde to sit at the corner table closest to the heater because he looked shivering.
Which is Tobio's table.
Kei didn't know that Tobio was there at first, but maybe he heard the black-haired man's restless movements, so he decided to turn around to find an empty table.
"Just sit here!" Tobio didn't know why he's so spontaneous and even holding Kei's arm who was reaching for another chair.
Kei was surprised, but his tense expression just now replaced with a feeling of relief and a little smile tugged at his lips. He didn't refuse and immediately sat down in front of Tobio, then leaned his cane in a corner.
"Oh, king. I thought you didn't like coming to eat with commoners."
Kei still calls him 'king', a nickname he always uses when they are with the others. Does that man still have a grudge against him?
"Yeah, yeah." Tobio answers carelessly and instead was busy observing Kei who’s currently wiping his wet face with his handkerchief. It’s not that bad, it seems that his clothes were still quite dry, but seeing Kei's annoyed and very tense face, made Tobio think this person must have just had a hard day.
"Where were you going?" Tobio couldn't hold back his curiosity after seeing Kei's outfit which isn't as formal as yesterday when he met the girl, who seemed to be his client.
"Previously I wanted to meet someone who had promised to come on time but in the end always procrastinated and ended up canceling. It seems he's the only one who likes to change plans together after being busy with his activities for so long but keep saying he misses me so much and the only reason for this cancellation is because of the stupid rain."
Kei talks as if they met almost everyday and not separated for 7 years
Deep inside, Tobio admits how much he missed the simple moments where they’re just two of them, casually talking about their day like now. He would rather listen to Kei babbling or judging the people in his stories than just watching him silently hide everything.
Miwa came to bring a plate of strawberry shortcakes for Kei and ended up being rewarded with a glare by Tobio, even though that was actually just his usual expression when he was thinking, especially thinking about what he should do while Kei was with him.
"Sounds like a date." Tobio is half joking but also guessing after Miwa left.
"Well, kinda. What makes you think it's a date?"
The answer didn't sound doubtful at all, Tobio should've laughed at that ridiculous thing, just like before when Kei got lots of love letters and bitter chocolate gifts in his locker on Valentine's Day, but somehow his chest hissed strangely. Doesn't like that statement. And Tobio wasn't happy at all because he wasn't happy with that fact.
"Why? I'm blind doesn't mean I don't need affection." Kei teases him.
"That's not it, idiot." Tobio snorts, not hiding it at all and Kei knew clearly he couldn't hide his feelings. "Then it looks like I really disturbed your current date. Should I leave now or observe you from afar?"
"You can still hear me, right?" Kei spoons the cake into his mouth, such a small mouthful. "The date was already canceled from the start, so let's just say it's off."
"What do you mean?"
"Forget it. I told you the date is off."
"Won't be.”
"What do you mean now?"
"Because there’s me." What did I just say???
Kei freezes for five seconds or more, processing Tobio's words, then chuckles loudly. "What's wrong with you, Kageyama??? Looks like you need to get your brain checked too, maybe there's something in there that's making the nerves in your legs uncooperative."
"Fuck!" Tobio grumbles. "Forget it! I also don't know what I just said!"
But more than his embarrassment now, there was a feeling of relief that was quite strange and hadn't haunted him for a long time when Tobio saw Kei laughing like that. It wasn't a teasing laugh, it was more spontaneous and blushing seen from his cheeks which were slightly reddened by Tobio's words just now.
"Okay then. Do you have any ideas?"
"Huh?"
"You just volunteered for my canceled date partner but have no ideas how you’ll spend the day?"
"...No." Tobio knocks on the table in exasperation. "I told you, I'm not serious either, so if you really don't want to, I can get out of here right now-"
Tobio stops his grumbling when he saw Kei smiled a little, "You haven't even started yet, why are you running away? What makes you think I don't want to? I have only less than 30 minutes before my next schedule and you better not making me regret it, Kageyama.”
Tobio is still silent and the silence was only filled by the sound of spoons clashing against plates, conversations of other customers, relaxation songs played by the speaker, and the sound of rain. He knows he's not good at communicating, but he never felt completely numb to the point where he didn't know what to say even if it was just small talk. For him right now, sitting with Kei without doing anything just made him comfortable and at peace.
"Why haven't you asked yet?" Kei takes another spoonful of cream, his hands were shaking and Tobio wondered if he should turn up the heat because the blonde still looks cold.
For some reason, Tobio kept watching him as if it were a slow-motion film, especially when Kei's expression gradually brightened with the next bites of cake. That's adorable considering Kei always puts on a stern and mean face to anyone.
"You still there, Kageyama?"
Tobio clears his throat, apparently he had ignored Kei for too long.
"What do you want me to ask?"
"Whatever." Kei shrugs. "That's the first thing people do on a date. I still don't want to ask anything because I've heard a lot about you in the news 24/7 unless I want to know some fun facts about you like I usually hear in Oikawa-san's interview sessions."
Hearing the name of a senior he both admired and hated, Tobio snorts and Kei laughs at him. But more than that, of course, there's a lot Tobio still wants to ask but doesn't know how to. Chikara's brief information still intrigued him, but at the same time he didn't want to mention the past for fear of making things awkward.
"How are you?" Tobio finds his voice again, that's all he could say for now since yesterday he messed up a question like that.
Maybe it's just Tobio's feelings. But the drizzling rain there slowly stopped its roar. The clouds returned and made way for the sun to shine brightly as it should. The sky becomes crystal clear.
Kei is no longer grinning and looking tense. He gives him a small, sincere smile. As if he’s waiting to be asked with the simple question.
"Slightly better." He answers, then put a whole strawberry as a last bite into his mouth.
It looks so sweet and warm.
Thirty minutes turned into an hour. Too engrossed in swapping stories - or, just Kei telling whatever he could while Tobio listened and answered a few questions with something stupid.
Diabetes. One word, that was all the information Tobio could hear from Kei. He finally understands what Chikara meant when his senior gave a description of Kei's condition resembling a volleyball. Kei has to constantly follow many strict procedures to keep his glucose stable, even after it damages his eyesight and the occasional nerve, he can't stop for a bit.
Kei only said that one word because when he realized that the cafe was starting to get crowded because it was entering after-work hours, he then hurriedly said goodbye. But Tobio insisted on taking him home by a taxi. Even though he knows that Kei is independent and doesn't really think his disability is a weakness, Tobio still won't have the heart to let him go home alone especially after knowing the truth.
When he got home, Kei allows him to stay for a few moments because that night his older brother would come home a little bit late and he didn't want Tobio to be interrogated. Of course Tobio didn't believe it when Kei said Akiteru was very talkative and intimidating when it came to people related to his little brother.
Seconds before Akiteru's return, Tobio finally is willing to leave Kei after they exchanged emails once again because each of them had replaced a new one since the ‘breakup’ and again Tobio was made to feel like a fool. On the way home, Tobio kept looking at Kei's contact name while imagining how difficult the young man had been through these 7 years.
All Tobio knows is, diabetes has taken the life of his late grandfather, the most important person in his life who’s his everything and grew his love for volleyball.
And now it's happening to Kei.
Tobio clenches his fists and grits his teeth, at this point, he would prefer not knowing the truth forever.
Too busy thinking about these things that Tobio forgot that he still had friends. His phone rang before the morning alarm that he had installed went off, from Yutaro who told him that he and Akira would soon be arriving in Sendai. It was then that Tobio remembered that his two friends had wanted to visit him last week once they had time.
"Visiting what." Tobio grumbles as he walks towards a public gym which isn't far from the hospital he usually has therapy, as well as the location his two friends had chosen for them to meet. "They will still ask me to play in the end." Even so, he still brought his black volleyball shoes and a Mikasa volleyball.
His own legs are already strong enough for him to walk long distances, even though to kneel and squat, Tobio still hesitates to do it. In fact, he can jump already though he has to be careful and use one leg to land. He’s afraid of feeling the same pain every time he tried to move his leg like on the first day the bandages wrapped around his knee, so he wanted to practice the flexibility of his movements first.
While he was deep in thought, his deep blue eyes caught the figure of a blonde man who’s standing still right in front of the gym he was about to go to.
"Tsukishima!"
Kei turned his head, and Tobio rushed over to him. Kei's face looked pale and dazed, making Tobio immediately worried about it. Is he sick again?
"What happened? What are you doing here? Why are you alone?"
"Can you ask one by one?"
"No." Tobio answers firmly, worried for sure. "Where are you going? Or who are you meeting? Let me take-"
"Who knows."
"Huh?"
"I just got back from the hospital." Kei replies, his tone sounded empty as if he really didn't realize he was walking aimlessly. "But for some reason my steps brought me here. I wanted to ask people for directions, but it seems very quiet here."
Suddenly Tobio's tongue tasted sour. Kei couldn’t see and now he’s almost get lost, which is very dangerous. Tobio didn't even know what to think first or what he needed to say to reply to Kei's words.
"You're in front of a public gym." Tobio explains after he manages to calm himself down. Kei rolles his eyes at that fact. "Do you want to go inside first to cool yourself or should I call a taxi for you-"
"Oi, Kageyama!"
Tobio flinches and immediately looks at the two black-haired men the same age as him who are walking towards them. Yutaro looked like he wanted to say further, but his eyes immediately went to Kei and Tobio panicked because he didn't know what to do in a situation like this. Kei just hides his condition from those closest to him, let alone people who have never had anything to do with him.
Indeed, Yutaro and Akira went to the same training camp with Kei twice. Their schools also competed against each other at least twice a year, but that's just it.
"O-oh, Tsukishima???" Yutaro chuckles awkwardly when he recognizes Kei. "Long time no see-" Akira was the first to understand the situation and slapped Yutaro hard on the back until he changed his sentence, "I-I mean, nice to meet you again!"
Great. Tobio is amazed by how Akira and Yutaro quickly act normal just by seeing Kei's state once. Besides, they were currently scanning Kei carefully and had expressions as if they couldn't believe what was in front of their eyes.
Of course they were shocked. Kei was a very feared middle blocker and managed to beat many aces from elite schools that competed with them. So, meeting him again under such completely opposite circumstances, who would have expected that?
"Uhm... It's Kindaichi and Kunimi." Tobio hurriedly explains since Kei still looked confused and seemed to have forgotten the voice that greeted him just now. "You know, Kunimi was the sleepyhead while Kindaichi was the onion head from Seijoh-"
"Hey, Kageyama! I've changed my hairstyle for years!"
"Still looks like an onion bud."
"Kunimi, don't get involved!"
"Ah..." Kei nods and gives a small smile, then raises a hand that wasn't holding the cane. "It turns out you three want to reunite, huh."
Tobio also nodded, but quickly said again because he realized Kei wouldn't be able to see him, "Yes, they should have come to 'visit', instead of challenging me to play volleyball when I’m injured like this."
“You said Ennoshita-san allows you to practice jumping already.” Akira states. “So I thought you’ll be completely fine.”
“Only when I want to!”
"Huh? Why not, Tiredyama?" Kei replies, his tone sounded both serious and surprised. "Back then when you had a nosebleed, you were so insistent on continuing to play even though Sugawara-san was much more experienced than you. I didn't know you turned out to be the type of king who becomes this lazy for a small practice."
There was silence for a few seconds, then Yutaro chuckled loudly and Akira was having a hard time holding back his laughter. Either laughing at the satire or the fact that Kei still calls Tobio 'king'. Tobio cast a sharp gaze at his two friends which of course they ignored. The sight of an angry Tobio was their amusement.
"I don't."
Succeed. Kei didn't need pretty words to make the fire inside him burn again. Enough with a small flick on his pride.
"Now." A smile tugged at Kei's lips. "Prove it."
"Huh?"
"I want to watch." Kei turns to Yutaro and Akira. "I hope you don't mind."
"Of course you can!" Yutarou replies quickly. "We'll make sure we beat Kageyama well. Right, Kunimi?"
“Slap his ass if you have to."
"I'm still here, okay?!"
In the end, Tobio didn't have a choice, right?
He helps Kei up the stairs, although at first he was hesitated about whether to hold the blonde's hand or even hug his waist until Kei himself asked to hold Tobio's elbow. Akira didn't talk as much as usual, but was also the one observing their interactions the most.
There were several children using the gym, so they went to the smallest arena and usually used for 2-on-2 primary school practice. Tobio took Kei to sit on the bench, but when they got there they just kept silent until Tobio told them that Kei was still holding his elbow and the taller one immediately released his hand while looking away awkwardly.
However, Tobio was even more awkward. He wasn't too tired when throwing tosses for Akira and Yutaro, they’re always ready to jump for him, of course the few weeks of hiatus didn't immediately make him lose his ability which was already at national level. Even though Kei clearly didn't see him, he really felt like he was being watched and it was more thrilling than when he was practicing at the national youth camp for the first time.
But when he wanted to try being a spiker, he suddenly got scared and couldn't jump high so he missed some of the toss thrown by Akira, so he asked to stop first and return to being a setter like his usual position.
"Nice game, Kageyama." Yutaro compliments him after the nearly thirty minutes they had been playing. "Really, playing with people who are far more pro than me is really fun."
"I forgot that your smash was really good." Akira chimes in, half sneering. He looked the most exhausted of them. "It's Oikawa-san's student afterall."
Tobio grins proudly while wiping his sweat with the towel he brought. It turned out that light training wasn’t so bad and made him even more longing to play in real matches. He then glanced at Kei just to check, the blonde seemed to be contemplating something.
“Are you okay?" Tobio cringed at how soft his tone was just now.
"You hesitating to do something is new to me." Kei answers, then smiles a little. "But when I know you've done well, I feel relieved."
Tobio held his breath. The feeling that had been burning was replaced by flowering. Sometimes there are times when he likes Kei speaks normally without saying sarcasm or anything that triggers his emotions. Like now, he was made unable to hold back his smile.
"You look even more stupid." Akira comments as he watched them the most and was met with a resentful grunt by Tobio.
Immediately Tobio picks up the ball which was lying nicely on the floor and intended to return to the field in order to divert his focus so that his heart would not be pounding too much like now, but then Kei got up from his spot.
"Where are you going?" Tobio asks quickly.
"Go home. You can keep playing." Kei waves his hand, then taps his can aside as he lifts a leg. "I can go to the bus stop myself."
Tobio chuckles disapprovingly. "Says someone who got lost earlier? Let me take you-"
The cane slips out of hand. Kei's body swayed before Tobio finished his sentence.
In a split second, like a repeat of the scene that had happened before, Tobio throws away the volleyball in his hand and swiftly caught Kei who almost fell down right in front of him due to his imperfect footing.
"Tsukishima! You-Are you okay?" Yutaro's panicked voice sounded, but Tobio's focus was only on the body in his arms at the moment.
Tobio couldn't see Kei's face right now, their position makes them look like they were hugging each other. Kei's head was on his shoulder and pinning all his weight on him, but he could tell that Kei was still conscious, especially from his heavy breathing. He could even feel their hearts racing against each other since their chests pressed against each other.
"Tsukishima?" Tobio calls him, tries not to care about his tired legs that were starting to ache.
"Should we call an ambulance?" It was Akira's turn to ask worriedly. "Do you need to lie down first?"
"No." Kei finally answers, although it was very difficult to predict what he was feeling. "Just a moment."
Yutaro and Akira look at each other confused, Tobio gestures with his eyes for them to just obey.
"Take as much time as you want." Tobio says seriously. "I won't let you go."
Bitter.
That's what Tobio felt when he opened his social media account for the first time in a long time. Watching his teammates (former, actually since Tobio was the only one who withdrew from the game), uploaded the pleasures of vacationing at the beach and traveling together after a super tight training during the previous season.
It wasn't THE problem, Tobio had also been on holiday there with his friends. But playing there in the world's biggest league? Tobio even blocked Shoyo's account without a second thought. He knew that the friend who had been with him since high school wouldn't dare to send him a message or he's going to be scolded.
"How unlucky."
Tobio threw his favorite blue and yellow volleyball that he had bounced off the bedroom wall since an hour ago.
Not only that. Kei also hasn't replied to his messages since their meeting at the gym three days ago. Tobio took Kei home by taxi, and even then he still had to carry him to his room because Kei said the tingling had not gone away. But Tobio wasn't sure it was just a tingling sensation.
Luckily Yutaro and Akira didn't ask too many questions. They also immediately returned to Miyagi and Tobio promised to play with them again another time, although they eventually mocked him.
'You're still with him, aren't you?'
Tobio understood what they meant. And he didn't dodge at all.
The other problem is, Tobio doesn't even know what Kei has been doing all this time apart from being a consultant for student final assignments. Kei hasn't come to the cafe since then and it's impossible for Tobio to suddenly come to his house because of threats about 'Akiteru who is actually fierce even though he doesn't believe it'.
"Should I call?" Tobio finds himself. "But what do I want to talk about?"
His only goal was to see Kei again and he didn't care if they had to be quiet for the whole day. Though he knows about the truth, he couldn't even try to ignore Kei even if want to. He just wants to make sure if Kei was doing fine right now.
"Why am I being like this again?"
It was like going back to the days where he saw Kei 'fly high' during their first year in high school. This time Kei didn't even do any volleyball related things but Tobio is already smiling just thinking about it. If Miwa was around now, she would have been rewarded with a pat on the back of the neck for thinking she was crazy.
Maybe for Kei this isn't important. But Tobio really wants to make up for his wasted years of time because of their boy fights.
Just as he was thinking about it, Tobio is awakened by his phone vibrating long enough, a sign that someone was calling. And he swore, for the sake of all his fast attack techniques in volleyball, nothing was faster than Tobio's thumb receiving a call from Kei.
"Yes?" Tobio didn't even bother to hide his excitement.
Kei didn't answer right away, until Tobio thought about greeting him again and made sure that a voice from the other side heard, "You're so loud. I don't even know which one of your messages that I should read first." Very slow and hoarse, like just waking up.
"Where have you been?" Tobio asks, his enthusiasm replaced with worry about Kei after hearing his voice.
"Minding my own business." Kei didn't give the answer he wanted, instead he asked back, "How about your therapy? Have you been able to practice more?"
"A little better. I still struggle to bend my knees quickly, but like I said before maybe I'm just too scared. I should be able to squat by now."
"That's great. I wanted to apologize by forcing you to practice, but you must be enjoying that moment."
"Well, I did. It was a light and fun game, thanks."
More silence. Tobio really wants to know what Kei was doing, thinking, whatever it was, but he doesn't know how to say all of those things without sounding playful when all he needs is a serious answer too. Though he was quite impressed because it was Kei who took the initiative to call him first- or maybe Kei was distracted by his spam messages and his ears were too tired listening to the translation machine.
"How are you?" Maybe that could be the only normal question Tobio could ask, at least for now.
It took a few seconds for Kei to respond, "Yesterday I had an annoying day, but I'm okay now." He likes that question, it always seems to lift up his mood.
Tobio just wants to ask what happened, but Kei quickly adds, "You can come over to my house, by the way. My brother isn't here and will be working overtime for today and- he can be calmer when he knows I'm not alone. You're my only friend who stays in Sendai right now. And here too, there is a volleyball and my backyard is quite large, in case you get bored and want to practice in-"
"Okay."
"Huh? Are you so lonely that you said yes right away?" Kei's laughter sounds broken.
"What do you want now?" Tobio snorted, but he couldn't hold back his smile to accept the offer. "I'm going there."
"Bring some strawberry shortcakes. I want two."
Tobio didn't immediately answer spontaneously as usual. He's rethinking about Kei's condition, of course he couldn't often eat sweets like that. Tobio had wanted to refuse, but maybe Kei was fine like he said. It's just a piece of cake, there won't be any problem.
"I'll be there in an hour."
He actually didn't need that long to get to the Tsukishima residence with a small box of cake. He got into an argument with Miwa after asking for a non-sweetened strawberry shortcake and of course his older sister rewarded him with a smack in the head for that unreasonable request.
Tobio walks slowly when he see Kei's half-open door, maybe it’s purposely like that to make it easier for him to enter so he didn't have to call him again.
This is the first time Tobio has visited Kei's house without any 'important' reason. When they were still in Miyagi, Tobio never came alone. He always went with Shoyo and Tadashi to study together even though in the end he didn't understand any of it and ended up getting scolded for being too stupid. So, coming alone like this made Tobio awkward.
"Tsukishima?"
Tobio calls out as he reached the living room, looking around as he couldn't find the homeowner's silhouette anywhere. Could it be that Kei is sleeping again? He knows that Kei really liked stealing time to take a nap even when they were practicing volleyball, so Tobio wouldn't be surprised anymore.
But when he went to the kitchen, the sight there made him drop his cake box.
Because nothing had prepared him to face Kei lying in pain on the floor, right next to a sprawled wheelchair.