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The thing about Louis is - Louis flirts with everyone. From the pilots to hot passengers of both genders to the barista at the airport coffee shop (Niall just rolls his eyes at him now and hands him his usual latte). It's just what he does, as easily as breathing, and the staff has decided he's harmless (although the almost obscene way he rolls 'Captain Styles' off his tongue makes Harry keep threatening to report him for sexual harassment), and the passengers are usually too charmed to be bothered by it. Because Louis loves life and loves people and he's basically the most enthusiastic flight attendant ever.
He was also pretty intimidating at first. 'Intimidating' meaning Liam was kind of scared to death the first time he worked with him. Because Louis is a bit much most of the time and he never shuts up or stops demanding attention and Liam's not good at being noticed so much or at dealing with the provocative things that usually come out of his mouth.
Liam's life has been pretty quiet up until now (and it still is, really - this job's not as glamourous as people like to think, no matter what Louis believes; it's not really about the job anyway, but his particular outlook on life - Louis' life was probably fabulous even when he was still flipping burgers). He went to university, got a pretty useless degree, had no clue what to do after. He'd pin his decision on two things, really: boredom, and Danielle. Well, breaking up with her anyway. Maybe she'd said it was because the relationship wasn't going anyway but he knows better, knows it's because he wasn't going anywhere, had been stuck in the same rut for years and probably would be for years to come. So, he'd thought about, about what he wanted, what he hadn't had the guts or means to do before. It'd just popped into his head: travel. It was pretty much the most impulsive thing he'd ever done in his life, applying for the job.
And yeah, it's hectic and crazy and takes up most of his life, but he genuinely enjoys it. He's always been good at customer relations (though not as overwhelming as Louis is), doesn't mind living out of suitcases, being in and out of airports and hotels all over Europe, likes seeing the sights whenever he gets a chance. It's good anyway, having a purpose, not being aimless like he's felt for a long time.
He's hardly ever home, usually comes in early in the morning after days away and leaves at night, and that's good for Zayn who likes being alone and shutting himself up in their flat, sleeping all day and working on a new piece all night, getting high and forgetting the outside world. Sometimes he feels like they live in two different time zones (although Liam feels like he lives in all of them at once), like they take turns living in the flat as opposed to sharing it. They talk more through notes (used all the milk! get more!) and texts than in person these days.
Their plane breaks down in Paris, and he sends him a quick message: won't be home until tomorrow night. feed the cat.
He gets his reply a second later: didn't even remember you were coming home.
well i have a real job unlike some people. It's his usual retort to Zayn's comments about his insane hours.
And Zayn's usual response would be: at least i have a life. (He doesn't this time though, says: just make sure you're back before my opening this weekend.)
And it's true, he hasn't had a lot of contact with his friends since he got the job, hasn't had a lot of relationships, hasn't had any at all, really.
But that has less to do with the job itself and everything to do with one particular coworker.
*
If it was one of Harry's flights, they'd all go down to the hotel bar and have as many drinks as they could risk before they had to leave, but Louis suggests they go exploring, and he'd argue but it would sound weak and suspicious.
They end up walking by the river as it's getting dark, and it's weird, that Louis didn't suggest a club or somewhere with lots of people and activity, that Liam's going along with it too, because maybe he doesn't feel comfortable in clubs but at least there'd be a lot of distractions - from this, from Louis, Louis watching him, noticing everything about him like he always does, and being so, so untypically quiet.
Louis stops to look at the water when the sun's gone down completely, and Liam can't help gazing across at him, noting how soft his features look in the moonlight, how his blue eyes go dark, almost mimicking the sky, but how they still have a hint of that twinkle.
His smile isn't cheeky or suggestive, just kind of content, as he looks at him, says, "City of love, huh."
"Didn't know you were so cheesy," Liam says before he can stop himself.
"I'm not, but I mean, if anywhere was to be, this comes pretty close. I remember the first time I came here..." He trails off, but it's not for dramatic effect. He's actually nostalgic, which is pretty weird for Louis.
"I imagine it was a whirlwind romance," Liam says sarcastically.
"No, I came with friends. After college. I think that's when I decided that one place wasn't enough, wasn't big enough."
"To contain you?"
"Maybe." He smiles kind of mischievously now, looking more like the Louis he knows. But then he gets serious again, says, "I thought if it was big enough, if the world felt big enough, everything else wouldn't matter."
Liam's always known there was something deeper to Louis, something to be unearthed and deciphered, and it's always excited him, that unknown part. He's always wanted to know what it was, but at the same time, he wanted the mystery to remain. It's probably the tug-of-war between these two desires that fueled Liam's attraction to him.
He didn't expect this though, that it was such a painful thing. And maybe it wasn't about one specific thing, one specific heartbreak, but just the slow, heavy press of life until you either gave way under it or you escaped.
Louis decided on the latter. And so did Liam.
Things always catch up to you eventually though.
*
When he gets home, Zayn's actually awake and watching telly and the flat's looking cleaner than he'd left it.
"You cleaned," he says, dropping his suitcase.
"Figured since I'm here all the time and have nothing to do, I should make myself useful," he says and it's pretty scathing. And Zayn would actually clean the entire flat to get back at him for his earlier comment. He's ambitious in his vindictiveness.
Liam climbs over his legs that are stubbornly perched on the coffee table and throws himself onto the couch next to him.
He grabs a handful of crisps out of the packet Zayn's holding.
He feels his gaze on him for a second, and his smirk, before he turns back to old Friends reruns.
*
He finds a note stuck to the microwave when he wakes up.
you should invite some of your coworkers to the opening if you want.
He's not sure what he should take from it. Zayn hasn't asked much about his job during the last couple months, only made snide comments about how one day he'd fly away and forget all about their flat and him and the cat. He doesn't know anything about Louis except that he's crazy and handsy and he'd probably get them both fired someday.
He thinks about asking Louis to come, and how it would sound. They've obviously spent a lot of time together, a fair bit of it alone in foreign countries, but it's more because they were thrown together and not out of choice. It's scarier this way, him taking the initiative like this, because he doesn't really know how Louis feels about him. If he considers him just a colleague, or a friend, and he'll find the whole thing too presumptuous and awkward. Maybe he won't though. But even then, it's not that simple, because he doesn't want to potentially jeopardise his working relationship with him either.
He decides he'll ask him, and maybe Harry too, and it won't be a big deal at all.
*
He has a stroke of genius when he stops for coffee before they take off the next day.
"Hey, Niall?"
"Yeah, mate."
"So my flatmate has an opening at a gallery on Saturday. I think he's convinced I have no friends at work, so how about you come and pretend to be my friend? I'll totally pay you for your services."
Niall laughs his distinctive, hearty laugh and says, "Yeah, sure, man. He's an artist? Sounds cool."
"Okay." Liam writes down the address on a napkin and passes it over the counter to him.
"Is Louis going to be there?" Niall asks, and he sounds strangely curious.
"Yeah, probably. I mean, if he decides to come," Liam says casually.
Niall just nods distractedly for a second, then smiles and hands him his coffee with his usual, "Have a safe flight, Liam."
*
He pokes his head into the cockpit to ask Harry and he gets an instant 'yes.' Harry doesn't ask about Louis though, so he's grateful, but then Louis himself is yanking him back into the cabin and asking him in hushed tones, "What was that about?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Are you and Harry having a secret party without me?" He looks mock-offended.
"Yep, and there'll be cake and strippers and everything you love."
"You wound me, Liam Payne," he says, grabbing his chest.
"So are you in?" Liam says, trying not to bite his lip or look too nervous.
"Yeah, totally, I've always wanted to meet the infamous Zayn."
"I knew you were eavesdropping."
"Sue me," he says, shrugging then grinning widely, showing off all his teeth.
*
It's really not what he'd planned. Because Harry's chatting up a hot blonde in a red dress in the corner, totally ignoring the art they were here to see, and Niall's monopolising all of Zayn's attention, listening to him talk about his technique (which he most definitely has no interest in whatsoever) and hanging on to every word (and oh, that's unexpected, but in a pretty good way)...and Louis, well, Louis's drinking a lot and staring at him and he's starting to flush under the fluorescent lights in the gallery and it's getting way too hot suddenly -
"We should get some - uh, some air."
"Okay," Louis says, a cheerful drunk apparently. Which is altogether unsurprising.
They end up on the steps outside the gallery, Louis still clutching a champagne flute and smiling up at the sky pretty giddily.
Liam has to stop himself from smiling too.
"Zayn is nice," Louis says after being quiet for all of five seconds. "I mean, he seemed nice. Nice-looking. Not like - well, like that too. But nice."
"God, you have had a lot to drink if you think Zayn is nice."
"His paintings are amazing too. I mean, just amazing. Like the colour and the lighting and the lines and -"
"What'd you study in school?" Liam asks and it's probably a bad time, the worst time, but Louis doesn't open up much. That time in Paris was a rarity.
He sounds almost sober as he begins speaking. "I bummed around for a while after I did my A-levels. Then I decided to go to drama school. Didn't last long though."
"You dropped out?"
"Yeah, after one semester," he says, grimacing.
And then he did this. Probably uprooted his life, came to Manchester. He probably has an unused flat somewhere too.
Louis doesn't talk about family and friends much, just about cool places he's been, things he's seen.
Liam's becoming just like that.
Everything's temporary. The people you meet and the places you see. Hotels and airports and rooms that look the same with constantly changing views, everything rushing past you, or you rushing past it.
*
Louis ends up on his couch. Zayn had gone off to Niall's place so they're alone.
"I like your place," he says, voice muffled into a cushion, even though he hasn't seen any of it, had just stumbled across the threshold in the dark.
Liam starts walking to his room, but he hears one more thing. "Was this a date?"
He doesn't answer.
*
He finds Louis sitting at his kitchen table the next morning.
"I found this in the fridge," he says, holding up a post-it that says buy milk!
"Oh, sorry, I totally forgot."
"It's okay," he says, smiling at him. It's different from all his usual smile. It's softer, relaxed somehow. Like he's been working something out in his head and it's finally starting to make sense.
They take coffee without milk and Liam can see Louis' hangover starting to disappear (although he seems to be good at hangovers too; it figures).
The brightness in his eyes returns ridiculously quickly.
"Thank God we don't have to work today."
"Yeah," Liam says quietly.
"So, what are we doing instead?"
Louis' enthusiasm is, as always, pretty infectious.
*
They walk around town and Louis drags him into all his favourite shops, and it's different, but good different, to be in a familiar place doing familiar things with him. It kind of feels like a whole new adventure altogether, in this city they both call home but isn't the only one, not anymore.
He's trying on clothes when he says, "So you didn't answer."
"What?"
"Last night," and he sounds impatient through the door. "You didn't say whether it was a date or not."
And oh, right. That.
"It - It was - I don't know. It was whatever you want it to be." Which is a total cop-out and he accepts that.
"Okay..." is all he says before he comes out wearing yet another striped shirt and tight red pants.
"How do I look?"
"Ridiculous."
"Thanks."
"So, what do you want it to be?" he asks, forcing himself to be brave, to look at him, to face it head-on.
"Haven't decided yet." He winks and then disappears back into the changing room.
*
And that's it, really. He pulls him into a half-hug before he leaves him, messes up his hair, tells him he'll see him tomorrow.
When he gets home, Zayn's unpacking groceries.
"You didn't get the milk." He doesn't sound angry though (and with Zayn it's less clear, but Liam knows him too well by now). He's just stating a fact.
"Yeah, I know. Sorry."
"Were you with Louis?"
"Yeah. What happened with you and Niall?"
"Nothing really," he says, finally looking at him. "We went back to his place. He played me a couple songs on his guitar. He's in a band, did you know? We're getting together at a bar they're playing at on Wednesday."
"Cool," Liam says weakly. He feels really guilty for a moment. Guilty about Zayn and not knowing what's up with him most of the time. Guilty he hasn't called back his mum after she left him a message a week ago. Guilty about Louis and how stubborn he's been, how unwilling he's been to show his feelings, to be honest with him. Louis's not the only one with attachment issues.
"You should come if you want. Bring Louis," he says, emphasising the last part.
"I'm sorry," Liam says, abruptly, louder this time.
"What, about the milk?" Zayn asks, looking amused. "You already said that."
"No, I mean, for everything."
"Oh, I..." He looks genuinely surprised.
"I know I've been cutting people out. You especially. I just - It's hard, all of it. And I'm trying to make it all work."
"I know that," Zayn says honestly. "I know you are."
"Okay," Liam says.
They just look at each for a second, and Liam knows that everything's alright between them. It will be.
*
Liam texts Louis about the gig on Wednesday and he just replies with: but what do i wear?
He grins at the phone for a little too long.
*
They have a couple hours in Madrid and they go to the Cibeles.
Liam snaps pictures of both of them in front of the fountain and sends them to Zayn whose jealousy he derives a great amount of pleasure from usually.
"Glad I could do this with you," Louis says when he shows him the message (wish you were here :), the smiley face specifically chosen to elicit rage). And Liam knows he doesn't just mean this, today, but everything, everything they've seen and done together.
Liam just looks at him for a second before he says, simply, "Me too." And he really means it.
Louis smiles.
*
The bar's pretty packed and Louis's in his element, and Liam just keeps looking at him. Every so often Louis will stop talking and give all his attention to Liam and Liam will just nod and smile back at him, like they have a secret.
When Niall's band comes on, the place explodes into noise and then gets really quiet as the first song starts.
Zayn's looking pretty entranced and staring at the stage, at Niall looking effortlessly confident, strumming his guitar and singing, clear and strong into the mic.
"Wow, he's good," Harry says, nodding appreciatively.
Louis seems to come out of a trance of his own, looks at Liam as he says, "Yeah, yeah."
*
The set ends and they all congratulate Niall, Zayn more enthusiastically than the rest. The two of them choose to hang out some more, while Harry disappears off with some girl, and Louis declares he's walking Liam home.
So he does.
They don't say much. When they're outside his building, it happens. He knows it's the moment, it's the time, time to acknowledge that he's decided, and Louis probably has too, what he wants from this, what he wants it to be.
Louis's looking at him more openly than he ever has, asking for something, asking for him to do the same. Asking, Is this okay?
Liam just squeezes his hand for a moment before pulling back, saying, "Goodnight."
His expression falls, but he nods, quickly, and then Liam leaves him there.
*
It's two days before Liam sees him again.
He's quiet again, but it's different, it's the uncomfortable kind, and Liam hates it. He hates everything, hates that he can't just let this happen, he can't just let himself be happy and let it be simple.
"Can I - Can I talk to you?" he asks before he talks himself out of it.
"Yeah, sure," Louis says, looking tired and resigned and everything he should never, ever be.
They walk back down the aisle to the galley.
"I don't -" Liam starts at once. "I don't want you like this."
"Like what?"
"Like - not you. Like your light's gone out." He probably sounds a bit hysterical.
"You - you're the one who rejected me." He looks actually confused.
"I - God, Louis, I didn't mean to. I didn't. It's just - I don't want you to get bored of me. And I don't want to care so much when you do."
Louis just stares at him before letting out a laugh.
"Are you - Do you know how mental you sound right now?"
"Maybe."
"You are the craziest person I have ever met, Liam Payne," but he's looking so fond of him, and his eyes are bright again, and Liam wants to see that all the time, wants to never be away from him.
Louis' hands settle on his neck gently, and Liam nods at him, telling him it's all okay, he wants it, wants this, wants everything.
"I'm never getting bored of you," Louis promises before he brings their lips together. He kisses just like Liam imagined, eager and unrestrained and playful but so sweet. Liam makes a tiny noise of protest when he pulls away.
"I can't wait to sleep with you in every city in Europe," he says and then sighs exaggeratedly.
"You're an idiot," Liam says, but leans in to kiss him again.