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“There’s a line that goes all the way from my childhood to you. Can’t you find a way?”
1989 - 10th birthday.
It’s Kendall’s birthday today. He’s ten.
He’s a big boy now, soon he’ll be a teenager. Roman and Shiv are babies, Connor is practically an old man. But Kendall? He is the perfect age.
His 10th birthday party will be at one of his dad’s parks, which has been closed just for him, so he could have it all to himself. Like a little prince, a future emperor.
Kendall looks around. So far, only his family has arrived. Well, not everyone. Only Kendall, Roman, Shiv (with their respective nannies) and Connor are here. His mom is not here yet, he doesn’t know where she is. His dad is still at the office - he had an important meeting to attend, but he’ll be here soon.
If it weren’t for his dad’s important meetings and hardwork, he wouldn’t have an entire park to celebrate his birthday at. - Kendall thinks and rethinks, and repeats like a mantra this variation of what Logan told him earlier this day, when Kendall got teary-eyed because his dad told him he’d be late for the party.
Logan also called Kendall soft and shook his head in disapproval of him for tearing up, which made Kendall altogether cry as soon as he was alone in his room. But Kendall prefers not to think about that right now. He can’t wait to see his father to be there, to make him proud at how many cool friends from school he has.
Kids are starting to arrive. In practicality, Kendall doesn’t really speak to most of them in school - but they’re here at his awesome birthday party, so this must mean he’s friends with all of them. Even though he’s so shy, he stutters when he tries to speak to them.
But it’s no trouble, because the park is so huge and amazing, that it’s like they can’t even see him when they arrive: they find their own friends and go play. They’re happy and this is all Kendall’s doing. He can’t wait for his dad to arrive, so he can see how many cool friends he has.
Until he sees a little boy running towards him from afar, dragging a tall beautiful woman along with him, by the hand. As the boy gets closer, he realizes: it’s Stewy, his best best friend in the entire world. He doesn’t stutter when he’s talking to Stewy, and when he does, it’s like Stewy doesn’t even mind. He’s cool, and funny and they have inside jokes that make Shiv and Roman jealous.
The woman Stewy is dragging is his mother. Kendall’s met her before but all he really knows about her is what Stewy tells him: that she’s sweet, loving and the prettiest lady in the whole wide world. He also knows she’s a doctor. Not a doctor doctor - Stewy has told him - she’s a doctor in geopolitics, although Kendall is not really sure what that means.
(At dinner the other night, he asked his Dad what it meant, and Logan said it was “bullshit people make up to feel superior to everyone else”).
Stewy finally approaches him and gives him a big, tight bear hug.
“Happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday…” - Stewy chants over and over into the hug. Kendall hugs him back shyly - his dad has told him that he shouldn’t hug boys. He hopes Roman is not around to see this, or else he’ll tell on him.
But he hugs Stewy back anyway, because they’re best friends, and Roman doesn’t have friends so he can’t understand.
Behind them, Stewy’s mom has a warm smile on her face.
“Happy birthday, Kendall. Ten is a great age.” - she says, and he barely nods in response, hiding slightly behind Stewy.
She turns to Kendall’s nanny who’s standing a few feet away from them, making small talk with other women - probably also nannies:
“Hello, are you Caroline?” - Mrs. Hosseini asks Kendall’s nanny. His nanny - Jay - chuckles and shakes her head.
“Mrs. Roy is over there with some of the other moms” - Jay answers, pointing at a big tent far away from them, where Kendall can see his mom and many other adults talking. Kendall is surprised to see that his mom is already there, because she didn’t even approach him to say hello. Which is fine, because Kendall’s not a baby anymore .
Kendall can barely process Mrs. Hosseini’s response because Stewy is already dragging him away by the hand.
“Ken, we need to go on every ride before the day ends.” - Stewy says excitedly. And so they do, they go on a ghost train, the bumper cars, the ferris wheel, and even on four roller coasters that they’re neither tall nor old enough to try, but they still do anyway, because it’s Kendall’s birthday and he owns the park.
After their fourth roller coaster ride, a stranger woman (a party organizer, probably) approaches Kendall and tells him his dad is here, and it’s time to sing happy birthday.
His dad is here. Finally.
He walks with Stewy to the big, long tent set up in the middle of the park. There are several tables underneath it, and one in the middle with a tall birthday cake with a candle that says “10” on top of it.
All the adults in the party are either under or around the tent: family friends, Waystar execs, Kendall’s family members, some of the kids’ parents and the several nannies (distant from the other adults, most of them gathered just outside the tent, under the sun).
He approaches the tent and he’s immediately engulfed in a hug by Connor. His older brother hugs him for a long minute.
“Happy birthday, Kenny” - Connor says, and places a hat on top of his head. Kendall takes it off, and looks at it with a puzzled look. It’s a standart black Chicago Bulls hat.
“Look around it” - Connor says, smiling. Kendall does and he sees a signature.
“I had it signed by Michael Jordan himself” - Connor continues.
Kendall can’t believe his own ears, he can’t believe he now owns a hat signed by Michael Jordan, the coolest person in the entire universe. He jumps on Connor, giving his brother a tight, excited hug.
“He told me to bring you along for a game next time we’re in Chicago, that he’ll love to meet you.” - Connor says, Kendall looks at him wide-eyed.
“Shut UP ” - Kendall says. Connor keeps talking:
“So I bought us some tickets too, for the game next weekend. Dad said you could go”.
Kendall feels like screaming. He’s going to meet THE Michael Jordan. This is the best birthday ever. The best birthday gift he’s ever got.
He hugs Connor again. He doesn’t really know what to say - he’s not very good with words. So he says:
“And no Roman?”
“No Roman. It’s your birthday.” - Connor replies.
“And can I bring my friend Stewy along?” - Kendall asks, excited.
Connor thinks for a bit: “If his parents let him and he brings his own nanny, then yes. I can get another ticket.”
Kendall smiles wide and looks around to share the news with Stewy. Only to notice that Stewy is not around anymore: he’s very far away, talking and laughing with a group of kids from class, like it’s the easiest thing in the world. Kendall will tell him later.
With Connor’s hand on his shoulder, Kendall walks to the tent to greet the adults.
On his way, he can see that everyone he knows is there: his mom and dad, talking with different groups of people. His aunt Marianne and his cousin Greg.
He can count on his fingers the amout of times he’s seen Greg in his entire life, so he doesn’t know him that well. All he knows about cousin Greg is that he is younger than Shiv, taller than Kendall, and stupider than Roman.
He also sees aunt Gerri and her husband uncle Laird. He sees uncle Mo (although he’s supposed to call him uncle Lester, and he’s not sure why, but Roman called him uncle Mo once by accident and he ended up grounded for a week and with a bruise on his arm, because dad was very mad at him).
He sees his absolute favorite uncle Frank. He sees everyone. From his own family to the Waystar family (which, as his father tells him, are the same thing), everyone is there.
(His uncle Ewan isn’t. But he and his siblings aren’t supposed to talk about him or else dad gets angry. So, Kendall prefers not to think about him at all, just to make sure).
As soon as he walks into the tent, he’s immediately showered with love and attention. No one seems to mind that Kendall is maybe too shy and awkward to know how to respond to it all properly, because he loses count of the many hugs, handshakes and praises he receives. He glances at the long, tall pile of presents in the corner. And he feels loved, loved, loved. He feels adored, like a little prince, a future emperor. He’s never felt happier.
Everyone gathers around the birthday cake table. Kendall stands on a stool in the middle. To his left, his mom and Roman. To his right, his dad, Shiv and then Connor.
Kendall feels even more loved when everybody’s attention is only on him, and they’re all singing Happy birthday. He looks around, he spots Stewy - his best friend in the whole wide world - standing next to his mom, singing proudly.
When the song ends, Kendall gets ready to happily blow out his birthday candles.
When, in the blink of an eye, Roman and Shiv at either side of him - in a coordinated attack they must have spent days planning together - surge onto his space and blow out all of the candles before he has the chance to.
He didn’t even get to make a wish. But he also doesn’t make a fuss.
His dad would hate it if he made a fuss. His dad could also get mad and maybe yell at them or even smack Roman in front of everyone, and that would be embarrassing.
So, Kendall feels like tearing up, but he holds it back for later. He feels like making a fuss, but he simply takes a deep breath and gets off the stool. He looks around, and people don’t seem to think it’s a big deal.
He feels silly for caring about some stupid candles.
The party goes on. The adults return to their conversations, some of the kids return to the park rides, other kids sit down at the tables to eat cake and sweets. Kendall looks around, he sees Roman and Shiv laughing and pointing at him while talking to kids who are probably Kendall’s age. He can’t help but wish he’d made a fuss so that Dad would’ve yelled at them - or worse.
He looks away, and spots Stewy eating cake at a table by himself (which is weird, because Stewy is never by himself). Stewy quickly spots him back and waves at him. Kendall walks to Stewy’s table and sits by his side.
“I saved this table for us.” - Stewy says, with a mouthful of cake. Kendall nods. There’s a beat of silence in which Kendall doesn’t really know what to say, because he doesn’t know how to hide that he’s upset about the candles, and he doesn’t feel like bringing it up because it’s silly. Stewy breaks the silence:
“Roman and Shiv are assholes”.
“What?”
“They blew out your candles, Ken. They ruined your birthday wish. We need to get back at them. And it needs to be ugly.”
Oh . “Oh.” - Kendall mutters - “I thought people didn’t notice they did that”.
“Most people didn’t. I did. I’m your best friend, Ken. It’s my job to notice.”
Kendall nods. He smiles - “We’ll think of something.”
As Stewy opens his mouth to probably tell him about a plan he’s already thought of, they see Logan approaching the table. The two of them stand up immediately.
“Hey, dad.” - Kendall says, in a low voice he can’t really control.
“Hello, son.” - Logan replies, ignoring Stewy completely. But Stewy doesn’t seem to notice he’s being ignored, because he straightens his back, puffs out his chest and offers Logan a confident hand.
“Hello, sir. Nice to meet you, sir. My name is Sadegh Hosseini, but you can call me Stewy.” - he says, sounding almost as formal as a grown-up, which Kendall finds funny. Logan almost looks amuzed.
“Well, hello. Are you my son’s friend?” - Logan asks. They’ve never met before, although Stewy has been to their house several times.
“Yes, sir. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” - Stewy replies. He’s still offering his hand, which Logan takes and shakes.
“And aren’t you formal for a child?” - Logan says, amused.
“My dad told me that I should be respectful, sir. Because you’re an important man.” - Stewy replies. Logan laughs at that, in a way that Kendall hasn’t seen him laughing in a while.
“And what does your dad do?”
“He’s a medical doctor. A neurosurgeon.” - Stewy replies. Logan raises his eyebrows and nods, impressed.
“Well, young man, if you’ll excuse us, I would like to say happy birthday to my son.” - Logan says.
“Of course, sir.” - Stewy nods and walks away gracefully.
Kendall is shocked. He definitely didn’t know that Stewy, the 10 year-old who curses like a teenager, could do all that.
Logan puts a hand on Kendall’s shoulder and they walk together.
The first words Logan says to Kendall as they walk are: “You would embarrass me less if you were more extroverted, polite and good with words, son. Like that foreign boy. Your friend. You could be more like him.”
Kendall feels despair. He let his father down.
He feels like tearing up, but he knows his father will call him soft for it. He wants to prove his father wrong and be more extroverted, polite and good with words, but all he manages to do is nod along and mutter quick short words for the rest of the party.
Kendall decides that he hates Stewy Hosseini.
He doesn’t have a birthday candle to blow out, but his 10th birthday wish is that he’ll never ever speak to him again. He decides that Stewy is an asshole and a snake and a horrible friend. Their friendship is over and he’ll avoid him forever.
And then, he’ll learn how to be extroverted, polite and good with words, and his dad will be proud of him.
It sounds like a plan. Kendall’s 10th birthday was a success.
On Monday, Kendall walks into school determined to avoid Stewy as best as he can. He sits far away from him in class, he walks away when he sees Stewy approaching him, he looks down at his feet to pretend he doesn’t see him anywhere.
Until lunch break, when Stewy grabs his arm and drags him to their secret spot - behind a tall wall in the Buckley grounds, far into the school yard. He chooses to walk with him, because he wants to be discreet in his plan to abandon his best friend forever.
Once they’re at their secret spot, Stewy hugs him tight.
“I never got to give you your birthday present” - he says into the hug. Then, he reaches into his pocket and grabs a small yellow box.
“Happy birthday, Ken” - he says, and then hands it to Kendall.
It’s an American Spirit cigarette box. Kendall frowns up at Stewy.
“I hid it in my pocket when I went grocery shopping with Dad, no one noticed.” - Stewy explains.
Kendall decides that Stewy isn’t that bad. He can’t be that bad if he stole Kendall a present. Besides, he doesn’t really hate him, does he? Stewy is his best friend in the whole wide world and Kendall is glad that he didn’t have a candle to blow out when he wished to never speak to him again (because if he did have the candle, then the wish would’ve been… binding. Or something). But he didn’t, so he decides to change his mind.
Kendall breaks his vow of silence:
“You want to smoke them?”
“Well, it’s your birthday, so it’s your call. But I thought it would be cool if we tried together.” - Stewy says with conviction.
“Stew, cigarettes are bad for you.” - he says, with even more conviction.
“Yeah, but every cool guy smokes. Like… in movies and stuff.” - Stewy argues - “Also, my dad smokes and he’s cool, so…”
Kendall thinks for a while. It wouldn’t kill to try them, right? It’s his birthday present from his best friend. Besides, they’ll try them together - if Kendall dies, then so will Stewy, and that’s a little comforting. Also, one third of his new life plan is to become more extroverted, and being cool is maybe part of that. So, he nods.
Stewy and Kendall try their first American Spirits together. They hate it. It tastes bad, it gives both of them a sore throat for the rest of the day, and they have the hardest time trying to get rid of the cigarette breath, because neither of them brought mints to school.
The cigarettes that are left in the box become the protagonists of their plan to get back at Kendall’s siblings for ruining his chance to make a birthday wish. They hide half of the cigarettes in Roman’s room and the other half in Shiv’s - careful to choose spots where they’d look hidden, but a maid would easily find them.
(Something Kendall later regrets, because he doesn’t remember seeing his father that mad at his siblings before in his entire life).
Later that week, Kendall and Stewy meet Michael Jordan together.
Kendall hangs the picture of the two of them with Jordan on his bedroom wall for years. Then, the picture spends a decade or so in his subsequent wallets. At last, it finds its place in the locked drawer where Kendall keeps important things, like his birth certificate, his passport and the COA to a Picasso he once bought while drunk.
They don’t smoke again until they’re 15 - when being cool becomes their number one priority - and that’s when they pick up the habit.
They always stick to American Spirits.