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"Has Hange texted you today?", Moblit asks for what feels like the 1000th time in two short days and if Erwin wasn't worried himself he would make a joke about Mama Moblit but as is Hange is more or less missing, not answering any of their phone calls, not coming to school and neglecting their and Levi's shared workout routine. So yes Erwin is worried and Levi is worried and Moblit is especially worried but the hazel eyed man had to work late once more, so he can't go to his partner and check up on them and Levi is really bad when it comes to any kind of emotions. So after a long tedious day at school, that was only hardened by his worry for his brunette friend, he gathered Levi and Moblit, promising Moblit an update on his partner before the shorter man has to run to work and telling Levi to not wait up on him.
When the blonde pulls up to Hange's house, he finds both their parents cars missing but the house unlocked nonetheless, so enters and loudly announces himself to the empty house, before making his way upstairs.
Hange's room is a mess to put it plain, clothes were thrown on the floor, as were books and a broken mirror, their glasses laid broken next to their closet, he almost steps into a pile of hair on his way. On the bed between empty beer cans and a full ashtray lays Hange on their bed. They look smaller than usual, it's weirdly something the tall man can't describe but they look tiny, like they need someone to help them. They're shirtless, so he see the two binders tightly hugging their chest, he can also hear their shallow breathing and is immediately alert. How long have they been wearing their binder? What if this time they really damaged their ribs? But before he can continue worrying about that his eyes fall onto their left hand, which is bruised and bloodied, his worry wasn't overreaction, if anything he's stupid to have waited two days before checking on his usually bright friend. "Hange?", he asks the figure on the bed and they shoot up glossy eyed, they definitely are high, their hair is chopped of and standing wildly in all directions. "Erwin", their voice is rough, if from smoking or yelling the blonde isn't sure. "We we're worried about you, you haven't been in school for two days and you weren't answering any of our calls or texts" They throw themselves back on the bed "I felt bad", they whisper. " Are you okay with me coming over to you?", Erwin asks and Hange nods, so he makes his way over to them, he sits down next to the brunette and put his hand on their shoulder, they flinch lightly and he immediately removes it but they whisper: "Tis just cold, please stay" So the blonde moves his hand back. "I'm so scared Erwin", they say quietly and he asks them why. "I'm scared that I'll never truly like myself because no matter what I change, I only end up hating myself more" Erwin looks down at then sadly: "I really wish I could show you just how amazing you are hunny. It will get easier, I promise you that, eventually but it's not going to be a light way there but if you put in the work you will finally be able to see just what Moblit and Levi and I see in you" They open their tightly shut eyes and look up at him teary eyed. "I don't want to wait that long Erwin, I'm not patient enough to wait that long" He nods, understanding their frustration but no less worried about their implications. "I know darling, I know. I'm sorry that you have to go through this" He moves his hand up to their destroyed hair and starts rubbing small circles into their scalp. They start crying and he moves closer, holding them as sobs wreck their body. They sit together like this for however long they did, Erwin long forgot about the time. "I'm sorry", Hange says after a while and Erwin shushes them: "Don't apologize, it's alright" Then he asks if he can take a look at their hand and they nod once more, he hurries to the bathroom, gathering a first aid kit and some rubbing alcohol, then comes back, he finds Hange holding a piece of the broken mirror inspecting themselves, when they noticed Erwin they laugh silently: "I fucking obliterated my hair dude, fucking hell, this sucks" Erwin chuckles happy to see them back to their usual self and sits down next to them. "What happened to you hand?" They think for a long while "I genuinely don't know, I was pretty pissed but I probably fucked the mirror up" He nods, they're easing up, he's never been more happy about Hange returning to their usual behavior that in that moment. He patches up their knuckles before turning his attention to their binders. "How long have you been wearing those?", he demands, knowing that the frustration about his friend putting so careless harm to themselves is very evident. "Please don't be mad", they say and then quietly after: "Since Tuesday", it's Thursday, it's been three days, so not only did they ignore the one rule he gave them when gifting them their binders, to never them at once but they also disregarded all and any common sense when it comes to how long they're supposed to wear it. He takes a deep breath collecting himself, then he turns his whole attention back to Hange: "I know it makes you feel better Hange but never, under any circumstances should you bind for more that 8 hours, if you do that might complicate things later in life and make it impossible to get top surgery" their eyes widen at that. "Please Hange, I don't want you to fuck up your ribs or worse your lungs. Can you please change out of your binders I know you feel bad but it's important to take a break" Hange looks down, then at Erwin, then at their own chest and the blonde feels them tense up. He is doing the right thing, he knows that and one day they might remember it and be thankful but right now they're looking at him like he's the scum of this earth and Erwin can't help but feel bad at their absolute horrified, disgusted look. He is doing the right thing: "Go Hange, I'll clean up here and then we can fix your hair", they obey him wordlessly and he pulls out a trash bag from under the brunette's bed and starts filling it with empty beer cans and broken mirror shards, before starting to fold their clothes and putting them back in their closet, they're taking their sweet time and Erwin doesn't mind, he knows that it's hard for them and already feels bad enough taking away the one thing that can comfort them. Eventually the room is clean, all that is left of Hange's breakdown is their broken glasses on their desk and the slightly brighter shade on the wall, where their mirror used to hang. He opes the window, in order to get the smell of smoke out of the room. Hange comes back with their arms crossed across their chest, slouching forwards. "Sit down", Erwin points to the bed and the brunette sits down. He picks up a pair of scissors that he found under the bed and gets to work, trying to fix their hairdo. A mullet, is what Hange ends up with and as they look into the mirror their face brights up slightly. They like it, Erwin breathes out a breath he didn't know he was holding and Hange throws their arm around him: "It looks amazing dude, thank you" He smiles and hugs them from the side before asking if they ate anything at all in the past two days, they look down again and ashamedly shake their head. Erwin is quick to assure them, that they didn't disappoint him and gets up to cook for the both of them. They eat together and eventually sit back down in Hange's now clean room. "Thank you Erwin, for everything, really. I probably would've wallowed in my self pity for the rest of the week if it weren't for you" They returned back to their usual self for the most part, they're cheery and funny but something stays evident nonetheless, that pain he saw earlier still hasn't left their eyes. "Not to worry, can I ask you what triggered you though?" He stays factual and calm, that's the way people know him, that's the way he prefers to be. "It's stupid, I got my ID in the mail and it said female for my gender and I freaked out. I put it in the back of wallet and then started spiraling. It's stupid really" Erwin nods then grins in a way that Hange would: "F for fantastic and nothing else, you idiot" His friend laughs, then hits him: "Stop impersonating me, idiot yourself" They laugh wholeheartedly and Erwin finally relaxes. Because Hange is alright again and that means he can be alright again. He shoots a quick text to Moblit and Levi and then sits with Hange, listening to them rant about something they discovered before their episode started.