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Chapter Text

I. October 2022

In the surrounding sea, waves of beaming colorful lights follow the rhythm and sound that vibrates the whole concert stadium. In the light's absence, an all-encompassing void of pitch darkness would await. An empty abyss that he gazes at and, in return, would gaze at him.

His team members were spread out, moving to the same rhythm but on different parts of their stage. The cheers and the screams are loud, but they are louder as they belt out the lyrics they know by heart. 

When his part comes up, Isagi waves his hands as the cameras pan onto him. His eyes turn into sweet crescents, and his lips were gently tugged at the corners to give that smile he knows his fans adore.

"さあタイムトラベルだ あの日まで  取り返そう 初めての告白を"

(Alright, time to travel back in time, to that day; Let's take it back, my first confession.)

He holds his microphone out towards the myriad of lights, and the fans take it in stride, chanting the next part that they know by heart.

"全部全部無かったことに  それでいいんだ  それでいいんだっけ"

(As if nothing had ever happened; That's fine; Was this fine?)

Altogether, they continue the rest of the song, a melody of the idol and the fan that can never be perfectly replicated because it is an art that forms right during that moment, only captured in film and residing in fond memories of the past.

When the song finishes, the members all make it back to the middle, standing in their respective positions. Isagi is the heart as his members structure themselves around him; he is their beating center.

As all endings go, they hold on to each other's hands and bow together. They each shout out their gratitude amidst the loud cheering. Though it is nearing the end, there's a persistent spread of happiness all around, a jubilant mood as the members shine with their bright smiles.

As the leader, Hiori starts with his speech. "Everyone! Thank you so much for coming out to our concert tonight! We always work to give our 100% in each performance, and we are so grateful for your support every time!" With the hold of everyone's attention, his gaze is the epitome of doe innocence despite having the dominant and commanding role as a leader. 

Following was their resident visual, Chigiri, who brushes his red hair aside and lightly patted the sweat off his face with the back of his hand. 

"I wanted to give an extra thank you for all of the love and care you all have shown me this past while," Chigiri pauses as he takes a deep breath. "The hiatus had been tough on me, and the recovery process for my knee had been quite painful." His smile had turned more into a wince, and Isagi reached out his arm to hold his team member.

"However, the one thing that helped get me through it all was our beloved fans! The messages that you have sent to me became a great pillar of support for me, and they were a reminder that there are always people that will be waiting for me."

The fans cheered after Chigiri's speech, with some yelling out various messages of don’t be sad, and everything will be alright! Isagi was next in line and cleared his throat, which caused a momentary increase in the cheering volume.

"Our fans are so lovely as always! You know what makes half of our shows are your chants right?" To prove his point, Isagi pauses as he lets the fans respond in their loud shouts. He hears a million things at once, but above them all he hears his name being echoed, over and over like a never-ending tune.

If the cheers weren't loud before, they increase exponentially when Bachira suddenly jumps to embrace him from behind.

"Ah ah, Isagi has to go and say cheesy stuff again, huh?" He responds with a playful jab. Unfazed, Bachira continues, mentioning all that he was grateful for from the fans and how fun it was performing. Like all the members before him, Isagi listens attentively to Bachira's speech and nods when necessary.

Last to finish it off was Kurona, a member whom Isagi thinks is the dark horse of stealing the hearts of fans, though it was always unintentional. Kurona had stated that he doesn't like to stand out as much, but his idol image consisted of only lovable and strong points from his irreplaceable supportive role.

Altogether, they are pieces of a carefully constructed vision of dreams and desires. They are the bright colors artfully used to create a dynamic picture of talent and beauty. And at that moment, Isagi truly had thought that they were perfect.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

J-STARS Daily

POPULAR IDOL GROUP CONFIRMED FOR UPCOMING COMEBACK

LockedON announces a comeback for early summer.

October 15, 2022

The boy group that has taken the world by surprise in a whirlwind of excitement and passion is making headlines when teasers were posted from the group's official Twitter account.

LockedON is a relatively new idol group that had only debuted less than a year ago under the Egoist agency, a new entertainment company created by the well-known Ego Jinpachi. As stated by Jinpachi, the members (Hiori, Isagi, Bachira, Kurona, and Chigiri) were carefully handpicked to create the "most ideal" idol group. LockedON boasts the likes and admiration of many fans from across the world, with the member's individual social media accounts parading millions of followers.

Images that were posted to the Twitter page reveal that members will each have a part in producing songs for the full upcoming album. While the concept of the comeback has yet to be confirmed, fans are seen speculating on social media that themes such as "youth" will be emphasized based on the teaser images. This will be the first time members will have an active role in producing the album since their debut.

Follow J-STARS on Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok for the latest news updates on your favorite Japanese celebrities!

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He often wonders if there will always be eyes on him. When he leans over the balcony ledge, he becomes uninhibited, his fear of falling is drowned by a sudden feeling of calm clarity. In his mind, he thinks about the chance that someone was looking at him, so far up into the sky and darkness, questioning whether he was really going to tip over.

Becoming a public figure gave Isagi the paranoia that, really, his privacy was never really private. Most people don't bat a glance at the ordinary and everyday, and he fits neither of those two descriptors. Wherever he goes, a show will always follow him. He thinks that at that moment if he does push himself over, there would be at least one bystander that had their camera trained on him from the start.

Isagi closes his eyes and basks in the chilling night air, a reprieve from the hot, stifling feeling from inside the apartment where his group members were drunkenly, but still endearingly, babbling to one another.

His quiet moments become interrupted when he hears the door slide open behind him, and he senses an upcoming hug from behind.

From memory alone, he feels Bachira's arms snake around him as he plants his chin on top of his shoulder, sharing the view in front of them.

"What are you doing out here looking so lonely?"

Isagi smells the alcohol under his breath, but he knows that after him, Bachira had drank the least.

"I needed some fresh air."

His eyes are open now, and he can feel Bachira's gaze on him. "Hmmm," he ponders. "There's something on your mind."

He maneuvers himself so now his back was leaning against the balcony railing, and Bachira was forced to let go.

"Just feeling a bit sad that this was our last concert for the next while."

Bachira let out a short laugh. "Of course, you are feeling sad about that. I swear concerts always give you some kind of high that's way more intense than the rest of us feel."

Isagi shares Bachira's feelings of amusement as he tips his head slightly back with a smile. This time, he stares up at the starless sky above him.

He knows he was being a bit overdramatic, as it's not like they won't be performing anymore. They still had small appearances here and there before their comeback, but Isagi would still argue that there was nothing like having the whole concert stadium to themselves. The grandness and largeness, all filled with the love that others had for them. Performing will always be his lifeblood, and the biggest stage makes him feel more alive than ever.

Bachira made a sudden noise before a bright phone screen was shoved in front of him. "Itoshi Sae is coming back to Japan for his next movie!"

Isagi feels the surprise hit him like a shock of cold water, all his previous thoughts disintegrating as the popular actor's face filled his mind. He reads the short article in front of him, his eyes widening instinctively.

The ever-elusive Itoshi Sae was coming back to Japan after leaving for years out of nowhere. While he wouldn't say that he was the biggest fan of the actor, he couldn't lie that the works that feature Sae compelled him to watch them. Isagi, like everyone, recognizes the brilliance behind his acting and why he was so sought after.

Isagi nudges the phone away and sighs. "Well, I guess the media will be up in a frenzy reporting about that."

Bachira’s eyes are glued to his screen and Isagi watches as he rapidly scrolls through all of the latest updates. "Hopefully, his new movie doesn't overshadow our comeback."

Isagi shakes his head. "I don't think the timing would match up. Ego would have foreseen this."

Realization dawns on Bachira's face. "Oh, right, I guess that's true."

Isagi moves away from the railing, signaling that he is heading back and Bachira follows behind him. He had become too cold and was ready to brace the drunken mess inside. When he made his way back to his spot on the couch, Kurona, who sat beside him, stared at him with a cloudy look on his flushed face.

"You okay, Kuro?"

Isagi saw how his eyes suddenly became bright before he lunged forward and hugged him around his waist. Kurona buries his face into the fabric of his shirt, murmuring familiar nonsense that Isagi no longer tries to decipher. He moves his arm around Kurona's body and holds him as he watches the television screen in front of him.

The group was watching some dating reality show for fun. Isagi recalled that it was Chigiri's sister who recommended it, and many of the guys were always looking for opportunities to sidle up close to the sibling. However, Isagi doubts most of them would even remember what happened from how drunk they were, and would not be able to improvise during a conversation about the show. Still, he looks at them strewn around him in fondness.

Hiori was already passed out on the recliner, while Chigiri was aggressively talking Bachira's ear off about some random passerby that deserved the wrath of his numerous insults.

Isagi thinks to himself that without knowing who they were on the stages and billboards, they would appear to be like an ordinary group of friends, spending a Friday night drinking and having fun.

He also knows that their fans would yearn to see them have moments like these, pictures of them living like normal people, pretending to be like normal people. However, these moments are precious to Isagi, and it's one of the few pieces of himself that he refuses to give up to the public.

They can have so much of him, and he willingly allows that, but they will never have his everything.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

After so many rounds, Isagi had forgotten how many times they had already restarted the song. Out of breath and a sweaty mess, he was tired, and his group members were not faring any better.

Hiori claps his hands together. "Alright guys, I know it feels like we've already done it a million times, but we need to practice this choreography for a bit more."

Despite how his body may protest, Isagi agrees that they also need more practice. He hears groans from his group members, but they all move back to their starting position. When the music starts, the members each follow along with their respective dance moves. They remained synchronized until the chorus where Isagi catches himself moving slightly off-beat. He silently reprimands himself as he pushes himself to follow more closely with the others.

When the song ends again, Isagi bends down as he breathes heavily. He hears Hiori give them some words of encouragement before a knocking sound interrupts him.

Anri stands at the door with a sheepish look on her face. "Ah sorry! I just need to borrow Isagi for a bit."

Isagi straightens up and tells his group that he'll be back before following their manager out. They move aside from the doors when Anri turns to him with unbridled excitement in her eyes.

"You got a movie role!"

The unexpected news stuns him in place. He gives a bewildered look to their manager, barely holding back the questions that were about to spill out of him.

Anri places her hand on his shoulder. "I know this is coming out of nowhere, and that Ego really does not tell you all what he is ever planning, but long story short, he was contacted by a director that wanted to have you in their movie."

When he hears how a famous figure in the industry had wanted him, Isagi couldn't help the pride that swells up in him. As the center of their group, he was the one that drew the most eyes and attention. However, he knocked himself off his high horse when he realized that he was going to be acting, in a role, in an actual movie, which he has never done before.

"Wait, but-"

Anri claps him on the same shoulder. "You never acted before, we know, so for the next while you are going to be taking some basic acting lessons. And don't worry if acting is not your forte because your role in the movie is very minimal." She then shrugs. "Honestly, you are mostly there to bring the fans in, which sounds degrading, but those were Ego's words."

Isagi suddenly imagines the many scenarios where his acting actually turned out really bad, and he does not want to lose his own fans over this. He still hasn't properly processed how he felt about acting, was he excited or terrified? Did he want to do this? He knows career-wise, it helps branch him out to meet other key people in the world of entertainment, but it felt too soon, like everything was moving faster than he had paced himself for.

He must have shown his inner conflict on his face because Anri soon gives him a slightly sympathetic look. "If you really don't want to do it, I'll help you fight Ego on this."

Isagi shakes his head. "No, well I haven't come to that decision yet, but I'm going to need to sleep it over. Though I am leaning more towards doing it."

Anri immediately brightens up after his response. "Okay, great! I'll give you a few days to mull it over and let me know as soon as possible what your decision is."

She soon leaves him after wishing him the best for the rest of dance practice. When the hallway was empty, Isagi slumped against the wall. He was trying to come to terms with what his future may entail now. As a passive bystander to other idols who had become actors, he has seen many of them receive backlash for their lackluster or incredibly poor acting skills.

He also does not even know what he wants to achieve with his acting. Did he actually want to be really good and have people praise him to act more? Or did he just want to be good enough so that he didn't humiliate himself? From Anri's description, he seemed like the director viewed him as a token, a method to up the star power and drive attention towards the film. He knows he is being used in that way, but it honestly did not bother him.

When it comes to business, his face had value and in a way, his career as a celebrity made him a commodity for business deals. Ego made that point painstakingly clear when he signed his contract. His lack of reluctance in trading away aspects of his humanity should have been frightening.

But Isagi had stronger aspirations. He had been promised to be made into the brightest star, an unforgettable and timeless piece to the hearts of many.

In a sea of darkness, he will be the reason why there is light.

Chapter Text

II. November 2022

Since getting the role, Isagi's schedule becomes more or less crammed, but still terrifyingly organized due to Anri's efforts of always planning ahead.

To fit in his acting classes with his regular schedule with the group, he begins his day much earlier than his group mates. When they were still tucked under their warm covers, Isagi gets up before sunrise to attend his lessons before reuniting with them later in the day for a series of vocal and dance practices. During his lunch and dinner breaks, he is either practicing his script or working on his songwriting for their upcoming album. Even when they were shooting an advertisement or commercial, Isagi could be seen huddled around the corner when it wasn't his turn, practicing his lines.

In the weeks since he started to take acting as a serious skill to work on, his progress was more or less average. At first, he tried to imitate actors who had performed in similar roles, which were numerous as his character could be best described as a kind and supportive friend. While it seemed like it was something he could do, the imitation does not feel natural when he does it, he can mimic the same emotions in his voice, and manipulate his expressions similarly, but there was a certain feel to it that was much too fake.

As an idol, Isagi knows what fake looks like. The thing about being fake is that he can be fake, but he has to make it look like it's not fake. Like having a side-by-side comparison between an authentic and a fake, the idea was that they had to be identical images that only the most clever could tell apart. Isagi knows he always has to seem authentic, even when he is not.

His smiles, personality, and attitude, had to be faked at some times, but not all. In a way, he was already acting as an idol to become an idol. He wasn't trying to force himself into becoming someone else, but rather he saw it as embodying the image that he claimed to be his ideal, setting forth illusions of authenticity and masquerading the fake when appropriate. Isagi tried to channel that same method when it came to his script, creating a character that was passable in quality but most definitely not his pinnacle. He can act as that supportive friend on the screen, but in reality, a true close friend would be able to pull apart the threads he weaved together in a more loose than tight fashion.

The confidence he has towards his role doesn't waver until the table read when he meets him for the first time.

Isagi was friendly with most of the crew and his fellow co-stars. Seated with the other supporting cast members, Isagi eased into an easy conversation with them. They keep it relatively general, mostly giving a quick backstory as to how they got cast. When it was his turn to introduce himself, he was interrupted by a question from someone sitting on his left side.

"Aren't you that idol?"

He eyes the printed name on the script next to his, Nagi Seishirou. While the name was unknown to Isagi, his appearance stood out significantly when he looked at him for the first time. His hair was a messily styled shade of pure white, and his eyes held a fathomless gaze. They were wide and dark, and Isagi likened them to peering into a void of space.

Isagi puts on his friendly smile, a bit warmhearted but nothing too exaggerated.

"Yes, I am a part of LockedON! Have you heard about us?"

Nagi shrugs, sounding more bored than anything. "I guess I've seen your stuff on the news. I think my boss talked about liking that long-haired guy in your group."

His quick recognition of that bare description sparked a rush of excitement, he felt the stars beaming in his eyes as he graciously boasted about his group member. 

"Oh, that's Chigiri! He's our visual, but I think his dancing and performance skills are so good that it makes him stand out more than his looks."

He watches as Nagi tilts his head to the side, the expression on his face completely blank.

"I don't really know much about being an idol, but if my boss says that you guys are good, then I guess I'll believe it."

Isagi can't say that he has met another celebrity as apathetic as Nagi, but he can't say he minds his indifferent personality.

He talks a bit more about his group before a movement catches Isagi's eyes and their director stands up from their seat. 

"Alright! We are going to get started with the table read now, if you all can please-"

The door, which had been closed after the presumably last person had entered, was suddenly swung open to give entrance to an imposing figure. The room falls into complete silence as everyone looks at the mysterious man who gives fashionably late a new meaning.

In a room filled with beautiful and striking actors, he held the grand prize without even trying. In a hypnotic trance, Isagi observes the man barely give a nod in acknowledgment to the people in the room before sitting down in the last empty chair.

There was one name on the casting list that Isagi had not matched to a face yet.

Itoshi Rin.

A man with a surname that was hard to ignore and draw connections to. From a distance, the similarities to the renowned actor were definitely there. Isagi catches a glimpse of eyes that were the familiar teal color he had seen many times, and the air he puts off was equally as cold and detached. Based on his initial observations alone, he would assume that the two were relatives, though he was unable to discern their actual closeness.

Isagi noticed that he had not looked at anyone since entering the room, nor had he said anything at all. He grabbed the script that was in front of him and flipped to the first page, casually skimming through the lines. Amongst the murmurs around him, he remained unopposed, his presence sturdy and unwavering in the gossip of others. 

The director cleared their throat. "As I was saying before Itoshi-san here has decided to join us, we will be starting the table read now. Please open up to the first page, and we'll start with the scene there."

The effect of Rin's entrance disappeared as soon as they got started with the read-through. Isagi stays silent until the lines of his character come up. He was playing a man named Aoi, the close friend of the male lead, Jirou, a writer who loses passion in his work after the tragedy of his brother's death.

Jirou was brought to life by a voice given to the character, and the person who had lent their voice was none other than Rin.

The first time Isagi ever talks to Rin is through a script, where they read through a scene disguised as other people, putting on a mask of individuals that share a platonic love for each other from their years of close friendship.

When they read their lines, Rin remains steadfast in avoiding eye contact while Isagi keeps stealing glances at him. Even though each time he looks and the view never changes, he couldn't find himself stopping.

As the leading character, Rin had minimal breaks in the reading. Isagi imagines that to him, Rin saw himself as the only person in the room. He was reading for himself, not for others, and he was talking to himself, not talking to others. When he was not reading the script, he made comments to the director about changes being made. The way he spoke conveyed the changes as a requirement, not a mere suggestion. This scene should be this. The dialogue here needs to be cut. My line here needs to be changed.

Isagi watched as Rin quickly built an army of fear around him. Whenever Rin opens his mouth to talk, Isagi could see the others shrink from the intimidation. This was no longer their movie, but Rin's movie.

The table read had ended after a few hours, and without saying bye to anyone, Rin was the first to get up and leave. Isagi could see the visible stress on the directors and production team faces as they quickly went through all the changes that had to be made. Due to his minor role, Isagi can't say he felt the same level of stress that the others were feeling, but there was a part of him that felt a bit unnerved about working with Rin.

When about half of the room's occupants had left, Isagi had noticed that beside him, Nagi had not made any attempt to leave. He saw the guy slouch forward as he played some kind of game on his phone.

"Are you waiting for someone?" Isagi asks.

Nagi nods. "My ride isn't here yet."

Without paying any mind to him, Isagi bids goodbyes to the crew members that were still there. He then wanders out of the door, going down an empty hallway he mistakenly thought was the way outside. Isagi only realizes what he had done when he ends up at a wing of the building that he does not recognize. 

His phone buzzes to let him know that Anri was here to pick him up, and he curses under his breath for getting lost. The various signs posted around do point him back to the direction he came from, and it takes him a few minutes to get back.

He didn't think that anyone would be heading down the way he had come from, but then he unexpectedly sees Rin, quickly striding toward him.

Isagi's heart starts to beat a little faster. Almost unnoticeably, Rin had flitted his eyes at him before returning to look straight ahead. When they get closer to each other, Isagi feels the urge to say something, but his mind blanks on what to say. He realizes that he doesn't know what he wants, from Rin, from whatever exchange they may have.

Isagi couldn't even say a simple greeting before the opportunity had fled from him, and Rin had turned a corner and disappeared.

Later when Isagi was in the car with Anri as he was being driven back to his dorm, he tried to pry for some answers, to make sense of the loss he had suddenly felt inside.

"So how did it go?" Anri asks cheerfully.

"How closely related is Itoshi Rin to Itoshi Sae?"

Anri goes quiet, and Isagi can see her trying to gauge his expression from the rearview mirror.

"I believe that they are brothers."

Isagi widens his eyes. They are much closer in the family line than he has guessed.

"Don't let Ego know that I'm telling you this, but he actually tried to poach Rin-san for the agency, though he refused, much to Ego's disappointment."

He was immediately curious to know more. Unlike the name of his sibling, Itoshi Rin was one that has never been heard of before. Isagi is sure that this movie was Rin's debut film, and the first time ever he is appearing in the entertainment scene. The fact that Sae has never made mention of having a sibling, especially one that was pursuing the same career, was also remarkably interesting.

"I think he wanted an agency where there was more of a focus on acting, and Egoist Entertainment was still starting out at the time."

Isagi couldn't help but feel like something else was missing. He was sure that there was some key piece of Rin's background information that he doesn't know yet but would be crucial to know. Sae most likely was a part of it, but for now, he can only make assumptions about the brothers.

Above all of this, Isagi still doesn't know why he suddenly cares so much about a name he has never heard of until now. Getting to know Rin wasn't going to help him improve his image as an idol, and outside of the movie, he was sure they weren't going to interact with each other.

Though they are part of the same world, they come from different places, places they will return to when it's all over.

Despite the terrible feeling he gets, Isagi comes to some sort of a resolution that he won't bother with Rin. He'll come to work, perform his role to the best that he can, and then he'll leave at the end with his name on a potential blockbuster.

All that really matters right now is his own self and really, in the end, Isagi was the best at thinking for himself.

 ⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

"Please welcome LockedON!"

Amidst the loud cheers and applause, Isagi and his group members take their cue to head out, waving to their fans, and bowing at the host of the show.

After an exchange of quick pleasantries, all the members moved to sit down in their practiced order. Isagi sat in the middle of the small couch with Bachira and Chigiri beside him. Hiori and Kurona were behind them but sat in chairs that raised them above the trio.

"Welcome to Evenings with Elegance, I am your host Aryu, and I am here tonight with the very stylish members of LockedON!"

Having been on the show before, the members were quite comfortable around Aryu and are used to his peculiar enjoyment of aesthetics.

"Thank you Aryu-san for having us! We are glad to be back." Hiori politely chimes.

Aryu embellished his actions by holding a hand over his heart, much to the audience's amusement. "Oh Hiori-san, you are as cute as ever! Tell me, how has it been preparing for your next album?"

"It's been going well! It is a learning curve, with the whole process of getting involved with the production, but I think it is worthwhile because the songs we are writing will bring us closer to our fans."

Bachira pipes up. "Yes! When we write our songs, I hope our fans can see how we put our own selves in them, like a small gift!"

"So lovingly said! I'm sure your fans will definitely appreciate the effort, and of course, it is not a LockedON song if it is not a hit! How does it feel to have your debut song skyrocket up the charts again after your last concert?"

Hiori answers again for them. "It was really unexpected, but it was a welcomed surprise. It reminded us of our roots and where we first started. Even though it seems like we keep hitting new achievements with every new song that comes out, I think it's important that we always look back at how it all began for us. Also, we were happy to see that there are fans who still like our older stuff!"

Aryu nods his head in approval. "Indeed, what a profound reflection! Now, let us move on to some rumors I've been hearing. Isagi-san, are you really acting in a movie?"

Prepared for the question, Isagi runs through what he was instructed to say. "As a matter of fact, I am! I will be playing a supporting role in the upcoming movie, Days of Blue. "

"How exciting; are you enjoying the whole acting business?"

"It feels new for sure. I am also taking lessons on the side because, of course, I want to make our fans proud and make sure LockedON is represented well!" Isagi raises a fist to show his fighting spirit.

"What stylish determination! Do you think one day you'll leave being an idol behind and become an actor full-time?"

Isagi adamantly shakes his head. "Being an idol is who I am and-" he then turns to look at each of his members with a grin on his face, "LockedON is a family that I never want to leave because I love all my members so much."

Aryu cups his face with an adoring look in his eyes. "Isagi-san, you are such a loving sweetheart! I swear you steal my heart every time you come on this show!"

At this, the audience starts cheering again, and it takes several attempts to calm them down.

"Alright, alright! Now that we had a nice little Q and A, it is time for the real show starter! When we come back, LockedON will be performing a small song for us, so stay tuned!"

The outro music begins to play as the cameras pan away. Isagi watches as those around him stand up to take a break, while Aryu makes a beeline to Chigiri and the two begin to catch up on topics that really make them seem like close friends. 

Isagi makes the move to get ready for their performance. He spots the show's staff members shifting some furniture around as they prepare a small stage for them. When Isagi goes and joins them, he shakes off the staff's protest and insists that he wants to help them. He knew it was important that it wasn't just the fans that had a good opinion of him.

And so works dutifully, making quick work of the task he decided upon and receiving the staff's gratitude afterward. While most would see it as unnecessary work for his actual job, Isagi knows how advantageous it is to cater to as many people as possible.

After all, if he ever gets dragged through the dirt, he needs ways to clean off his image.

 ⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

Aryu Jyubei ✓ @aryualwaysstylin · 38m

So happy to be with @LockedON again! 10/10 points of style for their performance as always <3

💬 5,374      🔁 15.3K      ❤️ 188.7K      📊 2.5M

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Movies Central

Highly anticipated films to watch out for in 2023

Here at Movies Central, we have compiled a list of future releases we are sure to be hits!

1. My Glory (Release date: December 3, 2023)

Starring Itoshi Sae, it'll be his first film since returning to Japan! Set in a historical-fantasy universe, the movie follows a man named Kento, as he fights for a claim on the emperor's throne. We are expecting some highly intense fighting scenes, alongside some heartfelt relationships to be developed. For a film to catch Itoshi's attention, it is almost guaranteed to be a showstopper!

2. ...

3. ...

4. ...

5. Days of Blue (Release date: December 10, 2023)

Along with an all-star cast, it has been confirmed that Itoshi Sae's younger sibling, Itoshi Rin, will be making his acting debut with Days of Blue. The story will be a certified tear-jerker as Jirou (played by Itoshi Rin) finds the meaning of his life after tragically losing his brother. Jirou will face several trials as he comes to terms with his loss, and must somehow reinvent his life as a writer to move on.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

"Action!"

Isagi rings the doorbell. He is visibly agitated, choosing to ring the doorbell again before knocking on the door.

Jirou!

He stands there, anxiously waiting for a few seconds before moving his hand to turn the doorknob, finding the door to be unlocked. There is a show of surprise on his face before it quickly contours into a worried frown.

Isagi enters the house, running to check all of the rooms. 

Jirou! He calls out again.

The last room he enters is the bedroom, where he finds a still figure slumped on the bed. The room was a mess, various items were strewn about, and from the corner of his eye, he saw several picture frames that were shattered against the wall. Isagi rushes next to the person, turning them over so that their face is visible.

Rin's eyes were closed. If not for the situation he was in, he would have made a perfect picture of being in a serene trance of sleep. He had looked so much in peace that Isagi had momentarily forgotten the dire situation that he was in.

Isagi shakes him. Wake up! Rin remained undisturbed for a bit before he stirred a bit, showing signs of waking. His eyes had suddenly fluttered open, surprising Isagi by the abruptness.

This was when Isagi made his first mistake. He stared too long, forgetting his line for a minor second, and when he caught himself, he had already broken character.

"Cut!"

He hears Rin click his tongue at him, and Isagi was quick to offer an apology.

"Sorry, I wasn't sure why I-"

Rin coldly cuts him off. "Save it. If you are going to talk, then at least make it useful." He barely spares Isagi a glance before he gets up and walks away.

Isagi was taken aback by his rude tone; he found himself stuck for a second as he tried to process the quick glimpse of Rin's attitude towards him. While most of the celebrities that he has met do tend to play nice on the surface, he does encounter a few here and there that were discourteous and terrible to others. From their power high, it had seemed like they thought they could get away with anything.

Dealing with awful people was something he often struggled with more than his group mates because he was the one that was quick to lose his temper. But with practice, he was much better at controlling himself, and he pulled it together as they started the scene again. 

When they retake the scene, Isagi was adamant about not making any mistakes the second time. While he did succeed in that aspect, the relief he felt when the scene was over was short-lived when Rin decides to casually tear him a new one.

"Why do you look so relieved when that acting was nothing to write home about?"

The crew around them go silent as they watch the conflict unfold in front of them. Isagi felt the small tendrils of anger rise up as he was prepared to defend himself. However, there was a splash of shame in what he was feeling, because he also knew the performance he just gave was not his greatest. Though the anger was quick to take over because he knew it wasn't the worst either, and he was certain that it was passable in quality, especially for a beginner.

He takes a deep breath before responding.

"I know there is still a lot I need to work on with acting, but I really am trying my best."

Rin scoffs. "So you are saying I'm supposed to acknowledge your efforts? Even though the results are closer to shit than anything?"

Isagi stands there, trying to remain unperturbed by Rin's callous speech.

In his mind, he imagines his group members, and how he was representing their group in their absence. He felt himself having a greater hold of his emotions as he forced himself to remain amicable. "Do you have any pointers on how I can do better?"

He sees Rin narrowing his eyes at him. "Your tone is monotonous, yet you still exaggerate your expressions too much. You don't convey anything impactful with your lines, which shows how obvious you are in faking your role."

Isagi takes in the criticism with a wince, but he still gives Rin a smile through it all. 

"You're right, I know I need to practice with my voice and expressions. Thank you for pointing out what I need to work on."

It had seemed that Rin could see through his forced politeness as it does nothing to lighten the mood between them. If anything, Rin's gaze became colder and unappeased.

"You can't honestly hope to achieve any working results, do you? It's laughable that you think you can improve, given that you are some idol that took on this job without thinking about the responsibilities."

The smile on his face distorts as he fights off a scowl. "But I do think about the responsibilities, and that is why I am working to give it my all."

Rin remains unfazed, twisting the knife even deeper. "You produce nothing but pathetic results. You're an idol who thinks that they can act because you see yourself acting on the stage, but that cheap image you uphold insults what acting really is."

So badly, Isagi wants to lash back, but it only adds to his frustration when he knows that he can't, because Rin's acting was perfect. Even an amateur like him knows that when it comes to acting, he will never be considered as good as Rin. He didn't think before to be as good as Rin, but he knows now that he'll never be acknowledged if he was anything less.

A stern voice cuts through the string of tension between them. "That's enough Itoshi-san." After remaining in the background for so long, the director finally decided to step in, putting an end to their almost entirely one-sided argument.

Rin does not say anything else as he takes his leave, shoving past Isagi along the way. He picks up the small conversations his co-workers are having around him. Isagi must have looked pitiful in their eyes, but he takes it in stride because, really, he could use this moment to his advantage.

Rin called his image cheap, but Isagi could have argued that it took skills and training to create and wear that image. From whatever had spiraled out between them, Isagi can say with confidence that he was the victim that many will side with on the gossip forums and tabloids. He was the one who tried to remain pleasant as he was being ripped apart by insults. They will see him as the innocent and sensible one, while Rin will carry the shadow as a perpetrator who cruelly attacks for no reason.

He may have the skills to be a renowned actor, and he may be beautiful enough to attract fans on his looks alone, but he won't be able to make them stay.

When it comes to surviving as a celebrity, Isagi is already way ahead of the game.

Chapter Text

III. January 2023

Whatever stage Isagi performs on doesn’t matter to him as long as he has eyes that find themselves inevitably compelled toward him. Time and place don’t matter when there is always an endless stream of content. He was quick to show the new skills he learned and the mastery of old ones; Isagi makes sure that the cameras that capture him will never catch a dull moment of his.

The biggest music awards ceremony in Japan had their group performing and all the preparations for it were to ensure they would hold the grandest performance there; that without a doubt many would bestow to them that number one position.

It did not go longer than 10 minutes but it was rather lengthy for one single performance. Several of their songs were remixed for one continuous mash-up and the awe-inspiring scale of it was partly achieved by the many back-up dancers they had for the performance.

The entire experience was one of those once-in-a-lifetime things for Isagi. He may have other shows later on that were of equal if not a larger scale, but this one was still so special to him. It truly could never be the same, he felt how bright he had shined then, his excitement contributing to a high that made him feel like he was truly on top of the world for that moment.

When it was over, he was still brimming to the edges with his emotions, barely able to contain himself as he jumped onto Bachira’s back as they exited off the stage amongst the cheers. His other group members were in a similar shape, happily beaming with wonder and amazement in their eyes that they really had just done it, pulling off one of their biggest shows since their debut.

Isagi had his head up in the clouds when the excitement slowly began to wear off, his daze only shaken off when they had changed out of their stage outfits and back into their formal suits for the occasion. They were quietly seated back in their section among the other celebrities.

Without thinking too much about it, Isagi picked a seat that had him next to someone else outside of their group. He was settled in before he heard an unfamiliar voice address him from the side. 

“Yoichi, was it?”

From the side glimpse that he gets, Isagi catches a bright azure color with a peek of red. When he does turn his head fully to properly greet them, he comes face to face with someone he thought would never get the chance to meet in person.

Despite the rudeness of how he was addressed with his first name, he immediately pulls together his most courteous look and manner. After all, he was about to address a foreign famous star to an international audience.

“Yes, and you must be Kaiser, I’ve seen a few of your drama series.”

Kaiser leans in close, a bit too close for Isagi’s own liking. He looked confident, if not a bit condescending with the slight smirk he wears.

“Would you say that you are a fan of my works then?”

He remains unfazed, a polite smile still framed nicely on his features. “I think you are talented for sure.”

A light chuckle rings out, Kaiser amused by his choice of words.

“Well, I can say that I am most truly a fan of yours.”

As Isagi sits there, he is a bit nervous about what he was getting himself into, talking to Michael Kaiser in this encounter. He knows there are fans, both his and Kaiser’s, sitting somewhere among the other guests that may be eyeing this particular interaction right now. He thinks about the image they make, how somewhat intimate they may look right now, with Kaiser casually leaning in ever so slightly with each thing he says.

Isagi is alert as he observes the man’s every action. He managed to catch Kaiser’s eyes flickering towards something behind him that had sharpened the edges of his smile. Isagi turned slowly and caught, most likely imperceptible to an untrained eye, the back of a phone facing them directly.

When he turns back to Kaiser, he sees the man was already looking at him, no longer focused on the camera. In fact, Kaiser makes himself even more daring as he rests an arm around his shoulder and pulls him closer.

What a pair we must make, he whispered into his ear.

Isagi glares at him, knowing exactly what Kaiser was trying to use him for.

Publicity, specifically with the Japanese fans.

It was from practice that he managed to shrug off the arm in a light-hearted manner that made it seem as though there was no animosity behind the action.

“If you want something from me, then you are going to need to offer something back.” He whispered, not hiding the bite in his words.

He can’t deny the thrill that runs through him when Kaiser’s eyes widen almost maniacally.

“You are going to be in for quite a show, Yoichi.”

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

J-STARS Daily

LOCKEDON WINS ARTIST GROUP AND ALBUM OF THE YEAR

The famous idol group thanks fans and staff for the win during a tearful speech

January 04, 2023

It’s award show season and LockedON proves once again to be the reigning king for most awards won among other idols. This year at the Tokyo Music Awards, the boy group took home the win for both Artist Group and Album of the Year. The group never forgets to voice their gratitude toward their many fans, even taking the time to give a separate speech in English to show their appreciation towards the international fanbase.

Boasting their third win for album of the year, the award comes with no surprises as the winning album, “The Path” had songs charting in the top 10 for months since their release across several music streaming services. Congratulations to LockedON for their well-deserved win!

Follow J-STARS on Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok for the latest news updates on your favorite Japanese celebrities!

✩

The People’s Gossip

German Actor Kaiser Seen Cozying Up with LockedON’s Isagi

By: Anonymous Fan #5

In this week of unexpected couples, we have been graced with secret paparazzi photos of Kaiser and Isagi having cute little dates at various cafes and restaurants around Tokyo. According to our well-researched timeline, the two had started getting acquainted with one another after they were seen sitting closely together at the 2023 Tokyo Music Awards.

I like to think it was fate that brought these two together! Kaiser was one of the many foreign celebrity guests invited to the award show and normally would not have that many interactions with Japanese idols. How could it be that on that day, he would be the one that would be seated next to our dear idol?? The stars must have definitely aligned that day for those two because it appears to be that they are really hitting it off. Not to mention that fans on both sides are mostly supportive of their relationship (#kaisagi was trending for a notable amount of time I must add).

I for one, will be avidly following these two in hopes of catching some sort of official confirmation of their relationship. I will be spending my days now watching Kaiser’s dramas because thank you Isagi for introducing your fans to this magnificent eye candy.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

The scenes Isagi had were not numerous, but they were painful in a different way. Most if not all of his scenes had him with Rin, who has not made any attempts to better their relationship.

Isagi did try, as in he put in some effort at times but he couldn’t say that he approached the task wholeheartedly. At first, he tried to make a bit of small talk during their breaks. God forbid he ever tried to approach the man when he was alone in his dressing room, but during the odd times’ Rin decided not to isolate himself in the said room, Isagi tried to ask how his day was, or if he had any fun plans after. He was either ignored or brushed off coldly with a “none of your business” type of response.

He then tried sharing a bit. When they were both not filming a scene, he would go grab an extra bottle of water or some kind of snack for Rin, who would often be attentively studying his upcoming lines. The success rate was slightly better in terms of responses, about half the time he would turn Isagi away with a “don’t need it” or he would grab the item without any show of thanks.

This went on for about a month, with no amount of considerable progress that was achieved. During their scenes, they were able to behave professionally enough and acted as though there was no sort of difficulties between them. But inside, Isagi felt a mixture of awkwardness and annoyance, sometimes teetering towards the cusps of anger when Rin provokes him enough with those snide remarks. One day, it did get pretty bad, with several magnitudes in terribleness when compared to their first scene together.

They had just finished the part where their characters were having a heart-to-heart, sharing stories and feelings like what normal close friends would do. And it was painful to film, clearly for both of them.

It was probably the fifth time they had to retake the scene when Rin snaps.

“Can’t you pull it together?”

Isagi felt the last of his restraints disappear when he fought back. “I’m not the only one who’s doing a shitty job here! You keep looking so fucking constipated just because you can’t tolerate saying anything nice.”

Rin stands up, looking down at him with that cruel look on his face as if Isagi was even less than vermin or a pest. Without thinking twice, Isagi stands up as well and continues to glare at him.

“Admit it you asshole, you weren’t that great of an actor you thought you were because you can’t even do this simple scene-”

In an aggressive manner, Rin grabs the front of his shirt and roughly yanks Isagi toward him.

“That is fucking rich coming from a cheap idol like you, who is only here to make the director a quick buck with those brainwashed fans of yours.”

For what happened next, to put it simply, was violence. Raw, unadulterated physical violence as Isagi was the first to swing his fist at Rin’s face. Isagi fought viciously, hitting as hard as he could, aiming for spots he knew were the most painful. The fight had only been a couple of seconds at most before they were pulled away by the filming crew. During that short time frame, both of them still looked severely beaten up and ragged. Their once nicely styled hair was ruined, Rin’s right eye was starting to darken into a bruise, his nose bleeding and Isagi was sporting a busted lip among the bleeding scratches on his forehead.

Completely fed up with the duo, the director sent them home for the day without much protest between the two. Isagi knew the director wasn’t going to waste any further time filming this one scene and would have to compromise with the takes they already had done. And if they tried to wrangle them into shooting it again, there was guaranteed to be another bloodshed, which everyone would be smart enough to avoid.

Feeling like a complete wreck inside, Isagi called Anri to come to pick him up before he headed outside in hopes of cooling down. As he passed by the hall that brought him to the back exit, he unexpectedly saw Nagi sitting hunched against a wall, avidly paying attention to something on his phone, which Isagi automatically assumes is the mobile game he is always playing.

When Isagi got near, he heard him call out. 

“That sounded rough back there.”

Perhaps it was that lowkey manner Nagi always seemed to exhibit around people, but Isagi found himself forgetting about his anger for that moment. No longer was he on the verge of another outburst, but instead, he felt the shame take over.

With a sigh, he slouches down next to Nagi and stares at the blank wall in front of them.

“I can’t believe I lost control like that.” The witnesses concerned him more than anything. The idea of him being known as a violent person to the public is starting to haunt him now that he was in the process of dealing with the aftermath.

While he was still focused on his game, Nagi didn’t let the conversation end.

“Seemed like he lost control too, maybe he had an off day or something.”

Isagi briefly wonders about where Nagi’s stance was regarding the difficult actor. Nagi didn’t have that many scenes with Rin, so they didn’t share that many interactions together. Even more so, Rin never really seems to have any scathing comments toward the guy. 

Nagi, surprisingly, turned out to be a good actor. No longer did he look disinterested or apathetic when the cameras were on him, but instead there was this feeling of determination that he gives off when he plays his role. While the personality differences between his character and himself didn’t seem to be so far-fetched, at least that’s what Isagi thinks, it seemed as though he was able to adjust appropriately with the character, knowing what their thoughts and emotions must be for a given scene, even when not provided by the writers of that character.

Isagi ends up mumbling his response under his breath. “Seems like he always has an off day when it’s our scene though.”

“Well, today was especially bad, but I don’t know what his problem is with you. He is generally all-around not great to work with but is extra nitpicky on you.”

He sighs as he buries his head in between his hands, thoroughly exhausted for the day.

“Beats me.”

They sat in silence for the next while, Nagi as attentive as ever to his game while Isagi was completely zoned out with empty thoughts in his head.

He thought of nothing and felt nothing.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

“Want me to start it now?”

“In a second, let me go get the laptop really quick!”

Bachira had sped out of the room before coming back in with the retrieved item in his hands. Isagi makes himself comfortable on the small couch and reaches over to grab the smartphone that was issued for when they did impromptu live streams like these.

While some live streams were planned beforehand, the others were more spontaneous, started by any member whenever they really feel like doing it. The atmosphere was certainly more informal, and Isagi finds that there was a closer connection with the fans that tune in. Smaller audience sizes went hand-in-hand with more interactions, there were even times that Isagi had the chance to have conversations with fans that were sustained by genuine interest on both sides. All in all, it was one of the tasks of being an idol that Isagi liked to do.

“Okay, I’m starting it now,” Isagi announced once Bachira looked prepared next to him.

Within a minute of tapping the start live stream link on the streaming app, he watched as thousands of viewers began to join. Alongside the rapidly growing viewership, comments started showing in the chat, most stating a simple greeting, with many being in Japanese, some in English, and a few in other languages as well.

Upon reading the comments, both Isagi and Bachira started waving and returning the greetings to some of the usernames they had read out.

“Good evening to our fans and viewers! How has everyone’s day been?” Bachira begins.

Among the many comments that came flooding in, Isagi quickly picks a few to mention.

“Congratulations to Chi-chan for scoring the highest mark on her math test! If I’m not wrong, I think you talked about struggling in math before and I’m so happy to hear that you got to improve by so much!”

“Go Chi-chan!” Bachira does a quick mini-clap.

Isagi continues. “And good luck to Liz who has their language test tomorrow! They said that they are studying while watching our stream, which I hope won’t be too distracting because it’s important to study well!”

They spent a few more minutes addressing a handful of the thousand comments that had poured in. He doesn’t have a strict process of selecting which comments to read but oftentimes he does try to balance between giving positive shout-outs and giving more typical responses that lead to short conversations.

After their small introduction, Bachira then directs them toward a different topic that was primarily the reason why they had started the stream in the first place.

“Who's excited about our next album!”

Judging by the rapid swarm of responses, the overwhelming majority of their viewers were highly anticipating their new album, which of course, made Isagi equally as excited.

“So we can’t share a lot about the songs we are working on, but Bachira and I are allowed to give a small sneak peek.” Isagi nods to Bachira as a signal that he was letting him go first before flipping the camera around so fans could see a snippet of the program that Bachira had opened on the laptop.

“Okay! For my song, I’m thinking of giving it a short but fun title, because it’s more of an upbeat song that makes you want to groove out—I intentionally created it so you had no choice but to wanna dance when you hear it!”

“Yes, his song makes you want to move along with the beat no matter what.”

Bachira then plays small parts of the song that showcased a bit of his vocals. He started with the chorus before pausing it to play a bit of the break that did represent the nature of the vibe that Bachira was going for.

“Doesn’t it sound like it’ll be a fun song? Anyways, before I expose too much, it’s Isagi’s turn now!”

Upon the notice, Isagi switched the camera back so now they were both center framed again. “I don’t quite have the right sound for my song yet, so I don’t really have anything for you all to listen to, but I do have a vision for the song.”

Bachira leans in a bit closer to Isagi all the while keeping his eyes trained on the phone screen. “His song is kind of depressing.”

Isagi gives him a side-eye. “Okay so it might not be as fun and light-hearted as yours, but I am thinking of making it sound upbeat as well.”

“Right, you said you basically wanted a song that sounded fun but actually had some sad lyrics.”

He nods his head. “I have my lyrics finished but I won’t read them out line by line, but I will say that the main theme of the song is really about our own selves as individuals, and our state of being, in a way.” Isagi then slightly raises one eyebrow, “I mean hopefully, our fans will be able to find their own meaning behind the lyrics, I know we always get many different interpretations and I think all of them are equally valid.”

Isagi really meant what he said. The most beautiful thing about language is that it can always be construed to have a different meaning depending on the lives people have led. Different experiences of education, depths of knowledge, life moments, and possession of beliefs, are among the many influences that affect how someone can find meaning behind words that had been crafted together by someone else.

“So yeah, I am keeping it pretty vague for now! I probably seem like I am not the serious or mature type who thinks about things deeply but maybe my song will give fans a different outlook of me.”

“Wow, I think it’s kind of hard to imagine you as serious or mature though.”

Knowing that he means well, Isagi playfully shoved Bachira. “It’s not like you are either! In fact, in our group, you’re probably the biggest goof, like a lot more severe than me.”

Bachira laughs in response before hugging him from the side. He presses his cheeks against Isagi’s and hugs him even tighter. “I am the life of the party, what can I say?”

Isagi eyes the plentiful amount of comments that came pouring in, the volume definitely increasing by the second when compared to when the live stream had started.

They continued for the rest of the evening as so, moving on to other points of discussion and keeping fans entertained as it was business as usual. While Isagi was sure to appear as though he was fully attentive to the stream, the thought of his song and how he presented it still played in his mind.

It wasn’t as though he wanted to have the best song on the album, his other group members had been so steadfast in producing their individual songs that he was sure each fan will have their own favorites. But it was really the first time he was putting himself into a song. He participated in some songwriting for their previous releases, but it was never to this extent.

There was fear that was intertwined with his excitement about releasing his very own song. He feared that fans would be disappointed and that all of his work will be for nothing.

He does not portray himself to be such a sensitive person, but that doesn’t mean that he wasn’t. He’ll always smile and wave to the cameras, acting as if being happy and unbothered was just his way of life.

For the first time, with his song at least, an honest part of what it is like being in his heart and mind will be offered to the outside world.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

The day had Isagi feeling relatively hopeful. While he was on set today with Rin, they had separate scenes, which meant that Isagi didn’t have to be anywhere near that unpleasant being.

While he was waiting for them to start filming his parts, he found Nagi sitting at the back of the set and decided to join in with the gaming. With Nagi’s tips and pointers, he got surprisingly into the game and embarrassingly enough got so sucked in he forgot to pay attention to what was happening to his surroundings.

His attention only gets diverted from his screen when he hears numerous gasps and murmurs of surprise that came from the people situated around him. Sensing that something unusual was happening, he looks up and finds himself at a loss for words.

In all of his famed glory, Itoshi Sae was seen standing next to the director. The actor looked at the scene that was being filmed in front of him with an unconcealed disinterest.

When Rin, the star of the scene, had noticed his brother standing off to the side, he unexpectedly broke character by allowing his eyes to wander. Isagi was sure he caught something that was devastatingly close to hurt and maybe even suffering in the way that Rin had frozen himself, almost as if he was stuck in time.

“Cut!”

Slowly, but with a considerable amount of distance, people start to move towards the unfamiliar presence in the room.

A glare, not unlike the ones that Isagi often finds himself on the receiving end of, was directed towards Sae as Rin made his way towards his brother.

In a tone that was completely devoid of any kind of familial love, Rin skips any form of greeting and bites out a bitter-sounding question instead.

“What are you doing here?”

Indifferent from the treatment, Sae had simply crossed his arms and gave a look that seemed like he was judging Rin’s performance from the start.

“I see your acting has not changed. Uninspiring as always.”

By now, Rin was directly in front of his brother, towering slightly but still competing for dominance against Sae’s natural commanding aura.

“You haven’t grown at all, Rin. It’s quite disappointing.”

Isagi could see the semblance of Rin’s familiar anger trace its way along his features. He felt it already how this was not going to end nicely.

Before Rin could retaliate, Sae had already turned around, making no pause as he walked away. While he could very much catch up to the man and continue their confrontation, Isagi continued to watch in slight amazement as Rin stood in complete stillness, angry yet so vulnerable, the first time ever that he was able to detect such a raw feeling from him. It appeared as though the people around him didn’t know how to approach him and all hovered uselessly within his peripheral. Seeming as though he had enough of the awkwardness, Rin had stormed off in the opposite direction of his brother.

Almost as if he was possessed, Isagi found himself standing up. He exchanges an equally surprised look with Nagi before he takes off running after Rin. He was sure that the man could not have gotten far in such a short time frame, but on the downside, he didn’t know which path he could have taken. Isagi went and checked several empty rooms before turning back and figuring that Rin must have taken the exit that he saw on the way.

Once he was outside, Isagi quickly scanned the surroundings before he spotted Rin, about a block down where the street shops were lined up. Seeing as though the man was about to get into some kind of altercation with a presumably random person, Isagi rushed toward them. He slips through the growing crowd around them and without contemplating his actions, he grabs Rin’s arm and pulls him back, ceasing any attempts to sock anybody in the face with that clenched fist of his.

“Now is not the place,” Isagi said under his breath as he subtly motions to the people around them, some with their phone cameras already out and filming them.

Rin roughly yanks his arm back before he scowls at Isagi. “Why did you follow me out here?”

Isagi more or less gets the feeling he was not going to be thanked for stopping the man from ending up on the first pages of the tabloids. He then starts to internally question himself when his actions have finally caught up to him.

What was he doing? Who cares if Rin loses his temper on some random person in public and faces the consequences of it by dealing with whatever the media dumps on him?

“I…no, I thought I had to.”

Rin did not look appeased, and his expression soured even more when recognition began to snake its way through the people.

“Isn’t that Isagi?”

“Wait guys, that’s Isagi from LockedON!”

Realizing that Rin had probably never had to do damage control before, Isagi took the lead and quickly apologized to the person that was almost assaulted before grabbing Rin and making a move to head back to the filming studio, pushing past the people who had now decided that today was the day to have their moment with a celebrity.

“Isagi, is it true that you are dating Kaiser?”

“Can we get a photo with you?”

“Isagi, can you sign my shirt?”

It was media training that taught Isagi to keep his mouth shut but to still remain cordial by keeping a pleasant smile on his face as he more or less ignored their questions and passed out a quick apology when he had to reject their requests. Worried that some of the more persistent ones might follow them back, Isagi gave Rin a warning before he tightened his hold and practically ran for his life. When they were nearing the studio, the pair had to take a detour to the front doors which were the only ones that were unlocked. Once inside, Isagi quickly called for security to alert them of the people that were outside.

When the situation had somewhat calmed down, Isagi finally let go of Rin, who seemed a bit stunned by the experience of being chased by a group of strangers.

“You get used to it.”

Rin, once getting a hold of himself again, quickly switched on his look of frosty indifference.

“I never asked for your help. I could have handled whatever backlash that would have happened.”

Isagi narrowed his eyes at the man. “Right, because it is always easy to deal with a scandal about randomly assaulting people on the streets.”

“It wasn’t random, the guy made it his problem and I was just giving him what he deserved.”

This was something Isagi had heard before or rather, something he became well acquainted with. The reality is, sometimes doing what is fair or deserved, or maybe even right, was a line that was dangerous to cross.

Isagi sighs, clearly exasperated from having to deal with all situations involving Rin. “If you want to be a celebrity one day, you are going to have to learn how to smile with your ass on the line.”

He only then realizes that he had offended Rin when he tried to offer a tiny bit of his advice because the guy had looked more pissed off than ever.

“I don’t need your advice about being a celebrity. Why would I listen to whatever lukewarm wisdom you spit out?”

And then this was it. 

No more, from this day onward, will Isagi tolerate the horrendous mess that is Rin.

“What the fuck is your problem with me? What the fuck did I ever do to you?!”

Rin’s eyes had gleamed, casting a dangerous edge to his expression as though Isagi had awakened a monster from its sleep.

“You come here, acting all happy and giddy about being in your first movie when you didn’t even audition for it. No, you didn’t because you are some idol with crazed fans that are willing to dump out thousands of dollars because you sell yourself for them.”

The way Rin had described him and his career carried such filth and revolt. While Isagi’s skin crawled about being associated with the dirty image that Rin had conjured up, he thinks he understands for the first time the roots of Rin’s hatred towards him. As though he found the words to finish a story, the right pieces he was missing before had finally made themselves known and Isagi finally realizes what he didn’t before.

In an uncharacteristically calm approach, Isagi was sure he had an unsettling look on his face. “If people like what I do and are willing to support that, why wouldn’t I sell myself?”

“How ridiculous it is that you think that what you do actually has worth when you are just a manufactured carbon copy of others, easily replaceable and disposed of.”

Isagi was slowly cutting in close to Rin’s personal space as he gave the man his most chilling yet blankest expression. “But I am not a copy nor can anyone copy me. There is love in what I do, but you look like you never could understand what it means to love something, especially something you have preconceived notions of being beneath you.”

“You may be good at acting because of the natural skill you have, but you don’t love it. You are doing it to prove a point.”

He pauses for a brief second.

“Though it’s not like he will ever care.”

Without waiting for a response, Isagi turned around and headed back toward where he should have been, where he still had a spotlight to be under and people waiting for him.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

While it may seem like he was through with saving Rin from whatever trouble he gets himself in, that wasn’t quite the case when what he does next could be labeled as more of a foolish mistake than a heroic act.

But that was depending on which side would view it.

Word gets out that the cast and crew of Days of Blue were out having dinner together on an otherwise unexciting evening. They weren’t even celebrating anything, filming was not done and the movie was far from finished. It was just like one of those workplace dinners to build relationships or foster goodwill amongst the workers.  

No one had been formally accused but Isagi has guessed that one of the servers at the restaurant was a bit too excited to have them there.

Nevertheless, getting swarmed by paparazzi when they leave the restaurant felt like a typical Wednesday for Isagi, though he would understand if some of the greener folks were a bit more uncomfortable with the shouts and the shoving of cameras and microphones into their faces. Notably, Rin, but Isagi made it a point to avoid the man entirely during the whole dinner. If someone was never going to respect him, then Isagi would not have any intentions to keep them around.

Or so he thinks.

All at once and in a disorderly fashion, the star of the evening was inevitably Itoshi Rin who had his face plastered over social media for the first time when the clips of him from that day made rounds around the internet. There were of course some reporters that were gunning for the other cast members, and a few for Isagi as well. Since he was in a good mood that evening as dinner went well and the conversations were pleasant, he felt generous enough to chat up some of the nicer and familiar reporters he recognized.

Most of what he said had no real depth as there was a limit to what he could say about his ongoing projects, but Isagi mostly viewed it as engaging as small talk, providing content for reporters and for his fans.

He was going on, skimming the surface of what acting and his role has been like for him when his ear picked up on a set of questions that was addressed to the famed guest of the evening who was somewhere behind him.

“Itoshi Rin! Can you tell us where Sae has been?”

And then after that, there were rapid-fire rounds of desperation for new information regarding the actor that never seems to ever reveal anything about his personal life; an actor that hasn’t even confirmed he had a brother that was starring in a film that was going to be released a mere week after his own.

“What are Sae’s plans for returning to Japan?”

“Rin can you tell us why did Sae leave Japan?”

Isagi can only imagine what awful mood Rin must be in at the moment. He almost chuckles to himself when he has a picture in his mind of what scrunched-up disgusted expression has to be on Rin’s face.

He was going to let things be, the course of nature, as some would call it. But then he heard one particular question that sent the unpleasant emotions inside clawing their way through.

How does it feel to be living in your brother’s shadow?

Influence was such an incredible thing. It dictates the heart and mind, corrupting the actions of another. It comes in so quietly like it’s hiding in the background the whole time, only becoming a centerpiece when the right moment strikes. 

It was a scary feeling that had started to creep into him when he thought about the hold that Rin had over him. His perceptions and thoughts were horrifyingly beginning to be tinged by the man because Isagi had always been influenced by the greatest.

Isagi had claimed that Rin didn’t know how to love, but that didn’t mean he was unable to have feelings.

He knew this one reporter was dirty and liked to play dirty. Sensational titles coupled with offensive writing are all obtained from intrusive and foul means. This was where his media training would have helped him the most, and he knew that he was taught to avoid these ones.

But everything he knew became mere advice and not the strict rules he was meant to follow when Isagi remembered what he saw. When Sae was here on that day.

He went around and got in front of Rin, grinning viciously at the reporter that was an omen of disaster.

“I see you haven’t managed to get your niece famous, huh? I guess it must have been hard to find a sponsor for someone like her.”

The reporter quickly realized that Isagi was talking to him and it was like watching a man completely unravel into a childish rage when the words hit the spot he was aiming for. But Isagi ignores him and mutters under his breath to Rin to quickly get a move on. Cries of words that were meant to berate him became distant the further they got away. But he knew the worst was yet to come.

When Isagi saw Anri’s car waiting for him by the curb, he turned to Rin, bidding him an almost solemn farewell before he got into the car. He didn’t even bother to catch how he might be looking at him after what happened, what he did.

Once inside, he watched Anri craning her neck to look outside the passenger side window. She stared bewilderingly at Rin who had not made a single step to move.

“Uh?”

Isagi fastened his seatbelt, denoting that he was ready to go.

“There was a crowd when we left the restaurant.” He said instead.

Anri started the car, giving one last glance at Rin before pulling them away. “Right, okay,  that doesn’t seem too unusual.”

Isagi looked out the window, his terrible feelings exacerbated by the second.

“Tell Ego to get the team ready.”

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

J-STARS Daily

LOCKEDON ISAGI FACES SCRUTINY OVER PAST BEHAVIOR

The famous center from the popular boy group finds himself in hot water as photos and allegations surface

January 29, 2023

Questions regarding Isagi’s true personality have come to the public’s attention when a post was made online by a victim that claimed that Isagi was a former bully in middle school. While the poster had remained anonymous, they offered details that others have confirmed to be true, such as the school Isagi had gone to and his former homeroom. Photos were also uploaded which depict Isagi wearing what looks to be a middle school uniform and engaging in illicit activities such as underage drinking and smoking.

Following the post were several others that supported the claim that Isagi was a violent bully, the supporters had identified themselves to be former classmates and staff members that have worked with Isagi in the past.

While Isagi himself has not addressed the bullying accusations, Egoist Entertainment has told news outlets that the rumors were untrue and hurtful. They have denied the claims of Isagi being a bully and that the photos were edited.

Follow J-STARS on Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok for the latest news updates on your favorite Japanese celebrities!

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⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

When Ego calls for him, Isagi walks side by side with Anri to the man’s office in dead silence. The stressed and worried look on her face was not doing him any favors as he was equally unprepared for what to expect.

He was very not settled in when he entered the office and sat down in the chair facing his real boss, as some would bestow the title to.

With his knees up, Ego had spun around in his chair, eyes as dead as ever.

“The good news is that these kinds of scandals are easy to deal with and they’ll stop running articles about it in a day or so.”

Isagi nervously fidgets. “And?” he asks.

“Bad news is that the next thing they’ll write will be about the director kicking you out of Days of Blue.”

It hits Isagi with a full-on force that makes him blank out of reality, losing all the feelings and sensations he had right up to that moment, his body somewhere else.

“As of today, you will no longer be part of that movie.”

Chapter Text

IV. February - April 2023

What comes easily to others is naturally a convoluted and complicated mess for Rin.

A simple ‘hello’ more often than not lends itself to a rather straightforward conversation about how a day might be going, or if there were new updates that one would be willing to share. The parties involved might find some kind of solace in this kind of small talk and they function as a means to sustain friendly relations. They help perpetuate the social niceties most were raised to accept unconditionally.

However, he finds these kinds of interactions meaningless and shallow. Rin did not maintain relationships with people because he found no use for them; in all of his sincerity, there was no such need he had ever felt.

The only purpose of his life was to be better than his brother. Without any deceitful or underhanded means, Rin was going to force fate to play his hand, he was going to be at the top and that was his promise, to himself and to the world.

He had always been unrelenting in his pursuit. But lately, questions had been gnawing at him.

What comes after? What was he supposed to feel when it was over?

His world had always been unforgivingly tainted by Sae. His brother’s influence was a parasite on him, stuck and immovable, doing more harm than good. It was his brother’s words that made him aware of the hierarchies in life. There’s a reason why there are those that are beneath us. Those words became his heart, when he was young and wanted to be like his brother, and when he was older and he wanted to be better than his brother.

When Sae had left, that decision was the key that permanently locked in the changes Rin had begun to notice in his older sibling. No longer did he greet Rin with some show of warmth when he would come home. No longer would he hold his small hands when they went out together. No longer would he play along with Rin with their once-usual pretend shows with the scripts that Sae would get from work.

And it was devastating. All of it, from start to end. Before he felt as though it would be too late, he was a little boy that tried to fight for his brother, to tear down the new unwelcoming person that decided to make themselves home, a place they had once treasured together. But he was still a kid, only becoming more of a nuisance than anything; really what was he supposed to know that would have helped to succeed in his undertaking? His brother was long gone and the reality was that he didn’t know him at all.

For a while, he had been too busy to consider his brother’s sudden reappearance. Ever since that whole mess that caused the production crew to refilm a sizable portion of the movie, Rin had become so busy that he even momentarily forgot that Sae had shown up one day. Instead of remembering his brother when he comes to set, there was something else plaguing his thoughts.

They were shooting a scene where Jirou was being comforted by Aoi after having his manuscript for a novel he wrote, rejected for the first time. It was a part where Jirou was on the verge of slipping back into his depression, a show of the once familiar sense of loss that haunted him at the beginning of the film.

The new actor that was playing Aoi was taller, and a bit stockier. Their features were less eye-catching and a bit dull. Their eyes did not shine as bright and their smiles were not that pretty. When he had lightly embraced him, a horrifying idea had begun to poison him.

How would it have felt if this was Isagi instead?

It was shocking to have that thought cross his mind and it brewed a whole catastrophe of emotions within him. He didn’t dare to think about that man since the day he was unceremoniously kicked out of the project. At the time, he saw it as a true blessing—no more would he have to be involved with that annoying presence he often detest.

But there were these rare moments where he becomes confronted with these thoughts that appear out of nowhere and do nothing but leave him feeling terrible. He didn’t want to think about Isagi, but he was all but a victim of his own whims.

When the director had ended the scene, he went on as usual, pretending as though he wasn’t a disaster inside as he went and reviewed how the camera had captured him, making sure it was of the best quality.

“You know, it’s a bit easier to talk to you now.” The director had said out of the blue.

Rin didn’t know what would have been an appropriate response and had stayed in his usual character by keeping quiet. He didn’t want to think about where the director might be coming from by offering those words.

“I don’t know if it’s because we have spent more time together, or the, ahem, changes that have happened, but you’re slightly less intimidating. I can see it in your acting as well.”

This was news to him. He didn’t think that he was doing anything different.

“I doubt that I have changed much, but if I did, it’s not because it was what I intended.”

He was being difficult, but the director always knew how to handle him. He gets a small grin and nothing else was said as they move on to review the scene, business as usual.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

When Rin returns to his parent’s house for the first time in about a year, it was more of a filial obligation than anything else. They are courteous to one another, if not stiffly awkward in their interactions. He knows his parents are scared of him, they never really got a handle on managing their youngest. Instead of confronting him and disciplining him during his worst moments, they shied away, choosing to let him be, to work out his anger in his own way.

It was nearing the evening when his mother had finished preparing dinner, timed perfectly for the moment his father had come home from his work. If not for their children, they would have seemed like any other ordinary home. A happy wife and husband who fulfill their duties and who meets the needs of each other.

At the table, it was silent, which was how most meals in their household went. They all ate quietly, politely, as prim and proper as the other Itoshi’s in their family line before them. Rin feigned ignorance, knowing how his parent’s occasional glances towards him burned with a fervent need to know.

It was his mother who built the courage to dispel the silence that had settled over them.

“How did the filming go?”

He did not look up, simply waiting for the moment when his mouth was empty to give a reply before continuing to eat.

“Fine.”

His parents share a glance and they leave it at that. There was nothing more that had to be said.

Rin was the first to excuse himself the moment he was finished. He could not care for whatever conversation his parents started to have the second he was gone. The only thing that was of importance to him was to go over the scripts his agency had sent over.

There were plenty of dramas and films that were in the pre-production stages that were looking for a cast of characters to fill. He was skimming over the titles, figuring a drama series would be his next work at hand. Rin had always been an extremely nit-picky person, one little detail was enough to make him abandon the project if it was something he did not like. As he pours over the scripts, there were already several he would not bother. Characters with no substance, no clear structure to their motives, and a storyline splattered with decisions he does not agree with.

Nothing had piqued his interest until something unusual had shown up.

Tucked in between the scripts for the various drama series was one for a music video.

It was one of those longer music videos, rather than just playing the song, there were scenes interspersed that helped to carry a narrative. From reading the script and lyrics of the actual song, the writing seemed personal, like the author was trying to express a story of themselves, but because of the intentional vulnerability that Rin can see in the writing, it would seem uncharacteristic for them. There was a certain quality to it all that gave him a sense of desolation yet it was paired with a contrast of inspiration.

For this particular music video, instead of featuring the artist, they were looking for an actor to play the role the writer had in mind—an actor that would be able to understand what meaning the writer was hoping to convey and broadcast that to the larger audience.

His heart stills when he eyes the name responsible for the script in front of him. In glaring unmistaken print rested a name that seems to refuse to ever disappear from his life.

Isagi Yoichi (LockedON)

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

There was one memory that had always come so vividly for him. A firm reminder of his past, a part of him that he would never be able to let go. He may not always remember it as part of his day to day, but it always comes back to him, a connection tethering him to the graves that he was always running away from.

Reading out parts, playing the role of someone else that wasn’t him, there was almost a sort of magical wonder towards acting he felt when he was a kid. He had already experienced several different roles before he was out of the elementary grades, and his first major role was in a play put on by the fourth graders at his school.

He can remember that it had been a time of elation, practicing, and perfecting lines with his brother. Rin had the lead role, and he knew that when it came to the big day, he was the best one on that stage because of his brother’s help.

He had been a prince, an absolute darling for the crowd. He had amazed his teacher, memorizing his lines from the first day, and inspiring his fellow classmates to do the same. Perhaps it was partly the character he had, but Rin had the air of the refined person that served as the Itoshi ideal.

After the play, that was when he heard applause for the first time; applause for him. As a child, it had struck something within him, a place inside that was resting comfortably next to his beloved brother.

He had sprung himself off the stage and ran towards his family that was waiting for him in the audience. They were never huggers, but he became an honest child for that moment, overcome with emotions as he jumped at his brother, forcing a hug upon him. And Sae had let it slide then, just for that one time.

“That was the best I’ve ever seen you.”

Sae was the one who had lit the stars in his eyes before Rin would have been the one to kill them.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

Birthdays, of course, have become nothing more than another meaningless date. Though to the world, they are these monumental events that some put in an absurd amount of effort to celebrate. To them, there was some kind of specialness about a day that comes once a year. Like it was a moment they had to seize before it got away from them.

On the first day of April, Rin could not go anywhere without seeing some poster or sign that had been plastered with Isagi’s face.

He learns—unwillingly—that today was the man’s birthday.

It’s a bit ridiculous after a while, seeing the same face over and over with the same message that would only be valid for the next couple of hours or so. It was only one day, yet the whole world seems to be enamored and excited about parading it around as if he was the most special person in their lives. He imagines they would not do something on this scale for someone a bit closer to them in terms of social relationships, like a family member or even a friend.

He had only been out to run his typical errands but he instead gets greeted with an almost interesting show of the effects of parasocial interactions. At least a dozen strangers, most likely fans, were out pointing at the signs, cheerfully laughing, and taking pictures next to them. He then saw others, mocking the pictures and making a joke about them with their following group of friends. Though this did not go unnoticed by other people. From his observations, it had seemed as though the number of fans Isagi had far outweighed anything else. There are more people out there that would save him as opposed to letting him drown and abandoning him—though the lifespan of this kind of relationship leaves a lot less to be desired.

He watches as a group of teen girls off to the side, eyeing the group of individuals who were ridiculing the signs. It was immature and naive behavior, people acting out because there was unhappiness in their lives that has yet to be resolved, so they seek attention in order to compensate.

“Should we go and say something? Like how rude or stupid they are being?”

A girl near the back stepped up, shaking their head. “Remember how Isagi said not to engage with people like that? I think we should listen to what he wants instead!”

And like dominoes, falling in tandem with one another, all of the other girls seemed to have remembered exactly what she was saying and nodded their heads in approval, walking away from the scene like it was the only true solution.

It was watching again as the world turns favor. Last week’s insidious creature is this week’s glamorous wonder. It’s a cycle that turns so quickly, manipulated by hands in shadows, forefront, and by the everyday—sometimes there is no way to catch a break before the world has already moved on. For several weeks, Rin felt as though he was stuck in limbo, a weird passage of time where he truly was not feeling like his regular self. He was uncertain, a bit ill about how he can sense himself shifting.

He had assumed that he would never have to think about Isagi again after he was thrown out in cold blood. It’s not like he felt guilty about the actor’s exit, but he did feel unsettled. Isagi had become this entity that he no longer regarded with distaste or some unreconciled burning hatred. 

But why?  

Isagi had done something so reckless, and idiotic, he had only had himself to blame for his actions. Did he really think he was helping Rin? Protecting him from being torn apart by the world? Unprovoked by some media outlet he had never cared for in the past, Rin had been targeted in order to generate buzz for some lowly written article. While no one would ever know what would have happened if it was Rin that had done or said anything to displease that reporter, he was certain that his image would not escape unscathed.

If Isagi was expecting some kind of favor from Rin, he had yet to hear anything. Furthermore, he has heard no word of some misleading narrative that Isagi had done what he did to save him, and part of him was expecting that to hit the news the next day after the incident. But no, there was nothing about him that entangled the two of them together anymore. In fact, if it weren’t for the media, Isagi would have almost entirely disappeared from his life. 

It was in this dreadful period that he did not know what to do. He did not owe Isagi anything, and he suspects Isagi didn’t want anything from him. But whether it was intentional or not, there was this start of a seed of interest in that idol, the once beloved star of Japan once again after the world grew tired of his scandal and the people who had a persistent will in defending him. There was a saying, more so a researched scientific finding, where increased exposure to something builds familiarity and potential affinity for it over time. Someone who does not listen to pop music may not have a favorite pop artist, but when asked to pick which one they like the best, there is a great chance they may pick the one they hear often on the radio, which they may have playing every day.

Every single day.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

The first performance of LockedON that Rin had ever seen was not too long after their debut. It had been when he was scouted to audition for a new agency at the time, Egoist Entertainment. 

He kept his options open, carefully analyzing which would be the best company that would help propel him to the position of being the top actor in the business. Egoist Entertainment had initially been an interesting one, brand new, yet it had this impression that they are entirely capable of delivering its great promises. He had almost been completely persuaded by Ego Jinpachi alone to join the agency—but the risk with a new company did not pass his analytical and scrutinizing eyes, it was simply a condition he could not overlook. However, he would always remember the man himself, a shell that tucked in this disturbed brilliance that made him seem knowledgeable about anything with those uncanny eyes of his.

During his first and only interview with the man, it was almost as if Ego had both the ability to read minds and to foresee the future with how convincing he was.

“If you join Egoist Entertainment it is a guarantee that you’ll be able to stand at the top with your brother.”

And Rin knew the man would deliver, but it wasn’t enough.

“I need to surpass my brother, not stand with him.”

Ego was unfazed. “Even with everything at your side, only you can determine that kind of event and its probability to occur or not.” He then leans back in his chair. “Though, having my hands on the next star that surpasses Itoshi Sae is an enticing motivator for me.”

“Tell me, what does Itoshi Sae have that you don’t? Why is it him at the top and not you?”

It is a long second that passes. The answer was not one that Rin rehearses often. Convinces himself often.

“The ability to change.”

It was unnerving how little that man’s expression shifted. It was like he wasn’t even human at times.

“The will to change comes from one’s truest motives.”

There was a knowing in his words like Ego had hit the spot he was exactly aiming for.

“Itoshi Rin, what exactly are your truest motives?”

It was a question Rin refuses to answer with his truest heart on display. Simply because it was childish, and it was one of the first instances he felt a bit shameful about how immature his endeavors are.

When Rin gets up and leaves, Ego makes no effort to stop him, nor does he bid him a formal farewell. They both knew the outcome of the interview and chose not to address it, saving their last words for another time.

While he was offered an escort to show him the exit, he deemed it unnecessary and went his own way. He chose a scenic route, a numbing agent for his senses. He wanted to empty his thoughts, the clawing feelings that always want to leave their mark on him. He wanted them gone.

He was going down one certain hallway when he heard loud music coming from one of the rooms on his left. With him going unnoticed, he took a look inside, realizing that it was one of those large rooms with floor-to-ceiling mirrors that dancers used to practice with.

There were five of them that he counted, several standing out with their bright hair colors and even bolder charisma. He watched as they continued to go through the dance that accompanied the song, their confidence indicating that the moves had been ingrained in their bodies from a considerable amount of practice. 

Despite the tiring choreography, they all still looked so happy, excitement evident in the air. When the members each had their own spotlight during the song, the others cheered them on. There was nothing else that could make such a perfect picture of teamwork, the perks of working towards a dream with others by your side.

And it left Rin feeling bitter. He thought of them as foolish, hopeless dreamers in a saturated market where only a small percentage ever make it. As of right now, Rin truly thought they didn’t stand out compared to other idol groups. The odds were against them and more likely than not would come a day when they will no longer smile and laugh while they sing and dance as they are now.

He left before the end of the song, believing that he had seen enough. He would leave those at the bottom to fend for themselves. He could not fathom that they would ever become a part of his life if he ever had the choice.

Irrelevant and indifferent, that was the way it should have been.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

Being brutally honest was often the most efficient way to get one’s thoughts across. There’s no dragging out the truth through useless words, no unintended accidents when the main idea gets misinterpreted. Clear, precise, and truthful, that was the kind of relationship Rin had with his manager.

They don’t see each other outside of work-related events and situations, which was the most ideal for him. His manager keeps him on track with his schedule, keeps all of his matters organized, and ensures that every one of his pursuits were purposeful.

He is not afraid to be judged and his manager is not afraid to judge. Therefore when he notifies them of the next projects that he wants to do, he braces himself for feedback and suggestions from an insightful and objective perspective.

“The drama series will be good, it will help further build your image after Days of Blue. Since you are going for a more mature appearance, the role that you are auditioning for helps you stay in that character for the public as well.”

“Though if you think you might want to reinvent your image after becoming an established actor, having some less serious and more laidback roles at the beginning might help. I believe there was a script for a dark comedy-drama that was also sent to you.”

It was an odd thing, thinking about the future and if he would ever change. Nobody knows what may become of them because of the unexpectedness of life and how humans age and grow. 

“I think it’s highly unlikely that’ll happen. I’ll stick with what I have chosen so far.”

His manager makes a contemplative sound. They were talking over the phone though it did not feel any different than if they were talking in person. Instead of meeting up, the remoteness of phone calls caters to that efficiency he so often desires.

“Alright, we’ll leave it at that for now. Were there any other projects that you were interested in? There’s still a few months before production starts for that drama series and it’ll be good to pick up as many projects as you can during this period.”

He suddenly felt tense, an unfamiliar nervousness. He tries to gather the best way to convey himself. After all, this was something that both parties could not have foreseen.

“The music video that was there,” he takes a deep breath.

“How would that fit in with everything?”

Chapter Text

V. April - May 2023

Two hands cupped together; A steady stream that escapes

Is this right? Was this ever right?

I want to hold on, please let me hold on

Two hands cupped together; There is nothing that escapes

In this image, he envisioned something that he wanted to come to life. It wasn’t profound, but it motivated him and gave him some much-needed inspiration. There was going to be a clear scene, of a lone figure, surrounded by a field of bright attractive wildflowers, but they were going to curl up, anxious and sad. And then the florals would be replaced, with a fading-out effect, of a new background that will slowly come into place. The figure was still devastatingly alone, sitting at a desk in a classroom that would appear loud and lively with the many groups of peers surrounding him.

But they are all in their own world, existing without much thought.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

It is not often that he would be given the chance to plan and create his own music video for a song he wrote. Of course, he wasn’t working alone, in this kind of discipline he may have ideas, but he didn’t have quite the amount of experience to pull it off on his own efforts. Thus provided to them by Ego was a director they had worked with before on previous music videos and a small production team to help keep things going.

He remembers, close to a year ago, when the whole idea was proposed. A big comeback, and of course their title track was going to be one shooting for the grand awards, but also there for the spotlight would be each of the member’s solo. A song they would write and produce, paired with a music video that was completely up to their own artistic freedoms.

On the general surface, Isagi genuinely believed it would be a fun project, he was always someone who liked receiving opportunities to get creative, to push his own mind to unleash and build. But then it became daunting, there were vague ideas that he danced around, but nothing he was able to concretely put together into something that would be awe-inspiring for others to look at. 

There was a document that he kept with his ideas since it was planned that the members would each be much more involved in their next comeback. He eventually settled on a theme and the main ideas he wanted to include in his work. It wasn’t a large budget they were given as it wasn’t supposed to be some big life project for them. It was more of a means to show their fans a different part of themselves in the way they choose to express whatever it is that they want to express.

For Bachira, it was the fun he saw in life, his ever-so-optimistic cheerfulness. For Hiori, it was remnants of his past, dispassionate and lost until he found his will to become someone who was more. For Kurona, it was how he saw himself to others, always willing to help others but holding a fear that it wouldn’t be enough. For Chigiri, it was the sudden loss, losing the ability to do something so natural, and what it means to gain it back.

Isagi had struggled with the line between expressing himself in a joyful way like Bachira, or in a more heart-rending way like Chigiri. There was also Hiori who chose to do something inspiring that had resonated with him, and Kurona who emphasized reality and the relationships we have with others.

All of his group mate’s individual works inspired him to create something that uniquely became his in the end.

A love song for his fans, an unopened gift for the world that he picked using guidance from his heart and rationality from his mind.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

The month leading up to their comeback was always a small storm, like a warning before the big one happens. There was much finalized but still more to do, as always really. The songs were completed, photo shoots were done, promotional activities planned, and the music video for their title track was already filmed, edited, and ready to be broadcasted. All that was left were the music videos for their solos, which the members all dealt with on their own time, but still following a general schedule so that no one was left behind. 

Any casting that was required for their projects was done mostly by the other staff members at their agency. It wasn’t as though they didn’t want to sit in with the director as they cast actors to fulfill the roles that they have created, but it was a timing and scheduling issue. There were way too many other events they had to full-heartedly attend, namely the practices. A non-negotiable that the members agreed with was to always be there for team practices unless one was sick (with visible proof) or they were experiencing a life-threatening emergency.

Nevertheless, Isagi needed a small cast of characters for his video. Most would be in the background, filling up the space when needed or used to create a certain atmosphere for each scene. However, there was one primary role that would get all of the screen time—his main character. He thought about it himself that maybe he should play the role, it was his own writing after all and he knew what his exact intentions were. But it was because he knew what his intentions were that he felt like it wouldn’t be enough, the limitations of what he could achieve with his acting would not be able to convey the feeling and expression he wants to portray to his audience.

He made sure to be explicitly clear in what he wanted to the director and the team in charge of casting and left it in their hands, completely trusting what they end up deciding.

Though it goes with a surprise, terrible or not when he sees who had been cast for the big role.

Seeing Rin’s name again felt like a slap to the face. It was incredibly harsh at first, but then it was almost as if the hand had reached out and soothed the area that it hit. Gentle, apologetic, reassuring him. And then after that, it filled him with an uncomfortable anxiety.

While writing and envisioning his project, he did, for a split second, think about the potential that Rin would have when he decided to go with a separate actor for the role. But it was a very brief moment and he crushed that thought just as quickly. He remembers how much of a pain it had been working with him and he couldn’t quite erase the conflicting relationship the two of them had shared, to put it in professional terms.

To think that for some reason, Rin would be the one to take the role in the end felt like a bizarre string of events. It made him nervous, unsure of where the other party might go with this. He asked those in charge of casting if they happened to know why or how Rin got the role. It was informed that Rin had voluntarily asked for the role and was simply the best among the others who wanted the same position. There was a thought that left him feeling a bit unhinged that Rin’s management had forced him into accepting the part. And Isagi hated it, if Rin didn’t want to be there then Isagi didn’t want him there. 

But he convinced himself that logically, it wouldn’t be fitting. Rin most likely wouldn’t gain as much as he would get from an actual movie or drama role. Therefore another reason must exist as to why Rin himself would choose to take part in something that has Isagi’s name plastered all over it, which normally would be like a plague the actor avoided.

He was sure to leave Rin alone after what happened. He convinced himself that he was happy with his decision to cut off any kind of communication with him, keeping their distance, as it should have been. 

Isagi had done all that, confident that period of his life would fade into memory and become nothing more. Though now, he thinks he understands what it is like being chased by his own past.

A past that he was actually involved in.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

“Are you feeling nervous? It’s okay if you don’t want to be here, Bachira and I can cover for you—we’ll watch how it goes and keep you updated if you would like.”

Isagi takes a deep breath, turning to Hiori attempting to give his dear leader a convincing smile.

“Thanks, but I think it would be best if I was there in person.” He really did appreciate what his group mates would do for him. After more or less detailing the critical points of his interactions with Rin, his group members were under the impression that the man was a plain asshole and that Isagi shouldn’t be around someone who was all negative and such. He did try to humanize their perception of him, mentioning that he had some sort of brother complex and that he seemed to not hold anyone close to him—basically antisocial behavior.

They were still of the opinion that it was a basic human courtesy to still be polite and respectful and that whatever terrible past he may have does not justify his current actions. It was all the standard talk, common sense that he was being drilled on, that all kids have been drilled on since grade school. He knew all of that though what is said in the books is not practiced in reality, and this is a case that was one shining example.

While they probably had sensed that Rin was involved because of the pictures that were released from that day, his group mates did not know the detailed events that led to those weeks when Isagi was being dragged through the dirt by the media. He knew that if the others knew, they would have gone ballistic over his idiotic and nonsensical actions.

Isagi had suffered, losing his role in the movie had hit him and their group hard. He was mocked and berated online, but really the worst part was that people had begun to doubt him. He was not who he really says he is, he was not one they all had fallen in love with, he was nothing but a sham. Hate comments were not new to him, but that didn’t mean that he was immune.

Fame is like walking on a tightrope. With enough practice, maintaining a public image could come a bit easier. But there’s always a chance that something unexpected could tip one over, plunging them toward the depths.

Part of him was terrified of seeing Rin again because that horrible period where he had gone through was so deeply associated with Rin in his mind that it was natural instinct that warning sounds were blaring off.

He couldn’t relax, or find any inner peace at all when he walked onto the set where everyone on board for his project was meeting. Bachira and Hiori were flanked at his sides, tucked in closely to comfort him as much as they could in this situation.

It was out of his own control when the first thing he did was scan the group of people that were already there for that familiar tall dark figure. When he found him, his heart had stopped, a surreal feeling hitting him that he was really here, in the present, with him.

When it became known that Isagi had entered, the others began to notice, and the greetings started. That was when Rin had been alerted, turning his attention onto him, holding his gaze, and refusing to look away.

He hears Hiori take in a breath and Bachira leans in closely to whisper something.

“He is kind of intimidating, this pressure is intense.”

Rin does not move, but it’s Isagi who inches closer and closer to him—a minuscule increment at a time. The three of them stop in front of the director, making small pleasantries. They go over the plan for today and the mundane of it calms him for a second before he is rattled by nerves again.

“Oh yes, I’m sure you have been acquainted with Itoshi Rin, but it might be good to go over your ideas and expectations with him if you haven’t before we start shooting,”

He hasn’t. And he is dreading it but he plasters on a smile of goodwill towards the director and says he will do just that. He looks at his entourage, informing them that it was going to happen now, a confrontation that he had been constantly imagining in his mind until the day it had become reality. 

When Rin sees him coming, he makes himself free but the expression on his face remains neutral, a look that he wears often. It was perhaps that vague sense of familiarity that he tries to latch onto, that this wasn’t new, this was something he was used to.

Internally, Isagi builds himself up as much as he can. When they are finally face-to-face, they stand at a respectable distance from each other, something that both sides maintain.

“It’s been a while.” It’s the only greeting he offers, and the only response he gets is a nod. He gives a quick glance to Hiori and Bachira to gauge their first impressions of the man. It was almost a funny sight to see them a bit entranced by Rin’s cold but beautiful looks. He wonders if the first thought that crosses their minds is that he does indeed bear that resemblance to the other Itoshi that they recognize all too well.

It was clearly him trying to please the man because Isagi knew that Rin only really talked about business during work time. So he wasted nothing more and got straight into it, giving a more in-depth explanation of what he wanted to see for today’s shoot. 

The mood should start off light, a bit cheery. The role Rin is playing is someone who is going about their life, appearing to be satisfied with who he is and where he is. Though difficult to capture, Isagi also wanted that hint of melancholy, something that didn’t quite belong to an ordinary picture of happiness. The smallest detail was to give a bit of a warning, that what happens next is not to be entirely unexpected, because the signs were there and you just had to be close enough to catch them.

Rin had been silent during his monologue, but Isagi could tell that he was paying attention as that was how Rin is towards his work. Seriousness and a dedication to being the best. This time shouldn’t be any different but the intense way Rin had been staring at him made him feel a bit flustered, praying that he looked just as perfect as the man across from him was, not a single strand of hair astray.

He clears his throat. “Do you have any questions?”

“No.” And that was all before the director broadcasted that filming would start. They said nothing else to each other before Rin headed off, ready to begin. 

“Well isn’t he a talkative person?” Bachira offhandedly commented.

Isagi shrugs. “Better than when he goes off with his criticisms and complaints.”

“At least he is nice to look at,” Hiori offers.

Bachira pouts. “Okay but, based on your stories about him I was ready to go all in and attack him too.”

“I think we should be glad that didn’t happen.” He gestures that he was going to take his place next to the director as everyone else around gets ready.

And then it begins, the first breath of life given to his ideas, the still images he had seared into his mind, finally taking movement. The shot has Rin sitting on seats that were replicated to look like train seats. The backdrop was artfully created to resemble a train, with his back to the typical large windows that trains have. With editing and effects, the scene would look as realistic as possible, even magical because there was going to be an earthly appeal. Different flowers would be sprinkled around, growing out of place but not entirely mismatched. It was a stand-off between the manmade and nature, all made to complement the lone figure in the center.

Rin had a content look on his face as he gazed out the window. His posture is relaxed, his body at rest. Even though there was nothing to look at, Isagi tries to picture what Rin was picturing, an outdoor view of various skyscrapers passing by, city life bustling, and a world of liveliness. There’s a smile that plays on his lips, but a careful look would see a blankness in his eyes and a slight twitch that renders the smile twisted.

He thinks his heart stops before he feels a thrill flood him.

It was like a shared vision had personally connected them both together. Complete perfection, that was what it was.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

The day had worked out well, they managed to get a majority of what they planned for finished and they were packing up for the next day where they would film at a different location. As weather permits, it would be an outdoor shoot.

This was when Isagi would part ways, the work day was over and it was time to head home. However, there was something that lingered in his mind, a pressing need to act on it.

Rin had gone to change out of the outfit had worn for the scene that they just had finished. His two companions had left halfway through when they realized that nothing too bad would happen but they warned him to avoid any provocation by ceasing all kinds of unnecessary engagement.

It was a fair warning, but Isagi was still someone who was weak to his own selfishness, someone who acted on his own impulsiveness when his threads of control had been cut.

He waited patiently, though it wasn’t as though Rin was taking his time and was out pretty quickly. This time, he doesn’t see Isagi coming towards him and is momentarily taken by surprise when Isagi makes his presence known.

“Do you want to get something to eat with me?”

Courage was something he had to seize, grabbing a hold of it in order to take the brave leap across. He was emboldened by his actions but there was still an anxiousness that made him a bit sick. Getting rejected was a wound that opened other wounds, a kind of damage that leaves a painful reminder.

Isagi had braced himself, falsely believing that he had a strong wall of defense prepared for the worst. But it was Rin’s singular response that had knocked it all down, though instead of devastation it left behind a beaming hope inside of him.

“Sure.”

He brightens considerably, but he is conscious, careful not to upset this newfound balance between them. Instead, he springs upon him a suggestion he felt would be agreeable, a place not too far from here that is respectful towards celebrities and has a no-tolerance policy for guests bothering celebrities that choose to dine there. It was a casual place, which is usually the best option to keep the atmosphere lighthearted.

Rin agrees with his choice and little by little, his nervousness titters more towards excitement. There is not a complete sense of comfort between them, but Isagi was okay with that. Time was all they needed.

He decidedly fills the space between with idle chatter. He talks about his favorite thing to get from the place they were heading to, but then he ponders about what he might get this time around, feeling like trying something new. He brings up how tomorrow was going to be an outdoor shoot, but he keeps the talk about work minimal. It was not the right moment to bring up what he really wants.

Rin contributes little, acknowledging that he was listening, but he wasn’t rude and he didn’t lash out with the negative remarks that Isagi secretly still feared.

When they are at the restaurant, the staff greets Isagi out of familiarity and they seat them at a table that was tucked in the corner. Hidden but not forgotten, the most ideal for when he is out in public and wants to be treated more as a plain civilian.

It is when they both have put in their order that Isagi decides now was the most opportune time. They were both seated, at ease (well at least he was), though they were still a bit awkward with each other.

“Is there a reason why you picked to do this music video?”

Rin always sat up so straight, his posture so rigid yet regal. It was probably the confidence that inevitably came from such composure that made many intimidated. But Isagi faced him head-on, he was going to be seen as an equal to him.

“Is there a reason why you provoked that reporter?”

Rin’s question to his question played too much like a game to him, but it was this particular situation that made Isagi unsure of what it would mean to lose.

“It’s nothing dramatic. Maybe I was jealous and wanted the spotlight on me instead. After all, there’s no such thing as bad publicity.”

Cyan eyes narrow at his response. “I know that’s not it. Anyone could tell that you would not risk your good image for something so shallow.”

Isagi laces his fingers together and sits up a bit straighter. He lets a smile take form on his lips, its purpose meant to be more positive than anything else. He wanted to make Rin feel like he could be a genuine friend to him.

“It makes me kind of happy that you hold me up to a certain standard. All this time I really thought you saw me as some kind of lowlife, like someone who was below you.”

Rin does not break eye contact as he utters his next few words. “I did see you as someone who was below me though.”

Isagi leans in a bit. “And now?”

This time, Rin does look away for a brief second.

“I’m not sure.”

Isagi relaxes back in his seat, propping his arm up to rest his face in the palm of his right hand. He turns a bit playful, which he can see alerting Rin.

“I guess it can take a bit to sway someone completely.”

Their food comes out soon after and it was in-between eating that Isagi continues their conversation, playing truce and hopefully offering an answer that would settle something within Rin.

“I did it because I didn’t want to see you suffer.”

Rin looked confused. His expression unmistakably asks, but why?

So he continues. “It didn’t feel right to me that someone would use your brother like that against you, no matter how annoying or just plain terrible you were to me.”

“Really, it was me standing up to my own beliefs, whether you accept that or not.”

Rin taps his finger against the table. 

“And you are claiming that you are someone who upholds these kinds of heroic ideals.”

“Partly, but there was another factor that is kind of embarrassing to admit out loud to someone else.”

A deep breath was taken in and readied himself for the next part he says.

“Despite the incidents that happened on set, I never once truly hated you. You made me incredibly angry at times, and your words did hurt me, but I could never hate you.”

He continues. “There is just something about you that I couldn’t quite give up on, whether it was your approval of me, or something else, I don’t know.”

A pause takes place as it seemed as though Rin was deeply considering what his response should be. Isagi could not tell at all how his explanation was being received by the man and wondered what kind of inner debate was transpiring inside of the actor’s mind.

“I am the same.”

Isagi’s head tilts slightly, not sure about which part he was referring to.

“There are things I don’t understand. I don’t know why they are happening to me, but I know it’s somehow related to you.”

“You can take that as my answer to why I took on the role.”

Rin’s response was cryptic, hinting at something yet revealing nothing. Isagi tries to piece together the meaning of the string of words that were offered. It wasn’t plain happiness nor did he feel flattered when he understood that he had somehow intruded on Rin’s thoughts which ended up making the man confused. It was an odd feeling he gets, he feels a bit lost, not sure how to address Rin’s concerns.

“Whether it’s reassuring or not, I’m not going to change how I am towards you.”

He looks at Rin directly in the eyes, holding a strong confident stare.

“Hopefully you’ll figure it out, what it is that you don’t understand.”

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

The kind of attitude that Rin had been showing towards him had not changed after the first time they went out to eat. Which honestly had been a pleasant surprise, he had assumed it was a momentary phase, a peaceful truce that had sprung between them after the initial reencounter. However, it kept on, building into a small quiet relationship that they developed over the few days of working together—which entailed a whole list of things actually, from taking breaks and sharing meals in each other’s company.

Though when they are together, most of what they converse about, or work on, was related to the project at hand. After all, both parties were intent on ensuring that everything was of the highest standard. Most often not, Isagi would be rewatching playbacks with Rin, sometimes telling him what he imagines for what the final would look like after being edited. The dreamlike imagery he wanted, a surreal enchanting reality, yet still sobering as evidenced by Rin’s capture of the character.

Isagi initially thought that his plans for the music video were foolproof, but it was like Rin’s mind was a spinning wheel, always in motion, always at work constructing and deconstructing different ideas. The most significant change was that Rin was no longer demanding that his ideas were the only choice and offered them as suggestions. In the time span since he was last on the set of Days of Blue, Rin, for the lack of a better term, had become more willing, and easier to work with.

It is something to note that the way he does word these suggestions was still a bit one-sided, where there was a subtle pressure to conform to his ideals. 

“If you want to make this part more carefree and vibrant, you should change the lighting to this.”

“This clashes with the set design. I would get rid of it.”

“The character’s actions don’t complement the lyrics playing here. They should be doing something else instead.”

The changes Rin offers were mostly agreeable to Isagi and he was not reluctant to accept the man’s input. It wasn’t everything that was suggested that he implemented though it was a considerable handful that was, and it was a pleasant surprise that Rin didn’t become negative when some of his ideas were rejected.

It felt like a wonder, to establish this kind of friendly working relationship with someone that once couldn’t tolerate his simple presence in the same room.

On the last day after spending close to a week together, the general mood and vibe among the staff was more joyful and cheerful than anything. All of the filmings had gone smoothly, everyone had worked hard, and despite how cliche it was, their efforts had truly paid off. Isagi couldn’t have been happier to have worked with this small team of people who gave it their all to make something of his come to life.

He was going over with both Rin and the director on their latest playback. Isagi had been so deeply absorbed in checking and analyzing all the details the shot had captured that he was half frightened when someone whispered into his ear.

“Yoichi.”

When he whipped his head around, he became greeted with a familiar icy blue stare, delicately framed with red eyeliner.

Kaiser’s tattooed hand reached out and gently but firmly gripped Isagi’s chin, surrendering him in place. Isagi was entirely too surprised by his sudden appearance to fully comprehend the scene that plays out around them. He stared wide-eyed at the equally surprised looks everyone directed toward them. When he looked at Rin, it all had become too awkward for him, like his silent stare was judging him immensely. 

He jerked out of Kaiser’s hold. “I didn’t know that you were coming today.”

It was quite the signature smirk that Kaiser always wears on his face. “I can’t just drop by and see how my companion is doing? I even brought refreshments for your crew because I happened to hear it was your last day.” The German actor gestures towards a table neatly organized with an assortment of finger foods and pastries.

Isagi stares dumbfounded at the unexpected gift that was bestowed on them. 

“Oh, thank you, you really didn’t have to though.” Once he collects himself, he flashes a smile that nobody except Kaiser could tell that it was forced. “Your presence was more than enough.”

He could tell that Kaiser was thoroughly entertained by the situation he forced Isagi into, but he was also one not to be easily swayed by the other man’s schemes. “I would love to show you around, but I’m afraid I am too busy to keep you company at the moment.”

Kaiser reached out again, but this time he let his hand linger at the small of his back. “Not to worry my dear Yoichi, I am more than happy to quietly observe what wonderful work you are in the middle of creating.”

He felt exasperated. Kaiser was always pushing to be a clear distraction and he really needed complete focus from everyone, especially since they were so close to the end. Isagi didn’t know which cards to play in order to get the man to leave. He was most definitely trying to avoid coming off as rude and simply dismissing the man after he so graciously bought them enough food to compensate for their meals of the day. Additionally, they currently hold a public image of being “close” with one another, and his public relations team would have his neck if rumors started to leak of the two of them not upholding this “closeness”.

“Thank you for being so understanding, I will try to make your visit as worthwhile as I can.” This time he smiles with his eyes and lets Kaiser keep his hold on him. Once he was sure that their relationship looked ideal on the surface, he urged everyone to get back to work before secretly prying the hands off and diving right back into his analysis of the clip he was viewing before the interruption.

He knows how to ignore Kaiser despite his unmistakable presence that was stuck to his side. He couldn’t say for sure that the director and Rin could do the same but they try to make it work, resuming the matter they were discussing.

It was twice that Isagi catches Rin looking at Kaiser. He wasn’t sure if Kaiser was trading looks using that condescending expression he puts on in front of other actors, but it was clear that the way Rin’s eyebrow was slightly furrowed indicated there was something akin to displeasure. This alerted Isagi and took it upon himself to discreetly keep an eye between the two, but he wasn't able to catch anything else, at least from what he saw.

When they were finished going over the recording, Isagi led a small debrief of what he wanted to see for one of the final scenes they would film. Rin moved away and positioned himself in front of the set they were using. 

It was the one meant to resemble a bedroom, one that he emphasized the importance of giving a personal feel. The bed sheets were a plain solid color, a sage green, a shade that he particularly liked for its earthliness. There was a bookshelf, where varying manga titles were lined up and organized neatly. Judging by which series were displayed, Isagi had hoped it would give careful analyzers a more complete picture of the character’s personality. 

The last defining feature of the room was the desk area. A collection of different prints were pasted on the wall in front of the desk, they were a mixture of both photos and small drawings of sceneries found in nature. A gallery of oceans, mountains, plants, and most importantly, the sky. A bright blue sky with curls of bright white clouds, a dark sky with a delicate crescent moon hung amongst glittering stars, and a pastel-colored sunset, prints that he handpicked himself. Altogether, they were meant to follow one of the main themes of the video. Separately, they were small pieces of a character meant to be displayed.

When the director alerts everyone that the cameras were rolling, Rin played his role exactly as scripted. He was seated on the desk, turning on a small lamp before opening his sketchbook and continuing on with a sketch that was previously worked on. There was a look of concentration on his face, yet it didn’t make the whole mood entirely too serious.

Isagi could always get fixated on watching Rin act in front of the cameras. Though this time he didn’t let himself get too carried away because of the notable thorn that was stuck on his side.

“So, what was your purpose for showing up today?”

Kaiser glances at him, looking as smug as ever.

“Can’t I just be a good friend who wants to support others?”

“You are only a good friend when you are gaining something out of it.” He states plainly.

Kaiser chuckles. “I was just thinking we haven’t seen each other in a while, haven’t really given much for people to talk about.”

Isagi gives him one of his most judgemental side eyes.

“No, it’s you that hasn’t given much for people to talk about. I have my comeback which gives me a reason to be a top headline soon.”

Kaiser raises his hands in surrender. “Perhaps I was not entirely honest.” He then raises a brow at Rin, too focused on finishing the scene that he pays no mind to the two of them.

“I wanted to personally meet your new beau.”

It shouldn’t have been that surprising to him, of course, there would be a trail that would follow him wherever he went. Still, he couldn’t quite catch himself at that moment.

“It seems there has been a change in opinions regarding your relationships with the recent stream of photos released online.” Kaiser flashes a sharpened grin. “I have competition now on who looks the best standing next to you.”

There was a pat on his shoulder, a saddened look that mocked him. “Don’t you forget about me now, Yoichi.”

And then Kaiser leaves, timed perfectly with the director’s call to stop the rolling cameras.

Nothing should have changed, nothing significantly should have happened from Kaiser’s entrance to his exit. Yet his words had stirred him, and he started imagining these pictures in his head, the pair the two of them would make.

The first thing Rin does when the cameras stop filming is look at Isagi. He doesn’t know why, maybe because the German actor was still on his mind and wanted to check on what he was doing if he was still latched onto Isagi’s side. If Rin did notice his absence, he makes no show of it. Instead, like routine, he walks off the set and towards them to review the footage.

They watched the parts that had just been captured, though Isagi felt as though he wasn’t completely there. Rin was solid beside him, yet all he could do was stare blankly at the screen in front of him.

“I think it looks good, we probably don’t have to re-do it. What do you think?”

His silence went on for a bit too long, puzzling both the director and Rin as they turned and looked at him.

“Oh, I agree.” He gives them a quick glance before turning back to the screen. “I don’t think anything needs to be changed.”

Accepting his response, the director then speaks up. “Alright, we’ll take a small break and film the last parts after.”

Isagi nods before he heads towards the table of food that Kaiser had unnecessarily bought. He was mindlessly picking away at one of the pastries he grabbed, startled when he heard Rin speak out from his side.

“I thought your relationship with him was just for show.” Rin reached over to pick up a plain croissant, looking at him with an expressionless face as he slowly ate it. “I didn’t know that you guys actually had something going on.”

Immediately, Isagi was hit with the need to make the truth known, to somehow justify something that he didn’t even know, or even needed to be justified. He felt a vehement need to deny any intimate tangles with Kaiser.

“It is, for show, I mean. There’s nothing else to our relationship besides me gaining more German fans and him gaining more Japanese fans.”

Rin stares at his half-eaten croissant.

“You make it look realistic, even I felt convinced. But it must be annoying having to stage a relationship with him.”

Isagi’s eyes widened. Was that some semblance of praise? That Isagi had a talent for faking his relationships for the public?

“Well, being around him is quite a pain because of who he is. But he isn’t that bad, at least sometimes he’s not.”

Rin scoffs. “It takes talent not to get fed up with him. I don’t know how you do it.”

He takes his first bite out of the pastry he grabbed, deciding it was a bit too sweet for his liking. “In the end, it is only a temporary mutual agreement.” He shrugs.

They leave the conversation at that and Isagi was perfectly fine with that.

In the company between two, time should be cherished as so.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

It was their last dinner together before they would go their separate ways. Isagi refers to it as the last one because, from a professional standpoint, they wouldn’t have anything else linking them after the project was over. Neither party had made a move to suggest they would want to exchange contact information, in case they wanted to keep at what relationship they were in the midst of building.

Isagi knew that if nothing else happened, then bit by bit, the results they have made so far would disintegrate and become nothing once again. He, an idol, who always gazed at the stars that were able to outshine him, and Rin, the ever so impersonal actor who keeps people at a distance.

Though it may seem Rin had always been resolute on things, Isagi prides himself on being a people person, someone who is able to read even the most complicated individuals once he spends some time with them. From when he was still on Days of Blue, he thought he had gained some idea of who Rin was, what he could be like under that cold front. He sensed a past history with his brother, figuring they must have been close at one point in order for Rin to develop such a painful hatred. Alongside that, Rin was a perfectionist, someone who lives without errors and mistakes in the work that they do. And the most pivotal of it all is Rin’s preference for loneliness when Isagi could tell that he doesn’t mind the company at all, granted that the company was able to match his pace and not just be a nuisance.

Isagi acknowledges that he had been a nuisance to him once. His mere presence annoyed Rin greatly, resulting in backlash from both sides. It seemed like an impossible task, bringing down the walls that existed between them.

But then it happened. Isagi had felt it for sure, and he never wanted to go back.

Their conversations were stagnant during the dinner, normally Isagi would make an effort to keep the flow going, but today, his mind was occupied. He was tormented by his indecisiveness, unsure whether it would be a good move for him, or if it would even work out.

There were a few moments Isagi had opened his mouth to say something, but lost confidence and brushed it off. The quizzical looks Rin shoots at him made sure that he made it obvious that he was hiding something.

Eventually, it was Rin that let out a string of words he had never before heard from the man. An expression of worry that was so rare to catch.

“Are you okay?”

Out of all the most reasonable ways someone would respond to the common phrase, Isagi reacted differently.

It was sudden, how he was struck with a certain emotion. Want.

He wanted to have more of those moments—a participant—in the first experiences he shares with Rin alone. He didn’t want to face the end of it after today, there has to be something more.

“How do you feel about me?”

Rin looked like he was about to choke, but had smoothly caught himself before he let it turn into a big disaster.

“Where is this coming from?”

“You hated me before, and then you were unsure for a bit. What about now? Are you still unsure?”

And then Isagi was greeted with a sight he found filled his heart.

Rin’s cheeks were barely tinted pink, but it was there, Isagi saw it. His mouth was slightly agape, eyes enlarged by the tiniest of fractions. They were the smallest of details but it was still so incredible to him, how real it was and how it wasn’t just acting.

“I—”

Rin turns away, returning back with the usual expression that makes him seem emotionless.

“I still don’t know.”

Though his heart thudding in his chest, Isagi lets out his response with ease.

There’s an unmistakable happy look on his face, softness in its wake.

“Well, I guess I will need some more time then.”

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

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r/LockedON · Posted by u/yoichanily 2 hours ago

My analysis of “A Glimpse” by Isagi Yoichi

[Discussion]

**warning for the word wall

Starting off I think they made the perfect choice with Rin-san! I’m not sure if it was because of their friendship, but it’s cute if Isagi personally decided to cast his own friend for his music video! He really did fit the mood and vibe of the whole video and I guess we can see this as a preview of his acting for Days of Blue?!

Now moving on to the actual discussion at hand. In the opening shot, we see a discarded sketchbook in some field. I couldn’t tell at first what the sketch was supposed to be like, but I was reading some comments and some people have suggested that they are supposed to resemble buildings. I think that fits because of what happens later on in the video, which I would argue also relates to the next scene where we have (in my opinion) one of the best wallpaper-esque scenes where Rin’s character is sitting on top of a grassy cliff. There is a night sky behind him that illuminates his figure, though most of his facial features are still hidden in the darkness. But there’s this wonder in his eyes as he looks into some far distance that we can’t see. The meaning I saw behind this was how Isagi saw himself as becoming an idol. He had mentioned that one of the ideas behind his solo was based on how individuals see themselves and I think this plays into his own perceptions. The building we saw earlier is related to this part because there is another scene later on that kind of parallels it.

There was that shot on the top of a tall building where the character goes and sits at the ledge where they dangle their legs over. The emphasis on the sky backdrop is still there, but this time we get almost a sunset-like sky instead of the night sky in the first scene. From these parallels, I see it as representing Isagi later on in his idol career. He is still doing the same thing as shown through the similar positioning of him on the edge, looking at the sky, but the change in the background could mean how he himself has changed since when he first started off. I don’t have an explanation as to why he had specifically chosen those specific backgrounds, there could be some hidden meaning or it was simply for the aesthetics (or maybe both).

Another big thing to mention from the music video is the classroom scene. We see Rin’s character again and they are sitting at a desk in a classroom with large windows (it can be noted that the windows show a similar sunset sky from the part at the top of the building). The person is surrounded by others, all wearing the same school uniform, but it looks like no one makes the move to get near them as they are all absorbed in their own conversations. The person then gets up and exits the classroom and as they are going down the hallway, we see these signs and posters that start to show up on the walls. They say stuff like “fake”, “liar”, and “get out”. I might have missed some but I think those were the most important ones to draw attention to because I saw this as referencing the big scandal that happened to Isagi a few months ago where controversial photos were leaked online of when he was in middle school. The public had turned against him and it was trending for a bit that a lot of “fans” were petitioning to have him removed from the group because of how he was bringing down their image. Isagi never publicly spoke about how this incident had affected him but with this music video, we can see how isolated he must have felt. 

The way Rin acts in this scene makes the character appear shameful as well, which makes me think about how Isagi could have beaten himself over because he cares deeply about his group and how the scandal had negatively impacted them. I personally remember how haters would reupload old interview clips of Isagi talking about how he was going to do his best and make his group proud, and the haters would mock him saying how he only brought embarrassment instead :( 

But we see that he still loves what he does. There are lyrics in this part where Isagi sings “I want to hold on, please let me hold on.” Despite the pain and hardships he feels and goes through, he still has this love for his career and we can assume that he still sees himself being an idol, because that’s what he really wants.

Those were really the main ideas I wanted to discuss! Please feel free to debate them if you have different interpretations of the parts that I talked about. There was still a lot more to the music video I didn’t cover, but I think it more or less relates to Isagi’s idea of perception, both his own and others.

Tldr: A Glimpse is mainly about Isagi’s idol career, the changes he saw in himself from pursuing his dreams, and the changes others saw in him. It’s about the consequences of making your dreams a reality.

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Chapter Text

VI. July - September 2023

The Daily Tokyo News

LOCAL CAFE GOES VIRAL AFTER INSTAGRAM POST

A small family-owned cafe blew up in popularity after a visit from a popular idol

July 2023

Starting off as a small local cafe on the streets of Tokyo, SweetLemonie Cafe had seen a downturn in business after several years in operation. The business had begun as a big venture for the owner, Sakamoto-san, who always dreamt about opening their own cafe. Ran entirely by the Sakamoto family, they would go on to build a base of repeat customers, boasting a majority of positive reviews. However, competition has always been stiff regarding the survival of small businesses. Big-name corporations often have the means to turn larger profits, outcompeting with the undertaking of several expansions, nationally and internationally.

While it may all seem discouraging, the age of social media has created new means of effective marketing, especially with the help of established influencers and celebrities. The idol group LockedON has become a household name in the past year, recently nicknamed the award sweepers after their latest comeback sent them topping all the music charts and programs. Known for reigning the center position, Isagi is one of the group’s most popular members, holding the greatest number of brand deals and ambassador roles. 

Though Isagi is known for using his status for the good, made evident last Friday when he posted to his Instagram account about a visit to SweetLemonie Cafe. Holding nothing but praise for the kind owners and worthwhile menu items, Isagi’s post had propelled the business to newfound fame. It should be mentioned that the idol was not alone, as they had also posted a photo with Itoshi Rin at the cafe. The actor is known to keep a quiet social media presence, though they had recently grown a massive following after starring in a music video for a song written and sung by Isagi, as part of their latest comeback.

From their pivotal roles, the two celebrities have given new life to the Sakamoto’s family business. In a brief interview with Sakamoto-san, they mentioned how grateful they are for Isagi’s visit, and as quoted by the owner, 

“There is a new flood of customers every day now, and the problems we are facing are the fact that menu items keep selling out!”

The cafe’s top sellers are their handcrafted desserts, ranging from shortcakes to classic pudding. The drinks are also an unforgettable favorite, with their signature being their lemon-infused drinks. Those with an aversion towards citrus-flavored items should not fret because there are several other options available, including coffee and tea drinks made with sustainably sourced ingredients. Don’t forget to drop by SweetLemonie Cafe whenever you are visiting Tokyo! It will most definitely be a worthwhile experience.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

When someone starts to show you aspects of themselves that you were unaware of, there was this sense that you feel like they are actually taking the step to get closer to you, whether or not that was something you wanted.

At least when it comes to Rin, he would always want those steps in the distance between them to grow smaller.

It comes as a complete surprise to him one evening when they were already out after a typical meal together. The restaurant was newly established and Isagi simply had wanted to try it out and Rin had been willing enough to go along with his whims. He was starting to chip away at the dessert he ordered when Rin had spoken up about something out of the blue.

“You know, there’s a place nearby here that I used to go with Sae.”

He almost chokes hearing that name coming from Rin.

“What kind of place is it?” He asked, deeming it was the safest option.

“It’s a hidden lookout. It’s near a residential area so it tends to be quiet most of the time.” Rin turned his gaze for a brief moment, appearing as though he was looking at something but when Isagi tried to see what it was, he couldn’t quite figure it out.

“We used to go there, a place where we would practice reading scripts. Sometimes humoring each other with an unprepared play.”

It sounded heartfelt, like reminiscing a fond memory. But Rin’s features never once had softened, as though he looked back on his past like a monotonous routine.

“I want to see it.” The response caught Rin by surprise which then turned into a look of unwillingness. 

“The view there isn’t worthwhile. From an objective standpoint, it wasn’t really anything great.”

Isagi was adamant. “It doesn’t matter what it may be, objectively. Everything is objective until it becomes personal.”

Rin sighs. “I spent so long, living as though my brother never really existed. And in reality, it is the truth because he was absent for the majority of my life. But the fact that there are things that I remember, actual places that we spent time together, it makes everything seem distorted almost.”

“Did you hate him?”

“I did at the time.”

“And I did for the whole time he wasn’t here in the country. But then he came back and I feel like there’s still that part of me that stayed when I was young—a part that held him in high regard.”

There was a limit to the kind of advice Isagi would offer in situations like these, the ones that involve familial conflict that he truly had no part in interfering with. But when he personally cares for someone, it was just part of his nature to want them to feel better, to be in a better place. So what he says comes from his heart, an innermost belief he holds true.

“This is based on the few encounters I’ve had with your brother, including that day on set, but I think there’s a part of him that does miss you. The way he shows it is off-putting and not obvious, but there is a chance that you can rebuild your relationship. It’s up to you if you want to take that chance though.”

Rin shakes his head. “You are entirely too hopeful—anyone would have looked at that encounter and considered it to be a lost cause.”

Despite what Rin may believe, Isagi was resolute. He looked straight on with a firm look in his eyes. “I just think that communication may not be an Itoshi forte. But that’s okay because we can always be better. Always. ”

They share a small moment like this, looking into each other’s eyes. The intimacy of it was a bit embarrassing, something they were both getting used to, but he was convinced it’ll come along with time. Regardless, it was an important moment to be had, only ending when Isagi raises his hand to call for the bill.

When they finish paying and they step outside, Isagi makes his request known.

“I still would like to see that place.”

Rin stood there, seemingly lost on what to do. But Isagi wouldn’t push him to do something he knew the other would not want to do.

They weren’t that far apart, but Isagi takes a step closer, close enough to be well within his personal space, but not that close that they were touching.

Rin still hadn’t moved, and he hadn’t stiffened by the proximity either. Instead, he reaches out, lightly holding onto Isagi’s hand.

“Alright.” His face softens.

“I’ll show you.”

He started off slightly in the lead but it wasn’t long before he looked behind him and Isagi hurried towards his side. There is a liveliness that bustles around them with all the shops in the area. It was all the more obvious when a trend towards the quieter and reserved began to show the closer they got to the residential area.

It was an area that valued the invite of nature, with a clear steady stream that winded around and carried on towards a far distance. Many trees were planted on the sides of roads, designating different pathways. At one point they were hiking up a slight incline before Rin brought them towards a spot where a cluster of trees seemed to signal the end of a road, but he continued to walk past them. Isagi quietly questioned the choice of the location but he soon found himself erasing those thoughts when he saw a clearing up ahead.

Their brush with the foliage was brief before the sky had opened up them once again and they were settled on a view looking over the entire residential area. There was only a railing to shield them from a steep fall, but Isagi deemed it sturdy as he held onto it.

“I feel like parents would have a heart attack if they saw their kids playing near a cliff like this.”

Rin joins him at his side, resting his forearms on top of the railing as he leaned slightly forward, confident that it was enough to support his weight.

“My parents never really had any control over us. We always did what we wanted, but Sae was still responsible about it.”

On a street that seemed far from where they stood, there was a group of teenage boys that laughed loudly as they shoved each other around. Isagi stared at their uniforms, wondering briefly if it was one that Rin also used to wear.

“Picturing Sae as a responsible older brother is odd, I never thought it would be something that would suit him. Then again, imagining him having any kind of close relationship with anyone is also odd.”

Rin kept quiet and Isagi turned to peer at him. He was suddenly struck with an inspiring thought and backed away from the cliff’s edge, positioning himself so that he was behind Rin.

Isagi had already taken out his phone, his personal one that was not meant for work, and quickly opened up the camera application. He angled his phone so that the image would come out well no matter what—though it wasn’t like it was an impossible task, with the nice lighting and how breathtaking the view behind them was.

“Can I take a picture of you?” He asks.

Rin’s automated response as he turned his head slightly to look at Isagi was exactly what he had wanted. Without waiting for his reply he had already confirmed his choice, capturing the moment for life.

Before he could be denied anything, Isagi sprung forward to proudly show Rin the picture he had taken.

“It came out really good! Modeling agencies would be jealous of this you know.” Even with those words he felt like he was underplaying how great the picture looked. Rin’s face was definitely contributing a lot, but it really was how everything came together. The unforgettable colors of a sky with a setting sun, an illuminating glow that gave the perfect lighting, it was something that could never be taken again.

Rin coughed, slightly embarrassed that he was caught off guard before he glared half-heartedly at him.

“Whatever. As long as you don’t post it anywhere.”

Isagi grins at him. “I won’t, I promise. This a photo only for me.”

There was a wonder that sprung on him, having such a pretty thing in his possession. He wanted to keep looking at it but purposefully limited himself. While Isagi had turned his gaze back to the view in front of them, he was still pondering in his mind if it would be too much to make the photo his home screen background.

However, he didn’t get too carried away in his thoughts when he felt a set of eyes on him and he whipped his head to see Rin also pointing a phone at him.

His eyes widened, completely taken aback by Rin’s actions. 

“Here, look.”

Rin then turned his phone and showed Isagi what he had taken.

Framed in the photo was the side profile of his face, his eyes intent on looking at the scenery that was in front of him. The same sky from his own had also served as the backdrop, paired together like a curated collection.

Isagi looked up from the photo and into Rin’s impassive expression. 

“It’s only fair.”

He then echoes the statement Isagi had made, sounding so fond that it made his face warm up.

Together, they had created something that was for their own eyes, a rare piece of time that was not to be shared, a time they existed for themselves.

A photo only for me.

A moment untainted by anything else.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

With mesmerizing twinkles of bright colors, his sea of lights had formed in grandeur. A vivid vision that plays behind closed eyes, a recollection that only grows.

To think that it had almost been a full year since he had last stood in this exact same position.

Above the screams and cheers, the five of them were much louder. In unison they shouted, making their presence known.

“We are LockedON!”

On cue, the familiar backtrack to one of their leading title songs begins to play. With immediate recognition, deafening cheers continued to pour through the entire stadium. Any empty spaces were filled with the lyrics they sing with their whole heart, a dance that carries forth their energy.

There was momentum that pushed them forward like they were all running down a large hill and feeling as though they could take off any second. It was the first show on their annual tour and it was given that they were going to start off strong.

With each of his performances, it was irrefutable that he always gave it all—it was the one time, every time, he felt like his worth was tested. It would have been the same as always, but this day was a bit different, there would be someone important watching his show, someone he really wanted to give his whole being towards.

The second song that plays is one that had choreography that was more relaxed. At one point, Isagi found himself joining hands with Kurona. They made shapes resembling hearts with each beat, they spin around, running down stages while waving at their closest fans. It was the time for them to have the childlike spirit that was a favorite among many.

Despite how carefree he may be presenting himself during that particular moment, he was entirely professional, which also entailed not letting his eyes stray constantly towards one particular seat in the audience that he was sure was occupied. When it comes to his work, he devotes himself equally to all, leaving no stone unturned. He follows routines, working together with his group members so there wouldn’t be a single thought of doubt in anyone’s mind.

Hand-picked, the five stars that they are. Their life stories have all intervened together to be here, sharing a dream that could only exist because they were all here.

These are all the flash thoughts that pass through Isagi as he keeps up with his performance. It comes to him and then it leaves, revisiting him again, like it has a mind of its own. But there are feelings that it also carries, an unmistakable joy that gives him meaning.

When he stands there, his world appeared so bright, almost blinding him if his eyes did not adjust. Painful to some, ridiculous to others, but to him, it was his honest desire.

A desire for purpose.

For happiness.

A life he wrote entirely for himself and shared with his most loved.

VII. December 2023

“Can we really hold indifferent opinions about people?”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I mean, when you describe someone as indifferent, isn’t that you judging them to be so unremarkable that they don’t matter to you? Maybe it’s because I’m quite a sensitive person, but if someone were to say that they don’t care about me, even if they were essentially a stranger, I would feel hurt.”

His partner spares him a glance before returning their eyes to the script they were reading. 

“Well, that’s because you are the kind of person that wants everyone to love them. Even when they don’t even know you.”

“Would you say that is a flaw then?”

“I would say that makes you needy and desperate for attention.”

Isagi eyes the next line he was about to say, preparing his voice so that he would sound petulant, or as best as he could sound petulant.

“You didn’t have to say it like that.”

The voice change caused Rin to look up from his script, silently questioning him for his choice.

“Don’t you think their character comes off as a bit childish here?” Isagi tries to justify. He flips back to the previous page they were reading and points at the past scene. “Remember how they were complaining so much at this part? It came off as immature for me.”

“It is a possible angle.”

Isagi felt a yawn approach him, suddenly feeling the exhaustion hit. He lies down on the couch, the sides of his face pressed against the seat cushion as he stared at Rin’s profile.

“I don’t mind reading lines with you, but does it always have to be this late?”

Rin looks at him from the side. “I memorize them the best at night, you know this already.”

“Yeah yeah, I get it. Just let me take a quick break.”

“You better not fall asleep then.”

Isagi closes his eyes and waves off Rin’s concerns with his hand. He was tired, but he kept his mind working, thinking about how he could get Rin to end their session a bit earlier tonight. 

He was deep in his thoughts when he felt a faint touch ghost along his jaw before it moves to brush his hair aside. He shoots his eyes open and finds himself a few millimeters away from Rin’s face.

They stare at each other before Isagi leans in to give a quick kiss on his lips, a cute peck that he would honestly describe it to be.

“Your break is over.” Rin only replies, turning his head so that Isagi couldn’t see his blush. Rin getting shy whenever they kiss was always such an endearing sight, but Isagi knew it wouldn’t last, considering how bolder he had been getting so he was going to cherish it as much as he could.

He sits up. “Your definition of a break is an abuse of worker’s rights.” Nevertheless, he prepares the script and flips back to the page they were reading.

Rin ignores what he said and instead responds with what he thinks would be reassuring. 

“We’ll just finish this scene and the next one. It won’t be too bad.”

Isagi narrows his eyes at him, not feeling completely convinced. This wasn’t the first time he had helped Rin practice his lines, of course, it wasn’t a position he was forced into and he merely offered because he honestly did want to help him out. He also initially thought it would be fun, pretending to take on these minor roles, but the novelty had worn off rather quickly.

Constantly upholding perfection, Rin refused to move on from something unless it is, how they describe it, done perfectly—even if it wasn’t the real thing and just a practice round. He couldn’t count the number of times they have sat there for long periods, just reading and rereading lines until they were completely memorized and all manners regarding his voice and speech were exactly what he had envisioned.

Regardless of the time and efforts required of him, Isagi still volunteered every time because, in the end, he wanted to be there for Rin, a dedicated support system that was built for success.

Feeling slightly more invigorated, Isagi stretched his arms and took in a deep breath before letting it out.

“Alright then.”

He sits up straight.

“Let's continue.”

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

J-STARS Daily

EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH RISING ACTING STAR ITOSHI RIN

December 13, 2023

While originally thought to be following in a family member's footsteps, Itoshi Rin has shown to pave his own way through his acting stardom with the release of his latest work in Days of Blue, a film that has sung high praise from several critics.

How did it feel to have Days of Blue as your official film debut?

It was the best project that I could have done. It was an opportunity where I got to work with a crew that had a lot of talent, and it was because of them that I could stand out with the role that I portray. Sharing a similar vision about the story and characters with the writers was also a good thing to have, especially for a first film because it helped build a cohesive understanding of the goals and motivations that we wanted to achieve.

It is worth noting that the film came out soon after the release of another greatly anticipated film, My Glory, starring the actor, Itoshi Sae, which many have recognized to be a relative of yours. As fellow actors, do you ask each other for advice or help when it comes to acting?

I acknowledge that my brother, as an actor, is truly one of a kind. In some ways, he did inspire me to pursue acting and I am thankful for that. Our acting styles are different however and I would say we both view acting as different ideas as well. When starting out, general advice about acting, for example, tips on how to remember lines quickly, are something that would be helpful to share. But when it comes to the actual portrayal of the character, it’s in my opinion that is when the actor’s own personal beliefs and values are best showcased.

What kind of unexpected difficulties did you encounter during filming?

My lack of experience working in diverse teams of people was a difficulty that I have faced. When we don’t put ourselves in situations where we become exposed to what we acknowledge to be unfamiliar to us, it can be off-putting and hard to accept or even adjust to. To overcome this, it’s about taking the initiative to better understand what we originally couldn’t before and it might become something we learn a lot about.

Would you like to continue pursuing acting in these coming-of-age dramas? Do you have a particular favorite genre to act in?

Rather than focusing on the genre, it’s the writing that would allow a film to stand out. Obviously, some genres focus on certain tropes and tactics, but the most skilled and experienced writers are those that are able to create a story that relies truly on the story itself and not on some gimmicks that are able to attract and hold favor with the audience. It can be said the best writer can write something that is horror and allow those that dislike horror to come and enjoy it.

With the previous question in mind, what kind of projects can we expect to see you in next?

Some of my upcoming roles will be more diverse from Jirou. I would say you can expect to see me playing roles ranging from being a hero to becoming a deceptive antagonist. As you can see, there is a lot left that is to be experienced.

⊱— · ⋆ ✩ ⋆ · —⊰

He felt something unusual, but not completely unpleasant. Granted he had never been through another situation like it so it was arguably justifiable it was unfamiliar to him. The entire plotline, the character’s actions—he already knew all of it because he had read it, even studied it. Everything about the film that was playing in front of him was not supposed to be surprising to him, but the feeling still struck him, like he never really knew anything at all.

There was hope, even when there wasn’t. He was sad when he should have been happy. Isagi wasn’t the only one affected in this way because when he took a glimpse at Bachira who was sitting next to him, he sees his eyes well similarly with tears.

It was something universal that Rin managed to convey.

“He’s really good,” Bachira whispers.

Isagi nods in agreement.

“He really is.”

They watched on, the progression of the events experienced by one person, but rippled towards the many that surround them. The devastating claws of loss that never once was shaken off, but the pursuit of a grand dream to take the world around them to create art, and to sell that art helped loosen them.

A character to root for, side characters to appreciate. Isagi saw how his role was replaced by someone entirely different, but he wasn’t bothered at all by it. By becoming an outsider to the whole process, he was granted a position that those involved did not have the luxury of.

A newfound perspective, to gain a view not inhibited by one’s own entanglement but one that was not completely ignorant.

There really was an odd way how life can play out because Isagi had blessed all of the gods that this was how everything went for him.

He imagines a scenario in his head, not exactly pretending because he knew it would come true. But he thinks about when he would part ways with Bachira later that night, vowing to be back at the dorms the next morning. It was a typical routine for him and was something that no longer felt out of place.

He then would call for a cab, a good one that he knew and would never exploit an idol’s secret because they made a vow, and signed a contract of proof. They would take him to an address that he states, making no comment and only doing what they were tasked to do.

The whole trip would be fast-forwarded, a blur but it wouldn’t be concerning because it was irrelevant. It was only important that he got there, standing in front of that apartment door and waiting for it to open.

When the door does open, there wasn’t a face that greeted him but the turned back of a person because it was an established trust between them that it would be Isagi at the door and only Isagi. Rin let himself be in a vulnerable position inside his own home because he felt secure enough to do so.

Isagi had then shut the door, locking it before taking off his shoes and entering the apartment that seemed to permanently be fixated with low lighting.

“Did you watch it?” He was asked.

“Yes.”

Rin waited for him in the living room as he went to grab a glass of water in a kitchen that he knew all the inner workings of.

“How was it?”

He didn’t look up but replied rather whimsically. “I think you already know my answer to that.”

“Can you guess which part was my favorite?” Isagi asks instead. He had returned with two cups in hand, placing them carefully so they were not near the numerous stacks of paper scattered among the coffee table.

His companion’s answer was immediate, spoken truly with confidence.

“When he comes home near the end and he realizes he is no longer alone.”

Isagi smiles and shakes his head. “Not quite, but that was a really touching scene.”

He reached over to pick up a booklet, he eyed the lines of black font filling the page before looking up at the man across from him.

“It was when he nearly lost himself the second time when the work he poured his everything into gets rejected by the publisher.”

There was an inquisitive look on Rin’s face, as subtle as it was. “Why?”

“Because,” he starts, looking back down at the page.

“The pain was sobering, but yet almost beautiful because of how life-like it was. The human condition.”

Rin sounded like he wasn’t convinced that the scene Isagi was alluding to could be a favorite of anyone’s. “That wasn’t the worst that he had been through though, there were numerous other parts that he had suffered.” 

Isagi mindlessly traces over the highlighted sections, a bright fluorescent hue that drags across his finger.

“But there was more to this pain, right? The rejection was also painful because it was a realization that his capabilities extended past his brother, which used to be all he had known and what he used to base his writing around.”

“To me, it was the first real moment that he had begun to grow. To become more than what he imprisoned himself to be.”

“To me, that’s what made it beautiful, like a rebirth almost.”

He reached over and laid his hand on top of Rin’s, basking in its warmth.

“It was the truest beginning of a story.”