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you sit there in your heartache (waiting on some beautiful boy to save you from your old ways)

Summary:

the five times gavin and michael disagreed (and the one time they didn't)

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

The five times Gavin and Michael disagreed, and the one time they didn’t.

1.

“But Micool-” Gavin started out, laughing.

“You fucking idiot! ‘Do babies float?’ Humans are buoyant, yes they float. Why do you think when you’re swimming and you float on your back, that you don’t fucking drown?” He yelled back at his boyfriend, a laugh escaping his throat. The other guys (and girl, Jack was there), were cracking up - this was a normal thing between the two.

“But babies don’t know how to swim!” He retorted, making Ray snort.

“Neither do you, but you still float, genius.”

“Throw me in a fucking lake then, Michael!”

“Believe me, Gavin. If you weren’t so good at hacking, we’d have done that a long time ago,” Jack called from across the room, looking up from her book.

2.

“It was my fault,” Gavin slammed his fist on the table. “It was my fucking fault. Ray is laying in the other room with a fucking hole in his shoulder, because I couldn’t get into the damn files. Why the fuck did you let me in this crew, Geoff? I’m a bloody idiot!”

“Bullshit.” Geoff and Michael both blurted out. “Gavin,” Geoff continued. “Don’t ever fucking say that. Yes, we might call you a dumbass or a moron every once in awhile. But we don’t mean it.”

“Ray could have died because of me, Geoff! Don’t you see that? Thank god he only got shot in the shoulder and not the heart or some kind of bullshit.”

“Gavin! I am going to fucking kill you,” Michael sighed, taking the other’s hand. “You’re not an idiot. We’ve fucked up worse than that before you joined the crew. Did anybody ever tell you about the time Ryan fell off of a building? Because Jack messed up her signals?”

“Still got the scar,” Ryan chuckled, moving his hair back to show Gavin the long line across the back of his head. “Nearly died, Jack’s an asshole. But guess what? I’m still alive, and so is Ray. Yes, I love him to death, and I’m so pissed that he got shot. But I’m not pissed at you, I’m pissed at the bastard that shot him. Okay?”

“He’s right,” Michael looked over at Gavin. He just shook his head.

“It was my fault,” he replied stubbornly.

“I am going to kill you. I love you, but I am going to kill you. This wasn’t your god damned fault, Gav!”

“Remember what you said when we first met? I can believe what I want as long as I’m not hurting anybody. You can believe what you want as long as you’re not hurting anybody. That’s how it would be.”

“You’re hurting yourself.”

“I don’t fucking care.”

3.

“Gav, what the fuck? It’s ninety degrees out today. Why are you wearing pants?”

“Because… it’s kind of illegal to leave the house without them? I know I’ve got an amazing dick, but c’mon, Micool.”

“I mean why are you wearing pants and not shorts, dumbfuck.”

“I don’t have any clean.”

“I just did your laundry yesterday.”

“Oh. I didn’t see them,” The lie slipped off of Gavin’s tongue. “Oh well. I’m too lazy to change, I’ll survive.”

“Change your fucking pants. I don’t want you dying of heatstroke.”

“I’ll get sunburnt!”

“You’re tan as shit. You tan, not burn. You know this. Now you’re just making me think you’re hiding something. If I think about it, we haven’t fucked in awhile. You’re hiding something.”

“I’m not hiding anything, Michael!” Gavin growled. “Just leave me alone.”

“I’m your boyfriend. I’m not going to just leave you alone. You can trust me.”

“Not when you scream at me every other minute!” Gavin cried, glaring at the other. “You fucking yell at me for everything! Can’t I have a fucking second of privacy? Can’t I keep anything to myself?”

“Not when I’m afraid that something’s wrong!” Michael screamed. “You know what, Gavin? If that’s how you feel-” His voice cracked. “-Then fine. I’ll leave you alone. I hope this is what you want.”

4.

“Idiot. Idiot. Bloody idiot,” Gavin whispered to himself, pacing back and forth. “Why did you do that? You’re fucking stupid. He hates you now,” tears rolled down his cheeks and landed on the carpeted floor. “You should have told him. You should have just told him. Why didn’t you tell him?”

He moved into the bathroom, and opened the cupboard under the sink. In the very back, under all of Jack’s pads (she was on birth control to make things easier during Heists, but they were there just in case), where he kept his lighter.

He rolled up his pant leg - his left one. He’d done it to his right this morning, so he wasn’t going to do that again. He was stupid, yes - but he wasn’t going to seriously hurt himself.

When he clicked the lighter on, he heard a yell. Why didn’t he close the door? He knew why. He thought that Michael wasn’t going to check on him anymore. He thought that Michael hated him.

 

“Gavin! What the hell?” Michael screamed (Gavin had never heard him scream that loud). His voice had cracked, and his eyes had filled with tears.
The other guys, and Jack, sprinted into the room when they’d heard Michael scream. Michael already ran to knock the lighter out of his hand, and Gavin was now sitting on the ground, dazed.

“Gavin?” Jack murmured, sitting on the ground next to him. “Gav, buddy. Look at me. Please?”

“W-What-”

“I’m not mad at you. Okay? None of us are,” her soothing voice had a calming effect on him. “We’re upset, yes. Obviously we’re upset. But we aren’t mad - we could never be mad at you. Michael isn’t mad at you, either. He loves you. We all do, but not the same way he does.”

Jack went on comforting him (probably to stop the younger from going into shock), while the others consoled Michael, tried to stop him from doing something he shouldn’t.

“G-Gav, you n-need to stop,” he said, after awhile of silence.

“I can’t.”

5.

“You’re going to kill yourself doing this, Gavin!”

“No I’m not. I’m being carefu-”

“-If you were being careful, you wouldn’t be fucking burning yourself.”

“I can’t stop, Michael. I don’t think you’ve ever gone through self-harm, because it’s not that simple! This is hard as shit for me, you know that? I want to stop. Believe me. But in these past few weeks, every single time I’ve felt upset, this is what I went to. Any time I had a negative thought. It made me feel better - and don’t even ask me why, because I don’t have an answer. I can’t just stop.”

“Stop buying lighters. If you actually cared about me, Gav-”

“I do bloody care about you! You mean the fucking world to me!”

“Obviously I don’t.”

+1.

“I think it’s time we break up,” Michael said, the next time him and Gavin were alone.

“Yeah. I do too.”

Notes:

this is the first thing ive posted on here and im so afraid its shit omg. but idk. i might do a sequel but????

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