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Recurring nightmares scared Charles to no end. It meant the dream had some underlying symbolism of some sort, and he hated trying to figure out the profound meaning. There was one where he heard a woman, gasping, "My husband, my father, and my brother!" She would then count to twelve before whispering, "Hush!"
He wondered why she repeated it like a mantra. Perhaps she was mentally ill, experienced a traumatic event, or probably a devil or angel is trying posses her. The first two seemed more likely, but spiritual body possession won't be ruled out entirely. As she repeated those words, a bloodied man would jump right in front of him. Ok, not bloody, but there was a wound bleeding profusely in the man's chest. He would look enraged, a fire in his dark eyes.
The man would spat words of hate in French, cursing Charles' family to hell. He didn't know what his family did to that man, but he only cowered from the stabbed man. He would question the man, asking what his family did. The man would only try to grab his throat as he continued his tirade about nobles. The brondette would profusely apologize for what his family possibly did, but the man was not having any of it.
"You are the reason for doing this to my family bastard! You and all of the nobility will pay for your hellish crimes! Damn you in the fires of hell! Let Satan torture all of you until the end of time! You don't deserve to be in this fucking world... None of you!" the man would scream.
The man would then try try to reach for his neck, and that was when Charles decided to abscond. Fear and adrenaline would run through his veins as he escaped from the crazy man. He didn't know what happened, and he didn't know why he was to blame. He didn't do anything to the woman, and he's sure of it!
Whoosh
After maybe a few seconds of running, a ring of fire would somehow surrounded him, causing him to sweat with anticipation and fear. He would try to look for an escape, but saw none as he looked around frantically. The dream was a nightmare of torture, something he wanted to end... To end this odd hell where he's wanted dead.
"Then tell the Wind and Fire where to stop," a voice would growl, echoing through the darkness. It sounded familiar, but he couldn't remember whose voice it is. The tall embers in front of him would then grow to a frightful height, a figure forming among the red-orange blaze. The flames would snap open its eyes, a scowl forming. The brondette was always beyond shaken when he saw this, feet unable to move from their place.
His dark mossy eyes would widen in fear as the flames take shape of a certain senior. "Th-Thérè-rèse?" he would stutter, body shaking in fear. Thérèse would then slam her hands on either end of the pyre's diameter, face about less than a foot away from his own. He would squeak out a yelp of fear, stumbling onto his behind as the embers tried to lick his skin.
Embers would fly from the much older-looking senior as she wailed: But don't... Tell... ME! Thérèse's would then breathed out flames to incinerate Charles. He would gasp, bringing his arms up in a feeble attempt to shield himself from that angry blaze....
And he would wake up in a cold sweat most nights, a silent scream tearing from his throat. This continued on for maybe a few more weeks until his junior roommate threw a bucket of cold water over him one night. When that happened, he screeched in surprise, falling off his bed in the process. With wide eyes, he stared at the sleep-deprived teen, who only had a softened scowl. He asked what the bloody hell is with the screaming, a typical Sydney reaction. Charles only gaped at him, unable to speak, because of that horrid nightmare.
A few minutes passed before the fiery brunette sighed and muttered something about sleep. That's when the brondette's mind clicked, and he proceeded to tackle Sydney to the ground as he sobbed about the corpse and Thérèse. The junior groaned, but thankfully comforted the freshman until they both fell asleep.
Unfortunately, that ended up with their conductor (their first period was study hall, so no fouls) lecturing them about proper bed times and such. However, that night was when that recurring dream ended. He had that dream ever since he met the seemingly cold senior, and it was the main reason why he mostly avoided her.
However this dream... This dream made little sense...
~~~~~~~~~~
A baby was wailing, but he didn't know where the little one was. He appeared to be in a study of some sort, and there were stacks of papers on the desk he was sitting at. From what he's reading, it appeared to be homework. What the subject was, he didn't know.
"Charles, can you check on the baby? My hands are full with dinner!"
Was that Lucie? "Um, sure Lucie!" he called, slowly getting out of his chair.
Were they married? How long? When did they start dating? When did they have a baby!? Last time he checked, they were both fourteen, soon-to-be fifteen in the spring. They were way too young to have sex! Much less a baby!
He followed the sounds of the wails, cautiously walking to the source. The hallway felt long, and it felt like it took him years to reach the room.
"Sh, sh... It's alright child... Uncle Sydney is here..." A smooth voice whispered.
His dark mossy eyes widened in shock. Uncle Sydney? What's the junior doing here? He peered behind the doorway, catching the sight of the fiery brunette, looking much older, cradling a little blonde child. He cooed softly, gently rocking the baby.
It's official. He's going mad. Sydney was acting all fatherly and taking care of... His child much better than he. The world was going to end, and he hoped to wake up soon.
"... Golden slumbers kiss your eyes..."
A soft melody barely reached his ears, since it began at a low note. The junior was singing a lullaby to the child, eyes only on the baby.
"Smiles await you when you rise... Sleep~, pretty baby, do not cry~... And I~ will sing a lullaby..."
The song made the baby's cries lessen and made Charles relax as the lyrics lulled them both to peace.
"Cares~ you know not... Therefore sleep~, sleep while over you a watch I'll keep~..."
Charles proceeded to lean against the doorway, a sweet smile on his lips. He heard from one of the RAs in his building that Sydney always knew what to do with children. He hardly believed it, considering he shares a room with the sleep-deprived teen. However, he was a teen, not a child. Maybe he should go on that one trip for religion, where they go to another country and help people in need.
"Beautiful is he not?"
His breath hitched as he felt a presence placed a hand on each of his shoulders. He wanted to look behind him, but he couldn't move.
"But you cannot have him... You are married to your dear Lucie Manette..." The presence chuckled darkly. "What a sad reminder..."
The world then faded into black as his dark mossy eyes lost focus. He suddenly felt blue for some reason, losing the peace he was feeling earlier.
"But do you care?" The presence moves to face him, revealing that it was a replica of him as a black figure with red glowing eyes. "When he unfolds his wings... Do you sense the strangest things...?" It leaned against him, hand over where his heart was. "Things no one would ever guess? Things mere words cannot express?" it whispered, a strange smile on its lips.
Did he like Sydney? He didn't know. All he knew that he loved his voice, but his personality was still growing on him.
".... No?"
"That is such a lie..." His shadow hissed, baring its fangs.
He flinched, wanting to get away from this... This thing! But he couldn't, and it made him more uncomfortable when it came closer, nearly touching his lips.
"I know you want him in the most sinful ways..."
He blinked in confusion, a strange feeling forming in his belly. He... He would never think of Sydney like that. It's so... So wrong... And... Sydney was a heterosexual! And he was too... Right?
"Do you... Do you find yourself beguiled by the dangerous and wild?" his shadow challenged, red eyes boring into his own.
Charmed? By Sydney? By his voice yes, but him as a whole? Some of the junior's habits do annoy him, worry him, and anger him to no end, but... Some of them are quite endearing.... Strangely sweet and amusing even...
"Do you feed on the need for the beauty underneath?"
The fiery brunette was beautiful in his own right, especially when he's on stage. He forever looked like this fallen angel looking for a place to call home and people to call family on stage. His dark circles emphasized how he spent many nights without any sleep, but gave him an air of loneliness. His spring eyes, however, told that he was willing to live and fight with everything he has. A truly beautiful human underneath...
But did he really want to be with Sydney in an actual relationship? To hold hands, hug, kiss, share their deepest secrets, their insecurities, and possibly have sex? Charles gulped nervously as possible scenarios of Sydney and him as a couple ran through his head. Did he really want that?
His shadow grinned knowingly. "Have you felt your senses surge? And surrender to the urge?"
Ah, that has happened a few many times during this first semester. The fiery brunette, due to sleep deprivation, can be very disoriented in the mornings, especially when he didn't drink his coffee. Many A few times in the morning in their dorm room, Sydney would accidentally knock them both over to the floor from the lack of sleep and/or coffee. A few times, their lips would meet accidentally. The junior actually often always forgets what happened in the morning once he's fully awake (by his standards), so that saved the Charles from the awkwardness.
But for some reason, it made him want more kisses from the upperclassman. The urges happened randomly, and he often wondered where the hell they came from, but he always brushed it off. So maybe... He was bisexual? Was that what they call the attraction to both sexes? Hm...
"So strange yet beautiful... He's so beautiful... Perhaps too beautiful..." His shadow cupped his cheek, forcing the brondette to focus on the dark duplicate. He attempted to squirm in its grip, and it only smirked. "But he's beyond your reach... Your reputation would be ruined because of him..." It analyzed his face, looking thoughtful as it gently stroked his cheek. Suddenly, it scowled. "But he's such a lowly solicitor working for a pathetic barrister," it growled, scratching his cheek in the process.
Charles flinched, whimpering as blood trickled down from his wound. The shadow then wiped the blood away with a finger before sampling his blood, sucking on its finger for a bit.
"But when he lifts his voice and sings..." it muttered, looking into his dark mossy eyes. "Don't you feel amazing things?" it whispered, leaning closer with glassy eyes.
The brondette felt pleasant tingles go down his spine when he recalled Sydney's voice. He always felt at ease whenever the junior sang, melting at the melodic voice. When asked, the junior would sing him to sleep if he was willing and convinced.
"... Y-yes..." he replied, embarrassed to admit it.
The shadow grinned, which proceeded to grow with each word. "Things you know you can't confess... Things you thirst for, nonetheless..."
"Yes..." he moaned, mind going haywire as he thought about the fiery brunette. "Everything's just as you said..." It's very embarrassing, but it's true to an extent. He liked Sydney to an extent, just like how he feels about Lucie. He liked both of them to certain extents, but probably not enough to consider as crushes.
"Tell me you need it too. Need for the beauty underneath!" The shadow's grin grew to a crazed smile, red eyes wide with an unknown emotion. Was this shadow his lust? His possible lust for the blonde freshman and the fiery junior? That honestly frightened him. He never thought he would lust for someone, much less his two closest friends. He didn't think that one of the seven deadly sins would appear in his dream, confront him about his desires. Desires that he didn't know about.
"I..."
"Char-!"
"I... Need..."
"Charles!"
"The beauty..."
"Charles, you goddamn git, wake the fuck up!"
Someone pushed him off his bed, where he fell onto the floor with a yelp and a heavy thud. He groaned as sleep slowly ebbed away from his form in a painful way. His head was swimming with faint memories of the dream, which he didn't really want. He just wanted the dream to disappear from his memory vault, erased so that he doesn't have to think about it. Thinking about it will send him into paranoia about his speech. If he says something wrong to Lucie and/or Sydney, he would have to explain the dream, and that's something he doesn't want to do.
Here's an example of what could happen:
"Oh hey Charles, how are you doing?"
"I'm doing well. What about you and the baby?"
"Baby? What baby? Charles, did you get a girl pregnant?"
"What? Oh no! Our baby. How is our baby doing?"
"Our baby? Charles, what are you talking about?"
Yeah, not what he wants... However, he guessed he would have to explain it sooner than later, since a certain junior was giving him a worried glare.
"So, what's it this time?" the fiery brunette demanded asked with an annoyed tone.
He stared up at his roommate as he unfolds himself from the blanket burrito.
.
.
.
"... Nothing..." he replied, picking up his blanket to put it onto his bed. He then flopped onto the mattress, drained from the dream.
"Bullshit. It can't be nothing Darnay." Sydney said, still annoyed. Sitting next to the brondette on the bed, he pushed an arm away to get more space. "You were sleep-talking this time," he pointed out. The freshman paled, breath catching in his throat. The elder snickered at the sight. "Rather early for that don't you think?"
Charles doesn't say anything as his mind panicked. What was he going to say? How was he going to say it? Will his roommate report him for being a possible homosexual? Will he get expelled from this school for liking men? Oh dear god-
Poke. "Hey, dude, answer me." Poke. "I don't like being kept waiting y'know." Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke. Po-
"Sydney?" he breathed hesitantly.
Said male faked a gasp. "The mighty one has spoken! What wise words will he say to us this time?"
The freshman groaned in annoyance, throwing a hand over his face as he sat up. "Sydney..." he muttered.
"Am I the one chosen to continue your work o' great one? If I am, then I will do my best to fulfill your work," the junior mocked, a teasing grin on his face.
"Sydney! Goddammit, just quit mocking me and listen for a second!" Charles yelled, slamming his hand against his mattress. He wasn't in the mood for teasing and mocking. He knew his roommate meant well, but he doesn't want to deal with it tonight and tomorrow. His eyes met with the other's eyes of spring as silence fell between them. They searched for something in each other's eyes, trying to decipher the emotion behind them.
.
.
.
.
.
.
"Must have been a bad dream," Sydney whispered, pushing himself more onto the bed to lean against the wall. "Spill if you want. If not, I'll go back to bed. I'm giving you three minutes."
Typical Sydney Carton reaction...
Gears moved in Charles' head, trying to figure how he should explain it. He wouldn't say it bluntly, because that might frighten the upperclassman. Perhaps he should beat around the bush? No, his roommate hated that and would then begin to interrogate you like you were in court. When that happened, he gets flustered, unable to say things gently for the elder. Perhaps he should open up with a question, so that he can lead into what he wanted to say. Yes, that seemed like a good start.
"... Do you... Do you have these odd dreams?" he blurted out, eyes unfocused.
The fiery brunette sighed. "That took you about two minutes..." he grumbled, trying to get comfortable against the wall. "And yes, I had dreams, but I don't know what's your definition of odd," he then replied.
Charles scratched his head, screwing his eyes shut to block out that voice in his head. "Like... They seem like.... Like..."
"Like, like, like, like, like, like, like. Quit that, that's American talk. Angel must have infected you." He snickered. "They literally went back to America and came back with that annoying American speech." He scowled at the memory. "Students ended up speaking like them after a few weeks or so of speaking like that. It was so annoying." He rubbed his temples. "They got me too, so I practically immersed myself in the library every day." The freshman raised a questioning brow. "The librarian has one of the heaviest British accents around this school, so... Yeah..." Sydney puffed out his cheeks before letting the air out, looking a bit more relaxed after that.
The fiery brunette stared off into space for a bit until he snapped his head towards Charles. Spring bore into moss, expecting something from the latter's owner. It took a bit to process that his roommate wanted him to continue, and when he realized it, he turned a bit red before clearing his throat.
"Like... Memories.... Distant memories from another life or something?"
Sydney blew a puff of air in response, and looked at him as if to say 'really?' "Who the hell doesn't Darnay?"
"No, but..." He fisted his sheets in his hand before releasing them. "Like, they would fade away..."
The upperclassman gave a confused look with pursed lips. "And?"
"And..." Shadow? Clone? Duplicate? "Some desire... An embodiment of it... Decided to talk to you about yours..."
The junior stared at him, making him a bit uncomfortable. It was as if he was looking at him like a freak or something... A monster perhaps? Maybe... Once he gets to the part about his shadow talking about his possible lust for Lucie and the upperclassman.
Sydney pursed his lips, unsure of what to say. Did he have dreams that seemed like memories from another life? Yes. Did he have desires taking a form in his dreams and confront him about it? No. However, he didn't want the lower classman to think he was alone in this one. Hell no. He promised himself that he would make sure everyone felt like they had someone to lean onto, even if it meant doing so with people he hated like Acòrd and Defarge .
"Not exactly... I mean I had some huge, drunk bee appear in one of my dreams." He nervously laughed. "Didn't know what the hell that was about, but I talked to our RA about it."
Charles groaned. "I didn't mean it like that... I meant like.... An emotion taking on a form or something..." he muttered, rubbing his eyes.
It suddenly became quiet, which was very uncharacteristic for the two. Sydney had three types of silence: don't disturb me, I'm thinking; I'm sleep-deprived and haven't had my pot load of coffee; and holy shit, what the hell did I just hear. When Charles asked about an embodiment of something, Sydney was in the 'don't disturb me, I'm thinking' silence. This silence was, however, the latter: 'holy shit, what the hell did I just hear.' It was a very rare kind of silence, and that silence always terrified the other students. If someone was able to shut Sydney down, then that was bad.
The 'holy shit, what the hell did I just hear' silence usually took one of two ways. The first one was Sydney just completely shutting down. He doesn't speak, doesn't focus, doesn't eat, and all the other things that would make him a zombie, which would worry the students and staff about his health. The second one was just him thinking for the a certain amount of time, which was usually maybe a few weeks or so, and would stay holed up in their shared dorm. He would only come out of the dorm to eat, go to the bathroom, shower, and maybe get the work from class. This was less worrying on health, but more on the academics. Charles only saw the second way thankfully, but it still sent chills down his spine when he thought about either one.
"... You need to go talk to Angel," the junior instructed.
The freshman pulled a confused face. "What? Now?" He looked up at the clock above his desk, which read 2:30 AM in black. "They're probably still asleep!" he protested.
The fiery brunette wasn't having it as he yanked the brondette up and threw their door open. It slammed against the wall, making a loud bang. Hopefully, no one heard that. It took maybe about five quick strides to their RC's door, which had a bronze plate reading 'Angel Skyes'. The fiery brunette proceeded to knock on the door loudly, to which the brondette flinched at the volume and how much power his roommate was putting into it. No one answered.
"Ah...." Charles began. "Seems like they're not here..." He turned his body towards the hall. "Let's go ba-!"
The door opened, interrupting his sentence. Their RA was wearing a tank top and shorts, totally ready for bed, but didn't seem tired at all. " Did one of you get a profound dream or some emergency from someone you know outside this school?" they asked, rubbing underneath their eyes.
Charles gaped. How...?
"First one," Sydney replied.
And with that, they were sitting at their RA's desk with hot drinks sitting on it in their room. The room was slightly bigger than the dorms. It held a filing cabinet, a lamp, a bed, a dresser, a trash can, a desk, a bookcase, three chairs, and a table. The dorm rooms held two beds, two desks, two chairs, two trash cans, two lamps, and two dressers.
"Ok, so it's an ungodly hour in the morning. What's up?" the blunette questioned, sipping on their hot tea.
Sydney only glanced at Charles. He only proceeded to groan. "Do I have to tell them?"
The fiery brunette sat up straighter, soft spring eyes hardening into a glare. "Of course you fucking have to! You said some kind of shit about emotions taking on a human form!" he shouted, pointing an accusing finger at him.
"I doubt it's very important," the brondette mumbled, rubbing the heels of his hands into his eyes.
"No, it's very important," the blunette wearied, setting down their tea.
The upperclassman folded his arms triumphantly, the 'I told you so' glint in his eyes. The lower classman only slid down his seat with a groan. He didn't want to talk about this embarrassing, yet horrifying dream.
"How important Angel?" he decided to ask.
Golden eyes analyzed his exhausted form, taking in the dark circles and the unusually pale skin. "Depends," they replied, grabbing a pen and clicking it. "Tell me about the dream. Then I can tell you what it means," they instructed, grabbing a notepad from somewhere in their desk. Opening to a clean page, Angel placed the tip of the pen on the first line.
Knowing he had no choice, Charles decided to spill his latest dream to the student-teacher and his roommate.
.
.
.
.
.
"... So, I was in this study..."
End
What will happen next? Find out next time on Boarding Up the Music, episode __: The Dream. ((Maybe... when I get inspiration...))