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Deadpool. Insane. Stupid. Evil. He can't drown the voices out, the voices of strangers as they hide their children behind their backs as he walks past. He pretends it doesn't hurt. Oh God, does it hurt.
Wade Wilson. No one knows who that is anymore. He's not sure what hurts more.
He can't get it out of his head. All he hears are the voices of the people he's saved. "Freak!" They shout as he defuses a bomb in their building. "I'm calling the police!" They scream as he saves a child from getting hit by a car. "You should be in an insane asylum!" They yell as he rescues an animal from a burning building.
He can't do anything right. They tell him to die, to kill himself. And he can't even do that for them. Maybe he is worthless. Maybe he should die.
The thing that hurts the most is that he can't remember when he learned to crave the pain.
---
Spider-Man is a God amongst men, or at least that's what the civilians say. Deadpool could never live up to that. He already knew this, of course. But it doesn't make it hurt any less.
Spider-Man himself has a way about him that makes him forget about all of his worries and problems, but every so often he'll hear someone yelling at him, and it always breaks through that. He can always hear the voices of the people he's saved.
And then there's Peter Parker. He and Spider-Man are both the same, and different. He can be himself around Peter. Around Spider-Man, he has to try and be the hero the city knows he's not. And he's in love with him.
His life is hell but with Peter, he wouldn't have it any other way. They go to fast food places together, when he used to always be alone. They watch movies together and it's so wonderful he sometimes has anxiety attacks but it never makes him forget how amazing his life is with Peter beside him.
He hates his scars, but Peter loves them. Maybe he has a weird scar kink, or maybe he's seeing Wade's true beauty beneath it all. He doesn't really care, all he cares about is that Peter doesn't run away screaming whenever he sees them, and that's good enough for him.
Maybe it's a fucked up relationship. Wade loves Peter more than he could ever love himself, and when Peter gets angry, well... he deserves it. He's always done stupid things, always fucked shit up. He never meant for it to hurt Peter. He deserves the punishment Peter gives him.
He doesn't listen when he's told to get out, that no one should be hurt by their partner. But it doesn't matter what they think, it's what Wade and Peter both know that matters. And they both know that he deserves all of the pain he gets, so when Peter comes home drunk, yelling about one thing or another, he takes the hits. He knows that the city would cheer Spider-Man on if they saw him doing this.
And Wade has only ever lived to please.