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It was exactly one week from Kazuha’s birthday, and Kunikuzushi had a plan. He decided to make every single day until his birthday perfect. Today he decided to wake up early and make one of Kazuha’s favorite meals. Even as a puppet, he was quite a good cook. He plated the meal and set it on the table. With a smile on his face, Kunikuzushi went over to Kazuha’s room. The blonde was in his bed, sleeping peacefully. Kunikuzushi sat down on the bed, hovering over his boyfriends face.
“Hey, wake up.” He tapped on Kazuha’s cheek. “Kazuha.” He waited a few moments before gently shaking his shoulder. “Wake up sleepyhead.” Still nothing. Kazuha wasn’t a deep sleeper, this usually woke him up. Maybe he had a nightmare earlier in the night and fell asleep late. “Kazuhaaa…” he shook his shoulders again. Kunikuzushi was starting to get worried. Reluctantly, he reached for Kazuha’s arm. He was sure what Kazuha was only sleeping, but he had to check. Kunikuzushi placed two fingers on the blonde’s wrists.
Nothing.
No, no, he must have got the wrong spot. He frantically moved his fingers around, checking all over his arm at this point.
Still nothing.
“Kazuha? Kazuha wake up! Stop messing around!” Kunikuzushi wanted to believe this was all a joke, but deep down he knew it wasn’t. Tears rolled down his face, he quickly slapped himself. There was nobody to stop him, nobody to tell him it was okay to cry. His tears kept coming, his grip on Kazuha’s limp arm got stronger.
“Why..why did you have to leave me?!” He sobbed. He heard footsteps come into the room, it was Beidou.
“What’s going on? I could hear you yelling from across the…” Kunikuzushi could see her eyes go wide. Beidou quickly rushed over to Kazuha’s side. “What happened to him?!”
“I don’t know!”
“Go get Ningguang!” Beidou yelled.
“I don’t want to leave him!” His tone was so desperate. Beidou looked him in the eye, she saw an expression she thought she’d never see on the puppet. As much as she didn’t want to leave the boy who was practically her son, she knew he meant a lot to Kunikuzushi. She stood up, wiping the tears off her face.
“I’ll be back.” She sprinted out of the room, leaving just the two of them. Kunikuzushi didn’t let go of Kazuha’s hand, praying that maybe he will wake up. Maybe, just like in the movies, his tears would wake the boy up. Alas, it didn’t. Though Kunikuzushi would like to believe it did. Soon both Beidou and Ningguang came inside the room, and Kunikuzushi’s world went blank.
…
It was so cold. The chair was so uncomfortable. Everything was so loud.
“It seems like he passed away due to a heart attack.” The doctor said, holding a notepad in her hand.
“The hell you mean a heart attack? He was perfectly healthy!” Beidou replied, holding Ningguang’s hand tightly. How Kunikuzushi wished he could do that with Kazuha.
“Heart attacks can happen to anybody. No matter their health.”
“Perhaps it was due to one of his nightmares..” Ningguang suggested.
“No! No it..that doesn’t make sense.”
“It’s very rare, but I think that might have been the case here. You said you found his body in the morning right?” The doctor asked.
“Yes, he was alive in the nighttime.” Ningguang said.
“Then I think it all makes sense.”
Kunikuzushi wanted to go home.
…
“Just yesterday, Kaedehara Kazuha passed away due to a heart attack. Loved by many and known for going against the lightning’s will, he was a good man. If you would like to say a few words, please come up.” As soon as the man finished his statement, Beidou stood up. She walked down the path, stepping in front of the casket.
“Kazuha was like a son to me, though I think most of you know this. I didn’t think I would ever like a poet so much, but..here we are. I’m sure that right now he’s just writing another poem, thinking about all of us. I wish he could have stayed longer..but I guess the world has other plans. I’ll miss you, Kazuha.”
Beidou walked back to her seat, the crowd amassed agreeing with her words. Nahida patted Kunikuzushi’s leg, looking up at him.
“Do you wanna say something?” She asked. Kunikuzushi looked at her with his teary eyes, shaking his head in response. He knew damn well if he went up there he would make a fool of himself by sobbing the entire time. Nahida nodded, looking away from him. She knew how much he hated people seeing him cry.
As the casket was placed in the ground, he watched in horror. It was really happening, huh? He was gone. He couldn’t come back. Thankfully everybody was holding onto their loved ones and couldn’t see the sheer amount weeping Kunikuzushi was doing. He felt so miserable. He hated this, why couldn’t he have died instead? He would have to die another way, but still. Kazuha deserved so much better, he was such a better person than him. Why? Why couldn’t it have been him?
…
For the past few days, Nahida had been staying at the Jade Chamber, helping Beidou, Ningguang, and Kunikuzushi get over Kazuha’s death. She was very good at helping people with their sorrows, so it was perfect. She had made dinner for the four of them, even if Kunikuzushi couldn’t eat..she figured he would like to be included. Once Ningguang and Beidou were at the table, she left to go get the puppet. He was in Kazuha’s room. She slowly creaked open the door, peaking inside. She could see Kunikuzushi in one of Kazuha’s shirts, laying in his bed.
“Kuni?” She asked. “Dinner is ready, do you think you can come?” No response. She got closer, seeing him staring across the room.
“Kuni?” She asked again.
“I’m not hungry.” He said.
“Are you sure?”
“..yes.” His voice cracked. “I’m sure.” Nahida hated seeing him so upset. She sat down on the bed, just like how Kunikuzushi first found Kazuha’s body.
“I know I wasn’t as close to him as you were, but..I know he misses you.”
“He lied to me.” Kunikuzushi said, ignoring Nahida.
“Lied?”
“He told me he would always be on my side. He lied to me. Just like everybody else. He lied. He..he lied to me.”
“Kuni, he didn’t lie to you.”
“Then where is he.“ Nahida could see his hands shaking.
“He’s still next to you, just not in physical form.”
“What? That’s stupid.” He spat out.
“Do you believe in spirits?” She asked. He didn’t reply. “Well, if you don’t or you do, I can feel his spirit in this room. He never meant to leave you, but now that he is gone, he can stay with you forever.”
“That makes no sense..” he grumbled.
“Believe me, he’s here.” Nahida got up from the bed. “I’ll bring your plate in here. Try and listen to the wind.” She smiled, walking out and closing the door. Kunikuzushi scoffed, how could Kazuha’s ‘spirit’ be here? Wouldn’t it just be in the ground? As much as he hated believing in things like this, he listened to the wind. He wanted to hear Kazuha. It sounded so stupid, but he wanted to hear him. As Kunikuzushi closed his eyes, he only heard the faint breeze outside. How would he know it was Kazuha? He focused, gripping onto the bedsheets. Suddenly, something hit the window. He flinched, opening his eyes and checking the glass. It was a maple leaf. The way it was on the window, the tip was pointing downward to the nightstand. Kunikuzushi hurriedly checked around it, eventually opening the drawer. He looked around, until he found a piece of paper folded into a square. As he picked it up, the leaf flew away. Kunikuzushi sat on the ground, opening it up.
If you’re reading this, then I must be dead.
This is for Kunikuzushi, if you are not him, then please give this to him.
To Kunikuzushi:
My darling, I’m sorry that it had to come to this. I do not know what my fate was, but whatever takes me away from you is terrible in my eyes. I’m sorry that I had to leave you, I wish I could stay with you forever. However, the world must have different plans for me.
I hope you the best in your travels, and I hope you meet many new companions. I will try my best to follow you where ever I go, whenever that be in the wind or in the clouds, I will always be on your side.
I love you, Kuni.
Love, Kazuha.