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All four of Stephanie’s friends were looking at her with expressions that ranged from disbelieving amusement to concerned bafflement. (Except Dee, who seemed thrilled at all the new gossip potential she was just given). All of their reactions were honestly pretty fair. She had just burst into their regular meeting place, a hipster little coffee shop close to Rutgers that was mostly decent but got bonus points for being cheaper than Starbucks, ranting about the confusing relationship status of her roommate.
Josh lowered his cup and locked eyes with her.
“You think, if I’m understanding this correctly, that Jackie Taylor is two-timing an entire soccer team’s worth of girls. That she’s running some kind of girlfriend cartel”
“You are purposely phrasing that to make me sound insane!”
“No, no. You did that on your own when you came in here and immediately started on about how your roommate is basically the second coming of Lou Bega” Lin argued.
“I think he’s still alive? Whatever. You’re missing my point. It’s not that I think she’s cheating on a bunch of girls, it’s that I can’t figure out who the hell she’s dating and I know she’s dating one of them”
“Really? Just like how you know that Mr. Goreman is secretly a serial killer?“ Josh deadpanned.
“He was creepy! Also, who the fuck has the name Goreman? He was a murderer, you’re all fucking sheep. But no. It’s because I’ve heard her mention a girlfriend in passing and it has to be one of them. The way she acts around them it just has to be!”
“Didn’t all of these girls survive in the wilderness together? Their boundaries are probably just a little out of whack because of that” Lin pointed out.
“True. They’ve probably, like, trauma bonded. I saw this TikTok the other day- What? Hey! Don’t roll your eyes at me! It’s legit psychology, okay?”
“I know what trauma bonding is, Raf. We all have social media. And I thought that at first, too! But I heard her on the phone making plans for Valentine’s Day and she said, and I quote, ‘better than celebrating in the wilderness’. If she and her gf spent last Valentine’s Day in the wilderness, it’s one of them, and I now need to know who”
“No, you don’t”
“I do. And you’re going to help”
“How? We don’t know any of the girls except Jackie, and we only kind of know her through you. I am, of course, all in -just to clarify- but how will this work” Dee piped up.
“I’ve compiled evidence-“
“Oh my fucking god”
“I’ve compiled evidence and we’re going to review it”
-
Stephanie was imagining a lot of different outcomes when she had been told she’d be rooming with a survivor of flight 2525. A nervous wreck, perhaps. Someone who flinched at loud noises and who would wake up in the middle of the night from terrors. Or maybe the most terrifying girl she’d ever meet. You had to be pretty tough to survive in the wilderness, right?
What she was not expecting was a small preppy looking blonde to bounce into the room. The girl rocked back on her heels and looked around with wide eyes that immediately lit up upon seeing her. Steph gave an awkward little wave that the girl cheerfully returned with a smile.
“Heya! I’m Jackie, you must be Stephanie”
“That’s me, and just Steph is fine. Nice to meet you. Sorry, I already kinda chose a side of the room. My parents wanted me to move in as soon as possible. We can still switch if you want”
“No big! I’m the one getting here on the last possible day. Getting everyone together to help was suuuuch a process”
“Scheduling sure is a bitch. It was sheer luck that my siblings had the free time to come early with us. My mom wasn’t gonna budge on getting here opening day so it’s good that it just happened to work out for them as well. Your whole family wanted to come see you off?”
“Yeah, you could say that” Jackie said with a laugh.
“Jackie, can you get the door? It’s your shit I’m carrying here!” A voice called from the hallway.
“Sorry, Van!”
Jackie hurried to the door and quickly opened it, allowing another girl to step into the room. A red-haired girl entered the room and went to go put the box down while Jackie searched for something to keep the door open. Steph observed them both and quickly pieced together that Van must have been one of the other survivors, mostly due to the large scars covering the girl’s face. Genius detective work.
“Did these boxes grow heavier on the drive over or something. Fucking hell”
“I can go move the car closer so we don’t have to walk as far”
“Please and thank you, Tai”
A punk-looking girl with shaggy blonde hair and a sick as hell leather jacket stumbled into the room, dropping a box onto the floor carelessly. She was followed by two other girls, a geeky looking blonde and the one who had been addressed as Tai.
“I’m just gonna set this down by your bed for now, Jax”
“Sounds good”
“Put it all on top of her bed so she has a reason to get it done” A new voice joked.
“Gee thanks, Shauna”
“Hey! I’m doing you a favor here. If it’s not an immediate hindrance to you then it’s not getting done”
“So not true”
“You would have gotten fuck all packed if we didn’t help you, man” Natalie laughed.
“She says it with love of course” A soft voice teased, coming into view. This new addition to the room looked just as soft as her voice, with shoulder-length honey-blonde hair and the biggest, brightest blue eyes Steph had ever seen. Along with her was an incredibly tall brunette.
Steph was silently thankful that they were given a pretty decent-sized room as there were now eight girls, nine including her, crowded inside of it. The benefits of getting randomly assigned to room with someone that the housing board was sympathetic to.
Steph sat back down on her bed and leaned against her headrest to let the girls work without her in the way.
“Do you think we should start unpacking stuff too or just get everything up first?” Shauna asked.
“Probably just get everything up first. I don’t know how long putting stuff away will take and I can finish that on my own if I need to” Jackie replied, a slight frown forming at the end of her sentence.
The eight girls had sobered a bit from their joking around and were now looking a little sad. The mention of Jackie being on her own must have been the first time the group had processed the fact that they would be splitting up at the end of the day. Or, at least, standing in this dorm room and bringing in her stuff was the most tangible this realization had been.
“Let’s get to work then. I believe free lunch was promised once everything was brought up”
“Since when did it change from getting lunch to getting free lunch?”
“Since you agreed to pay for it as thanks for us helping?” Van smiled sweetly at Jackie, who just shoved her shoulder and laughed.
“Trying to turn me into a broke college student before the first day? Way rude, Palmer”
“You do like your cliches” Misty chimed in.
“I can make it free for all of us” Lottie spoke up, waving a card in the air.
“We may not have won nationals but at least we won that lawsuit” Nat said with an approving nod from where she was reclined on Jackie’s bed. The punk had shoved off the couple of boxes that had been placed on it like a disgruntled cat that refused to let you put things on your own counter. Equally like a cat, she was trying to avoid Jackie’s hand as the other girl tried to mess up her hair for dumping her stuff on the floor.
“If we want food, we should finish this up before every place around here is closed” Laura Lee pointed out.
“Ugh. I can’t believe we have to do shit in order to actually get shit done. Haven’t we already done the whole working overtime for food thing?”
“Everything’s a trade-off, dude. No such thing as not working for it”
“Pain and pleasure, indivisible” Van agreed solemnly, getting a weird look from Steph but the other girls seemed used to it.
“We really need to teach you all how to talk like human beings again instead of monologuing villains now that we’re back in polite society” Tai said.
“I was just repeating a quote”
“No one knows your references, Van”
“You all watched Hellraiser with me!”
“We’ve seen it once? Did you think we’d be able to recognize lines from memory?” Shauna looked at Van disbelievingly.
“It’s like you guys don’t even care that the lament configuration can give you an experience beyond limits” Van shook her head sadly.
“I don’t know what she’s saying”
“She’s not saying anything. It’s not even words, she’s just making things up. I know this because I know words” Shauna asserted.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. My references are mainly for me anyway. I’m my own target demographic and anyone else who gets it is just a casualty”
“That’s the spirit!”
“That being said, you all are watching Hellraiser one through four with me the next time I get to decide on movie night”
“There are four of them!?” Tai asked in surprise.
“No”
“Oh, thank god”
“There are ten. We’ll have to split it up between a couple of my movie nights”
“I’m fine with it, I like horror movies, I just can’t quote em from memory” Nat shrugged. The others nodded in agreement.
“I’m excited! I liked the one movie series you showed us about the nightmare guy” Laura Lee said happily.
Van reached out and emphatically high-fived the tall blonde.
“Hell yeah! Nightmare on Elm Street is fucking awesome!”
“I can’t believe I’m the one the only one who came out of this not wanting to pay to see scary things” Tai groaned.
“Any horror movie night we subject you to, you can pay us back tenfold” Promised Misty.
“All the action, comedy, and romances you want! We’ll watch without complaint” Agreed Lottie.
“I’ll take it” Tai sighed.
Jackie patted Tai on the back and smiled reassuringly at her.
The girls spent the afternoon bringing up boxes and unpacking them, chatting with each other and occasionally including Steph as well. Steph enjoyed just watching them joke around and interact with each other. They were clearly a tight-knit group of friends and it was funny to watch them banter together. The playful teasing didn’t do anything to hide the genuine care the eight had for each other.
-
“You’re just describing move-in day. That was like, ages ago. What’s the point of telling us this?”
“It’s called setting the scene. I’m introducing all the key players so you can recognize them going forward. Now hush”
-
The hour was close to hitting 9 as the girls finished the final touches to Jackie’s side of the room. There were a couple of posters and trinkets, but the most noticeable change was a corkboard overflowing with Polaroid pictures. Most of the people in the photos were easily identifiable as the eight girls in the room. The majority of the pictures, in fact, were basically just the eight of them.
With all of the boxes cleared from her bed, Jackie was finishing the final touches of putting her sheets on. She finished and clapped her hands twice in a small giddy celebration.
“Is that it? Are we done?” Misty asked, sprawled out on the floor, her head resting in Lottie’s lap.
“So dramatic,” Shauna nudged her with her foot and Misty continued to not beat the drama queen allegations as she clutched her heart and looked up at Shauna with big puppy dog eyes, mumbling about being kicked like the football. “But yeah we’re done here. Right, Jack?”
“I think so! Nice job guys” Jackie smiled at all of them.
“I guess since we’re done here, we can finally go get some food” Laura Lee said as she reached down to pull Misty off the floor.
“Food! Food! Food!” Van started chanting, Lottie, Jackie, and Nat quickly joining her while Tai rolled her eyes at all of them.
“Yeah, yeah, time for food. Come on, back in the car, losers. Let’s go find out what’s still open” Tai randomly grabbed at the closest girl, catching onto Shauna’s flannel jacket, and tugged at her in an effort to get them all moving.
The girls started to filter out of the room except for Jackie.
“Give me one second, guys. I’ll be right out” Jackie said.
“Take your time”
“Don’t take your time. I’m hungry”
“It’ll be a second. And you called Misty dramatic”
“She is”
“I am”
“It’s infecting all of us I think”
“They sadly couldn’t give us a vaccination for that in recovery”
“I am this close”
“To what? The ground?”
Tai immediately wrapped an arm around Misty to hold her in place as Lottie backed up with a bark of laughter, the other joining in as well.
“Alright, no fighting inside the building, take it outside. Go. Get. I’ll be right there”
Jackie made a shooing motion at them and then turned to her.
“I just wanted to exchange numbers real quick, just in case”
“Sounds good to me”
Jackie turned her phone on and Steph glimpsed her lock screen. It was obviously a picture of her and Shauna but they were both still super young in it. The two likely not even double digits at the time of the photo, their arms wrapped around each other and wide smiles on their face.
“You two have known each other for a long time?”
“Hm?”
“Sorry, sorry. Not trying to be weird, I just saw your lock screen. That’s Shauna, right?”
“Oh! Yeah, we have. Childhood besties”
“Cute”
“Weren’t we” Jackie gave her a cheeky grin. “Shauna and I go way back. We met in pre-school and have been inseparable ever since”
They exchanged numbers and Jackie waved as she headed out.
“See you later, Steph! Nice meeting you”
“You too. Have fun”
It was a couple hours later, past the point when Steph had decided to turn in for the night when her roommate came back. She could hear the door opening and the sound of a couple people walking in. It sounded like less than eight, so some of the other girls must have already left, but one or two must have stuck around.
“Careful, looks like the roomie is already asleep”
Some more footsteps.
“You gonna join me, Shipman? One more sleepover for the road?”
“One more cuddle session with the Jackie Taylor. It’d be like denying an invite from the queen”
“Shut up, nerd” There was some quiet giggling, a beat of silence, and then the noise of them both getting into bed.
“I’m gonna miss you guys”
“We’ll visit. And soon the holidays come around we’ll all be back together. It’ll be good for all of us to relearn how to not be glued together and make some new friends”
Steph snorted quietly at how unconvinced Shauna sounded about what was coming out of her own mouth.
“Healthy boundaries are overrated. We survived without them”
“Fair. But our psychiatrists will get off our back about codependency for a bit at least”
“True”
“I’m gonna miss the fucking hell out of you, Jackie. We all will. But you’ll have fun here. Make friends and take classes you want and be whoever Jackie Taylor wants to be. And I want that for you”
“I want that for you too, when it’s your turn”
“I love you”
“I love you too”
The next morning, Jackie was alone in her bed. Shauna must have gotten up early to get out. The only sign the other girl was there was that clutched in her hands, half hidden under the covers, Jackie was holding tight to a red flannel.
-
“Friends cuddle all the time”
“It’s about looking at it as a whole. Her lock screen, them cuddling, having trouble separating. It sounds like it’s Shauna, right?”
“Considering you’re bothering us about this, you clearly don’t think so” Josh mumbled.
“You were supposed to agree” Steph pouted.
“It sure does sound like Jackie is dating Shauna” Rafida said, playing it up to go along with what Steph had clearly been fishing for.
“And you’d be right! But also, wrong. Because then there was this,”
-
Steph was a bit nervous about rooming with a person who had survived as much as her roommate had.
And clearly, Rutgers University was equally worried because Steph had been given pamphlets on trauma and how to help a plane crash survivor before they were set to start living together. They had even recommended sensitivity training courses for her just to be extra safe. She figured they didn’t want a scandal in the local news if one of the famed YellowJackets dropped out in the first week because her roommate started doing Ricky Gervais impressions.
With that in mind, Steph and Jackie were getting along fine. There were some minor bumps in the road (Jackie discovered Steph’s visceral hatred of strongly scented candles and Steph learned that Jackie despised cold temperatures and liked to keep the room warm) but they got along well. They were both flexible to change and Steph hadn’t accidentally triggered any PTSD in the girl with an ill-timed joke. Success!
Retrospectively, Steph thought they had targeted the wrong people. It was some of the other freshmen who were not as sensitive to her new friend. Gossip was fast to spread about her. What the girls did in the wilderness, jokes about rituals and orgies. Rumors of cannibalism being the go-to favorite for the immature ones. For the most part, they kept their comments to themselves, making sure Jackie wasn’t around for it. Some, however, started getting bolder.
At the dining hall, some boy figured it would be funny to ask Jackie if she enjoyed the food even if it was so different than what she was used to since she probably preferred her meals with fava beans and a nice chianti. Jackie hadn’t taken the comment well and Steph really didn’t blame her. Having a stranger insinuating you ate people was a dick move. (Steph was a little shocked that Jackie knew a Silence of The Lambs reference and almost asked, but quickly decided that would probably also be a dick move).
Stephanie hadn’t learned those specific details about what the boy had said until Jackie told her later, though, because up until then, everything she learned was from a phone call she had accidentally overheard between Jackie and Tai. And it really was an accident!
Steph had been in their room, studying with her headphones on, and hadn’t even heard the door to the room open. Nor had she heard Jackie shove her way into the room, flop down onto her bed, and start a phone call with Tai. Realizing that Steph couldn’t hear her over her music, Jackie must have decided to put the call on speaker because suddenly Steph’s headphones were dead and she was now privy to the conversation between the two.
Doing the mental calculations, she figured it would be more awkward to take her headphones off and resolved to just pretend she still couldn’t hear anything.
“Breathe, baby. In and out. I’ll guide you. Breathe in, 2, 3, 4. Hold for 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. And out for 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1” Tai counted slowly, guiding Jackie through a couple more rounds.
“You feeling any better?”
“A little. I just wish they wouldn’t treat it as a joke”
“I know, sweetie”
“It’s almost worse when they joke about it. Like I expect people to be nosy and have questions but to treat it like a fucking joke?”
“Some people have shitty boundaries and think everything is open season”
“Right, he said some bullshit about just having a dark sense of humor. Fuck off”
“It’s hard. I know it’s hard. You’re surrounded by idiot college boys who think they’re the funniest fuckers on this planet but you’ll make it through. You’ve survived so much Jax, you shouldn’t have had to, none of us should have, but you have. And you’ll keep surviving. Actually, you’ll do better than just survive. And we’ll be there with you as you get through this”
“Thanks, Tai. It feels so fucking hard some days. You’d think this would be easier, not having to hunt for food and all, but somedays it just feels worse”
“It’s a different kind of fight, that’s for sure. The wilderness may have been cruel but it didn’t have expectations. Did she tell you? Lottie had to meet with investors and afterward said she preferred facing down the bear”
“Seriously? I shouldn’t laugh, I feel bad for her, but oh my God”
“She said that at least the bear had something behind its eyes that indicated a soul”
That got them both laughing.
“None of us are adjusting perfectly. As much of a struggle as it was, we did adapt to being out there. Having to come back to normal sleep schedules and work that needs to get done is taking its toll on all of us”
“Yeah… God it feels fucked up to say but I do miss some of the freedom”
“I think we all do. We found one positive of being out there, one that I truly think let us get through the hard parts, and looking back it stands out”
“It does. Some of the bad parts, they’ve gotten fuzzy, like my brain is trying to scramble the signal on them. Sometimes I get hit with flashbacks that are crystal clear, but most of the time it feels like a blur. The strongest feeling that stuck was just… being”
“I know. It’s like an unconscious part of me that my body aches for on some days. Something wordless and imageless that tags along with me when I’m doing anything. But it won’t feel like that forever. We’ll find new freedoms to replace the old”
“Hopefully. How have you been doing?”
“Good. Missing you”
“Awww, softie” Jackie had a goofy grin on her face.
“Only for some. I’m liking my classes so far”
“How’s your roommate?”
“Haven’t really talked with her. Or anyone here”
“Has anyone been giving you a hard time?”
Steph had never heard Jackie’s voice go so hard before.
“Nah, nothing like that. People just seem nervous around me, probably think I’m gonna snap or something”
“Previous point, people suck”
“People suck” Tai agreed.
“Not you though” Jackie quickly amended.
Tai laughed on the other end.
“Our school has a debate club that I’m looking at joining, which will either net me a couple people to talk to. Or set in stone that I’m to be feared. Whichever happens, happens”
“You are one hundred percent to be feared but you are also wonderful and I know that you’ll make friends at your school who recognize how smart and delightful you are to be around. People suck but sometimes they’re also slow. Give them some time to catch up and see your brilliance”
“Thanks, Jack”
“Of course. Thanks again to you too, Tai. You guys really get me through more often than not”
“We’re a team, baby girl. We all get each other through equally. It’s perpetual motion, we keep each other going”
“Hell yeah. We break physics”
“Something like that”
“I’ll talk to you later, Tai”
“Bye, Jax. Love you”
“Love you, too”
-
“Awww. Poor thing” Dee said sadly.
“That sucks. People are such assholes”
“It sounds like Taissa was just being a good friend and comforting her”
“She called her baby girl”
“Comforting her, albeit in a slightly homoerotic manner, but comforting her” Lin amended. “Some people in the south call their friends and family pet names”
“They’re from fucking New Jersey”
“I don’t know! In Wynonna Earp they use it platonically. Friends can call each other baby girl”
“Normalize calling your totally platonic lesbian bestie baby girl”
“None of you ever call me baby girl”
“Sorry, baby girl”
“Ew, nevermind”
“Can we get back to me, please”
“Fine”
-
Steph was startled from her nighttime routine of scrolling through Twitter by a knock at the door.
“Hello?”
“Hey Steph, is Jackie in?”
Recognizing the voice to be Van’s, Steph got up to open the door and saw her and Tai standing there holding takeout.
“No, sorry. She had to stay after class to talk with one of the teachers. He’s one of the ones who will keep you trapped there for a long ass time while he talks so she could be back here in 15 minutes or 15 days”
“Yikes”
“Right? Since it’s late and he knows she won’t have any classes it might be a while”
“Do you mind if we wait here for her?”
“Not at all. I’m starting to think we should just make copies of our keys for all of you guys” Steph joked.
“Jackie tried” Tai admitted.
“Of course she did”
“Turns out the cutters take the whole ‘do not duplicate’ thing seriously. Who knew”
She made some more small talk with Van and Tai before excusing herself to go do her actual nighttime routine in the bathroom. She turned the shower on to let it heat up and continued her social media binging. One of the downsides to their dorm was that the shower took an insanely long time to heat up. Steph sat down on the floor and leaned against the door to wait, and heard Tai and Van talking through the door.
“She probably wouldn’t hear us over the shower”
“Probably” Tai stated dubiously.
“It depends on you”
“You shut your mouth, Vanessa Palmer”
“I’m just saying!”
“Steph’s one door away”
“So were your parents, that didn’t stop us then”
“Desperate times and desperate measures. The perk of being an adult is not having to do shit like that”
“Can’t argue with that. But it could be fun. Old times and what not”
“Old times, says the barely 20-year-old to another barely 20-year-old”
“I get nostalgic easily”
“Is that why you still have that metal hunk in your house?”
“Hey! Some things look better on CRT TVs than they do on 4k ones and I’ll die on that hill”
“I don’t think that’s true but okay”
“It is! Some graphics were designed to respond better to the beams instead of having a fixed grid of pixels. The line sharpness can accentuate lower quality instead of letting it blend together and smooth out! Trust me, when we get back I’ll show you, hey, wait, are you trying to distract me?”
“Me? You did that all on your own, Clifford. Don’t pout, come on tell me more about your retro TV supremacy while we wait”
-
“Wait. Your roommate isn’t even in this story” Lin interrupted.
“Well, yeah”
“I thought the whole point was that you’re trying to figure out who her girlfriend is! Or if she’s created a girlfriend monopoly or something” Josh said in exasperation.
“But that’s the thing! My two front runners for the GoT, that’s Girlfriend of Taylor for the uninitiated, were Shauna and Taissa. And then this happened”
“So, you think it’s a girlfriend oligopoly between Jackie and Tai”
“Literally what the fuck, Raf”
“So it’s Shauna, then,” Interjected Lin. “If some interactions with Tai were throwing off your radar, but Taissa and Van are clearly dating based on that conversation, then your answer is Shauna. The lock screen, the cuddling, the visiting. It’s gotta be Shauna”
“Not so fucking fast, speed racer. Cause then this shit happened”
-
Jackie Taylor’s wardrobe was a mess.
Not that you could tell by looking at her.
When she went to class, her outfits were relatively consistent. Button-up shirts paired with jeans and the occasional sweater vest. Standard. Gay and kind of giving the vibe of a single dad going to a parent-teacher conference, but standard.
As her roommate, however, Steph had the pleasure of seeing her in casual wear, and better yet, the inside of her closet. And it sure was something.
Polo Shirt and Khaki Taylor’s closest was filled with all kinds of shit. Leather jackets, sundresses, way too many flannels, furry crop tops, checkered skirts, and so many other random pieces. None of it looked like what Jackie would usually wear. In fact, it didn’t look like a wardrobe that any one human would wear. It just looked like someone played roulette at their local mall.
The weirdest part? Jackie actually did wear most of it. When they went to the movies, she threw the leather jacket on over a bright yellow dress. She’d wear a black choker and studded bracelets with a Rodgers & Hammerstein t-shirt and cargo pants to lunch. Just hanging around the room she’d have on a Brown University sweatshirt and a pair of checkered soccer shorts. (The fact that she happened to look good in all of it was mildly infuriating).
It had become a sort of game, seeing what random clothing and accessories would make an appearance in Jackie’s casual wear. Would it be the #8 soccer jersey or the #1? The plaid skirt or the cuffed denim shorts? She had tried to see if there was a pattern to what Jackie would choose but it seemed random.
The most pressing curiosity for Steph was when and how Jackie acquired all of it. She had been shopping with Jackie before and never saw her buy anything outside of her usual realm of style. She never saw the girl come in with any unusual shirts or shoes from an outing. One day Jackie would just walk in and be wearing black leather boots with red laces and an acid-wash denim jacket. She trusted her roommate but she had also seen Single White Female so she was getting a little nervous.
She got her answer, partially at least, on the day that Lottie Matthews came to visit.
Lottie was one of the more quiet of Jackie’s friends, at least in comparison to the others. Most of the time while the others were being loud and dicking around, Lottie would be silently watching them with her big brown doe eyes, observing fondly and occasionally offering a quick-witted jab or affectionate comment.
Not as loud or boisterous as Jackie’s other friends. But just as prone to mischief.
Steph was walking through the Quad, a cup of coffee in hand when she heard giggling coming from nearby. Wondering who in their right mind could be feeling an ounce of joy during finals week, she looked over and saw her roommate and her tall friend. She wasn’t exactly sure what they were doing, but it looked like Lottie was trying to subtly throw snowballs at passersby without getting caught. Jackie seemed to have tried to stop her at first but was now commentating like she was watching a game on tv. Lottie closed one eye and tried to line-up a shot, but before she could let loose on the random teenage boy trying to enjoy a peaceful day, she was stopped short by a snowball hitting the back of her head.
Lottie slowly turned to where Jackie was grinning at her innocently. Lottie raised an eyebrow at the smaller girl and Jackie responded by raising both of hers in turn. A silent conversation passed between them that ended when Jackie gave a soft smile and nod of approval. Lottie hesitated a moment longer, but when Jackie threw more snow in her face, she took that for the consent it was and fired back.
Shaking her head in amusement at their antics, Steph continued on to go study and warm up in their room.
It wasn’t long after when Jackie and Lottie finally came back inside. Lottie was carrying Jackie inside and Steph got the impression that the taller girl had simply lifted her up and moved her back in to end their little snowball fight. Being set down on her feet, Jackie quickly shucked off her snow-soaked outer clothes, Lottie grabbing towels from a cabinet first and then following suit. Jackie was left in just a tank top and shorts, Lottie in a camisole and boxers, still shivering and damp from the outside. They sat pressed together on Jackie’s bed and Lottie moved to help dry Jackie off with one of the towels but it quickly devolved into them gently wrestling on the bed as the tall brunette kept tousling her hair.
Lottie pinned the smaller girl down and rubbed at her with the towel the same way one would go about drying off a rambunctious golden retriever, Jackie laughing and batting at her.
Finally relinquishing her hold, Lottie gave Jackie’s cheek a quick kiss and then got up to grab a sweatshirt and sweatpants. She tossed it on and turned to Jackie.
“You want me to grab you a sweatshirt?”
“I’m good” Jackie smiled.
“You sure?”
“Yup”
“Okay” Lottie frowned, looking a little confused but went to go back to cuddle in bed with her.
As soon as Lottie got within grabbing distance, Jackie tugged at her sweatshirt in a very clear take-it-off motion. Lottie immediately caught on and sighed in fake annoyance while Jackie grinned goofily at her.
“We’re in your room! With all of your things!”
“Please?”
“Fine”
Lottie took off the sweatshirt she just put on, tossed it in Jackie’s face, and went to grab a new one. Jackie eagerly put on her freshly stolen prize, the sweatshirt dwarfing her due to the size of its original owner.
“You are so lucky you look cute in that” Lottie nudged Jackie over and got under the covers with her.
-
“So her wardrobe is full of clothes she stole from her girlfriend, presumably one Lottie Matthews?”
“You saw her take clothes from Lottie, but was it just that one time? Maybe she takes clothes from all her friends. I know you said Lottie’s a little eccentric but surely not every non-Jackie wardrobe choice is hers. She has to be taking from other sources”
“Oh god, I was gonna make a Buffalo Bill joke. Is that insensitive? It’s not because I think she killed anyone or anything it’s just we were talking about Silence of The Lambs and now we’re talking about taking women’s clothes. Am I problematic? I’m so sorry”
“Cancelled”
“Fuck”
“I’m going to ignore Raf-“
“You can try”
“And ask if it’s that unusual for friends to share clothes. I’ve borrowed stuff from friends several times” Josh stated.
“It’s not super weird, but dude, it’s like, half her fucking closest”
“It’s also kind of a couple thing. Sharing clothes. I love stealing my boyfriend’s sweaters” Dee chimed in.
“It can be a couple’s thing. But again, you don’t know that all of it was taken from Lottie. It sounds like Jackie has clothes from all of them. You saw her taking Lottie’s sweater, but some of the other stuff you mentioned matched the other girls as well”
“I know. That’s what I’m confused about. It seemed like a girlfriend move for Lottie to give her the sweatshirt, and the vibes when she was doing it were hella fucking romantic, but again, Jackie’s whole fucking wardrobe looks like a looting”
“So, Lottie is a potential candidate based on acting like a girl-boyfriend when she gave her the sweater. But we don’t know for sure because if the other clothes in Jackie’s wardrobe are from the other girls as well then that means it’s just a friend thing” Lin summarized, looking like she was getting a migraine just from wrapping her head around it all.
“Which puts us right back at square fucking one” Josh finished.
Stephanie screamed into her hands.
-
As previously mentioned, Steph had prepared for her roommate’s unique situation. She had resolved to be the absolute best, most accepting roomie Jackie Taylor would ever have. She had read all kinds of books on common trauma responses and the best approach to help someone and was fucking ready.
If Jackie was feeling isolated and withdrawn? Steph would invite her to get lunch together, or maybe order in.
If Jackie wanted to be alone for a bit? Steph had multiple friends living on campus she could stay with for a time if the girl wanted some space.
If Jackie was easily startled by loud noises? Steph practiced making her footsteps loud to not startle her.
If Jackie had nightmares? It wasn’t like she was getting a full night’s sleep in college anyway, so she’d be there to comfort and reassure.
She was pretty confident that she could handle almost anything her roommate would be going through.
She was not prepared for singing.
In Jackie’s defense, she was a damn good singer. Her voice was soft and light, but with a hint of raspiness that added a lot of appeal. She also had banging taste in music. It was an odd mix of songs across a wide range of genres (classic rock one day and show tunes the next) but good regardless. Steph genuinely enjoyed listening to the other girl sing in the shower or hum light tunes to herself while she worked. The blonde never overdid it and was never super loud about it, so Steph was fine with it.
It also made it easy to tell when Misty was around. Steph had learned tells for when each of Jackie’s friends were visiting. She could tell Shauna was over if she could hear Beaches playing, or she would know that Laura Lee was visiting if a lone teddy bear was sat on Jackie’s bed. When Misty visited? The singing in the dorm room ramped up.
Finding out that Misty was a theater kid was not at all a shock to Steph, but it was a shock to find out that Jackie was too. She guessed it was only through Misty’s influence, but it was still surprising when Jackie was able to catch references to Cyrano and Starmites as well as Sweeney Todd.
Often times, when Misty visited, she and Jackie would have a little jam session throughout the day. Misty was a good singer and the two harmonized gorgeously so, again, Steph remained unbothered by it. It was fun to listen to, and they sometimes playfully dance around the room while singing a duet which was honestly adorable. One time Jackie even busted out an acoustic guitar which did something to Steph that she really didn’t want to dwell on.
Steph had been out grabbing lunch with her friends and was heading back to her room when she heard soft strumming coming from inside the dorm. A telltale sign that one Misty Quigley was in town. Steph noticed, however, that it was just the sound of strumming and soft singing. Usually, there was a backing track in the form of one of them playing through their speaker blasting. This time it was just lone strings and a singer.
Gently opening the door to not disturb them, Steph’s heart melted at the sight she was greeted with.
Laying on the bed, Jackie and Misty were cuddled up together. Jackie was sitting in between Misty’s legs, leaning her head back against her chest while she played, Misty’s arms wrapped securely around her waist. She instantly recognized the song and wondered how strongly the two girls related to it.
Jackie had her eyes closed as she played and hadn’t noticed Steph enter, but Misty did, giving a slight smile and a tilt of the head in greeting. Steph nodded back but couldn’t help but feel like she was intruding on a private moment. It was a shared room but their position and the soft way Jackie sang, clearly singing to Misty despite facing away, felt incredibly intimate.
As she finished, Jackie, her head still leaned against Misty’s chest, tilted her head to face her friend (? Girlfriend? Choosing a song like that…) and slowly opened her eyes. Steph waited for Jackie to register her presence, but she still didn’t, her sole focus on the curly-haired girl holding her.
“Gorgeous” Muttered Jackie.
“I should be the one saying that after that performance. I’d give you a standing ovation, but…”
“Standing ovations are overrated, I prefer kneeling ones”
Jesus Christ. Those words along with the look Jackie shot Misty as she said it definitely made Steph feel like she should not be in the room. Even Misty seemed a touch flustered as she reached up to readjust her glasses.
“You were good but not that good. You’ll have to work a little harder for that” Misty teased.
“Boo. What do I have to play to earn the coveted Quigley approval?” Jackie tilted her head further up, nosing at Misty’s jawline, basically headbutting the little geek’s chin.
“If you have to ask, you’re already starting off wrong. Come on, play something else you think I’ll like. Feed me, Seymour”
As Jackie started playing again, Steph slipped out of the room, tripping on her own feet in her haste to leave the scene. She wondered if Jackie ever even noticed she was there in the first place.
-
“Your next big post-it on our grand conspiracy board is… singing a song?”
“There were looks! Looks, I say! And that comment was not very friend sounding!” Stephanie cried.
“It was probably just a joke. I think you’re embellishing” Josh mumbled.
“Hozier is lesbian bait, though” Lin pointed out.
“Exactly! There is no fucking chance any human being is singing fucking Work Song to their friend. Like, who goes, ‘Hey friend, let me play you this incredibly gay love song, you know, as friends!’ No one!”
“She was singing her a love song and made a joke about oral. Point for Misty being the one?”
“That’s only two kind-of points for Misty. Shauna still had the most racked up. I’m sticking with Shauna”
“Both of your current guesses are about to get blown out of the fucking water after I tell you this story”
-
Steph threw open the door and stumbled into the room, feeling gross and sticky. She had just run across campus in the blistering New Jersey sun, making a rare appearance on one of the few not overcast days, and was drenched in sweat.
She briefly considered flopping down on her bed but reconsidered when she thought about having to wash her sheets and changed directions towards the bathroom instead. A nice cold shower it would be, even if she could hardly stand up.
She went to grab the handle to the bathroom but paused as she realized she could already hear the shower going. Damn, Jackie must have gotten in and had the same thought as her. Guess she’d have to wait. Still not wanting to dirty her bed, Steph laid down on the floor and closed her eyes.
“I’m just saying, I really think it’s not a coincidence that you need eight people”
“I can’t believe you convinced me to join you just so you could trap me in a box and talk about anime”
“Final Fantasy XIV isn’t anime it’s a critically acclaimed MMORPG” Jackie insisted, Nat mouthing the last part silently along with her after having heard it so many times. “A full raiding party is eight people, Nat! It’s perfect!”
“What dungeon are you stuck on and how do you think seven inexperienced people will help you?”
“Alexander” Jackie pouted. “Weakness debuffs are bullshit. I just need bodies to tank damage and heal, you guys will be fine. It’ll be fun! It’ll be a nice way for us to stay connected when we’re apart”
“Alright, alright. You don’t need to pull out the puppy-dog eyes I was gonna agree anyway”
“YES! I’ve already made you a Miqo'te, Laura Lee an Elezen, Misty a Lalafell-“
“Is that your roommate? She dead?”
Fatigued and slightly delirious, she had no idea how much time had passed as she blearily opened her eyes to two people standing above her, looking down at her.
“Hey roomie! Was a little worried for a second there”
Steph mumbled something incomprehensible in response.
“We just got out; you can go ahead in if you want to cool down”
“Mkay, thanks” Steph stood slowly and staggered towards the shower.
Wait a second.
Wait a fucking second.
‘We’?
Did she just say ‘WE just got out’?
Stephanie turned and looked back to where Jackie and Nat were laying on Jackie’s bed together. They were pressed close with a laptop balanced between them. Jackie was still chatting about her video game, booting it up to explain it more in depth to her friend. Nat seemed a little lost at the terms Jackie was throwing out but seemed to be trying her best to follow. It was a little hard to tell with Nat’s head leaning on Jackie’s shoulder, Jackie resting her cheek against Nat’s head in turn, but both of their hair was still definitely damp.
Maybe they showered separately? One after the other? Neither looked drier than the other though.
“You okay, Steph? You kind of look like your gonna pass out any second”
Shit, she was staring.
“I’m good. Just, uh, the heat. You know”
“Totally. It’s a pain in the ass waiting for the showers to heat up when it’s cold but damn is that good for times like these” Nat said.
“Tell me about it,” Jackie snorted. “Never thought I’d want to feel glacial ever again but holy shit”
Steph nodded, still feeling slightly insane from trying to work out what she just witnessed. She needed to get in that shower lest her brain overheat as much as the rest of her.
-
“That’s… Wow yeah I have nothing for that one” Admitted Lin.
“Uh, really? Cause I do. They were in the wilderness together. They probably had to bathe together and just no longer care about modesty”
“Oh, come on, Josh! Is your answer to all of this just going to be, blah blah blah wilderness survival blah blah blah. Like, why would they still keep showering together now!” Steph asked, looking borderline frantic.
“I’m with Lin and Steph. If I survived almost two years in the goddamn Canadian wilderness, you’d have to physically debilitate me to get me to agree to share a shower”
“Look, it’s not that I don’t see your point, but what’s more likely? That Jackie Taylor learned from the Roddy Ricch school of dating or that they’re all just a little closer than normal because of what they went through?”
“Again. I don’t think she’s dating all of them. I think she’s dating one and I want to know who but it could literally be any single one”
“After that? I’m putting my vote down for her dating Natalie, I guess. I mean what story could you possibly share that makes any of them more obviously dating Jackie than the girl who got naked with her. Nat. Final vote”
Stephanie opened her mouth and immediately everyone at the table groaned.
-
When the hour was hitting close to 1am and Jackie still hadn’t returned, Steph didn’t worry too much. It wasn’t unusual for Jackie to stay out later on the nights when one of her gal pals was visiting. They could usually only be there for a couple days and Jackie had told her how she dreaded the thought of missing out on any moment of being with them.
This weekend Laura Lee was visiting and the two had left several hours ago to browse a bookstore and get lunch. Steph had passed by and seen them later that same day, laid out on a shared blanket on the quad with their lunch, reading a book together. They hadn’t come back to the room after that and she wondered if they were still out there or if they’d relocated.
Curiosity got the best of her, as it usually does, and Steph peeked out of their blinds. Jackie and Laura were still out there, but they were no longer sitting face to face. Instead, they were now side-by-side, Laura Lee holding Jackie’s hand, guiding her outstretched arm to trace something in the air. Constellation viewing, perhaps? Still holding tight to the other’s hand, their arms lowered back to their sides and came to rest against Jackie’s thigh, Laura Lee gesturing with her free hand as she explained something.
She didn’t have a clear view of it, the angle and distance hindering her, but Jackie seemed enraptured by whatever was being said. Laura Lee leaned her head closer to Jackie’s and resumed her guide of the night sky, continuing to talk as she did so. There was a small back and forth that led to Jackie gently pushing the tall blonde until they were both laying down on their backs.
Content in knowing that her roommate was safe, Steph pulled the string and let the blinds close shut. At the last minute, she was just able to catch the two girls turning their heads to face each other and leaning in. Frantically reopening the blind to double-check what she thought she saw, Steph was met with the same sight as before. Jackie was a closer now, her head tucked against Laura Lee’s shoulder who had an arm wrapped securely around her waist, but that was all.
Just two girls laying side by side under the night sky.
-
“YOU SAW HER KISS ONE OF THEM!?! ON THE MOUTH?!! AND THIS IS ONLY BEING MENTIONED NOW?!!?? Sorry, sorry everyone. We’re all good here. Nothing to see, keep moving,” Lin held her hand up in apology then turned back to Steph. “This feels like the answer, Steph”
“I thought I saw them kiss! It could have just been them leaning close to talk more. Or maybe a cheek kiss. I couldn’t get a good angle. Wow that sounded creepy. You know what I mean”
“I still think the one she was naked in a closed space with is the girlfriend. Just me? No?” Dee asked.
“Casual lack of boundaries versus gentle intimacy, though? Laura Lee is getting my vote after that” Raf said.
“But Misty had casual intimacy with her too!”
“Technically so did Shauna and Tai”
“Fucking fuck”
“When they’re together as a group, who does Jackie normally stick close to?”
“Well, that’s the thing-“
-
“I’m just saying, I really think it’s Shauna”
Steph had gone down to the communal kitchen to get a pre-bed snack, hoping to have some alone time with Ben & Jerry, and was a tad annoyed to hear how much noise was coming from the shared area. It wasn’t a desolate hour but it was still later than when people usually hung around the commons, choosing instead to head up for the night. Her annoyance turned to intrigue as she recognized that it was Jackie and her friends crowded around the stove and counters making something.
Well, Van was clearly trying to make something. The other girls were alternating between being in her way and being given small tasks from Van to make them less in the way. It reminded her a bit of when she would give her brother an unplugged controller to keep him busy.
Van was standing at the hot plate and stirring a sauce with Lottie sitting to her left, watching, and Shauna chopping vegetables to her right. Jackie and Laura Lee sat opposite of them, making a game out of trying to steal what Shauna had finished cutting up and dodging Van, who tried to ward them off with a smack from her spatula. Tai was making a valiant attempt to clean things up as they went, but her efforts were outweighed by Misty, who was aimlessly going through cabinets and taking things out to inspect them for… some reason? Nat was just kind of chilling against the counter.
Shauna, who had been the only one even coming close to helping with her chopping skills, had dead stopped and was now looking around at the others with her hands on her hips.
“ME? What did I do?” Shauna whined.
“Your instinctual response to weaseling your way out of shit is to lie, babe” Jackie said as she tossed cut up pieces of carrot at Lottie from across the table. Lottie, who Steph had been convinced was completely zoned out, caught it in her mouth easily.
“Okay, I’ve lied a couple of times to a couple of cops and reporters. But it was for good! I used my lying skills-“
“Skills?” Tai asked in disbelief. “That’s certainly a word choice”
“For good” Shauna finished, ignoring Tai. “Misty is the one who tried to break into some guy’s phone”
“If you get to use the defense of good intentions, so do I. Being in the public space did not give him the right to be taking pictures of us”
“I’ll give Misty a pass on that. She was totally right to do that. Also, Tai’s original idea was just to smash the camera so Misty’s route was somehow less destructive” Pointed out Nat.
“You were so on board with the camera smashing thing don’t you even lie to me, Natalie” Tai said, poking Nat in the chest with her finger.
“Hell yeah I was. Every day I make the conscious choice to become worse. I’m just saying that if we’re really trying to figure out who takes the title, that’s gotta be considered” Nat said with mock seriousness. This was slightly dampened by the fact that she had moved and was now hand-feeding Shauna random things as the other girl got back to chopping. (Seriously random things. Nat was just kind of picking up whatever was on the table and shoving it in Shauna’s face to see if she’d go for it).
“Then we should also consider that Van leaves all of our laptops with like 50 million tabs open after she’s done using them”
“Remember who’s making you all dinner” Van waved her spatula around threateningly, nearly hitting Misty who had abandoned her kitchen exploration and had come between her and Lottie, standing on her tiptoes trying to peer at what was happening. “Also, that’s not even bad? How is that being compared to two legally definable crimes? It’s not even morally dubious like Shauna’s, what the hell are you on about?”
“It’s so bad” Jackie stressed.
“It’s basically an act of violence, Vaniel” Nat agreed.
“You’re in the running now, we don’t make the rules” Lottie shrugged.
“Charlie has literally stolen things! She committed crime!” Van cried.
“You committed gay”
“Weak comeback Charles”
“Bite me, Loch Ness”
Van flicked a bit of sauce at her. Lottie wiped it off with her hand and immediately shoved it back into Van’s face.
“The only thing saving you right now is a higher being and also my desire to finish preparing this fucking food” Van warned, but she was clearly hiding an amused smile.
“What if all of us are the problematic faves” Shauna wondered out loud.
“How dare you, Laura Lee could never be considered problematic”
“Thanks Nat!”
“Laur’s the cottage-core mom”
“I’ll accept being a problematic fave if I can also be the himbo” Van conceded.
“I was gonna give you short king but fine, you can have himbo”
“Misty’s the short king” Lottie said, twisting around to pat Misty’s head.
“Bitch Misty’s the tax evader, don’t even fucking lie to yourself” Argued Nat.
“Silence Hot Topic Employee” Misty fired back.
“In Nat’s defense, evolution didn’t give her built in toxins and warning signs to ward people off so she’s had to create them herself”
“My caustic personality does wonders to make up for my inability to spray blood from my eyes like a lizard”
“I, for one, am just trying my best” Jackie stated as she got up from her spot beside Laura Lee, which was quickly occupied by Nat, and made her way towards the sink. She lightheartedly bumped herself against Van and Shauna as she passed like a dog knocking against its owner’s leg in affection.
“We know this Jackie and we love you dearly” Van said, looking over her shoulder to where Jackie now was.
Jackie had adopted the new position of leaning against Tai, both of her arms coming up to wrap around the taller girl’s shoulders. Tai adapted to the additional weight at her side with ease, sparing just a moment to affectionately pat Jackie on the cheek before resuming cleaning off utensils.
“Tai’s the communist” Stated Lottie matter of fact.
“But Tai’s going into politics?” Laura Lee pointed out.
“To bring back communism. Right, Tai?”
“No further questions will be taken at this time”
“Already nailing it” Cheered Misty.
“I don’t think she’s there yet but Lottie has real thot enemy of the state potential” Mused Shauna.
Lottie looked genuinely pleased with that assertation and gave Shauna a nod of approval over Van’s shoulder. Shauna returned it with a solid thumbs up.
“I’d like to retract my claim about Misty being the tax evader” Nat leaned her elbows on the counter, resting her chin in her hands.
“I’m glad you’ve had a change of heart and seen that I’m actually incapable of doing wrong”
“Incapable of doing wrong or incapable of being proven wrong in a court of law with suitable evidence?” Tai wondered.
“Oh! The second one sounds better than what I said! I’ll take that!”
“Shauna is the tax-evader” Nat paused and made eye-contact with Misty, a slow smile spreading across her face. “Misty’s the furrycon attendee of the group”
“CATS IS NOT ABOUT FURRIES, NATALIE. WE’VE BEEN OVER THIS”
The girls continued to bicker over who took what roles as Steph watched on, silently enjoying the spectacle. Even being on the outside of it, there was something warm and comforting about watching the group of girls act so domestic together, cooking and laughing. (Ignoring the mild to severely concerning things that occasionally popped up in conversation). Disinclined to ruin the homely atmosphere between them, Steph turned around and headed back up, leaving them to their antics.
-
“She cozied up to all of them at some point, I think” Steph recalled, scratching her head.
“You can’t remember her being closer to one over the others?”
“Not really”
“I’m sorry but we’re getting nowhere with this and I have a class to get to. Steph, just ask her to tell you about her girlfriend at some point and boom! There’s your answer” Josh said, packing up his things to leave.
“I have asked questions about her girlfriend and none of the answers have been clear! I asked her what her girlfriend likes to do and I got hit with fucking soccer! All of them play soccer! I asked where her girlfriend goes to school and all she said was out of state. She gives the vaguest fucking answers, Josh. If I keep prodding, I look weird!”
“Then maybe she just prefers to be secretive about it”
“I guess. Is the moral of the story that I need to respect her privacy? Cause fine but I’m not happy about it”
“I think it is, buddy”
“I still think the moral of the story is that Tai and Jackie are colluding to create a non-competitive closed girlfriend market”
“And with that, I’m going to take my leave”
Lin stood up, following Josh’s lead and packing up their stuff as well, prompting the others to start doing the same.
“This was fun! See you guys later” Dee said cheerfully.
“See you guys”
“Bye”
“Later”
Steph waved goodbye to her friend and headed back to her room. She should probably study. Actually study. Like school stuff and not her friend’s confusing and mysterious dating life.
Steph walked into the room and saw Jackie getting changed into a clean red button-up shirt with black slacks.
“You look fancy. Got plans for the night?”
“Date night! We’re gonna celebrate a bit before Valentine’s Day so that places are less crowded”
“Solid plan. What are you guys doing?”
“Well Van really wanted to check out a horror VHS pop-up shop called Slashback so we’re gonna do that first”
“Oh! That’s cool! You and Van, huh?”
“Yeah, Van got to choose the main activity for the night. Laura was in charge of the restaurant, though, so we’re going to a nice little Korean BBQ place after”
“Makes sen- wait, what?”
“Yeah, a bit unusual for Valentine’s Day but Nat’s a soft little romantic and choose a fine dining place last year, so we’re switching it up”
Steph felt like she was gonna faint.
“Oh… Really… That’s, cool”
“Totes!”
“So you’re all going as a group?”
“Obviously,” Jackie laughed. “That’s another reason we’re celebrating early is so everyone can make it”
“Everyone” Steph repeated faintly.
“I should get going, I’m meeting up with Lottie and Van to pick up Shauna”
Oh my fucking God.
“Oh. Cool. Have fun” Steph smiled as cheerfully as she could and waved bye at Jackie as she left.
The moment the door clicked shut, Steph stifled a yell and whipped out her phone, opening her group chat in a flurry of motions.
‘YOU GUYS R NOT GOING TO FCKING BELIEVE THIS SHIT’