Work Text:
Mingyu Kim
Wonwoo Jeon
This is a letter I deserve. What I wished to receive but didn’t. I wanted to see you, but I wonder if I did not deserve even that. So, in whatever way this goes, if you choose to read this or this may grow to old age, I want to think our souls will find some way.
So, Mingyu. You have devoured my entire life. And it’s such a pity of me to have no regrets. I waited my entire life for someone like you and the love that came out of that was something I’d see in books and movies. You loved me like a fairytale. You loved like how the princesses worked their asses off to have a happy ending. You loved me like a story with a happy ending.
I see you. In every kind of way. I see you in every step I make, every breath I take. In the littlest things, I could see you.
Like how a candle would light back up once blown, it’s not at once I’d be back up again when you ruined something you broke.
I wish, this was just a long dream. Nothing happened. When I get home from work, you’d be there. When I open my front door, you’d be there.
God, do I miss you.
It’s so hard, I feel so left out. I keep on searching for you even though it’s more than clear you’re never going back to me.
Come back. Carry my bag again, open the doors for me again, forget your keys back home again, cook me dinner again, kiss me again, hug me for hours again, be in love with me again? how about that?
I wanna hear you and feel you again. On my skin, you laid.
I remember that time on that sandy beach. Sand would get stuck on our feet from playing around. Cocktails on our hands and it feels like it was just us two in this world. I would do anything to go back and stop time.
But our friends have continuously stuck on my head, I get it, fuck. You’re not coming back. They despise you, you know? But I know they miss you too.
I see your posts. You look great.
Can you wait for me? I should forget about you.
I don’t know how or if I can but I will.
God, do I have to. I should be able to.
Maybe, someday I’ll see you. I’d look you in the eye and smile and forgive you.
But now, I’m still yearning for you. I hope I’d come to my senses now. I have to let you go. As corny as it sounds, why are we the couple we laughed at for being so dramatic?
You are still such a fucking show-off.
But if some change in our fate goes upon us and I see you, and we meet each other again, I think I have so much in me to say. But I feel like I’d just keep it to myself. Because I know you have your reasons, (I’d die to know), because you always do. You’ve always been someone I look up to.
So, Migs. Babe, Bestie, Mingz. I think this would be the last you’ll hear from me.
Thank you, still. For loving me through all reasons and conditions. Though we did not beat pride, misunderstanding, and our fight, I have loved you through all of it. You’ve been great, a pain in the ass.
I don’t want to say goodbye.
So this’ll do.
I’ll let you live. See you when I do.
Wish me well,
Wonwoo Jeon