Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Names:
Harry: Red Guy
Robin: Duck
Doi: Yellow Guy
Tony: Clock
Paige: Sketchbook
Shringold
Colin: Computer
Gilbert: Globe
Laura: Laptop
Steven: Steak
Spinach
Frank: Fridge
Larry: Lamp
Terry: Briefcase
Mortimer: Coffin
Warren
Theodore/Gramps: Train
Tracy: Electricity

I personally don't like Warren and Shrignold, so they will not show up very often. Sorry to all the fans of them.

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

I stretched, yawning. I glanced at the clock on Robin and I's shared nightstand. It read 9:21. "I suppose I should get up soon," I thought, pushing off the covers.

I paused, doing a double take at my hands. They were… human? Dark brown hands were there in place of the red mittens that were supposed to be there.

The incorrect hands started shaking and an uneasy feeling settled into my stomach.

I brought the hands to my face, and that was wrong too. Hair, real hair, not yarn, fell across my forehead when I touched it. The loc landed in front of my eye. My eyes, which were supposed to be on top of my head.

I touched this strange new face, my heart beating faster with each second. Not only were my eyes settled into eye sockets on my face and not above it, but there was a nose. There were lips, not just teeth.

"Robin? Robin I'm scared. Something is wrong," my voice came out as a whisper, shaking. A tear slid down my cheek. This was all wrong!

Robin groaned, rolling over. "It's a Saturday, why are you-" he cut himself off when he opened his eyes.

He was wrong too. Instead of the charming, albeit obnoxious, duck I had grown to care about, there was a short man with green hair and pale skin.

"Harry? What… what's happening?"

"I don't know. I don't know but I don't like it." I pulled my knees to my chest, my whole body still trembling.

Robin rushed to my bed, wrapping his arms around me in a tight hug. His arms, not his wings. A quiet whimper escaped my throat.

Of all the things this damned house had put me through, changing my entire body without warning was one of the most frightening.

"Is Doi… different too?" Robin asked quietly. He tried to appear calm, but his eyes kept flickering around the room. He didn’t look at me or at himself.

"I don't know yet," I whispered. "We- We need to go check."

Robin nodded. He let go of me, allowing me to walk to Doi's bed. He had always been the most human of us, so the change was less drastic. But he was different too, different in the most frightening way.

His nose was now rounded and human instead of the teardrop-shape it was supposed to be. His head was less round, less of a circle.

I turned back to Robin. He was feeling his face. He had a mouth, not his beak. His eyes were widened with the same terror that refused to ease in my chest.

"What do we do now?" He asked.

"I have no idea." My stomach felt like it was being tied into knots. I just wanted to go to sleep and make the wrong feeling stop.

As if more needed to go wrong, I heard a crash from downstairs. Doi stirred, sitting up.

"What… What's going on? Why do you have… a face?" He asked, looking between me and Robin. His eyes were different too, farther apart, and with one brilliant blue iris and one green one, not just dots for pupils.

"We don't know. But I have a feeling we're going to find out soon," Robin said quietly.

Chapter Text

Tony's P.O.V.

I crashed down from the wall, hitting the ground with a thud.

“What in the heavens?” I asked no one in particular, standing to dust myself off.

I nearly fell over. I knit my eyebrows, looking down at my legs. I did not find my legs. Instead, there were someone else’s. My legs were like thin hoses, with no joints. Not these thick human legs, with knees and muscles.

I looked at my arms, and they were different too. The entire balance of my body had changed. It was like gravity was playing a trick on me.

“What in the heavens…” I muttered again, shaking my head. That didn’t feel right either. Normally shaking my head would involve my entire body except for my rubber hose limbs. Now there was an entire additional torso between the two.

Was this a dream? Perhaps Larry’s doing? Had I upset him recently?

“Tony! Tony, something strange is going on!” Paige’s voice yelled. I assume it was Paige who ran into the room, also appearing strangely different. Movement was typically hard for her; she often needed someone to carry her since they had no limbs of her own.

Now they appeared as a short person with a black bob. She wore an apron and black dress, with leaf and rainbow patterns along the edges.

“What happened to you? What happened to me?” I asked, hoping she would know more than I did.

“I was going to ask you the same thing,” they frowned.

Shrignold appeared behind Paige. He was much larger now, taller than Paige’s new form. His skin was still teal and he still had his signature butterfly wings. I frowned at the sight. I had never liked Shrignold anyway, and my fear and confusion did not help the matter.

My eyes widened. “Wait. Did you change in the teacher’s lounge and then come here, or were you teleported here when you changed?” I asked. Paige and especially Shrignold preferred to avoid the house.

“That’s why I came here first before going to Malcolm. Malcolm will fix me,” Shrignold muttered at the end. “I can’t get to the teacher’s lounge. It’s like it disappeared.”

He snapped a few times to demonstrate. Usually this would transport him to the lounge, where the teachers typically lived and exchanged ideas for lessons. Not that anyone’s lesson has ever gone correctly.

I frowned at the memory of my own lesson. The students had begun to age rapidly, and anything I did to try and reverse it only made things worse. I had only wanted to share my love of time and history, but it ended in disaster.

“Then where are the others?” I finally asked. Internally I also wondered what would happen to our things. I lived in the house most of the time, staying on the wall in the living area. But I still kept my things in the house, things that were important to me.

Paige shrugged. “We aren't sure. Maybe they’re still normal and only the changed ones are locked-” she was cut off by a crash. Sitting on the table where Colin the computer usually sat was a young-looking man in a brightly colored jacket. A screen on his chest spelled out “Ow!”

“What just happened?” He asked, rubbing the back of his head, which had hit the wall. His eyes snapped open, and the screen changed to read “DANGER!”

“Oh no,” he whispered.

Chapter Text

Colin’s P.O.V.

The first thing I noticed was pain. For some reason my head had slammed into the wall. I reached up to feel the damage, and was met with hair.

My eyes snapped open. I locked gazes with Tony, the talking clock. Only he wasn’t a clock anymore. He was a person, a human person, with deep blue skin.

“Oh no,” I whispered, connecting the dots. I stared down at the body I was in. The buttons and wires were gone, replaced by white and gray flesh and colorful clothes. The only reminder of my real body was the screen on my chest.

I closed my eyes, trying to retreat into my digital world. My safe space. I still had a screen, it had to be in there. I visualized all the numbers, the code that created colorful shapes, doors, and checkered flooring. If I could just get there it would all stop. I would have my real body, even if it wasn’t real. I tried desperately to find it, to get my mind out of this terrible physical form, but it just didn’t work.

I wanted to scream. Everything was unfamiliar, and my only comfort had been ripped away. But screaming would mean using this mouth, which felt wrong. The teeth were wrong, it was all wrong, it was all terrible!

I ground the teeth together. I wanted to rip myself apart, just to make it all stop. It was too overwhelming. It was like I could feel every strand of hair individually, like each physical sensation was a thousand times more potent in this fleshy human body.

The jaw hurt from grinding the teeth, and I tangled the hands into the hair, gripping it hard enough to hurt. It was all I could do not to bash my head into the wall. Maybe if I knocked myself out everything would go back to normal when I woke up.

“Colin? Colin, take some deep breaths. Box breathing, like you taught me,” my sister Laura’s voice instructed. When had she gotten here? It wasn’t important now.

I followed her instructions, taking slow deep breaths until I felt like I could unbury my face from my knees.

There were more people in the room now. Human versions of Laura and Tony were on either side of me, being careful not to touch me. I usually didn't like being touched, unless I initiated it.

I released my hair, grabbing Tony's gloved hand instead. My scalp still hurt, but I tried to ignore it. I squeezed Tony's hand, trying to ground myself. If I couldn't escape into my digital world I might as well be mentally present here.

I glanced around the room. Paige and Shrignold were standing next to the fireplace, and the students stood in the doorway.

Sitting on a large couch that hadn't been there when I plugged in last night was who could only be Gilbert and Larry.

They were all human too. I clenched my teeth again. I was starting to get used to this strange mouth, unfortunately. This wasn't right.

I glanced at the screen on my chest, trying to find some comfort in still being somewhat technological. The screen said "DANGER!" in bold red letters. I willed it to change, and it changed to display a hazard sign.

I let my shoulders relax at that. At least something was familiar.

"What the hell is going on?" The tall red student asked. Instead of being a yarn creature, he was a human with dark skin and red dreadlocks.

"We aren't sure," Tony said.

The red one groaned. "I need coffee," he muttered. He turned to go into the kitchen.

"You!" He immediately yelled. "You know what! Everyone into the living room. NOW!" He roared.

The kitchen crew entered the room, and the newer teachers trailed behind them.

"Robin, what do we even do?" The red one said desperately to the small green one, apparently Robin.

"I haven't a clue. This is an extreme break from pattern. Usually even if we're confused they know what's happening, but now we're all confused," the small one squawked. He kept clasping and unclasping his hands.

"Where are them- are they gonna sleep?" The yellow one asked. He looked young, maybe 8 years old.

"I'm not sure. I'm not sure about any of this. If the dream one wasn't also here I would assume this was a nightmare, but no," The red one groaned.

"Maybe we should have a family meeting," the green one suggested. The tall one nodded.

“Yeah. We need a plan.”

They walked into the kitchen. There was a strange feeling in my torso. I glared at it. Something told me this was not going to go well.

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V.

I walked into the kitchen, trying to calm down. I didn't like yelling. It scared Doi, and it wasn't necessary. But sometimes a situation got far too overwhelming and I couldn't bite back the words.

Right now it was either scream or cry. And I don't cry.

"We can't let them stay here," I said. We were sitting in our respective chairs, a hint of normalcy in this disaster.

"Why not?" Robin tilted his head to the side. I frowned.

"Do you remember what they did to us? Maybe a few of them can stay. The computer redeemed himself with computer day. The sketchbook seems nice enough. But the kitchen team? They aren't living in my house," I said darkly.

I had tried to escape their horrible lessons. I thought I had made it out of the June 19th time loop, only to be brought back. And everything started again on June 20th. Now the calendar read June 21st. How many years had it been June?

When I left, the kitchen team stepped in to make the worst lesson yet. As if the clock rotting our bodies while we were still conscious inside them wasn't bad enough.

They took the love of my life, removed his organs, and fooled who was basically my son into eating them. They were leaving my house or they would meet the same fate.

This human disaster was just another one of their tricks. And I refused to fall for it.

"I kind of like some of them. More friends!" Doi said cheerfully. He looked to be about 8 now.

Of course he would be the most forgiving. He was used to forgiving his father, and these damned teachers were his doing, at least at first.

“Maybe some. I guess we need to evaluate each of them, now that we’re in control for once,” I suggested.

Doi nodded thoughtfully, his eyebrows drawn together in focus. His green eye glinted in the light. “We can decide who stays, and what job they get. There are a lot of us now, that must mean more chores,” he said slowly.

I met Robin’s eyes. This was uncharacteristic of him. He was completely right; he’d broken down the situation flawlessly. It almost reminded me of that day… the one where he had batteries.

He leaned back in his chair, his usual vacant smile returning to his face. “I wonder if they like spaghetti,” he giggled. I couldn’t help but smile at him, despite everything.

“I think we should line them up, military style! Then they can argue for their survival, and we kill the losers!” Robin said, slamming a fist on the table for emphasis. Doi jumped away from him in fear.

“Sorry Doi, I got carried away there,” he said, face softening.

“Yes, you did. I like the idea of letting them argue their case. The others will just have to stay outside. We aren’t killing anyone. Well, we aren’t killing most of them,” I trailed off. That damned steak and his canned assistant couldn’t just get away without consequence.

“Let’s go meet the friends!” Doi said, running to the living room. I grabbed Robin’s hand and we followed him into the nightmare.

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

"Everyone!" I yelled, and the murmurs in the living room quieted. "Stand in a line against the wall in order of when we met you. We will go one at a time and you can tell us your name, pronouns, and why you think you deserve to stay here after all that you've done to us," I instructed, failing to keep the bitterness out of my voice.

There was shuffling as the group awkwardly formed a line. There were so many of them. Where would they even go? I sighed quietly.

One step at a time.

"Let's go," I said to Doi and Robin. We walked to the first teacher, obviously the sketchbook despite their new form.

"Hi! I'm Paige, I use she/they pronouns-" before she could continue the strange bug-person scoffed.

I glared at him. "What? She's one person, how could she be a 'they'?" He said, nose scrunched in disgust.

"Just get out. I refuse to live with someone transphobic and homophobic. And I doubt you want to stay here either. Go eat sand at your shrine or whatever it is you do," I said, pointing to the back door.

That door led to the forest where the love cult stayed, and where Robin's funeral had been. It used to be our only door, but a new one had appeared in the living room.

The furniture had also changed to accommodate more people. I frowned. I didn't like change, but everything was changing all at once. The few familiar things in the house, the unchanging rooms, were no longer unchanging.

"Gladly. You all go against Malcolm anyway. And he eats gravel, not sand, you uncultured swine!" The bug said, flying out the door.

"Good riddance," I muttered, then turned back to Paige.

"Right. Now convince us why you should get to live here," Robin demanded.

"Well, I didn't mean for everything to go so wrong. The crafts were supposed to be completely different! Like a heart card, not a real heart! But it was like I couldn't get things under control. Roy replaced all my art supplies like he wanted bad things to happen! I just wanted to give you guys a creative spark," They explained.

"Right. But even before the… crafts, you destroyed Doi's painting," I said, gesturing to the boy. He was staring at the line, counting on his hands.

I wasn't sure if I believed her story about Roy. It did seem like something he would do. But I didn’t know these teachers well enough to know that they weren't in on it.

"And you said green wasn't creative! Green is a fine color!" Robin said, pointing to his green hair aggressively. I rolled my eyes, but he did have a point. It wasn't their place to say what colors were "approved."

"Right. Well, I'm quite sorry about that. Maybe I can let the yellow one, Doi you said, use my paints. I haven't touched the green ones so if he likes green there should be plenty of options," she offered.

"Okay. That sounds fair. And creativity is important to me, so I suppose you can stay," I said carefully. I would have to keep an eye on her, but they seemed genuine. They got quite upset when they mentioned Roy touching her art supplies.

She let out a quiet sigh of relief. Was I being too aggressive?

"Yay! Painting!" Doi said.

I smiled at him, ruffling his blue hair. "You can go sit now," I said, looking back at Paige.

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

"Next!" Robin squawked. The clock cautiously stepped forward. His fists were clenched and his shoulders were tense.

"M-my name is Tony. My pronouns are he/him. As for why you should let me stay. I know my lesson went horribly wrong, and I am terribly sorry about it.

"I only meant to show how time changes things, and hair growth is a great example! But then, um, the green one didn't always have hair, so his feathers… they just started to fall out, and then I couldn't fix it, I couldn't reverse it. Time started going faster and anything I did made it worse, and it was all a disaster!" He rambled, making jerky hand movements.

"Calm down, it was a long time ago," I said. He jumped back, but nodded. At least he was aware of exactly what we were mad about.

"Right," he said slowly.

"So, you really have nothing to do with the strange way time moves here?" I raised an eyebrow. That was new. I never had eyebrows before.

"No. If I did I wouldn't just watch you suffer from the wall," he said softly.

I stared into his eyes, trying to figure out if he was being honest. He flicked his eyes around the room, his arms in a defensive position.

It seemed like he was more afraid of us than we were of him. If he was lying I could easily win a fight against him. Well, assuming he didn't still have his powers.

"Alright. Go sit," I said.

"Right away!"

Robin glared at me. "You didn't even ask my opinion! What if I hated him?"

"Do you?"

"Well, no, but- I- you still should have asked!" I chuckled. His frustrated expression was adorable.

"I will next time, don't worry."

"Good. After all, I'm the best one! My opinion is the most important," he said proudly, puffing out his chest.

"C'mon, who's next!" Doi yelled, bouncing up and down.

There was a clump of three people next in line. Finally a tall girl waved a boy in a brightly colored jacket forward.

He started to say something, but was immediately cut off.

"Friends! This is taking forever. Do I really have to wait that long? I mean, we're besties!"

The annoying nasal voice could only belong to Warren. His hair was purple, and there were pink and yellow spots covering his face and arms.

"You really want to go early? Get out. Door's right there," I said, pointing.

Warren hadn't killed us. But he had gone into my son's brain and ruined his safe place. His general entitlement was exhausting. I wasn't going to deal with him any longer then I had to.

"Wh-what? Okay, stop! Friends need to help each other out when they're in need!" He defended.

I walked to him, staring into his eyes. "It's your turn to 'okay stop.' You have two options here. You can walk out that door and leave my family alone. Or you can be thrown out that window right there, and we'll see if those wings grow in then," I said, my voice low.

He gulped. "Fine. I'm sure my many other best friends will help me!" He said. He tried to glare, but his voice was shaky and his eyes were full of fear.

He paused at the door. I glared at him and he finally got the message, walking out with a huff.

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

"As you were saying?" Robin asked the white haired boy before us. He was clearly our computer; there was a screen on his chest.

He cleared his throat. "My name is Colin. My pronouns are he/they. And I know my lesson wasn't great but I feel like maybe we've sort of bonded since then?"

"If you let me see that picture of a skeleton then you can definitely stay. Actually, I have another question. Why was it your lesson and not the other two?" Robin demanded.

Colorful pixels flashed across the screen as it shifted from a hazard sign to a skeleton. "There's your dark web skeleton. And I took over the lesson because my sister Laura has stage fright. That's why Gilbert was there, he was going to help her, but she decided to just let me take over," he explained.

He was fidgeting with the cuffs of his jacket, refusing to meet our eyes.

"Is he okay?" Doi asked me.

"How would I know?" I said. He shrugged.

"Hey! Are you okay? You're getting all fidgety like I do when I'm sad," he asked. Colin frowned.

"Yeah, I guess I'm okay. I just don't like being all… fleshy," he said. I pursed my lips in sympathy.

"You can go sit down," I said.

The tall girl who had pushed him forward was next. "I'm Laura, and I use she/her pronouns. I don't know you very well so there aren't a lot of reasons to let me stay or kick me out," she shrugged.

"You're the sister with stage fright?" I said skeptically.

"Only about singing," she explained.

"Right. Well, like you said, there's no reason to kick you out. Robin?"

"Next!" He yelled instead of answering.

Laura went to sit next to Colin, who was now wearing headphones. The two really did look similar. Both had colorful square freckles and light grey skin.

The next person in line stepped forward.

"My name is Gilbert. I use he/him pronouns. I also don't know you very well, but I can help around the house. I'm quite good at sweeping," the short man, who had blue skin with white splotches, offered.

"I'll hold you to that!" Robin threatened. "Next!"

"Wait, when did you get your clipboard?" I asked. On the clipboard was a list of teachers. Several were crossed out.

"While you were busy with that pesky bee. Doi counted all the teachers, so now I can check them off as we go!"

I rolled my eyes, but smiled. These two and that damn clipboard...

The next two teachers stepped forward and my face dropped.

"You…" I said, gritting my teeth.

"My name is Steve. And I'm not thrilled about it either, buster."

"You killed my dad!" Doi growled.

Robin was trembling. I couldn't tell if it was with anger or fear. I offered my hand and he squeezed it tightly.

"Just get out," Robin said. The usual bravado in his voice was gone; his expression was vacant.

"Yeah? And where do you suppose I'll go?" He was trying to be intimidating?

Two could play at that game.

"You could go six feet under. I could help with that. I'll make sure it's not boring. Maybe I'll remove your internal organs and feed them to your green child there. Oh wait, it's already been done."

Everything in me wanted to yell, to scream at this pig of a man, but I kept my voice low and even. He wasn’t going to win like that.

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

"Wow, how terrifying. The softie is gonna kill me Spinach," he cackled. It was an ugly sound.

"Frightening. I think the fancy foods clogging their bodies will get them before they can get us," the short person beside him said.

Before I knew what was happening, my fist was meeting the pig's face. I didn't stop punching until the smirk was wiped off his stupid face.

"Get OUT!" I screamed. I couldn't handle this.

All the guilt of abandoning the people I cared about most was rushing back. I tried to escape, alone, and they had hurt my family. It was all my fault.

It was my fault that Doi still struggled to eat, saying how 'greedy' he was.

It was my fault that none of us could eat canned food.

It was my fault that Robin woke up screaming and clutching his stomach at least once a week.

It was my fault that we had to change the phone ringer.

I let go of Steve's shirt. When had I grabbed it in the first place?

He was wiping the blood from his nose, which was possibly broken. Good, I thought. Damn pig.

"Alright, we're going," the human spinach can raised their hands in surrender. "Let's go dad."

They went out the front door, into whatever it was that had appeared outside it.

"Papa. Go sit with dad. I can take care of the next ones," Doi said. His eyes were both green now, like when he'd had new batteries.

I paused. I didn't want to dump this responsibility on him, but Robin clearly needed a break. Honestly, so did I. Everyone was staring at me, mildly afraid after that outburst.

I didn't like losing control. It reminded me of that day, when Doi had broken the computer. We were meaner back then, not accepting that we were stuck here, and stuck together.

"Okay. That… yeah. Okay," I said. I took Robin’s hand. He was still staring vacantly at his clipboard.

He quietly handed it to Doi, who seemed startled. He gently smiled at Robin, who refused to meet his eyes.

I guided him to the kitchen, just to get away from the piercing eyes. I sat in my chair, scooping Robin into my lap.

"Hey. Are you alright?" I whispered, tilting his chin up to look at his eyes.

"Yes. No," he said, eyes welling with tears. "It's like I can f-feel it all over again. They just stood there like it was nothing. It ruined my life, e-even more than being… being here does! It should ruin them too! IT'S NOT FAIR," he screamed, clutching my arms until it hurt.

I hugged him closer to me. "I know. None of it makes sense. But I promise that it will ruin them. I will ruin them. Because I'm never leaving you again."

He sniffed, burying his face in my shoulder. "Good. I need you… you and Doi are the only things keeping me sane."

I pressed a kiss to the top of his head, whispering quiet comfort.

"I love you," he whispered back. My heart swelled, and I had to force back tears.

I could protect them. Even from changes as big as this.

Chapter Text

Doi's P.O.V

I smiled at the clipboard in my hands. Usually Dad never let me touch it.

A frown replaced the smile. He only had because he was upset.

I was glad Papa had gotten rid of the last teachers. They were the ones who made Dad upset. They made me upset too. I ran my tongue over my teeth, just to make sure they were okay.

It was like I could still hear their horrible song.

Most of the new people were potential friends. But not them. Especially that can. They were a person now, but that didn't make it better. They were still a can before. I didn't like cans.

Papa and Dad still used them to make dinner, but they didn't make me help, so I didn't have to see them. They were nicer than my other dad.

He was mean. He liked to make me climb trees. Trees scared me. So did heights.

I shook my head, remembering what I was supposed to be doing. My mind felt a little bit clearer. It wasn't quite like when I had batteries.

It was like having one good battery. I could think easier all the time, but even now that I was doing something important and felt smarter my brain was distracted.

"Next!" I said. The tall boy who walked up seemed afraid. I tilted my head to the side, then realized.

"Oh! You're the fridge," I said.

He nodded, his body pressed against the wall. "I can go if you want. No, uh, no need to punch me."

"No. You weren't as mean as them. I think you can earn a room," I said.

Wait, a room? There was only one bedroom. The one I shared with my dads.

But somehow, I knew that wasn't true anymore.

"How?"

"Hmm. Well, can you cook? There are a lot more people to cook for now, I don't want Papa to get tired," I suggested. He was a fridge after all, he must know something about food.

"Yeah, I could cook. I can do whatever you want," he said. He slowly stepped away from the wall.

"Splendid!" I said, the word feeling unusual. Did I use it wrong? Why did I use a big word at all?

"What was your name?" I said, deciding to move on.

"Frank. Uh, he/it pronouns," he said, running a hand through its neat hair.

I nodded, checking him off the list.

Chapter Text

Doi's P.O.V

"Next!" I was getting the hang of this! I smiled, a feeling of pride filling my chest.

A tall person with blue skin stepped forward. I glared. I knew who this was...

"You're that lamp! The one who made me drown!" I accused.

"Oh right, you're that kid!" He said. He frowned. "Sorry about that. You have some crazy nightmares dude."

"They're your fault! You're the one who taught me about dreams anyway. I never wanted to know!" I yelled, balling up my fists.

"No man, you've got it twisted. I can only see dreams, I can't control them. Wouldn't that be wild though?" He spoke with drawn out words.

"I don't like you," I said, crossing my arms. I glared at him, trying to get my point across.

"I can't blame you."

"Larry, you're supposed to be trying to convince him to let you stay, not to kick you out faster," the globe-one said. What was his name? Gilbert.

"Oh, right. Uh, I could like. Help the insomniacs sleep. The tall red one has trouble with that, right?" He offered with a shrug.

I squinted. He did have a point. I had woken up to get water or after a nightmare lots of times and Papa would be wandering the kitchen, wide awake.

"How does that work?"

"I've got this sand. It's like, dream sand. It'll knock you out like that," he snapped. "I'll show you. Hey Colin, wanna be unconscious?"

"If this is reality I'm afraid of what the dream would be," the computer-one shuddered.

Larry rolled his eyes. "Whatever, be lame. I'm also good at like. Folding bedding. You know those annoying-ass fitted sheets? I'm an expert," he bragged.

"Hmmm…. Fine. If you wash the bedding and help Papa sleep you can stay. But no more oil!" I ordered.

"Got it," he saluted, walking to Gilbert. He swayed while he walked, almost like my mean-dad did when he drank too much sour juice.

I shook my head to get the thought out. He was scary when he had sour juice. I remembered things better now. I didn't want to remember that at all, let alone more clearly.

I stared at the clipboard. There were a lot of names left. I hoped my dads would feel better soon. This was giving me big emotions, and not the nice ones, like excited.

"Next," I said. A man in a brown suit walked to me. His hair was messy and he had papers sticking out of his pockets.

"I'm Terry, my pronouns are he/him," he said.

"You're the one who had one of himself," I accused. "The business bag."

"I am."

"You took my wife away," I said, my voice shaking. The lesson on jobs had theoreti-technically only lasted twenty minutes. But to me it was forty years. A whole separate life that was stolen from me.

I still painted pictures of Claire and Janet. Just to have something to prove they were real. To make sure my dumb brain didn't make me forget.

"What do you mean? You can't be over ten," the man furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"In the workplace. We were there for- for a long time. I was ready to re- retire, that's the word. I had a daughter. And you took it all away from me!" Tears were streaming down my face.

"She was about to graduate from kindergarten. I was s-so proud of her," I sobbed, dropping the clipboard. "Was it even real?"

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

"Love. Love, we need to go check on Doi. He's crying," I whispered, nudging Robin's shoulder.

He unburied his face from my chest. He wasn't crying anymore, which was a good sign.

"Let's go then," he said, standing and offering a hand to help me up. I took it, and didn't let go once we got to the sitting room. It was still odd that he didn't have feathers on his hands anymore.

Doi was sitting on the floor, face buried in his knees.

"Oh, come here. It's okay bud, let it out," I said, picking him up. He was trembling.

"What did you do?" Robin said, storming towards the disheveled looking man in front of Doi.

"I didn't do anything! He asked if I was the business bag, and then started talking about a wife and child," the man raised his hands as if he were surrendering.

My eyes widened, and I held Doi tighter, gently rubbing his back. He had sat with me and cried many times about the life he had lost in that workplace.

I also worked at Peterson's for forty years, but I never missed my time there. The only thing I had grown an attachment to was my lanyard.

Doi had a family. He had a wife, and a lovely daughter. I remembered meeting her on the bring your child to work day. I told Doi that story often. I told him any memories of his family that he wasn't there for, anything to give him more time with them.

"So you are the briefcase?" I asked, just to confirm. The man nodded, looking more anxious by the second.

"Explain. How did you warp the time in your lesson? Why did you do it?" I demanded.

"I don't even know myself! I just walked away to go to my job as a school counselor! I nearly got fired after disappearing because I got dragged back to this world, and when I did get back, all that time had passed.

"I panicked and started singing again because that's what I was hired to do and, well, you know what happened," the man said, slowly inching away from Robin, who was growling at him.

"Wait, you were hired? By who?" I demanded. A few locs fell across my face, but I didn't bother to move them.

He opened his mouth to say something, but it only came out as static. He jumped as if he was also scared by this. "I can't say her name," he said.

"Actually, I don't feel that gre-" he collapsed onto the floor.

Chapter Text

Lesly's P.O.V

I gazed over the dollhouse, and its new expansions.

"This should keep you busy. After all, there's no need for you three to keep finding things you needn't worry about, is there?

"As for the new ones, well, there's plenty that the real world needn't worry about either."

An alarm went off, and I sighed.

"Oh dear Terry, we can't have you saying that. Perhaps a nap would help." I nudged the newly human figure over, and the alarm silenced.

"I do suppose I should wipe everyone's memories, but it will have to wait until you're asleep. Quite the situation you've landed us in."

Harry was yelling now. I sighed; his mind was always the hardest to wipe…

"Quite the situation indeed. I do hope that this is the right decision. I would hate to kill you all again. The students were quite upset when that happened during the blackout."

I gazed over the scene again, absent-mindedly playing a soft melody on my piano.

"But maybe…"

I placed a new dollhouse across the street. A bold sign reading "Tesco," was on the side.

"Maybe this is exactly the change of pace they need."

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

The next person in line ran to the briefcase, leaning down to check his pulse. "He's alive. Just passed out," he sighed. He grabbed the man's hand, sitting on the ground next to him.

I grit my teeth, not even caring who this new person was. "Dammit! Every time we get close to answers!" I yelled. I had the urge to throw something, but Doi was in my arms, and I couldn't hurt him.

"Please don't y-yell," he whispered. I kissed the top of his head, something that was much easier now that I had lips.

"Sorry kiddo. I'm not mad at you, don't worry. I'm just frustrated," I explained. He nodded, cuddling closer to me.

"Are you going to let him stay?" He asked.

"Do you think we should? You're the one who he hurt the most."

"Hm… it seems like it was an accident. I do those a lot and you still let me stay. So I guess he can stay too," Doi rationalized.

"Okay then. That's very kind of you," I said. He gave a small smile.

"Who are you?" Robin demanded. The man next to the briefcase was still checking that he wasn't injured. He glanced at Robin, frowning.

That's when I noticed his eyes. His left eye was surrounded by scars, and the eye itself was black with gold marbling. Probably glass, I thought to myself.

"I'm Mortimer. The Coffin," He said. He sounded annoyed, but his expression was more afraid than anything.

"Oh. Right. Well, you can absolutely stay. Honestly, we owe you the apology," I said. He nodded.

"You certainly do. Well, not you," he gestured to me, "but the other two."

Robin shifted uncomfortably under the man's piercing gaze. "Right. Uh, sorry for, well, you know. Everything," he shrugged.

"I acknowledge your apology," Mortimer said, lips pursed.

"Oh! I remember you. You took Dad away," Doi said. "And then I got him back. I'm sorry, I didn't really think about how that would hurt you. We're so used to dying that I forgot it was permanent for some people."

Mortimer raised an eyebrow. His face read as skeptical, but his body was slightly trembling. I couldn't blame him, considering he was being faced with two people who had caused him quite a bit of bodily harm.

"Right. I guess I can accept that," He finally decided.

The briefcase began to stir, sitting up.

"Oh thank goodness! What was that Terry? You scared me," Mortimer scolded.

"I-I don't know. I just got dizzy and then I woke up like this," the briefcase, Terry, shrugged.

"Do you feel alright now?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Good."

"Right. You can go to the kitchen and get some water or something if you need. I don't really know what helps with passing out," I offered.

"Right. Thank you…"

"Harry."

"Thank you Harry," Mortimer nodded to me, guiding Terry out of the room.

I rubbed my forehead, this was giving me a headache. Too much was happening.

"Hey bud, I might need to set you down," I whispered to Doi.

"Okaaaayyy," he whined. I set him down, and he ran to Robin. "Here's your clipboard. Thank you for letting me touch it!"

"You're welcome. It's truly a privilege," Robin smirked. "Now let's get this over with, who's next?"

There was a wheezing cough as a very elderly man hobbled forward with a cane.

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

The pink-skinned man grunted, leaning heavily on his cane. "You know me. Theodore, or Gramps, the transport man," he said.

"I thought you died. Didn't he die?" I asked Robin. He had died early in his lesson, leaving us… what had we done after that? All I could remember was TV static.

We must have just been bored at home. Nothing else would have made sense.

"Apparently he didn't. Or, at least, he's not anymore. I think he can stay. He didn't really do much to make us like or hate him," Robin said, making a mark on his clipboard.

"Yeah, you're right. You should probably go sit down," I said to Gramps.

"Huh? You're gonna have to stop mumbling sonny," he coughed.

"You can go sit!" I said, drawing out the words.

"No need to be rude," the man huffed, finding an empty chair and sitting with a groan. I rolled my eyes.

"Alright, who's next?" I asked.

"Oh! It's the last one," Robin said. He made more marks on his clipboard.

A person with teal skin and thick, wire-hair bounced forward. "I'm Tracy. My pronouns are they/them."

"You were the electricity box?" Robin asked. They nodded.

I thought back to their lesson. Like the Train's, the details were a bit fuzzy, but I remembered a blackout… something about an electric chair…

"You killed our pet animal," Doi said.

"Things were a little bit different then," Tracy defended. Doi glared.

"I don't know, they were pretty normal, weren't they? Pretty minimal torture," I said. They were nicer than most of the others sitting in the room with us right now.

"There was the whole thing… with the… you know," Robin whispered.

"You mean the batteries?" Doi asked. Robin yelped and I jumped back.

"So you uh. You remember," I said. Doi nodded.

"Just a little bit. I remember the other me. And Dad took the batteries away… and something else important happened… I can't remember that one though."

I squinted, trying to think back. Robin took the batteries back to fix the house. He had his shredder. Something with the shredder. What happened with the shredder?

Robin grabbed my hand. "You're stabbing yourself. You should stop doing that," he said.

Sure enough there were small marks from my nails left behind on my hands.

"I just… can't remember. Can you?" I asked. Robin shook his head.

"Not anything significant. Maybe we should keep them around in case they know things," he suggested.

"Maybe. Doi, what do you think?"

"They look friendly. Sure," he decided. Tracy shifted awkwardly.

"Uh, thanks." They walked to Colin and Laura, leaning on the back of the chair.

I glanced over the stuffed living room. There were barely enough seats. Unfortunately, now it was time to worry about where they would all go.

"I'm getting my coffee, and then we need to decide where to look first. The new front door, or up the new second floor," I announced.

"They're not new. Just different," Doi said.

"Right. Just different. Very, very different," I muttered.

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

We ate quickly, making awkward small talk with Terry and Mortimer. The entire time my eyes were drawn to the doorway leading to the sitting room.

"Done! Let's go explore," Robin announced.

"Wait. Are we going to trust them alone down here?" I asked. I had already been anxious about being in the room next door.

The room was buzzing with several quiet conversations. The teachers had already broken into clusters. Had they all met before? Clearly some of them had.

Robin squinted. "You're right. Hey, computery-one! You've helped us before. Make sure they don't… I don't know, make sure they don't destroy everything," he ordered.

"It's Colin. And I'll try, I guess?" He shrugged.

"Perfect! Now let's go," Robin turned back to me.

I pursed my lips. I still wasn't sure how I felt about leaving them behind, but putting one of the more trustworthy ones in charge did help.

"Alright," I finally decided.

When we got upstairs, we were faced with even more change. Where a short hallway that led to our one room would normally be, there was a long hallway lined with rooms.

Each door was labeled. The one closest to us said "Harry and Robin," and the one next to that said "Doi."

I sighed. "At least we know where to put everyone. Shall we?"

I opened the door to Robin and I's new room. How it had transformed so drastically since we woke up was a mystery to me. Just like everything else.

It looked similar to our old room. There was only one bed, but it was much larger than our original beds. There was a dresser with a mirror above it, and a wardrobe in the corner. The posters and other decorations we had used over our beds were reconfigured to fill more space.

"This is… your room?" Doi asked, his voice wobbling. "I has- have to be alone?"

"Even if that was the case, you could still stay in here if that made you more comfortable. But that door over there," I pointed to a door on the wall opposite the dresser, "probably leads to your room, so we'll still be close."

"Really?" He asked hopefully.

"Let's check," Robin squawked, opening the door. On the other side was a room with pale green walls and a small bed. There was a hanging organizer and wardrobe, along with several of Doi's drawings.

"See! Nothing to worry about," I said. "If you want to keep the door open it'll be just like sharing a room again."

Doi beamed, flapping his hands. "That makes me happy!" He cheered. I grinned back, ruffling his hair.

Robin was busy observing some of the drawings. "These are quite good," he said. Somehow Doi's smile grew, and he tackled Robin in a hug.

"Thank you dad!" Doi yelled. Robin let out a small 'oof,' but quickly hugged him back.

"You're quite welcome. Now, let's continue! I want to learn all about these new rooms and people. That way I can make them respect me!" Robin said.

Chapter Text

Hi!

I made a companion fic for this AU! If you want to see scrapped scenes, incorrect quotes, loose ideas, sneak peeks, and other content related to this AU, this is where to find it!

The fic is called Headcanon Central (Dhmis Humanoid! AU)

You can also suggest any ideas and ask any questions on this fic or the new one.

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

We walked out of Doi's room. Across the hallway was Tony's room, and Colin’s room was next to his. Robin went to open Tony's door, but I grabbed his hand.

"Maybe we shouldn't go in their room without asking," I suggested. Robin sighed.

"Don't be boring. Why not?" He asked.

"It's rude. We don't know if they still have powers, we need to be careful about upsetting them," I reasoned. I started fidgeting with my hair. We really knew nothing about these people. Thinking too hard about it made me feel sick.

"Harry, you punched one of them in the face."

Shit. Hopefully that didn't blow up in my face.

"I- uh- Touché. But I still don't feel like poking through the things of a dozen people we barely know. It sounds time consuming and what are we really going to get out of it?"

"Fine," Robin groaned. "But I still think you're being boring."

"Only boring people think things are boring," I muttered.

"Oh shut up!" Robin squawked. I smirked, grabbing his hand. He huffed, but didn't let go.

"You're so mean to me," he muttered. I rolled my eyes and kissed the top of his head. Our height difference was less drastic now, but Robin was still quite short.

Doi, who had run down the hallway while we were distracted, ran back towards us. "There are ten… eleven… twelve rooms! I counted them!" He announced with a grin.

"Excellent job! Now, let's see who they belong to!" Robin suggested.

On the left side, in order from the staircase to the end of the hall, was Robin and I's room, Doi's room, Terry and Mortimer's room, Paige’s room, Tracy's room, and a bathroom.

On the right was Tony's room, Colin's room, Laura’s room, Frank's room, Gilbert's room, and Larry’s room.

"The train, what was his name?" I squinted, trying to remember. I had just learned far too many names. So many new people…

"Whatever it was, he doesn't have a room," I noted. Neither did any of the people we had kicked out.

"Strange. Maybe it has something to do with the new front door," Robin suggested. I nodded. I hoped so, I didn't want to figure out how an old man was supposed to sleep in the living room

"Are we going to look- look out there now?" Doi asked.

"I suppose so. What do you think, Robin?"

"Yes! Let's keep exploring!" Robin said. I frowned; he seemed unbothered by all these changes. Was I overreacting?

"Harry, you're zoning out. Again. What's wrong?" Robin asked. I lightly shook my head to snap myself out of it.

"Hm? Oh, nothing. You just seem so okay with this, so I was wondering why I'm… not," I explained, not meeting his eyes.

"Why do you think I'm in such a hurry to keep exploring? I don't want to start worrying about… everything," he shuddered.

"Oh! It's a distraction! That makes more sense."

He nodded, grabbing and squeezing my hand.

"Are you almost ready?" Doi asked. He was already halfway down the stairs. I chuckled, patience had never been any of our strong suits.

"We're coming, don't worry," I reassured him.

Chapter Text

Robin’s P.O.V

We followed Doi down the stairs. I glanced around, and the sitting room hadn't dissolved into chaos. I smiled; I had made a good choice appointing the computer to keep them in check.

"Attention freaks! We will be going outside now. The computery-one will still be in charge!" I announced. Harry scoffed, and I elbowed him lightly in the ribs.

I could reach his ribs now! I was quite liking this extra height.

However, I was not enjoying the strange chills I was experiencing. The lack of feathers on my face and hands made me feel unprotected.

Not to mention how different it felt talking through a mouth and not a beak. It almost felt like my mouth was being moved by someone else, causing certain words to be pronounced oddly.

~Focus!~ I shook myself out of my thoughts.

This is why we had to keep moving. I didn't want to spiral about how bizarre everything was. Or what these people had done…

"Onward!" I yelled, grabbing Harry's hand and dragging him behind me. Doi skipped after us.

I threw open the front door before Harry could warn me about 'caution.'

We were met with… more buildings? Now that I thought about it, had we ever seen the outside of the house?

It was pink, which was definitely not my taste. Maybe Doi picked it, he was always using bright colors in his drawings. But why would he have chosen the paint color?

I squeezed my eyes shut. Too much logic! It was confusing my brain, and I didn't want to think about it any longer. Thinking was for nerds like Harry anyway.

Something that was definitely new was a smaller house attached to the pink one we had just walked out of. The smaller house was navy blue with a white roof.

"Is that… a shop? Have we ever been to a shop?" Harry asked. His eyes were widened, sparkling in the sunlight. I followed his gaze to the white building across the street.

"I don't rememberd if we did," Doi said. He tilted his head, staring at the building.

It was big, with a huge window next to the glass doors. The word "Tesco" was written in bold red letters on the side. Next to it was a big, empty patch of grass with a fence surrounding it.

"Well, should we go inside then? I wonder what's in there," I said, already starting to walk across the street.

Harry followed quickly behind, still holding my hand. Doi ran ahead of us, giggling the whole way.

Once we got closer to the door I noticed a yellow circle reading "out." I decided to ignore the circle, marching through the door when it magically opened.

I dared not to wonder why. I didn't want to find another teacher, human or otherwise. Luckily, none appeared.

I stepped inside, trying to take everything in. The floor was white and shiny, almost like our kitchen floor, and yet completely different. The lights were almost obnoxiously bright.

Most spectacular were the shelves. There were aisles of big metal shelves full of everything.

"Wow," I whispered.

"Have you ever seen so many of the same things? There's never this much of anything in the house," Harry said, brushing his hair out of his eyes.

"It's so colorful! It's so big! It's so shiny!" Doi cheered, flapping his hands.

On the left was a row of small counters, with a smaller metal box on top. There was a person behind it. A teacher?

She didn't look like any of them though. She just looked tired. "Are you going to get out of the doorway and buy something?" She sighed, rolling her eyes.

I huffed through my nose, an odd sensation. How rude! "She's acting like she doesn't respect me!"

"Love, she looks too tired to care. Let's leave her alone," Harry suggested.

"No fun," I muttered, but I decided not to push the issue further.

Chapter Text

Robin’s P.O.V

We started to wander through the store. The shelves had food we had never even seen before.

Doi grabbed a box of cereal off the shelf. He quietly sounded out the words. "S..o..u..r p..a…t..ch kids," he said.

"I thought those were candy," I said, looking closer at the box. It was yellow with obnoxious green around the edges.

"They are. That's just a cereal version. It's called a…" Harry frowned at the ground. "A gimmick," he finally remembered.

"They make strange items so people buy them just because they're strange," he explained.

I grinned. "That sounds manipulative! I love it, it's even better than foraging documents!"

Harry rolled his eyes.

"Can we get the gim-gimmick?" Doi asked, giving his best puppy dog eyes. Harry's face instantly melted into a soft smile.

"I don't see why not," He said, ruffling his hair.

"Soft," I said, playing it off as a cough.

Harry ignored me, continuing down the aisle. There were hundreds of boxes of cereal. Loops, flakes, marshmallows, squares, wheat.

And that was just one aisle!

"How long do you think this place will be here?" I asked Harry. Doi was busy picking up and studying the most colorfully packaged items.

"I have no idea. Hopefully a long time. Maybe this means we can shop instead of food magically appearing. We have choices Robin! Choices!" Harry laughed, a look of pure joy on his face.

"We… we can leave! There's more than three rooms! More than one building! We came here all on our own, and we've been here for how long? An hour? And nothing is going wrong!" He pulled me into a hug and spun around.

"You're right. It's almost too good to be true!" I said. I was slightly suspicious, but I squashed those feelings down. If we got to be free, even for an hour, I wasn't going to ruin it with second guessing.

Doi scrambled over to us, arms overflowing with cereal. "Hey papa! Can we get these? Pretty please?" He asked. I was sure he had his puppy dog eyes, but I could barely see them behind all the boxes.

"Nice try bud. Pick thr- four," I said. Someone needed to be the voice of reason.

"Awwwwww," Harry and Doi whined in unison.

"Harry, you don't even like cereal!" I accused. He blushed, averting his eyes.

"That's besides the point," he said. I chuckled, standing on the tips of my toes to give him a kiss on the cheek. He smirked, easily kissing the top of my head.

I narrowed my eyes. "Put your tall privilege away!" I demanded.

"If I leaned down to talk to you, you would bite me," he pointed out.

"That's besides the point," I said in a mocking tone. We stared at each other for a minute before dissolving into laughter.

"I have five, is that okay?" Doi asked. I sighed. He stared at me, slightly pouting.

"Five is fine," I relented, earning a fist pump from Doi. I couldn't help but smile. I loved my family.

Chapter Text

Robin’s P.O.V

After $400 of cereal, cookies, frozen pizza in different forms, and bananas after my insistence on a fruit, we exited the store.

The store didn't immediately disappear when we left. We were back outside, not in the house. That was a good sign.

Harry looked happier than I had ever seen him. ~That’s not right. That's the happiest you've seen him here.~

There was a flash of a memory. Harry was human, like he was now. And he was crying with joy. But it was gone before I could get any meaning from it.

I shook it off, watching Doi instead. He had insisted on carrying most of the bags, slowing him down. Harry had matched his pace, and I remained the group leader.

"One of us probably needs a job. Do you think we can get a job now? Not like the lesson, a real one," Harry said.

My eyes widened and I gasped. "I can make my digital currency! I'll start as soon as we're done here!" It was perfect! Another distraction to pour my focus into, instead of pointless worrying and questioning why our strange time-loop world worked the way it did.

"That's not the worst idea," Harry said. "Hey, look. We're almost to the other building. What do you think 'McDonald's' means?"

"It's a re-restaurant," Doi said slowly. I still wasn't used to him making smart statements. It brought back memories from when he was smart…

~And it brings up guilt.~ I did what I had to! We needed to fix the house somehow!

I walked to the door with a new intensity. I threw it open, letting Doi and Harry walk in first.

Inside there were a few tables. There was a large counter in front of a very shiny grey kitchen, and the same small box that had been at the Tesco. We had learned that the box held money.

I was quite disappointed when Harry told me we had to give the box money, not the other way around. It looked full enough to me, surely it could share!

"Welcome to McDonald's," a person behind the counter said. They were much more cheerful than the Tesco person.

"Um, hello," Harry waved awkwardly. He wasn’t nearly as skilled at demanding respect as I was.

Doi was staring at the board above the counter. It was a… menu!

"Are we gonna order food?" Doi whispered.

"I reckon we should. We're here, after all," Harry pointed out.

I nodded. "Yes! That sounds like an excellent idea."

We ordered chicken nuggets, and brought the boxes to a table for a chicken picnic. This time without any pesky bees.

Harry opened his box. Inside were brown, lumpy shapes. "That doesn't look like any chicken I've seen. It's not even pink, or red!"

"Yeah! Is this a- a scam?" Doi agreed, crossing his arms.

Harry picked one of the shapes up, studying it closely. "No, this is chicken. It's just been cooked. God, I haven't seen cooked chicken since… well, before the 19th."