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The warm, uncomfortable breeze hits him face first as he walks out of his building, attempting to make it to his first class of the day. He’s running late - as usual - so he quickens his steps, almost sprinting.
Fuck, he’s already out of breath. Rick doesn’t know why he decided to enroll himself in a class located all the way on the other side of campus. Not even a full week in and he already wants to drop out, not to mention the handful of frat guys from last year that are still on his ass for whatever reason. He’s not even halfway done with college and he desperately wants it to be over; wants to move out of his shitty dorm, find an actual full-time job doing what he loves. He can only dream.
Quite literally dream. He’s suddenly pulled out of his daydreaming by a hard shove to his shoulder, almost knocking him to the ground completely. He stumbles, drops his coffee then his book which of course happens to land in the puddle of coffee; said puddle growing by the second, flooding his book.
“Shit!” He yelps, bending down and grabbing his book as quickly as he can. He pays no attention to where the sudden shove came from, simply focusing on saving his book while he still can. If he still can.
“The hell are you reading anyway?” A voice comes from his side, harsh and demanding. Before Rick knows it, his book is snatched from his hands. He stares up at the guy - blonde, tall - and recognizes him immediately as one of the frat boys who bullied him throughout last year.
He quickly skim reads the back of the book, laughing. “A fucking gay book? What, dreaming about your fantasies because no guy wants you? Huh?” He pries, voice dripping with malice. The few other guys standing around him begin to chime in, laughing.
Rick’s heart just now begins to beat out of his chest, suddenly hammering hard beneath his ribs. No one knows he’s gay except for a few of his closest friends. Now, a bunch of idiotic frat guys know, which really shouldn’t be a big problem - they’re not in the stone ages - but these guys don’t like that apparently.
“Can you just give it back? I have class.” His voice is soft but he manages an eye roll, hopefully showing them he’s done with their bullshit.
They all laugh again, the tall blonde throwing Rick’s book right at his face, connecting with his nose. Of course, the one hardcover book he has is the one that gets thrown at his face.
He stumbles back, wincing in pain and reaching up to gently cradle his nose. He has no clue what the fuck to do. He can’t just fight these guys off; he probably can’t even fight off a single one. He might have a decent amount of muscle but he’s a bit short, so that immediately puts him at a disadvantage. The moment he looks up at them, realizing his hands are covered in blood, he knows he’s fucked.
“Hey! Dipshits!” A voice booms loudly from behind Rick, making him flinch with fear. He’s honestly afraid to turn around, afraid to face the person who holds a voice so recognizable to him. He doesn’t even get the chance to actually turn around, though, as the man comes around his side, stepping in front of him. “The hell are you stupid fucks doing?” He asks genuinely, softer than before.
Surprisingly, all of their faces go slack with shock, maybe a touch of fear, too. Silence fills the air, making Rick uncomfortable.
“I’m waiting for a goddamn answer!” He snaps, stepping closer and getting in the blondes face, easily towering over him. Said blonde backs away, mouth opening and closing as he searches for something to say.
“N-nothing…” The blonde - Gareth, Rick remembers - stammers softly, face pale.
Rick watches in awe as Negan mumbles something under his breath, too soft for Rick to hear. The group of guys immediately disperse once Negan goes quiet, practically running away. Meanwhile, Rick is still standing there, beyond confused, blood dripping from his hands and nose. He sees Negan’s shoulders rise and fall slowly - taking a deep breath.
Negan spins around, face to face with Rick again. “You alright?” He asks gently, possibly in the softest tone Rick has ever heard him speak in.
Rick is at a loss for words. Why the hell did Negan do all that if he practically does the same shit to him almost everyday? Well, maybe not the book to the face thing, but the teasing, yes.
“What-I…” He falters for words. Does he thank him? Tell him to fuck off? He’s starting to wish Negan never showed up; he’d much rather have taken the beating those guys were about to give him. “You tell them to fuck off just so you could tease me yourself? That it?” He snaps, somewhat surprising himself.
Negan’s whole face scrunches up in confusion, taken off guard. “What?” He asks bewildered, dropping his voice a bit. “I fucking told them to fuck off because they were about to beat you the fuck up, that’s why.” He raised his voice, unable to contain his anger and confusion towards Rick.
Rick rolls his eyes, not responding. He picks up his book again, shaking off the coffee dripping from the pages. He spent twenty dollars on this fucking book and now it’s absolutely ruined.
Negan stood idle, watching. The look on Rick’s face once he saw how destroyed his book was broke Negan’s goddamn heart. He might pick on Rick often, probably too often, but he doesn’t mean any harm. He just likes to rile people up for no reason; call it his hobby, if you will. Doesn’t mean he dislikes Rick - god, why would anyone dislike him? He’s the definition of fucking beautiful, soft and caring towards every person he meets. What’s not to like?
Maybe he just should’ve been nicer to Rick. Negan knows his teasing and smart ass comments can sometimes get to people - make them upset - but he assumed Rick didn’t care. At least that’s what it seemed like by the looks of it. After all, Rick is absolutely gorgeous; there’s no way in hell Negan would ever get a chance with him if he’s just an idiotic asshole who doesn’t know how to keep his mouth shut.
“You should probably do something about your nose.” He comments softly, gesturing to his own face. “You’re bleeding pretty bad.” He adds, consciously making an effort to keep his voice calm and soft, the complete opposite of how he normally speaks.
“Yeah.” Rick replies blandly, no hint of emotion behind his voice. He tries to keep his fingers pinched on each side of his nose, applying firm pressure but regardless, the flow of blood doesn’t let up.
“C’mon, I’ll take you to my apartment. Clean you up.” He offers, nodding his head in the direction of his home.
“You have an apartment?” Rick asks, eyes wide and brows raised. He doesn’t even register Negan’s offer to help him, he’s more focused on how the hell Negan has an apartment as a college student.
“Yeah.” He nods, beginning to walk off, hoping Rick will follow. Only a short moment passes and Rick is by Negan’s side, keeping up with him with interest.
“How do you even afford that? Daddy’s money or somethin’?” He asks stubbornly, still not entirely convinced that Negan genuinely wants to help him. But, he’s quite literally following Negan to his apartment, so if this ends up being a trap of sorts, he asked for it.
“Oh, fuck off.” Negan chides, softly bumping his shoulder into Rick’s. “Well, half daddy’s money, half my own. So, you’re right I suppose.” He concedes, sighing heavily just to be dramatic.
Rick only huffs heavily, rolling his eyes. He has so many questions to ask, so fucking confused why Negan is helping him. He can’t find it in himself to ask anything, though, continuous waves of embarrassment flowing over him as he walks throughout campus with an extremely obvious bloody nose.
They walk in silence for a bit, maybe a few minutes until Negan notices the immense amount of blood pouring from Rick’s nose. “Shit.” He says, urgency and concern filling his voice. He begins to dig through each of his pockets, trying to find something Rick can use to slow down his blood loss. His hand digs into something soft. He pulls it out, retrieving a red scarf. He forgot he still carried it with him. “Here.” He holds out the scarf, waiting for Rick to take it.
Rick stops in his tracks, staring down at Negan’s hand. He’s holding out a red scarf. Rick contemplates on taking it but with the way his nose is bleeding, he’s surprised he’s not dizzy from the amount of blood he’s lost.
“Rick, just fucking take it.” He sighs, waving around the scarf, beckoning Rick to accept it. When he doesn’t, Negan doesn’t hesitate to do it himself. He folds the scarf a few times, making sure it’s thick enough to soak up blood, then steps closer to Rick, removing his bloody hands from his nose. He quickly pinches Rick’s nose, the cloth between their skin. He settles his other hand at the back of Rick’s neck, pulling him closer so he can get a better grip on Rick’s nose.
It takes every single atom of energy inside of Rick to stop himself from making a desperate little noise in the back of his throat. He hasn’t been touched like this in years, and the jolt of want it sends up his spine is familiar to say the least. He wants to be touched, sometimes even feels like he needs to be. But this sudden touch from Negan doesn’t mean anything, there’s no way it could.
“Thank you.” Rick says softly, moving to replace Negan’s hand with his own. Negan backs away at that, removing his hands; removing his soft touch.
“Course, darlin’.” He smiles softly, offering a quick nod. He quickly begins to walk again, feeling a bit unsure about keeping eye contact with Rick for so long.
Rick’s body takes a moment to actually start moving again. He got so thrown off by what Negan said; what he called him. Darlin’. Fuck, he needs to get out of his head. He’s heard Negan call countless of people ‘darlin’’, it doesn’t mean anything significant, just a simple name he uses often. On the other hand, Rick isn’t exactly sure why he’s internally freaking out over this. Negan has been picking on him for almost a year now, which in turn caused Rick to dislike him. Why does he care so much about being called a stupid pet name from a guy he’s never even liked, let alone been friends with?
Nonetheless, Rick quickly catches up with Negan, once again trailing beside him.
In a few short minutes they arrive at Negan’s apartment. It’s nothing fancy - not that Rick expected it to be - but it’s better than the dorms.
They enter through the front entrance, hit with a wave of cool air. Rick hadn’t realized how much he was sweating until the sweat on his skin began to quickly cool off, sending a chill up his spine.
Negan leads the way, stopping at the third or fourth door; Rick wasn’t sure in all honesty. He unlocks it, holding the door open for Rick. When they’re inside, Negan is quick to run off somewhere - down a short hall - returning not even a minute later with a first aid kit. He pulls out a few packages of gauze.
“C’mere.” He mumbles, walking over to the small couch and sitting down. He unwraps the gauze, waiting for Rick.
Rick once again hesitates, eyeing Negan’s hands to see what he’s unwrapping; it’s gauze. Something softens inside him as he watches Negan, who’s looking at him with worried eyes. He knows there’s most likely no reason to be so hesitant now, considering Negan gave him his own damn scarf to try and stop the bleeding, even going as far as applying it himself, walking Rick all the way back to his apartment just to help him clean up a bloody nose. He doesn’t need to keep his guard up, at least he thinks he doesn’t.
Rick sets his backpack and book on the dining room table before walking over to Negan, sitting down next to him but making sure to keep some distance between them. Negan closes that gap between them, bumping his thigh into Rick’s as he gets closer. Fuck, this is not helping at all, Rick thinks. He needs to get away from Negan before he does something he’ll regret.
“I’m not gonna hurt you, you know. I’m not like those bastards. I just like to tease people and piss ‘em off for fun; it’s harmless in my opinion but not everyone thinks that.” He shrugs, rolling his eyes. He pulls out the gauze from the package, reaching up to replace the soaked bandana. Rick visibly flinches at the contact.
“I know. Just kinda thought you didn’t like me or somethin’.” He says softly, feeling somewhat embarrassed still, if not even more by his confession.
“Nah, takes a lot for me to really not like someone.” He says easily, tightening his grip on Rick’s nose in another attempt to stop the bleeding. He notices Rick’s hands, just hovering in front of him instead of resting on his thighs. They’re still covered in blood, of course but he can’t just leave him like that. “Let’s go get your hands cleaned up, yeah?” He stands, fingers still firmly gripping Rick’s nose.
Rick simply follows Negan’s lead, keeping quiet. When they start to walk, though, Negan’s still holding his nose. He’s walking beside Rick awkwardly, kind of shuffling sideways as they walk to the bathroom. They look absolutely ridiculous but this seems to be the easiest way to do it without being extremely close to one another.
When they finally get to the bathroom - albeit slowly - Rick washes his hands, scrubbing away all the dried and fresh blood. Negan still stands beside him, idling as he waits. The few times Rick has glanced up, looking at the mirror, he sees Negan staring at him. Whether it be the side of his face or his eyes, or even his lips and neck. His expression isn’t exactly easy to read, though. He doesn’t look disgusted at all, which surprises Rick to some extent. Instead, he seems intrigued in a way. Rick has no clue how this makes him feel; shy, embarrassed, flustered? Probably all of the above.
Once Rick is finished he quickly dries his hands off, reaching up and replacing Negan’s hand with his own. He couldn’t bear the other man’s touch for much longer, it physically pained him in a way; a way that confused him beyond belief.
They returned to the living room shortly after, sitting side by side again but farther apart. Rick has his head tilted back, resting against the couch. Hopefully this’ll get the blood to stop flowing permanently now.
Negan somewhat mimics Rick’s position, resting back against the couch. His head is tilted to the side, staring at Rick - again. Something about him is so alluring but Negan can’t put his finger on what it is. Maybe it’s his icy blue eyes, his dark curls, his pink and plump lips. Fuck, everything is alluring about him.
“I completely forgot I had class.” Rick says suddenly but soft. This would only be his first absence in any of his classes but that doesn’t stop him from feeling guilty, even though he almost got beat up and still currently has a bloody nose.
Negan is quiet, uncomfortably so. Rick had expected a response like, ‘fuck class’ or ‘you literally have a bloody nose and that’s what you’re worried about?’ but he hadn’t expected the piercing silence. Nonetheless, Rick goes silent again, too. He starts thinking about his book and if it’s still salvageable; probably not.
“I’m sorry about all the teasing and shit. I hadn’t really realized you took it the wrong way and thought I hated you because of it.” He explains monotonously. He watches Rick, trying to gauge his reaction. There’s not much to gauge, though. Rick’s expression doesn’t change at all - no body movements, no sounds, nothing. “Look, you don’t have to accept my apology or anything, I just want you to know I’m sorry and I regret it.” Negan is surprised by his own words. Somehow, Rick has such a tight hold on him it’s making him regret his behavior towards him, which has never happened before. Negan doesn’t regret shit, ever.
Rick is somewhat shocked by Negan’s apology. He doesn’t know the man well but he assumes he doesn’t apologize often, probably thinking he’s always right and never wrong.
“It’s ok, I forgive you.” He concedes, glancing to his side to look at Negan. He really doesn’t know why he didn’t hesitate to accept Negan’s apology; he didn’t even have to think about it, he just simply forgave him.
Silence falls over them again as Negan thinks. He hadn’t expected that to be so easy. What he did expect was for Rick to maybe go off on him, hit him with a few select words. He’ll gladly take this reaction over any other, though.
His eyes glance over to Rick’s things at some point, noticing his ruined book, still soaked with coffee. It reminds him of Rick’s bloody nose, how those worthless fucking frat guys had no problem with throwing the book at Rick’s perfect face - which is still perfect by the way, thank god. After observing Rick’s features up close, Negan still can’t comprehend the man’s beauty.
“Why’d they throw the book at you anyway?” Negan thinks out loud, realizing it later rather than sooner.
Rick sighs. He really doesn’t feel like explaining this. Of course if Negan finds out what the book is about, he’ll connect the dots easily and immediately know that Rick is gay. Not that Rick is ashamed, he never has been and doesn’t think he ever will be, but he prefers to keep his sexuality to himself when it comes to people he doesn’t know; or rather in this case, not familiar with.
“I don’t know. Guess they didn’t like what the book was about or somethin’.” He offers nonchalantly, hoping Negan doesn’t get too curious, but of course he does.
“Well now I gotta know what it’s about.” He smirks, standing from the couch and starting over to the table with Rick’s things.
“Negan, don’t. Please.” Rick tries, sounding completely wrecked, more than he actually looks.
Negan chuckles, rounding the table. “What’s so bad about a fucking book? Is it porn or some shit?” He teases, that devious smirk still planted on his lips. He picks up the book, reading the cover to himself - Red, White & Royal Blue - then flips it around. He reads the summary, beginning to end, word for word. “I don’t see what’s so bad about a gay book, Rick.” He deadpans with a soft roll of his eyes.
“I didn’t say it was bad, I just-“
“Hold the fuck on.” Negan interrupts, coming to a realization. “Did that fucking asshole throw this at you because of what it’s about?” He asks incredulously, brows furrowed.
Rick closes his eyes and sighs. He doesn’t want to talk about this anymore; he doesn’t want to have to practically come out to the guy who’s been teasing him since freshman year. Though, he assumes Negan isn’t homophobic, considering his nonchalant reaction to the book.
“I don’t really know. I guess? I mean, he made fun of me for readin’ that stuff, said I only read it because…no guy wants me or whatever.” Rick muttered, sort of hoping Negan didn’t catch that last part.
Negan puts the book down then makes his way back to the couch, sitting down. His knee brushed against Rick’s, eliciting a soft shiver from the smaller man.
“I’m sorry.” Negan says softly, turning himself towards Rick. He places a gentle hand on his lower thigh. “No one should be making fun of you for that shit. That’s not even something I would do.” He insists, voice full of rage and disgust.
Once again, Rick is surprised. It’s not that he expected Negan to be homophobic, but he really didn’t expect the man to apologize for the second time, either. He appreciates it, though, especially coming from someone like Negan who is very rough around the edges.
“Thank you.” Rick replied quietly. Negan’s hand on his thigh felt warm, almost too warm - like electricity was emanating from his hand. As a quick distraction, Rick removes the bundle of gauze from his nose, checking if he’s still bleeding. Surprisingly, it’s finally stopped. He takes a moment to wipe away any remaining blood on and around his nose. When he’s done, Negan interrupts his train of thought.
“Here, let me take it.” He says, holding his hand out, palm facing upwards. Rick gives him an unsure look, brows furrowed. “For fucks sake, Rick. Just give it to me.” He pesters lightly, cracking a soft smile.
Rick hands the gauze over hesitantly until it’s abruptly snatched from his hand. “Thanks.” He offers shyly, somewhat awkwardly. He watches Negan get up and retreat to the kitchen, coming back within a few quick seconds.
The silence that falls over them is comfortable. Rick is still resting his head against the back of the couch, just in case his nose starts to bleed again. Negan is almost mimicking him, though his head is turned towards Rick, simply watching him. Despite the silence being comfortable, Rick is nervous and still a bit on edge about all of this. His knee bounces up and down continuously, his fingers rubbing at the hem of his shirt. Apparently, Negan hadn’t noticed any of it.
“Has anyone ever told you you have the most gorgeous fucking eyes?” Negan asks, voice low and raspy. He watches for Rick’s reaction which is only a soft, red glow smeared across his cheeks, eventually gracing the tips of his ears. How such a normal compliment managed to fluster him is beyond Negan.
Rick is quiet for a moment, trying to process what Negan just said. Many people have complimented his eyes before, so surely Negan isn’t flirting with him. There’s just no way; he won’t believe it.
“Well, uh-sometimes yeah. Usually not as vulgar, though.” His attempt at a joke is extremely lousy. He just needed a distraction from his own awkwardness, though.
Negan huffs out a small laugh. “Well, they’re fucking gorgeous, Rick.” He wants to add more, say how his eyes are just as pretty as the rest of him, but quickly decides against it. After not realizing his teasing was making Rick uncomfortable, he doesn’t want to push it.
Rick cracks a soft smile, more to himself than to Negan. “Thank you.” He says, finally having the courage to turn his head towards Negan and actually look him in the eyes. The same soft smile on his own lips is also on Negan’s, which makes his heart skip a beat. Rick quickly finds that Negan’s eyes are also gorgeous - they’re a soft hazel with streaks of green mixed in. “Yours are too.” He offers, unaware he had actually said that out loud. Negan’s soft smile is quick to turn into a devilish smirk, but it’s the most endearing thing Rick has ever seen.
Negan manages to subtly inch closer to Rick, throwing an arm around his shoulders. “Would you be mad if I kissed you?” He asks, voice low and barely reaching a whisper.
Rick internally freezes when Negan wraps an arm around him. His touch is hot again and very foreign, but Rick finds himself leaning into it just slightly. The question is the next thing that makes him freeze even more, though. How the hell is he supposed to respond to that? He doesn’t know. He’s quiet as he thinks, pondering for a response that doesn’t sound stupid. How would he feel if Negan kissed him? That’s another thing he has absolutely no answer to.
“Sorry.” Negan grimaces, only at himself, though. He really didn’t want to fuck this up anymore than he already has, but it seems like that plan fell through. He backs away a bit as he continues speaking. “If you couldn’t already fuckin’ tell, I get way too ahead of myself sometimes and-“
“No.” Rick interrupts firmly.
Negan furrows his brows in confusion. “What?” He asks a moment later, voice soft and wary.
“That’s my answer to your question.” He states simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Negan’s expression doesn’t change, though, so Rick tries again. “I wouldn’t be mad if you kissed me, Negan.” He reiterates soft and quiet. His knee has stopped doing that nervous bounce, so he supposes that’s a good sign.
“Oh.” Negan nods once, understanding. “Are you sure?”
“Yes.” Rick spits out quickly; quicker than he can even comprehend. He decides to take the reins, shuffling closer to Negan until he’s snug against the other man’s warm body. Negan takes it from there, though, leaning in slowly and hesitantly. Their lips brush against each others softly, barely even connected until Rick takes that bit of control back and presses in further. The warmth from Negan’s lips is so much more intense than his hand resting on his thigh - it spreads through his entire body like fire, reaching every crevice.
Negan’s free hand rests on Rick’s hip, gripping him softly. He wants nothing more than to snake his hand under Rick’s shirt, feel his warm skin against his hand. He refuses to push any further, though. For now, the soft, slow movement of their lips is enough for him.
It’s not enough for Rick. Within a very short amount of time, he opens his mouth, slipping his tongue out to lick against Negan’s lips. Negan’s mouth opens almost immediately, allowing Rick entry. He explores as he pleases, licking Negan’s tongue, lips, teeth - anywhere he can reach.
A surprised little moan slips out of Negan. He’d normally not give a shit, but with Rick it feels different. He has this need to go slower, to be more gentle with him. He still wants to peruse his plan of not fucking this up. He doesn’t relent, though. He digs his fingers into Rick’s clothed flesh, but much softer than he actually wants. The arm wrapped around Rick’s shoulders curls around his neck, slipping his fingers into Rick’s hair which is much softer than he expected.
As their kiss intensifies Rick’s hands are gripping each side of Negan’s neck, rubbing his thumbs across his soft skin every now and then. He’s so caught up in all of this that he doesn’t even realize he’s moaning, throaty sounds slipping through his lips almost every second.
Negan pulls away shortly after, lips pulsing. “If we keep going I’m gonna get too worked up, darlin’.” He breathes heavily, throwing in a soft wink just because he can.
Rick sort of shrinks into himself, feeling a little embarrassed. “Yeah, uh-sorry.” He apologizes softly, retracting his hands from Negan’s space. He can’t help but stare at his lips - they’re swollen and pink, shining with spit. All he wants to do is lean in again and kiss him, but he knows he shouldn’t, as tempting as it is. “I have class soon anyway.” He adds after a long moment of silence.
“Me too.” Negan says, suddenly scrambling for things to say. He doesn’t want Rick to leave in all honesty. He’s enjoyable to be around, even the multiple times where Negan was just teasing him. Now that they both seem to be on the same page, Negan doesn’t want to leave his side. Call him clingy, but people don’t genuinely like him very often. He understands it’s hard for some people to be around him with how vulgar and bold he is.
Rick stands abruptly, heading over to the table with his things. He slips his backpack on and grabs his book, which is still soaked. “Thanks again for uh-cleanin’ me up. You really didn’t have to.” He concedes softly, stepping towards Negan again.
Negan stands, shaking his head back and forth. “It’s the least I could do after treating you like shit for a solid year.” He offers. He quickly scans Rick’s form up and down, taking all of him in for the millionth time. Negan won’t allow himself to think about all of the explicit things he wants to do to Rick, so he quickly interrupts his thoughts. “Let me walk you out.” He steps past Rick and makes his way to the front door, clearly hearing Rick’s footsteps trail behind him.
They stop under the doorway, both men suddenly becoming quiet and awkward. They only stare at each other for a moment, as if saying something with their eyes.
“Maybe we could hangout sometime? Get coffee or something?” Negan offers with a slight tilt of his head; just like Rick does so often.
“Yeah, I think I’d like that.” Rick agrees with a soft nod, accompanied with a smile. Negan smiles in return and suddenly Rick loves the way it looks on Negan’s face. His white, bright teeth, his dimples; he looks perfect.
Negan leans in without thinking, pressing his lips to Rick’s. It’s a quick, chaste kiss but it’s more than enjoyable to both men. Once Negan pulls away, Rick’s cheeks are quick to turn red, color creeping down his neck. Negan wonders how far it goes.
“See you soon.” Is the last thing Negan says. He watches Rick’s retreating back and admittedly, his ass too. Nonetheless, Negan thinks he’s far beyond attached now with no way out.