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Rang was going to die.
He was well aware that he was already living on borrowed time. It was rare for half-demons to live this long, let alone have another hundred years or so left in them. Learning that he’d simply be used and thrown away until the moment of his death left him caring little for his own mortality.
Which led Rang to the predicament he found himself in-- having gambled away his remaining years, leaving him on the brink of death with barely hours left to live. Rang sighed. He didn’t care. He wanted the pain that was life to finally swallow him whole, and free him from his endless torment.
So why was it that Yeon reacted with such a pained expression when he found him? How could someone like Yeon, his brother, the man who had cared little for him, even being the reason for his death, appear to be so shocked?
Rang never understood his hyung, but if he was entirely honest with himself, all he wanted was for Yeon to look at him with the same love and longing as he did. His affections would never be returned, his life would never be as long, and most importantly-- Rang would never experience the happiness he so desired.
Gazing down at Rang’s slumped form, seeing his brother on the verge of death, with nothing but a dwindling candle by his side-- Yeon didn’t hesitate, knowing what he must do.
This idiot-- how could he?
Rang, his beloved brother, now alive and well in the past, left with only the night until his death. He’d gambled away his remaining years, in what could clearly be seen as a rigged game. Rang hadn’t stood a chance, leading Yeon to wonder-- did his brother know, and aim to purposely shorten his life? The idea shocked Yeon to his core, hoping it wasn’t true.
Yeon cared for Rang more than anything else in this world. Why couldn’t he get that fact through his brother’s thick skull? What more did he have to say or do to ensure Rang understood him?
Yeon couldn’t lie anymore, opting to come clean to Rang entirely. He knew his brother wouldn’t believe his words, deciding it best for Rang to hear them from his future self instead.
But even still, he had to ensure Rang lived, and that his remaining years were happy and meaningful. If not for Yeon’s peace of mind, then for the guarantee of a smile on his brother’s face.
“Rang-ah!”
Yeon called for his brother, louder than anticipated, once his deal with the cheating demon had been resolved. His years had been returned, as were those Rang had gambled away-- both now safe from an unexpectedly shorter fate.
“How could you be so careless?” Yeon asked, a flash of betrayal quickly falling from his face.
“Were you expecting a thank-you for that?” Rang rolled his eyes, gradually rising back to his feet. “I mean nothing to you,” he stated matter-of-factly, remaining emotionless. “You’ll use me until I’m not worth anything anymore. All you’ve done now is delay the inevitable.”
“You idiot! Why would you think such a thing? Enough with your self loathing.” Yeon was losing his composure, as was common when it came to his brother-- and the thought of him dying again. “Don’t throw your life away because you think you’re a burden,” Yeon begged, holding a hand over his heart as he pleaded. “Why did you think I came back? What more do I have to do to prove how much you mean to me?”
“You’re so selfish, hyung,” Rang growled, and Yeon stepped back at his sudden shift in tone. “You throw yourself into my life, into my affairs, telling me to live a happy and fulfilling life.” Fists were clenched at his side, shaking uncontrollably. “Why would I care? You’re only going to leave me again in a few day’s time. I’m still going to die. There’s… no point.” Rang’s voice had lowered. The anger was fading, turning to sadness.
Yeon’s expression softened. He took a step closer again, reaching out, but hesitating an inch apart. “When you’re hurt, Rang-ah, I hurt too. Of course I’d risk my life for you. Of course I’d gamble my remaining years at the risk of retrieving yours.”
“Hyung…” Rang sighed, exacerbated. He shook his head, staring at his brother incredulously. “I don’t understand you, or why you care so much. I’m only going to die anyway. I’m not worth the trouble,” he said, as if he were the most unloved and disposable creature in existence.
Yeon’s heart was breaking. His mind flashed back to his final moments with Rang-- in his own past, in Rang’s future-- and the note Rang had left behind when Yeon had returned to life. That same searing pain in his chest, the loneliness and guilt, and all the grief that consumed him had now returned tenfold.
“Yes, you are worth it!” Yeon exclaimed, locking on to Rang’s shocked eyes. “No number of years would be worth living without you at my side. So please, Rang-ah… cherish your life, cherish the years you have left.” Yeon tried his best to bite back his tears, hands now fumbling at his brother’s shoulders. “If not for you, then for me. Please… cherish your life as much as I do, and let me spend these remaining days beside you.”
Rang eyed him carefully, swallowing thickly. He didn’t want to fight. He wanted everything that Yeon offered. But he was afraid to open up to Yeon again, afraid of further pain and hurt, afraid of being abandoned and left to die alone.
“From now until my final day, Rang-ah…” Yeon trailed off, staring down. His hands ran down Rang’s arms, now holding Rang’s hand in his own, gently. “I don’t want to be anywhere else,” Yeon confessed, feeling a weight gradually lifting from his chest.
The silence that followed felt longer than any other moment in Yeon’s life.
“Do you mean it, hyung?” Rang finally said, squeezing his hand. “Staying here, leaving your future behind… would that even make you happy? I can’t keep you here, knowing it would make you miserable, missing those you love.”
“You died for me, Rang-ah. I can’t go back to that nothingness.” Yeon freed his hands, stepping impossible close. He cupped Rang’s cheek, studying him, as if he was about to disappear. “And why would I return to the future, when the one I love is right here?”
Rang’s breath hitched, eyes wide and unblinking. Time felt like it came to a halt, and all he could see were Yeon’s eyes, and the sincerity behind them. “Hyung…” He whispered; the word barely leaving his lips. He couldn’t believe he wasn’t dreaming, and all words failed him.
“I didn’t just win back the years we’d gambled away. Instead, I…” Yeon licked his lips nervously, focusing back on Rang’s expression. “I combined them. I split them between us. Because I know that not only do I want to remain by your side, but I couldn’t stand living a single day after you’re gone.”
Rang blinked, struggling to comprehend what Yeon had done. It was so easy for his hyung to make such a life-altering decision on the spot, without even a hesitated breath. Was this truly his brother? The Yeon that Rang had known all these years was different. But this… Rang couldn’t deny he liked this side of his hyung, and now that they were together, he wasn’t convinced he’d ever be able to let go.
Rang chuckled, a smile tugged at his lips. “Remember what you told me when I was young, hyung?” He asked, reaching for the arm that held his face so affectionately. “Something like… a fox’s first love being their last?”
Yeon’s brow furrowed, curious about the current line of questioning. But he nodded, eager to hear more.
“That’s always been my biggest problem with you.” Rang bit his lip, always struggling to express his true feelings like this. “I tried to move on, I tried to love many others, like the mermaid. But you, hyung, you…” He had long since averted his eyes, a blush colouring his cheeks.
Then, it finally clicked, and Yeon understood.
“Rang-ah,” he gasped. “Are you saying--”
“Yes. And I was doomed from the start.” Rang replied before Yeon could finish his question. “Yet I always knew I would never capture your eye the same way. These feelings, though, they never ceased. The curse that comes with our fox blood, I suppose.” He laughed at how silly the words sounded aloud. “I always thought the last thing you’d fall for was a human, and yet--”
Rang’s words were cut short, but by no fault of his own. Large, warm hands reached for him, sliding along the edge of his jaw, cupping either side of his face. He was dragged closer, until no space remained between them.
Yeon had kissed him, Rang finally realised. It was a feeling he’d always dreamt, and imagined in so many ways. Yet this was nothing like his imagination, no-- it was better. Yeon’s lips were so soft against his own, lingering there, making no sign to move just yet.
Rang didn’t want the moment to end, hoping there was more to come.
“Rang-ah…” Yeon whispered, finally pulling them apart. “I’ve always tried to deny it, these feelings. I admit… you were always my one and only, yet I pushed you away, until you hated me. I was convinced being hated by you was better than being rejected. But I see now that all I’ve done is hurt you.”
Rang had never remembered a time when he’d seen his brother so emotional and vulnerable. But words had been spoken enough, and he had become impatient.
“Shut up,” Rang growled, and pulled Yeon back into another kiss. “I don’t want to hear it anymore. I don’t want excuses.” He sobbed through the next kiss, but Yeon didn’t hold back in response. “Make it up to me now, while there’s still time. Hyung, please--”
Yeon had lost control, kissing and clawing at Rang like a man making up for lost time. It became impossible to speak; their mouths far too preoccupied with devouring each other’s taste and cries, losing themselves in the other’s delicate touch.
Any lingering doubts Yeon held about returning to his time had all but disappeared, determined to stay by Rang’s side-- regardless of the price he would pay for his decision.