Work Text:
(God of Fear & Hunger gleefully prepares to slaughter herself an old god).
Vinushka: Help me, Allmer-wan Kenobi! You're my only hope!
Allmer: No! Bad God of Fear & Hunger! You can't go around chopping up poorly developed sentient trees! They're essential for the ecosystem.
GoF&H (bashful): Allmer-kun... I'm such a huge fan of yours.
Allmer (all warm and fuzzy): Really?
GoF&H: (hands him a drawing of their mortal selves slaying hordes of people): I loved the way you and your Apostles killed the sultans. SOBs really had it coming.
Vinushka: Little help, please!?
Allmer: Why do you want to chop up nature boy here? Did he hurt you?
GoF&H: No, not really. I got nothing against you, Vinny Boy, but you have to take one for the team.
Vinushka: What team!? I never agreed to join any team!
GoF&H: Bold of you to assume we need your permission.
Vinushka (crying tree-sap tears): Why are you doing this? Don't you know destroying nature means destroying life itself?
GoF&H: Oh don't be such a crybaby. What's a couple of lost woodland acres compared to the joy of knowing you inspired humanity to make some serious progress without the help of overrated asshole deities?
Vinushka: My father will know about this! He'll make the two of you pay dearly!
Gro-goroth (somewhere in the background): Way to go, newbie! Keep chopping up that overgrown weed!
Vinushka: FATHER, WHY!?
Gro-goroth: It's not everyday you get to fix one of your many, many, many accidents.
Sylvian: I would have to agree.
Vinushka: NOT YOU TOO, MOTHER!
Sylvian: Much as I hate to admit it, Fear is right, my son. Your death serves the greater good. We won't have anyone to bully, boss around, or sexy-fuse if the humans go extinct.
Vinushka: Greater good my roots! You just wanna watch them do the nasty!
Sylvian: Same difference.
Gro-goroth: We have your DNA stored somewhere in our Cloud. We'll bring you back to life... eventually.
GoF&H: Any last words, Joan of Bark? (Vinushka starts singing "Nearer My God to Thee," to everyone's annoyance. GoF&H drenches him in petroleum oil...).