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it was already past midnight.
everyone on the astral express were sound asleep, even the conductor.
except for you.
you’ve been on the express for a while now, a while before the trailblazer arrived.
it didn’t take long for you to get used to it, however.
so usually, you had no trouble falling asleep.
but for some time now, you found that your mind had been racing lately.
what were you even thinking about, anyway?
oh right.
you were thinking about him.
at first, it didn’t affect your sleep.
in fact, it was kinda nice to wonder if he has a softer side and think about it from time to time…
but even if you tried not to make it obvious, you were afraid of someone finding out about this somehow.
especially dan heng, considering his… past experiences with this certain someone.
of course, this certain someone was none other than blade.
dan heng was a pretty good friend of yours.
so if he were to find out about this, he’d be disappointed in you.
perhaps even more than disappointed.
because of the fact that you fell in love with his enemy.
why him? of all people, why him? why?
just why?
what did you even see in him?
why has your heart fallen for him?
so many questions…
yet no answer.
you’ve asked yourself these questions multiple times, but you’ve never found a single answer.
its been stressing you out for some time now.
you despised each and every one of the stellaron hunters, just like all the others.
but… you just couldn’t get yourself to dislike blade. you wish you could dislike him, but you couldn’t.
despite the things he’s done…
he’s the one you’ve interacted with the most as well.
yet you never noticed how he was slightly different with you.
a little more… gentle.
which explained why he never seemed to show any hostility towards you.
though you never paid it any mind.
no one knew about your little thing going on for blade.
and you had no plans on telling him or anyone about this. ever.
you always tried to push away any thoughts you had of him.
but no matter how hard you tried, you just couldn’t.
tonight was the same as usual.
you lied on your bed, wide awake as you stared at the ceiling.
so many thoughts you were going through your head right now.
“what if dan heng found out?”
“he’s not a good person, you shouldn’t think of him this way.”
“remember how he’s involved with dan heng’s past…”
after a few moments, you sat up on your bed and sighed.
“maybe i’ll just go take a walk…” you whispered to yourself.
“perhaps i’ll find a few enemies to fight as well…”
you picked up your weapon and carefully opened the door.
the lights in the hall were surprisingly still lit, so thankfully, you were able to see.
you tried to be as quiet and careful as possible.
you made your way to the train’s exit and open it slowly.
once you set foot outside, you closed the door behind you.
even though it was late, there were still some people strolling around the streets of xianzhou luofu.
you decided to head to stargazer navalia, you’d likely find an enemy or two dwelling there.
you spent a few minutes walking around cluelessly, until you saw a mara struck soldier in the distance.
“here we go…”
but before you could approach it, you heard a voice behind you.
a very familiar voice, actually.
“why are you here?”
you turned back to see who it was, only to be met face to face with blade.
of all people, you didn’t expect to see him here.
he had an unamused look on his face as he awaited your response.
“i should be asking you that,” you looked up at him.
he crossed his arms, slightly annoyed at you.
“i have my reasons,” he said.
“now answer my question.”
you sighed.
“i can’t sleep.”
your voice came out a little softer than it was supposed to.
“so i thought… maybe i’ll go find a few enemies to fight and wear myself out.”
“i see…” he nodded.
“and what if you end up getting hurt?”
you glared at him.
“you care a lot,” your tone was a bit harsh.
he seemed to be thinking for a short moment until he spoke once more.
“…why don’t you fight me instead?” he suggested.
once he said that, you immediately drew your weapon.
blade smirked at your eagerness to fight.
“i won’t be going easy on you…”
and you could tell that wasn’t a lie.
the duel began, and so far it was going well.
seems your training had really been paying off.
but at the same time, your thoughts began to distract you again.
especially since… you got a few shots of his face up close.
“was he always this handsome…?” you thought.
now it felt like his attacks were hitting harder.
that was because you were losing focus.
it didn’t feel like it was going on for that long.
and yet it felt like forever.
now you were just beginning to regret agreeing his suggestion to fight him.
yet at the same time, you were afraid of being ridiculed for saying no.
but… he doesn’t really look like that type of person.
once the duel had ended, he grabbed your hand and helped you back up.
even if he immediately let go afterwards, it did feel nice to hold his hand, even if it was only for a few seconds.
though he would never admit it, he also kinda liked the feeling of holding your hand.
for a moment, you just stood there in silence, mentally questioning yourself, until you heard his voice again.
“you’ve improved since we last met,” he said.
you didn’t look carefully, but you could notice a little smile on his face…
it was… kinda cute?
you crossed your arms and gave him an unamused look.
“flattery won’t work on me.”
you weren’t like this with anyone other than blade.
and he knew that. he’s heard about you a few times before.
but he couldn’t help but ask…
“…are you like this with everyone?”
you looked up at him.
“i don’t see why that matters.”
he just wanted to hear your response.
he couldn’t help but let out a chuckle at the annoyed expression you wore.
he found it to be a bit adorable.
the two of you stood in awkward silence for a minute.
blade began to think about the moment he held your hand.
it was short, but it felt nice.
and… he wanted to do it again.
his expression more serious now.
“give me your hand,” was all he said.
you looked up at him, confused, before you hesitantly reached out your hand towards him.
without saying anything else, he grabbed ahold of it.
you could feel your face heating up a little, but paid that no mind.
blade’s hand felt… cold and lifeless.
that wasn’t really a surprise, was it?
but yours felt… nice and warm.
he wanted to keep holding onto it. he didn’t want to let go.
he gave it a gentle squeeze, and you noticed that his expression changed.
he had a little smile on his face as well.
but it wasn’t a sinister smile for once.
its not something you’d expect from him.
you grew more and more confused by the second, but you didn’t complain.
his locked with yours, and all you could see was… love and warmth.
he gently brought you closer to him, pulling you into a hug.
his body felt cold as well. but… you didn’t mind, if you were being honest.
“i’ve grown to care a lot more about you these past few days…” you heard him whisper.
“its a strange feeling, but… one i’ve come to embrace…”
was this all a dream?
you felt so confused right now.
“you say that, but…” you began.
“i’m always giving you the cold shoulder…”
you heard him chuckling again.
“its quite clear thats not the real you…” he responded.
perhaps it was a bit obvious.
he’s seen a lot of people describing you as anything but cold or mean.
and besides, you weren’t this harsh with the other stellaron hunters…
“…you aren’t wrong,” was all you said.
snuggling close to him like this… it all felt like a dream.
a pleasant dream you didn’t want to ever wake up from.
you two stayed close and enjoyed each other’s company in silence for the next few minutes.
after some time had passed, blade looked up and let go of you.
his expression was serious again.
“its getting late,” he said.
“you should head back…”
you slowly nodded.
you really didn’t wish to leave, but at the same time, you also didn’t wish to take up more of his time.
“…do you… think we’ll meet again…?” you asked, shyly.
he smiled at you once more.
“i’m sure we will.”
you smiled back at him, and without saying anything else, you headed back to the astral express.
this was going to be on your mind for the rest of your night.
and you didn’t mind. not at all…