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The village split into three paths on a rise. The plentiful huts of mud and wood, with dipping roofs, were evenly spaced and surrounded by tall and verdant pine trees. It was mostly quiet. Some taps of hammers on wood, the echoes of conversation, the singing of cicadas. But most of the noise came from the excited chatter of tourists, species different from Togruta, commenting on the food, snapping their picts, and laughing as they engaged in cultural activities. The village itself was depleted: those not lived in, or not given over to hotels, were empty, gathering dust and darkness along the paths. Most of the people, the young primarily, had gone out to the central cities or off-world in search of better opportunities. Only the central pathway had any real life to it.
Or at least, that's what Barriss Offee surmised had occurred. She couldn't sense presences in the outer huts, and when you got down to the essentials, the dynamics of economic change were not so different from planet to planet.
She walked up the central dirt road, her hood drawn over her head. The drape of her skirt caught the flakes of dust that spilled up from her boot tread, giving the dark purple fabric a reddish highlight, but she ignored it. She peered around her, trying to pick out someone to talk to. But there weren’t many Togruta around; mostly it was other species, busy taking picts, or jaunting around the village.
Halfway up she spotted an orange-skinned woman with tall montrals and long lekku, blue patterned and with white markings for browns enclosing a rhombus, sat on a stool whittling away at a wood carving. Some trinkets and models were set out on the table in front of her, and she wore a light blue tunic with a darker blue poncho, the hood pulled back.
Barriss approached her. "Um, excuse me?"
The woman ceased whittling and looked up.
"I'm looking for some information."
The woman raised a sickle-shaped brow marking and returned to her whittling. "I'm afraid I don't know anything about rebels, Separatist dissidents or Jedi."
"What? Oh, no! Sorry, I'm not asking about that," Barriss quickly said, waving her hands. "I'm...asking about...marriage rituals..."
"Ah, now that is more interesting." The woman looked back with a sly smile. "Has some Togruta caught your fancy, or are you just looking for something special?"
Barriss coughed, cheeks darkening. "I...she is a Togruta, yes. I had read about the gifting. I have a trophy and I want to turn it into a symbol but..."
“You want some help? Want to do it properly?”
Barriss nodded.
"Then you have come to the right place!" The woman threw up her arms and grinned. She set down the knife and model she was working on and stood up, pushing her hips forward and cracking her back. She settled back and smiled. "Now, what is the name of your beloved?”
Barriss blinked. "I...is that strictly necessary?"
“It depends. Would you like the real version or the one I give to tourists?”
“The...real one. Preferably.”
"Then I need the name. Just the last will do." She looked expectantly.
Barriss glanced around, nervous. There was no one nearby but...she learned to be cautious in Imperial space. "It’s...well, it’s...T-Tano...” she whispered.
The woman's eyes widened. "Tano?” Her eyes narrowed. “Tano...Tano, Tano, Tano, ah yes!” She clicked her fingers. "A noble, if unspectacular lineage."
“Oh...that’s...” Barriss frowned. “Good?”
“Very good. Nobility is very important.” The woman ran an assessing eye over Barriss and Barriss tried not to shift uncomfortably. “Well, are you eager to begin?”
“Yes. Absolutely. I have the trophy...” She slung her pack around and started to rummage inside, but the woman held up a hand forestalling her.
“Ah, we are not there yet. First, we need to go into the forest.”
Barriss cocked her head.
“You are in luck. Some Tanos used to live in this very village. Their ancestors need to speak with you.”
Barriss eyes widened. She hadn’t encountered that part of the ritual in her extensive reading. Really she’d just wanted some advice around cutting, but if it was the proper thing. “Ah...okay...”
“I will get supplies, you wait here.” The woman tapped the blue button on the door and it slid open in a hesitant jerk. She kicked it the rest of the way. “Needs oiling,” she muttered.
“S-supplies?” Barriss enquired. “This...this isn’t dangerous is it?”
"Oh no. I don’t think you have a scent an Akul would enjoy.” The woman threw a mischievous grin over her shoulder, which did not, in any way, help answer Barriss’ question.
Though when the woman was gone, she did take a surreptitious sniff of her clothes.
Barriss followed the woman into the forest who, in a not very reassuring way, had a rifle slung over her shoulder alongside her backpack. The forest was dense with pines, but there were cuts and pathways in the tops of the trees that let light through. The sun had begun its descent, casting some long shadows, but the woman assured her that this was a good thing as most of the predators were diurnal.
Barriss didn't know if she wanted it clarified as to what 'most' constituted. But, shouldering her pack now with added supplies, she reassured herself that she had her lightsabre if the need arose. Hopefully, it wouldn’t though.
It was cool in the forest, with a humid atmosphere, and her boots cricked and snapped twigs as she walked past the tall green grass and red and orange ferns. They had been on a path but had come off it into a deeper layer of trees, and Barriss worked her way past trunks and rocks. There was...much life in the place. The feeling touched her through the Force, gently, warming her. She smiled, hearing some birds fluttering and chirping.
"Aha!" the woman announced, slowing to a halt. "Here we are."
Barriss looked around her. The stretch they were in didn’t seem any different to the previous ones. Some purple bulbs with white spores on top, but otherwise it was the same layers of trees.
"It's very nice," Barriss said, unsure if she was supposed to be appreciating anything.
The woman smiled. "Thank you." She gestured at the surrounding. "These trees contain the spirits of our village ancestors."
"I...I see..." Barriss said, taking in the numerous trees. "You said I needed to speak to them?"
"Yes. If you wish to marry this girl, then you need to receive their blessing."
"I see. And which tree houses the Tano ancestors?"
"That is for you to find."
"That is for me to what?"
The woman grinned. "This is a test of your love. If it be true, then the ancestors will guide you to the right tree. And they will speak to you. If not...” She shrugged. “You could be here a long time.”
Now the bundles of food made sense...
“But...but how will I...?” Barriss croaked, staring at all of the looming and leering trees, aghast.
"By listening. With your ears. And with your heart." The woman slung her backpack down and removed some tools from it: something that looked like a stethoscope, with a conical end, and thin and sharp needle. "Penetrate the tree until you release the sap, and then listen to it. Hear them with your heart."
Barriss' open jaw tried to work into words as she took the tools from the woman.
“I will leave the rifle with you, just in case.” She winked, setting the rifle on the ground, and then she stretched up and put her arms through the backpack straps. “Now, I must go.”
"You're leaving?!" Barriss shrieked, her voice echoing through the leaves.
"Yes. It is late and I have much to do." She put a hand on Barriss' shoulder. "You will be fine. Return by the path, walking West, and I will help you with the next step. Take as long as you need."
And with that, the woman walked off humming a song, Barriss' 'um' dying in her throat.
She wiped at her shoulder where the woman had squeezed and turned back to look up at the trees that surrounded her. She looked down at the tools in her hand and then shook her head violently, drawing up straight.
Come on Offee! she chided herself. You have the Force. And your...love is true. This should be easy.
She wasn’t confident in using the tools, so she decided to start by listening with the Force. She could move on to the tools if she didn’t have any success. But she should. After all, if there were spirits in there she would be able to hear them through the Force.
She approached the first tree, stopping in front of it and tentatively reaching out a hand. "H-hello?" she queried, grazing her fingers against the cool bark. She resisted the urge to bang her forehead against the trunk and instead calmed herself.
She slowed her breathing. Slowed her mind. Put aside her thoughts.
She listened to the sound of the forest. To the life of the forest.
She waited until the life was all she felt until it was just her and the tree and stillness itself.
And reached...
She felt into the trunk. Felt the sap running inside its veins, along the branches and the roots, the movement of water within it, giving it life. The breathing of the leaves and their gentle turn to follow the sunlight. The roots connecting beneath the soil, joining up with the other pines, circulating information between them, an entire ecosystem beneath her feet and surrounding her.
But she didn’t feel any spirits. No ancestors residing within. Nothing spoke to her.
She withdrew her hand and her consciousness, coming back to the awareness of her surroundings.
She frowned, scrunching her lips.
Must not be the Tano tree...
She started over to the next one, placing her fingers on the bark and breathing.
The door jerked open and the woman looked up from where she read in her wicker chair to see a dishevelled and distraught Barriss stumble into the room. She slung the pack to the ground and collapsed onto her hands and knees.
The woman put her book aside and leaned forward.
"So...how did it go?" she asked.
Words wouldn't form in Barriss' mouth. She worked her jaw but her throat wouldn’t respond. She shook her head and looked up, pained.
The woman smiled sympathetically. "Not so well?" she said.
"No," Barriss croaked. "I...I spoke with every tree. Multiple times. I searched on from the area you showed but...but nothing..." She’d been out there for hours. Out there until her legs were exhausted and her brain could barely function. Feeling the chill in her bones. Before despondently making her way back.
She dropped her head, ashen, desperate, her heart wrenching from the silent judgement that the ancestors had offered. "What...what does that mean?” she whimpered. “Are the ancestors saying I'm not worthy?" Because of course how could she be? After everything she'd done how could she possibly--
She heard a snort.
Barriss looked up. The woman was shaking her head and waggling her hand, her mouth creasing into a smile, tears staining her eyes.
Barriss processed this sight. She heard a clunk somewhere in her brain as the servers finished computing and put it together.
"Aghh..." she groaned, collapsing. "There is no Tano tree is there?"
"No," the woman confirmed.
"There are no ancestral trees at all, are there?"
The woman wavered her hand. "It’s debated."
Fury and frustration swept through her, her cheeks burning with embarrassment. "Then why did--!"
"Because," the woman said, patiently, squatting in front of Barriss, "love is not something that you have or you don't. It is something you work at.” She gently took Barriss’ hands and massaged them. “Day after day. And the most important part of it working is honesty."
Barriss' stared. Her anger and embarrassment faded as she looked into her eyes, realizing what she was saying.
"If you were willing to lie to yourself, you'd be just as willing to lie to your partner, no?"
Barriss dropped her head, fingers scrunching into her skirt. "Yes...I suppose..." she said, quietly.
A gentle touch at her jaw raised her head up. The woman smiled. "Do not fret. You have made mistakes. You will make more. So will she. But the joy of work is that you can always get better. So long as you're willing to try. And...I think someone who spent half a day trying to listen to trees has shown a certain dedication."
Barriss couldn't stop the slightly silly smile and blush that crept up her cheeks.
"Now, you could do with some rest I think," the woman said, standing and helping Barriss up. "In the morning, I will show you how to create your gift."
Barriss followed her through a joining corridor to another section of the house, which split into two rooms, both with open doors. The woman led her into the room on the right and indicated a nest of rugs on the floor that formed the bed.
"I hope you don't mind?" the woman said, gesturing at the rugs.
"Not at all. I've slept on much worse." Barriss smiled and settled onto the rugs. They were soft, nice on her skin, very comfy and warm. The room was bare other than a shelf with some statues stacked on it, and a small powered-down construction droid, and...
A tiny wooden cot in the corner.
Barriss stared at it and looked to the woman, whose eyes had also caught on it, a sorrowful expression on her face.
"You have...a child?" Barriss asked.
"I had a child," the woman replied softly. She stroked her fingers on the cot.
"I'm sorry," Barriss said quietly, feeling her pain.
“I took her on a hunt, a ritual for the young ones, so they learn the value of life. An Akul took her when I left her in the field." Her eyes and fingers lingered on the cot then she took them away with a shake of her head, smiling. “Ah, but it is nothing. Long ago.”
"It must have been hard...” Barriss murmured, everything she’d lost swimming at the edges of her memory.
"It was. But it is the life given to me. I do what I can with it." The woman smiled warmly. "Rest well. Should you require any food or water, the kitchen is open to you.”
Barriss inclined her head. “Thank you. For your hospitality. And your wisdom.”
“Please. My honour.” The woman inclined her head back and left the room.
Barriss swaddled the rugs around herself, taking off her clothes beneath them, and settled into their warm embrace. She felt drowsiness creep over her, as her despair receded, but before falling away she reached out and snatched her pack, pulling from it a holorecording that she snapped on.
It wasn’t much. Just Ahsoka smiling, then making a goofy face, in the ghostly blue light. But it made her giggle and smile.
“I miss you...” she whispered, tracing a finger across the image. They’d agreed not to contact, being careful not to be traced. But it was hard.
She watched the recording a little more, then turned it off and clutched the recorder tight to her as she curled up for sleep.
The metal plate, obtained from Sixth Brother’s helm, was clamped between two stands over a bucket of water. It was held firmly, but not so much it had no flexibility. On it she’d traced her old heart symbol, what she wanted to give, and in her thickly gloved right hand she held the plasma cutter, a cylindrical device with a thin nozzle, loosely.
She'd spent the day practising, following the woman's instructions, working with paper initially and then moving up to some wood to practice with the tools. It wasn’t hard to master. In many ways the cutter was a miniature lightsabre; though it didn’t cut as well so she needed to be cautious in compensating how it would react to the metal, especially when tracing the pattern. This was where her training and use of the force would come in handy.
She studied the metal plate, mentally mapping out where she would start and the flow her hand would take as she drew across the design, where the tolerance would be and how to adjust. She secured the goggles over her eyes.
She brought the nozzle over the start of the line, at the dip between the two bumps of the heart, paused to take a breath and steady her hand.
She depressed the trigger and the nozzle hissed to life. It burnt and fizzed through the start of the line and Barriss slowly and carefully moved it along. The water beneath caught bits of molten metal and they hissed as they struck, the sparks flaring down. She stretched into the Force and guided it to her hand and then allowed it to guide her hand, forgetting the world around her.
She existed on a plane where it was just her, the plasma cutter, and the metal. The noise, the hissing of the water and the shriek of the metal faded.
She traced the line, gently, lovingly.
The nozzle reached the starting point and she shut it off. White lines flared around the incision and she set the nozzle down, keeping the point away from the ground, and used her gloved hands to push the symbol through so it dropped and fizzed into the water.
She waited a moment, then reached into the bucket, the water warm now from the metal, and fished out her symbol and held it across her palm. An exact replica, though smaller, of the design that had sat on her belt. She removed the goggles to look at it fully, glittering a little from the sunlight that touched the water across its face.
Perfect.
She closed her fingers around it and held it tight to her chest, feeling it through her fist. After staying that way for a long moment, she grinned and walked into the house to show her creation to the woman.
"I did it!" she announced.
The woman looked up from where she was whittling a wooden emblem. She peered at Barriss' hand and smiled.
"You've done well," she said, and Barriss felt a swell of pride. "Simple, but a very clean cut. I can't see any sharp ends that need refining."
“Thank you,” Barriss said. “Without your instruction, I definitely would not have made something this nice.”
“You have patience, that is all that is needed.” The woman got up, holding up a hand. “Oh, I have something for you.”
Barriss waited as the woman walked into the other room. She soon returned and Barriss furrowed her brow. Cradled in her hands was a little splinter of wood.
The woman smiled. "It’s another part of the tradition. The spirits of ourselves exist in what we touch, what we use, what we engage with. This house will carry my spirit, and my husband’s and my daughter’s. Normally you are supposed to include something of the person in the gifting, but...I thought you might like to take this shard from my daughter’s cot.” She held it out to Barriss. “A little something of Shilli to complete the marriage.”
Barriss stared wordlessly at the splinter. What the woman was offering was...a great honour. Truly special. "I...I don't know what to say..."
"‘Yes’, then," the woman laughed.
Barriss bowed her head. “Thank you. This will mean a lot to both of us.”
The woman nodded gently, her smile straining slightly. She held out her hand. “If you’ll permit me...?” she said. Barriss looked confused a moment, then realised what she was asking and handed over the symbol. “I’ll affix a pouch to the back that will enclose the wood. Make it easier to keep the ensemble together, as she attaches it to the headpiece."
"That's very kind of you."
"It is nothing." She put a hand on Barriss' shoulder. "Now you go and rest. Leave this with me."
Barriss nodded her thanks. She was feeling tired. Focusing on the practice and the act had made her ignore her body, but the ache of sitting in one position for so long was creeping on her quite powerfully.
She stretched her body, wincing at the cracks in her spine and the tension in her muscles, and moved toward the bedroom she was sleeping in. She covered a yawn and discreetly wiped at her shoulder as she did so. She glanced over her shoulder as she crossed the threshold and saw the woman sitting at her small table, staring at the symbol of wood.
There was something...caring about the way she held it.
It's safe in her hands, she thought, finding her way to the room and slumping onto the rugs.
Barriss started up the ramp of the Obsidian, Ahsoka agreeing that she should take the YT-2400 light-freighter, and the woman wandered up behind her, admiring the ship.
"So you and your partner travel in this?" she asked.
"Yes," Barriss said, dropping her pack onto the floor. "I'm heading off to collect her, she should have finished by now, I think. If not, I can try and enjoy Mirial for a bit.”
“Ah, your home planet.”
“Yes...not been there in a long time.”
The woman stroked her fingers along the wall of the bare storage hold. "It is a nice ship. Well maintained." She pulled her hand away and flicked it, dust scattering from her fingers. "Could do with a clean."
Barriss chuckled. "Yes, almost certainly.” She gestured at the door to the lounge. “Would you like to come in? I can offer you a tea?”
“Oh no, I have kept you from your fiancée long enough,” the woman laughed. “I’ll head back to the village.”
Barriss smiled and bowed. “Thank you, for your help. I would never have..." She paused, her throat tightening a little. "It has...given me much confidence. In myself. And my love.”
And it had truthfully. She knew she loved Ahsoka, but even after all this time, she wasn’t always sure she was worthy of it. But the idea of working at it, practising it, becoming it...
That was something she could do.
"You have a good heart. You’ll both be fine." The woman smiled and opened her arms and Barriss stepped forward, allowing herself to be hugged and hugging the woman back.
She supposed, after all the help she'd had, it was the least she could.
"You look after her," the woman whispered.
Barriss frowned. The woman pulled out of the hug, resting her hands on her shoulders. Barriss looked up at her and for the first time, she noticed the woman’s sky-blue eyes, sparkling slightly.
"I...I will do," she said, a little confused.
The woman nodded. Smiled tightly. Then she stepped back and down the ramp. "Good luck to you both!" she called over her shoulder.
"Thank you and may the--good health be with you!" Barriss replied.
The woman waved over her shoulder, heading away toward the pines.
Barriss watched her go, then hit the button for the ramp. She turned away and started toward the door to the lounge, her frown deepening.
Look after her...
She paused. She dug her hand into the pouch at her belt and took out the emblem. The heart, with the little wooden splinter, threaded through the back.
I thought you might like to take this shard from my daughter’s cot.
Her eyes widened.
She spun and slapped the ramp release button, the ramp juddering to a halt halfway and then descending again. She ran out onto it, holding the strut.
"Wait! What did you say your name--?!"
But the woman was gone. All she saw was the breathing of the leaves.
Barriss stared at the trees, thinking about going after her, thinking about going to the village to find her.
But...but she wouldn’t be there. Probably hiding in the forest. If she’d wanted Barriss to know...
Her heart twisted, but reluctantly she turned away and hit the button to close the ramp, clutching the now even more precious emblem tight.
She saw her sitting on some crates, her legs kicking, as the Obsidian descended. Barriss peeked out through the viewport and held up a hand. Ahsoka grinned and waved an arm back.
By the Force, it was good to see her again.
Barriss set the ship down and hurried through the deactivation sequence. That completed, she raced along the access tunnel, through the workshop and the lounge and to the storage hold, where the ramp was already descending.
Ahsoka stormed up the ramp. "Barriss! Your people!" she declared in exasperation, striding past Barriss as she stood with a frozen smile on her face.
Not exactly the opening words Barriss had been expecting but...
"My...my people what?" Barriss queried, hitting the ramp button and turning around to follow Ahsoka into the lounge.
Ahsoka dropped her pack onto the ground and threw herself sullenly onto the sofa. "That man was, without doubt, the most frustrating, demanding and difficult master I have ever had!"
Barriss thought back on her previous masters. "That...is some achievement..."
Ahsoka flopped a hand over her face and groaned. "Tell me about it..."
Barriss watched her silently from the doorway, not entirely sure what to do. None of her rehearsals of this scene had quite played out this way.
Ahsoka drew her hand off her face, revealing a creeping grin. "So, are you going to stand there are you going to say hello?"
Now that she knew what to do.
Barriss laughed and swept over to Ahsoka. Ahsoka sat up, creating space, and Barriss sat down beside her and threaded her hands behind her back lekku, touching their foreheads together. They pressed their lips together and Barriss melted into the kiss.
"I missed you," she whispered.
"I missed you too," Ahsoka replied.
They held the kiss a little longer and then Barriss pulled back. Ahsoka rearranged herself and plotted her head onto Barriss’ lap, shifting her back lekku so it draped over Barriss’ legs. Barriss lightly feathered her fingers across Ahsoka's montrals, alternating strokes with taps, and Ahsoka purred.
"Do you want to see Mirial?" she asked.
Barriss shook her head. "Not really. It’s not my home. I just want to be with you."
"That sounds nice."
"It does, doesn't it?"
Ahsoka chuckled.
Barriss looked down at her, taking in the facial markings, the colouring of the lekku, her eyes, bright as the sky, with starlight rippling behind the pupil.
"What is it?" Ahsoka asked, curiously, noticing Barriss’ stare.
Barriss opened her mouth. Closed it. She’d debated about what to tell Ahsoka but...figured that if the woman hadn’t told her she probably didn’t want it to be known. And in any case, she wasn’t certain but...
She smiled and shook her head. “You...you weren’t ever...taken by an Akul were you?”
"Taken by an Akul...?" Ahsoka brown squinched together. “I don’t remember it, but Maser Plo said that one tried to eat me. That’s how the village knew I was Force-sensitive because I was able to tame it." She traced her fingers across Barriss' cheek. "Why?"
Barriss shook her head and smiled. "No...nothing...just a story I heard from someone...of a noble if unspectacular lineage."
Ahsoka stared deep into her eyes for a moment and then smiled. She leaned up and kissed Barriss and then swung her feet out. "Okay, I'm going to get us underway! And then we can do the exchange!"
"So soon?" Barriss asked, standing.
"Of course!" Ahsoka grinned. "I don't want to waste a second more!"
They knelt in their bedroom, small but where they felt most at home.
The ship floated somewhere alone in space. It didn't really matter where; all that mattered was they were alone and among the stars.
It was a ritual, but a ritual between two best friends and lovers. So naturally, despite the importance and solemnity, there were many side glances and giggles, and corpsing smiles. Ahsoka in a woven tunic, of burgundy and gold, and a plain black headpiece. Barriss in a long robe, a hijab draped over her hair.
Barriss reached out a hand. Ahsoka took it and gently massaged her thumb over the space between Barriss’ index finger and thumb.
She looked so beautiful, her eyes glimmering like the last burst of a star.
"Should I start?" Ahsoka asked.
Barriss nodded demurely.
"Well..." Ahsoka turned her head, suddenly shy. "Even though this is...without any witnesses..."
"That's not true!" Barriss protested. "We have the Living and Cosmic Force as our witness."
Ahsoka blinked at her.
Barriss blinked back.
Slowly, Ahsoka turned her eyes upward, as Barriss furtively looked over her shoulder, to check that Master Yoda wasn’t looking on disapprovingly from the corner.
Their eyes returned to each other.
"Even though this is without any witnesses," Ahsoka repeated.
"Not a single one," Barriss agreed.
"I want to say...that...I love you. Which you know," she added, drawing a chuckle from Barriss. "But that..." She reached out and put her other hand over Barriss'. "You’ve always been there for me Barriss. I’ve always been able to tell you anything and you’ve always listened, no matter how stupid and small it was. We’ve had our rough patches...but we came through them, together. And that’s what I will be for you. The person who’s always there for you.
"I can’t promise to be perfect. I can’t promise to always get everything right. But you have my solemn word, that whatever happens, I will always be there. And I will always try.
"Don't say the line," she said, with a smile as Barriss opened her mouth.
Barriss giggled and leaned over and kissed Ahsoka's hand.
"And, per Mirialan tradition, I’ll confirm my vow by conferring new tattoos on you. But, you know, later because it would kill the mood to do it now."
Barriss laughed. She placed her hand over Ahsoka’s, her throat and chest tightening with emotion. “I know you will,” she said, voice thick. “And it will always mean a lot to hear you say it.”
Ahsoka nodded gently, her eyes welling a little, and Barriss closed her eyes, drawing on the words she'd composed and recomposed.
"This might sound rehearsed, and that's because it is."
Ahsoka laughed.
"But you know me; anxiety and perfectionist tendencies. But know that I feel every single word."
"Including the 'ands'?"
"Especially the 'ands'."
They shared a giggle.
Barriss took a slow breath.
"Ahsoka...you already know how much you changed my life, and how much you mean to me. I can imagine my life without you, but I don’t want to. Even from when we first met, you were always a part of it. Though the extent back then was just as good friends, Knights together righting the wrongs of the galaxy. Maybe having time to talk, and moan about Padawans.”
Ahsoka chuckled.
“But I always wanted more. Even when I told myself I shouldn’t.
“A lot has happened since and now...I have the more I always wanted. And I will never forget that. Or diminish it. Or think that, whatever horrors happened to make it possible...that we went through together...in this...I have been more lucky than I deserve."
She stared at their joined hands for a moment. The threatening tears dropped and streaked across her cheeks. "Thank you," she whispered. "I'll always love you."
"I know," Ahsoka whispered, swallowing.
Barriss sniffed and smiled. "And, to represent this, I give to you my heart..." She reached into her robe and took out the heart symbol, with the shard of wood laced into it. Ahsoka took it and stared at it, her lips wobbling.
"Your little heart symbol," she breathed.
"Yes. Figuratively and metaphorically, my heart will always be with you."
"And what's the wood?"
"It's...a sacred piece of wood, from Shilli. Part of the tradition."
Ahsoka's eyes glimmered at Barriss and she pressed the heart to her chest. "It’ll never leave me."
"I know."
They stared at each other for a long moment and then leaned forward. Their lips pressed together and their connection sparkled between them as two stars joined.
Barriss studied her new tattoos in the mirror. A diamond in the centre of her forehead, the same as Ahsoka’s, framed by two rectangles above her eyebrows.
She smiled wondrously. Beautiful.
"What do you think?" Ahsoka asked a touch of anxiety in her voice, hovering behind Barriss’ shoulder.
"I love them," Barriss smiled at her through the mirror. "Thank you."
"You're really happy with it?"
"You did a wonderful job."
"Really?" Ahsoka squinted. "I think the right one is a little out of alignment..."
Well...yes...Barriss had noticed that the right one had a slight dip in it, which meant it wasn’t exactly mirrored on the left. But it was fine! There wasn't any problem with that! It gave a unique flavour.
"It's a little off," she admitted, "but it's not a problem."
"Really?" Ahsoka's lips twitched. "You're not going to sneak out in the middle of the night and correct it?"
"Of course not!" Barriss protested. Why would she think that? Of course, Barriss could see it was out of alignment, and she couldn’t stop her eyes from tracking to it. A little filling-in would fix it, but she didn’t want to. It was from Ahsoka, an expression of her love, and if it was a little out of alignment that just gave it more personality. Barriss would get used to it.
"It's fine, I like it! It's unique, it's very you, it's..."
It was out of alignment. She couldn’t unsee it. But it was fine. It wasn’t like it was itching. Forcing her to keep looking at it. Making her hand twitch.
"It's..."
Ahsoka pressed her lips tight together, a small squeak escaping.
"It's...it's bothering me, give me the needle!" Barriss thrust out her hand, admitting defeat.
Ahsoka laughed and gently kissed her cheek as she put the needle in her hand.