Archive of Our Own

“I need to move in this weekend,” Yangyang announces as soon as Renjun picks up the phone.

“This weekend?” he frowns. “What’s happened?”

“Nothing bad! The adoption process is going quicker than expected, and Kun wants me out this weekend so he can redecorate my room for the baby.”

Kun’s voice echoes down the phone from Yangyang’s end. “Don’t say it like that!”

Renjun’s worries ease, marginally. “That’s exciting!” he says, fond. “Haeun will be replacing you in no time.”

“It’s not like that!” Kun complains again, closer this time, and both Yangyang and Renjun laugh at him. “You were going to move in with Renjun’s pack anyway!”

“It’s true, we’re as good as ready for you,” Renjun says, fiddling with the pen on his desk. “I only wanted you to move in later so you’d miss mating season, but it’s not like we can’t fit you in now.”

“Is it really okay? I can always stay a little longer if people don’t want my scent around the house yet.”

He glances around the office. He’s one of the last here, so it’s not like there are many people to listen in on his conversation, but he still likes to keep his private life private. “It’s okay. Mark and Jeno aren’t territorial, and it’s not like your scent isn’t already all over the house. I’ll come over tomorrow and we can talk about it, okay?”

“Tomorrow is Friday,” Yangyang says. “I’m packing today if you want to come and help.”

“Are you really asking if I want to tackle your pigsty room? Voluntarily? Today?”

“Haeun will be here tonight, if you want to meet her,” Kun chimes in. “She’s spending the evening with us.”

“I’ll pick up Donghyuck and come over tonight,” he says, and Yangyang laughs down the phone. “I’m not tackling your belongings alone, baby or no baby.”

Yangyang laughs again. Renjun smiles to himself at the sound, and decides his working day is as good as over.

-

He texts ahead and picks up Donghyuck straight from leaving work, but doesn’t tell him the news until they’re in the car together.

“He’s moving in this weekend?” he asks, eyebrow raised. “Isn’t that the last thing you want?”

“I don’t think it’ll be that bad,” Renjun says, gripping the steering wheel, eyes on the road.

“The first time we spent mating season together, you threw up for thirty minutes straight when I first arrived home, because I smelled like the alpha I was doing a project with. I’d spent two hours with him, and it was enough to have you in agony all night.”

“This is nothing like that. I’m well-adjusted to Yangyang’s scent, I don’t think it will change anything if he moves in now. And my heat usually only hits once yours triggers it, and you don’t get triggered until it gets cold, which won’t be until the end of the month. We have weeks for Yangyang to get settled. I was worried more about you. It’s early in your relationship for him to be around you in heat.”

“I don’t care about that,” Donghyuck shrugs. “I was spending my heat with whoever was around before I started seeing Jeno.”

“That is how you started seeing Jeno. He was one of the guys who was around.”

“Yeah, and that worked out well, didn’t it? Longest running relationship within the pack. If Yangyang wants to get involved with me in heat, fine, all the better for me. But you know a change to your environment right before your heat is gonna freak you out, even if it is a good change. Then there’s Chenle to think about this time, too. We don’t know how he’s going to react.”

Renjun bites at his lower lip, turning the car into the road that leads to Yangyang’s apartment block. “I thought about him too. But we don’t have much of a choice. Kun and his mates need Yangyang’s room sooner rather than later. If we ask him to sleep somewhere else during mating season, but all his belongings are already in our house, I think that will make me more anxious when my heat hits. I like knowing where everyone is, and this will be my first heat dating Yangyang.”

Donghyuck sighs, waiting for Renjun to park up. “I think we can do it. But you need to warn him what your heat is like ahead of time.”

“Right,” he laughs, humourless. “Or he’ll be running away before he’s even settled in.”

They leave the car and buzz Kun’s apartment, where they’re let in quickly. Renjun forgets about all his worries when Ten answers the door, practically aglow, and he comes inside to the view of Yangyang lying on the floor beside baby Haeun, playing with one of her little hands.

“Hyung, she’s gorgeous!” he exclaims, coming to sit on the floor beside Yangyang and waving at Haeun fondly. “Hi, baby!”

“Hello to you too,” Yangyang says, but his huge smile says he’s as enamoured as Renjun is. Haeun has these wide, shiny eyes, trained up on Renjun as he coos at her, but she’s gripping one of Yangyang’s fingers tight in her baby fist.

“Haeun, this is your uncle Renjun,” Johnny says from behind the baby, picking her up and holding her against him. “Say hello.”

“Do I get to be uncle too?” Donghyuck pouts, coming to stand behind Renjun, hands on his shoulders. “She’s so cute, I’m going to die.”

“Fine, but Yangyang isn’t allowed to date any more of you until she can say the word ‘uncle’,” Ten says. “She’s gonna have way too many uncles otherwise.”

“Can I hold her?” Renjun asks, and Johnny beckons him forwards without question, arranging Haeun carefully in his arms.

“Why didn’t I get to hold her?” Yangyang immediately pipes up, and Kun enters the room with a hot drink between his hands.

“You literally just dropped the expensive speaker you imported from abroad while packing.”

“But I didn’t break it!”

“That’s not reassuring.”

“Hi Haeun,” Renjun says softly, crossing his legs and looking down at Haeun’s chubby round face.

She’s got that clean, fresh baby smell, a comforting scent that only makes him want to hold her closer. A fondness surges in his chest, a kind of longing for someone as precious as this in his own life. If only he were moving in with Yangyang instead of the other way around—but then again, Haeun already has three dads. Moments with her will be precious and rare, no matter the circumstances.

Donghyuck must smell the slight shift in his scent, because he squeezes Renjun’s shoulders, then squats down next to him. “Careful, or you’ll trigger your heat early,” he says, quietly amused. Renjun only gets baby fever like this close to mating season.

“It would be worth it,” he responds, stroking her cheek gently, and Donghyuck whistles, low.

“He must really love you, baby,” Donghyuck says, holding out a hand to tickle under her chin. “If you go into heat early and trigger the rest of us, I’m telling Mark you don’t care about his exams.”

“If you go into heat early, that will be an interesting first week at the house,” Yangyang says, but Renjun can tell from his tone he’s worried. “Is it really okay for me to move in this weekend?”

He and Donghyuck exchange a look with each other, and Ten hums thoughtfully. “We know it’s not ideal timing for you guys. The social worker just told us this week that she’d be able to move in before the end of October, but we need to have the apartment ready by then.”

“It’s okay,” Renjun says. “We’ll be fine. It’s going to be worse for Yangyang than us, is the thing, because my heats are so bad.”

“Yangyang mentioned that,” Kun says, drink between his hands, watching Haeun in Renjun’s arms. “I can recommend some good suppressants.”

He sighs as Donghyuck squeezes his shoulders again. “I’ve tried lots of kinds of suppressants, but they all give me horrible side effects that make things worse. I have a pheremonal imbalance disorder that makes me kind of hard to deal with on my heat, but the others know how to handle me by now, so you shouldn’t need to do anything.”

“Aren’t I sharing a room with you?” Yangyang asks, and Renjun groans. He’d forgotten that little detail.

They have four bedrooms in their shared house—one that’s always been shared by Donghyuck and Jeno, and one that has nearly always been kept solo by Renjun. Mark, Chenle and Jaemin have long been flexible with where they sleep, and when Jisung joined their house, he shared with Renjun before branching out to sometimes share with Jaemin, sometimes taking Jaemin’s room alone. For a while, Chenle needed to sleep alone, too—it’s been a trial in making their sleeping arrangement work, but nothing was set in stone.

Until now. With four bedrooms and eight occupants, they needed to firm up permanent sleeping arrangements, and the plan was for Yangyang to be moving into Renjun’s room.

“Shit, you’re right.”

“You can share with me when you move in,” Donghyuck says. “Jeno can share with Mark. We’ll move you into Renjun’s room gradually.”

“Then what about Chenle?”

He and Donghyuck make long eye contact, Donghyuck’s mouth settling into an unsure line.

“What about Chenle?” Johnny prompts, leaning over to take Haeun back. When his arms are empty, Renjun feels disappointed and lonely, longing to hold her again.

“You know Chenle transitioned this year, right?” he says. “He came out as a beta in the spring, then went on blockers right away. We think he’s been on blockers long enough to stop his heat from happening, but there’s still a chance the rest of us going into heat and rut could trigger him. He hated it so much last year.”

“Chenle and Jisung can share a room,” Donghyuck chimes in. “Jisung has the best beta scent, anyway. It will be good for them. Jaemin can share with you, you don’t have any problems with him when you’re in heat.”

“All this kinda seems like I’m going to be a problem,” Yangyang says dubiously.

“It’s not a problem,” Renjun says, crossing his arms. He absolutely does not want to be the one holding up Kun, Ten and Johnny’s adoption when they’ve been waiting for so long already. “I swear, we’ll be absolutely fine having you in the house. It’s just a matter of you being prepared for my shitty heat symptoms.”

He can smell Donghyuck’s citrus scent mellowing out. His doubt is literally tangible in the air, and it makes him irrationally irritable.

“Your heat will be like, two days max, right?” Ten says. “It shouldn’t be too bad for that long.”

“It’s usually five days for me,” he sighs, long-suffering. “Plus two days of pre-heat.”

“Because of your disorder?” Kun asks.

“That, and I don’t have sex,” Renjun says, reaching up to fiddle with the fingers of Donghyuck’s hand. He pulls it from his shoulder, and Donghyuck comes to sit beside him, watching him. “So I don’t burn it out quickly like most people.”

“Because you’re ace?” Yangyang says in surprise. “I thought you do have sex sometimes, though? Isn’t it worth it to get through your heat?”

“It’s too painful on my heat. I’m already in a lot of pain, and it just makes it worse instead of making it better. That’s because of my disorder, but I also just have no desire for it.”

“You know, we can keep Yangyang for a few more weeks, until mating season is over,” Johnny says, voice light. “We can deal with him until then.”

“Hey!”

“No, we can take him,” Renjun says, firm. He allows himself a smile when he looks over at Yangyang. “This has been a long time coming, anyway. Jisung will be new to my heat too, so we might as well get over it with both of you at the same time.”

“It is better to get it over with,” Donghyuck says. “Jaemin was seriously considering calling an ambulance for him last year, it was that bad. The more hands on deck, the better, because I’m not allowed to help after the pre-heat period.”

“An ambulance?” Yangyang says, voice slightly pitched up. “I didn’t know that.”

“It’s just shit for a few days, then I’m okay again. Thank God it’s only once a year. I have new medication this time, too, so hopefully that will help me sleep through it all.”

Haeun gurgles from Johnny’s arms, and Renjun’s heart aches. Donghyuck laughs besides him at the jump in his scent, and Ten smiles too.

“We’d better go and pack, baby,” Donghyuck says, leaning in to kiss Renjun’s cheek. “Before you really set off your heat early.”

“I won’t, I’m fine,” he insists with a huff. “How horrible does your room look right now on a scale of one to ten?”

“Uh, eight,” Yangyang says, and Renjun sighs. At least he’s truthful. “I was halfway through my wardrobe when they got here with Haeun.”

“I’ll excuse the mess if it’s for Haeun.”

“Whipped,” Donghyuck says through a cough, and Renjun goes to grab him around the throat playfully.

Donghyuck leads them through to Yangyang’s bedroom, and as he does, Yangyang takes the opportunity to lean in and kiss Renjun softly.

“Thank you for letting me move in. And for trusting me to do it now.”

“I’ve wanted you to move in with us for months,” he admits, reaching out for Yangyang’s hand. “It’s not the best timing, but this is what pack is for. You’re going to fit right in with us.”

Yangyang beams, shoulders lifting, and Renjun feels warm where their hands are connected.

He truly believes that. They’ve got a few weeks before his heat is due, anyway. That’s plenty of time to adjust.

-

DAY 1

By Friday lunchtime, there’s no denying his pre-heat symptoms have hit. He’s been watching his cursor blink on the screen for an unknown length of time, eyes glazed over, trying to remember what he was typing. The glare is starting to hurt his eyes, and his unread emails tab feels like it’s burning a hole in his brain. He can’t remember what tasks he’s completed this morning, if any.

He digs the heels of his hands into his eyes, limbs feeling achy and his head thoroughly fuzzy. When he’s focused his vision enough to be able to find his cursor again, he opens up his emails and begins to draft one to his manager. Mating season leave that doesn’t align with your forecasted heat/rut period requires an updated forecast ahead of time, and his own leave is already double the length of everyone else’s. Making sure everyone is as updated as possible is the least he can do.

“Hey,” Jun says from next to him, wheeling his chair over to lean on his desk. “You’re legally allowed to go home early if your heat is triggered at an unexpected time.”

“You can smell it already?” he asks, fingers curling into his palm, casting a furtive glance around the office. Jaehyun from the next row is staring at him, but smoothly goes back to typing as if Renjun had never caught him. “Shit.”

“You’ve smelt off since this morning.”

“I can’t go home early,” Renjun mutters, renewed energy going into his typing. He makes four typos in a six-word sentence, and backtracks the whole thing with a groan. “I’m going to miss the meeting with the new client next week, and I’ve not prepared a handover of my accounts—I need to get ahead.”

“Minghao and Yizhuo will cover your work whether they like it or not. If you need to go home, you need to go.”

He stares down at his hands on the keyboard. The swooping gut nerves that precede his heats are coming out in full force—he can’t help but worry that he’s going to be a pain to everyone around him. He’s terrified, knowing that the horrible symptoms and terrible days are coming around again, like they have every year since he was seventeen.

“I know that people will talk,” he says quietly, slowly typing the words this time. Why is even this difficult? “No one else in the office takes five days off for mating season. I needed to hand in a doctor’s note for this, and I still thought management wouldn’t accept it. People will make assumptions.”

“Then let them talk,” Jun says, and Renjun wishes he could have that ease. “If they’re going to gossip, they’re not worth your stress and time. If they’re the type who talk, then they’re going to talk regardless of how much work you do ahead. Think about yourself, not how people you barely know perceive you.”

He finally looks over Jun’s way. When he’d spilt to his deskmate about his chronic illness at a work social three months ago, he’d berated himself for a whole weekend about it—who needs to know? Why did he get that personal after two shots? Before he knows it, his whole personal life will have been passed around the office, and for what?

But he’s grateful for it now. Jun has only become a closer work friend, and has been the sweetest support in the run up to mating season. This will be his first one since starting this job, and he’s seriously afraid that a whole week of medical leave over his heat is going to damage his office reputation irreparably. But he trusts that Jun, at least, will still have his back when he returns.

“Go home,” Jun says gently. Renjun fervently pulls up the spreadsheets he was working on, and finds he can’t focus enough to read the words in the boxes. As he does another glance around the office, he sees Yuta and Jungwoo staring his way this time.

Jun is right. Better to make himself scarce than to cause a scene. He goes back to the email with to his manager, barely skimming it before hitting send.

“I’ll see you in a week’s time,” he says, closing his laptop and hoisting it into his backpack. Maybe he can finish some things off at home so it’s not a complete mess of a handover. “Thank you.”

“Take care of yourself,” Jun says, smiling at him. “I’ll hold down the fort while you’re gone!”

“Let’s hope I still have a workplace to come back to, then,” he says, and laughs when Jun playfully swipes at him.

-

By the time he arrives home, he’s glad he’d left early. His stomach is starting to roll with untimely hunger for something full of sugar and cocoa, and by the way Jeno glances up at him when he enters the house, he can tell his scent is changing for the worse.

“Don’t say I told you so,” he snaps, even though Mark had been the one to question if he was going into pre-heat that morning. He hadn’t even seen Jeno before work today.

He enters the kitchen and roots around their sweets shelf for something good. The only thing there is a packet of yugwa and one remaining chocopie, so he takes both from the shelf and clutches them to his chest. He stands there, takes a deep breath in, and shuffles back into the living room.

Jeno is still peering over the back of the couch, expression slightly wounded, warm rocky scent dampening.

“Sorry,” he says shortly, and Jeno doesn’t need more of an explanation than that.

“S’okay,” he says, albeit cautiously. “You want to come and sit?”

He wanders over to the couch. He’s not really sure if he does want to, but when he rounds it, he realises Jeno is in his work uniform. “Have you been on shift, or are you going out?”

“Leaving in twenty,” he responds, and that makes Renjun’s mind up for him. He drops himself into the seat beside Jeno and kicks his feet up into his lap, offering him the yugwa packet by way of apology.

Jeno takes one and bites it. “What do you think brought it on early?” he asks carefully, and Renjun aggressively rips open the chocopie packet.

“Saw Haeun last night,” he answers shortly, taking a bite. “She was just too cute.”

“Ah,” Jeno says, still careful, and Renjun feels guilty. Jeno is easily the most kicked puppy of all his boyfriends. “And Yangyang is still moving in tomorrow…?”

“It can’t be any later than tomorrow. It’ll be fine.”

“Don’t push it if you’re not sure. They’ll still adopt Haeun, whether it’s this month or next month.”

“It’s fine,” he snaps again, then bites the inside of his mouth. “We’ll be fine.”

“Okay,” Jeno backs down immediately, going to move off the couch. Renjun shoves the last of the chocopie in his mouth and surges forward before he can, wrapping his arms around Jeno’s middle.

“Don’t go yet,” he says around the food, hugging him tight. Jeno relents, leaning into him too. “Sorry I’m moody.”

“I know why. Not your fault.”

“Still shitty.”

“Yeah.” Jeno hugs him a little tighter, and Renjun feels forgiven. “I do have to go to work, though.”

“No one else is home?”

“Not right now,” he says, shifty, and Renjun sighs. Jeno is terrible at hiding things.

“Who did you text?” he grumbles. He’d caught on last year that his boyfriends keep a schedule around him on his heat, so that he’s never home alone. It’s as endearing as it is infuriating.

“Chenle doesn’t have any classes today, he just went to campus to study with Jisung. He’ll be here five minutes after I leave.”

“It’s just pre-heat,” he grumbles again, releasing Jeno to lie out on the sofa, despondent. “I’m not dying.”

“No, but it’s not fun to be alone either,” Jeno says, and moves away to grab his things. “Don’t be mad.”

“I’m not mad. Pass me my rucksack?”

Jeno dutifully passes it over the couch before he gets his stuff together, kisses Renjun goodbye, and heads out to work. His fingers absent-mindedly stroke his scent glands before leaving, as if trying to soothe his agitation. Renjun finds it in himself to wish Jeno a good shift, before resigning himself to the fact that he is now the resident Household Problem for the next seven days.

He opens up his work laptop, trying to pick up from where he left off. All he sees is that Jun has sent him a gif of a capybara dancing in their Teams private chat. Against the backdrop of his half-finished work and several unread messages from colleagues and his manager, he laughs to himself, watching the pixelated capybara hop from one foot to another. He laughs about it a little too hard—maybe to procrastinate doing his work. The more he thinks about it, the funnier it is.

He’s wiping half-hysterical tears from his eyes when Chenle opens the front door. “What’s so funny?”

Renjun’s good humour drops off immediately as he remembers he’s The Household Problem. Chenle’s sweet cocoa scent feels suddenly overwhelming. “What are you doing here?”

“You know exactly what I’m doing here,” Chenle shoots back. “Don’t be a baby about it.”

“A baby,” Renjun sighs wistfully, opening up his kakao messages with Yangyang.

Do you have any new Haeun pics

Also my pre-heat hit lol. Come early tomrw

Or else

Chenle is laughing at him as he unpacks his tablet and textbooks onto the living room table. “You’re that bad already?”

“I’m fine,” Renjun bites, tapping his phone screen impatiently. Yangyang is at work, and probably won’t reply until later, so he throws it somewhere on the couch and looks back at his laptop screen.

Chenle comes to sit next to him, and Renjun startles. “You’re sitting next to me?”

“What?” Chenle shoots a look at him. “Can I not sit next to you?”

“Do you want to risk it?”

The look he gets is withering. “Don’t worry about that. I’m in a pack house with two omegas and two alphas. If I’m getting triggered this mating season, I’m just getting triggered. Sitting with you or not won’t change that.”

Renjun pulls a face of his own, but he can’t challenge that logic. “I have to finish my work,” he says instead. “Go back to your studies.”

“Fine,” Chenle says easily, and goes.

Getting his work wrapped up is a slog, with no more excuses or distractions to put it off with. It’s truly hard to find his thread of thoughts when faced with the dozens of windows he has open, and he has to make a shortlist to work through one by one. He sends emails around making sure everyone has what they need, apologising profusely for having to bring forward his heat leave, and finally logs off a few hours later, eyes burning and head spinning.

Finally, he has the freedom to wander into the kitchen and find the delicious smell that’s been distracting him for the past twenty minutes. Chenle is stood at the stove, cooking up a pot of malatang. A new hunger rolls through his belly, for some real food—Chenle always makes stuff that smells like home.

“Is this for me?” he asks, moving up behind Chenle and wrapping his arms around his waist. He usually wouldn’t be caught dead doing this, but it’s the home smell—it’s especially soothing right now, makes him want to hold onto someone comfortable and go to sleep.

“No, it’s all for me,” Chenle sing-songs, and Renjun playfully bites his shoulder.

“I want some.”

“Go and change your clothes, first,” Chenle says, drawing out the words. Renjun lingers for a few moments before drifting through the house to his bedroom, not wanting to follow orders, but too lazy to fight it too hard.

When he reappears, Chenle is plating up the food, two seats opposite each other. “We need to talk about rooms before you get too heat-stupid.”

They’d spoken about it briefly the day before, when he and Donghyuck had arrived back from Yangyang’s place. Jeno and Jaemin hadn’t been there at the time, but they’re two of the most agreeable members of the pack, so Renjun hadn’t been too worried.

“What about it? You’re not going to tell me Yangyang can’t move in too, right?”

“I do think moving him in early has triggered your heat. That combined with all the baby talk. But there’s no point in stopping him now if you’re already triggered. You might as well get it all over with.”

“Right,” he says, a little emboldened that Chenle actually agrees with him. “So what about the rooms?”

“Jisung needs reassuring it’s only temporary. He’s fine with doing it for a week, but I don’t think he wants to be with me permanently.”

“Of course. He’ll go with Jaemin, like we planned, once mating season is over.”

“I know. I’m just telling you to reassure him. You know he gets nervous. Speaking of nervous, someone needs to run it by Jeno tonight, too. You know he can get anxious about random things, and sharing with Mark might be one of those things, you know? He used to have such a complex about him.”

He’s irritated by the implication that he hadn’t considered Jeno’s anxiety, mostly because he actually hadn’t. “We’ll talk about it tonight. It’s not like I planned for my heat to come on this quick. I haven’t had a chance to go over it with everyone individually.”

“I know,” Chenle says, eyebrows raised. “Not blaming you. Just keeping you in the loop.”

He picks up his spoon to scoop up some of the soup, sighing when he tastes it. Chenle is too good at cooking malatang. “Sorry. I know.”

“Good.”

“Thanks for the food.”

“Anytime.”

They eat for a little while in companionable silence, and Renjun lets his mind work over everything happening. Doubt is starting to creep in—is it right to move Yangyang in? He’s sure that it won’t make too much of a difference now, like Chenle says. His heat has been triggered, and having Yangyang here is better than having him somewhere else.

The thing he’s most worried about is whether it will be too much for Yangyang, experiencing this for the first time the same week he moves in with the pack. For Jisung too, who has never experienced Renjun’s heat. Then there’s Chenle to think about, who is the most unpredictable this mating season.

Is it all too much?

“Are you okay with the rooms too?” he frowns, to get around what he really wants to ask.

“Of course. Jisung is a good roommate,” Chenle says, eyeing him up. “What is it?”

Renjun curls his fingers. “Do you think we need a contingency plan, for if your heat is triggered by mine?”

Chenle shrugs. “My plan was to lock myself in the room and ignore everyone until it’s over. We have the pull-out beds in the living room if people need to be put out of rooms, right? That goes for Jaemin too, if you need to kick him out. You know, prioritise yourself in your heat, and all that. It’s a last resort, but still an option.”

“I suppose,” he mumbles, and Chenle leans over the table to poke his cheek. Renjun turns away irritably.

“Don’t be so long-faced about it. I told you, if my heat is triggered this mating season, it’s just gonna happen. Not your fault. Let’s believe in the power of modern medicine for now.”

“Mmh,” he sighs. He’s eaten half his bowl of malatang, but he’s suddenly not feeling like eating the rest.

There are a few new messages in their group chat, with the most recent telling him that Jisung is coming home soon. He has new notifications from Yangyang, too.

Ok I will be there EARLY early. 11am?

You feeling ok?

Here’s Haeun for you

The photo attachments come through blurred, and take a few moments to sharpen up. When they do, he’s met with a photo of baby Haeun staring, wide-eyed, up at Kun. Kun is smiling down at her, eyes full of love.

The next picture shows her sleeping in Johnny’s arms, bundled up in blankets. The soft hair on her head is standing up, making it look flyaway. In the next, Ten is kissing her cheek, and she looks surprised, her mouth in a round O shape.

Renjun pouts, looking down at that picture of Haeun. He wants to hold her so badly.

In the last one, she’s grinning right at the camera, eyes alight and toothless little mouth turned up. She seems mid-giggle, cheeks pink, someone’s fingertips just in the corner of the shot.

He pouts harder, throat closing up. This is ridiculous. She’s so cute, and he wants to hold her so badly. Tears prickle at his eyes, and he lets himself hiccup before they start streaming out.

“What is it?” Chenle says, voice pitching up. “What, what’s wrong?”

“Look,” he whines, turning the phone screen to Chenle. His expression brightens, cooing at the photo of Haeun.

“She’s adorable!” he smiles, cupping his chin in his hand. “Such a cutie.”

“I know,” he huffs, wiping the tears from his cheeks.

“Oh, baby,” Chenle smiles, rising from his seat. “There, there.”

He comes to Renjun’s side, and Renjun stands, going into a hug with Chenle. His hands rub gently up and down Renjun’s back, and it’s soothing, even if Renjun can feel Chenle’s smile pressed into his shoulder.

“Let’s put a movie on,” he says, coming out of the hug after a minute or two to take Renjun by the hand. He leads him over to the couch, and Renjun wipes at stinging eyes, feeling warm and tired. “You know you like that on your heat. I’ll tidy up, you can get under your blanket.”

“Yes,” he says pathetically. He would like his blanket. “Where is everyone else? Jisung should be back by now.”

“He’ll be back in ten. Let’s put the movie on, and you can cuddle with him when he gets here.”

He lets himself be deposited on the sofa, work laptop moved out of his sight, blanket passed his way. He spends ten minutes lazily scrolling through Netflix until he lands on Avatar—it’s a comfort movie—and Jisung comes through the door. Chenle has just finished clearing away the dishes, and Renjun complains loudly until they come to sit either side of him.

“Where’s everyone else?” he asks again, glaring at their group chat.

“They’ll be back soon,” Chenle says, taking the remote from him to turn on the movie. “Settle down, old man.”

Renjun kicks him, then goes to cuddle up to Jisung, who takes him in his arms. Renjun breathes in his comforting laundry scent, all fresh air and clear skies. “How was your day, baby?”

“Seems like it was better than yours.”

“Probably. You want to watch this?”

“If it’s what you want,” Jisung says diplomatically, and Chenle sniggers.

“How long will you stay awake for it?”

“Shut up, Chenle, I can stay up,” he insists, even as he’s getting comfortable with his legs in Chenle’s lap, side-snuggled up to Jisung. The opening sequence begins playing out, someone has dimmed the lights, and Jisung produces some of the strawberry sweets he likes from nowhere. He feels incredibly comfortable and warm…

-

He half-wakes up later to a few people talking quietly in the living room, movie still playing out vaguely somewhere in front of him, room darker than before.

“He’s so cute like this,” Mark is saying, a smile in his voice. “He been okay?”

“This is the easy bit,” Chenle says. “It was alright.”

“I’m fine,” he grumbles, burrowing deeper into whatever he’s lying on. Someone’s leg. Jisung?

“You wanna come to bed?” Jaemin’s gentle, singy voice says, closer to him than Mark is. He couldn’t even smell him in the room, buried under the blanket that smells like Chenle. “Get some sleep?”

“M’watching movie,” he slurs, and doesn’t complain when someone coos and pats his hair.

“Okay. After the movie?”

“Mmh,” he says, clutching the blanket in his hand. His pack continue talking from there, but he zones out again, and falls back asleep.

-

DAY 2

He wakes up in his own bed, which smells of Jaemin, but has no Jaemin in it. It’s early, but he must’ve slept a long time, judging by how heavy his limbs feel. He wishes he’d slept longer.

Sunlight is peeking in golden through the window, like it’s just risen. Why is Jaemin out of bed? He wants him here. Most of the time he couldn’t care less about waking up alone, but right now he just wants someone to cling to.

The shark plushie Yangyang had given him when back they’d started courting has fallen onto the floor. He locks eyes with it, then reaches out a hand as if to grab it. But the floor is so far away, and he feels drowsy. He wants to sleep again.

The door opens, and he lolls his head to see Jaemin coming back in.

“Where?” he says, too tired to finish the sentence.

“Toilet,” Jaemin responds, smile on his face, voice quiet and gentle. “Why are you awake?”

Renjun just sighs. “Shark?” He makes grabby hands in the direction of the shark, and Jaemin grins further when he spots it.

“You want this?” he asks, picking it up and placing it into Renjun’s arms.

“Yes,” he mumbles, burying into the sheets with the shark firmly in his grasp. “Cuddle?”

“Sure, cuddle,” Jaemin says, so fond and endeared. He climbs into the bed and spoons him from behind, wrapping his arms around him until he’s holding the shark in his grip too, stroking it softly. Betas typically know how to soothe, but he’s sure Jaemin’s nurturing ability goes beyond biology. This is something Jaemin loves to do in a way other betas often simply get saddled with. “You want anything else?”

“No,” he says, taking an inhale of the scented toy. It reminds him of Yangyang—which reminds him that he’s supposed to be moving in this morning—which reminds him…

“Jeno,” he sighs. “And Jisung. Chenle said…” he sighs again. “Talk to them.”

“About the rooms?” Jaemin asks, and Renjun is grateful Jaemin is so plugged in to pack dynamics. Trying to have this conversation with pretty much anyone else wouldn’t be so easy. This is why Jaemin was picked for Renjun’s heat roommate duty. “Chenle thought you might be worried. We talked with Jeno about it last night, he’s okay with it.”

“Will see Jisung,” he says, half to himself. It’s Saturday today—he’s pretty sure—and it’ll be all hands on deck to get Yangyang moved in quickly and painlessly. Jisung will be around.

“Sure you will,” Jaemin says soothingly. “Go back to sleep, baby.”

“You…” he huffs, cracking an eye open. They flutter closed easily—he still feels drowsy and heavy, especially with Jaemin’s comforting weight on him. “Can you scent me? Before I smell bad?”

“Of course,” Jaemin says, coming in close to his scent glands and sighing, satisfied by the press of the two of them together, careful nuzzles to his neck and face. “Don’t worry about your scent, will you? We don’t mind it. Promise.”

They’d had an argument about this after his heat last year—Jaemin had been the most insistent that he shouldn’t fret so much about his scent, but Jaemin isn’t exactly who he’s so worried about. The beta sense of smell can’t compare to an omega or alpha’s, especially one in heat or rut.

He knows he smells bad in heat. Not just bad—rancid. His body is in overdrive for the whole period of his heat, doesn’t know how to regulate itself. He’s in so much pain and emotional distress that it’s frankly unpleasant to be in a house with him, never mind sharing a bed. It’s something that makes him feel horribly guilty and self-conscious over the period of his heat, which became incredibly obvious to the rest of his pack last year.

“Mmh,” he says, noncommittal, but relaxes into Jaemin’s hold.

-

He wakes up again to distant sounds in the house—voices, movement, a conversation down the hallway.

Jaemin is still there, which is unusual. He usually goes to the gym with Jeno on a Saturday morning. The sinking feeling in his gut is telling him that Jaemin changed his plans because Renjun had been so needy earlier this morning.

He pushes himself into sitting up, stomach growling. His back aches, and sitting up puts more pressure on it, but he was starting to feel stifled and hot under the sheets.

“Morning, love,” Jaemin murmurs, half-awake. “You okay?”

“Fine,” he says, frowning, trying to listen. Yangyang’s voice is down the hall, too low to make out what he’s saying, but Donghyuck’s higher voice is clearly directing him into the room he usually shares with Jeno. Jeno is out there too—he can’t hear him, but his scent is too strong for him not to be there. He must be moving his bits out as Yangyang moves his in.

He’s ruined everyone’s routines with this. Maybe he should’ve told Yangyang not to come yet.

“You want something to eat?” Jaemin says, sitting up beside him. Remembering Jaemin is here makes him feel more irritable, and he doesn’t answer, but gets up to go to the bathroom.

The malatang from last night doesn’t come out without a fight, and he sits on the toilet with his head in his hands, trying to ignore the pain in his stomach. When he comes back out, Jaemin has vacated the bedroom, which is what Renjun deserves. He lingers at the doorway, waiting to see who will come by.

Yangyang comes in through their front door with a suitcase, and spots Renjun standing around nervously on his own.

“Hey, baby,” he says, parking the suitcase to come over and hug him. Renjun kind of wants to stop him, because he’ll smell Renjun if he gets too close, but finds he’s more relieved than he realised to see him here. He embraces him, and breathes in his sea air scent, letting it calm him.

“Hey,” he says, trying not to sound too miserable. “Can I help?”

“No, it’s okay,” Yangyang says, patting his hip. “We got it. Everyone’s helping me out, you just rest. You doing okay?”

“Yeah,” he shrugs. “If you see Jisung, can you send him my way?”

“Sure.” He kisses Renjun on the mouth. “Love you. I’m excited to move in.”

That settles some of his nerves at least. This must be the right thing to do. “I’m glad.” He kisses him again, then lets him go.

The room feels lonely without Jaemin there, and he feels guiltier than before for giving him the cold shoulder. He crawls back into bed and clutches the shark, but it doesn’t give him the same comfort it had this morning.

It doesn’t last long. The boyfriend in question reappears after a few minutes of lying in misery, holding a hot cocoa and a bowl of sliced fruit.

“You want?” Jaemin asks, as gentle as ever.

Renjun swallows down guilt. “Yes,” he says, taking the bowl from him as Jaemin puts the mug on the side table. “Thank you.”

“No problem.” From the pocket of his hoodie, he presents a heat pack, and cracks it. Then he sits next to Renjun on the bed, pressing it against the small of his back.

Renjun squints at him. He doesn’t have his glasses on, and can’t understand how Jaemin has just the thing he needs in his hands. “How did you know?”

“You were holding your back,” he answers, as if it’s nothing.

“Sorry,” Renjun says, near a whisper, swallowing back tears as he focuses on his fruit. He hopes Jaemin knows he means for being blunt earlier—he hates how he gets on his heat. Hates it more than anything.

“Forgiven,” Jaemin says simply, resting his cheek against Renjun’s shoulder so that he’s not watching him closely, but still near enough to hold the heat pack in place.

Sitting there and listening to the sounds of Yangyang moving in makes him realise Jaemin has nothing in here that’s his. He must’ve come to bed last night without moving any of his own things over—Jisung’s things still half-clutter the room, the other half of them in Jaemin’s usual room. He wishes he had some sense of Jaemin living here, too.

It’s probably just the first of his nesting urges raising their head. He squashes the feelings down for now. Nesting embarrasses him like nothing else.

Jisung peers in around the door when he finishes the fruit and is simply sitting there, letting Jaemin hold him. It feels too hard to find something else to do right now, and he’d forgotten he was looking for Jisung until he appeared.

“Hey,” he says, reaching for him like he’s the shark plushie, just out of reach. Jisung comes to sit on the bed with him and holds his hand, smelling a little nervous, but looking sleepy and soft.

“Morning,” he says, voice low, and Renjun wants to pull him into his chest and hold him there. “Were you looking for me?”

“I just wanted to make sure you’re okay with sleeping in Chenle’s room this week. Did you sleep there last night?”

“I did,” he murmurs. “It was okay. Chenle was excited.”

“He let you get some sleep, right?”

“Yeah,” Jisung smiles, and Renjun can tell he liked it, even if he didn’t get as much sleep as he would usually. “It was fun. It’s just over your heat, right?”

“Only for this week, then you’ll be back with Jaemin. Or maybe with me, if Yangyang likes Donghyuck’s company that much.”

“It would be nice to swap sometimes,” Jisung says, and Renjun hums his agreement.

“I’m sure we’ll figure it out.”

“Are you doing okay today?”

Renjun tilts his head, and Jisung points towards where Jaemin is holding the heat pack to Renjun’s back. He’s had his chin on Renjun’s shoulder for the whole conversation, smiling vaguely and watching them talk.

“I’m okay. It’s still just preheat, which isn’t so bad.”

Jisung nods, scent flaring again, the sign he’s about to say something which makes him nervous. “Do you, um, want to play Animal Crossing?”

His heart melts. “I’d love to play Animal Crossing with you. Could you get Jeno’s Switch for me?”

Jisung agrees and scampers away, and Renjun makes himself comfortable up against the headboard with Jaemin.

“He’s the cutest, isn’t he?” Jaemin asks fondly. “Our Jisung.”

“I love him so much,” Renjun says miserably. “Are you staying here? You can go to the gym if you want to. You don’t have to take shifts on me.”

“There’s too much going on here to leave this morning. Jeno and I will go tonight, before his rut is triggered.”

Jisung comes back in with Jeno’s switch and Donghyuck’s switch, which each became communal a month after they were respectively purchased, and places Jeno’s in his hands.

“We could play something else if you want to join us, Hyung?”

“No no, I like watching,” Jaemin says, reaching out to pinch Jisung’s cheek briefly between two fingers. “I’ll enjoy if you enjoy it.”

“You are weird,” Jisung tells him, and Jaemin lights up like he’d confessed his love.

“And you’re cute,” he retorts, and Renjun loads up his game, sighing from where he’s pressed between the two of them.

“But then again, so is our Renjun-ie,” Jaemin coos, going to pat his cheek too, and Renjun is tempted to snap at his fingers with his teeth. He sends him a little glare instead, hunching into himself to tap on the screen.

Jisung squeezes his leg, and that makes Renjun ease up. It doesn’t take long for him to zone out of the noises in the house and into his game, nurturing his flowers and visiting Jisung’s island to pick fruit.

Around midday he starts craving pasta, so Jaemin agreeably goes to make it for him. Yangyang shows up to announce that he’s all moved in, and Renjun pulls him down to cuddle for a good twenty minutes, attention well and truly strayed from Animal Crossing.

“Kun and co. wanted to come and help me move in, but they didn’t want to disturb you in pre-heat. But they say hi, and bye, and stuff.”

“They could’ve come in,” he grouches. “It’s not like they’re strangers.”

“But they’re not pack,” Jisung says, frowning at his screen. “Yangyang-hyung still moved in really fast with everyone helping.”

“He’s right,” Yangyang says, vague satisfaction in his voice. Yangyang’s pack status has been a little tentative for a while now—moving in is more or less the last step before it’s official, so it’s probably strange and a little exciting for him to hear himself referred to as pack. “It wasn’t a problem, or anything. I just wanted to pass on their message.”

“You already know where everything is in the house,” he sighs, and Yangyang laughs a little.

“Yes? Why, is that a bad thing?”

“It means I can’t give you a house tour. I wanna do something for you moving in. I’ve just been lying here, missing it all.”

“I mean, you can still show me around if you want to. It’s not gonna hurt.”

“There’s no point,” he whines, burrowing his face into Yangyang’s shirt.

He feels the other two share a look over his head, and is reminded he’s left with his two boyfriends who have never experienced his heat before, the way his moods swing and his desires wane.

Yangyang adapts quickly. “Then let’s go out after your heat, make it a celebration.”

“Okay,” he mumbles, but it’s hard to see a fun time past his heat right now. And it hasn’t even really begun yet.

Jaemin re-enters with the pasta at that moment, but he doesn’t really want it anymore. He takes it from him, thanks him, and pokes around at it with the fork whilst silently hoping Jaemin will leave the room.

Thankfully, he gets drawn into a conversation with Yangyang and Jisung about how betas now make up half their pack, and how they should form a union, or something. Renjun takes the distraction to slip the bowl of pasta under the bed and out of sight.

He sets up a sheet of canvas paper on his desk and ignores them as he begins to paint for the afternoon. He rarely gets time for things like this, so he might as well take the opportunity of a week stuck in the house to vent his creativity out.

Yangyang wanders out soon after, being called upon by Donghyuck for something, and Jaemin also gives him his space. Jisung stays, still playing on his Switch on Renjun’s bed, but his fresh sheets scent is incredibly comforting to him, so Renjun doesn’t mind.

He wanders back over to the bed late afternoon, nosing Jisung’s neck and wrapping an arm around him.

“Jisung,” he starts, and Jisung lowers his game to pay attention to him. “Do we have any ramen in the house?”

“We must. Donghyuck lives here.” Jisung looks around, belatedly realising what he’s asking. “You want me to go and get you some?”

“Please,” he says, mumbled into Jisung’s soft hoodie. He doesn’t really want him to go, but he’s starting to get hungry, the kind of craving only instant food or fast food can fix.

“Don’t you like leaving your room when you’re in heat? I haven’t seen you out of it all day.”

He shakes his head, pausing a moment before answering. “I know I smell really bad on my heat. I don’t want it to get around the house too much and bother everyone else.”

“I’m sure they wouldn’t mind, Hyung. You have to leave for some things.”

He hums, unconvinced, but Jisung is already getting up to head for the kitchen.

Jisung can’t be gone for long, but time is moving strangely, in the way it does when you haven’t done anything all day. He seems to take forever, and also no time at all. But he does eventually reappear with an extra large sized ramen cup, and Renjun pulls him down to kiss him before taking it.

He eats it all this time, and Jisung offers to get rid of the untouched pasta evidence and bring back Renjun some water when he’s done. Renjun finds himself a little overwhelmed with love, even if he’s not convinced the pasta disposal will go unnoticed.

Mark slips in after Jisung slips out, in the last eventful visit of the day.

“Hey, baby,” he coos, and Renjun, who had been sleepily scrolling on his phone, squints up at him.

“Hey,” he says, feeling guilty he can’t provide a warm welcome. He’s way too close to his heat to feel happy about much at the moment. “Don’t cuddle me, I smell bad.”

“Too bad, I wanna cuddle you,” Mark says, climbing onto the bed beside him. “Can I? Please? I missed you this week.”

“You’ve been too busy,” he complains, pulling Mark down beside him, holding his arms. He doesn’t want him close to his scent glands, but he kind of does want to hold him. “I’ve barely seen you.”

“I know, it’s my exams. I’ve been studying so much for them, I didn’t even clock Yangyang was moving in until this morning.”

Renjun feels his mood dropping even further. He’d completely forgotten about Mark’s exams next week—the whole reason Donghyuck had told him not to hold Haeun in the first place.

“I’m so sorry, Hyung, you’re going to be triggered by the time you start them, aren’t you? Shit, your exams…”

“It’s okay,” Mark says, running a soothing hand down the back of Renjun’s neck. “Really. I started taking some suppressants today, so my symptoms shouldn’t be bad when they kick in. I’ll be fine.”

“I’m sorry,” he repeats, miserable. “I completely forgot. I’m a horrible mate.”

“No, you’re not. Don’t say that about yourself. I came in here to hug you and make you feel better, not worse.”

“I don’t know why you bother. I wouldn’t blame you if you just left me here.”

“I’m never going to do that, baby,” he says softly, leaning over to kiss Renjun’s forehead. “I don’t care how you smell, or how moody you are, or, like, whatever. I just wanna make sure you’re okay. Don’t worry about the rest of us for the next few days, okay? We just want you to be okay.”

He can feel himself getting sleepier, where he didn’t feel sleepy at all before—Mark must be pushing out comforting pheromones right now, whether he knows it or not. Instead of making him feel calm, they make him feel drowsy and dizzy.

“I’m too much of a burden to the pack in heat,” he mumbles. “I can deal with it on my own. It doesn’t have to be everyone else’s problem.”

“We are never going to let you suffer on your own,” Mark tells him, as if it should be obvious. “I know everything feels terrible right now, but I promise you, we love you just as much now as when you’re perfectly healthy and in your right mind. Of course we wanna look after you, baby. It’s for us as much as you—I like knowing you’re as comfortable as you can be. Plus, that’s why there’s so many of us, right? Even if just one person is with you, that person represents all of us. But the household can still function like normal. You’re not stopping us from living our lives, too.”

“Not even your exams?” he mumbles.

“Not even my exams,” Mark says, smile in his voice. “I’m gonna ace them.”

“You better,” he says, voice small and quiet as drops off to sleep.

-

Jaemin wakes him up in the middle of the night, and he can barely drag himself out of sleep enough to work out what he’s saying. The feeling dawns on him slowly—he’d forgotten to put a slick pad on before sleep, and now his sheets and sleep shorts are sticky and uncomfortable.

He’s directed to the bathroom to clean himself up as Jaemin changes the sheets. He hates the feeling of being messy, especially since Jaemin must’ve felt his mess to have woken him up. After carefully applying a pad to some new underwear, he shuffles back into the bedroom with his head hung.

Jaemin doesn’t complain for a moment of it, but guides Renjun back into a bed made up of clean, fresh sheets. He mourns the loss of the previous sheets, which smelt like half his pack from the visits the previous day, and cries a little for reasons he can’t really name.

He sleeps quickly again at least, crushing the shark between his arms as Jaemin cuddles him from behind, soothingly stroking the soft skin of his hand.

-

DAY 3

He wakes up with startling clarity, the way only fear or shock can do. It’s the mess in his underwear that’s roused him, and he does a quick shuffle to make sure the pad is still on, and he didn’t just dream up changing it in the night. It’s still there, but it could do with a change, so he gets up from the bed and heads for the bathroom.

Jaemin has roused when he returns, rubbing his eyes and stretching. “You okay?” he says, and Renjun comes to sit on the edge of the bed.

Other than the tension in his stomach, he does, technically, feel okay. But something is off. His environment feels unsettling and cold, though nothing has changed in the bedroom since last night.

He knows what the urge is.

“What day is it?” he asks.

“Sunday,” Jaemin says, voice soft with sleep. “Why?”

He grits his teeth. Nesting is best when there’s no one around to disturb him, or accidentally walk in when he’s not finished. When no one is around to see the way he works through their clothes and loved belongings, feeling like a stray cat scavenging for food, picking out just the right thing he needs for the nest.

If it’s Sunday, chances are no one is leaving the house. Mark or Chenle might have had plans to see friends, but neither will risk it now, when they could be triggered by Renjun’s heat at any moment. If Jeno is on shift, he might be expected to turn up to work until his actual rut hits, but that’s only one out of seven of his boyfriends giving him space.

As much as he loves them, he hates being, as Chenle put it, ‘heat-stupid’ around them. And nesting must be one of the most stupid things a young male omega is prone to do. An asexual one, at that, in a pack that is certainly not ready to have children.

“Renjun?” Jaemin says, and Renjun remembers himself.

“Can I have the room today?” he asks. It’s not unlikely Jaemin would go back to sleep now if Renjun let him, but he knows how long Jaemin can sleep in for. He’s only going to work himself up if he can’t fix the room now, and he needs Jaemin out of it first.

“Uh-huh,” Jaemin says, groaning and stretching. “Sure. Now?”

“Yeah,” he says, sagging. “You’re not gonna ask why?”

“I remember from last year,” Jaemin says, standing sleepily and traipsing from the room. “Have fun.”

“If you go to Mark’s room, he has the biggest bed, you’ll fit in between him and Jeno,” he says, in a rush. “And if Jeno’s awake, can you ask him if he has a shift today?”

Jaemin pauses at the door, still half-asleep, but smiling at him from under his eyelashes all the same. “I’ll be okay,” he says gently. “And I’ll ask Jeno.”

“Thanks,” he says quietly. Jaemin shuts the door behind him.

When he does, Renjun stands from the bed immediately. He needs to rearrange the wardrobe right now. It’s not right.

The household wakes up around him as he works on the contents of his wardrobe, drawers, and under-bed storage. He hears Mark get up and make himself a protein shake in the kitchen, then comes Jisung wandering around the house, getting a shower and making himself breakfast. Chenle’s voice, which carries above just about everything, can be heard speaking to each of them as he passes through with his own morning routine.

As more of them wake, his tension grows. He would bet that Jaemin has issued the warning not to disturb him, but that just means they’ll be expectant. He has to make a good nest for them as well as himself. Plus, this will be Yangyang and Jisung’s first experience not just with him nesting, but with any nesting omega.

Will they get it? Will they like it? If Yangyang so much as mentions Haeun, he’s at real risk of bursting into tears. He misses her.

By the time he reaches the bed, he knows he’s at his limit. He can fold the sheets just as he likes, plump up the pillows and set them with the extra cushions, but it’s just too empty. He needs the others here with him.

There’s an unopened message on his phone from Jeno that tells him when his shifts are this week. He is working today, and leaves in a few hours.

Renjun had better start with him.

Concerns about leaving his room are thrown out the window, and he navigates the house to Mark’s room, flitting by Jaemin in the kitchen.

Jeno is lying in bed on his phone. He’s shirtless, much to Renjun’s annoyance.

“Why aren’t you wearing anything?” he says, looking around. Jeno had brought through a bag of clothes, but hasn’t unpacked them yet—a few of his things litter the side table, but he must have left a lot of his belongings in his shared room with Donghyuck.

“What?” Jeno says, head up. “Sorry?”

“I need something,” he says, almost feverish. He doesn’t want to clarify what, but Jeno seems to know. “Do you have any—what did you wear yesterday?”

Jeno points to a hoodie on the floor by Renjun’s feet. He feels like crying. This can’t be all he has.

“What else?” he asks, agitated, picking up the hoodie. It does smell like him, but Jeno’s scent isn’t a powerful one, and he needs something else with it.

“I’ve still got the sweatpants on,” he says, pushing aside the bedsheets and kicking a leg up to show him.

“I need them,” he says, stepping forward to take the waistband and pull them off him, leaving him in just his underwear.

“Uh,” Jeno says, and Renjun can’t look at him.

“Is that okay?” he says, looking down at the sweatpants in hand. He can give them back if his alpha needs them. If Jeno needs them. Fuck.

“No, it’s okay. I think you need them more than me.”

He stands there for a moment, indecisive. Part of him feels delighted to have this—this is what he needs. This smells like Jeno.

Another part of him is mortified. They’ll never let him live this down.

“When will you be back from shift?” he asks instead.

“Late. Midnight, maybe.”

He wars with himself again before surging towards the bed. His heat is well and truly here—he noses at Jeno’s neck, scenting him before he goes out. “I’m gonna miss you.”

“No you won’t,” Jeno says softly, though there’s a pleased note in his voice. “You won’t even notice. The others will all be here, and I’ll come right back.”

“It’s not the same if you’re not here,” he says, and Jeno rubs his back gently.

“Thanks,” he says, voice inflected like he’s genuinely flattered. Renjun does mean it, even if he’d only ever say it in heat.

The itch is telling him to get back to the nest—anyone could come in and ruin it while he’s not there. But he lets himself have a moment with Jeno. The affection is soothing, making him preen under the attention. It’s nice to be held like this—makes him half-believe Mark’s words from last night.

Then he climbs off Jeno without a word, grabs Mark’s extra blanket from across the bed, and darts out through the corridor and back into his own room. It’s untouched from when he’d left it five minutes ago, thankfully.

He arranges the hoodie at the foot of the bed and the sweatpants at the head, with Mark’s blanket across the whole thing. It’s still not enough Jeno, but he’s satisfied for now. He can always go back and get his pillow once he’s out of bed.

From there, he works through his pack logically and efficiently. He goes over to the room across the hall, where Jisung and Chenle are sharing for the week, and Jaemin still has all his things. Chenle and Jisung have plenty of worn clothes lying around for him to choose from, it’s just the matter of choosing the right things—Chenle’s scent can overwhelm everyone else’s if he’s not careful, and with seven mates to balance out in the nest, the ratio of scents is an art form. From Jaemin, he takes the stuffed toys he keeps by the bed—the scent on them is faint, but Jaemin’s scent is already permeating the room enough, what with him sleeping in there.

The clothes are arranged carefully, comfortably, all on the bed. That’s the most important thing.

Last comes the hardest two—he’s pretty sure Donghyuck and Yangyang are still in bed right now, but this can’t wait. It’s all wrong without his whole pack in the mix.

Getting to Donghyuck’s room means passing by the living room too, where Mark inevitably wishes him a good morning and Jisung and Chenle both raise their heads to watch him pass by. But he’s on a mission too important to be stopped.

Yangyang is awake, watching something on his phone, but Donghyuck is still dead asleep. Typical.

“Hey, baby,” Yangyang says, surprised to see him. “You okay?”

“I need your stuff,” he says, feeling his cheeks warming.

“Sure,” Yangyang says, peppy, sitting up with his hair a mess. “Like, my clothes? They’re in there.”

He points to the wardrobe, and Renjun nearly stamps his foot in frustration. He doesn’t know where any of Yangyang’s things are in here, and he hates that feeling.

“Not washed. I need something worn.” He realises he’s eyeing up the shirt Yangyang is wearing as he speaks.

“Pile down there,” Donghyuck mumbles, rolling over with his eyes mostly closed. “Behind the dresser.”

Renjun rounds the dresser to find the clothes both Yangyang and Donghyuck had worn yesterday in a neat pile on the floor. He’s pink-cheeked, again, at how easily his mates have seen through him.

It makes him feel irritable even though the gesture is nice, and he’s incredibly relieved to have the problem solved. He always feels irritable at Donghyuck on his heat—Mark’s gentle voice suggesting it’s internalised sexism always rings through his mind, making him restrain from a snarky comment or rebuttal. But he can’t quite thank him, either.

He gathers up the clothes and leaves the room again without another word. Chenle raises an eyebrow at him as he does, and Renjun plucks the cracker bread he’s eating out of his hand, taking a bite and continuing on with no mind to Chenle’s protests. What? He’d wanted it.

The pile Donghyuck had left him is perfect. The clothes are added to the nest, and when they’re done, he crawls into the bed and feels at ease. The itch is almost gone—he just needs to rearrange a few things. Angle the blind just right. Empty out the bin. Give the surfaces a wipe.

But for now, he lets himself relax into the perfect balance of scents he’s scavenged and arranged around himself. This is a nest. This is home.

-

He wakes up from his nap four hours later. The nest stress has gone, but the cramps have come on in full force. He feels lonely with no one there to wake up with, but he needs to make sure everyone likes his nest before he can invite Jaemin back in.

Then he realises what woke him. Jeno is walking past his room, calling out to some others in the house that he’s headed out to his shift.

He bolts up. This can’t wait.

“Jeno,” he calls out, swinging open the bedroom door and running out into the hallway. Jeno stands by the door, clearly about to leave, and Mark peers in at Renjun from where he’s still sat in the living room. Yangyang has joined him, leaning over to look at him too.

“Yes?” he asks, slightly concerned.

“Come—can you come here,” he says, quieter, but still urgent. He’s fully aware he’s going to make Jeno late like this, but he just can’t wait until midnight. “Please?”

Jeno dutifully closes the door again and crosses the apartment. Renjun takes his hand and pulls him into his bedroom, bringing him in to look at the nest.

He doesn’t say anything—it’s hard to express what he needs. But Jeno knows.

“You’ve done a great job in here,” he says, squeezing Renjun’s hand. “It’s perfect.”

“Is it okay?” he says, not looking at him. He knows, fundamentally, that this is silly. But it doesn’t stop him from wanting the affirmation.

“It’s really good,” Jeno reassures him. “You need me to scent anything before I go?”

In an ideal world, he and Jeno would lie here a little while. Jeno can’t know if the nest is really perfect without trying it out—he’s currently just looking at a pile of clothes on a messy bed, inside an otherwise well-tidied room. But his sense of smell should tell him enough, at least. It’s the betas he’ll really need to order into the bed to test it out.

“It’s okay,” he says, pulling him down to put a hand in his hair and kiss him tenderly before he goes. “I’ll miss you. Come home soon.”

“You know it won’t be too long,” Jeno says, a little embarrassed, but Renjun means it. Having everyone out at the same time is one thing—that’s just a normal weekday. But Jeno’s schedule being different every week is something he dislikes at the best of times. “I have to go now. I love you.”

“I love you,” he says, and kisses him again.

He goes right out to the front door to see him go, and feels a bit like a pathetic puppy for it. But once Jeno is out of the house, he only has to pick up Mark from the living room and pull him in next.

“Good job, baby,” he says, more interested in giving Renjun kisses to his face.

“You haven’t even looked at it,” he says unhappily, and Mark pulls back to survey the nest properly.

“You know, I’m no expert, but I don’t think it could be better,” he says, then pulls Renjun down onto the bed and wraps his arms around him, kissing his neck. Renjun feels safe like this, but tuts at Mark, all the while pulling him closer.

“It’s silly,” he says quietly, and Mark hushes him.

“It’s not. It’s lovely.”

-

He and Mark lay there for a while, Mark chatting to him about his week and Renjun talking about his. At dinner time, Mark coaxes him out of his room to come and eat whatever Jaemin is cooking up with the rest of them.

“I don’t smell too bad?” he asks, hesitantly.

“Absolutely not,” Mark tells him.

He supposes with Jeno out of the house, he only has Mark and Donghyuck to worry about. Mark is adamant he’s okay, and Donghyuck likes to eat later anyway. So he comes and sits as Jaemin serves up a pot of tteokkboki, listening to Chenle and Yangyang talk about some game, Mark and Jisung about school. Jaemin simply sits with him, listening and eating and shooting Renjun soft smiles.

He’s hungrier than he realised, eating and eating until he’s full and sleepy again. He pulls Yangyang from his seat once he’s finished his food, and Yangyang goes with it, walking backwards towards Renjun’s room.

“Do I get to see it?”

“Of course you do.”

“Really?”

Renjun pushes him inside and closes the door, crossing his arms. “It’s not much to see. I just—I need to, right now. It feels important to me.”

“It’s good!” Yangyang says, hands on his hips. He looks at Renjun expectantly, and Renjun feels bad for making him nervous.

“Get in,” he says, pointing at the bed, and Yangyang acquiesces, putting up his hands. Renjun climbs in after him, cuddling up close—Yangyang’s scent is endlessly comforting. His head is swimming a little, and he’s worried he’ll fall asleep only halfway through dragging his pack into the nest.

“It’s comfy,” Yangyang says, and that satisfies him. He’d meant that. “And snuggly.”

“Too snuggly,” he sighs. “I don’t want to sleep. I’ve slept all day.”

“If you need it, you need it.”

“Hmm.” He feels wrung out for no reason. “What is Donghyuck doing?”

“Just gaming. You know how he is.”

Insecurity niggles at him. It must be so much nicer for Yangyang to be spending time with Donghyuck right now. Despite his heat being around the corner, he doesn’t have annoying pre-heat symptoms like Renjun, just some cravings and backache. He can still do everything he wants to do. And when his actual heat hits—probably tonight or tomorrow—he doesn’t tend to nest like Renjun does. He gets horny and needy, but those are pretty easy to resolve, and relatively short lived compared to Renjun’s whole process.

Usually Donghyuck is the first in heat, triggering the rest of them a few days later. This time around, Renjun’s heat will have started first, and will finish last. Yangyang will be sick of him acting like this by Friday.

“Are you getting along with him well?”

“Oh yeah, really well. He’s easy-going, you know? And has a worse sleep schedule than me, so I think we suit each other. I’d be annoying you so much if I were in here.”

He buries his nose into Yangyang’s neck to ignore the fact that his heart is stinking further. Yangyang wraps his arms around him.

“So it’s good? With Hyuck?”

“It’s really good. Don’t worry about us.”

“Okay.” He bites his lip, not wanting to take up any more of Yangyang’s time. “I need to show the others before I sleep again.”

“Want me to fetch someone?”

He nods, and Yangyang strokes through his hair once before getting up and ushering in Chenle.

“What’s got you so miserable?” he asks when he comes in, and Renjun rolls over so he has his back to him.

“Nothing.”

“Uh-huh,” Chenle climbs into the bed, hugging from behind, and Renjun’s mouth twists. “Your nest smells good. Smells like everyone.”

Chenle still has a better sense of smell than your average beta, but it’s not as strong as it used to be. He probably can’t tell how distinct his scent is, too easy to pick out amongst the others.

“Do you miss Jeno?” Chenle asks, voice gentle, and Renjun is reminded all over again that his pack isn’t all quite here.

“Yes,” he says, and Chenle nuzzles against his back.

“He’ll be back.”

He presses his lips together to avoid crying. He doesn’t know why he wants to cry.

Jisung comes next, at the same time as Jaemin. They’re both so gentle with him on his heat, and he kind of doesn’t hate it.

“Wow,” Jaemin gushes as he comes in. “You’ve worked hard in here! It looks so good now!”

“Yeah,” Jisung agrees, looking around wide-eyed, like he’s trying to spot what he’s supposed to be seeing.

“Can you both just come in,” he says, sitting on the bed, needlessly frustrated. “I’m tired.”

“Of course, baby,” Jaemin says, climbing over him and giving him a kiss as he passes. Jisung comes more carefully, and Renjun takes one of his hands as they lie down. It’s so big around Renjun’s.

As they get settled, he murmurs, “Is it comfy?”

“So comfy,” Jaemin says, kissing the back of his ear. Renjun keeps his eyes on Jisung.

“It’s really warm,” he says. “Feels safe.”

That’s the highest praise he could ask for, and he brings Jisung’s hand closer to his chest.

“You don’t want to show Hyuckie before you sleep?” Jaemin asks gently.

“I’ll show him tomorrow,” he mumbles. He doesn’t want to disturb him and Yangyang if they’re gaming together.

“Okay,” Jaemin says quietly. “But you know he’d like to see it.”

“Mmh,” he murmurs, and grips Jisung’s hand tighter. “Sleep now.”

“Sleep now?” Jisung asks. It’s barely 8pm.

“Sleep now,” Jaemin agrees, patting Renjun’s side, squashed in the bed together.

-

He’s awoken by Jeno coming back home. Even from here, Renjun can tell he smells of strangers, the colleagues and customers he works with all day. Jisung has left for his own bedroom at some point, but Jaemin is still sleeping behind him.

He tries to ignore the scent, but he feels wide awake. Jeno will get a shower as soon as he can, knowing him—Renjun just needs to keep out of his way until then.

But he’s missed him.

He slips out of bed, careful not to disturb Jaemin, and tip toes over to the door. It sounds like Mark is still awake in the living room, he and Jeno exchanging a low conversation. He tunes in at the sound of his name.

“Is Renjun still awake?”

“Don’t think so. He and Jaemin disappeared hours ago.”

“I was worried he might stay up. Everyone’s been in the nest now?”

“Think so. Donghyuck was moping earlier that he was left until last, though.”

He feels irrationally irritated by the sentiment. If Donghyuck was interested in his nest, he should’ve come out of his room and looked interested. Renjun isn’t running around after him when he’s busy with Yangyang.

Jeno laughs softly. “Come to bed soon. Don’t study through the night.”

“I’ll come soon.” The sound of a kiss.

“I’m going to borrow your sweatpants.”

“What happened to yours?”

“Renjun took them,” he says, and Mark makes a noise of comprehension. “Literally left me naked for them.”

Mark laughs then, and Renjun feels a hot sort of shame in his gut. They’re laughing at him for nesting—he knew they all think it’s stupid. It is stupid.

“Whatever our baby needs,” he says, and Jeno makes a noise of agreement. Then he makes his way through the house, slowing as he passes Renjun’s room. “You sure he’s asleep?” he whispers back to Mark, sounding incredibly close behind the bedroom door. Jeno must be able to smell him—he can smell Jeno stronger from here, too. The scents of strangers clinging to him is making him feel nauseous.

“Go and shower, I’ll check.”

Jeno moves away, and Mark’s scent approaches the door, knocking very gently against it. It doesn’t even stir Jaemin.

Renjun ignores it, standing in the doorway and staring. Eventually Mark moves away again, and neither he nor Jeno moves to disturb them after that.

He sits on the edge of the bed and curls into himself. It’s far from the first time he’s wished he could be a normal omega, with normal desires, without his broken body. Even with seven mates, he’s not quite whole enough for any of them.

-

DAY 4

He doesn’t sleep for a long time, lying there with Jaemin beside him, thinking over all the ways he’s making life harder for his pack. If he were living with himself, he’d find it unbearable.

He smells Jeno’s rut when it’s triggered in the night, the way it calls to him. Mark packs up and heads to bed shortly after—no doubt to help Jeno burn through part of it. If Renjun were a better omega, he’d go after him, make sure his alpha’s needs are being met, even if he himself can’t meet them.

Donghyuck’s heat comes on in the morning, too. He has to bury his head under a pillow to block out the spikes in Donghyuck’s scent that permeate the whole house—he angrily pushes Donghyuck’s clothes to the foot of the bed, and buries his face into Jisung’s t-shirt. Mark’s rut is probably here too, the suppressants just make it harder to smell. Knowing that he’s triggered the others isn’t doing his mood any favours, no matter how inevitable this was.

When Jaemin wakes up, he strokes his thumb along Renjun’s cheek gently. Renjun knows he must look awful after so little sleep.

“Baby,” he says, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “Bad night?”

He sniffs. “Yeah.”

“You need painkillers?”

He does, but he doesn’t feel like he deserves them. The cramps are keeping him curled into the bed, unable to get up and ruin anything else. “Mmh.”

“I’ll get them for you.”

Jaemin comes back from his short foray into the kitchen to update him on what he already knows.

“Everyone else has been triggered today. We’ve got a full house.”

“Chenle?” he says, fear making his heart jump.

“No, not Chenle,” Jaemin smiles. “I wasn’t counting him. He’s doing just fine.”

He exhales. That’s something. “Is Mark still able to do his exam?”

“You know nothing could stop him, baby. If I ask you something, will you be honest with me?”

He sits up at Jaemin’s beckoning, taking the painkillers he hands him. “What is it?”

“Will you be okay on your own for a little while today?”

He shrinks into himself. He knew he was being too demanding. “I’ll be okay,” he says, tipping back his painkillers.

“Not because I want to,” he says, kissing his forehead. “The betas were talking about how we’re going to split up our mating season leave last night.”

Of course—it’s Monday. His pack should all have work and school, but Jeno and Donghyuck will have called in to take their designated two days of mating leave. With Mark in rut, he’ll probably only go in for his exam and come back again. But the betas can choose when to take their precious two days of permitted leave around everyone’s ruts and heats.

“Yangyang and I are taking ours today and tomorrow. Jisung is taking his later in the week, so he can stay with you then. Chenle will play it by ear. But I need to spend some time with Jeno today, make sure he’s okay.”

“Of course.” It’ll be better for Jaemin, anyway—he’ll get to spend some time away from Renjun’s incessant neediness in heat. He can take care of himself for a day.

Jaemin cups his face and kisses him, smile still loving and affectionate despite everything. “I’ll come and check in on you, and Jisung said he will after his class. Chenle will be around later on, too. Don’t struggle on your own if you need something, alright?”

“I know,” he says, laying back down in the bed. They can hear Mark making moves from the kitchen—he must be headed out soon. “Go and give Jeno some company.”

Jaemin kisses him again. “I love you. You know where to find me if you need me.”

“I love you too,” he says, though his voice feels detached from the rest of him.

-

He spends the morning in something of a daze. He tries to read a book, but doesn’t take much of it in. When he gets up to shower, it’s not a long one—he’s too wary about meeting someone in the bathroom. Just the smell of Jeno’s rut and Donghyuck’s heat from opposite sides of the house is making him feel faint.

To remedy that, he tries to make himself a late lunch. Jeno and Jaemin are locked away in one room, Donghyuck and Yangyang in another, and he hurriedly checks through the cupboards while the rest of the house is empty. Despite the call of his nature to go to them, the very thought of walking in on either of them panics him, and he’s ready to hide back in his room.

Jaemin must be enjoying it while he can—the carnal pleasures of a submissive alpha like Jeno in rut, versus looking after the most pathetic omega he’s probably ever known. It’s not much of a competition. He slams a cupboard door—nothing he wants in there. Maybe Jaemin will have kept some leftovers in the fridge.

He opens the door, picking out some Tupperware that looks promising. Right behind it is a large cardboard box—for what? Who bought a cake? If this is a stupid ‘Congrats on surviving your heat’ cake like the one Jaemin made for them last year, he won’t be held accountable for hurting someone’s feelings.

He pulls it out onto the table, opens up the lid, and…

It says ‘Happy Birthday Yangyang’.

He shoots around to look at the calendar pinned to the fridge. He’s lost track of the days, but apparently it’s Monday the 8^th of October. Yangyang’s birthday is the day after tomorrow.

A sob escapes him, and it shocks him, ringing out in the kitchen. He puts his hands up over his mouth, muffling any more unwitting sounds. In the midst of the moving in hassle, his early heat, worrying about Chenle and Mark and work and Donghyuck and Yangyang and Jeno—he’d forgotten about Yangyang’s birthday.

He’s the worst mate ever.

He carefully closes the box again and slides it back onto the fridge shelf. He doesn’t even have a gift for him.

“You okay?”

Renjun spins in place, still clutching the Tupperware box. He’d been so distracted, he didn’t notice Donghyuck sneaking up on him, skin flushed, short shorts and a large t-shirt on.

The t-shirt is Yangyang’s—he recognises it from one of the matching sets they have. Now that he’s noticed him, Renjun can’t un-notice how much he reeks of heat and sex.

“No,” he says, clutching the box and storming past him.

“Hey,” Donghyuck says, reaching out to grab his arm as he passes by. Renjun shakes him off and storms on. “Renjun!”

“Don’t,” he says, reaching his bedroom door, but Donghyuck is coming after him.

“What have I done, huh? Why are you pissed at me now?”

“Not everything is about you.”

“Except this is about me! Do you know how shitty it feels to be the only one in this pack you discard whenever you feel like it?”

There’s one golden rule for their pack during mating season. It’s been in place three years running now, with no exceptions. Mark writes it on the fridge whiteboard every year.

Donghyuck and Renjun are not allowed to see each other when both are in heat. They lose all ability to be nice to each other, and it gets ugly quickly.

He whips around, turning back to face him. “Don’t act like you give a shit now.”

“When have I not?” Donghyuck laughs at him, and he sees red. “What has given you that impression? Because I agonise over leaving you clothes, and you’re unhappy. I stay out of your way, and you’re unhappy. I come and check on you after three days of barely seeing you, and you’re shouting at me like I’ve killed your family. What can I do? What will please his highness today?”

“Build your own nest, if that's what this is all about. Why do you need to see mine?”

“I’m your mate, aren’t I?” Donghyuck says, and Renjun can’t stand the smell of him this close. He smells so much like Yangyang. “I’m in heat, aren’t I? Should nobody consider what I want, or does everything have to be to your whims, exactly how you like it, no matter how anyone else feels?”

An uncertain voice interrupts them. “Guys?”

It’s Yangyang. He’s stood at the end of the hallway, watching them both. Neither of them have fought with Yangyang before—not properly—and they’ve never fought with each other in front of Yangyang. They only fight like this when they’re in heat. Hence the golden rule.

Even though this isn’t how their relationship works—how any healthy pack should manage fights— he wants Yangyang to side with him right now. He wants Yangyang to step up and tell Donghyuck to back off, that there’s a good reason he hasn’t been invited into Renjun’s nest.

The fact that he wants that only proves Donghyuck’s point, though.  Shame holds him tight, and fear licks at his heels. This is exactly the sort of thing he was worried about Yangyang experiencing in his first few days as pack—exactly the sort of thing that might drive him away.

“Hey,” Jaemin’s voice comes, much more firmly, from the other end of the corridor. His hair is all messed up, and he’s wearing less than Donghyuck is. “Separate, now. No more of this.”

Renjun turns and goes into his room, slamming the door behind him. He bursts into tears as he does, as silently as he can, but he knows his scent change will give him away.

“Should I…?” he can hear Yangyang say, and the low murmur of Jaemin’s voice in reply.

“No, you keep Hyuckie company. Did you come for food, Hyuck?”

“Just water,” Donghyuck grumbles. “Are you…?”

“Yeah.”

There’s some shuffling around. He doesn’t really keep track of it through his tears, sitting down beside his bed, Tupperware abandoned on the floor beside him. He tries to control all the crying, but it’s relentless.

After a few minutes, Jaemin enters, much more clothed than before. He sits beside Renjun, murmuring soft words to him, and puts his arms around him.

“Hey, my baby. It’s okay. It’s okay.”

Renjun curls up into him and cries into his shoulder, gripping onto his t-shirt. He smells like Jeno’s rut, and like sex too, but he doesn’t mind it so much on Jaemin. Not when he holds him so gently, stroking down his hair and rocking him slightly as Renjun cries out his frustrations.

“What’s got you like this?” Jaemin asks. “You should’ve told me if you weren’t ready to be alone. We’re supposed to be here for you if you need us.”

He shakes his head, hiccupping. He doesn’t know how to explain that it feels like one thing after another is piling up on him, weighing him down, and the whole heap of problems seem world-ending. Verbalising them is hard—he’s not sure he can explain why everything feels terrible. But it doesn’t stop him from feeling broken-down and exhausted. “I-I’m just tired. Didn’t sleep.”

“No, you didn’t,” Jaemin agrees, stroking his back in rhythmic patterns, soothing. “You want to take your meds?”

“Later,” he sniffs. “I need to eat first.”

“Okay.” Jaemin leans out, and gently presses a kiss to Renjun’s cheek. “Is there anything else you want to tell me about?”

Anything else? He’s afraid Mark is going to come back upset, with a bad exam performance. He’s afraid Chenle will come home in heat, in hysterics like he was last year. He’s worried Jeno is going to get sick of his nesting neediness, and ask for his clothes back—he feels guilty for forgetting Yangyang’s birthday, and furious at Donghyuck for poking him right where it hurts, for probably telling Yangyang right now just how horrible he is as a mate. He’s afraid Jisung will come home to all of this and turn on his heel and run—he doesn’t do well with confrontation, and gets overwhelmed easily.

But saying all of this would burden Jaemin more than he already is, trying to keep their household together as Renjun tears it apart, thread by thread.

“Did you buy the cake?” he asks instead, voice small.

“Ah, you found that? Jeno had it ordered, actually. Someone had already put Yangyang’s birthday on the calendar, and Jisung noticed it on Saturday.”

That was him, about a month or so ago. He hadn’t wanted to miss it—he’s never had a chance to celebrate Yangyang’s birthday with him before.

So much for that.

“I forgot,” he admits in a whisper. “I forgot about it.”

“I think you can be forgiven for that. It’s hard to remember which way is up and down when your body is fighting you at every turn. We’re going to celebrate it at the weekend, okay? We talked about it already. No one will be in a state for a party before then, and Yangyang is never going to want to leave you out of something like that.”

“It’s my fault,” he says, and Jaemin sighs into his hair.

“You know it’s not, baby. No one blames you. I promise you.”

Renjun doesn’t say anything to that, and the two of them sit there quietly for a few minutes, as Renjun’s breathing comes back to normal and his eyes sting less.

Jaemin points at the Tupperware box. “Can I heat that up for you? And get you your medication? The doctor said it would help you sleep.”

“Sure,” he says. They might as well knock him out—he’s too much hassle right now. He’d welcome sleep over this any day.

Jaemin does as he promises, and sits with Renjun as he slowly eats the tteokkbokki. Then he takes the medication, and downs a glass of water after it.

He’s out like a light ten minutes later.

-

DAY 5

He wakes slowly, body heavy. Sound filters in. He’s not alone in his bed—Jisung is here, already awake, tapping at his phone.

“Sungie,” he says, the word fighting him. He’s still sleepy.

“Hyung,” Jisung says, dropping his phone and slouching down to get a good look at him. “You’re awake?”

“Mmh,” he says, though he barely feels it.

“Your meds are something else,” Jisung says. “You’ve been asleep for fifteen hours.”

That makes him furrow his brow. “What time ‘sit?”

“Six AM.”

That explains how quiet the rest of the house is. Only Mark will be heading out today, for his second exam, and Chenle and Jisung when their classes require them.

“You’re really cute right now,” Jisung tells him, and Renjun furrows his brow further.

“M’tired,” he says, and Jisung’s warmth envelops his side, an arm slinging over his stomach.

“Exactly,” Jisung says, and they lie there for a little while as Renjun dozes.

This—this is nice. It’s warm and homely, and Jisung doesn’t smell of anyone but himself. This is safe.

Yesterday comes back in bits and pieces. Though it seems long ago now, he regrets lashing out at Donghyuck like that. If he were in Donghyuck’s position, he’d be upset too.

Just as he thinks he might drift off again, his stomach rumbles. Jisung laughs, just a puff of air in his ear, warm on his neck, and pats Renjun’s stomach.

“Hungry?”

“Sleepy,” he says, and Jisung smiles against his shoulder.

“Jaemin-hyung said you had to eat when you woke up.”

He groans and rolls onto his side, closer to Jisung, burrowing into the sheets. “S’not the boss of me.” His stomach grumbles again.

“No, but Chenle making breakfast is.”

Jisung sits up expectantly, and Renjun tips his head back to look at him. He’s right—if Chenle is making breakfast, he has no choice but to go and eat it. But that means moving.

He reaches his arms out to Jisung, making little grabbing motions with his hands so Jisung will get the message.

“Cute,” Jisung says quietly, then puts his arms around Renjun’s waist to pull him up. Renjun leans into him as he does, a little unsteady on his feet, but breathing in deeply now that he’s the right way up in the world.

“Dizzy?” Jisung asks, and Renjun realises he’s still gripping him. “It says on the bottle that might be a side effect of your medication.”

“Mmh,” he says again. He can’t think of anything but breakfast.

Luckily, Jisung is his soulmate, so he gets it. “Let’s go and eat.”

Jisung drapes Mark’s blanket over Renjun’s shoulders, and they shuffle out into the hallway together. He’s greeted to the sight of Chenle and Mark sat in the kitchen, both sleep soft, a pot of porridge waiting on the table between them.

“Good morning, baby,” Mark says, reaching out to ruffle his hair as he sits next to him, Jisung on his other side. “How are you today?”

“Hungry,” he says, staring at the pot as if it will crack open and pour out into a bowl for him.

“You can have some, I made plenty,” Chenle says. Renjun just looks at him, then back down at the pot.

“Hyung is still sleepy from his medication,” Jisung says, a smile in his voice, and one creeps onto Chenle’s face too.

“Our baby is sleepy, hm?” he says in Mandarin. Renjun feels warm, and not just because of the blanket. Hearing his native language embrace him like a hug only adds to his feeling of submerged calm. “I’ll serve you some, baby.”

He watches Chenle as he opens up the pot and serves Renjun a bowl full, then teases Jisung when he asks for the same treatment, telling him to give him some aegyo first.

Chenle is in… a good mood, he realises, picking up his spoon with a little difficulty and eating his first scoop of porridge. Chenle has made good food, and he’s in a good mood, and… he’s happy.

And he smells like Mark. He’s just noticing it now—they must’ve shared a room last night.

“You’re still out of it, huh?” Mark says, stroking his shoulder, and Renjun looks up at him.

“Hm?”

“You’re so sleepy, baby,” Mark says, stealing a kiss. “You’re so cute.”

“Do you have an exam?” he asks, trying to remember why Mark is awake early. The porridge is so good.

“Yeah, I’m headed out soon. Chenle made me this for luck, so now I gotta ace this one.”

“You’re gonna ace it,” he repeats quietly, then leans in for his own kiss. He misses a little, kissing his bottom lip and chin. “Good luck.”

“Thank you, baby,” Mark smiles, eyes shining as he leans forward. He’s finished his own porridge, but seems perfectly content watching Renjun eat his.

“You need to go soon,” Chenle reminds him. “Don’t be late.”

 Mark takes off shortly after. Renjun feels as though he’s been sat here eating the porridge for an age, but he’s barely dented his portion.

“I think you need to sleep some more,” Chenle remarks, watching him.

“Uh-huh,” he says, looking down at his porridge. “You slept with Mark?”

Jisung seems surprised. “You did?”

“Yeah,” Chenle says, relaxed. “It was totally fine. You’re not still worrying about me, are you?”

“I worry ‘bout all of you,” he sighs, dropping the spoon back in the bowl. It’s delicious, but he’s not sure how much longer he can eat it. “I was scared for you.”

“Worry about yourself,” Chenle says, not unkindly. “If I were going to be triggered, it would’ve happened yesterday, with each of you. I’m taking my mating leave from classes today and tomorrow—I’m so sure it’s not going to hit now.”

“And you’re happy?” he asks, just to be sure.

Chenle grins at him. “I am probably happier than anyone in this house right now. Maybe you should try blockers next.”

“As long as you’re happy,” he says, eyelids slipping closed.

“Woah, woah, not here,” Jisung says, pulling Renjun up from his seat with an arm around his middle. “Back to bed.”

They traipse back down the corridor together, and Jisung deposits Renjun in bed. Renjun brings out the grabby hands again, though he’s struggling to tell which direction Jisung is in.

“I have class soon,” Jisung says apologetically, taking one of Renjun’s hands in his own. “I’m sorry, I can’t stay. But if Chenle is here today—do you want him with you?”

“Yeah,” he says, sighing into the sheets. “Please.”

“Okay,” Jisung says, tucking him in under the covers. Then he hesitates a moment, and kisses Renjun’s forehead.

No matter how tired he is, vision blurred, movements lethargic, he doesn’t nod off until Chenle joins him in the bed, murmuring sweet nicknames to him. They cuddle up close, and Renjun nestles his head into the crook of Chenle’s neck, and sleeps.

-

The next time he wakes up, he’s in pain.

He doesn’t know what time it is, but Chenle is sat up in the bed next to him, typing on his laptop. He can hear Donghyuck and Jaemin’s voices having a conversation down the hallway. His head feels like it’s ringing, and his stomach pulls tightly with cramps. As he curls further into himself, his back twinges and smarts too.

“What’s up?” Chenle says, and he blinks tears from his eyes. “You hurting?”

A hand comes to his hair, gently stroking it. The feeling doesn’t alleviate the pain, but it does remind him he isn’t alone in it. “Yes.”

“You want painkillers?”

“I can’t have them,” he says, too tired to explain. He’s not allowed to have regular painkillers if he’s taking the prescribed ones over his heat—especially after how sleepy they had made him.

Chenle either remembers this, or takes his word for it. “You want a hot water bottle?”

“Yes.”

Chenle slips out of the bed to fetch it for him, which leaves him alone for a minute, and leaves the door partly open. Jaemin and Donghyuck have moved away, but he can smell Jeno down the hall, doing something in the living room.

He pushes himself up, and all his limbs ache. His head pounds harder—all he wants is to lie down again. But he reaches the door. His scent must signal his presence, because Jeno turns around and meets his gaze.

“Renjun? You okay?”

Jeno smells less of rut than he did yesterday—he must be near the end of it. “Do you want your sweatpants back?” he asks, rubbing his eyes.

“What?” Jeno asks. He’s surprised—why? It’s not like Renjun is rejecting his nest offering. He was being a bother by taking them in the first place.

“You can have them back if you want, it’s okay.”

“No, I meant it when I said you could have them.” Jeno comes over to him, running a hand down his arm almost shyly. “Why—why would you ask me that?”

He rests against the doorway. “I heard you and Mark talking the other night. I know it was stupid of me to take them. It’s not like I need to nest, anyway, so you can—”

“It’s not stupid. We’ve never thought that about you. I don’t know what you heard from that conversation, but I—it’s special when you nest. It means… we’re all your pack. It’s precious to me.”

“You were laughing,” he says, voice empty.

Jeno’s scent dips, the way a dog might lower its tail. “We weren’t laughing at you. We’d never do that to you.” His hand comes up lightly, thumb running over Renjun’s jaw, lifting his face until Jeno meets his eyes. He’s looking mournful and mopey. “I’m sorry we upset you. We—we both like it. We were talking about it because we were happy about it.”

Renjun places a hand over Jeno’s on his cheek. “Really?”

“Really really,” Jeno promises. His large hands are gentle with Renjun. “I think everyone likes your nest more than you do.”

“I like it. I just feel embarrassed by it.”

“You don’t have to. None of us feel like that.”

Renjun embraces him then, despite the rut scent, despite the sweaty clothes and the 2-day stubble, despite the fact that he feels he could drop any moment from pain in his stomach.

“I love you,” Jeno says into his hair.

“I love you too,” Renjun replies.

Chenle returns, and Renjun parts from Jeno to get his hands on some kind of pain relief. Jeno’s hand lingers on his shoulder until he fully pulls away.

He lies in bed and watches Chenle write his essay for a while, hot water bottle pressed to his stomach, Chenle humming gently next to him.

“You and Jeno okay?” Chenle asks eventually, only half paying attention to the journal he’s scrolling through.

“We’re okay,” he responds, having burrowed further into Chenle’s side.

“Good,” he responds, putting a hand in Renjun’s hair to scratch gently at his scalp. “And Donghyuck?”

He takes a moment to respond. “I’ll talk to him when my heat is over.”

“Why do you two end up fighting every mating season?” Chenle asks, nonchalant.

“It’s just because we’re both omegas,” Renjun mumbles. “You know what they say, about omega jealousy in packs—”

“That’s old sexist bullshit, and you know it. You didn’t fight with me last mating season.”

“Maybe I could tell you weren’t an omega then.”

Chenle snorts. “I barely realised it then.”

“Right but… you hated heats as much as I do,” he argues. “We’re the same.”

“Aha, you see? It’s not about your secondary gender, it’s about your heat.”

He scrunches up his nose. “Same thing.”

Chenle shakes his head and waggles his finger at Renjun. “Nope, it’s not. Are you jealous because he has a better time on his heat than you?”

“I’m not…” he can’t bring himself to finish the sentence. Even if he doesn’t like admitting it, he is incredibly jealous. The omission is enough of an admittance for Chenle.

“Are you jealous because his body does what it’s supposed to?” Chenle asks, and Renjun hates how much he knows. “Are you jealous because he gets to spend time being intimate with your pack, while you feel like a burden to them?”

He rolls over to look up at Chenle. Chenle is looking right back, eyebrows raised.

“Do you think you’re the only one who’s felt like that? You shouldn’t be afraid to say those things. Being honest with your feelings is the best thing you could do for yourself.”

“You never took your anger out on Donghyuck,” Renjun says quietly. “I can’t be as nice as you.”

“That’s because it wasn’t Donghyuck I was jealous of,” Chenle replies. “It was Jaemin. And I did take my jealousy out on him. Don’t you remember when I avoided him over my pre-heat, my heat, and for like, a week after? That’s the meanest thing I could’ve done to Jaemin. All he wants is to take care of people. But the fact that mating season for him would just be… like, any other week, made me so mad. So jealous, I realised afterwards. Cause that’s all I wanted for myself, when my heat made me feel like crawling out of my own skin.”

“You figured that out in your first year spending mating season with us,” Renjun says, sitting up with his back against the wall, blanket over his legs, knees up to his chest. “I’m now three years running with the pack, and I still don’t know how not to be furious at Donghyuck for having all the things I can’t have. But he didn’t do anything wrong.”

“But what is it exactly he has, specifically? Why just Donghyuck?”

“What?”

“I mean, he can have sex with the others, sure. But it’s not like you want that anyway, right? Everyone is still willing to give you time and intimacy in different ways, so… not that. A healthy body, yes, but Mark and Jeno also have that over mating season, and you don’t feel that about them. Us betas have a perfectly pleasant few days, and you’re not lashing out at any of us. Why just Donghyuck?”

He scrubs at one eye for a moment, feeling exhausted. “I just feel so… useless during mating season.”

“You’re all useless during mating season. That’s kind of the point.”

“No, I mean… Jeno and Mark, when they’re in rut, they both work the same. You know? If neither of them are medicated, the two of them have the same needs, work on the same routines and the same cycle. But me and Donghyuck… he is the model of what we both should be. And that works for everyone—it works for him, it works for the alphas, it works for the betas. In comparison, my heat isn’t just useless, it’s a pain and an inconvenience for everyone. That’s something I can never match him on, but I’m supposed to. We should be, if only I wasn’t broken.”

“Don’t call yourself that,” Chenle says, tone dropping. “I’m serious. You can’t change what you are, Renjun, and sometimes that sucks—there’s no doubt that your heat sucks, and we all wish we could make it easier on you. But denying it’s a part of you is only going to make everything worse. Hating yourself for it isn’t going to get you anywhere. No one thinks you’re a burden—no one hates you for having chronic pain and needing some TLC one week of the year. Are you kidding me? Everyone in this pack would do it year round if you needed it—this is nothing. Did you think I was a burden, when my heat made me unable to talk to anyone last year? Unable to let anyone touch me? Did you hate me, and think I wasn’t worth having around?”

“Of course not—”

“Then why should any of us think that about you? Why should you think that about you? Why do you think everyone is still here—Mark, Hyuck and Jeno all doing this for a third year in a row—if that’s what we all think of you?”

Renjun goes silent.

Chenle shrugs, as if he’d said nothing too important, and goes back to his essay. “That’s just what I think, anyway. It’s good to say these things out loud. My first few heats, I thought every omega hated it like I did, and that was just normal. It was seeing Donghyuck last year that made me realise it’s not normal at all. You should talk about it more—who knows? Maybe Jeno thinks he’s too needy in rut too, and that everyone hates him. Maybe Mark thinks he gets useless and annoying and hates himself for it.”

“Why would they be? They can’t help being like that during rut.”

Chenle shoots him a look. “Yeah. Exactly. You see my point now?”

It’s different, he wants to say, but by Chenle’s logic—it’s not. And he knows that, objectively, obscurely, in a far-away kind of way, but… it’s hard to make himself feel it, really believe it.

Maybe Chenle is onto something about saying it out loud. As much as he hates talking about it, it does feel kind of good to get off his chest. Good to have Chenle affirm him, too. Chenle often seems to know what Renjun needs often without him ever asking.

He curls into him again, breathing slowing as he thinks over their conversation, watching Chenle tap, tap, tap away on the keyboard.

-

DAY 6

The meds are no good for him.

They were good while they lasted, sure, nearly 24 hours of being oblivious to the pain is exactly what he needed. But having to give up regular painkillers might not be worth it—especially as he’s not supposed to take the meds two days in a row.

Which means he’s got 12 hours until he can take another dose, and he’s in agony. He’d spent much of the evening on the toilet, feeling like his intestines might be liquidising inside his body, holding up the bathroom to no fewer than five visitors. Then he’d curled up in bed, head thumping, stomach twisting itself into knots.

He’d had maybe an hour or two of restless sleep. He’d dreamed that he’d been locked in a room with Yangyang, who was telling him that he’d rather be locked in a room with Donghyuck, and that he and Donghyuck have had lots of fun in their locked room without Renjun. The room had been spinning around them, but Yangyang hadn’t seemed to notice.

When he wakes up, the room is still spinning. It’s dark, and Jaemin is asleep in the bed next to him. He has no idea when Jaemin joined him, but he crawls away from him now, feeling bile in the back of his throat.

He makes it to the bathroom in time to aim for the toilet, but the sound of it echoes off the bathroom walls, and he hadn’t had time to shut the bedroom door. Tears well up, from exhaustion and pain and the uncomfortable sensation of being sick, and he hopes he’s being quiet enough that Jaemin won’t wake.

His head pounds. He hates throwing up, makes him sniffle and groan and choke on sobs as the little food he’d eaten yesterday comes back up with a vengeance. He’s not usually sick on his heat without a trigger—this must be a side-effect of the medication.

The whole house is dark, only faint streetlight coming in through the bathroom window. He has no idea how Mark’s second exam went. He can’t even remember when Chenle left yesterday. Everyone else’s heat and rut must have passed by now.

The envy makes him nearly choke, and tears slide down his face. It’s not fair, it’s not fair—why was he made like this? Chenle was wrong, he’s broken beyond belief—his body isn’t supposed to rebel like this, it’s not supposed to fight him at every move when all he wants to do is cuddle with his pack and celebrate his mate’s birthday—

His birthday. It’s Yangyang’s birthday today.

Over the sound of blood rushing in his ears and sick hitting ceramic, he can just make out someone coming into the bathroom, a voice saying something low and worried, but it’s hard to hear what. His whole body shakes with shame—he’s woken someone up. Probably Jaemin.

“He’s gonna leave,” he gurgles, disoriented. A hand is placed on his back, and he would startle if he weren’t feeling so dazed. “He’s—he’s gonna—”

“Who’s gonna leave?” the voice says, impossibly gentle, stroking his back. “No one’s leaving you, Jun.”

He gags a little, but nothing comes out—maybe he’s over the vomiting, but now he’s just left shivering and shuddering, nose running. He spits into the toilet bowl. “Yangyang,” he whines. “I think he’s going to leave.”

He cries softly, and the person beside him seems to be at a loss. The hand disappears, and the body beside him leaves.

A light comes on in the hallway. He turns his head away, unable to look at where the light breaches the bathroom doorway.

“Renjun?” Jaemin’s voice says, more confident than the first voice, coming up right beside him and wrapping his arms around him. “What’s wrong?”

“He was being sick,” the first person says, and in the light—as his brain starts to catch up with himself—he realises who it is.

“Yangyang,” he says, shame making him flush hot and gag again.

“It’s me,” Yangyang says, fretting, kneeling anxiously at Renjun’s side as Jaemin holds him. He rubs his stomach in circles as Renjun spits again, murmuring sweet assurances to him. “Baby, why did you say that?”

“You’re—you’ll leave,” he says, struggling to articulate himself.

“I’m not going to leave, not unless you ask me to,” Yangyang says, leaning in to see Renjun’s face better. Renjun wishes he wouldn’t. “Why would I do that?”

“Why would you stay?” he asks, listing to one side, struggling with orientation. “You—you and Hyuck—” he hiccups, and worries something more might come out, but nothing does.

“I think you should have this conversation in the morning,” Jaemin says, still stroking Renjun’s stomach gently. “You got it all out, Renjun-ie?”

He moans unhappily. “Yeah.”

Jaemin gestures for something, speaking over his head, and Yangyang moves away. He comes back with a wet cloth, gently wiping Renjun’s cheeks and runny nose with it. He doesn’t realise how overheated he is until the cool cloth hits his face.

“Good job, good,” Jaemin is murmuring, and he’s not sure whether it’s to him or Yangyang. “Okay. Let’s go back to bed. You want Yangyang to come with?”

“It’s his birthday,” Renjun says miserably. He coughs uncomfortably, but there’s nothing left in him to come up. “He’s—he…”

His head feels heavy, and he can’t figure out what he was going to say.

Jaemin and Yangyang share a quiet discussion—it’s hard for him to make out the words. Someone helps him to his feet, and somehow he makes it back into bed. Under the covers, there’s a body to either side of him, and the warmth of the nest takes him under quickly. Not quite asleep, at first, but in a limbo state of exhaustion. Sounds run together, the dark a thick blanket over him. Vague nightmares in short bouts of sleep—hard to remember.

Then, as the sun begins to rise, sleep.

-

He wakes up as the body to his right climbs over him, trying to move quietly out of the bed. A low conversation is had, and someone leaves the room, doesn’t come back. He drifts in and out of sleep for a while, the sounds of his pack filtering in. Cutlery tapping against ceramic in the kitchen—the bathroom door opening and closing. The shower running. Goodbyes spoken at the front door.

It’s all a haze of sound and movement that passes by outside of him. He dozes for so long it becomes hard to tell when he’d been sick.

He doesn’t properly wake up until he can’t ignore the cramps any longer, and pries his eyes open to ask whoever is next to him for the hot water bottle.

The words stall in his mouth when he sees who it is. “Yangyang?”

Yangyang looks up from his phone, eyes wide. “Baby? How are you feeling?”

“What are you doing here?” he frowns. If mating season is over for the others, Yangyang and Jaemin should both be back at work. He certainly can’t smell any of the others like before—not even on Yangyang. He smells clean and fresh and just like himself, like he’d showered this morning.

Yangyang’s expression looks nervous and guilty. “I called in sick. Don’t be mad, but I was really worried about you.”

“Me?” He scrunches up his face, curling up with a little groan. “Why?”

“Do you need something?” Yangyang says quickly. “Are you going to be sick again?”

Right, of course. He probably scared Yangyang last night, who hasn’t seen him with so much as a cold before. “Could you fill the hot water bottle?”

Yangyang grabs it and goes to do just that. He’s gone for barely a minute, and comes back with water and painkillers.

“Thanks,” he says, looking at the painkillers. If he’s not going to take any more of his medication, he could start on regular painkillers again—he doesn’t really want to chance being sick again, so close to the end of his heat. “Can I…?”

“Of course,” Yangyang says, popping them out of the packet for him. Renjun sits up and takes them, chasing them with water.

“Sorry I scared you last night,” he says when he hands the glass back. “I’m okay. I was just out of it. Did I wake you up?”

“You don’t have to apologise, I was already awake. I just wanted to… what did you mean, when you were saying all that?”

“What was I saying? I don’t really…”

“You were saying I was gonna leave,” Yangyang says, looking miserable at the concept. That’s… somewhat reassuring. He knows it was mostly his insecurity talking, but…

“I’d had a nightmare,” he says, flattening out the blanket nervously. “Where you told me you were going to leave with Donghyuck. I know you’re not leaving, I just…”

Yangyang looks at him, still unhappy. “I had no idea you were upset over my birthday and stuff. I wish I knew.”

He closes his eyes, knocking his head back against the wall. “I’m sorry. God, I’m such a mess. I wish we could’ve done something for you today.”

“I really couldn’t care less,” Yangyang says, scooting closer earnestly. “We’re gonna celebrate this weekend, right? I wasn’t even thinking about it being today—I’m just looking forward to celebrating when we can all be together, you know? You don’t have to feel bad. And, hey—I would’ve been at work today anyway, if it weren’t for you, so you kinda gave me the day off.”

Renjun looks back at him with a watery little smile. “They’re going to think you’re bunking off, for sure.”

“Nah, I told them it’s about my omega’s heat. And I just took my mating leave, so it adds up.”

“Your omega?” he asks, reaching out a hand without thinking about it. Yangyang picks it up without question.

“Right, that’s what you are. You know that, right? I’m not leaving anytime soon.”

“I know,” he says softly. “Sorry. I just have a bit of a complex about Donghyuck when I’m in heat, and I was getting jealous about you guys spending time together, and I was worried about you moving in, and… you know, when you’re sick, everything seems ten times worse than it is. But I know it’s okay, really.”

“Still,” Yangyang says, mouth unhappy, but his shoulders are more relaxed now. “You should tell me about it next time, so we don’t all end up panicking over nothing.”

“I could worry about anything on my heat. All the anxiety and misery… it gets to you.” He’s calm enough to recognise that now, but it doesn’t mean he’s not still worried. “Did you spend the whole night in here?”

“Yeah,” Yangyang says, stroking the back of his hand. He reaches out to pull Renjun into a hug, and Renjun sighs, fitting perfectly into the curve of his arm.

“With Jaemin too? Was it okay?”

“Yeah, I didn’t mind. I went to tell Donghyuck, and I think he went to sleep with Mark and Jeno, so no one was alone.”

“I woke him up too?”

“He wasn’t asleep either,” Yangyang admits, pulling them both into a careful, slow fall sideways, so they end up lying in the bed together. “He told me to go to you—I was sure he’d go. But he told me you wouldn’t react well if he went.”

Renjun sighs again, scenting Yangyang slowly, face buried in the crook of his neck. “He’s right. I’ve got to make it up to him after this.”

Yangyang lays there quietly for a few minutes, letting Renjun scent him. Then he pulls away, enough to look at Renjun’s face, and kisses him softly on the mouth.

“You want any food?”

“Yes, but only if you’re not cooking it,” he says, and smiles a little as Yangyang makes an offended noise in his throat. “Don’t look at me so closely right now. I can’t remember when I last showered.”

“Maybe shower first, then,” Yangyang says, placing a kiss on his neck. “But I think you look pretty. You always look pretty.”

“Shut up,” he says, and the air settles between them, worries dispersed.

He does get up to shower, finding he has some energy to do so, and that it’s been long enough since he changed his slick pad that he really needs to. Yangyang goes to see if Chenle is home to cook, at Renjun’s request.

When he pushes open the bathroom door, it’s to find Mark in there, stripping off for his own shower.

“Oh, hey baby,” he says, pulling his boxers down. “You okay?”

“I was going to shower,” Renjun pouts.

“We can get in together? I gotta be in school soon,” Mark says apologetically, and Renjun shrugs.

“Will you wash my hair?”

“Of course,” Mark says with a grin, turning on the water as Renjun pulls off his shirt.

“How are you feeling today? Better?” Mark asks when he steps in after him, putting Renjun under the stream first—he’s running hot, while the water is still heating up. Mark has always been thoughtful like that.

He sighs under the pleasantly cool water. “Better. Nearly at the end, now.”

“I’m so glad to hear that,” Mark says, dropping a kiss to Renjun’s shoulder before turning him around. “Let’s get soapy.”

“What about your exam? I missed you yesterday,” he says, picking up the soap. “Did it go okay?”

“It went swimmingly,” Mark says, satisfied, reaching around Renjun for the shower gel. “I saw my professor yesterday, and he was in such a good mood. I’m taking that as a good sign.”

“I’m so proud of you,” Renjun says, turning to kiss him. Mark takes him in soapy arms, running the foam up his sides as he holds him and pulls him in for another kiss.

“Thank you, my baby. And I’m proud of you. You shared your room with Jaemin this whole heat! Didn’t kick him out except to nest. I wouldn’t have thought that was possible last year.”

He thinks about that in comfortable quiet for a minute or two, as Mark runs shampoo through his hair. He’s right—last year, he shut the lot of them out and insisted on being alone throughout his heat. Partially because the first year had gone so badly—he thought dealing with it on his own would be more painless for everyone—and particularly because he was so conscious about his smell at the time. It was his main anxious fixation, after realising how bad it became during heat.

The changes in their pack have probably helped—the more well-balanced the pack has become, the more comfortable he’s been having mates around again. He still gets touchy where Mark, Jeno and Donghyuck are involved, but for Chenle, Jaemin, Jisung and Yangyang… he never feels uncomfortable having them around. Being mostly unaffected by mating season gives them the power of treating it like any other week, making sure everything still runs as it should. Meals are had, medication taken. Emotions are talked out instead of shouted about, mostly. It’s reassuring, to him.

Or maybe he’s just maturing, his pack at last settling into a comfortable arrangement around him. Maybe it’s just getting easier each time he experiences mating season, figuring out what he needs, and how his mates can help him meet those needs.

Renjun steps out first as Mark rinses the last of the conditioner out of his hair, the two of them towelling off together as Mark chatters about his final projects. Renjun feels comfortable. Clean.

“I’m going to start charging every time my skills are specifically requested,” Chenle is saying as he steps out of the bathroom in fresh clothes, hair damp, Mark a step behind him. “I’m serious, I’m starting to feel like someone’s implying I belong in the kitchen. Who do you think I am? Jaemin? Making you a sandwich whenever you feel like it?”

“You’re just the best cook,” Jisung says weakly from the kitchen table. “And Hyung is still in pain, so…”

“I’m not ranting at him. I’m talking about you,” he says, gesturing around the room at Mark, Jisung, and Yangyang, who is looking rather defeated at the kitchen table. “You can’t learn to cook? Renjun would totally cook if he weren’t unwell, so I don’t have a problem with him. But you guys don’t want to pull your weight around here?”

“Jisung has taken a cooking course,” Renjun says, standing behind Jisung and gently scratching at the nape of his neck. “He has a certificate and everything.”

Chenle wilts as Jisung looks up apologetically. “Really? Like, really really? What kind of teacher did you have?” He turns around, setting out a huge vat of hot pot on the table.

“She was baffled by me too,” Jisung admits, leaning in at the smell of the food. “But she was really nice.”

“Yangyang and Mark have no excuse,” Renjun says happily, pulling up a seat. “Thanks for the food, Lele.”

Chenle scoffs. “Like I’d let you starve. Which is what you would do, left alone with any of these.”

“Hey,” Mark says, regretfully going past them to get ready for his class. “I know how to… scramble an egg.”

“You can scramble it, alright.”

“And I know how to order takeout,” Yangyang says. “See? I can totally provide.”

“Sure, honey,” Renjun says, patting his arm vaguely as they pass around bowls. He’s starving. “Whatever you say.”

“You see? Whatever Renjun says,” Yangyang says, and Jisung laughs, an almost silent thing compared to Chenle’s high snickers.

Mark drops a kiss on his head before he leaves. Renjun only realises then that he’s feeling, for the first time in days—okay.

-

DAY 7

The painkillers do their job, but his sleep schedule is messed up—he sleeps late again and wakes up late the following day. It’s Friday, and the only person home is Jisung, on his second day of mating leave from classes.

They play Mario Kart together and pick up on the last drama they were watching before life got busy, binging half a season before their pack start to filter back home. Chenle first, with loud commentary about the plot as he sits and watches with them, engrossed despite not knowing the plot. Then Jeno, back from his early morning shift, exhausted enough to flop down and doze. Then Mark, miraculously home early from school for once.

With him—he smells him before he sees him—Donghyuck also comes home. He must smell Renjun right back, because he doesn’t look surprised to see him sitting out in the living room with everyone, almost back to normal.

What he does do is trill out a greeting before heading for his bedroom, leaving the four of them cuddled up together, Mark getting comfortable under his blanket (that Renjun plans to permanently appropriate even after dismantling his nest). It leaves a strange atmosphere behind him, the semi-awkward sense of two people who aren’t talking.

He still needs to make it up to Donghyuck. If Jaemin were here, he’d tell him to wait until tomorrow, when he’s officially in the clear. But Renjun knows himself well enough, and is confident his unfounded ill will towards Donghyuck has cleared, leaving him with enough clarity of mind to fix this.

If one of his mates implied to him that he wasn’t part of the pack—the only one of them not part of the pack—it would do a number on him, he’s sure. There’s not much excuse for treating him like that, especially when Renjun loves him as much as he does.

He knocks on the bedroom door, but opens it without waiting. Donghyuck turns to look at him, finally surprised to see him, and Renjun hovers nervously in the doorway. There’s a pause as they look at each other, Donghyuck waiting for him to speak first.

“Do you want to come and see the nest?” he asks quietly, not sure if this will just rub salt further into wounds. If it does, he has no one to blame but himself.

Donghyuck looks at him, eyes round, mouth slightly turned down. “Are you sure that’s okay?”

Renjun shifts uncomfortably on the spot. “I’d really like you to come and see it,” he says instead, then trails off. “If… that’s something you want.”

Donghyuck looks once to the floor, then back up at Renjun. Then he properly turns towards him, reaching a hand out to take his, and Renjun releases a breath.

“Then let’s go.”

Chenle watches them as they leave Donghyuck’s room and walk across to Renjun’s, but no one comments as he pushes into the bedroom.

Now that his heat is wearing off, he’s nearly ready to dismantle the nest, finding it overwhelming to have so many scents around him all the time. He’s also desperate to give his bedsheets a wash. But that will come tomorrow morning.

For now, he needs the approval of his omega, to know he’s done a good job for their pack.

Donghyuck hums, pleased at the sight, hand coming up to the small of Renjun’s back. “You’ve worked hard,” he says, letting Renjun take his hand and lead him over towards the bed. “It’s perfect, Renjun-ie.”

“Come on,” is all he says, pulling him until he sits back on the bed, legs tangling with the sheets as he lays back. “You have to stay for a while to be sure.”

“I have to stay?” Donghyuck asks, almost in wonder. He tilts his nose into Renjun’s shoulder, then kisses his neck. “Yep, you’re definitely still in heat. Did you bring me here to kill me?”

“Why would I do that?” he tuts in annoyance. “This is a terrible place to kill someone if you’re planning to get away with it. They all saw us come in here.”

“That’s only mildly reassuring.”

Renjun nuzzles his shoulder as he gets comfortable, avoiding looking into his face. “I talked with Chenle,” he says. “And now that I’m nearly out of heat, I feel shit about how I was acting. I was being really stupid, and I’m sorry I brought you into it.”

Donghyuck puts a hand to his head, fingers running through his hair comfortingly. “If you have insecurities and worries, you should tell us. That’s how we can fix things.”

“I know. It’s just hard to see that, sometimes. Especially on my heat—especially when I know, deep down, these things are unfounded. But I can’t stop feeling them.”

Donghyuck hums, empathetic. “I know. But still, even before your heat…”

“Don’t say I told you so,” he grumbles, hitting his arm. “I know. I should’ve held off on Yangyang moving in, like you said. You probably saw all this from the start, didn’t you? But my brain would’ve found something to become paranoid about no matter what—it would’ve been turning Yangyang down if we hadn’t said yes. I still don’t think we did the wrong thing. I was really glad to have him here yesterday.”

“He’s been thrown in at the deep end. If he survived your heat, he’s a keeper.”

“He survived both our heats,” he remarks. “You two found that okay, right? Spending your heat together?”

“Yeah. More than okay,” Donghyuck smiles. “That okay with you?”

“I’m really glad. Truly. And the others? I don’t have a good gauge on how the rest of the house has been. Was Jeno okay with having him here on his rut?”

“Course,” Donghyuck says, moving his hand down to gently stroke Renjun’s arm. “You know Jeno is fine with anything on his rut, as long as he’s getting attention. I didn’t see Mark much, but when I did he seemed okay too. I hope the exams comment I made didn’t bother you too much. I was thinking about it the whole week.”

“It’s fine,” he says quietly, thinking over the events of the week. “And you—your heat—I’m sorry I didn’t bring you in here four days ago, when you needed it. I know I make things hard between us every year. I wish I didn’t, but I always do.”

“As long as you make it up to me,” Donghyuck says, pouting his lips. Renjun goes in to kiss him without question. Just a peck, first, before he goes back in for something longer, tender.

“I’m trying to be better,” he murmurs. “Every year, I do try. My mind seems to get the better of me every time, though.”

“We’ll get there. You did improve this year, overall. Hey, maybe the two of us should share a room next year! Exposure therapy.”

“That’s a certain recipe for disaster.”

Donghyuck smiles, but doesn’t laugh. “I missed you this week. It’s kind of ridiculous when you have so many boyfriends, to really miss one of them in the same house as you, who doesn’t want to see you, but…”

“It’s not ridiculous. I missed you too.”

“No you didn’t.”

“Not at the time. But I missed missing you. It all gets wrong in my head on my heat, and I end up taking it out on everyone else.”

“I could withstand that for the whole week in return for an hour cuddling in your nest. And being able to take care of you. I was genuinely upset I couldn’t come towards the sound of your vomiting to rub your back and put you to bed at 3am. That’s how bad you’ve got me.”

That thought simultaneously melts his heart and stabs him in the gut. He knows this is his fault—Donghyuck is never the one to start ill feeling towards them, even if he can’t help but get angry at Renjun too. Renjun is the one who can’t keep his feelings under control.

“I’m sorry. At least my nest is just a deliberate mess within a tidy room. You’re not missing out on too much. The cuddles, I can make up for after.”

“Don’t downtalk your nest like that,” Donghyuck reprimands. “I wish I nested. It’s such a homely thing.”

“You wish you nested?” he can’t mask his surprise—he had no idea Donghyuck liked it that much.

“I mean, I could, I guess. I did try, one year. But I don’t get any urges for it, or any satisfaction. I just… think it’s nice. That you want to make a safe little home with everyone you love around you. And to be a part of yours is important to me.”

He traces a finger over a mole on Donghyuck’s arm, unable to look him in the eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“I know. I don’t blame you—I know you don’t do it to hurt me.”

“But if it still hurts you…”

Donghyuck kisses him to cut him off. “Then we’ll work around it again next year. Find something that works eventually, right?”

“I hope so,” he sighs, and Donghyuck reaches around to pull him closer, bodies pressed together. Renjun isn’t sleepy, but he could comfortably stay here for a while.

“For now, I’ll enjoy what you can give me.”

Renjun stays in his arms for a long while after that, wanting to give him all of himself that he can, all that Donghyuck wants and needs. All of him he’ll have.

-

Yangyang arrives home last, after Jaemin comes back, after Donghyuck and Renjun set about making dinner together to save Chenle from grumbling, right in time to sit down and eat with them. Fitting all eight of them in the kitchen is a big ask, so they split between the kitchen and the living room, Renjun seated comfortably between Donghyuck and Yangyang on the sofa while the rest of them eat around the kitchen table.

Yangyang has been beaming brightly since arriving home and finding Renjun and Donghyuck on good terms again. If he were an alpha, Renjun would assume he were releasing pheromones—but no, his wide smile is just that contagious, keeping them all giggling and happy, elbows knocking against elbows and thighs pressed against thighs.

Jaemin comes in to share out the side dishes with them, and Renjun finds it funny for no real reason, which makes Jaemin grin with him at absolutely nothing.

“It’s good to see you happy again,” he says, popping some pickled radish into Donghyuck’s mouth like a parent feeding a small child. “You guys are doing okay?”

“We’re dazzling, baby,” Donghyuck responds, radish down in one.

“Thank you for looking after me this week, Jaemin,” he says, suddenly placing his bowl down on the table to stand and hug Jaemin. “You’ve been amazing, seriously.”

“Aw,” Jaemin says softly, holding Renjun gently. “I try.”

“You did well with all of us, if the sounds I heard from Jeno’s room were any indication,” Donghyuck says, and Yangyang scrunches up his face, half-repulsed, half-amused.

“I did,” Jaemin grins, and leans out of the hug to cup Renjun’s face. “But you did the best of us.”

“I don’t believe that for a second.”

“You’re the most improved, then. My favourite patient.”

“Sure,” Renjun says, as Donghyuck says,

“Don’t let Jeno hear you’re playing favourites. He’ll be moping for the whole weekend.”

“He’s my other favourite,” Jaemin says, flicking Donghyuck’s head. “You’re my un-favourite.”

“What does that even mean? Hey!”

“It actually wasn’t as bad as I was expecting,” Yangyang says as Renjun sits back down with his food.

“Really?”

“Sure. I guess I didn’t really see you that much—like, if I’d been your only partner, I don’t know if I could’ve looked after you well the whole time. But the pack—like, everyone works well together. Right? Everyone played a little part. And from the sounds of it, that made things go pretty well.”

“Yeah,” he says, something fond blooming in his heart. “I’m so lucky to have you guys. This pack—this is right where I’m meant to be. You’re just right for me.”

Yangyang leans in to kiss him, and Renjun shifts to accept it comfortably. It makes him realise Donghyuck had left the room with Jaemin—and as he pulls away, the lights in the room switch off.

“Happy birthday to you…” a chorus of voices start, and a floating cake appears in the dark doorway, lit candles atop it showing Donghyuck carrying the cake into the room carefully.

When he starts to sing, his voice carries above everyone else’s—“Happy birthday to you!”

But the rest are all there anyway, coming into the room behind him. “Happy birthday to Yangyang…”

All the rest of his pack—even though they’re not dating Yangyang—had made the effort, with party poppers and streamers and party hats, one of which is popped over his head from behind. “Happy birthday to you!”

“You got me a cake?” is the first thing Yangyang says after blowing the candles out.

“Do you not even go in the fridge?” Chenle asks. “It’s been there for like, three days.”

“This was the box in the fridge?” Yangyang asks, voice increasingly higher pitched, like he’s amazed at their cake-buying and hiding skills.

“It’s nothing too special,” Jeno starts uncertainly, but Yangyang cuts him off.

“What? I’m so surprised! When did you have time to get me a cake? Thank you, seriously! I thought if Renjun didn’t have time to plan it, no one would.”

“Hey,” Donghyuck says. “How dare you!”

“He is right, though, you didn’t plan anything,” Mark points out, and Donghyuck turns on him, hands on hips.

“They’re good, aren’t they?” Renjun says, eyes smiling. “Happy belated birthday, baby. I’m sorry we didn’t do something proper.”

“We are doing something proper,” Donghyuck interjects, hands still on hips as he turns back to Renjun. “Kun, Ten and Johnny are meeting us in the park tomorrow. They’re bringing Haeun on a day trip out to celebrate.”

“Oh,” Renjun says, fond smile growing. He’s missed her so much. “Really?”

“It’s a present for Yangyang, not you, baby,” Donghyuck teases.

“Do we all get to meet her?” Jisung asks with a surprised head tilt.

“Of course. You guys are my pack now.” Yangyang’s voice only wavers slightly when he says it, and Renjun leans in to kiss his cheek.

“Yes, we are. I can’t wait for you guys to meet Haeun.”

“Can we please cut the cake?” Chenle whines, jumping up and down on the spot. “Please? I’ve been looking at it all week.”

“Let’s cut the cake,” Jaemin says, producing a knife out of nowhere. “I thought you’d be up for a slice tonight, Renjun—I hope I’m right?”

“I’m getting the second slice after the birthday boy. It looks so good,” he says, inching closer as Jaemin passes the knife to Yangyang.

Chenle whines and groans, and Yangyang goes soft enough to pass him the second slice. Renjun doesn’t mind as much as he pretends to—it reminds him of Jaemin’s cake last year, the way he and Chenle had both struggled and their packmates had struggled in return, Jaemin their only beta at the time.

This year was different. Like Mark said, despite everything, it was better. Perhaps next year, they stand a chance of making something almost normal.

He gets his slice of cake and takes a bite. He even eats it, too.