Chapter Text
Karkat stares at himself in the mirror, dissatisfied with what he sees. He has too much hip. Too much chest. Too much ass. Too much, too much, too much. Even with all of these hormones, those things remain constant. He’s gained masculine facial features, which is really all he needs, considering his shirt hides mostly everything else. No one on the comet knows but Kanaya and Nepeta. Kanaya because, well, she’s Kanaya. She would have guessed anyway. Nepeta because Karkat didn’t have a binder and she had plenty. Having no boobs helped her keep herself balanced while she hunted. It doesn't matter much that Nepeta knows now, considering she’s dead.
Speaking of binders, Karkat has worn his too long today; about 10 hours. He didn't put it back on after his shower but has gotten completely dressed otherwise. He has all of his shots in his room because he doesn’t want anyone else to see them. Today is a shot day. He’d better get a move on.
He peeks out into the hall to make sure no one else is walking around before stepping out. He doesn’t want anyone to see his boobs, even if they have shrunk with all of the testosterone. He doesn’t see anyone, so he hurries down the hall. His hand is on the doorknob when Kanaya calls out his name from the end of the hallway. She hurries over to him and says, “Did you remember your shot today?”
Karkat lets her know the he was about to shoot himself up when she stopped him. She beams at him and nods before walking away.
He locks the door once he’s inside. Nobody gets to see him stab himself in the ass with a needle but himself. He gets everything ready carefully and pulls down the back of his pants. In goes the needle with the hormones, and out goes the needle into the trash. The ugly, bright red blood beads up on his skin, and he quickly blots it with a tissue. Karkat sighs; of all of the blood colors, he had to get bright in-your-face red. Fucking terrible.
Once everything else is taken care of, the pants come off and Karkat climbs into the human beds that everyone is forced to sleep on because of Gamzee. They’re not too uncomfortable if there are plenty of pillows and blankets, which Karkat has. He demanded them, dammit! A leader has to be comfortable, no matter how shitty of a leader they may be. After a few short moments, he is fast asleep in that rickety old human bed.
•••••••••••••
The next day, everyone is much too busy to talk to Karkat. He’s okay with it really; it doesn’t offend him at all. Talking has never been his forte, he gets anxious and just rants off on tangents that everyone laughs at, even if he happens to be serious about what he’s saying. Nobody really bothers to listen to him at all unless he keeps his cool and talks like a sensible person.
For the most part, Karkat just sat on the couch in the common room and read books. Her Pale Fantasies is one he is currently into. She’s so scandalous! Dave distracted Karkat for about two seconds before Terezi dragged him off to cantown to hang out with the Mayor.
What an incredibly dull day.
Once Karkat feels himself edging on tired, he makes his way to the bathroom to shower and get ready for bed. Karkat has never really cared for nudity and only undresses himself when he’s getting ready for the day, night, or showering. He examines his naked body in the mirror. The scar that jack gave him on his stomach is prominent against otherwise average skin. There are two self harm marks on his inner wrist from a time when he tired relieving himself of stress in that way. The color of his blood just gave him more anxiety than he had before. Overall a useless tactic. The pain didn’t help much either, it just made him feel worse. It was a terrible experience and he would not recommend it to anyone at all.
Karkat turns on the water and waits for it to get warm before hopping in and washing up. After, he dries off quickly and puts on his shirt and boxers. He again checks down the hall to see if anyone is coming. Safe. He hurries down the hall and is just about to his door when Dave stops him by walking up with a lazy, “Hey, Karkles. You wanna hang out later?” Karkat can only stammer a bit, not getting real words out as Dave’s head tilts down to look at Karkat’s chest. Shit shit shit. Dave’s head shoots up, “Whoa- you have?”
That is all Karkat hears before he pushes past Dave and hurries to his room, locking the door and crawling onto his bed. He can’t stop the tears of embarrassment from flowing down his cheeks. Oh God, Dave is going to tell everyone! His phone chirps and he reaches over to see who it is, blinking away his tears. It’s Dave. The message reads: "bro youre not the only one."