Chapter Text
Alright, let’s do this one last time.
My name is Lottie Matthews, I was bitten by a radioactive spider and for 2 years, I've been the one and only Spider-woman. You guys know the rest. I joined a football team, reluctantly saved my dad… but I couldn't save my best friend, Laura Lee. So, now I save everyone else. I distanced myself from the team… just to avoid any sort of distraction.
Don’t get me wrong, I love being Spider-woman. It’s empowering and I’m on cereal boxes!! It’s so weird to pour my cereal in the morning and just see my face on it- well, my masked face on it. The point is, being Spider-woman is lonely. I see my parents once a week, most of the time once a month, and whenever I do see them they complain like my dad would be alive without her!! Like he would be alive without me. But I sit silently and say nothing, I know they don’t actually want my opinion, they just want me to agree or shut up. Being Spider-woman can get… lonely in the vaguest terms. But I couldn't get close to anyone and I definitely couldn’t tell them, for their own safety. I can’t lose another close friend, not again.
I get up at my usual time, 6am, and sit up. I immediately regret it though, my body is unbelievably sore from last night. I had a rough fight with these gang members with guns and all sorts of crap. I may be Spider-woman but I'm still human… I think. I also only got around 3 hours of sleep due to the fight so I just took some paracetamol to ease my head and get changed. I reluctantly put my football uniform into my bag, I enjoyed going but I had bigger responsibilities. Not responsibilities I could tell anyone about but responsibilities none the less.
A few hours later, I was in school. I could barely concentrate. The pain in my body and the drowsiness of 3 hours of sleep was hitting me like a bus. I was desperately trying to listen to whatever my English teacher was saying but failed. I fell asleep, she had to wake me up 3 times before she sent me to the councillors office. She was a nice teacher, one of the only ones who understood mental health struggles and listened to my small rants after Laura Lee died. But of course, she didn’t know I was the reason Laura Lee was dead. I tried to get up normally and sneak out of the classroom without everyone staring at me but it was pretty much impossible. I'm tall and the way I awkwardly tried to make it look like I wasn't in pain failed. I walked through the quiet hallways, completely zoned out, until I heard someone speak to me.
“Has Lottie Matthews turned into a rebel?”
I turned my head to see who it was and looked down slightly to see Natalie Scatorccio. She was in her usual style of clothes, a few bruises littered across her exposed skin from all the fights I saw her in. I assume that at least. She was leaning against the wall right outside Mr Smith's maths class. She wasn’t extremely small but I still had to look down to make eye contact, even with her platformed boots on. I shook my head as I stopped walking.
“No, got sent to the councillors office”
“What for??”
Nat had always been pretty nosey, always wanting to see what others were doing and why. I’m not saying it’s bad, I really don't mind. I kind of like when people are so interested in what I'm up to, it makes me feel unnecessarily special.
“I kept falling asleep in English”
Nat let out a small and very dramatic gasp.
“Lottie Matthews falling asleep in such an important subject like English?”
I let out a small giggle, besides Laura Lee, Nat was probably one of the people I was closest to on the team. Despite her tough and slightly bitchy front she puts up, she can be really nice. Though, I think I’m one of the only ones who actually gets along with Nat. Jackie and Nat but head a lot due to Nat’s “rebellious” attitude but the person that doesn’t get along with Nat the most is 100% Tai. Tai and Nat had been bitter towards each other since they first met, they never got along- like ever. When I asked both sides, they both just ended up complaining about the other so I'm pretty sure they have no clue why they hate each other.
“I know, i’m a criminal in the making”
Nat laughed, I liked making Nat laugh, it felt like some sort of achievement but i couldn't really tell you why. She swayed on her feet a bit as she did so, arms still folded over her chest. After she finished laughing, she was quiet for a bit, like she was contemplating saying something.
“You coming to practise today?”
I sighed a bit, messing with my jacket sleeve.
“If I can keep myself awake, I don’t think anyone would be happy if I missed another session.”
Nat smiled a bit and nodded.
“Yeah, I get it, Jackie always looks like she wants to rip my head off when I'm even a minute late, may as well skipping.”
I smiled at her, going to say something else before Mr Smith came outside.
“You shouldn’t be hanging out in the hallways Miss Matthews, go to where you need to be please.”
I mumbled an apology and saw Nat wave a little as I walked off. I overheard Mr Smith yelling at Nat and her yelling back, I genuinely don’t think she knows when to stop. In every class we have together, she argues back. It’s not even like she’s stupid, she’s actually pretty smart- she just doesn’t listen in or do anything in lessons, like she’s given up on herself. It makes me kind of sad, Nat’s a great person- to some extent- and it’s upsetting to just watch her throw her life away, though I can’t say anything I guess.
I went to the councillors office, told the same old story and had the same old conversation about grief, Laura Lee, my absent parents, exam stress . A bunch of stuff I’d heard a million times before and didn’t need to hear again. I politely left as soon as the bell went, I was so excited to eat. I was starving, I was rushing through the hallways. Trying to get to the lunch hall as quickly as possible until my spidey senses went off. I mentally cursed and went back in the opposite direction, towards where I sensed the danger. You don’t need the details, I suited up, fought some bad guys and quickly rushed back into school. I was late to the lesson, of course. Having to hide the bruises I had gained from the fight was difficult but I was pretty used to it so it didn’t take me as long as it would’ve a year ago. I shoved my suit into my bag and took some more paracetamol, just quickly putting the box over the suit before running to class.
Shock horror, I got detention. I fell asleep again and my French teacher is not as understanding as my English teacher. I got a half an hour detention and quickly rushed to practise, I got changed shockingly fast (for obvious reasons) and ran out to where everyone was. Anxiety rose in my body as all of their eyes were on me.
“I had detention- I’m sorry-”
Everyones reactions were… very different to say the least. I either got glares or sympathetic looks. Coach pulled me to the side while the others continued playing.
“I know how hard- everythings been for you Lottie. I understand if you need a longer bre-”
“I’m fine, I really am. I just got detention, I can play.”
Coach nodded and we went back over to everyone and started playing. I ignored the exhaustion flooding my body, I had too. I couldn’t let them down. After another half hour, we were finished and went to get changed. I sat on the bench for a minute, trying to breathe as my body was giving up on me. I’d pushed myself way too hard all day and now it’s finally catching up to me. I felt a hand on my shoulder, I looked over and my body went cold. Laura Lee was next to me, face pale as blood ran down her mouth. Smiling at me like she always used to.
“Lottie?”
I shook my head and rubbed my eyes, seeing Jackie next to me.
“Sorry, what?”
“I asked if you were okay, you look a bit out of it”
Jackie’s face was concerned, I could tell she was disappointed in me earlier but right now she’s ignoring that. Which i appreciate.
“I’m okay- just a bit tired”
“Don’t know how you could be so tired, missing half of practise”
I looked over to who made the comment, it was Tai. She had always been pretty strict and slightly petty with people missing or not taking practice seriously, that's mainly why her and Nat bicker so much. Guilt joined my exhaustion and I couldn’t bring myself to say anything.
“Leave her alone, Tai.”
I looked over again and it was Nat, glaring at Tai while putting her shirt on.
“Oh i’m sorry, does the burn out have something to say?”
Nat rolled her eyes.
“Just shut up and stop being such a bitch for once in your fucking life.”
Everything went kinda blurry but I could faintly argue before Jackie got annoyed and stepped in. She shot them both down and I saw Tai walk off with Van while Nat was looking over at me. I could feel how much of a mess I looked, It was unbelievably embarrassing.
“Let’s get you home Lottie-”
Jackie helped me up, Shauna came over to help.
“I can take her home, I’ve got nothing else to do and I heard you two talking about needing to study so”
“Aren’t you going to study as well??”
Nat gave Shauna a look and she nodded, the message of Natalie Scatorccio does not study, like- ever. Jackie gave Nat a lecture, not to do anything dumb and make sure I actually get home safe. Nat looked uninterested, I’m hoping Nat doesn’t have any murderous intentions. For one, I’m exhausted. Two, that would honestly just suck in general.
Nat helped me walk, babbling on as we went. I honestly didn’t mind, I liked listening, I just didn’t have the energy to show it. Eventually we got back to my house, I gave her the key and she unlocked the door. She helped me inside and looked mind blown.
“Jesus christ Lottie- when they said you were rich i didn't think they meant rich”
I laughed a little at the comment and the look on her face. She eventually snapped out of it and helped me upstairs. I'm pretty sure she’s noticed a few of my bruises but I honestly don't care. She helped me into bed, I only just realised how tense she had been. I assume it’s just because she's weird about physical contact. The amount of times I've seen her completely tense up and go to hit Misty when she “surprise hugs” Nat is crazy. My head really hurts again, I check the time… it’s a little under the time I'm allowed to take paracetamol but exhausted or not, I won’t be able to sleep without it.
“Hey Nat?”
My voice sounds a mix of groggy and floaty. Nat looked straight over at me, I could tell she was looking around my room while I was getting comfortable. As I said earlier, she's nosy. I know she wouldn’t steal anything, and even if she did, she probably needs it more than I do anyways.
“In my bag, I have a box of paracetamol, could you pass me it?”
Nat nods and goes over to my bag that I dumped on my chair once I entered the room. She unzips the bag and pauses for a second, her face looks confused for a second but I don't notice it straight away. My spidey senses are faintly alarming me but I'm too exhausted to figure it out straight away. We both look at each other at the same time, making eye contact.
“Lottie, are you fucking Spider-woman?!”
I knew I should've put the paracetamol in the front pocket.