Archive of Our Own

“Craig! Craig! Are you even listening to me?”

The prince just rolled his eyes as he moved his food around his plate with his fork. In an entirely un-princelike manner, Craig had an elbow on the table as he lazily rested his cheek in the palm of his hand. Every now and then, he would take a pea off of his plate and feed it to his pet guinea pig, Stripe. He had been doing his best to tune out his parents since dinner began, but they were adamant about talking his ear off until he felt that it may bleed.

“Yes,” (a lie) he eventually sighed in annoyance before leaning back in his seat and looking up at the ceiling. Since birth, he’d been taught by every advisor and tutor that it was customary to look into one’s eyes during a conversation, but Craig had never been great at that. It was a fact that angered his father to no end.

“Craig, listen to your father. And no pets on the table!” Queen Laura growled, causing Craig to frown at her as he moved Stripe to his lap. He resisted the urge to tell her that Stripe was a friend, not a pet.

His father had been bugging him about finding a wife for years now, inviting dozens upon dozens of princesses to the castle and having them meet Craig. Not a single one ever caught his eye or was interesting to talk to. Every single one of them greeted him the exact same way: a curtsy, a polite smile, and staring up at him with big eyes, hoping to ensnare his interest and become the object of his affection. Then they would say their name, Craig would immediately forget it, and he’d tell them that he wasn’t the least bit interested in them.

Their reactions always annoyed Craig. Sometimes, they would become emotional and start to cry in front of him. This was particularly irritating because the prince was left to awkwardly sit there while they sobbed and told him how he had hurt them. It’s not like Craig wanted to hurt anyone—he was simply honest.

Other times, they would become angry and slap him or tell him that he’d die alone. This was a little more amusing to Craig.

He had talked further with some princesses in the past. His father, Thomas, would “suggest” (though, Craig understood it as a demand) that Craig show them around the garden outside. Craig would do so, and the princesses would always start talking about other things, like their hobbies and interests. It was almost comical how obviously they tried to impress him, saying things like sewing, cooking, and the like. Craig knew he should have been enamored by their femininity, the things that no doubt made them the perfect wife. But he never was.

It was especially funny how much they despised his pet. One time, Stripe jumped from Craig’s shoulder onto one of the princesses that he was talking to, and she started screaming and begging for Craig to get the “rat” off of her. It was the first time that any of the women Craig met had actually made him laugh. Unfortunately, his father chewed him out for it later that day.

Stripe was tucked in Craig’s bag always. His parents constantly berated him about how he should keep the guinea pig in a cage, but Craig knew that Stripe would much prefer to see the outside with him. He’d let the animal run along the halls of the castle or walk along the flowers in the garden.

Craig knew how it felt to be trapped in a cage. As much as he wanted to go and explore the world, his parents never let him leave the castle. He had too many “princely duties” to attend to, as they said.

“As I was saying,” King Thomas continued, ripping Craig from his thoughts, “I expect that you will find someone to rule by your side at the ball. Do I make myself clear?”

“But Your Majesty,” Craig replied flatly, “you know I have no interest in—”

“Do I make myself clear?” Thomas repeated, firmer this time. For a moment, Craig's confidence faltered, but he soon felt his lips press into a thin line.

“I said no!” he yelled childishly, much louder than he meant to. At the same time, he stood up and slammed his hands on the table, causing his glass of wine to tip over and splash over his shirt and pants. Stripe let out a squeak as she jumped off of his shoulder and into Craig’s bag. His mother and sister’s eyes widened as his father crossed his arms angrily.

“Look what you did!” Thomas roared as he also shot up and slammed his hands down. Laura stood up with a sigh and put a comforting hand on her husband’s shoulder but he shrugged it off. “To think you’ll rule this kingdom one day! You’re hardly fit to be a prince! Go wash that off now.”

“Dad—!”

“Now!”

The prince grit his teeth before he slung his satchel over his shoulder and angrily stormed down the hall, sending a middle finger to his family on the way out. His king returned the gesture to Craig’s back before he turned.

“Clyde,” he called to the advisor. The brunet looked at him expectantly. “Go make sure he gets that shit off.”

The advisor nodded before he also turned around to follow Craig down the hall, smirking to himself when the king couldn’t see.

Thomas then sighed as he slowly lowered himself back into his chair and ran his hands through his red hair.

“What am I going to do with him, Laura?” he asked quietly.

The queen ran a comforting hand down her husband’s back. “You know how he gets, Thomas… I’m sure he’ll come around.”

“Craig!” Clyde yelled as he raced after the prince. Craig heard his name being called but didn’t turn around. He only stopped when he felt Clyde’s familiar hand on his shoulder.

“What?” Craig spat as he spun to face the man. The advisor had a devious smile on his face as he let out a snort.

“More problems with Daddy?” he mocked. Craig rolled his eyes before punching Clyde in the arm, causing the brunet to let out a groan.

“Come on, I’ll run you a bath,” Clyde said as he rubbed his arm and dragged Craig into the bathroom. Then he pathetically whined, “Ow… That really hurt, you know.”

Clyde could only act like this when the two were alone. Despite being entrusted to watch over Craig and make sure the prince didn’t get into any trouble, the two of them had formed a friendship over the years. Clyde was the only one who Craig could talk to about his problems, and sometimes not even then.

For example, right now. As he heated the water in a cauldron, he continued, “I still don’t understand what’s so upsetting to you about living in a castle and ruling over a kingdom. I’d give anything to be that powerful.”

And that is where the two of them differed. While Craig saw his fate as a curse, Clyde saw it as a blessing. Clyde never understood how powerless Craig actually felt, being forced into a life that he didn’t choose, especially considering that Craig didn’t even want the duty he was going to be given. He hated the idea of being responsible for the well-being of thousands of people, stuck forever on a throne, never getting to explore the outside world.

Of course, Clyde was one of the laziest people that Craig knew, so it made sense why he loved the idea of sitting on his ass all day and ordering people around.

When the water was ready, Clyde used buckets to transfer the warm water into the large tub. Craig could do this himself, but his father insisted that he “get used to the lifestyle of a king.” Apparently, this meant not lifting a finger to take care of yourself.

Clyde stretched his back when he was done as he looked at Craig. The prince was gazing longingly out the window as he looked at the people moving around the village. The castle was so tall and far away that he could barely make out their dots walking from place to place. They looked like ants from here, and the thought only made Craig feel even lonlier.

“Uh, you’re not thinking of jumping out the window, are you?” Clyde asked nervously. He said it like a joke, but there was a hint of truth to it. Again, Craig rolled his eyes as he turned back to his friend.

“No, I’m waiting for you to leave,” he replied as he started unbuttoning his top. He raised a brow at Clyde. “Unless you want to watch me undress, that is.”

Clyde made a disgusted face as he shook his head. “Yuck. Listen, I’ll be back in a while with some new clothes. Just get in already.” With that, he left the room, the door shutting with a thump.

Craig walked up to the door and pressed his ear against it, listening to Clyde’s footsteps fading away as he marched down the hallway. The prince smirked to himself before he buttoned his stained shirt back up and kneeled on the ground next to his satchel. He slowly took out Stripe and set her on the floor, pulling out a large brown cloak from the bottom of his bag. He wrapped it around his shoulders and pulled the hood over his head, hiding his face.

He picked Stripe up and brought his hands up to his face, looking into her small, black eyes with a smile.

“Come on, Stripe. This is our only chance to get out of here, even for just a little bit.” He gently placed her inside his bag, taking off his white gloves (which were more purple now, having also fallen victim to the splashback of Craig’s wine) and letting her use them as a cushion so she didn’t move around too much.

He opened the door of the bathroom and peeked out, making sure the coast was clear. Then Craig hugged his hood tighter to his head before making a beeline down the hall. Without his expensive suit and recognizable face visible, he looked like any other commoner making their way throughout the castle. In fact, with his bag, he looked like a simple courier making a delivery to someone in the castle.

He moved quickly, knowing Clyde would be sending search parties after him the second he realized Craig wasn’t in the bath. As a result, it wasn’t long before Craig was making his way out the large front gates of the castle and walking to the village down the hill. A few guards gave him strange looks but otherwise didn’t press. Walking out of the castle was much easier than walking in for most people. Of course, if the guards knew that it was the prince walking past them, they would immediately stop him. That was why Craig had prepared the cloak to shield his face in advance.

The second that he was out of view, Craig took Stripe out of his bag and placed her back on his shoulder, hearing her let out a pleased squeak as the two of them entered the village. Immediately, Craig noticed how much different it was.

He’d been to the village a few times, mainly when his father would come to make some speech about a new law or tax raise. During those few times, he was seated safely in a carriage, guards lined up and down the street to make sure that nobody got close to him. He’d never been so low, his face no higher than anyone else’s. He felt like one of the villagers and the thought was exhilarating.

It was also much busier than the castle. Inside there, it was quiet and calm, everyone afraid to so much as drop a pin on the floor, lest they disturb the peace. Here, everyone was yelling to each other, laughing, drinking, and doing everything in the square. It was colorful and bright and Craig soaked up every second of it.

“What should we do first?” he asked his companion. Stripe, of course, didn’t say anything, but Craig could tell the bustling from the village was exciting her. She squeaked happily on his shoulder, and Craig pulled the pocket of his shirt wider so she could jump inside. After a moment, her head popped over the top, making Craig laugh.

In his glee, he hadn’t noticed people trying to move around him, as he was blocking the path to a long alley. Suddenly, someone shoved Craig to the side, almost making him lose his footing.

“Hey, watch where you’re going, dumbass!” a large, burly man shouted. Craig frowned.

“Excuse me?” he asked. Nobody had ever talked to him like that before.

The man leaned in, his husky scent filling Craig’s nose, and he resisted the urge to gag. “Stay the fuck out of my way.”

“Do you know who you’re speaking to?” Craig growled as he crossed his arms. The man mirrored his posture.

“Who would that be?” the giant asked mockingly.

The prince opened his mouth to answer “Prince Craig of South Park!” but he immediately closed it again. He couldn’t say that—he was trying to keep a low profile!

“Um, nobody,” he muttered quietly as he shrank back in his cloak. The man laughed condescendingly and Craig had to resist the urge to punch him in the throat. Instead, he turned around and walked away with a sour taste in his mouth. Was everyone this rude?

Still, it was better than having everyone kissing your feet constantly. This was the first real interaction that Craig had ever had outside of talking to Clyde. His servants, the princesses, everyone talked to him so… fakely. Like they were afraid they might say something and mess up.

Granted, Craig could likely have them executed at the drop of a hat. But still.

“Well that sucked,” he told Stripe. Craig had plenty of lessons in self-defense, and he thought he might stand a chance of taking on the large man from earlier, but he didn’t want his hood to fall down and have anyone recognize him. It was the price to pay for a small taste of freedom.

“What should we do now?” Craig asked eagerly, even though he knew Stripe couldn’t understand him. (Although, sometimes it felt like she could.) He knew that the guards would come looking for him any second now, and he wanted to make the most of his time outside of the castle walls. He wanted to hit up every single shop, restaurant, or brewery he could find.

Without thinking, he stepped into the first shop that he saw and immediately regretted it when he saw shelves upon shelves of books lining the walls. The last thing Craig wanted to do was study.

He almost turned around to leave before something else caught his eye. It was a small section in the back with a telescope that looked out the window. It was wooden with two pieces of glass on each side, magnifying the view.

Craig always wanted a telescope, but he’d never been able to have one, despite being a prince. Interested, he approached closer and saw a few books that had etchings of different stars and planets on the covers. Instantly, he was enamored.

Craig had always loved space, even as a child. He used to read books willingly when he found them in the castle’s library. Even now, he would spend hours upon hours studying looking out his window at night, studying the stars and the way they moved, the different formations that appeared on the black canvas of the sky.

Of course, his father stopped letting him read such books as he got older in favor of reading about politics and royalty and everything that Craig didn’t care about.

Excitedly, he began ripping books upon books off the shelves, flipping through them eagerly and scanning the words as fast as possible. Maybe a little too eagerly.

“Could you be a little more gentle with the merchandise?’ a voice asked behind him, causing Craig to jump.

His eyebrows knitted together angrily as he turned to face the mystery person. “Can you fucking warn me before you suddenly—” The prince blinked stupidly as he saw the man who had interrupted his reading.

He wore a bright green shirt and brown pants. The man also had an apron, for whatever reason, probably some sort of uniform.

He was also shorter than Craig by maybe four inches. (Which wasn’t a surprise, considering Craig had inherited his father’s height.) He had bright, spiky blond hair that was disheveled in every sense of the word. The tufts stuck out in random directions and reminded Craig of a sunflower.

The man was also shaking slightly, but he didn’t seem afraid. His head jerked at random times and his eyes squinted shut in a way that almost made Craig laugh. The blond had his arms crossed in annoyance but his nails were digging into his arms, almost instinctively. The man was either ill or just plain weird, and Craig figured it was the latter.

However, what really caught Craig by surprise were the man’s eyes. When they weren’t shut from his twitching, they were big and deep blue, staring up at Craig in irritation. After a second of staring into the man’s irises, Craig gulped before he shifted his gaze away and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Greetings,” he replied, cursing the way his voice shook. Why was his voice shaking?

The blond frowned. Before he responded, he let out a series of strange noises that made Craig raise a brow.

“Hng. Ack! Greetings? C-Can you please be more careful with that book please?” he repeated before letting out more noises. Craig coughed awkwardly.

“Er… Yes. Sorry.” It was the first time in years he felt the need to apologize to someone. Usually, he was the one receiving apologies and begging for forgiveness.

“It’s fine,” the man mumbled, glancing curiously at Craig’s hood. He tried to bend down to look at Craig’s face, but the prince ducked his head down to shield it. The blond frowned further before tapping his fingers on his arm.

“Are you going to buy that?” he asked suddenly, pointing to the book that Craig was holding. Craig, who had forgotten where he was and what he was doing, looked at the book like he’d never seen it before. He sputtered awkwardly.

“N-No. Sorry,” he apologized again before sliding the book back into its place. “Just looking.”

The blond rolled his eyes.

“Y-You don’t have to apologize, dude.” Then his gaze fell to the floor and he suddenly scrunched his face. “Ugh, is that a rat?”

Craig’s hand immediately flew to the pocket of his shirt, noticing it was empty. He snapped his head down the see Stripe crawling on the floor, chewing on a piece of paper that had probably been ripped out of a book and discarded carelessly on the ground. He watched in horror as the blond leaned down and reached out toward her.

“Wait, don’t hurt her!” Craig cried as he reached out to stop the blond. However, his fingers soon paused. He was expecting the man to step on her, squeeze her, or throw her out the window, mistaking her for an unwelcome rodent.

Instead, he watched as the man ignored Craig and gently picked Stripe up, looking at her curiously. For the first time, his twitching ceased as he focused on Stripe.

“Mm! Not a rat. What are you?’ he muttered as he took his thumb and gently ran it back and forth over her head. The guinea pig immediately relaxed and closed her eyes, breathing deeply at the soft touch. Craig also found himself sighing in relief as his shoulders fell.

“She’s a guinea pig,” Craig answered, even though the question wasn’t towards him. The blond blinked like he forgot that Craig existed before tilting his head.

“Huh? A guinea pig?” he asked, taking another look at the creature. Craig was pleased when he saw the man’s amazement. “I’ve never heard of that.”

Then the blond’s posture stiffened as he suddenly started shaking again. “Oh god! Is she poisonous?”

“What? No,” Craig replied with a perplexed look. The man let out a relieved breath as he started petting Stripe again, this time scratching her chin with his pointer finger. Though his nails were untrimmed and pointy, she seemed to enjoy his touch.

“She’s from Peru.”

“Peru?” the man repeated. “That’s quite a ways away. She must’ve been very expensive.”

Craig shrugged. “Not really. A couple thousand gold.”

The man’s eyes widened as he suddenly sputtered and shoved Stripe into Craig’s hands. “Holy shit! I’m sorry!”

“You can hold her,” Craig insisted with a frown, holding Stripe out to him again. The man shook his head furiously as he stepped back, almost like he was afraid.

“No way! I can’t repay you if something happens to it!”

The prince rolled his eyes. “She’s tough. Besides, it’s not often that she gets along with people other than me.”

This was true. Stripe usually didn’t let anyone besides Craig hold her. Despite knowing Clyde for a couple of years now, Stripe wouldn’t even let him pet her. She would bite him every time, sometimes even drawing blood. Craig loved it when that happened because Clyde would start crying like a baby and Craig could laugh at him.

The blond narrowed his eyes in suspicion before he slowly reached out and took hold of Stripe again.

“What’s her name?” the man asked, listening in awe as the guinea pig squeaked. Craig felt a sense of pride as he watched the man become so impressed by his animal. It was the first time someone had been interested in her.

“Stripe,” Craig replied proudly.

The blond watched in amazement as Stripe crawled up his arm and perched herself on his shoulder. Then Craig watched as Stripe curled into Tweek’s neck, nuzzling it with her nose. Craig couldn’t help but wonder if Stripe had done that on purpose to play a trick on Craig, because he felt himself suck in a breath when the blond man suddenly let out a laugh at the way Stripe’s small nose tickled his neck.

The sound was better than anything Craig had heard in his life. Every piece played by court musicians and every song sung by choirs composed of the best singers in the kingdom paled in comparison to the noise coming out of this man.

It was, objectively, a stupid laugh. It was an obnoxiously loud giggle accompanied by small snorts, similar to the tics he had voiced earlier. There had been a princess that Craig had talked to once with a similar laugh, and he remembered thinking it sounded like a fork scraping against a plate at dinner; however, it sounded much better coming out of this random commoner than anyone else he’d met.

The sight itself was great too, the man smiling happily at Craig’s best friend with a warm tint to his cheeks. The sunlight came in from the window and cast a yellow ray across the man’s face that made his eyes even brighter and his skin seem even softer. Despite his weird hair, his strange movements, and his poorly cared-for teeth, the blond looked incredibly handsome. In fact, he looked much prettier than any princess Craig had met in his life, and the prince felt his cheeks getting somewhat hot as he watched the man reach up to pet Stripe again.

“She’s cute,” the man said before slowly lifting her off of his shoulder and placing her in Craig’s hands again. His warm skin brushed against Craig’s. “Ngh. Normally, we don’t allow animals, but I’ll make an exception.”

The blond turned around, probably to go sort books or something, but Craig had a weird sinking feeling as if he’d never see him again. He knew it was stupid and that the guy would be in the same building, but he still reached out to grab his shoulder and stop him from leaving.

When the man turned around, Craig stared blankly, realizing he hadn’t planned on what to say.

“What’s, uh…. What’s your name?” he asked.

Good one, Craig. All those lonely years in the castle had definitely taken a toll on his social skills.

“Oh! It’s Tweek,” the man said with another loud tic—something akin to a snort. He looked down as if he was embarrassed. “Sorry, I’m supposed to introduce myself first. My dad always gets onto me about that.”

So his name was Tweek. It was a weird name, no doubt, but it fit him perfectly. An odd name for an odd man.

“It’s fine…” Craig replied awkwardly. There was a moment of silence before ‘Tweek’ spoke again.

“And you?” he asked, causing Craig to tilt his head. Even though he couldn’t see his face, Tweek sensed his confusion and let out a ‘pfft’ like Craig was stupid. Maybe he was. “Your name?”

“Oh.” His response was flat. Funnily enough, he hadn’t expected Tweek to ask him his name in return. He bit his lip, wondering what to do. Was it safe to use his real name? Surely he wasn’t the only Craig in the kingdom, right? And if he hid his face, there’s no way that Tweek could make the connection.

“It’s… Craig,” he replied hesitantly. Tweek looked at him for a moment, making Craig freeze, until he hummed.

“That’s a pretty unusual name. Isn’t that the name of the prince?” he replied, causing Craig to sweat.

“Really? Um, I thought it was pretty common.” He ignored Tweek’s question and decided to change the subject before the blond could prod any further. “And that’s pretty ironic coming from someone named ‘Tweek.’”

That made Tweek’s shoulders deflate as he sighed and let out another involuntary twitch. “Ugh. Yeah, I know. Blame my parents for that. I wish I could change it.”

“Why?” Craig asked genuinely. “It suits you.”

That made Tweek scowl as he looked at Craig with a narrowed gaze. “I can’t tell if that’s supposed to be an insult or not.”

“Why would it be an insult? I… I like it?” He said the last part like a question, his voice wavering. Tweek cocked his head and looked up at him with a strange look. Then he had a flash of a smile on his face, too quick for Craig to soak in. It was a shame because Craig thought the blond had a beautiful smile.

“You’re a weird guy, Craig. Like, what’s with the hood?” Tweek suddenly gulped as he glanced at Craig in suspicion. “You’re not… You’re not an assassin, right? Or a criminal!? Are you going to kill me!?”

Craig growled under his breath. As pretty as he was, this guy was coming out to be slightly deranged.

“No, I’m not going to kill you. What’s with that?”

“S-Sorry,” Tweek apologized nervously as he fiddled with his fingers, his cheeks turning red in embarrassment.

That unexpectedly made Craig feel kind of bad, and he waved Tweek off with a flick of his hand. Then he turned to look at the book he’d been examining earlier, now not wanting to look Tweek in his eyes. The damn things were too distracting, too delicious to look at.

This guy was proving to be bad for Craig’s health in the worst and best ways possible.

The taller man picked the book off the shelf and flipped through the pages. To Craig’s dismay, Tweek stepped closer to look over his shoulder and see what Craig was reading. He was so close that the action should have felt invasive, but Craig found that he quite liked the masculine, earthy scent of the blond. For the first time, he wished he wasn’t wearing this cloak, wondering if he would have felt the warmth of Tweek’s body without it.

“Do you want it?” Tweek abruptly asked, causing Craig to slam the book shut. “I mean… You were looking at it earlier, right?”

Obviously, Craig did want it, but he knew that his father would find out somehow. He always did have a knack for ruining everything that Craig loved. And if he knew that Craig was back to obsessing over his “childish” interests, then he would become furious. It’s not like the prince was afraid of the king, but he knew his dad would have the book burned, and it felt like such a waste.

Sliding the book back onto the shelf again, Craig replied, “Not really. I mean, I don’t need it.”

Tweek looked at Craig with a frown, like he wasn’t satisfied with that response; although, he didn’t push further. Instead, he scratched the back of his head before talking again and trying to change the subject.

“You like space?” he asked, even though he knew the answer. Craig nodded, and Tweek stepped towards the telescope by the window, running his hand along the scope. He looked embarrassed. “Well, um… This is usually for sale—”

“I can’t buy it,” Craig interrupted. A telescope was even harder to sneak into his room than a book.

Tweek huffed angrily.

“Shut up! I’m not trying to bargain with you!” he yelled. The other patrons looked at the two of them and Tweek chuckled nervously before continuing with a lowered voice. His cheeks were abnormally pink. “Normally, we don’t let customers touch the merchandise, but if you want to come by tonight when my—ngh!—dad is asleep and use it, I won’t tell anyone.”

Craig blinked at him. “What do you want?”

“Huh?”

“For letting me use the telescope,” Craig replied obviously. “What do you want in return?”

“Um… Nothing?” he answered, cocking his head to the side incredulously. Craig blinked at him again, this time in awe.

“You don’t want anything?” That couldn’t be right. Nothing in the world came free, as King Thomas always said, and Craig had never had anyone offer to do anything for him out of the goodness of their heart. Whether they admitted it or not, there was always something to be gained for them, whether it be renown with the prince, money, or anything else.

“No… I just thought I’d be nice,” Tweek said with a pout. His cheeks weren’t pink anymore, and he looked annoyed. “Listen, man, if you don’t want to—”

“No!” Craig interrupted. Tweek glared at the prince for interrupting him again, but he stopped when he saw Craig look downwards sadly. “I do want to… but I can’t.”

When Tweek asked why, Craig just sighed. The real reason was that he knew he couldn’t come back after he left. By the end of the day, he’d be back at the castle, never to be free on his own again. He knew the king would likely have guards posted outside of his door every second of the day to ensure that Craig never snuck out again. He knew that getting into this, but he thought it would be worth it to experience true independence just once in his life.

Unfortunately, he hadn’t banked on meeting Tweek. And he hadn’t banked on how sad he’d be to never see the blonde again.

“Listen, Tweek,” Craig said as he stepped towards the blond, who was now leaning on the window sill. The moment he moved forward, he felt someone tug his cloak off his shoulders, the brown cloth slipping off behind him. Shocked, he spun around and looked down to see that it was Stripe who had found her way to the ground again and tugged the edge of the cloak. Since when had she become so strong?

“Stripe!” he hissed as he yanked the cloak and quickly tied it back on. He grabbed Stripe and shoved her back in his bag as punishment, making sure she wouldn’t be able to hop out. When he turned back to Tweek, the blond was standing directly in front of him, much closer, and looking under his hood. Craig went to grab the hood tighter around his face, but Tweek gripped his hands to stop him. The blond was unexpectedly strong, and Craig actually struggled in his grip.

Tweek’s eyes stared up at his face as Craig’s breath hitched. Now Tweek would find out who he was and rat him out to the guards for a reward. Or maybe he’d be mad that Craig hid his identity? Either way, Craig didn’t like the way that Tweek’s head ever-so-slowly tilted to the side as his big blue eyes stared up at Craig’s face.

Then he suddenly let go and took a step back and gave a single tug to his hair.

“You—hmph!—look better w-without it.”

Craig gulped. “Erm… What?”

“Th-The hood, I mean,” Tweek answered as he looked at the ground nervously. “Y-You have a nice face—! You don’t need to wear it. Oh god. Why did I say that?” The last part he muttered under his breath.

The prince gulped again as he felt his cheeks heating up, and he wondered if it was even visible on his face. People often told him that his emotions were hard to read. (Well, unless that emotion was anger. Craig was great at expressing that.)

He was surprised, but thankful, that Tweek didn’t recognize him. Craig practically whimpered out a small, “Thanks.” Tweek seemed pleased with that and gave him a small smile in return.

They stayed like that for a moment, Tweek staring up at Craig happily, like Craig’s thanks was some sort of praise. Meanwhile, Craig looked down at Tweek and wondered if he’d always had that cute dusting of freckles across his cheeks.

The moment, however, was ruined when the front entrance of the shop suddenly swung open, the two doors banging loudly as they collided with the wall. A man stepped in, letting the doors slam shut behind them as everyone turned to look at him. He was noticeably round and fat in a way that Craig had never seen before, and he had a large bag in his hand. The prince noticed the way Tweek’s posture stiffened and leaned down to whisper in his ear.

“Who is he?” Craig asked in a hushed tone.

“Tax collector,” Tweek whispered back, a noticeable shakiness to his voice. He sounded afraid, and Craig instantly felt his heart sink.

Then he felt angry. Who the fuck dared to interrupt Craig’s very important gazing session? He wanted to look at Tweek happy and smiling, not scared. Craig almost went to put an arm around Tweek’s shoulder, but he remembered how jumpy the man was and held back. He didn’t want to make things worse.

A man with light brown hair stepped out from behind a bookshelf and nervously walked up to the men. Tweek’s breath hitched as he muttered something under his breath, but Craig didn’t quite catch it.

“Cartman,” the man said smoothly, though there was an edge in his tone. “How can I help you?”

“You know what I want, Richard,” the fat man replied snarkily. His voice was high-pitched and annoying, and Craig instantly wanted him to shut up and leave. Then he wanted to keep looking at Tweek until he went blind from the brightness that practically encapsulated his entire being.

Shaking his head, Craig had to remind himself that this was a serious moment and he forced himself to stop daydreaming about Tweek’s face.

“B-But Cartman,” Richard answered, “we already paid our dues this month—”

“Oh, shut it,” Cartman interrupted as he rolled his eyes. He looked at Richard as if he was wasting his precious time. Then he continued, “I realized how hard I’ve been working, you know? I’ve had to walk around the whole village, collecting people’s taxes, right?”

He inched closer to Richard. Craig felt Tweek tug on his cloak and he leaned down.

“Craig!” he whispered. “That’s my dad!”

Craig had to stop himself from replying something along the lines of “So?”

“Then just tell him to pay the guy so he’ll leave!” Craig replied back instead, quietly. Tweek rolled his eyes and softly groaned.

“Dude, how out of touch are you? Cartman won’t leave until my dad pays him big bucks.” Craig looked at him blankly, making Tweek elbow him in the stomach rather hard. Craig let out a hiss as Tweek spat in his ear, “He’s been bleeding the entire village dry for months now! We don’t have that kind of money!”

“So then what happens?” Craig asked weakly, still keeling from the strike. Tweek didn’t have a chance to answer as the two men at the front of the store continued their conversation.

“Sir, please,” Richard begged. “I don’t have anything else to give you. My son and I are already—”

“Oh, right,” Cartman interjected, not paying much attention to Richard. “That son of yours… Where is he?”

The fat man’s eyes circled the store before finally landing on Tweek. His face was a weird mixture of anger, excitement, and something predatory. Even Craig felt his bones chill and the look wasn’t even directed at him. Of course, Tweek nervously tensed next to him.

When Cartman stepped closer, Craig resisted the urge to make a comment about his smell. Even he knew that it was an entirely inappropriate time, and he didn’t want to get Tweek into any more trouble than necessary, especially since Tweek was so nervous about Cartman’s presence.

“What’s your name again?” Cartman asked, although he obviously didn’t care. Craig was slightly annoyed at the fact that this ‘Cartman’ didn’t even acknowledge him, who was still standing behind Tweek. “Twerk?”

“It’s Tweek,” the blond replied, and even though his voice was shaking, it was also firm.

“Right,” Cartman replied, not listening. “I told you last month what would happen if your dad didn’t pay me, right?” Tweek suddenly shivered as he took a step back, shooting Cartman a dirty glare.

The man took it as an invitation to continue his point, reaching out to wrap a rough hand around Tweek’s wrist and pulling him closer. “Since he can’t, looks like you’re working for me for a while.”

Work for him? Craig thought, utterly confused. He’d been wanting to step in, but he was still afraid of making things worse for Tweek. Cartman seemed like an important person, and he obviously had some sort of power over the blond and his family. He also figured that was why Tweek was holding his tongue against the man.

Cartman looked Tweek up and down for a moment before nodding in satisfaction. “Thin, blond, blue-eyed… You’ll make a fine courtesan of sorts.”

Okay, now Craig couldn’t hold himself back.

“Fuck off, Fatboy,” he said before delivering a kick straight to his round stomach. Instantly, Cartman let go of Tweek’s wrist, falling down on his ass as Tweek stumbled back into Craig’s chest. Craig placed his hands on Tweek’s shoulders to steady him as the blond looked up at him in shock.

“Craig, holy shit.”

“Waaaah!” Cartman cried, furiously jumping up to his feet. His face was red and he was panting, either from anger or the physical exertion of having to stand up. “Who the fuck are you to disrespect my authoriteh!”

“What the fuck does it matter?” Craig asked as he crossed his arms. In the back of his mind, he imagined the field day that his parents would have if they could see him now, getting into physical altercations and using language not at all suited for a prince. “Get out of here and leave Tweek alone.”

Cartman stomped his foot on the ground like a toddler who had been denied a toy. His hands were clenched at his sides as his cheeks puffed in anger. He was obviously not used to being told “no” before, and Craig watched in satisfaction as his face contorted into a pathetic mess of frustration.

“You little—!” Cartman fumbled through his words. “Do you even know who I am!? I’ll have this entire store shut down! And you!” He pointed to Craig. “What a shame it would be for you and your little ‘boy toy’ to disappear.”

Much to Craig’s surprise, Tweek finally piped up again. “Your problem is with me, Cartman! Leave Craig alone!”

“Craig?” Cartman repeated with a sneer. “Like that stupid prince? Is that why you think you can talk to me like that? You think you’re royalty or something?”

Craig went to bark another insult, but Tweek put a firm hand on his shoulder as he shook his head. He sighed and looked downcast.

“Just forget it, Craig. I don’t—erk!—want you to get hurt.” He turned to face Cartman with his arms crossed as he hesitantly said, “You win, Cartman. I’ll go with you.”

That seemed to please the fat man, a sick smile forming on his face. He was, of course, happy to walk out of the altercation a winner. Meanwhile, Craig’s eyes widened.

“Tweek, seriously? He’s gonna—”

“Ack! I know!” Tweek replied angrily, tugging at his hair. “But I have to! I don’t want something to happen to my dad. Or you.”

Craig felt his chest ache a little bit. Tweek was much too nice for his own good, willing to throw his body away for a complete stranger. At the same time, he was somewhat pleased to know that meant Tweek must have cared for him, even a little bit.

With a sigh, Craig stepped forward, nudging Tweek out of the way. Then he pulled his hood down to reveal his face with a pointed glare toward Cartman. Normally, Craig felt shitty using his position to get what he wanted, but if it meant protecting Tweek, he figured it was worth it. Immediately, his face fell as he sputtered at the prince.

“Y-You’re…” Craig almost smirked to see Cartman’s face drain of color.

“I hereby order you to get the fuck out and never come back,” Craig declared as everyone else in the store suddenly started whispering among themselves. “Or else.”

Funnily, Cartman let out an annoyed sound in the back of his throat before ultimately kneeling down and lowering his head.

“Hmph. Of course… Your Majesty.” He was clearly angry.

“‘Your Majesty?’” Tweek mumbled with a raised brow.

Ignoring him, Craig rolled his eyes. “Just leave, Fatass.”

Cartman scurried out the door with his tail between his legs, the long silence being interrupted only by the sound of the door slamming shut behind him. There were a couple of murmurs throughout the store as the patrons looked at Craig in awe. Tweek, mind still racing from the interaction with Cartman, was still blinking blankly, trying to piece together what was going on.

The two of them watched as someone suddenly kneeled on the ground as Cartman had done before. And then another. Soon enough, everyone besides Tweek was on the ground, bowing their heads to Craig. That was when Tweek’s jaw suddenly dropped.

“You’re the prince?!” he guffawed. Craig smiled guiltily as he looked down at him.

“Er… Yeah.”

“But—! You—! We—!” Tweek was sputtering incoherently now. Then: “I called your guinea pig a rat!”

The prince raised a brow. That was what he was worried about? “Yes? It’s fine, Tweek.”

“Why would you hide that? Waaah!” Tweek shouted, making everyone look at them awkwardly. The way that Tweek sounded genuinely hurt made Craig feel guilty, and he blushed in embarrassment.

“Because—”

Before he could finish, the entrance was being ripped open again, the wall shaking as the door collided with it.

“Can you guys stop doing that!?” Tweek cried in frustration. Craig felt bad to see the man overwhelmed as he started biting at his nails. He wanted to reach out to stop him, but the group of guards who had just come in interrupted him.

“There he is!” they shouted, pointing at Craig. The prince sighed in defeat.

“Because of that,” he finished as the guards ran to him. They shoved Tweek out of the way, who let out a loud yell of surprise. Craig’s eyebrows furrowed. “Hey, watch it!”

“Your Majesty!” one of the guards said as he bowed respectfully. “Your father has been looking for you. You are needed at the castle immediately.”

“Yeah, I know,” Craig groaned. He shoved past the guard and walked back up to Tweek. “Tweek, I’m…. sorry for being dishonest.” The apology felt weird on his tongue. He wasn’t used to owning up for his mistakes. “I didn’t mean to hurt you… Listen, I just thought—”

Tweek frowned. “Thought what?”

“I…” Craig trailed off, not knowing how to finish. He never wanted Tweek to figure out who he was. Meeting Tweek was the first time someone had treated Craig like a person. Even now, knowing who he was, Tweek wasn’t bowing respectfully or watching his tongue. In fact, he had his hands on his hips and was staring up at the prince in irritation.

“You lied.”

“I didn’t lie,” Craig answered defensively. “You never asked who I was!”

The shorter waved his arms frantically. “Obviously I would’ve liked to know!” He looked down sadly as he mumbled, “I thought we…”

“Sir, we really must get going,” the guard interrupted, causing the prince to groan.

“One second!” Craig growled angrily, but Tweek shook his head.

“No, you should get going,” he agreed with a scowl. “You have no place among us commoners.”

Craig opened his mouth to say something in response, but he was suddenly being dragged out of the building by a couple of his father’s knights.

He struggled against them as he shouted, “Wait! Tweek!”

The blond just turned around with an indignant ‘hmph!’ as Craig was taken outside. As he got dragged away, the prince watched as Tweek’s back got further and further away until eventually the door closed and he was out of sight completely.

His father did indeed have a lot to say when Craig got home.

Well, not exactly. Thomas was so angry at his son that it had become physically impossible for him to form words. Instead, he ended up with something similar to what Craig had heard from Tweek earlier:

“Craig, you little—! I oughta—!” Thomas slouched in his throne, rubbing his face with his hands. He stumbled around his words for a minute straight until he was able to spit out a, “What were you thinking?”

“I was thinking,” Craig seethed, “that I don’t want to do this, Father!”

“Don’t want to do what?”

“This!” Craig cried as he motioned aimlessly to the room around them. When the king looked at him blankly, Craig glowered. Then he ran a hand through his silky black hair. “I don’t want to be king, Your Majesty.”

‘Oh Jesus,” Thomas mumbled into his hands. “This again?”

“I’m serious!” the prince insisted. “Why can’t Trisha get married and take your place instead?”

“Craig,” Laura sighed. The man had forgotten that his mother was even present, despite the fact that she was sitting right next to Thomas. “We’ve been over this. It is the firstborn son’s job to take the throne. It’s the law.”

“Then change it!”

“No!” the king cried furiously, slamming a fist onto the armrest. He stood up suddenly, just like he had at dinner, and Craig responded by crossing his arms defiantly. “You will get married and you will rule the kingdom! Such has been the way of this family for hundreds of years!”

“But—”

“No.”

Craig paused. His dad’s tone was dark and firm, and the prince felt a shiver go down his spine. Craig could handle a screaming match, but he’d never heard the king so flat. His statement was so emotionless that it caught Craig off guard, and he sputtered before angrily turning around and storming out of the room again.

Now, a few days later, Craig ended up at this stupid ball that he’d been planning to ditch for months. There were countless other ways that he’d rather be spending his twenty-first birthday: looking at the stars, playing with Stripe, playing a prank on Clyde, or even talking to Tweek one last time.

Tweek…

It had been around a week since Craig had seen him, and the blond’s hurt face had haunted his dreams every night since. As much as he would try to imagine Tweek smiling with Stripe perched on his shoulder, it would always be overshadowed by Tweek’s sullen expression when he realized that Craig had lied to him. Although, Craig would continue to argue that he never lied to anyone. Still, he knew he was being intentionally dishonest.

If Tweek had known that Craig was a prince from the start, would he have treated him any differently? He liked to think that he wouldn’t. After all, Tweek seemed like someone who couldn’t hold back from speaking his mind, and all of his reactions were so easy to read—like when he’d elbowed Craig without a second thought. Craig’s stomach was sore for days after that, and he wondered if Tweek secretly worked out.

The pain was all gone by now, and as Craig watched people dancing, drinking, and laughing in the ballroom, he secretly wished that his stomach still hurt. Then he’d have something to remember Tweek by.

Clyde, who was standing next to him, noticed Craig’s melancholy expression and rolled his eyes.

“Are you still thinking about him?”

Craig gave him a sidelong glance. “What do you think?”

“You know,” Clyde replied, seemingly ignoring Craig’s reaction, “I always had a hunch.”

“Hunch about what?”

The advisor shrugged. “Well, you never seemed interested in women.”

“You’re annoying,” was all Craig answered, knowing he couldn’t really argue.

Speaking of which, a woman in a pretty dress approached the two, a bright smile on her face. Craig noticed the way Clyde’s eyes instantly dropped to her chest, and he resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He felt Stripe moving around in the pocket of his shirt, and he wondered if she’d caught him staring, too.

“Your Majesty,” the woman said, bowing politely. Craig blew a long breath out of his mouth.

“‘Sup?” Clyde elbowed him in the arm, and Craig let out a small grunt before correcting himself. “I mean… Greetings.”

“I’m Princess Annie of…” By the time she had finished saying her name, Craig had already zoned out. She had blonde, curly hair. It was bright, but not nearly as bright as Tweek’s, and Craig found himself instantly turned off. When he had zoned back in, he realized that the woman had finished speaking and was looking at him expectantly.

“Uh, what?”

She puffed her cheeks a little. “I asked if you wanted to dance.”

“Oh, no thanks, Amber.”

“Annie.”

“Who?” Craig asked in confusion before shaking his head. “Listen, I’m not in a dancing mood right now.”

The woman’s smile was tight as her eye twitched in annoyance. Craig was, again, reminded of Tweek, although her twitching wasn’t half as charming.

“Oh… Alright then.” She curtsied before turning around and walking away. With her back turned, Craig heard her mumble under her breath. “Dickwad…”

“Dude,” Clyde hissed when she was out of earshot, sounding genuinely annoyed. “That was, like, the hottest girl here.”

Craig crossed his arms. “So?”

“Ugh, you’re like a lost puppy,” was his friend’s complaint. Craig just sighed.

“I don’t think I can do this, Clyde.”

“Do what? Pick a wife? I’ll do it for you.”

“Get married at all, moron!” Craig replied angrily. “All these girls, they’re just…”

The advisor raised an eyebrow when he trailed off. “Just what?”

Craig looked down, crestfallen, as he softly kicked the floor with his shoe. Clyde gulped. It was the first time he’d seen Craig so genuinely sad.

“Just… not Tweek,” the prince finished.

Then Clyde looked at Craig closer, noting how heartbroken the prince looked. Unfortunately, Clyde had no clue how to comfort his friend. He opened his mouth to say something, shut it, opened it again, and then shut it again. He continued doing this, moving his mouth like a fish out of water as he struggled to think of something to say. Eventually, he sighed as he rubbed his face with his hands.

“He really means that much to you?” asked Clyde.

Craig scowled at him. “Were you not listening to my woes at all?”

“Go.”

“Go?”

“Go!” Clyde repeated more urgently. Craig looked at him stupidly, causing Clyde to groan. “God. ‘Go to him’ or whatever.”

“Go to who?” Craig asked, intelligently.

“To Tweek, you fucking idiot!” Clyde grabbed his friend by the shoulders and started shaking him. Craig let out a gurgled noise as he fought against Clyde’s grip. “I’ll distract your dad while you make a run for it!”

Craig’s mouth fell agape. “R-Really?”

“Yes!”

The royal’s mouth twisted into a smile before almost immediately frowning again. Clyde sighed in annoyance as his eyes rolled to the back of his skull.

“What now?”

“I doubt he even wants to see me again,” Craig replied pathetically, looking at the ground like a child who’d been scolded.

“Why? Because you lied to him?”

“Was dishonest with him,” Craig corrected.

Clyde responded by punching him in the arm hard, causing Craig to yell out in pain. “You never know unless you try. Quit being a pussy and go get your man.”

He cringed at his own words but felt slightly better when Craig looked up at him hopefully.

“You mean it?”

Clyde almost wanted to say no to watch Craig’s confidence deflate, but he decided that it wasn’t worth it. Instead, he grabbed Craig by the shoulders, turned him around, and then shoved him forward in the direction of the door. Craig wasted no time in waving his friend goodbye and shoving past people to run out of the castle. At some point, he bumped into a woman and completely ignored her as she fell to the ground. She let out a long series of curses, which fell upon Craig’s deaf ears as he didn’t even spare her a glance.

When he made it to the front gates, there were people in carriages still waiting to get into the front courtyard. Without a second thought, Craig ran up to one of the horses pulling the carriages and started unbuckling it from the coach.

“Um, excuse me?” a man asked, his voice nasally and obnoxious. Craig waved him off.

“Gonna borrow your horse,” was all he said as he climbed on. Then he followed it with, “You’re, like, three hours late, by the way. Hyah!”

He snapped the reins of the horse, causing the animal to whinny before running toward the village. Craig’s cape was flowing behind him in the wind like a knight on his way to save a princess. Stripe squeaked in his pocket, and Craig took his hand off of the reins for a moment to make sure she was tugged snuggly in his shirt.

“Don’t worry, Stripe,” he reassured. “I doubt he’ll be mad at you.”

As if she could understand him, Stripe let out another squeak before sticking her head out the top of the cloth and feeling the wind in her face.

Seeing as he was on horseback, Craig made it quickly to the village this time. The prince noted that it was dark outside, and part of him started to fear that Tweek’s store would already be closed or something—still, he shoved that thought to the back of his head. He would be willing to throw rocks at Tweek’s window if he needed to. (Although, he hoped he wouldn’t because Tweek would probably beat him up if he got broken glass all over him.)

To his surprise, when he arrived at the shop, Tweek was outside, locking the door behind him. When he heard the sound of horse hooves clacking on the ground behind him, he spun around with wide eyes.

“Wah! C-Craig!?” he cried in bafflement.

“Tweek!” he called back, jumping off the horse. He unceremoniously started to trip over his feet as he ran up to Tweek and placed his hands on the blond’s shoulders. Tweek stared up at him with his giant bug eyes, and Craig noted the way the moonlight reflected across the wet surface of his irises. He resisted the urge to lean down and kiss Tweek right then and there.

“Um. Hello,” Craig replied. Tweek blinked up at him and then grimaced.

“What are you doing here?”

Craig gulped. Maybe he should have planned out what he wanted to say ahead of time.

Oh well, it was now or never.

“Tweek, I’m sorry.”

That took Tweek by surprise. His eyes widened as he stared up at the taller man. “Wait, really?”

“Yes.” There was a silence as Tweek waited for Craig to continue. When he didn’t, Tweek frowned resentfully.

“Gah! Say what you’re sorry for, dipshit.”

“Oh, right. I’m sorry for being dis—” Tweek’s eyes narrowed. “I mean, I’m sorry that I lied, Tweek.”

Much to Craig’s surprise, the blond’s expression soften. He looked to the side for a moment, biting his bottom lip as he thought of what to say. Then he turned to face Craig again with his pretty eyes.

“Ack! I-It’s fine. I’m sorry, too, I guess.”

Craig’s eyes bulged out of his head. “You’re sorry? For what?”

“For being so rude to you,” Tweek replied like it was obvious. He looked down almost shamefully. “I was angry that you didn’t tell me who you were, but I know that—ngh!—you probably had your reasons.”

“I did,” Craig clarified. When Tweek looked up at him in anticipation, he continued. “I guess… I was scared that you’d see me differently if you knew who I was.”

He ran a hand through his hair. “I mean, you’re the first person who treated me… normally? I mean, most people are afraid of me or something, but…”

He wasn’t sure how to continue, but he didn’t need to. Tweek gave him a comforting smile as he stared up at him.

“It’s okay, Craig. I get it.” Then under his breath, he added, “I think.”

There was another awkward silence as Craig zoned in on Tweek’s handsome face. In response, Tweek started whistling awkwardly and tapping his foot.

“Well,” the blond continued, “thanks for coming all the way here to tell me that, I guess.”

Craig perked up, realizing he’d gotten distracted.

“Oh, sorry, I also wanted to say that…. Um…” He blushed. “I really like you Tweek. Like, I love you, I think.”

Tweek’s jaw dropped to the floor as Craig suddenly kneeled on the pavement, taking both of Tweek’s hands in his.

“Oops, I forgot a ring. Anyways, will you marry me?”

The blond blinked down at him in shock. There was a long pause before he let out a bloodcurdling scream. Craig almost fell back on his haunches as he ripped his hands from Tweek’s to cover his ears.

“Waaaaaaah! What the fuck!? Are you insane!?” Tweek screamed before he grabbed Craig by the shirt and pulled him forcefully to his feet. He then started shaking him furiously. “We just met a week ago! Why are you proposing to me!?”

“What!?” Craig cried in genuine confusion as he tried to grab Tweek by the shoulders to calm him down. The blond didn’t relent, continuing to shake the prince back and forth as Craig could practically feel his brain bouncing around in his skull. “Wait, Tweek! Hold on!”

“You are such an idiot!” Tweek yelled before he finally let the prince go. Craig had to take a minute to steady himself as Tweek grabbed his blond hair and started yanking on it.

“B-But that’s what they do in the stories!” Craig reasoned and Tweek looked at him like he’d grown a second head.

“This is real life, you dick!”

“Oh…” Craig looked down dejectedly. “Is… Is that a no?”

Tweek sighed as he rubbed his temples. He was still twitching uncontrollably, but he felt himself calming down ever-so-slightly.

“Of course it’s a no!” he replied angrily as he glared at Craig. Then his expression softened when he saw Craig looking at the ground all depressed. He sighed again before reaching up and grabbing both sides of Craig’s face (maybe a little harder than he meant to). The prince tried to talk, but his face being smooshed was making his words unintelligible.

Tweek continued. “It’s a no for now.”

Craig finally was freed from Tweek’s clutches, but he knitted his eyebrows together. “Erm, what?”

Tweek scoffed before he crossed his arms and looked to the side, avoiding Craig’s gaze. There was a pretty blush on his cheeks and Craig had to once again resist the urge to devour his lips then and there.

“I… Ugh! I like you too, Craig,” he admitted, scratching his cheek. He watched as Craig’s expression formed into that of shock before he cracked into a wide smile and started to lean in. Tweek put a hand on his chest to halt him. “B-But we just met! We can’t get married now.”

Craig blinked again, not knowing what to say. To be honest, he wasn’t really sure about marrying Tweek so quickly either, but all of the stories that Trisha had made him read as a child made it seem like it was the status quo. He had a lot to learn about normal social interaction.

The prince stared flatly as he said, “Oh… What can we do?”

The blond blushed. “Hng. Well, let’s start with this.”

He grabbed the front of Craig’s shirt tightly again, and the taller man squeezed his eyes shut and prepared himself to be shaken again, or maybe even bodyslammed onto the ground. Tweek was unpredictable like that.

However, he was pleased to find that Tweek had instead pulled him down to his height so that he could press their lips together. Craig froze stupidly, not knowing how to react. Where were his hands supposed to go? Was he supposed to stick his tongue in or something?

Fuck it. I’ll just do what I want, he thought before melting into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Tweek’s waist awkwardly. Despite how strange it felt to kiss someone for the first time, he also felt a light airy feeling at Tweek pressed against him. Happily, he reveled in the feel of Tweek’s warm mouth moving against his lips. In the back of his mind, he noted how cracked and chapped the blond’s lips were, but he decided to hold his tongue, knowing that anything he said would ruin the mood.

When they separated, Craig had a shit-eating grin on his face.

“I think I can live with that.”

Tweek rolled his eyes before Craig leaned down to greedily kiss him again. The two of them jumped apart in shock when they heard a sudden squeak between them. Craig had completely forgotten that Stripe was even present, and he suddenly felt very guilty, like Stripe was a kid walking in on them doing something dirty. Tweek cocked a brow.

“Oh… And Stripe missed you, too,” Craig added.

The blond blew a long breath from between his lips before he gently picked Stripe out of Craig’s pocket and started rubbing his cheek against the guinea pig’s head.

“Well, I missed Stripe, too. Much more than I missed you,” he teased before placing a kiss on the top of Stripe’s head. Craig crossed his arms and glared.

“Hey! Stripe, quit stealing him from me!”

“Oh my god, dude. You are such an idiot.”